heemvious >>153640482
Fuck you khabib
I bet schaub got mad head during that era. On top of the world
>>153651189any time a comedian has an elaborate stage set up like this I assume they're a massive tool and I'm usually proven correct
fuck that bo cunt
>>153651244How tf can you hate this? No one is doing it like Bo
b-brentin schweeb?
SpecialYou think you're specialYou do
>>153651389MAIN EVENT!
uhh...gooby bros?
UFC WH Card likely fights 1. Topuria vs Garth main event2. Pereira vs Gane3. Yan vs O'Malley 24. Bo nigger vs colby5. Khamzat vs Strick?6. Gable Stevenson Debut7. Bo Nickal vs someone
>>153651538>khamzat No >o’malley No. Merab title shot and Yan is still injured
>>153651538>3. Yan vs O'Malley 2Yan won't be good to fight until the bottom half of the year, he just had a major back surgery BTW Yan may never be the same fighter ever again. It was a really major surgery
>>153651553What about prates vs gooby. I checked reddit and this is all I get
>>153651585Yan will be back dont blackpill
>>153651601Anon they're not going to book Conor McGregor against a giant welterweight who hits hard and can fight southpawsThey're going to give him Colby or something
>>153651538Sorry kid best we can do is Pereira vs Ankalaev 3
From model to pudge
Evloev vs MurpheyIngusheita vs BurminghamDaddyspam vs BLACKEDspamAllah vs Allah
>>153651538>Pereira vs Ganefucking YAWN
>>153651641weight cuts are brutal anon, you lose 20 pounds of water weight in 12 hours and you'll look like a desiccated skeleton too
>>153651489idk seems like prime gooby to me
Who wins?
>>153651667Most fighters don't go from in shape to ball of fat in a few weeks
>>153651678It's really easy to look good against fat ass unranked heavyweights That said Blaydes is a chinlet so who knows
>>153651654Whatever happens, MUZDADDIES win. Pigclitties will SQIURT! LEE RIGBY WAS RAPED!!!
>>153651678Costa will heem this fat dagi
BEASTpuria? Never knocked outPigslam? Oh dear oh dear......
>>153651716Costa only looks good against Southpaws
FACT: Costurd has never heemed FACT: Strickgaped has never heemed (apart from he dead daddy’s dick)
>>153651745Ur brown
>>153651771We love our black and brown daddies here.
I tried to warn you about Thiel. And now schaub is caught up in all this shit?!
11 days until we are the o filho da puta mais foda
joe rogan, 127 IQ, 97th percentile
>Chatri declares WAR on RIZIN. Vows to become the REAL PrideFCRizin bros... we're so fucked
>>153651918
Joe Rogan lost 30 IQ points after getting Zooted with B-Real
>>153651389>>153651678>>153651716amazing fucking fights oh man UFC is so back baby!
>>153651489I’m too much of a 35yo boomer to understand objectiveless video games like picrel and Minecraft. Why would anyone want to just run around and explore with no goal or purpose
>>153652316How do you feel about your own life?
>>153651972Why does he start smiling when the shorts come off
>>153651244You will regret this post.
>>153652335cause it makes him happy?
>enters thread
>>153652271Were just in the rebuilding phase of the UFC. That's why uros medic got to heem Neal, kuniev got rid of almeida and now hokitt will replace blaydes. Kavanagh will zeem moreno this weekend too. It will seem "shit" now but will pay off later.
>>153652329breddy good, might grab a cheesesteak for lunch
pon bed pon floor against walli heem dem all 'til dem call mei'm di mingedem sugar dats allwelcome di king of di heemhall
Did we watch andy and Tommy make pasta in their new members only video? Apparently aspinall had some new sayings that mma guru would love.
