i feel empty inside unless someone is actively giving me attention. i wish a lobotomy would fix me.
have you ever considered lobotomizing yourself with a bullet?
>>78282378>have you ever considered lobotomizing yourself with a bullet?yes i have , what about you?
>>78282372I'll give you attention but you have to give me attention too. What did you do today?
>>78282372From whom would you like the most attention from? Men, or women? Older than you?
>>78282372Find someone who is needy and clingy.You'll never really run out of attention then, in fact you'll be suffocating from it.
>>78282388i did barely anyting notable today . i just read a book and listened to music. what did you do today?>>78282389any is fine>>78282391i talk to clingy people but theyre not clingy enough. i feel like my need for attention has gotten worse overtime. i have limerent tendencies and tend to get attached to people who dont give me attention/inconsistent attention. my brain is so retarded.
>>78282410Worked and played some video games then I watched the final episode of fallout with my brother. What book did you read? How far are you in it? What kinda music do you listen to?
>>78282423that is a cute image you postedim reading severance by ling ma right now. my ebook reader says im 29% into it. im enjoying it a lot so far. i listen to a lot of different genres of music. this is the current song im listening to:https://youtu.be/dSw8CucthGc?si=LXQPZv22LG1vVakW
>>78282410>any is fineWhat's your favorite type of interaction though? Do you like when people complement you or say how much they like you? Want someone to fall in love with you? Or do you want people talking to you about your favorite anime/vidya or whatever.
>>78282449Hey this song is pretty good, and ty I try to have good images. Never heard of the book before but it seems to be cool I like slow apocalypse stuff where it's mainly nonviolent societal collapse.
>>78282449what made you pick up the book?>>78282410how clingy is clingy enough for you?
>>78282467i like it when people also can romanticize the grotesque and are weird as fuck. don't really like when people compliment me because it feels fake. >>78282486i love non-violent (or mostly non-violent) post apocalyptic stories so much, they're my favorite kind of stories. just finished reading "i who have never known men" which is similar.>>78282496>what made you pick up the book?saw a recommendation on pinterest that said "existential dread and contemplating existence as a whole" and it included books i liked and have read. the only book i didnt read in the post was severance, which i am currently reading.>how clingy is clingy enough for you?i think i would just hate someone if they were super clingy to me desu. i only tend to crave affection from people who don't give me it. i wish my brain wasn't so fucked up.
>>78282606what are the grotesque things you like to romanticize, cutting together? inflicting pain? it does sound torturous to crave affection specifically from people who don't give it to you. it sounds like you enjoy the pursuit more so than the actual prize. have you ever had a successful romance?
>>78282372this fake ame isnt bad as long as you ignore the attention seeking i guess
>>78282606Cute Madoka and Homura pic, thanks for responding!
>>78282606>I who have never known menFemcel post apocalypse lmao. Haven't heard of it before either. They are really unique alot of the times too which I really like. What else do you like to do for fun.
>>78282645>what are the grotesque things you like to romanticizealmost anything that is under the umbrella of a toxic relationship dynamic. >have you ever had a successful romance?it depends on what you define successful as >it sounds like you enjoy the pursuit more so than the actual prize.i feel like i don't enjoy any part of it at all, besides the rare times i actually obtain the affection/attention i crave. >>78282653i wish i was more like ame. she's so much more cute and has more personality. i'm too robotic and autistic.
>>78282672>almost anything that is under the umbrella of a toxic relationship dynamic. fighting, manipulation, cheating?>it depends on what you define successful as something you enjoyed.>besides the rare times i actually obtain the affection/attention i crave. do those times last, or do you find your desire for that attention to vanish over time after you finally get it?
>>78282672ill take ur word for it i guessatleast you are not as bad as the other ame poster if that makes you feel any better
BPDEMON ALERT!Abandon all hope ye who enter this thread. There is no qt3.14 femcel sweetie to be pursued here. There is only a ravenous black hole that will devour all attention and affection while screaming for more. Go to a fucking shrink OP.
>>78282706wrong ame newfriend
>>78282669>What else do you like to do for fun.i cut myself , or workout/dance to vocaloid mmds until i can't feel my legs . im kind of boring sorryyyyy>>78282693>fighting, manipulation, cheating?ehh maybe more like manipulating maybe? i like anything that crosses boundaries of societal expectations of normal. hate, love, disgust. anything that makes two people coming closer and closer to a singular entity, inseparable from eachother. >something you enjoyed.i sometimes enjoy it, but most of the time hate it>do those times last, or do you find your desire for that attention to vanish over time after you finally get it?no :( it just gets worse>>78282702thank you :3
>>78282706>>78282713i'm not diagnosed with bpd but i act like a bpdemon so they're not wrong at least
>>78282713Still true probably. Be real, it describes every woman on the board.
