Disappointment day edition>Banzuke:http://sumodb.sumogames.de/Banzuke.aspxhttps://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoBanzuke/index/>Fight Schedule & Results:https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoMain/torikumi/1/1/>Some sumo links and how to watch live:https://rentry.org/uwbgc88dPrevious thread >>153765250
Anime
Another basho and sad to see Hosh still has the same problems with his slow ass tachiai.When he loses against a more explosive guy again I will be here to point it out again. Luckily WakatakaKOGA is his bitch.
Another stack to Hakunofuji beating funds
>>153793671its kind of amazing how this could also be his expression upon seeing onosato completely obliterate somebody
roga tried so hard to lose
>>153793882In Britain we'd say he "has a face like a slapped arse".>>153793885His wins and losses must remain equal. The 7-8 is inevitable.
Does anyone understand what causes /ourneanderthal/ to win or lose, or is it actually just completely random?Also, final bingo link for latecomers: bingobaker.com#10182298
Dan is embarrassing.
>>153794555He scrambles, waves his arms around, and if his opponent gets confused by his lumbering awkward movements then they get pushed out.
The Dan problem has been solved. His one tricked figured out. It's over.
A 12-3 win is no win at all.
Kotokenryu, mongol who was in maezumo at the same time as Kotoeiho and Hananoumi is going to leave sumo or something
None of these guys are anything special.
How is Onosato doing now?
>>153793640Onosato getting jiggy with it
Shirokuma is cute :3
Barnum and Baileys, in collaboration with the Ringling Brothers, is proud to present the 2026 Haru Basho
>>153794808Is he a bisexual cuckold like Will Smith?
DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! GET IT TOGETHER! THE PEOPLE OF UKRAINE ARE WATCHING YOU!
dan almost had him
>>153794913why is he kryptonite?
>>153794913What are you smoking kraut? Yoshi initiated that move to break Dan's left hand grip on the belt. None of that was offense from Dan.
>>153794941>Yoshi initiated that moveSure, but it was risky as you can see in the picture. If Dan pushes forward in that moment he wins.
Kusano reaffirmed his superiority in the Aonishiki matchup. Who else could step up to cockblock the rope run? Kirishima pulled off a win last sho, but I don't think he has the juice this time. Atami was close in the last fight, so that's a maybe. Oho can beat anyone on any given day, but also lose to anyone so another maybe. Onosato's looking hobbled, but he was hobbled last time and somehow won, so another maybe. Hosh not kwabing is a longshot. He's seemed to have figured out how to handle Takayasu, Zak has never been an issue, and WTK who gave a good fight last time has a fucked elbow. Odds are still looking alright for the white man barring a spectacular collapse.
Aonishiki is going to choke worse than any have choked before. Bro is already eating loses on day 2. Fucking loser. He doesn't train hard enough. Hakuho was always in the gym or on the dohyo. He was never running from training or complaining about conditioning and stamina.
>>153794913And Atami almost had Hosh on day one. Doesn't matter THO.
>>153794998Hakuho was a bum.
>>153794978>If Dan pushes forward in that moment he wins.He literally couldn't because Yoshi is actively spinning him around while that's happening.
>>153795015Hakuho was in Maezumo when he turned 16.
>>153795015Hak could come out of retirement today and dominate everyone.
>>153795015>What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch?
>SAY HIS N-ACK!
>>153795071N-nothing, sir! Please don't hurt me!
>>153795089KWABOTY
>>153794913Lmao the cope is strong in this screencap.If you watch the video Ao was getting spun around and fighting for his life in this moment
Dan ain't nuthin' but a bitch!(bitch!)Dan ain't nuthin' but a bitch!(bitch!)Dan ain't nuthin' but a bitch!(bitch!)
>>153795089Yoshinofuji kept his arm under Aonishiki's left armpit all the time and when it looked like his left hand of doom was about to grab the mawashi he backed off. Dan is solved.
Hosh had a front row seat for Yoshi's masterclass on how to dismantle Dan. March will be Hosh's 3rd yusho.
Year of the Horse.
Look at the fucking chin on the guy in the back.
>>153795242Giga Chad-sama
>>153795242Not only does he have built in sumo headbutt defense, he's also a solid 6 inches taller than the next tallest guy there.
>ONOSATO SMASH>Its not very effective>LoseDude needs more training. Sooner or later a big bigger dude will come along and use him as a kinboshi dispenser.
>>153795281Isn't Atamifuji already slightly bigger? Or at the very least fatter...
>>153795242Fudoiwa?