They should put some cartel soldiers on this weekend’s Mexico card
>>153652461I swear there's one dentist in the UK they all get the same donkey teeth
>>153652471Cartel members vs IDF soldiers
>>153651538They better give Gable the Greg Hardy treatment and sign a tomato can for his first couple fights. He’s not UFC level yet
>>153652343
>>153652491They’re called turkey teeth for a reason mate
Taira vs Van who wins
>>153652546Taira withdrawledGonna be Van vs Kape Until Kape withdrawalsGonna be Van vs Horiguchi
ching chong vs chung ching wow what a matchup
>>153652565Until Horiguchi withdrawsGonna be Van vs Da Lou II
Panties will be 36 coming off a serious injury when he next fights why are people so sure he’s getting the belt back
>>153652443Les go fo dat!
>>153652616Jackie Chan would heem you
https://youtu.be/PfsyLLeULkY?si=1MM1wGRvzqHRIrAe
>>153652565>taira withdrawled According to who?
>>153652642The retards here believe “news” from xitter accounts with 20 followers
>>153652642UpfrontMMA is one of the best sources for breaking UFC news but none of you know that because you’re casuals
give me the easiest fight in the divisiongive me (You)
there is no red, blue corner. we call those the prime hydration recovery zones
It’s not true. I checked with my sources.
>>153652662honestly respect if kape steps in
>>153652813You have sex with men.
>>153652765kape is cool>>153652813alright you've already done a lap now cut it out pal
me beating (you) to death at your family reunion
Didn't Kape get heemed by the Mokaev dude lmao if Kape wins
>>153652662Upfrontmma made that post before taira himself confirmed hes fighting van... that makes no sense
>>153651678Blaydes is a legit heavyweight. He’ll be way bigger than Hokit. If Blaydes doesn’t get sparked in the first he’ll win
Blaydes got touched up by that obese brazza he might be washed
>>153651716Murz chins him. Too fast
>>153652860You are a pedophile.
>>153652843You have to be room temperature IQ to cheer on a man elbowing a bag on the ground
>>153652855
>>153652881turn your imam's monitor on>>153652884you on the fent again?
Anyone here who genuinely believed that Taira had pulled out should feel like a fucking idiot
Technically they are both hapas
>>153652905Anon no one believes that
>>153652843should have done that to Imavov instead of...*checks notes*... absolutely nothing
>>153652662>t. upfrontmma adminBuy an ad
>>153652843there is no way i am in any way related to brasiwians not even 1% of 1% of 1% of my dna
I know this isn't the place for MMA discussion, but did anyone read about PFL and RIZIN's new roster sharing? Instead of PFL vs RIZIN cards, they're making it so PFL fighters can fight in Rizin and Rizin fighters can fight in PFL. Guess you could have a PFL and Rizin double champ.It's also PFL's last year on ESPN. If they fuck up, PeeFL probably downsizes to a Fight Pass feeder promotion.
>>153652983yeah brazilians can actually fight
shut up
>...
>>153653022top 5 silva autism moments
>>153653022Diego's son.
>>153652916Yeah isn't Lone'er half Bong and half Chinese?
>>153653042He’s half jacked taiwanese boy what up
>>153653074
>>153652885HOLY DIMES
>>153653074Just cut this faggot from the sport already
>>153653074People actually pay to watch this shit
Aspinall admitted he has a small cock
>>153653097
>>153653074hate to say i told you so
>>153653140Nothing wrong with that
>>153653074Aspinall family does seem like the kind of tards that would eat spaghetti with their hands
Would /heem/ pay to watch me make pasta?
Why does Tom insist on putting his old man in all these videos? Who the fuck wants to want Andy Aspinall make pasta?
Tragic news: Tom Aspinall has lost a hand in a pasta making incident
Which fighter experienced the biggest aura loss?
What has Tom Aspinall done to you personally?
Toms gonna be making a lot of pasta after my boy Assplum heems him and make him his love slave/chef.
