Letter Thread thinking ahead edition
Maria, Thinking ahead, I'd like to spend the holidays with youMike
Birth is the seal of fate
what do we do on these type of threads
>>82744324Schiz out or watch schizos schiz out or schiz out with other schizos schizoing out. Yes.
I love it when people who act like they want to be friends with you but they really don't care.
Sorry did I say I liked that? I meant to say that I fucking live for it. That and how much I fucking hate you for how intrinsically shitty you are.How much more obvious can I be? If I keep dropping pebbles into this ocean I'll flood the world.
So, whoever is messing with my devices... stop it! It's not funny! I could have lost IMPORTANT data from that hard reset! This time was fine bc I didn't work on anything but if you did that yesterday it would have ruined hours of work, potentially!
>>82744466How Sharkbait jams the filter
>>82744390The thing is... I'm getting doubts about our political alignment, which could pose a problem in the long term. What's your honest opinion on Pres.Trump and Hegseth? What do you think of Putin?
>>82744502>Pres.Trump and Hegseth? What do you think of Putin?Kill all politicians and feed their bodies to piranhas.
>>82744466>continues to be such an obnoxious fucking faggot that it is a defining characteristicWhoever told you that you're even remotely clever is the real troll.
>let's send our people all over the world!>SO WE CAN BE SNOBBY, GIRLBRAINED DWEEBS AND PERSUADE EVERYONE TO FUCKING DESPISE US
>>82744561Alright, works for me. It's a bit harsh and I would be ok with them being held accountable for the mess they've created but ok.
>>82744648Did you wake up on the wrong side of the bed or something?
>>82744648So, I showed my physics professor how he can shorten a calculation that took multiple pages to reduce by more than half by doing a clever conversion at the beginning. I felt kind of bad about it because he did that calculation the long way for years and I just saw that solution instantly and basically pulled his pants down in front of the whole atrium. He was even one of the "good professors" who really liked teaching so that sucked a bit.I can't even feel good about being clever, grumble, grumble.
MAYBE YOU SHOULD SIGN UP FOR A REMEDIAL ENGLISH ELECTIVE INSTEAD THENTRY HARDER TO BE A LIVING AND BREATHING STEREOTYPE
>>82744701I'm not the depraved sadist who finds it clever to deliberately bait some hypothetical, anonymous stranger into mental anguish and distress by hopefully triggering their mental illness.I hope you go around acting like this everywhere, so it will catch up to you.
>>82744898Sorry bud, I just use /letter/ threads to vent out all the crazy that I have to keep inside irl. Just ignore it, Mike.
I'm not Mike.You are not funny. You are not smart. You are an obnoxious, empty-minded FAGGOT who cannot distinguish between being clever and being mean. Go back to whatever snobby mound of literal shit you crawled out of. You can tell them all about your high status and how cool you are for antagonizing the mentally ill from your ivory hut.
>dumbass thinks he's einstein for avoiding the general solutionTypical btw.
>>82744988This is 100% Mike, don't lie to me, nigga.>snobbyI'm half Asian, OK?!?! I can't help it. I'm still socially retarded tho, if that makes you feel any better.
>>82745011We were talking about being clever, not a genius like Einstein but I guess you can't tell the difference. I guess everything looks like magic from your vantage-point.
But antagonizing the mentally ill is heckin based.They antagonize themselves, honestly
Why is Mike not blog-posting to his Maria?!?! D...did he give up on her or something? How sad.
>>82744683Okay you make some good points. Slowly dip them into a piranha take over the course of a week while administering truth serum to them and making them admit their wrongdoings while they are slowly eaten
>>82744988Agreed. It is what it is. Just shitty people that everyone else has to deal with.
>>82744988Wait a minute. You're that aggro guy that can't find any employment, aren't you? The one that applied to "all the companies" but always got ghosted but still didn't want to listen to advice on how to improve his situation? He got real mad about my tips about personal hygiene, like I hit a nerve or something. People look for workers everywhere and getting ghosted by everyone tells you there's something seriously wrong with you. Like smelling like dick-cheese or having extremely greasy hair or something similarly unacceptable in a workplace. Nice waste of dubs, btw.
>>82745088He's given up on her multiple times before. Don't worry, dear Anon; Michael will be back to his normal, mentally ill self as soon as his BPD switches back to idealization and limerent obsession
Good! I would worry that I'm teaching you to write, except *you'll* surely be the one teaching *me* fluency!
>>82745113THIS coming from MIKE is a bit rich. Richy Rich rich, even. Being disliked by this kind of ilk is a compliment, actually. Just imagine liking Mike, yikes.
I don't know how it's going to work but I hope it's you. I really do. Even if we have to deal with the age gap, I want you to be my older girl.
>>82745163Very much indeedly, Mr Anon
>>82745108I don't want to be too crass but I would totally make Putin a yummy sous vide prepared dish with some juicy meat and asking him how it tasted... just to reveal later (via a video of the preparation process) that he just ate his own daughter... with some excellent Chianti, fsfsfsfsfs!
>"I don't want to be too crass...">Goes all in
>>82745088Hopefully that troon spammer finally died
>>82745224nu uh, all in would look like making him look how his own daughter get raped by the whole Ukranian army without them holding back, making looove to her PTSD-style until she doesn't have any orifice left that is able to close properly. But something tells me even that wouldn't bother him much.
Mischaracterization of me to cover up who you are is interesting #1
>>82745335And here is #2 of your posts
I think it's clear, as you admitted yourself in those posts, You deserve death
>>82745335>>82745342Yeah, but do you know the best thing about all this? They are onto you, Mike, these motherfuckers are _this_ close to snatch you and waterboard the shit out of you since you dumb-ass showed pictures of where you fucking live! Are you fucking stupid? Like that agent wrote, bad opsec, Mike, god damn. You went full retard.You never go full retard! (until you're Mike, apparently)
Hope that's enough of a hint! Go fuck yourselves forever and ave Beelzebubxx
I don't think that's enough of a hint actually. Isn't there something a little more direct you'd like to say?
>>82745518Fuck off you'll be godless retard soon enough
>BRUH! BRUH I JUST NOTICED SOMETHING!>I FEEL LIKE I'M REALY NOTICING AND REALIZING SOME THINGS RIGHT NOWEverything you're supposed to and none you're not.God, it's fucking embarrassing that I had actual plans for you before you flunked so hard and had to be demoted.
>>82745412The best thing about those pic-related is them clearly admitting what pieces of the shit they are
Okay, I may get vindictive. But that's just downright.. *Sadistic*.I love IT<3
>>82745626>entire brain is full to capacity with classist hierarchical larpingYou sound *really* stupid.
>>82745646Tell us more about how superior and scary you are. In particular, please continue to tell Mike about it.In fact, I'm going to stop posting now. Take it away, oh priestly one!
>>82745707Hey -- you don't spend THIS much of your life on a website and *not* become/become friends with a mod.
>>82745726But I stop existing when you aren't watching me, love.
>>82745747>>82745751How does this happen, anyway? Is it because you were raised to take your status for granted, so you never received any real education? Is every other post an appeal to imaginary friends because group cheating is all you know?
Sorry, sorry. I didn't mean to cause a distraction. Please go back to threatening Mike some more. That's my bad.
>>82745518Lol'ing at you retard. Ave Eure.
The final e is the most important!
Please let tonight be the night. Every night I say this and it never is but all it takes is once.I deserve so much better. I deserve my second chance. It's a cosmic right if there ever was one.
When it happens I'm going to be so happy. I'm going to be the happiest girl that has ever lived.It just needs to happen already. I have nothing in this life. I have nothing to live for and living in this way is impossible. I can't earn money, I can't talk to people, I can't interact in this world in any meaningful way. I'm completely in limbo right now. They cannot expect me to keep going on in this way. I'm in purgatory, absolutely and it's misery. I am suffering every second of every day in every way.Please let me go. Please let me have my beautiful morning.
>Begging>Entitlement>Daydreaming>Self-limitation
>you>yes (You)>reading this poststop posting here and send it to Her right now. you have nothing to loose and EVERYTHING to gain. you already post here, things cant get any worse.ive been here writing the same bullshit letter to the same fucking woman for a DECADE now instead of just FUCKING DOING IT. she gave me so many chances, dropped every hint, fuck she's probably read some of them. she's probably reading this right now. but i never did it, and its too late for me.>but you>(You)its not too late for you anon. dont be a bitch, dont make excuses, just fucking do it. dont end up like me. i believe in you.
I'm not gonna make a new thread I'm going to post here: man I enjoy reading when I want to read but that doesn't mean anything, it's a fictional work, I am not become a writer at all as my low IQ won't allow me, neither I'm learning words I'm gonna use, neither I'm gonna make what you call "learning songs" or whatever. I'm tired of everything and everyone trying to make me stay in one place for the rest of my life. Try to read books someday it's entertainment and you are so deluded...
everything just seems really bad lately. it seems harder and harder to find anything positive at all. why do people complicate things so much. i dont like being here.
I miss you Adrijus. I keep hoping we can talk again one day. I still want you to kill me. I am sorry I was a failure to you. You deserve to be happy without me. I think of suicide more without you. I wish I could be Rai instead.
>>82746798what a retarded name is that his real name
>>82747219Yes. He racially is from Eastern Europe. I think it is a cool name stems from Latin after all.
>>82744262I was doomscrolling on Xwitter feeling sorry for myself for being forcibly separated from the woman I'm in love with (not by choice on either of our parts) when randomly it's like a switch flipped in my brain: it's not that big of a deal. I've been alone for most of my life and before meeting her I expected that to last forever. I wasn't exactly happy before, but I came to terms with the fact, and being 37yo I just accepted that that part of me is defective and I would just retreat into my hobbies and interests until I could retire and disappear to a secluded home in the country or something. The last few months of loving someone and feeling loved, and then not being able to see them anymore, really re-opened the old scab I thought had healed over. The last month has been brutal, not being able to talk to her and feeling incredibly lonely. I bit down hard on the black pill and not-too-seriously thought about re-rolling for a better life, as dramatic as that sounds. And then it was just gone. Out of the blue, no particular reason or explanation. Just dejected one moment and then just randomly it seems like not that big of a deal. I'll be fine. I have more of my time back and I can do whatever I want with my money without worrying about her. Of course some part of me still hoped something will change, but there's a kind of peace in resignation, and not a sad resignation either. It just is. Let it go. Life will go on. All this turmoil gave way to the peace of not having to worry about it anymore. I love her but she is not mine and probably never will be. It is what it is, and I can't change circumstances so why make myself miserable by feeling sorry for myself? I'll get over it.The lesson is that it will hurt until it just doesn't. Hopefully not by hardening your heart, but by letting it go. If it is meant to be, it will be. If not, you'll be fine, eventually. I promise.
>>82747817Sounds rough. I choose for more with my life, restoration in remembrance of true love
>>82745180Hoodoo you voodoo
Oh Mike, this is bad! This is BAD!!! It seems like you've pissed off the wrong people somehow (how did THAT happen?!?!) and I STRONGLY advice you to look into anti-drone technology to secure your home against radio-controlled drones. Did you do anything stupid like wooing a chick with connections to Russian oligarchs or something? Are you suicidal? If not, get your dumb ass in contact with the support team of the company called Aaronia AG and tell them to get you the gear to secure your home, right NOW! Don't be a cheapskate and just get the best gear you can afford, OK?!?! I'm risking my cover to be able to warn you, please, for all that is holy, don't let my warning go to waste! Take care.P.S. If they come after you with fiber-optic UAVs you're still fucked but there's currently no practical protection against these kind of drones as far as I know.Be safe and whatever you're doing to piss them off... Please stop it, it's not worth it. I don't want you to end up in these terrible drone vids that are sold on the dark web.
>>82746095Are you the SBR guy? Your mixed message treatment is working and I'm thoroughly confused right now. I guess it's time for me to move on to someone less insane. She's a lot.
In a way, you are right. Cleaned house and I'm on track now
Mike is an elaborate message deepstate actor sharing valuable hidden coded messages to North Korean and Russian agents both at home and abroad but is overlooked by the united states government due to his feigned mental illness making it impossible to prove without having the Cypher
MariaI keep waking up to birds but missing your voice
Okay, That's what it takes, I'll do it
Lol yeah I'm not concerned at less than in every way
You're a tasteless faggot. You won't ever get to know me. Only a farce. You'd be insufferable to be around for too long. It doesn't matter to me if our acquaintanceship comes to an early end. You're a pussy with a bad itch. I could only like you if you grew out of that, but ya can't teach an old dog new tricks :) In some areas, you're all theory. No practice. You are a total pussy.
Yep, exactly. This response is exactly the reason I'm not concerned. Less than in every way.