>>153795314>>153795270>213cmjesus christ
>>153795071We need sumo navy pasta
>>153795089Yoshinofuji won with same tactic in their first match in makuuchi.https://www.youtube.com/shorts/rSXlSyJquAg
>>153795477That isn't Yoshinofuji that's Kusano. Did you link the wrong match?
>>153795530
>>153795089KUSANO!!!!!!!
>>153795546Why is his neck so much skinnier than his head?
>>153795688Why wouldn't it be?
>>153795688This nigga been watching too much DBZ.
This Fujiryoga guy looks like a thumb.
>>153795688Spoken like a true incel.
I could easily yorikiri everyone in this ITT thread.
>>153795089sumo looks fun
>>153795862It's like fight club minus brutalising each other. Just guys letting it all out.
>>153794808i dunno why JSA even tried to fast track Takakeisho into getting the rope when Onosato got it anyway, if they were that desperate to have a Japanese Yokozuna that time.
>>153795694Cause he wrestles for a living and a wrestler strengthening his neck sounds like a good idea to prevent injury, especially when head to head collision is so common.
>>15379599120+ years in and still going. Clearly not.
>>153795928>i dunno why JSA even tried to fast track Takakeisho into getting the ropeThis never happened.
>>153796035The guy can barely get out of bed if the morning and has to lie still for half an hour until the pain is manageable after waking up. He's not exactly the picture of good health.
>>153796333Sounds like a bed issue.
>>153795875It looks there is some technique and fundamentals to it if i am not mistaken
anyone got the webm of kisenosato doing the speed trying not to laugh face while judging for some lower division match?
>chris scolds kisenosato for laughing
>>15379513330+ years old btw
Kuso bros, Kazuma bros, we ate good today.>>153793034That's what REAL fans of Yoshi call him. We were there from the start, chud. We watched the grass grow.>>153793671This nigger just wants to disappoint me personally and can fume all he wants, should've let his guy stay home and get some rest.
>make yokozuna with record speed>suffer catastrophic injury>forced to retire Damn.
>>153796602Thats not a fair metric or else you would call every wrestler by their first shikona and nobody would know what the fuck you were talking about
>Thats not a fair metric or else you would call every wrestler by their first shikona and nobody would know what the fuck you were talking about
>>153796602I really can't tell how good of a wrestler Kazuma is. His size is so overwhelming that he can win for free but that won't last as a sekitori. His day one match was just awful.
>>153796788He has great potential but unpolished technique
My boy Nobehara is going to ascend this tournament I can just feel it
>>153796815This basho's two promotions to juryo will be Okaryu and Enho. Sorry!
>>153794555>what causes /ourneanderthal/ to win or loseYes. When he uses his big neanderthal paws to slap the shit out of his opponents, it off balances them due to his power, and he can then use those moments to push / pull his opponents to the ground or off the dohyo. When he doesn't slap the shit out of his opponents, they defeat him based on pure technique and better coordination.
>>153794763>How is Onosato doing now?0-2 atm. He's probably broken and hiding it. I bet he goes kyujo if he loses again.
>>153794823Clown post.
friendship ended with Dan, now Yoshi is my best friend.
>>153797210Just take a tournament off to recover holy shit that's your literal right as a zuna.
>>153797226Dishonoraburr dispray
>>153797226>Just take a tournament off to recoverYea, but they're going to make a good show of trying before they finally call it to keep in line with the whole sumo spirit thing.
>I'm going to be the first caucasian yokoz-ACK!
>>153797226I'm starting to think that Kisenosato might have Teru's number when it comes to disappointed glares.
>>153797262>when a white boy try an catch a lil motion
Most Yokozuna give it a good 5 days or so before going kyujo.
>you can’t SHOO the ‘RYUU
no neck no problem
>>153797262>first caucasian yoko*second
>>153797414ハーフ
After Onosato kyujos the path for Dan's 14-1 is clear. Yoshinofuji & Hakuoho are the only guys who routinely trouble him and KiriSHITma is injured
How did hoshoryu's knee get better without the rest and surgery but onosato's shoulder seemingly hasn't improved at all? Genuine question, I know nothing of sports medicine and I'm curious but also gutted for Onosato.
>>153797936Are you stupid?
>>153797262why does dan make poopskins seethe so hard?
>>153797964yeah
>>153797936Was his knee injury serious enough for surgery in the first place?
>>153797989It was a torn meniscus as far as I know. I was under the impression that continuing to fight on that was a death knell for the knee but I don't know, that's why I was asking. Meanwhile I've had my shoulder out of socket before and I know how that is, it healed up fine pretty quickly. I was just asking because I don't know the ins and outs.