Tomala Troonspinall actually went to Italy to get gender reassignment surgery but sadly xher little clitty was so small that they just couldn't make a vagina out of it sadly...... The pasta making was just a cover up i fear
>>153653239watch out for a kid named anatoly kwaboli
Imavov has less of a chance at beating Khamzat than Strickland btw
>>153653439khamzats already mentally cleared out mw. nobody there could beat him so why waste their primes looking like crushed cans when they could look competitive if they fought each other instead. khamzat will take 2 or 3 fights at lhw then move up again after he makes them all look stupid
>>153653470m8 the meme that khamzat is some kind of invincible monster died 4 years ago
>>153653261wasted my bloody time
>>153653261stuck his hand in my pasta
>>153653511You do that yourself every single day.
>>153653083Fuck I love Luke
>>153653503with every heavyweight fight we see more and more how big of a fraud tomala is. cope and seethe you big gay bitch. khamzat would dog fuck him
>>153653535I also jack off every day, doesn't mean I want Tom doing it for me
ramadan got these muzzies cranky
Tom's Feed and Seed
Tom and Andy JOI instructional
Nemesio Silva
>>153653535the life i live on the daily would make you curl up like anthony smiff watch your tone kid
>>153653689based tito
starting an offshoot of islam where i scrap hundreds of years of abrahimic history and declare our history based on ancient egypt and using that energy to round out the already world beating wrestling with top notch sun/snake/cat like reflexes and striking
>>153653701Friend of the queer community
what pray do tell are sun like reflexes
>>153653739 try making the sun flinch. im already listening to super high rate isochronic tones to slow down time
>>153653760this seems like it could have disastrous consequences of the worst kind are you sure it's legal
>>153653777pharoah answers to no man
I'd HEEM Ra
>>153653684You're right, eating two large meat lovers pizzas with extra cheese would make my tummy hurt.
Heemhotep
Ya’ll niggas is pussy. I’d run up in yo house and yo ass would be crying in the closet.
Just farted myself unconscious
>>153653881we know you're out the closet sneedy t
The curious case of Tom Aspinall's facial hair
The bicurious case of Jon Jones
The Quadridexterous Case of Conor Mcgregor
imagine being so scared of some 3000 surplus calories
Apple bottom jeans!
>>153653989fascinating
its over
>>153653821me on you is how itd play out my friend
Robert Whittaker will likely suffer serious bodily harm at 205lbs
Slamdaddy clears
>>153653597you see this you punk ass bitch >>153654092
Slamdaddy adorned with lubricant
just made a new pillowpoof thread you'll never guess the op
we get it clozzy you love blacks
very disrespectful
>>153653986Imagine being a fat retard with a dead mom.
>>153654234Like mother like son I suppose
Rumour has it, Islam Makachev has been on a pork ting
Jondaddy spunked Tomala without ever lubing xer.
>>153654448Remember when you kept trying to argue Aspinal was the real champ even when Jon Jones defended the undisputed belt against Stipe? Lol, you were the biggest Aspinal glazer on heem for months
Casa de Schaub
*Clap Clap*Aspinal Glazer!*Clap Clap*Aspinal Glazer!
>>153654431>Rumourkhabib has personally identified it with his patented arse sniffing technique
>>153654567
Khabib proudly identifying a fart in the aka gym as "American smell" is one of the most nauseous moments in MMA history
>>153654558I could never afford a house like this
>>153654594you'd probably want your nose to be wonked in that situation
TRVKE: asspinall has never won an undisputed heavyweight championship fight
aspinall is literal and i mean genuinely absolute and utter dogshit
>>153654697I bet you wished your nose was wonked when you found your mom's dead body rotting away.
aspinall is the only man born on british soil to win a UFC belt and you will act like it.
>>153654477Poor little schizo Armpiggy is very confused
nothing irritates me more than when the fighters are on the fence after a huge KO and some retarded faggot comes up to them "get down from there!!! get down from the fence!!! hey!!!! get down from the fence!!!"SHUT UP FAGGOT.