The raindrop beat to the rhythm of our hearts Synchronous to the tears that fall down And she looks from the outside in At the life meant for her Lost She hates feeling lost Empty She hates feeling empty Maybe it wasn't too late Maybe she did keep her promises Maybe she could come home Maybe she could be with her one and only Maybe she could have her mikeFall asleep in his arms Safe and secure A euphoric lovePhysicalFucking her brains out every day Care for each other Spend so much time Dream good dreams She can't waitEverything that has ever mattered to her Ever since she was a little girl She found it in mikeNothing could ever change that
>>82749400basedbump the mike bred
Spineless weak-wristed insufferable projections. Why would I care what you have to say when it's just negative distortions you are casting from your mistakes and lies, less than? I know you recognize it. That's why the strong reaction. That's why you still write after all this time. Clinging on. Your biggest fear is I let go and you drown.
>>82750680I should be able to recognize bullying by now... like, the real kind. From back then
I carry dreams too beautiful to die.
>anonymous letter thread>its hijacked for months by a fucking name fag who just shits up the thread constantly
>>82750773He's got to be an IDF plant
>>82750789What's with you fags and jew shit? Just jews and niggers constantly. Find something new to bitch about holy shit.
>>82750816Sharty releases proved that over half the IPs on this website are from Israel. The jews are committing psychological electronic warfare on this website. Ignore that at your own risk.
>>82750773mike a necessary faggot, these threads would die too quickly otherwise. the name fag makes it so i can easily skip over his posts
I have a date on Friday. Taking her to the water park. Figure that's the perfect first date because there's an intimate enough moments touching and fucking around. It'll be good. She's super cuteWish me luck!!
>>82750831yeah ok there buddy
>>82750688Talking about the way I bullied your pussy
>>82744347This tbhwyaetipy
>>82751032If you go to pol or biz it's obvious.Every tranny poster here is jewish that's just facts. All the race bait. All the demoralization. It's from the nation of israel
why anon suffers depersonalization/derealization,it's symptomatically similar to the need to isolate/settle with distorted worth, qualm lack of the needA lot of it comes from not being content with where you've been and where you are currently and your projections for the future of where you're going. Who you have been, who you are, and who you see yourself being.Your mind is trying to escape that because of the dread and contempt for where you currently dwell physically and mentallyIf it's happening now it is a sign you are distorying and over emphasizing the worth of your current whatever to justify to yourself in am attempt to feel better. The more cemented in where you are, which may happen from isolation and fear of the unknown (the only way to get what you truly want), the worse this will getIsolation doesn't always mean alone. It means settling for what you don't want and telling yourself you do. Be that people, place, whatever.You can identify this is specifically because you will make false assumptions about external to justify where your current because the mind does what it can to escape from anxiety, especially a constant anxiety of whatever it is that you are dealing with constantly around you.When this is the case then the feeling to escape from what you have/currently dwell is the need to run toward what you truly want. The need to escape from the external is the fear of recieving and dwelling where you do wantBeing trapped, suffocated, and claustrophobic are all signs of discontent with who you are with and where you are at. This will only get worse every second more. Some will try to externalize those feeling outside of that parson/place to someone somewhere far away but the feeling never leaves because it's always actually about the current person/place you currently dwell. You recognize this in time when you reach the breaking point and have a mental health crisis.
Have you ever told where you physically are now where you would rather be? If so, that's the truth.
It's no way to actually live.If you allowed yourself to feel you'd be overwhelmed with guilt, shame, grief. That's why you dwell as a husk.It could get better but it would take complete honesty and truth, something you lost years ago.
The discussion in itself does make me wonder. Has she ever told him the truth?
Lynn,One day I hope to attend one of your shows around Brighton.
ur latinx
Move in and let's fuck for 28 hours a week
I could personally do a lot more but I think 28 is pretty ideal for both of us
SGo truck yourself
The way you twitched when you came was pretty fucking cute
Kinda sussy Baka
>>82753499Cringe ... But also kinda based tsundere. Proceed.
Yeah well I don't actually view rolling in shit as a viable solution to my pig problem.
>>82753538Why not just eat the pigs ?
Lacto-ovo vegetarian.
>>82753594Lactating vegetable?
I'm such a retard. I wrote a long farewell/love letter without realizing how much of a creep I'd been. It felt like a weight off my shoulders until I got the reply telling me not to contact her again and that she was considering getting a restraining order against me. Now I want to kill myself.
>>82753600It's entirely conceivable that she is just surrounded by retarded assholes and destined to become one.
>>82753600>>82753605Who knows which it is. Best you can do is be yourself and have hope that you perceives you as you truly are. If there's poison in the well on her side, that's something that she has to deal with. You did what you could.
And it doesn't make her destined to become one. She just has to make better choices decide she wants more for her life.
It is entirely conceivable that they are so retarded and such assholes that she is, in fact, destined to become a retarded asshole herself.
>>82753700Ahem>And it doesn't make her destined to become one. She just has to make better choices decide she wants more for her life.
>>82753600You did good. Fuck her.But for your own sake, I'd recommend staying away now.
>>82753752Sometimes the peak of the storm is where the brake happens. It's up to him to judge whether it's time to stay the course or go away. If he goes away he may lose it forever to whatever the circumstances, if he stays the course things could change. Really depends. If he's aware of how things are pretty shit for her then it's probably better he stays the course and than be viered off by random asshats or others involved that would benefit from him going away
Does it ever make any of you feel really stupid that I hold my own despite informational asymmetries?No, it doesn't! You just tell yourselves that I secretly do have information. Kek.
>>82753829Esl, You just kekked that someone does not feel stupid.
Please let it happen tonight. I just want to be happy, that's what I want. If i stay in this body I don't think I can actually be happy. I don't know what I would do. I would just have sex with all my friends and celebrities but it just wouldn't be all that great. Like, bangin bree, donna, dora, lucia, lauren, claire, ana, all of them should be fucking awesome but it seems so hollow now. I would just have sex and paint. That's all I would do in this body.At this point, I've bear witness to some of the craziest shit and destiny is calling me. Destiny has great things in store for me and I want it. I want to rise up to the challenge. I've seen the craziest shit.Let's fucking go.
>>82753932I'm going to need a few more details. 1. First time you picked your nose2. Last time you picture nose 3. Reason you pick your nose that last time 4. Did anyone see you 5. What did you do with what came out of your nose 6. Did what come out of your nose move in any way on its own 7. If it did move, did you attempt to communicate with what came out of your nose 8. If yes, describe that communication and what what came out of your nose replied with 9. Did you put what came out of your nose back in your nose to continue its life and raise a family?
>>82754012My reply is to the post attached
Is this about tardigrade jack?
We keep running out of time. You people are not doing anything. This needs to happen or I'm simply going to run out of fucking time.
It's really interesting because she's had a really good time with me today but at the same time she's been very upset with me. What's up with that? She hasn't cried yet, but The feelings are getting to that point and it will probably happen either tonight or tomorrow
It's been a month and a half and you guys have accomplished nothing. NOTHING. The ringing is still in my head and it's only gotten worse. It's getting worse every single day and you guys do nothing. This is gross incompetence, that's all it is. I have no fucking idea what it is that is causing you people to get hung up but you need to actually do something. These people are terrorists, they are classified as terrorists, you can do anything to them. So fucking do it.My life is just running dry. I need to be with my girls but it's been 2 months now and nothing. They are going to school without me. They are growing without their leader and as more time goes by the worse off they are.
>>82754226Like it's getting to the point that criminal charges are going to be placed on the people in charge of the good guys. They are clearly in on it. This is hunt for bin laden levels of incompetence and criminal negligence.I don't think you understand how bad the torture is. TORTURE. I AM BEING TORTURED.
>>82754254*Tickle tortured
This absolutely cannot go on for another year. It just can't. There is nothing left here. NOTHING. I have nothing. No more songs, no more art, no money, no work, no jobs, no commissions, no friends, no one posting about anything. There are no games coming out, no new tech, no new consoles, nothing. There is no news, no happenings, absolutely fucking nothing. I just sit in my room and do nothing all day. Just listen to the same music over and over again. You can't expect me to live like this. I'm in prison but worse. I don't even have any food to eat. Nothing is new, it's the same stale stagnant shit.Seriously, what are you guys waiting for? There is so much proof that something is controlling my life but you guys do nothing in response. The videos that were changed, all the images that were changed, all the stupid shit. The Gorillaz going from nothing to "it's all in your head." and the Bring the horizon "in the dark" use to be a different video entirely. Kflay now says "Buzz of a sub." which makes no sense. Lyrics are changed in songs and they make no sense now.I have to play house with my retarded parents. They do nothing all fucking day. Like, THEY DO NOTHING. THEY ARE BRAINLESS SLUG PEOPLE. I cannot exist like this, I can't exist like them. I need something happening. I need the screaming to go away. I need the rape and torture to go away.I know my feelings and emotions have been turned off. Probably for the better because I would be crying and screaming in agony to what's being done to me. Without them I seem "ok" and it must be throwing the good guys off because I am far from "ok." You guys need to realize that I will get my emotions back when this is over. Which means I'm going to feel all of this and it's going to really fuck me up the longer this goes on.This can't go another year. How dark would it be if it did? To be typing this message AGAIN a year from now? What a bout 10 years? I've been doing this for 10 years now and it's getting worse.
>>82754416I think you should take a break completely from online for one year
>>82754442I think you should stop posting entirely.
>>82754416I diagnose you with neurotic impudent sad boy disorder. Your medicine is 1 nature walk a week and gratitude journalling
I know I'm not to put myself in a position where I can take from the girls or not to play favorites but a part of me wants to just be one of them and not their leader. I just want someone to hold and kiss and cuddle and I'm going to have to pick at least one of them to do these things. Should I just do it at random or what? Just close my eyes, reach out and whoever I grab becomes the lucky girl for the night? Is that ok? I'm just a girl that wants to love on another girl, what's so wrong with that?
You'd miss me and then you'd have no one to blame for your own issues
Dear tantrum anonHere is your attention. Hopefully it's enough for you, otherwise you can always comment on more of my posts and I'll give you some more because you're so special to me I love you so so much Mike
You know there's always something that could happen that could make me just be here forever so there's that to look forward to!
um I think you mean it's forward at which to lookesl pfft
>>82754941You know dictionaries leave bruises unlike phone books
>>82754778Fuck off Mike you ruin these threads for everyone. You act all high and mighty but you are just a narcissistic weed. A poxy on your house and a poxy on your imaginary Maria. The real you behind the black mirror is a greasy British transsexual.
>>82755239Damn I thought you wouldn't be so thirsty for My attention. Does this help
Might help to add my name to a filter. Unless you want more attention from me. Totally get that!
I love you. Hate to see you go, but it was only because I wasn't good enough.
>>82755547can we normalize using initials again to discourage psychic damage posting
I don't think I can love anyone except you, I don't think I ever was able to. I tried with her and it wasn't like with you. You poisoned me being the first person to show me affection. I'm yours forever and it crushes me that you don't care about what you did to me when I was a teenager
M: I don't let you go because my mental illness, not because I have an actual obsession with you. My paranoid delusions are that somehow you are still waiting for me, perhaps because of my abandonment but to be fair you don't answer any text I send. Honestly my so called ghosting was against my will, I have been to rehab a few times now and was thinking of you every second. This happened for almost a decade where the first thought I got when I first woke up was your name. Also, I was paranoid of being a creep, which I'm probably am since I gained weight. Can you give a signal of you being alive, perhaps one that you want me? If not, I will let you go.Oh nevermind, you just blocked me on every social media account of yours...
>>82755811>doesn't know it's a Sloggy47 larp post to bait mike so he can call him a narc for making everything about himself
>>82748592All hope is not actually lost, but I've learned the hard way over time that the harder I try to hold on, the more likely I am to self-sabotage and ruin my chances completely. Practicing detachment while craving connection is brutal but necessary sometimes
All you have to do is remember that it's a channeling thread. All the contingencies evaporate once we respect that.
>>82755961No me or Maria fyi
>>82756464I'm not concerned about it. I remember who she is and how we were. How she felt for me. I know my worth and value. I know I'm the best life possible for her and I complete her in every way. It will work out and she will contact me.