Trannytame up again tonight. Can he be stopped on his blitzkrieg to sanyaku?
>>153798018Depends on the size of the tear. Doctors are full of shit desu, as are translators. Remember when everyone said Atamin had hip arthritis? Fuck outta here retard.
>>153797936Onosato needs a hug and kiss on the cheeks. JSA should sponsor him a Yamato Nadeshiko so he gets his spirit back up. Hoshoryu probably doesnt give af and just fights through the pain.
>>153798159>Hoshoryu probably doesnt give af and just fights through the pain.He uses extremely strong prescription strength pain killers like fentanyl, he doesn't give af because of how high on drugs he is
>>153797936he drink horse milk
>>153798243That's skim horse milk.
MidnightSumo isn't so bad once your brain reflexively filters out Twitchspeak.
>>153798219Horse tranquilizers
>>153798286Don't worry, most people here watch his stream but pretend they don't
>>153798018a lot of the meniscus doesn't get enough blood flow to actually heal a tear and recovering from a serious surgery can take a year. it'll probably get worse. whether that becomes a career-ending problem for him depends on the tear, a lot of athletes have partial meniscus tears that they just play through until they retire.the shoulder is a complex area, injuries can heal in a couple weeks or they might take multiple surgeres and a year or more.
>>153798286Its the complaining about chat nonstop and the paranoia over clip farming like he is creating the content. He just sucks so fucking much.
>>153798018I always heard it was just a partial tear, it may have not been so bad
>>153798381Back when he took over after people were sick with Karla his stream was fine. I'm talking 2022. That changed over a year or so and I've been abema/ahenka/s0desu since.Midnight ends up being a lot of peoples entry to streams so it gets brought up constantly. That's it.
>>153798541Didn't he used to just stream and not talk or am remembering that wrong?
>>153798580Correct, twitch jannies deciding that restreaming abema was no longer acceptable, UNLESS, you make the content transformative by talking over it.Personally I had stopped watching before that came into effect. Playing music over the stream regularly and cutting away when there was a potential injury even when Abema/NHK show everything was enough for me.
>>153798381I dont
>>153798605it was probably abema themselves deciding that because youtube channels have gotten regularly hit tooi usually watch datasumo these days because at least he doesn't talk about shit that isn't sumo
>>153798739Nah, the "transformative" content thing is twitch enforced across lots of other types of streams.
>>153798801that's the standard for fair use under us copyright law
>>153795015it's not how you start it's how you finishwe can't begin to compare aonishiki to hakuho until the end of aonishiki's careerspoiler, it won't be anything near hakuho
all that jumping at the edge of the ring finally caught up to onosato
'sharto on the 'zuke
Dan is a skirt wearing sissy.
Question! You know the rule about no women being allowed on the dohyo? What is a wrestler comes out as transgender? Will they force her into retirement?
>finally watch last night's matches >Dan's yokozuna run is already deadnow what the fuck am I watching for
女性禁止
>>153799098A repulsive freak like that would be forced out and then commit suicide
>>153798955>we can't begin to compare aonishiki to hakuho until the end of aonishiki's career>spoiler, it won't be anything near hakuhoCorrect, Hakuho's career ended with him being ejected from the sumo association for negligence and Dan will never publicly humiliate himself like that because he isn't a retarded scumbag like Hakuho. Dan has more hinkaku in his left little toe than the entire nation of Mongolia has cumulatively.
Anti-Danners to be penalized by the JSAhttps://topics.smt.docomo.ne.jp/article/jprime/entertainment/jprime-40818
>>153799137How is it dead? Does he need to win a lossless tournament for him to be promoted?
>>153799392based on our like, 3-4 data points, the big boys are figuring aonishiki out faster than the reversei think he's gonna go 11-4 jy and the jsa are going to have a real pickle on their hands
>>153799473They won't promote him on an 11-4 jun. It would be literally the weakest yokozuna promotion in almost 60 years. 13-2 D would be the bare minimum for a non-yusho, and it would likely depend on who else he loses to and who yushos.
>>153799473In his last 3 tournaments how many losses has he had?Now how many of those losses were to Onosato, Yoshi, or a henka?
>>153799258That disgusting hairy shitstain on his shoulder is -100 hinkaku
I miss when Chris was the greatest sumo schizo.