Every fighter on the White House card will snack on DDPonald’s dementia dingleberries per Ari Emanuel
>>153654797They're terrified of khabib style brawl
Nigger nigger nigger nigger
>>153654827ZAMN! THAT'S A DING DONG DIDDILY DOOKIE!
>>153654840Don’t get Clozapig hangry please
>>153654773The funny part is I have the least idea of what's actually going on here out of everybody.
6 title fights! CIA black ops being run during said fights. Palantir facial recognition technology being ran through your webcam on streameast. Let's fucking go!
OK, I'll get down from the fence
>>153654913The Eagle. In a game of blood, we saw a man who never bled.
>>153654913Prime Khadaddy was special
Danis fucked up that subhuman. Notice he never tried that shit again since.
Chudbib Nurmoggedamedov
One Khabeast kick retired dildo D’anus from MMA. Chills.
>>153654940Ducked Ferguson though, those elbows would have sliced him up bad
>>153655013Pretty sure it was GSP that his dad wanted him to face
>Khamzat looking very confident here he's one of the most incredible wrestlers we've ever se->OH! KHAMZAT'S HURT! HE'S OUT>IIIIIT IIIIS ALLLLLLL OVER! SEAN STRICKLAND BYYYY KNOCKOUT!
Zatdaddy will make Shota Shawna his sissy sex slave That raped faggot finna be FARTin on it!Strickgaped will SQUIRT and SQUEAL while being implanted with hot steamy Zatdaddy seeds His papa porked prolapsed BUSSY Finna drip with POZZED LOADS That Pigga’s great gape gotta be creamed wid caucus cummies!
>>153655070Excellent post.
>>153654859It's insane how many of my posts have imprinted on you.
It’s insane how Ganedaddy’s BBC imprinted on TWPmala’s orb
bad news guys Khamzat got bad belly from eating a candy bar
>>153655190based michael banishing the jewish ghost befoer it could get his wallet
>>153655192One good post comes to mind a lot, it was one heemer talking about how fighters not gathering enough experience hinders their knowledge against contenders who are stylistically their kryptonite >>141101285
>>153652843weem when that one dude posts "Nigger"
Yeah I'm a jacked Taiwanese boy whatup
Khumsplat doesn't know how to throw a jab or defend a jab, all Strickland throws are jabs. Done deal
>>153655279khamzat usman and (technically) umar all undefeated and (hypothetically) champions
>>153655377...which is exactly why he's already trying to leave Strickland's weightclass,for an easier matchup
sean r strickland got smothered by bicus he got no chance against zatdaddy or de ridder for that matter
Nigger
>>153655452>Strickland has no chanceYou thought the same thing when he fought Adesanya.
>>153655452Strickland is the worst possible matchup for RDR
adesanya 48-47 on damage
>>153655452I bet you thought he had no chance against hooptie hernandez either you treacherous maple scum
>Canadians >AsiansName a group who is less qualified to speak on combat sports.
khamzat is out and proud I'm so happy for our brazza :)
>>153655512if you could see whats in my mind youd see an image of strickland getting kneed in his ugly raped face by future champ reiner >>153655525true but thats only because i didnt expect hernandez to come out looking like a bitch. all he had to do was say we're not playing strickland bitch rules were fighting like men and he couldve won. give him 9 do overs he does them all over
Ratlip bros...we HAVE to shoot for Sean Strickland's balls immedietly!!
>>153655577You're brown
>>153655577Stricksational is going to give chimpev five more cleft lips
Realest nigga alive.
>>153655468
>>153652999Their clitties are unironically leaking in fear of GODri. He's secured enough money this time to put them out of business legitimately. 90k USD performance bonuses in 12 fights a year. Poaching all the good rizin fighters. Rizin is finished sadly.