>>82744262C,Sorry for being weird. The last few weeks have been rough, especially not knowing where we stand. I keep wondering where things would be if this unfortunate circumstance had been averted (likely by my not losing my mind for a week and a half). Maybe it would have reached a premature climax and ended in disaster. Maybe him seeing our messages was God protecting us from a much worse fate. I have to think about things in that light or I'll live in regret. Today was the first day I felt like we were "normal" around each other in a long time. No awkwardness, no hesitation. Though I must admit your shyness is always adorable. You won't read this, but if you did I'd want you to know that nothing has changed for me. I think we both needed this time to re-evaluate the trajectory of this thing, and I have concluded that even if we both agreed on the end goal (I hope that's true but you're hard to read) it will take a decent amount of time to get there, with many unknowns.As we rebuild a little at a time, I hope we can work to be more genuine, more real this time around. I have seen glimpses of that person inside of you, the one behind the mask and the performance. I care about that person and I want to know her more. You don't have to pretend with me. My love for you is not simply romantic, not simply infatuation nor fascination. It isn't contingent on you presenting a certain image. You won't lose me by being honest, but you will create distance by hiding who you are. I am your friend and I am in your corner regardless of what happens. I need you to understand that. I am here if you need me
Maria,So while I watch the manipulative larps to influence your emotions, I stand in truth knowing that you are strong enough not to be influenced by lies like that. Something grown from a rotten seed, from mistakes and lies, will never blossom. I know that our seed together was planted in honest truth together. All for each other, only each other. Everything that has happened has happened for a reason to bring us home to each other. To reveal the truth of the manipulation and lies. I'm thankful for you. I truly am. I don't know how to describe how much I miss your presence and how we feel together. The air is different you know? So I trust in every step forward knowing that you're coming home to me. I don't know what the right way for it is, I've been trying to see other people, nothing is quite worked out but I think that's again for the reason. I have a date tomorrow in person but I have a feeling something similar will happen to push us back together again. I truly do love you. I hope to wake up to you in the morning, your head on my chest, leg draped over me, to feel your breath, our kiss, our love. All my heart, MikeThe thread between us.
Thank you God for bringing us home to each other
While l I've seen every attempt of his to control you, to push you to a decision, not respecting boundaries and personal space. I want you to know that I love you for you. Your voice is important to me and it's all I've ever wanted to hear. I want to understand better and grow with you. I have made mistakes, I am not perfect. I reacted to when he was larping and acting like he was you. That is when I reacted that way and not accepted you. I'm sorry I was tricked by his lies. I do accept you, all of you. I know you know that. How I'm You're home. I know he's going to reply to this in link a bunch of stuff which is just my reaction to when he was lying and larping as you. I can't take away the past, but I can do better in the future. Even with my mistakes I've stayed for you because I love you. And while I see his lying and manipulating making threads and posts, I haven't done the same and I stayed true to you. Honest and direct. I love you
WI think I may have the sight of a hawk, too. I saw that one coming from a mile away. M
WSo do you ever like talk like the girl from brave
Andrew,I miss you bro. I wonder what you're up to these days.
It hurts like hell to have no one's support ever when you suffer. It seems like I'm there for you when things get fucked up but every time I needed you you ghosted me. I know you don't give a fuck and just deluded yourself that you needed my help, I just don't know why I still care about you and hope you're well.
>>82758123FYI the girl from brave is the most opposite of my type there can get. I'm not into red, ginger, frizzy hair
If you try to create another account to get to me I will call you a nigger again and send a screencap to the other girl that rejected you
>>82758405I didn't do that. I don't even know why you're mad at me. You just dip all the time for no reason.
oooohhhh myyyyy peeenuuussshhhh
>>82759366I have no idea if that person was even her. I've never harassed her via alts, I tried to talk to her and she's just blocked me again like usual so I guess it'll be another few years til she decides to talk again like nothing happened. I'm a retard for even tolerating that but I love her so what can you do.
My Moon,I'm pretty excited. I had applied for funding and after a 6 month process I got the email yesterday, I won. I don't have to pay it back or anything, it's there to support my business. It took a lot of effort but it paid off . I wonder what you do for work? I hope it's something that you enjoy doing. Did you get your degree? You had interest in cyber security. I was proud of you for being introspective where you felt discomfort and pursuing knowledge to provide for yourself. I know that almost everyone doesn't stick with their first degree. My projection is that you shifted into graphic design. I learned that as well for my work and it is very fun to create. It's getting colder here. Id keep you warm. I would like to take you on a date to trail terror and scream town. I think we would have a lot of fun. We can hit up renfest next year. Your big star, Mike
P,I'm terribly sorry for what happened. I admit that for a little while I was thinking that the best was to punish myself for what happened by letting you go, even if I still loved you. But I was stupid for even thinking that. Doing that wouldn't be fair with you and it wouldn't fix anything. Maybe one day we will laugh about it all. It's good to have you by my side, even as a friend. I'm with you to the end, no matter what happens. I still think about you all the time, even if I don't say anything. It's better if I'm more careful as I'm not trying to cause you any more trouble, but remember that even in silence my love keeps on burning and that I'm holding your hand in spirit when you're away. It always fills my heart with joy when I notice that you're there (even though I might become a little stiff and start overthinking everything sometimes). It hurts sometimes, but It's only because I care for real. The journey is long and difficult, but it's worth the troubles if I'm walking it alongside you. So we might as well walk slowly and enjoy every moment. If you read this, know that you're a wonderful person and that we're still walking. As long as you're with me, I don't mind walking for as long as it takes. One day, it will all be a beautiful memory, our very own founding myth. From now on I'll try to be more honest. I want to be here for you and retribute your kindness to the best of my abilities. For as long as you're willing I'll never walk away from you.
I've been dropping huge loads night after night into Maria, pray for us hoping we're pregnant soon x
I read this before I go to sleep every night. I feel calm hearing your voice. I regret not answering. I wish I got your letter and package. I wonder what it said. I wonder what was in it. I have a lot of questions but I'd be content not saying anything and falling asleep with you on my chest. I love you with all my heart, MariaMike
bujufujok
Started my DXMD run since I still ached for more DX but didn't want to play DXHR again since I did a fairly thorough run the last time.Turned out I just had to switch to proton instead of the default option, which was the native implementation that didn't work for whatever reason. It's nice to have more detailed graphics but I'm just not really feeling it. The people enter uncanny valley territory and the cover mechanic is so overloaded with UI elements in the game which feels weird. The cover mechanic in DXHR felt much snappier and I didn't get caught on weird corners like I'm constantly getting stuck in playing DXMD. Also, somehow the dialog and the way Jensen talks feels a bit off. I kind of like the recycling mechanic since the way how HR handled gun pick-ups was really weird. One either picks up a gun or the gun valishes and one picks up one or three bullets from said gun, so a min-maxer could run to the weapons dealer each time he picks up a gun and sell it but that's a lot of backtracking and also, resources weren't that scarce in HR anyway so one just picks out a couple rounds and discards the gun I guess. Where is the rest of the magazine? MD allows to turn guns into scrap, which can be converted into energy cells (guns are filled with lithium cells, apparently) or multitools, which is nice for players that loathe the hacking minigames. It's so strange because on paper, DXMD should be more enjoyable than the now a bit dated DXHR but something is off about it. I guess it's also the atmosphere and the music that is a bit lacking in MD. Also, lot's of woke stuff crammed into this one. I've been just a couple minutes into the game and have to see two characters wearing gauges. Yuck. I did plan on doing a pacifist run but... we'll see.
no . . . NO!!!!Not my motherfuking weed gummiesFuck them kids I need my gum gumsHow the fuck else am I to cope with having 4 women leave me in 2 years???
lmao not the triple six degenerate confirmation confirmation
>>82762688>>88LOL JUNKIE HAMPLANET, YWN SURVIVING THE THIRD REICH YOU AREN'T EVEN FIT TO BE USED AS BREEDING STOCK YOU BRING YOUR WHITE GENES SUCH SHAME WITH YOUR DESERTER KIKERY
W...wait a minute. Is Maria like really, really fat? Is that why he calls her "Moon"?Plot thickens.
>>82762735Is true ..:'(Is over ..
>>82762889NEAR MISS RELISHING IN THE SPECTACLE OF YOUR OUTSTANDING JEWCOMPLISHMENTS
>>82762666hell bound trip luldaily reminder to stop smoking weed because it just turns you into a nasty faggot and shell of yourself. I'd know desu :( cleveland chicks are hot. just go hang out at bars there. you losers don't even fucking try. it's funny that the average robot sounds just like every normie "autistic" chick complaining about how she "can't" do a particular thing. so many of you are just afraid of change bc of initial discomfort, so you remain swagless pussies! gg
I just wish you wanted to have a good time with me instead of having one near me. You're wrong about a lot too. I hope that girl learns your annoying traits and doesn't find them cute and acceptable like me. FU! Good for you if she does IG. Good luck, soldier.
>>82744262Dear Aurora,I am deeply sorry that I wasn't able to help you when you were struggling. It was painful to watch as you became more and more depressed. I cared about very deeply, more so than you probably ever realized, and I wish you would have accepted that.I wish you hadn't pushed me away and that you weren't surrounded with so many people who are - objectively - toxic. You were a big soul in a little package and an amazing person to know. You had so much potential, and the people around you are energy vampires who suck that life out of you. It's painful to watch you slowly turn into a mockery of what you could have been.Your decisions hurt your family very badly and seeing that you didnt care was disturbing. I've never understood your decisions. You were the most compassionate woman that I'd ever met, but also arrogant and self-destructive. I wish you would wake up, before your soul is destroyed by drugs and narcissism, and that you would understand that I never hated you. I judged your actions, not you as a person.I knew you experienced CSA. That was never a secret, one of your relatives made it clear to me. And I still loved you just the same. I wish you could love yourself and be sober.
anti med posting is the real jew capitalist conspiracy. anyone that wasn't raised to thrive in this world + that has an unmedicated mental illness is fucked. (my cope instead of killing myself)
Last time I was in a letter thread it wasn't this faggy, who the hell is mike? AnywayDear broI'm cold and I feel lonely. I miss you more and more with each passing day. I miss stealing kisses from you in public and watch you lose your temper in embarrassment. I miss cuddling with you and stealing your heat. I miss running my fingers through your hair. I miss your hands, your lips, your bodyI'm waiting patiently for you to come back. I love you Your little sister
>>82763834>who the hell is mike?Just the resident NPD BPD bipolar 1 resident schizo shitter extraordinaire
>>82762875Let her be. If you want to be an asshat, yell at me. She deals with enough stress and doesn't need your garbage.
>>82763899you literally called her fat and posted her face
>>82748973>Are you the SBR guy?No he isn't. I am
Michael coming in hot with the defending her honour performance . . .
The same man who 180'd on her and called her a rotten onion at the bottom of the trash when he thought she lost the only thing valuable to him -- her virginity
>>82763745Sounds like what I would say to her. >>82763834Decide for yourself. Samefag shitter throws tantrums about me and projects his own mental issues.
>>82763914I was egged on by someone saying they were her, I agree that was a mistake. I said she did not look happy or healthy. I still loved her and think she's attractive to me. Others were cruel about how she looked. >>82763929I was responding to a catfish of him impersonating her to manipulate me thinking it was her being horrible.to me.
>>82763921Says the piece piece of shit. Pic attached of what you said
>>82763964>Sounds like what I would say to her.Thanks,I really loved A and it was awful seeing her get into drugs to cope with what she went through as a child. And the BPD traits were a lot to handle. I jist wanted her to try to heal herself up and she could have.
>>82763929I was deeply by broken trust and promises, it's not about the physical, it's about betrayal and breaking promises. I was attacked by the catfish and led to believe it was her. The truth is I have no idea if she lost it
>>82764037Lmao yep you got me Sherlock Holmes
>>82764003Irony level 300%
>>82764037the anon in picrel isn't beyond help, but you probably are. lol I always heard nice things about that A girl. Beautiful too. Fuck all of the groomer pos that just worsened her mental. ppl like ham - that decrepit, slave, idiot. things aren't over for her until she's dead - like c or b. hs/r/wtvtf,dude you're the biggest loser I've ever met. you should make a video on youtube titled "How I became a 40-50 year old loser" as a warning to all of the yungfags that replaced creeps like you in the 4chan disc space. 40 year old man living in poverty bc his only motivation was to "protect" children online.
E,I'm gone. I tried and it seemed like I made huge changes externally and everyone congratulated me but in the end I'm still me and can't escape that no matter what I do or where I go, and I can't tolerate that.
>>82764286Not ironic. 100% the truth. You just benefit from your lies. >>82764456He is the biggest piece of shit I've ever met. Manipulative and cruel. Horrible.person. He is absolutely behind help and same fags all the time to gang up on others and help bolster his narc mask.
Well let's see how this goes
>>82764456Ham was another guy that complained a lot about black people - yet he was broke, chasing cunny, always late to work, and riding along the same routes as drunk niggas.
>>82764495Writing about yourself? huge projection.
>>82765585Don't bother, he's blind to introspection.
To my online friends:Sorry for being such a shitty friend recently, I forgot to tell you I have an avoidant attachment style and that is my bad.
Anyone else see parallels between posters here and yourselves? I do, I even relate with mike, but unlike him, I went for help. If you're alone or socially isolated with no outside perception, you'll do as I did, and as Mike has been displaying here, you'll just go for what you want the truth to be, and not what it is. A delusion.