>>153799539>who else he loses tohe is undefeated against most everyone else he will face and the few he isn't undefeated against he has a winning record against. so he won't be losing to anyone else. onosato will bow out before he meets Dan, and onosato & kusano are the only guys who can beat Dan. 14-1 is a mortal lock
>>153799606its +6 million hinkaku for epic wabi sabi
Can we stop talking about Aonishiki and send our prayers to Tamawashi?
>>153799630Fujinokawa, Churanoumi and Daieisho can do it. I berieve in them.
>>153799655*
>>153799622Shut up Chris
https://www.nikkansports.com/battle/sumo/news/202603100000154.htmlAbi (31, Shikoroyama stable), ranked East Maegashira 5, has withdrawn from the Spring Basho beginning on Day 3.He had been competing with heavy taping from his lower back up through his back, clearly not in perfect condition, and had started the tournament with two straight losses.His Day 3 opponent, Ōshōma, will receive a fusenshō (win by default).This is Abi’s first withdrawal since the 2022 Autumn Basho.He becomes the fourth sekitori to withdraw this tournament, following Onokatsu, Hakunofuji, and Midorifuji.
:(
>>153800055
Sumo should impose weight regulations. The super obese guys are disgusting and make sumo look like a freak show rather than an ancient sport and tradition.
>In May 2021, it was revealed by the Shūkan Shinchō, alongside the investigation into the breached COVID-19 compliance guidelines, that Ryūden was having an affair with one of his fans. It was also revealed that as a result of this relationship, the woman in question became pregnant and had, at Ryūden's insistence, an abortion; Ryūden had tried to pay her approximately 5 million yen in compensation, in vain.
Sumo should impose wright regulations. Anyone whose weight in kg is lower than their height in cm should be suspended until they gain weight.
>>153800087Shut the fuck up and eat your rice, Enho.
>>153800120This is much easier the taller you are. The metric should be the roundness of your belly.
>>153800173>This is much easier the taller you are.Exactly, manlets can fuck off.
>>153800114Nobody asked and nobody cares
>>153800114Damn Ryuden is based
>>153800055we all know who's at fault
>>153800304>La arbortista
>>153800464The tree killer?
>>153800143He is eating his rice now, the meme no longer works
>>153800055asterisk basho already
>ywn see a stop--gap Juryo shitter win the Cupwhy live
Milei haș anti-Danners pegged
You will not be yokozuna with 12-3. If wins are all that matters than there is no need for a Yokozuna Deliberation Council.
I bet there is significant overlap between my little pony fans and aonishiki fansThey both have this overwhelming vibe of perverted autistic obsession combined with low intelligence
>>153800966Truth
Kaki, the Japanese Dan, to 1-0 yesterday. Dude can break the record for the fastest trip from mæzumo to salary with a 7-0 and he is getting zero press. The press slept on Dan back when he was speedrunning the lower divisions too, really makes you wonder why the Jap sumo press ignores some of the most interesting stories.
The only chads are Trannytame fans. If you aren’t man enough to date a lady with a feminine penis you aren’t a man at all.
I can't take a guy named Kaki seriously.
>>153801332>fastest trip from mæzumo to salaryShould probably specify fastest trip from their first maezumo to salary, otherwise people will point out Hokutokuni did it faster when he came back from an injury severe enough that it knocked him off the banzuke completely. And excluded Hokutokuni, Kaki would tie the record, not break it outright, along with four others in the 6-basho era, most recently Enho.
>>153800055A NEW HOST HAS BEEN CHOSEN
>>153801332>æKill yourself.
>>153800597One low tier guy and three mid tier guys who had no chance to yuusho dropping out makes this a clown basho?
>>153801608lmao this niggæ chimpin out
>>153801608shut the fuck up
æ is wrong and it's stupid.
>>153801974Usually I hate you and think you are stupid but this is the correct stance.
Ꜵnishiki
>>153798286i can't stand the constant talking about subscribers and twitch points and shit, i know he's trying to make money but god damn>>153798605>utting away when there was a potential injurythat's gay tooinjury is part of the sport and cutting away just diminishes the rikishi's efforti do like that he plays other commercials over the same old abema ones though>>153798739same
>>153802190>Usually I hate youWho do you think I am?
>>153802473It's Aoniɕiki you bigot
>>153802473Also wrong.
>>153802541Well everyone here is me so...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gKQOXYB2cd8
>danfag has to go whine on /xs/ because everyone is shitting on him here Lmao
>>153803469You really need to get over it because you're looking at a really long next decade of him at the top of the Banzuke. I certainly don't want to deal with you crying every single day.