>>153655657Because blowing 500 million down the drain worked so well for shartri already…nEWS FOASH: NOBODYS WATCHING THAT CRAP
>>153655783Kek, bodied that freak
>>153652843de reddit is fucked.
Luke Rockhold has taught Joshua Van how to utilize the question-mark kick
Which fighter?
rdr still has the potential to be triple champ
>>153653074>uhhh g-guru, you're still team tommy innit? w-we need your fans to become members. you fellas dont wanna miss the new aspinall sayings do ya?
>>153655875tom looks like a big retarded mannequin some retarded kid (his son) doodled all over
>>153655844Van was too retarded to figure it out and just learned to teep instead.
>>153655875Damn Thommeh get some fookin poon tang lad hoyl fuck lad are you fuken yer dad lad? Fuken pasta making how about fuken glassjarboofing u fuken fagot
>>153655994early footage of tito ortiz becoming the beach bad boy
>>153655909Imagine if Van actually even cared about MMA
buhbuhbuh I only have teep
buhbuhbuh I move card I use flip phone apex buhbuh
>>153655875>MMA GURU I HOPE YOURE PART OF TEAM ASPINALLKEK they heard Guru saying Tom is washed>Live for membersWho is paying for a membership?
>>153652882You've never been in an MMA gym
im the best.
>>153656109*heems you edfortlessly*
Uhhh Gane bros... What's going on with Gane's skin...?
>>153656109You deed it
>>153656152learn to leave well enough alone
>>153656152They shouldn't let Gane dress himself, what the fuck is that nigger wearing?
>>153656218Who the fuck are you? Gane has slept in the streets of Milan! He got a bodyrub from Emmanuel Macron in 2019, who the fuck are you?!?
yeah bitchnow tell me the mma news
>>153656376BJ Penn defeated El Nemesio via Submission (Death) RD 1
>>153656376Gane began Champ Camp this week in Dubai.
>>153656299I'm a mediocre piece of shit, no talent nothing
Who are some fighters that respect the silence that serves as the foundation of creativity?
>>153656457james vick
>>153656457not your mama, I had that bitch screamin'
>>153656467My mom is dead
>>153656376colbeast moves up to 13 in the ww rankings after medics impressive win over geoff neal
>>153656457that aint be talkin too much you mean? or something else?anyway id say fedor.
>>153656457Matt Hammill
>>153656457Matt Hamill
>>153656544had that ghost bitch screamin' OoOoOoOoO
>>153656593>>153656596did you guys coordinate this?
>>153656627We are friends in irl
test
>Surrounds (you)
>>153656627me and Canada are OGs and remember when TUF had sovl, you can't just forget incredible moments in mix martial combat history like that
>>153656457tom aspinall after he gets raped in his next fight methinks
Sometimes you just have to be the bitch
Tom Aspinall...is deaf now
>>153656457
Conors basically the forty year old guy at the bar wearing his high school Letterman jacket.
>>153657031Nah he never talks about a Cage Warriors double champ and he never wears the belts to any event. You're thinking of Paddy.
>>153657008>tom aspinall>next fight lol
*Matt Hammill voice*Hasbullahs head would make an great spaghetti
You have sex with men
>>153657117
>>153657117And have relatoinships with women!
>>153657140thank you Tito but this is for display it's made of plastic
>>153657140Tito I ordered the roast beef sandwich what is this
>what does michael venom paige have to say about this?kek
>>153657450You ordered a roast beef sandwich at a Mexican cantina?
>>153657585Tito recommended it
Boy howdy this is an all time low for /weem/....who wanna talk Spencer Fisher?! His flying knee on Matt Wiman was insane
Extensive research shows that PvZ's bungussy is actually the center of a smell phenomenon that just might save the world
Welp.
whats next for canadian fighter brendan allen?
>>153657991losing in a parking lot to the guy that heemed bj
>>153658133well, hes officially ranked #4 so I think things are looking good for him(us).