>>78282702I don't like the other one that just yells and loses her shit, her posts are boring.
>>78282713Dipshit namefag.
>>78282716>i cut myselfCan I see?
>>78282728ur right>>78282724so basically the average female on this site
>>78282716>workout/dance to vocaloid mmds until i can't feel my legsVocaloid enjoyers are actually very based, which is the opposite of boring.
>>78282740lebron james ass hairline
>>78282741no you may not nigger>>78282748>so basically the average female on this siteno.. im special and cool . im different from everyone else. that's what all the men say to me so it must be true.>>78282757post a vocaloid song you like .
>>78282760Your niggerbabble means nothing to me. Slit your wrists and post it so you can actually contribute something of worth to this board.
>>78282716so more about making someone obsessed with you at all times, and manipulating them to that end. then you can put them down or pick up the pieces as you see fit? trauma bonding and becoming co dependent. >i sometimes enjoy it, but most of the time hate itcould you greentext what one of the times you enjoyed was? do you find them all too fleeting or not intense enough in the end?>no :( it just gets worseyou rebuke them or you lust for more and more of their time and affection? it sounds hard to deal with and keep up. i can't imagine it's sustainable over the internet, it's the kind of passion that requires holding and digging into someone's flesh.>workout/dance to vocaloid mmdsyou must be an expert at ddr.
>>78282672>almost anything that is under the umbrella of a toxic relationship dynamic.are you into bdsm? i feel like a bdsm relationship would be a healthy way for you to have a relationship like that
>>78282764ill keep taking your word for it>>78282771I saw lebron james hairline climbing up a cable pole
>>78282716>Cut myself omg you are a real life ame poster. Where do I add your discord so I can stay up to date on your life. Working out to vocaloid mmd is unique. What kinda working out do you do.
>>78282787i'm not really into sexual things i'm more into like violence and consumption as a form of love if you know what i mean. im more like let's mind meld together and become two beings into one. im more like let me force you to do disgusting shit and you do the same to me. >>78282772>you rebuke them or you lust for more and more of their time and affection?depends on how im in the mood then. either i feel disgusted or insanely in love once i receive affection. i guess it also depends on the type of affection. it's a swinging pendulum. >you must be an expert at ddr.i haven't played ddr in forever :(>>78282790i'm already talking to a lot of peopel on discord that i find annoying to keep up with. do you have any interesting reason(s) for me to add you?
>>78282828>i'm not really into sexual things i'm more into like violence and consumption as a form of love if you know what i mean. im more like let's mind meld together and become two beings into one. im more like let me force you to do disgusting shit and you do the same to me.i dont mean the sexual aspects of bdsm. i mean a relationship where your partner dominates you and then gives you aftercare. a relationship where you completely belong to your partner. i feel like that would satisfy what you crave in a healthy way
>>78282828>a lot of peopel on discord that i find annoying to keep up with.do you find that the way you are makes it hard for you to maintain friendships?
>>78282852i don't like bdsm because it defines specific roles to each partner and it feels like both entities are separate beings with separate parts to play. i don't want to belong to my partner. i want to be them, i want them to be me. >>78282868no i think i can maintain friendships somewhat okay i just talk to a lot of people
>>78282828>consumption as a form of love if you know what i mean. im more like let's mind meld together and become two beings into one.i don't think the average person can understand but i can see how it can be an intense expression of romance. pushing boundaries further and further together. has nobody been able to keep up with you in this so far? >i guess it also depends on the type of affection. it's a swinging pendulum.i can see why you wish for a lobotomy, it's impossible to find balance when your mind is a pendulum back and forth. the lows are low but the highs must feel incredibly high. do you find there are ways to control your mood so you're able to feel that intense love, or are you at the whims of fate? >i'm already talking to a lot of peopel on discord that i find annoying to keep up withdo you find yourself moving between people looking to scratch the itch or are they more friends that have no idea how your feelings are?
>>78282877>no i think i can maintain friendships somewhat okayoftentimes bpdemons struggle to maintain friendships because friends distract them from their fp. bpdemons often feel either hateful or apathetic towards friends
>>78282828Yeah Ill post and send you really good images. And Ill give you good games to play. I need to keep up with your life so I can see if things get better for you.
>>78282828I have an edit of this image too
>>78282901i maintain friendships better if i have an "fp" that is actively giving me attention. when i have an fp i instantly get better mental health , and i stop wanting to die. when i do not have an fp i hate myself and everyone else, want to die, and feel really apathetic.>>78282888>has nobody been able to keep up with you in this so far? i haven't been in a lot of relationships, but i think it's impossible to keep up with my feelings>do you find there are ways to control your mood so you're able to feel that intense love, or are you at the whims of fate? i cut myself , take medication, or yell and start berating my fp to feel better if i feel like shit. i often get the urge to break things, but i usually stop myself.>>78282905>>78282951your images are good but idk if i want to talk to you sorry
>>78283004do you lose interests in fps? what traits do you look for in an fp? were all your fps romantic partners or can anyone be an fp?