>>153803469Sumo needs to gain more ground on /sp/ so I never have to hear about xs ever again. I vote we kill /cric/ as its all poos
>>153803488Dan ain't nuthin' but a bitch!(bitch!)Dan ain't nuthin' but a bitch!(bitch!)Dan ain't nuthin' but a bitch!(bitch!)
>>153803488Anon, dan can't even beat Kusano. His Yokozuna run is unironically over already. dan is just going to be hard stuck at Ozeki for the rest of his career. Onosato rapes him every time as well. He's been solved.
>>153803557I am completely ambivalent about Aonishiki, but this is straight up stupid. It's day 2.
>>153803590Hes already behind the leaders and this is the easiest part of his scheduleThe fights get more difficult from here, not easierHavent you watchd sumo before?
>>153800966>>153800995>>153803469>>153803522>>153803557Ao absolutely mind broke you. No idea why. It is just a sport bro... don't take it so seriously.
>>153803598Yes, that's how I know you're stupid.
>>153803590Pay attention to when midnightsumo is talking next time and you might actually learn something
https://youtube.com/watch?v=rkFe5HM9338
>>153803602No, thats how we know you're stupid
>>153803598He lost his first match last basho in day 4 and still won.
>>153803604Nta but ouch.
>>153803604>midnightsumo I'm an ABEMA chad. Kill yourself.
>>>/xs/256849
>>153803599Ok so who here is making hilariously bad shops purely to fellate a single wrestlerUs or you? You're whipped within an inch of your life. Your tongue is so far up that ukie ass you get a taste of the chanko going down.
This man is 1/4th tape. He will explode soon
>>153803469life of the average danfag>posts daily pictures of dan>dumps entire articles for an excuse to post multiple images of dan in a row>posts cuck fanfiction of dan being cassanova impregnating japanese women>posts pictures of dan for random sumo related things that dan isn't even involved in>shits on every single wrestler dan beats>dan loses once>wow anti-danners have no lifethe irony is palpable
>>153803642Dont forget the schizo accusations of samefagging lmaoHe is so unable to accept reality he would rather believe we are crazy as he is
Good slaps
Ura will force a playoff with someone and win the basho.
One last run for Orb Lord.Finally moving around better.
>>153798381Why suffer through "commentary" of someone who doesn't bother to learn Japanese even a little when you can just watch a legally distinct Natto clone?
>>153803702>ai channel
>gooshoNot a strong name desu
>>153800055hopefully he recovers wellI'm glad he pulled out because he was shitting the bed on my fantasy picks
>>153801608how about YOU kill yourself
>>153803835It takes longer to type æ when it isn't even correct. We don't need that kind of stupid on this planet.
Post 'em.
kek tossed
>>153803891lol
>>153803891I have high hopes
fat ugly bastard bros we can't stop winning!
>>153800082nah, he just black crystalled
>>153804195ok keep me posted in the discord on your status
>>153804195Didn't ask.
>>153804200>>153804205Go fuck yourselves, shitty little cunts. You're like women bitching, just bad-spirited whining feminine faggots.
>>153804218fine, don't keep me fucking posted, I just wanted to make sure you were doing good
kayooo nooo
I hope all of you are doing well today and that your favorite rikishi lose, that's right, you heard me.
>>153804231Imagine wanting Ura to lose.
Fuck you, you're all a bunch of shit-eating assholes being assholes purely to be assholes
>>153804218Yikes, didnt know aunt flow was in town.
>>153804231Nabatame already won, he bodied that loser
>>153804256>futagoy supporterew
>>153804270futagoy looks like a stable of people I would mostly get along with. They mostly don't seem like tryhards about everything, just a bunch of guys hanging out. It reminds me of my time in the Navy in some ways. I don't usually watch the other youtube sloppas but from what I've seen the other ones seem much more strict and severe. I couldn't see futagoy slapping roga for hitting on a supporter.
how can sumo wrestlers eat so much but never shit their diapers?
>>153794913Looked similar to the position Hosh was in before losing to kirikaeshi in september
>>153804321Because they don't wear diapers.
>>153804321Rice paste glues the anus shut.
What's with the brown vest dudes?
>>153804332Osaka supporters association, or something like that.
>>153804334Ahh thank you anon.
>>153804332Yakuza
Get fucked evil spirit
>>153803604learn what? to suck a dick? no thanks.
stomp those spiritsi hate evil spirits
>>153804332Japanese Cuckold Society
Ono must love evil spirits
Takayasu looks like he's always upset
Was that a decent ring-entry?How much pain is Sato in?