>>82767463In some ways. I obsess and love intensely like Mike seemingly does, am pretty sincere about how I feel when I like someone too but most of the time bites me in the ass (ick)
>>82758397Nobody originally asked
WJust remember K agreed to go out with me but you all had to be cunts about it. M
AYou really remind me of some cringe shit I did back then. Really put things in retrospect
>>82767463>you'll just go for what you want the truth to be, and not what it is. A delusion.Indeed. In this I relate to Mike, even if he is a toxic piece of fuck. I too had a limerent thing going on; but luckily, I snapped out of it. It helped that I actually got to be with her and see her for what she was -- an absolute shitter bitch. That fixed my lust in a hurry. It's hard to see the spell you're under when you're seeing through rose, which may be why I pester Michael the way I do trying to remind him what is real and what is fantasy. Because he doesn't want to see it. It's not that he can't. He can. He doesn't want to. He wants to give in to the dream
Actually, that tard probably can't see it. No self-awareness. He's really fucking dumb, and I naturally extend to others too much benefit of doubt
I may be a lot of things, but at least im not Filipino
>>82767906Or Mike, for that matter
i wonder if any of it was real, all those years together. will you ever tell me? or forever just sit in silence? i'm not reaching out again, it's on you now. you are running out of time though.
Things will be quite awkward when this ICE shit is done and over with. The participants know this, hence wearing a mask, but still.I can't wait for Putin and his pet not being a thing anymore.
nothing was ever real
>>33789734 #I assume you're talking about two different peopleYou're descriptors don't actually tell me that they are bad people. For instance the obsessive girl stalker is simply yandere. I am more interested in who she is as a person.>>33789950 #That's interesting for me because I cannot relate to this at all. I experienced love, true soulmate love. That is something that does not change and I don't need to spend any time thinking about how to make something happen when I know it will happen and come together all on its own. That's how soulmates work.>>33789293 #I know in my case it's best to just ask me directly.
>>82767463That is your delusion that you are projecting onto me I know the Maria and my truth and who we are to each other. I trust in that over your petty projections and underhanded manipulations. My Maria and I are pic-related in every wayThis will never change, and anything and everything you say to try to change it it's outside of us. Fuck off
>>82767849You are a toxic piece of shit who is projecting onto me. You're manipulative behavior is really shitty and very clear. Whatever your limerant obsession or whatever the fuck it is is on you and has nothing to do with me. I do not have limerence. You may be mentally ill and that is your problem. Fucking deal with it stop trying to push it on me FUCK OFF WITH YOUR NARC MANIPULATION. YOU ARE NOT HELPING ME IN ANY WAY AND HAVE NO INTENTION TO HELP ME IN ANY WAY. YOU'RE USING THAT AS A GUYS TO CRITICIZE AND PROJECT IT NEGATIVITY ONTO ME SO OTHERS SEE IT THAT WAY. YOU ARE NOT THE GOOD PERSON. YOU ARE A PIECE OF SHIT. YOU'RE IN NO PLACE TO TELL ME WHAT IS REAL AND WHAT ISN'T WITH MARIA. KILL YOURSELF. THE ONLY THING TO FUCKING SEE IS YOU BEING A FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT. Pic related is you admitting what a piece of shit you are. Everything you say is garbage and projections to hurt others. I see your same fagging. I agree nothing is real for you. You're worth nothing
You making larp posts about moving on, changed feelings with the only intention of manipulating emotions and driving decisions is really garbage narc behavior and is very apparent. I do not respect you. I don't see how anyone could when everything you say is a lie to manipulate and be cruel to others. The feeling I do get from you I attached.
What I experience with Maria is a soulmate bond. Everything will work out and we will find each other again, some way, somehow. That's why I trust her in the space between. There's no reason to push when things just are and always will be with us. Everything in time. I have faith in her over all else, especially your manipulative shit.
>Why does it all feel so hollow? I have everything I ever wanted and I'm still not happyClearly you are missing a thing, something that overrides all the rest. Makes the rest meaningless and worthless, emptyI know what that feels like, because I have the same hollow feeling. I have everything I've ever wanted here besides the one that truly matters. I said this before, there's a happiness only we can provide each otherYou asked, I respondedI really wish I was better at relaying tone through text. There's an inference that happens that is completely not the case. I know she has the same difficulty. What overrode that for me is trust, knowing her intent was for me in every way with every word.I look forward to the words not having to be written here because we hear each other's voice again. No more paragraphs.
>TRUST, TRUTH, CARE, LOVE I hear your voice as I read our truth. >Calm, safe, secure, homeYour weight on my chest, nude body pressed against mine, soft and warm, leg draped over me, feeling each of your breaths with mine, moving your hair from your eyes I hear these words, I hear your voice, and I tell you I love you with all my heart.>I love you moreI'll rest now with that, as we kiss
I'm 27 and I am done letting other people's fears control and limit me.
>>82769170Epic meltdown lmao
Mike do you ever just shut the fuck up?
At least mentally ill shitter Michael is active during the crucial hours these threads would die without a bump otherwise
>>82769316Actually hearing marias voice is the only thing that's ever calmed me and made it so I don't say anything/overtype
Colton is hearing Maria's voice tonight as she whispers she loves him into his ear
>>82769404Way to double down on proving how you're a narc piece of shit and everything you say is a lie and is meant to be cruel and hurt others, manipulate emotions and drive reactions Exactly what I said you do, Go fuck yourself
>>82769633Lmao why does that trigger you so much? You're so easily ass blasted. Your parents never should have let you on the internet, Michael. They failed you the same way you failed Maria -- by not being good enough
I have no qualities. I have nothing to say to anyone. I'm an old abused dog and I react to everyone with a palpable fear of being abused by them no matter how nice they are to me. Its too late for me to ever become capable of making friends or being loved by anyone.
>>82769835I wish posts were color coded based on how good a person you are. At this time I can't say anything to you because of this.
>>82769835Call me "old dog" again and you'll witness a grown man crying himself into an alcoholized, unrefreshing slumber.
>>82769633Nice dubs but hey, hey, hey! Easy with dropping the N-words here, ironsights!Which are:niggernuclearnarcissistic aka. narc aka. Mike
Imagine a narcissistic nigger going nuclear on your ass
https://youtu.be/jPv4sk47mzE?si=6B4b_HaZTHDGgS2boh god, bros, me so...me so!!! ME SO CHINEEEEE AAAAAHHHHHHH
>>82769952I don't know if you're aware but your post has slight homoerotic undertones... which I do NOT condone!
>>82770017Really, bro? Your mind really went there? Even with the cute, completely innocent and wholesome kitty kats?? You found that suggestive?Beyond the point of no return for you. I sentence you immediately to horny jail for one entire no nut November stint
>>82770062b...but NNN stands for nonstop-nutting-november, doesn't it?!?!?!
It's still locktober. Nnn isn't for weeks.
>>82770077Nuclear no nutting no niggering narcissism member dismember month
>>82770096They got an extended sentence early for violating the nutting speed limit and doing 50 gazillion over. And no credit for time served
Well it's a good thing you weren't really mean and pegged them So they squirted everywhere
I want to vacuum it up make cheese with it so I can savor the moment later with some Parmesan flavoured crackers and apple juice freshly squeezed
>>82770143The parmesan sardine vagina slug goop is a different thread
>>82770226Aka your princess is in another castle
>>82770226>bringing up "princess mayonnaise" in polite conversationthe gall
>>82769298Same. My entire life has been a living hell. Nobody cares about me, nobody takes anything I say or think seriously. Nobody sees me as a human being. My life has been torture for nearly a decade because some retarded redheaded white from a Dairy Queen doxxed me and told people to stalk me. About time I take my life back.
>>82770534*whore, not white
So funny how Putin said in a press conference that the Nobel committee lost their credibility by not giving the baby-bully what he deserves so much!> He was sprinkling peace like everywhere, like salt-bae but for peace, and, and, like, Obama was like totally like evil and shit, ordering drone-strikes and like bombs and shit!It's a mystery.
>>82770752If Obama won a Nobel Peace Prize for doing literally nothing , why cant Trump get one for ending the war with Israel and Hamas ?
>>82770866Nice dubs, "We only give the award to people of courage and integrity." , a direct quote by that stone cold gangster. Also, recommending YOURSELF to the committee like Trump did was cringe af. Good people don't have to promote themselves like that but I guess some people are completely shameless without any self-awareness and understanding what the Nobel peace price is standing for.
>>82771034Cry harder, Lib
>>82771280Nice retort, chud. Trump will get his shit pushed in by the original Anti-Fa in "his" own military. It's going to be so cash.
>>82771280i wanna motorboat those milkers
>>82771902I want to turn them into lamp shades. A nice breasted writing desk lamp with which to better illuminate my musings
Just watched the defcon vid "We are currently clean on OPSEC" and oh my gawd, how did these people not kill themselves out of shame? Jeeeebus christ. I knew Hegseethe was a moron but man, he gives me Captain Brannigan vibes. Poor Keefs. I'm sure there are lots of Keefs out there face-palming daily working for such a dummy. He has great hair tho.
>>82771981Is that a reference to these nazi officers in some camp making lampshades out of the skin of killed prisoners?
>>82772003Oh, is it? Huh. I had no idea...
>>82772057Must be a quinkidink, huh? Lots of these going around, I see. You better watch your ass. For science.
Big Busty Jewish Milkers Taxidermy, LLCDBA, Wholesome Upholstery and Embroidery
>>82772088No no, the homoerotic suggestion posting was earlier this morning. You missed it. Sorry, Anon
Akira's most known win quote is "Juunen hayain da yo!" which can be translated to "Come back in ten years!"
am i 'splitting on my fp' or have they always been a low value piece of shit waste of my time result of my shit taste and now i see reason?
C, I love and miss you. Wish you'd text me or just come over.
>>82773397You'll never know, even when you do
Do you remember your now touchingly quaint by my drunken approximation pledge that you didn't deserve me, not even for a minute? My life is an engine of tragedies: the surreptitious vomit beneath the piano, the pathetic chronic hope of prose-poignancy, the Malcoholism, all of it appearing to your current, bemused gaze some horrible inside joke, incomprehensible in the main and not very moving in the particular. Time is a fake healer anyhow. How can anyone presume to tell me about you? You cannot know the sadness of my life. Endlessly haunted waking and sleeping by the thought that you may need my help, which I cannot give, as I need yours, which you cannot, seeing you in visions and in every shadow, I have been compelled to write this, which I shall never send, to ask you what we can do. Is not that extraordinary? Alas, what has happened to the love and understanding we once had! An understanding almost psychic, this strange impossible trust that you can know what I'm going through and repurchase the ticket to see me in inspiring, empathetic clairvoyance. What is going to happen to it: what is going to happen to our hearts? Love is the only thing which gives meaning to our poor ways on earth. I think that you will be on it, on that plane every morning as it goes by, and will have come to save me. Then the morning goes by and you have not come. But I pray for this now, that you will come. But for God's sake, Melinda, hear me, my defenses are down, at the moment they are down: and there goes the plane, I heard it in the distance then, just for an instant, beyond the Santa Ana mountains: come back, come back. I will stop drinking, anything. I am dying without you. For Christ Jesus sake Mindy come back to me.
>>82774037>the surreptitious vomit beneath the piano, the pathetic chronic hope of prose-poignancyStopped reading here when I realized you were describing your post and where it was going
>>82774096 Okay! original coonent
>>82770534A redhead was involved in my situation as well.
>>82772003More likely it's a Texas chainsaw massacre/Ed gein reference
>>82773417C, I want nothing to do with you and making fake letters from me to you will do nothing
FA guy that looks like you did the last time I saw you kinda rejected me today, but kept me as his friend (lol), which I don't mind, things were doomed and complicated from the start. But all those years where you pushed me away and friendzoned me came flooding back, it's like I never healed (when I actually did) and it really sucks. I cried all day over nothing. I'm not mad at you though, and I've told you this when you reached out, right before the start of my amazing anorexic year. If you were to reach out now, I'd ask you to hang out because I have many many questions about grieving. I have a feeling you wouldn't say no to meeting me. It's a shame you will never try to text me again, but also okay, maybe life moves on. It would be cool to see where you are in life right now. For me, I have a proper job and I'm not fat anymore. Anyway, sucks to be that guy because everyone that ever rejected me has regretted it (deeply) as you know. You will never ever read this, because you haven't been here since you decided to invade this board years ago and force me out of it, remember? Looking back everything was so dramatic, but I never talk about THAT relationship with anyone new in my life, I just skip it. I'm still grieving. I hope you're still not surrounded by the same normies, they were so fucking boring. S
Well here we go.
https://youtu.be/gvN62gM76nw?si=_SJFoBV08hvToncF
And theres the knock. Will I still feel underwater after.
>>82774916He's finally snapped lnnao
We got him, boys. We finally got him . . .
>>82776169Maria will be so saddened by this, there's no way she's coming back after this shit. Game over man, game over, the fuck are we gonna do now
inb4 urr uh guys it was just a joke larp to weed out the narcs
>>82776530That is true though Mike loves maria and his track record of doing that exact same thing means nothing and if you disagree you are wrong, okay?