I'm looking for PvZ's butthole right now but can't find the webm. I'm scared
wonder what happened to Mike Dolce that guy was a big deal for a minute
>>153658216Follow your nose.
heeminder jizzy pre coped the strickland loss with those "injured" push ups
Brendan Allen isn't canadian.
>>153658324false>>153657991
>>153658338I'm unironically correct in this case and the multi billion dollar company is spreading falsehoods.
>>153658324Fuck yuo
THE NINTH ISLAND
The nth island
sometimes when I gotta fart before shitting I preplant on the seat and then try to fart out the turd as hard as possible to see how much backsplash I can get
Good way to fuken pink sock yourself. Stay thirsty my friend.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P_okeaorRVE>wow /heem/ you're so small teehee
jon crow jon crow what's that ya poppina powerful PED they call banned substance
Kwab
I WAS BORN WITH A DICK IN MY BRAIN. YEAH FUCKED IN THE HEAD. MY STEP FATHER SAID THAT SUCKED IN THE BED. THEN ONE NIGHT HE SNUCK IN AND SAID, WERE GOING OUT BACK, I WANT MY DICK SUCKED IN THE SHED
prefight promo with Strickland using a wrecking ball on the Noche when?
>>153658766Was Eminem really raped?
>>153651389JOHNNY JOHNNY JOHNNY!
>>153658794how did johnny walker not get cut yet, this shit is baffling
>>153658811He just won a main event dumbass
>>153657960WELP IS THE BEEG SCHO
Johnny Moonwalker
>>153658792>92Afraid so
>>153658794early stoppage, Johnny was so mad at the end he heemed himself in protest
>>153658873Goldberg Jackhammering this doo and the ring collapsing was the greatest moment of cobant sports history
>>153658982I disagree it was when Eddie Guerrero fed Bigshow laxative burritos and he shit himself
Johnny Walker, wow
Hoenstly? Eugene would dominate most of the UFC roster
Little ditty about Bo and Diane...Two American kids growin' up in the heartland...Bo gon' be a UFC starDiane's debutante backseat of Bos car...
Bo Nickal, wow
bo n_____
>>153659020Eugene is the DDP of wrasslin except hes not gay
Jim West status?
BO NIGGER. Respectfully.
Tom Aspenladd
prison when for ja kobe
I'm Blind Tommy Apsy and this here song is called Gane the Revelator
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D766wc2m_C8
Staying the night aty gfs apartment looks like wild sex is on the menu
>>153659208Youre not Finald b
>>153659208be sure to get him up to speed on the Strickland being the DOG last weekend
>>153659208I got next
Pat Barry is in the files
>>153659208Make suer you suck her cock b. For us.
>>153659186Why did he fall bellow the negro? It felt like he was getting a pass, but then he went backwards and opened his arms allowing the negro to murder him. I saw the negro pushing him away, but I don't think that would be enough. Sorry, I just want to know how to defend against this takedown if there was any other stuff involved.
The fight announcements just keep getting worse
>>153659186How the FUCK did we let this slide?
>>153659186there were 0 heems on the card up until that point, nothing wrong with giving the fans a little extra heemin'
>>153659264bad hips and he let go of the lock late for Harrell. Smith is reaching behind but it is at an angle and hes black cant expect much iq. Smith does fall into a perfect bridge having scrambled his entire life and couldve subbed Harrell having his arms flailing. Instead chose to go hard. Harrell chose a trip over running a single on him or anything but that.
>>153659223mine is off to court this morning for a bakers dozen of crimes and i have a small pantoja sized hangover chatri help me
/heem/ is dead
Heil Hitler
>>153659483- bruder nhh
my life is like a sweetdish moviespun pusherlilja4ever
>>153659272>>153659468>bakers dozen of crimes>How the FUCK did we let this slide?>/heem/ is dead
Dana Blanco vs Nemesio Jr. OOOOOH MY GOOOODNESS