>>153804367He's in 0 pain and is faking it so he can kyujo
>>153804332they love squirrels
>>153804383I'd love that squirrel.
>>153804391That's a child...
if ono can't stomp this manlet into jigoku then it really is over
LIFE IS A TREEEAAASUUUURE
The Sega man marches on
>>153804403>5'9 268Where does he keep it all?
>>153804393Doubt it.
>>153804344>>153804353These are the same
>>153804420Glutes.
I guess he was tired from having to fight off that octopus before the match.
Datasumo just got banned :(
rodeo niggas
>>153804447midnightsumo sends his regards...
>>153804451He does report other sumo channels like a faggot
>>153804447midnight is still up for some reason. >thank you wholesome chungus for the hype train yuppie!this somehow constitutes as commentary
>>153804464>for some reasonhe mentioned in his stream the other day that he got ludwig to pull some strings for him from twitch staff
LET'S GO ASAKORYU
>>153804467Good god makes my blood boil even more. He truly is greatest faggots. MIDNIGHT IF YOU READ THIS YOU'RE MASSIVE KIKE FAGGOT KILL YOURSELF
>>153804228wide bros... i don't feel so good
>>153804447ohhh so that's whydang
>>153804473they just need to eat their chanko and go wider
robbed
>>153804447Because it was a bot channel retard. M*dnight is a faggot but at least he's active in his stream.
Im fat can I Sumo?
>>153804476they could learn a lot from miyako
>>153804482your mother is active in my stream, if you know what I mean
>>153804483You'd make a good cannonball
Manlets, when will they learn?
>>153804480Tobizaru baited Asanoyama by relaxing his upperbody, but keeping his feet on tawara and Asanoyama isamiashi'd because he was too much of a nice guy to push him down the dohyo.
>>153804483Jews are not athletic
>>153804483No Yarden, stop trying.
>>153804477>>153804480He's earned a few of these after being robbed himself.
>>153804483how old are you?
>>153804483
>>153804467plebbitors be like>I would totally pay to watch sumo legally, but the NHK makes it so hard for foreigners!>is that a heckin' guy illegally restreaming abema with a cat avatar? need to donate to him ASAP!
>>153804510Okay big guy show me where I can buy sumo then
OUR RETARD
Caveman vs Goforwardyama
>>153804510why are you talking about reddit
shishi what the fuck lmao
>>153804515FUCK
>>153804512VPN + ABEMA
Well he got low, he just forgot to go forward.
was he trained to do this
>>153804540No. In fact he wasn't trained at all but not for lack of trying.
>>153804534Too much bullshit. I'll go back to watching 240p restreams on youtube
This is all a part of the retard style. Trust the retard
>tamawashi debuted before aonishiki was born
Why is the abema dude talking about Iniesta and Lebron
>>153804480>Asanoyama on KC>this happensOh well, at least now I know he's not a ruthless fuck pushing people down dohyos for no good reason.
This boomer will end with 0 wins if he keeps going like this
Guys I'm worried about the Ageless One.
>>153804546>Too much bullshitTwo mouse clicks, nigga.
>>153804559K-keep the faith
>three grains of salt
>>153804549
>>153804567do you need more?
GO URA!!!!
Toki lost his footing?
Easy
>>153804575ura hit his foot with the anti-gravity machine
Osaka stronk
Please stop giving K*toshoho wins we really don't want another repeat of that.
>>153804512Jme.TV
>>153804575I'm not sure if it was just Osaka specifically, but clay outside Tokyo is more slippery t sumo wrestlers
I read somewhere that Ura had the most kensho put on his matches this basho. Beating the zunas and Dan is no mean feat.
>>153804628osaka is his hometown
Takayasu is on fire
>>153804647Is that why I smell burning hair?
Bear bros..we feast
>>153804569This guy's older but debuted later
WMH must be the worst fantasy pick of all time after Roga. It's just consistent mediocrity. For a guy who spends half his time in the Sanyaku he's never actually once been in a yusho race or close to it.
>>153804654Exact same record in Makushita, lol.
>>153804650Nope, sorry I farted
What drives a man (child) to keep on like this?
No...
Big fucking throw on a 200kg lardo.
>>153804670Fighting spirit.
Atami got spiked on his pointy dome
>>153804670Faustian
thankfully he's super fucking fat so his center of gravity is lower + heavy, most people would have their neck snapped landing like that
That looked like a nasty fall...
>>153804670who dis
What a twist!
that was peculiar...