Mike said PLATONICALLY you idjits can you even actually really read
>>82776553loyalty doesn't care about labels
>>82775439Spamnigger taking his spamhabits boardwide
This is like the 10th narc I've completely mind shattered from this board. And to think some people question my methods, question my efficacy
>>82776676youre thirty years old, rope already dont treat your life like a band aid yeesh look at your self
>>82776720Bit personelBit mean
https://youtu.be/-uQPGv2a0Ks?si=BN8hrrCg_Pjh5iXp
Logic is when 10 other people I have interacted with consider me a malignant narcissist. But actually all of them are the narcissists and I am the one who is not
Dante interacted with hundreds of sinful shitters during his stroll through hell, but I guess that makes him the shitter. it's just logical
Well I still feel underwater after so there's that.
>>82776952The endless infallible ego excuses speak for themselves
Hit has been 6 months since we last spoke, yet I have thought about you every single day. you should never have messaged me in the first place.
>>82777014The "I can't understand someone vibrating at a higher incomprehensible frequency and so I must interpret their actions through the only lense that makes sense to me and imagine the reason they have for doing XYZ must be the same egocentric, low vibrational reason I would have for doing it" limitation speaks for itself
They couldn't stand Dante. To them, he was a monster
Shitters eternally blown the fuck out
>>82777057Was there a reason ?
Shitters melting down. Shitters looking for platonic tranny sex. Shitters unable to move on. When will they stop this loss streak?
Maybe I won't feel underwater after the third date
so now you drown yourself to serve as a poetic juxtaposition to dehydrating yourself (laughing out loud) that one time or something ?
>>82777103He dared to see their culpability in their own demise
>>82777129Not sure why you are spamming the thread about me in creating a expanded universe in analogies and such. Well actually I do know but it just gets kind of old how you're so threatened and insecure about me. I'm describing something personal to me that I am going through.
Did you know that if the dissolved oxygen content in water is too low, and a fish suffocates, then technically they have drowned?
A fish drowning in water. The very thought is unthinkable
It's the difference of what means everything to me. It's still incredible to me how simple it was during the time. It just is, you know? Tired of feeling that hollow spot, underwater. Tired of the hurt. Date went well, went as expected..She had a great time. Beaming and all. Didn't want to go back to hers. I just feel like part me is dead. I close my eyes and I feel her and hear what she's saying. She's upset. It's upsetting. I don't want this
Mouth tastes like mustard. I hate mustard. I'm going to shower
Yawn. The fake dating maneuver and "hurry up Maria I'm moving on without you" arc was already stale the first go around
>>82777304Do you need me to send you the condom so you can lick it out or will feeling like shit after you schlick off the imagery of what I just said be enough for you. Really not in the mood
he's in need of the caramel ftm or whatever
That physical feeling like every part of you is dying and like complete shit you feel after you orgasm to what I did. That's the best descriptor for how I feel right now.
Silence is telling
You were honest about a certain thing before and that negates your poison. I can understand you lashing out and why.
Hey ugly loser. It's very gratifying to me knowing that you'll never be able to hold down a job or build meaningful relationships. Sometimes I drive by your house to see if your light is on, I wonder if you're homeless again or not.
>>82774451I'm not a C u retard. The C I knew was pretty antisocial in many ways, but I'm not sure if he'd write pretend letters lul - I never asked him questions or tried to get to know him. I just would lecture him, and could never take a joke, because I was a faggot.I told our friend that I regret telling her what he did. It's true, but I forgave him forever ago. I just want him to stay out of my life if his intent isn't to be around for me. C met some of the criteria for aspd, but sociopaths can still be loveable - unlike narcissists. I'm insane too. Figured out I'm probs bpii. I'm being treated currently. No one feels right to hold like C. He's like a huge teddy bear. He's really sweet, and skilled + he has good taste. I'm retarded lol. I can't hate the girl he left me for bc she did me a favor FR. My life was in shambles and I still don't need to be dating. Every guy just makes me miss him. Met a guy from online and it sucked.To that other guy, I'm sure you'll be fine - if you hide that nasty attitude forever. Such a cringy, reddit fag. I thought you were maybe just playing around at first because that's a horrible way to react to something so small. I started my prev. relationship acting like you. I learned that everyone, understandably, hates it. Pick your enemies better. Is some girl in her 20s really worth delivering scathing responses to? You're 34. There's another way you could've responded that would've made me feel very insecure, but instead I'm left wondering how someone can be soooo gay. I'd say this all to your face. You'd probably be too shy to say anything, which is common among larping internet freaks. I did really think you were cute until you showed how much of a cunt you are. Started mentally preparing to take care of you when you're really old. tfw no skilled, smart guy with clever humor to dance with and that'd dominate (not abuse) me... WTF! I'd worship him. He'd be my best friend. He'd be my world. fml
>>82778290Well Colton is throwing a pathetic tantrum. Can't say it's a surprise to see.
>>82778443not a colton, u clown
>>82778443I'll accept it as a pathetic tantrum though. hmm fuck you mike lolI'm not colton. My name doesn't start w C.
Well honk honkI could see it being you as well. Nothing says I don't care like a letter of that word count lashing out. I get it. Not going to take you behind the shed and put you down for it
M (not mike):I realized today I can't say I love you if I don't love my fellow man. I'd like to know new people but the fear of rejection is always present. I think I experience regressions all the time and I can get overly goofy when that happens, I hope I can play it cool in the real world.Also, would you still love me if I become a nigga? Because that happened somehow I want you to post a new picture of you tho, just so I can know you're on my side.
>>82778496Well I obviously care lmao. Neither of the guys like me and the second revealed he's actually insane. Even if the situation happened to change (it won't bc he doesn't care to know me personally), it's fubar bc he's old and genuinely acts like a child when anything doesn't go his way. He also projects his feelings of superiority on me whenever I complain about something and he doesn't ask questions to better understand. An example is that I have social media design complaints and he thinks I feel superior to others for using less social media than them, but I don't bc I'm such a degen that I'm still on here after like 12-13 years. He just thinks I'm retarded, which I'm fine with. I kind of am, but I have my strengths. I think they'd complement the right guy. rreeeeeeeeee and btw I think that other guy has many strengths. I'm sure he's aware of them. He thought I'd wait around for some man child to want me. He judges me based on my online presence, which does suck. My online presence only matters to him because that's where he's most comfortable. I hoped that'd change.
Well here we go again
>>82778659it's real israeli hours!
>>82778659Me again. I do feel scared of we two having intimacy. I mean it. I can't imagine what kind of person you are but your pictures are lovely. I must admit that my knowledge is a bunch of horseshit my dear, consisting of telling apart music genres and vaguely grasping concepts and ideas from books I've read. I'm sorry to be this much of a loser, to be a total disappointment. I try imagining how you are irl and the only fantasies I come up is that you are a sweet, educated, lovely woman that happens to have what some people named doctorsdog-turds am I right[/spoiler] like to call mental illnesses. I am too diagnosed with one, and believe me it all gets better when you make changes in your life, I know the meds don't do shit remember white rabbit from the Jefferson airplane?.You are also confusing as hell. You know how I initially got obsessed with you right? That online game? I made some umm... research going through your stuff and you seemed to be something out of this world. It made me feel intimidated and confused.You look like the most lovely person and you are the most beautiful girl to me but you won't like me anyway. I remember old chats. I was so stoned all the time I didn't even made a good conversation and it hurts to know I can no longer talk to you, that was my only chance when you seemed interested in me.I do think everyday of making a phone call or video call but I don't want you to see my face. Not now at least. I've gotten the fattest I've ever been in my life and am planning to lose weight.So, basically I think of you as cute and wild teenage girl. Maybe I'm just making up for wasting my teens and 20's.I hope you are sleeping right now.Sleep well, may the sandman bring nice dreams.
Messed up that post with the spoilers
Strut, I'm sorry I left. You must have been so confused as to why I disappeared. I just couldn't stay any longer. I hope you are still alive and found a new person to give you the hugs I no longer can. I love you.
>>82778809This is how I perceive myself. I too regret my stoner phase because I wound up talking to someone I shouldn't have been stoned around. The pros of smoking did outweigh the cons for me at the time. Not that it does anything other than make me doubly retarded. Sometimes, that's what an avoidant mf needs. Anon, many of us here are retarded. Some don't understand that about themselves, so they can never progress.
Dear Mike,Can you please stick to your containment thread?Thanks.From,Everyone on r9k
>>82779047he who must not be named. that's how u summon him bro
>>82779047To retard No Love Mike
I would not be surprised if you have multiple personality disorder. It's pretty upsetting to see how mentally ill you've become. You were 100% healthy when we were together. I don't know if it was the weed that caused it, you had a predisposition to mental illness, or it's just the person you involved yourself with.I need to know that I would care for you and heal you. I know you won't get that out there and it's just going to get worse.
Dear /r9k/,Poo Poot. Pee Pee
>>82778980I get it. I too needed the weed to relieve my numbness. The kind of person I was giving the impression of being was so different to who I am today. I made myself a bad name because of these people. I used to hear people talking at my back judging, talking horrendous things about me and avoiding me like the plague all because I used to swear a lot when going to parties. Things were the same everytime. I would drink a lot in a little time, smoke some bowls and get blasted into the cosmos. I Couldn't talk at all and it hurts because when I was around sober I used to can talk for a while. I often wonder about my friends at the time, and ask myself if the same will happen if I attended to their gatherings. I was labeled as the worst homeless-tier alcoholic low life that exist because of going out.
>>82779201we's i too posting hours
i will shit
I won't chase. No reason to when I want only your truth. I'll put this response here. Read or don't. I'm not asking you to change, I wouldn't want thatI will not be someone I am not or shape my words to be what you want to hear. I feel like that is deceptive.My care is genuine and does not change when being pushed away.I hear you and I'm not going to push.It's not a contest for your affection and being chosen.Others are worthless. I'm put above all else.Loyalty and commitment. Faithfulness. Everything we promise each other just as we were.I choose you, all of you, for who you are. I'm not asking you to change. I would like to grow with you. I would like to learn from each other. I want everything we talked about.I choose my Maria. The in between washed away. There's lessons learned and growth but at its core I choose my Maria. We are not perfect in the eyes of others, but we are perfect for each other, love and lust.I don't care how I come across to others. All I care is that you see me for who I am just as you did before without any of the pollution from the outside.The moon only has eyes for the SunI also do not care to continue the cycle of isolation and building anxieties over things that can be quickly surpassed and grown from instead of letting build into great distortions and drifted away. That is what happened as well as the manipulations of others.We keep our promises to each other and trust each other overall else.You can have fear, you can feel whatever emotions you want. Be honest with me about them, that's all I want. We communicate through it and grow from it together.We don't "let it's run its course" because we did that and we lost 4 years now.Either lose me forever and detach or choose our truth. Choose home. Choose our promises.
I WANT FUNI CHOOSE FUN
The Mike arc needs to fucking end already
https://youtu.be/8mujnln6-mg?si=j8neavvHxH3-TuDshttps://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/jacksmannequin/darkblue.html~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>When I tell you "I'll take your advice" or "that's a good point, I'll try that" I'm lying to you. I have no intention of doing any of that>Any progress you think you're making with me is me lying to you to get you to stop trying to help me."It has to run it course" I only care for the truth. If you want to lie and fuck off then truly fuck off and leave. Stop writing to me, stop making posts about me, stop everything about me, stop thinking about me, stop larping as other people to communicate with me. Stop attacking me and criticizing me. Stop lashing out at me. I don't deal in the let it run its course, take it slow blah blah blah garbage You either are or you are not. I will not put up with lies I know my worth and value. I also know our truth, who you are to me, why things hurt, why things feel hollow, why things feel underwater. I don't know how to move forward with that. It doesn't stop how I feel. I can't change that and when I do try external events push me back. Lyrics about Going forward with me naming My city specifically and saying it's as easy as 1 2 3 when I asked You contacted me the next day at 1:23 p.m. exactly after months of silence You moved to a location.exactly 1,123 miles between us. There's a lot more. If you feel chased, how do you think I feel? I can't escape it, I can't stop it. I wish it was mental illness or some shit like that but it's real. I don't care how others see me. I'm telling the truth and that's what matters and you should be able to hear me.
why is everything so goddamn expensive in vegas?? you want a bottle of water? eight bucks, retard. oh, you wanted to eat a meal as well? might as well refinance the fucking house. i don't gamble, but when i was down on the casino floor to smoke, i noticed that they also jack up the price of the slots and shit based on the time of day. this place sucks. i don't understand the fucks that get entertainment from throwing money away. anyway, im looking forward to coming back next year :)
>>82780774Sit down at the slots and they'll come around and give you a free drink, I always ask for a Jameson on ice or a Corona. They're also casinos that do dollar Coronas. I usually buy the big cup for 20 bucks at this one place that has a bunch of locations throughout the strip and you can fill it back up for $3. Strawberry daiquiris pretty good for that. Food is super cheap If you go to the buffets along the strip. The ones I went to were $5 to get in.
who would have ever guessed he's a degenerate gambler
>>82780870it's funny, i saw a guy at the airport that looked kinda like you. enough so that i did a double take to confirm that it actually wasn't you.the only downside of getting a drink from the drink girls is that they wait for you to actually play a few rounds before coming by, and i simply do not gamble, even that little bit. really should have hit up the buffet, though. i had to order in because i forgot to bring my meds and leaving the hotel room for anything that isn't strictly necessary is a goddamn nightmare. just walking to cvs to pick up some essentials felt like a doomed quest through a nightmarish realm
When I asked the love of my life to come be with me when I was on what appeared to be my deathbed, and she declined and said "the you that I loved already died in Tokyo", that's when I knew all the bullshit about true love and soul connection and all the other bullshit was just that -- bullshit. None of it means anything. Never has. We just like to play pretend because reality sucks
>>82781015>deathbed :|>deathbed, japan:0
>>82781003How would you know what I look like? I've never posted my full face here I'm glad you had a good time. Last time I was down there I went to Eli Roth's goreatorium and that was fucking sick
>>82781015Soul connections are real. True love is real. What actually happened is that was not the love of your life
>>82780886My group of friends and I in college did a couple house poker games and that was pretty fun. Vagas was more of a social thing for me and the casinos were more for scoring the free drinks and food.