>>78283004>i maintain friendships better if i have an "fp" that is actively giving me attention.the idea that a rising tide lifts all boats? if your fp is keeping you happy, other people get the privilege of talking to you too. it makes sense.>i haven't been in a lot of relationships, but i think it's impossible to keep up with my feelingsor maybe you haven't met the person intense enough to escalate along those boundaries with you every part of the way. the difficultly is probably when you pendulum swing to aversion when they're still obsessive, and it causing friction, or vise versa. >yell and start berating my fp to feel better if i feel like shit. i often get the urge to break things, but i usually stop myself.do you want to break your fp? mentally and physically, and then make it up to them after? true love is enduring through all of it, wouldn't you say? what's the worst thing you've done to someone if i may ask? the other men are right, you are interesting.
>>78282877what fetishes are you into then
>>78283074are you dense? they said they're not really sexual. their desire for affection is expressed in other ways.
>>78283085stop simping onions nigger
>>78283093get your rocks off elsewhere
>>78283097nigger why are you simping for some bpd whore
>>78283033i don't lose interest in fps fp traits is that they are really relatable and give me attention . they aren't normie and they understand... they are almost always also mentally illi don't really look for specific traits, it just happens. i've had few fps in my life. maybe 2-3 in my entire life? all my romantic partners have been a fp but not all fps have been a romantic partner.>>78283036>or maybe you haven't met the person intense enough to escalate along those boundaries with you every part of the way. the difficultly is probably when you pendulum swing to aversion when they're still obsessive, and it causing friction, or vise versa.i only fall in love with people who i can relate to (already a small pool) but then also who give me a bunch of attention/affection at one point but then will act coldly/dissappear at other times, causing me to be limerent. not sure if i have ever loved or have just been limerent for people. >do you want to break your fp? mentally and physically, and then make it up to them after? true love is enduring through all of it, wouldn't you say? what's the worst thing you've done to someone if i may ask?no not really.. i just want to experience everything with them. pain , happiness,, suffering, joy. i want our emotions to meld and i want to forge new self defining experiences together. i haven't done anything bad to anyone (in this context of what i want) because i've never indulged in my fantasies. other people are too boring to pursue any of this with. i want to break ourselves together, indulge in degeneracy. i haven't met enough people who want what i want. usually if it's similar they want some bdsm roleplay where there's a defined master/slave at best. i don't want a dominant/submissive role, and i dont want to define my partner as dominant/submisisve. > the other men are right, you are interesting.thank you :3333 hehhee
>>78283107>i don't lose interest in fpsyou have multiple fps? are you able to maintain any sort of relationship with someone who isnt an fp?>i want to break ourselves together, indulge in degeneracywhat sort of degeneracy do you mean?
>>78282410You don't 'need' attention. There are only 3 things you need in life: Food, water and shelter, everything else is secondary.If you cannot learn to appreciate the music of solitude first, it will become the last thing you ever shall hear.If you cannot stop using people to hide from your own inadequacies, instead of confronting them, don't be surprised when they inevitably walk away from you.I know this because I lost a good friend to this affliction, for your sake, I pray you listen and learn well.
>>78283117>you have multiple fps? are you able to maintain any sort of relationship with someone who isnt an fp?sorry i worded it wrong.. i do lose interests in fps i guess. i will lose interest in them after years of not talking to them. i can maintain friendships very easily and most of my relationships have been friendships. if you mean a romantic relationship, then no. >what sort of degeneracy do you mean?anything that makes me and them come closer to becomign one <3 >>78283127>If you cannot stop using people to hide from your own inadequacies, instead of confronting them, don't be surprised when they inevitably walk away from you.i only need to one person to use. everyone else tells me im such a great friend and so nice to them. im really good at hiding this part of me ^_^. i only inflict this inner turmoil onto my fp becuase they let me.