Churanoumi is looking really strong this basho. He gave Zak all sorts of trouble there.
zak fucking TANKED that
>lands belly first on your skullare you surviving?
Fucking beautiful stuff
sick move from Kotozakura
>>153804698Higohikari
Beautiful
god damn zack
>on the defensive the entire bout>winshuhalso Yakuza guy in the first row looking /fa/ as fuck
>>153804710It would be extremely painful
>>153804719First time watching Zak? He won a yusho without going on the offensive once.
don't choke today dan
Wouldn't mind Kotozakura winning the tournament
>>153804723well now you cursed it
>>153804722however this is not Yokozuna sumo
>>153804723ANULO MUFA
>>153804714>85 basho in jonokuchi
>>153804739zak really falls on his skull jesus
Atami is looking good even in his losses, he might not bomb his sanyaku debut at this rate
>>153804741
>>153804739Needs an AI edit of Chura's head exploding with blood everywhere.
>>153804447> channel that actually talks about sumo instead of woooooow so i was showing this movie to my friend and thanks for the five gifted subs and wow it is good to see you proposing to your girlfriend and what the fuck speak english pls five minute tangent about chat> bannedThere's just no winning.
>>1538047434th all time, lol.
>>153804751sunday morning sumo show does okay commentary once they stop tonguing each others buttholes
>>153804751It was a bot channel dumbass.
>>153804751>No you see I need a robot of a person that spends 9 hours only talking sumo and never wavers, never takes a detour, never has a moment of life or personality within their commentary.Just watch the raw feed man
>>153804751Just watch karla from kick
>>153804757VPN > bots > gay leafs.
light work
>didn't get the mawashi>wins anywayb-bros...
Danbros we are so back
>the boys are back in townBros...
>>153804755Goose is too much of a fedora tipping Redditor for my taste. I actually prefer M*dnight over his constant superiority complex bullshit.
>>153804751VPN + ABEMA
>>153804751just watch LionSumo on youtube, no gaijin commentary
Wakabaka never looked like he had a chance
He is going to do it
T-3 minutes until fujinokawa fucking dies
my wife spotted
Aonishiki slapped the shit outta him
Fuji is about to fucking die.
>>153804775>>153804782of laughter because he gets another star
>>153804775>>153804782You're in for a rude awakening...
>>153804782He's going to wake up and find himself in the 5th row wearing a few brown vests.
So the way to beat Dan is just have an insane tachiai and fend off the left. You'll survive longer if you're huge but you're still fucked if you don't have both those two things. Sounds reasonable (not)>Fujinokawa vs OnosatoThis match is the whole reason why I'm excited for Fujinokawa fighting the Sanyaku. It's a win in my book if he doesn't get tossed immediately.
mods mindbreak Onosato right now
Holy shit it's so over
Dispensed.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
its fucking over
OH MY FUCKING GODWITH A NODOWA???
ONOSHARTO
Dai kinboshi? I've never heard that term before.
O NO NO NO NO NO SATO
O-3nosato
oof
you can fusen at any time, you're a yokozunathis is just sad
Dan in the cuck chair watching his fellow rikishi dispense of his biggest rival.
HOLLLYYYY FUCCCCCKKINNGGG SHHHIIITTTTTT
Japan's last hope...
FAT FRAUD
HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA!!!!
humiliation
Fuji's speed really is something else. Watch him on that pulldown, I've never seen a rikishi move that quickly.
>>153804814He should do it today. He's not beating Yoshinofuji tomorrow.
>>153804814>dude just run away if the going gets toughAmerican mindset
Would it have been bettee if he missed this basho to get back in good form?
>>153804757>>153804761That's what the twitch chat and end-of-day commentary are for, which he used a lot. The extra commentary like salary calculations and first matches for people were cool too.>>153804755>>153804762>>153804770Thanks, I'll check it out. Shame my VPN doesn't have a Japanese server but I'll probably pick another one soon anyway.
Someone needs to go back to November and pinpoint the exact moment Onosato's mental was destroyed. He's a completely different wrestler now.
>>153804815Exactly
I like both of those rikishi. :)
>>153804815What you talking about? Dan is probably thinking about what restaurant he'll take them after the basho. They're pretty much guaranteeing Onosato kyujos and Dan at least JY's and gets the rope. No one outside of Yoshi has anything for Dan.
>>153804814I doubt it. The JSA does not want a 3rd yokozuna. Onosato was supposed to stop Aonishiki in this basho despite his injuries. They made him appear for the emperor's sake last basho, too.
>>153804828It breaks my fucking heart. I miss him. He was so fun to watch.