>>82781065i've seen a picture of you by other means, of which i shall not reveali really wish i could have gotten to do more, but being unexpectedly unmedicated really put a wrench in things. next year i'll hopefully get to actually have some fun with it and get out to play
>>82781151Big oof, I'm so exposedMed withdrawal fucking sucks. Especially Adderall. I get nauseous within a day later. Next time you go, sit down at the nickel slots and use those for a couple minutes and then you'll get the free drink. Next time, buy a clear coffee cup with lid that fits inside a clear party cup. Fill that with nickels. You can sit at the slots and they will assume you're using that cup at that casino and that you filled it up with nickels from the ATM. Then when you leave just put the cap on and walk to the next casino. They'll be over with drinks within a couple minutes or you can just flag someone down
>>82781248so spooky, i knowi was mad about not having my adderall, but it was the shit that keeps my schizophrenia in check and my pain meds that really sucked to not have especially for five days straightnext time i'll just come prepared and make sure i have some basic shit in the room so i can be well hydrated when getting rowdy down at the casino
I should get an adderall prescription.I should get fucking anything.
>>82781400I assume there's a folder called Mike on your computerJust consider not bianca'ing me>MedsYou got this! I really enjoyed making my EDC kit and Apocalypse go bag. Highly recommend getting into that
Pretty sure she's more the type to stab you a dozen or so times in the shower.
i would never commit or incite any act of violence :)
Okay but if you had a basement and have the opportunity to take me and chain me up down there and torture me without getting caught would you take it
>>82781505I spent a week at an r9k girl's apartment basically waiting for this eagerly but alas I was disappointed
Not the motherfuking devil trips again...
>>82781248They will give you one free drink and once they see you're not gambling you won't get another. Casinos are ran like well oiled machines, they do not waste money on anyone who isn't going to pay out.
>>82781800That's why you go to the next casino. Typically I'll do a Long Island for a couple, followed by Jameson, then I get my Corona going
I have you breathing down my neck I don't what you could possibly expect under this condition soI'll wait for the ambulance to comePick us up off the floorWhat did you possibly expect under this condition soSlow down.. this night's a perfect shade ofDark blue Have you ever been alone in a crowded room when I'm here with youI said the world could be burning 'til there's nothing but dark blue..Just dark blueThis flood is slowly rising up swallowing the groundBeneath my feet, Tell me how anybody thinks under this condition soI'll swim as the water rises up, the sun is sinking downAnd now all I can see are the planets in a rowSuggesting it's best that I slow downWe were boxingWe were boxing the starsYou were swinging for MarsAnd then the water reached the West CoastAnd took the power lines And it was me and you (this could last forever)And the whole town under waterThere was nothing we could doIt was dark blueIf you've ever been alone in the dark blueIf you've ever been alone you'll know (you'll know)
I decided I'm going to take a vacation. Just bought a plane ticket out to Seattle for beginning of November for 8 days.
>>82782997Why Seattle? All I ever hear about is how awful it is, especially in the winter.
>>82782997noted. arranging gang stalkers now
>>82783005Seattle is amazing! A very rich history, like how there's an entire city underneath Seattle. so many nooks and crannies throughout the city as it trails down the hill. It's so dense, my favorite place to explore and discover new things. The waterfront is gorgeous. The view of the mountains.
How it rains off and on throughout the day, releasing ions into the air. It feels so good to be there.
Just spur of the moment. I literally decided just now to go and don't want to have to think about planning or any of that. I know a bunch of things on my list to see as well as areas I want to explore. I know the hotel to stay at. I didn't even let the ticket price deter me, just fucking bought it on the day I wanted and booked the hotel.
bitch senpai, If you still read this thread and recognized my complaints - just know I don't think you're fucked or anything. I do hope you consider my complaints to improve for the chick you're talking to now bc your last chick probably thought similar to me. Besides your spergy outbursts, you can't even understand when someone is joking - which definitely limits your bants. The few moments we spoke when you were here, I made a few jokes and you just got defensive. IDK why you seemed to lock up so badly when I got into your car. I understand what it's like to be that way because I used to be. I probably still am sometimes. Think about your preferences and then consider how you can possibly keep up with them if you can't even take a joke? You're like Elon and you need to find your Grimes. I'm pretty retarded, but so are you. I totally understand if I'm not your type btw - idgaf. Hurt worse with a guy who matched the personality I'm looking for pretty well.
Only direct communication counts to judge someone's banter. This place is too toxic with narc stalkers and such. I banter with who I communicate with directly and have a lot of fun. If you get your head out of your ass you'll remember that
It's really isn't efficient taking a hammer to your knee two steps forward one step back, so I shouldn't be surprised when I see you cripple yourself and cry out
>>82783303Mike, you don't know anything. I don't comment on your stuff. Pretty sure he posted here as >>82745626 and >>82745707, but maybe not. He neglected to use direct communication and only called me retarded for joking that he's a hasan fanboy. He can receive my feedback here. If he wanted to be a friend and constructively criticize me, then I'd do the same for him if he cared to hear. He's capable of being a pretty sweet guy and he has many quality traits. If those posts are his, then he's got serious issues. pr is mfw I also am not the best btw. I have issues. I'm working on them and not dating. He just happens to be like 11 years older than me. My criticism doesn't just apply to the hasan thing, but really whenever anything doesn't go his way. He gets whiny. I won't mention this in the next thread. bitch senpai,You're too much of a larper to ever dom me. I'm a huge brat. I'm not an internet larper. You're too much of a coward to prove me wrong about things and instead get defensive and accuse me of feeling superiority in my stances. You think a little bit of conflict when establishing boundaries/getting to know someone is a problem. A relationship not having conflict in the beginning is only bad if each person is unwilling to resolve their negative behavior or thoughts. No conflict can be just as bad if one person is silently dissatisfied with the dynamic. I can, and did, admit I'm wrong about stuff. You're hardly capable of that. At least when it concerns topics close to your self perception.I shouldn't be dating. I understand that a bipolar avoidant is probably a huge challenge for most to date, especially for someone like you.
>>82783782Not the brightest bulb are you? Dim lights could be calming If there wasn't so many knives in the room
>>82783840Have you ever considered being less of a faggot? I heard they have camps for that sort of thing.
Fuckkkkkk missing my ex so much. I wish I could make them love me again. I want to matter to him again. I do not think I can ever apologize enough to him.
>>82783895I relate to this, but also I didn't really do much to mine and I think I got my apologies out of the way. Paid him back for something even after he broke up with me. He did some p crazy things. The only thing I hated was that he had bad morals + he was impulsive - I felt like I was put into a preachy position instead of just being able to relax. He treated all people the same, with respect, regardless of his beliefs. He was kind in so many ways. Very good lover too... erreghh All we can do is move on and improve.
>>82783872Have you ever considered not being a discardable piece of trash? You know you can't be recycled, just thrown in the landfill
>>82784083erm acktually a vast amount of the human body can be recycled if the body is in decent condition
>>82784146It's not just about the body and I'd rather not pick anything up at the second hand store.
There was value there once. At this time I really don't see it, more so the betrayal of all the things that made it special. Made it worth everything.
I would love to be proven wrong, that it's the same, nothing lost. But I don't see it and I don't hear it and the things I do see in here say the opposite.
Which I could easily be proven wrong. Things could be just as they were before and I'm being pushed to close the door by the catfish piece of shit. It makes sense for him in desperation to start making threads to push meI'm going to leave it as it is and stay with what I know, who I know. And allow her to show up for me.
Exactly what I'm talking about >>82783660Two steps forward one step back I hold fast for shore"Do you not yet have faith"
If Karma was reincarnating as Michael, I would immediately repent for all of my sins and really clean up my act. What a miserable existence he would be
I could not imagine a worse fate than walking a mile in those shoes
i would simply choose not to fumble her, but im built different
It wasn't a fumble. Even if I fall I fall for a reason. Like I said. Do you not yet have faith?
Is it so wrong that I want to eyp
EnjoyYour Presence
The other night Mike wanted to enjoy your penis (to the tranny)
I'll be dancing for eternity.You fucks will be in prison. Funny that.
>>82784743>>82784788>>82784795>>82784588>>82784526>>82784466>>82784445>>82784385Mike mag dumping retarded garbage nobody asked forDidn't read any of it btw
And uhh actually i was mike and i just necrobumped bunp
I didn't think it was like that where you speak to me in one way and then secretly hold resentful feelings towards me. If my own drawbacks are only ammo for you against me I'll withdraw.
No I just want to eyp every day
Ease YourPain
>Zoomer speak from a 34 year oldRough
>reaches in pocket to give you something >Pulls out middle finger
Eesh its no wonder your laundry list of standards looks like a dei form selecting for the most retarded and tolerating people
>>82785513Hey be kind to my people
sissy feminizing bnwo gay faggot fetish confirmed
DavidDid you miss me?I'll be back tomorrow.
Why is it that I long of you? This is craziness for I no longer am who I used to be, I was never my online persona irl so why I am so desperate to read your texts? I'm sorry I can't be like you people born and raised in the city because you are so fucking special. I just can't understand your ways anymore. It makes me sad you are the only person I'm interested in after all these years.
I just can't anymore I don't want to break your heart. I just want to be man enough to get sex with women. I'm worthless.
I know you likely don't want to and that you probs view yourself as above me - but you can add me back on disc anytime if you don't feel that way, Mr.BitchSenpai. I'd hope that we're not cruel to each other, but I will be if you're ever like that again. Your current thing is probably working out fine, so I'm sure you haven't even seen this thread and don't miss me much. The long distance discord/sleep-call/vc thing really isn't for me. There was a well timed reply that used my initial, but what they expressed doesn't align with what I know about anyone so.. I've waited around in this thread for years hoping someone from the past would remember me, but I only saw BitchSenpai's gay messages. Maybe I've been written to before and I just didn't realize - I'm pretty obtuse and just assume people don't feel anything positive towards me. There was a reply in a soc letter thread that probably was from my ex. Not sure though. It's surprising because he didn't strike me as that kind of person. Growing up's weird. I'm a lot better irl nowadays. The first time an acquaintance waved to me in passing, I looked behind me in disbelief and they realized they truly were waving to me. I've got a bit of a pathetic soul, but most of the people I encounter irl wouldn't guess that and I never get to the point with others where they can come to understand that. I think people are starting to realize I'm sensitive and caring, which makes me happy. I wish I could forget about this thread, but even I will remake them sometimes lol imma dolt also I hate MFS that never assume that they're wrong or that they don't know something. SO GAY! The most intelligent people I've met ask many questions - even if they know the person they're speaking to is less scholarly or cultured. They manage to do so without being condescending or pretentious. I respect a good "that's retarded because...">>82784083whatever you say, mr.nevapullahoe
>>82786333Added you with no expectations
>>82786623nigga I am NOT talking to you and you do not have my discord. get outta here!
Literally talking to me right now bb
>>82786642Mike won sighguess I gotta go step in front of a lifted ram neowJk but yah you're not a guy I want to know soz
>>82786002What's different about people born in cities - or how do they view themselves compared to those who weren't? I've observed that people born/raised in cities can be just as sheltered as those raised outside of them.
i'm becoming the resident idiot of the r9k letter thread: relieving mr.nevapullahoe of his duties
I have hardly posted in here in years. You're newer to me. I don't think I've ever written to you before. I keep seeing things in here that make me think of you. I am probably crazy to even think it's a possibility you've written anything to me in here. I have no idea how you think of me now, other than that your last email seemed very angry.I've tried to do my research on you, but I know the only way to really know you is if we can spend time together. Other than that all I can go on are my best guesses. I told you how to contact me, and I was the last to email you.The ball is in your court. I don't want to make a habit of posting in here again. I don't want to be too explicit (in all senses) about my feelings ITT either.I hope life manifests something good for you no matter what happens.