>>78283107>fp traits is that they are really relatable and give me attention . they aren't normie and they understand... they are almost always also mentally illthey're on the same wavelength as you. you can speak freely to them. that's relatable.>i've had few fps in my life. maybe 2-3 in my entire life? all my romantic partners have been a fp but not all fps have been a romantic partner.by this you've only had 1-2 romantic partners then? it does sound hard to find that person who matches your energy but then is able to switch it off instantly and make you feel limerent. do you get jealous and want to claw them back? it must be the most sweet sugar rush i suppose when you can feel their attention again. addictive, even? do you find yourself acting cold and disappearing on your fp as well?>pain , happiness,, suffering, joy. i want our emotions to meld and i want to forge new self defining experiences together.pain is an experience like happiness. bdsm is a misnomer and a shallow view of things where there's a hierarchy, where the reality is both being in control of each other. what are a few of your fantasies? cutting into each other? forcing them to isolate themselves from everyone but yourself? intentionally making them jealous?>thank you :3333 hehheepat pat>i only inflict this inner turmoil onto my fp becuase they let me.do you have an fp right now?
>>78283143>everyone else tells me im such a great friend and so nice to them. im really good at hiding this part of me ^_^. i only inflict this inner turmoil onto my fp becuase they let me.i would bet my life on this not being true. i bet your friends suffer because of you
>>78283143>i can maintain friendships very easily and most of my relationships have been friendships.what do you see as friendship? how do you feel about friends vs an fp?
>>78283143>anything that makes me and them come closer to becomign one <3does this include sexual acts or do you mean something else
>>78283143My friend was good at hiding it too.Until he wasn't anymore.You can't say now, that I didn't warn you. Goodbye.
>>78283150>by this you've only had 1-2 romantic partners then?yea that's what i mean>it must be the most sweet sugar rush i suppose when you can feel their attention again. addictive, even?this explains it very well...>do you get jealous and want to claw them back?i've never had an fp do something that made me specifically jealous i think>do you find yourself acting cold and disappearing on your fp as well?yes,>what are a few of your fantasies?drinking and swallow various bodily fluids, killing eachother(metaphorically), eating eachother (metaphorically). cutting into eachother's skin. forcing them to eat food and then puke it up. wearing eachother's clothes. there's a lot more but it's hard to think of right now because my head hurts.. :(>do you have an fp right now?sadly yea.;. i go through phases of trying to cut him off because i know he will ruin my life (just being around him my brain ruins itself), and phases of trying to chase him.>>78283168i actually am not shit to my friends. i hide almost everything about myself to them. >>78283186yeah it includes sexual acts
>>78283197>drinking and swallow various bodily fluids, killing eachother(metaphorically), eating eachother (metaphorically). cutting into eachother's skin. forcing them to eat food and then puke it up. wearing eachother's clothes. there's a lot more but it's hard to think of right now because my head hurts.. :(how do you feel about anal and scat
>>78283208>how do you feel about anal and scatehh it's kind of too gross .... pee is fine though
>>78283197>i actually am not shit to my friends. i hide almost everything about myself to themso you think. i am willing to bet my life on them feeling very differently than you imagine they feel. maybe you should ask them sometime, you will be surprised
>>78283217which one or is it both? what about clean anal?
>>78283197>this explains it very well...i think i can understand that rush. the thrill of pursuit. wanting and desiring attention, and that release of dopamine when you get it. like starving yourself before a nice meal.>i've never had an fp do something that made me specifically jealous i thinkdo you want to feel jealousy before the whiplash of love bombing?>drinking and swallow various bodily fluids, etcit shouldn't be too hard to find someone into all of this. i find it acceptable as someone mentally ill, but i can see why normies are against it. how come your head hurts?>sadly yea.;. i go through phases of trying to cut him off because i know he will ruin my life (just being around him my brain ruins itself)do you find yourself falling into degeneracy around him? how did you meet someone so compatible if i can ask?>yeah it includes sexual actshave you been able to act anything out yet or has this remained frustratingly out of your grasp?
>>78283255you're such a gross faggot kek
>>78283197>i actually am not shit to my friends. i hide almost everything about myself to them.what does your social life look like? how do you integrate your fp into your social life? do your friends not notice anything?
>>78283004oh no no noHow long have you been making Ame threads/"posts"?
>>78283307im not the other ame chan poster and i dont make threads/post here often
>>78283359what do you think about bey blades?
you sound like you'd make a really good gf for a romantic loser like me. I too want that boundless love where we're both worshipping each other but also want to possess and conquer each other's mind and bodyswitching clothes is really cute, i always wanted a thin and tall gf for that reason. i dont really see where's your problem unless you yourself turn those people away with some unreasonabl behaviour
>>78282372Id love to give you attention but im the type who imprints on people like a baby bird so ive banned myself from making new friends.That said, I hope you get what you need. You shouldnt feel ashamed for your needs.
gimme an ame gf and all our problems would go away
>>78283197>i actually am not shit to my friends. i hide almost everything about myself to them.If I had to do that I would still feel lonely in social interaction, and then it's obvious why you want more attention. Do you have anyone you feel you can be yourself with?
>>78282372you have schizoid personality disorder.off to the next thread to diagnose another cluster A disorder