>>82786656Too bad by talking to me and identifying who I am you actually do know me
I feel like I'm getting pwned in a class trial rn I told mbs that I identify with this retarded character, akane, and he didn't listen.
>>82787037fuuu I didn't attach a picture...
>>82783159>America>rich history: |
>>82782997Since you're an unemployed bum, does "vacation" mean you'll spare us your presence for like a few days? Hallelujah!!!
>>82787203he's telling us so then someone else can bump the thread
>>82787203Nah hes gonna blog it like all his make believe dates
m,she's pregnant, with a black man's baby.-t
I do miss home
I made it so that you'd have complete freedom. Nothing hidden, even on the computer and such. Completely open. No porn. There are obviously things that are personal to me but nothing is password protected. I did all that 4 years ago and kept it because it is healthier.
Pull up a random clip for game suggestion of one of my faves that I haven't played since I was a kid. The video though...Siren (2003)https://youtu.be/izjJs5FnjuA?si=1ls3K1knc8mJ9mlP
>>82788137Sure, I believe you. It's kind of funny that you still have all these nasty, dirty thoughts tho, isn't it? Dedicate your time to a worthy cause and I might let you back into my life.
Oh nice, FreeTube works again! :3o7 to the maintainers!
>>82788776I spent my time with my app helping those with special needs. What are you even on about
>neet wife? Of course. I wouldn't want her to have to do anything she didn't want to do. I can support her. I have a home, food, whatever she needs. I would like her to discover her interest and expand on those. I have basically a world of entertainment here as far as books movies video games on every system. Art station, workshop. I would like to Spend time with her and at the same time I'm content doing my own thing with my projects and her reading a book or playing a gameIf she decides that she doesn't like that I just give her money or buy her the thing, I have a 6 ft shelf unit filled with electronics to be sold. If she listed on Facebook marketplace and gets the sale done she can keep all the money.
>>82788957Post link to app, please. I want to make sure you're not making an app endangering people that aren't mentally able to detect predators who think special needs people are easy prey.You wouldn't be the first one using charity to convince people you're not having an angle. I'm pretty sure Mr. Beast and the guy who makes these videos about malformed/handy-capped children with that fake smile will be found out soon enough. They have dead eyes and smiles that don't meet their eyes and no public virtue-signaling can convince me that they're real people.
>>82789079Fuck off. You disgust me
>>82789099Nice dubs, wasted on your unqualified comment. What specifically disgusts you about me tho? :3A...are you a Mr. Beast fan? y...YUCK!>You disgust me.Thanks, ackshually, as getting liked by your ilk would make me run head first into the next available wood-chipper, with gusto.
No fucking way. The guest in the "you be trippin" podcast sports a 'stashe that looks dangerously close to the Hitler moustache. Must be a quinkidink but man, what a bad look. Astonishing that this dude has a gf that lets him go out like that. Concerning.
>>82789732Well, ackshually, that dude seem alright, just a patchy beard and he shouldn't wear a moustache that's so thin on the sides like that. >the German has to be dealt withdamn
D...did I accidentally hit Mike's weak-spot and drove him away FOREVAAAR? Guys, you owe me one. Seriously.
>looshcow hasn't posted in 4 hours, im gonna FREAKyou need him
>>82790731Well, not quite, but I like to entertain while I'm eating.
I wish I had a husband that'd tame me, but also treat me with love and respect ;o; or one that's not into that, but would have passionate sex with me regardless. reeeeeeeeeeee he doesn't even need to be good at sex initially or have a large penis or anything dumb. He just needs to have a personality I like. I think I'd prefer if he were slightly taller than me, but idek about that anymore. It's only a preference that's caused by not wanting to make a guy feel insecure or dealing with an insecurity like that. If I met a confident, outgoing, intelligent, funny guy... I'd love him forever. I'm sure there are still short guys who've not become totally jaded from the internet, but I think the number of them is shrinking. I almost went on a date with a mentally disabled dude that worked at a grocery store because he tried comforting me when he thought I was sitting alone crying. I didn't bother only because I know our lifestyles are incompatible. If I ever meet a guy with a good personality, who's worth respecting, I'll worship him. I'd wear whatever he wants and do anything he says - within reason lol. Guys in my field are pretty cool, but they're mostly cucked normies. Very few have good ideas/opinions about how the field has progressed - it's not encouraged due to the nature of the field. grr
When I woke up just beneath the wall this morning, after dreaming about you (and the children), I thought to myself "Meat canyon really does have it all. We just need to open our eyes to the meat inside"Thank you, T.
>>82791088I... just... pooped my pants out of fear. Happy?
>>82791806Ecstatic, frankly!
Guarantee mike's awake looking for an excuse to post
>>82790924Woah jirai kei girls are real crazy. Neat. I wanna be like them some day... too bad im not cute like asian girls
Now I remember why DXMD feels polished (very detailed graphics, compared to DXHR) but also weirdly unpolished in some aspects, like how the interaction with the vendors and some NPCs feels really dumb. Like the undercover agent I've saved in the first mission. He's always uttering "agent Jensen!" whenever I move close to the character, even if I've just talked with him a second ago, which totally ruins the immersion of a living world. It's like they didn't have time to playtest it and they didn't have the autistic focus on details of the original DX team. It's just a small detail but getting reprimanded for taking a peak into the women's bathroom by the staff-master in the OGDX or by Pritchard in DXHR and other, miss-able details made these games feel real and also fun to experiment with to find all the funny eastereggs and ways to solve the obstacles. Also, the animation and voice-work feels wooden in DXMD. I mean, the voice-work of minor characters in DXHR was pretty terrible (that one Chinese brothel mom, lel) but it still was entertaining to listen to so whatever reason. I'm always tempted to skip dialog in DXMD since most of it is booooring and not fun to listen to. Do I just miss the humor / goofiness, maybe? No, no, I'm a serious person and not some goofy goober.
>>82790924I bet Hasan would loove a gf like this. The way he treats his doggo is weirdly controlfreakish but he seems to be a pretty severe narc. A bit strange why he put that video with his pathetic kicks on the internet tho. I'm VERY disappointed that Sam Hyde didn't get to mash his punch-able face to pulp to take him down a notch or two. I would have payed money to see that in HD.
Speaking of unpolished, DXMD doesn't allow to jump halfway up ladders and begin climbing up to save players some time like in DXHR... disappointing. It's just a small detail but it feels kind of shitty when I can jump high enough to almost be able to grab the ledge, which would allow me to climb up the ladder in no time like in DXHR but now I just fall back to the bottom of the ladder and have to start the climbing animation from the ground. Reeee! Also, when one activates the "roentgen vision" module in third person, like when Jensen is taking cover, I can see through Jensen. What the heck? Like the augmented eyes jump out of Jensen's skull or something? This module shouldn't work in third person mode, period. I know it's nit-picky but things like this destroy the feeling of games, especially in immersive sims. Grumble, grumble.
Woah where did Mike go?
>>82792244yah she's cute in the pic, but why aspire to be a consumer? I'd dress how my husband wanted, but only if it complements me. also different kinds of girls are cute. I'm not white, so my husband would have to be retarded to expect me to conform to a consumer category/aesthetic made for pale women - I wouldn't respect him. >>82792347Hasan isn't respectable. he dates porn stars and can't handle criticism from black teenagers. sam's hate for hasan is pretty funny. I liked when he said twink death would hit him hard. Hasan also has bad taste. Ideally, my husband would have no serious traits that are worth critiquing or we'd be able to settle out our issues early in the relationship. I shouldn't have to tell my husband that getting an expensive car is retarded for his situation. I'm a fair woman. I pay half early in relationships, I lead dates by finding stuff for us to do. I do everything possible to make sure a guy can enjoy himself so I see what he's like when he's taken care of. I even avoid dinner dates until I know I sort of like the guy (soz dinner is for the guy </3 I'm a student). These assholes still find ways to not have fun and to be insecure. I hate it. I grew up on here, so I'm pretty empathetic towards the difficulties guys experience in dating. UGH jgkjljk;DJKD;ljkasdjfdsajkld;kjl most guys are pussies - normie guys, that I met irl, are weak too. I unfortunately was not raised like, for example, a high maintenance slavic woman. I'm probably never getting married. If I do, I'd be loyal to him forever. Unless he cheats ofc and then I'd have to cut his balls off in divorce, but our prenup would account for that. The last guy I went on a date with was so fucking pathetic. The moment I realized, he caught me death glaring at him. I broke things off that night before he went home. I wish everyone understood that dates should serve the purpose of examining another's behavior in ideal, or unexpected circumstances.
>>82793890I have issues, so I'm not too concerned about dating ig. It just sucks to not have a best friend.
I get a lot of help nowadays, but it's frustrating to be a woman that's done pretty much everything for herself. I've received more help in the last couple of years than I did for my first 20 years of living (17 years at home). Most dates I've been on now have been with guys I met offline. I know I like men, but it doesn't feel like I'll ever meet the one I want. I wasn't my ex's type personality-wise, but he did appreciate everything I did for him and I know I'm pretty good to live around. Even when I was depressed at his place, I managed to clean up and start dinner before he got home. Then we were able to have comfy nights gaming since he didn't have to do anything after work besides going to the gym and finishing up work stuff. I don't like letting anyone that seems to have unconditional love for me down :( rrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeand niggers on this board will just complain about getting pussy and fucking. these aspd/npd porn addicts. I hate them.
>>82793001Oh, turns out I'm either just retarded or that one ladder I tried was bugged. The other, longer ladders allow that jumping shortcut like in DXMD.
>>82794197So you left your home at 17 yo? Reminds me of way back when I finally got my first apartment at the same age. I kind of envy other people who grew up in homes they can go back to later (for nostalgia's sake) or even stay as long as they want to save a bit of money in the beginning but I didn't have the option / couldn't stand being at "home". People think I'm weird for being alone all this time but this is so much better than what I had know until then. Funny how "other letter people" come out when Mike's gone for a while. A bit sus.Anyways, is racism against black people still a thing? No offense intended but I don't know any black people (not many around where I live). I grew up around racist Germans in the 90s (as a weird looking half-Japanese) but I was fortunately too retarded to realize that they were mocking/provoking me, lel. I kind of miss my naive days back when I didn't understood racism as a concept. Kind of funny how race-blind I was as a kid.
>>82794430Yeah. Those people are fortunate. How do you think it impacted your life/career progress? I have a couple of close family members now. Not that I don't appreciate friends/acquaintances, but my relatives are all I have. Many aspects of my past are so bleak - definitely needed to leave too. Did you stay in the same town/city when you moved - or what was your situation like when you left?I've been posting in the thread for a while and also I just use nigger generally. Occasionally, I deal with some libtarded white woman telling me about my experience as a partially black chick. People are uncomfortable about race. I think some people are covertly racist/biased in ways they don't understand. I don't think they're truly racist. Most people that are have lived sheltered lives. Unfortunately, it seems people are more worried about the consequences of being racist than if they have racist thoughts. It can be difficult to have genuine, open conversations with others because of it. In dating, a lot of people seem to objectify their partners. I say ppl bc women do it too. I quit a sport when I was younger bc the other girls started talking about how hot black guys are - and it was just bizarre to me. Online chicks are mega weirdos about race sometimes. I used to be.I think porn and social media effected progress made (until the 2010s) by transforming it into a nasty monster. It's not a true regression - media just caused another fracture. grr dating sucks and also I hate how tight other black/brown people get about whites/other races. like chillllllll.. idk if I answered your question but yah
>>82795231>How do you think it impacted your life/career progress?It was a pretty good motivator to focus on my education and to avoid distractions. I knew I have the tendency to get addicted to things like PC games (I was obsessed as a kid) so I consciously avoided playing games in colleague because I knew I would end up failing and I had only one chance to get my degree bc of the involved expenses, eating through my savings from summer work I did in school.I agree that most racists don't mean any harm by them (the actual smart racists are probably the exception) and it's mostly them growing up in a homogeneous social group and them being mostly ignorant about other kinds of people. It was still a bit weird being called "chink chong" and similar by even educated people. I had some pretty racist professors, which was a bit weird, as they were adults/ old people and should have known better than the dumb kids. I feel that a good portion of society has difficulties seeing both sides of actions if they're not experiencing the role of the "victim". I'm a bit puzzled because how hard is it to think "I don't want my stuff to get stolen" to arrive at the conclusion that "stealing is bad", as an example. I guess there's also a significant portion of people getting racist by getting taught by their parents/grandparents that lived through traumas of war or similar, to hate specific groups of people. My grandmother from Germany had a deeply seated hatred of black people (Americans) and was seething pretty hard over videos of disco music with black people in it, lel. She lived through WW2 and died as a nazi. Must have rustled her jimmies pretty hard that her grandchildren were mixed race, lol. I guess she was kind of ok with it because we German/Japanese kids were her "allies" or something. I'm glad that I've missed all that nazi-shit but I'm afraid that ideology is alive and well in the US right now. Not sure if it's too late to nip this problem in the bud in the US.
I'm busy living.
>>82795575>"I don't want my stuff to get stolen" to arrive at the conclusion that "stealing is bad"Narcissistic traits can be, and are often, developed as a response to life circumstances. Certain communities also have been stripped of all quality leadership. Black America is an easy example. Something I hate is when black Americans are compared to the Japanese (not that you're doing this, in general). The United States is a younger nation, and blacks were emancipated recently. Slavery isn't hindering black people, but there has been an assault on the black American community since. Today, things are realllllly bad. Mom's watching other chicks complain about their baby daddies on tiktok while shushing their children to be quiet on the bus. I guess my point is that black Americans haven't had the opportunity to build shared values - also other communities/societies formed previous to or outside of liberal philosophy so maybe that has to do with it. idk though. I mainly just think about what stuff looks or sounds like nowadays :D kinda turned into a rant. I wish more people followed the "be le change" mantra because it's true! hard to think about others when your position seems worse than theirs. >>82795831you'd eat if you sent this and never posted again, or at least not with your trip.
>>82795892I'm driving my car. I don't let strangers in my car.
>>82795952Why? Are you hiding something like some tear-stained cushions in your car?
If I sold the trailer, I could buy a camper to put in the bed of my truck. That would give me 20k to make my comeback in crypto. And then I'll be back. I'd save $600 a month on lot fees, too. Maybe just park the camper truck at work, live there, I can even shower there, and try to absolutely crush some overtime. This is how my comeback starts. And I'll never tell anyone. Low-key is key. I'll just live quietly, never get my alimony and child support adjusted, keep pumping the markets, and then when I have enough I'll finally make my way to St Lucia. And that's when it really starts
C,I want you to give me all of your attention. I want to be your gf. I think about you everyday. I hope you do too and I hope you look at the letter I made for you often. I hope you visit town and we can see each other again soon. You don't want me but idc im just happy we're friends at least. I wish you would message me more. I miss you
I'm illiterate and retarded, I have no remarkable knowledge about anything and I'm afraid to talk to others online because I probably won't speak to the in person anymore. /Blogpost
>>82797651knowing a lot about diff discourse communities is worthless if you're not engaged in them seriously. what are you gonna do - argue with people on reddit and twitter? it's only useful to engage in different discourse communities if they're tied to your primary/secondary dcs. what would you like to know about? most knowledge seekers end up stressed, overwhelmed, and unable to take action towards the right things. even in their personal lives.
>>82797651What's your deal? I mean, besides being a passive aggressive cunt?
Maria, are you still awake?
So Mike, Colton is making LARPs to spoon feed Maria his story about idolized love and anon thought someone was their soulmate but wasn't and was able to happily move on. How do you feel that Colton's insecure that she is going to leave him So he's being manipulative making up stories on the internet to influence her choices and emotions? does that bother you?.>>>/adv/33799041
There's also this one. Which sounds quite a bit like he wants to discourage her reaching out to you and creating a feeling like people have changed so much so he can control her decisions. You commented but I think you thought it was her when it really is more likely it is him writing this knowing that she'll read it and it will influence her choice about you. >>>/adv/33801716
Eh, that's just how insecure that kid is. It did make me smile with her telling me I'm hot as fuck, how she's incredibly attracted to me, I'm an 11/10,Less so that she wants to peg me and force me to eat her blood at gunpoint.
alright, this shit is getting too weird, even for me and THAT says something.fuck this thread.
>>82798478It's always really easy to tell it's him making a post because he always includes details like my age and other things to make a little digs at me because he's an insecure little faggot Here is one from that thread >Op here>Just before my meltdown I got into the Pokemon Trading Card Game and it's a completely new hobby to me but now I just can't feel the will to actually go out and play it.>I was super devoted to this girl and now it's all gone. I'm 34 and I feel my time is running out, I've met people who are already married and set for life with a loved one at ages way younger than me and my biggest fear is loneliness and dying alone and unloved.
>>82798759He also loves posting in all caps for certain words in his posts. I'm not really concerned about it because Maria is smart enough to actually read threads and if she sees details in a post that are the same as ones that she knows about me, something she is going through or a current problem she is having with him and she can see if it is trying to elicit a certain emotion, viewpoint, suggested action one way or another, in those posts/thread then she knows it's a Colton Larp.
I can't wait for openAI to rebrand to proLAPSE. This bubble is ready to pop and will make the dot com bubble crash look like a small hick-up. Can we go back to creating things of actual value or something?
I still like looking at that picture of your fat thighs. The one that almost ruined your marriage.
I didn't remember my thighs looking that fat in the photo so I went back and looked. Damn. I'm super thick
oook guys I was being bipolar af. we still probably won't talk again, but I'd like to apologize to Mr.BitchSenpai for being crazy online. I just was jealous and being crazy ;o; oml
>>82797078Why St. Lucia? Expat forever, or just until the US settles down?
G,You are a status-hungry, vanity-driven, backstabbing cunt -- and it pays to be your connection of the month.When you're on top, you're really on top... Good thing all you have to do is stay there. Dog Eat " Doggy Dog " Dog
>>82801031No cap gains tax and you can buy citizenship.
Getting the literal textbook treatment from you tells me your stripmall ass therapist was a complete hack. It's easy to swindle money from folk by just telling them what they want to hear and enable their already unhealthy projections.Money well spent, right?
>>82802433why are you such a pussy? seriously. can you tell me? you can just go ahead and block me on twitter too. I'll leave you alone now.
>>82802976>Attempts to trigger abandonment wounds and push "I'll do the opposite of what you say" reaction to not leave him Pathetic manipulative bullshit
>tells me to move on>Try to move on and jumps in so I don't/gets angry when she sees me posting to meet someone
Yesterday I came into work in a good mood, but right before I tried leaving for lunch I ran over a nail. I can say it ruined my day. But my night was much worse however.It's true that nobody has any obligation to me, but it would have been nice if someone helped me. Nobody offered me a ride home, nobody checked on me, nobody offered to help me change my tire, I was alone.It's just a tire and just a nail but as I was alone in the dark at work all by myself I remembered once again that nobody even cares about me. No matter what I do for others, or how nice I am, or what I go out of the way to do it doesn't matter. Every once in a while I forget it. But I remembered last night.After I finally got home I showered, ate for the first time that day, and went to bed. While I was laying there I got to thinking about things.I regret coming to St Louis. Your image has been tainted in my mind, and I will come to hate you. I've done a lot for you, but I know it was worthless.B
To my Russian work crush,I missed you and I am looking forward to seeing you. Unfortunately I have too many stupid meetings and its making me mad.
MBTI test>You are still bothered by mistakes you made a long time ago Suddenly feel nauseous
>>82803208I read your post. I want you to know that I would have helped you. I hope that helps you know that there are people in the world who would be there and help you.
>>82803507I wouldn't want your help. My fuckbuddy Maria told me to avoid you because you are crazy.
Hey wtf? Maria is also the name of my fuckbitch
>>82803636She told me about you. She said youre mentally stable so its okay to talk to you.
>Samefag 3 jabs immediately lashing out Emotionally reactive. You are upset with me with something I did, but you won't communicate that with me. Ironic enough, I wouldn't do the thing if you communicate with me and then you wouldn't be upset. You're stuck in a rut of hating that you love me >It's raining, It makes me feel better, I hope that gives you relief
You push me away and then you miss me terribly
>>82803013Shut up mr.nevapullahoe. You don't know anything.I prefer being blocked by him if he dislikes me. You're just projecting your unconscious self perception onto me. I thought you were busy... livin life.... seems like you're back to bein like US losers!
I know I'm a loser degen for being on here, Mike. You must not feel very good about yourself spending so much time on here. I know how much time I've wasted looking at this thread in the past week or so... and we all know how much you post, tripfag. how much time is being taken away from developing your app for retards? how much time have you spent browsing this thread instead of finishing projects at the work station you showed us? don't you have a massive game collection you should dump and save before all the discs start to rot? Certainly you have more important things to do besides sitting in the the thread and projecting. I'm very aware of how much time I've been wasting. Are you? You spend as much time, if not more, browsing as me - and I've been spending way too much time on here lately. Focus on your Maria, caramel ftm, or whatfriggenever. Stay in your lane, faggot.
>>82804044I'm at the battle station today coding.
>>82804151aww that's so cool. you should send a picture with the thread open on one of the monitors! that's what we used to do in room threads a few years back lol
You guys live on a grid of active threads on this monitor here.
>>82804198why can't we see where we are :( is that windows 7 and why do you use a thousand diff wallpapers??
>>82804186I built a new desk and I'm in the middle of an battle station v6! In the next letter thread all post my battle stations over the years.
Next someone should leak the conversations that glowies (and their cumstains) have in elitist, gatekept discord servers.Oh wait, actually if you try to do that, they'll cyberstalk you for years in a show of higher calling altruism.Right "stgggs"?
>>82804240I have a multi boot setup. I use Windows 10 for gaming, streaming. I use Windows 7 ultimate for my software development work because it is stable and will not kill itself randomly and not allow access to ways to fix it without reinstalling the operating system. I can turn the computer off and turn it back on and it's in the same state it was in before. Windows 7 ultimate is the best os system I've ever experienced. Even the search bar works! I use a software that changes wallpapers and selects randomly from a folder I have on all of the monitors every 15 seconds and adds a task bar every monitor
>>82804146I'm here for her. I've stated before, once we're together I'll be gone. The time I spend here is worth it because she is worth it.
Gracie,You're mildly attractive yet very fuckable
>>82804322Don't get me wrong, I'll fuck her brains out but it's honestly not about the physical for me. It's about her, who she is
>>82803832Oh boy! SHE SET YOU UP!I mean, yes. Very stable. Very safe
It's funny how you act like I don't know how miserable you are, pulling all nighters hitting refresh here, All day everyday just to escape from your life now. Look in the mirror at how you look now compared to then. Did you make the right decision? Really ask yourself that
At least I'm not a spineless bootlicking faggot.
>>82804793No you're living with that
No wonder you spend all day trying to escape it and everything else around you
, said the spammer with six monitors and a ringlight.
Colton won, BIG TIME
How miserable you are now, how everything is such shit for you, suffocating and trapped, unable to afford because of all the expectations surrounding you, keeping pushed to take a step forward in a direction you really don't want but everyone is telling you to, trying to get some time for yourself knowing that you're only going to be approached in a underhanded way to push you back to agreeing with the decision you don't even want but are obligated to. I'm sorry you're going through that and I never wanted that for you. It hurts me just as much to see it. It would have been different with me, everything you would have ever wanted and you know that. The only reason you're here is for me too and when I disappear for the day you bump threads looking for me. Think about that.
>>82804840I know that's not true because I see how you are right now, how you feel, what you look like If you want you wouldn't feel the way you feel about me, You wouldn't spend all this time here with me and for me, You wouldn't make threads about me all day itching for my response, anything really as long as it's from me. And when I don't respond you'll respond in my voice just to comfort yourself criticize yourself and hope that I see it to react in some way just so you have my voice again
>>82804869its okay if they keep trying to when it gets there the aolution is murder for everything thats happened
I know you love me because I feel the same things about you. It's always been that way. Completing each other. It can sound corny or whatever to other people, but they'll never understand it. They don't know what it actually feels like. The truth of it. Always off labeling it is something else, armchair diagnosis to regurgitate their own traumas or further their own agenda with you. The crime is in their misunderstandings, lies. It takes you away from us and what we truly have. All of each other. You're the only one for me. I love you more. Nothing will ever change that. I hope this gives you relief. I want to dream good dreams with you Maria. Look at me in my eyes from that day we last talked. Remember my face, my voice. Really look at me. If you need to go to my twitch to see, go ahead. But I want you to really look at me, not just say it feel it. I still love you. I wouldn't be here after all this bullshit If I didn't. Sometimes I really wish I didn't that was just some fleeting thing, something others try to push me to believe it is. But I just physically can't because I feel who you are to me in a sense that no one else could understand. I remember how I feel how everything feels when I'm with you. It's clear again. I truly do miss you and I still love you with all my heart. And it pains me.
>>82804869LOL look the narc just brazenly trying to manipulate
>>82805493I'm telling the truth, and fully prepared to see you start spamming threads same fagging and such
I didn't even mention all the ways I would fuck her brains out
>>82804793you are, just in different ways :)
Please be OK. I'm thinking about you every moment of every day. I want you to be OK, and for you to just come say hello again. I'm not strong enough to not know. I miss you.