>>153804828You know good and damn well that the moment it all went downhill is when he almost lost to Dan.
>>153804834>the JSA does not want [headcanon]
>>153804828He clearly is not used to losing or struggling. Weak mind
> sekitori just keep fucking falling for no reasonIs this our cardiac arrest basho?
YOSHI HENKA HOSHORYU AND MY LIFE IS YOURS
>>153804828When he fucked up his dohyoiri
>>153804825He'd look like a bitch in the eyes of the JSA but it'd probably be for the best. I doubt Kisenosato would have let him though.
Everything rides on the Mongolian to stop the white man
>>153804839I agree with this headcanon. Dude probably was on cruise control for most of his career because of his size. Now that the magnifying glass is on him he's cracking.
>>153804830
LOL
HOSH GREASED HIS LEG BEFORE THE MATCH
Horse'd.
Yoshi had the grab and then didn't know what to do with it.
not my yokozuna
Tallbros...Fatbros...What is happening? Onosato, a fucking 200 kg giant, lost to a normal-sized (small) rikishi fresh out of high school... Its over...?
That wasn't Hosh winning, that was Yoshi taking defeat from the jaws of victory. Also, was that an insane start from Yoshi or was that Hosh's tachiai being dogshit as usual?
>>153804867
>>153804867written in the stars
Mongolian brotherhood Teru making his students throw to keep this shitter a Yokozuna
i really like the security camera angle
Incredible day of sumo on the top division.Probably the most entertaining day i have ever watched, every match had something to it.Fucking incredible dayFuck i love this shit
Never call him Hoshitryu ever again.
>>153804823Facts. Especially with how Yoshi had Hosh but fucked it up at the end. He's gonna be locked in tomorrow.
>>153804880hoshoryu yushoscreencap this
Time for 10 days of nothing until Aonishiki vs Hosh
>>153804885Horse, Bear or Jester would be fantastic outcomes
>>153804884Meanwhile Hoshoryu has Fujinokawa. As much as I like the little guy, I can't see him winning there.
>>153804889Anything but the Bridge Troll is fine.
>>153804887More like 11 days of nothing before Dan gets his rope. I don't understand why anyone here thinks Hosh vs Dan is gonna go differently.
>>153804893shut the fuck up danfag
So which japanese idol should go cheer Onosato up?
>>153804896idol idol or gravure idol
>>153804890It seems completely out of character for Fujinokawa (which is a good thing) but I can see him pulling a henka on Hosh. I think Teru fuckin hates his successors so he's gonna humiliate them as much as possible.
>>153804893Pretty sure Hosh is willing to snort coke and blow his quads out before letting Dan get another win over him.
>>153804897Idol idol, he needs an actual celeb to lift his spirits up not some softcore porn actress.
>>153804897God their backs gonna be sore for a fucking week after he's done with them.
Ono needs an angry uncle on social media
>>153804900He's gonna get all the PEDs, horse milk, and "secret soup" in him to beat Dan.
>>153804901Why do no rikishi practice the art of teleportation? At first glance, it seems like a more effective technique than any other.
>>153804911That's actually covered within the "dead body" ruling so it's unusable in a tournament setting.
>>153804911obliterating your opponent with your aura seems way more effective
>>153804902Onosato's spirits will be lifted by giving backshots. A gravure idol can take that. He needs to take out his frustrations, not have someone smooth over his ego.
>>153804933Red head is a qt
>>153804828Make no mistake, it was Him.
>>153804899What has Fujinokawa got to do with Teru?
>>153804933>The look on the lady in the lower right.
>>153804897> find the east fans and find the west fans
>>153804881Bad footwork from Yoshinofuji
>>153804939At what point does one become more bandage then Sumo.
>>153804943She bet on Sato and now her ass belongs to Yakuza
>>153804692Careful. That's how that other guy landed on his neck and died.
>>153805165Atamifuji got an arm up to brace at least.
Atamifuji getting dumped on his head made me physically recoil. I hope he's alright
WakatakaKOGA got he face slapped hard like a bitch kwabajb someone make a gif out of that one
>>153804494
>>153799655I fear the reaper might finally have ol' Tom's number
>>153805418Silly yank, apehoop isn't an athletically demanding sport.
>>153805550Lol
We're going to be down half the banzuke at this rate.
>>153805247I don't see how it didn't at least damage ligaments. How did over 400lbs stop so fast?
Hosh has three wins from three losing positions, not sure if that's good or bad but probably not sustainable.Also I only watched on my phone and could tell his tachiai was years behind like usual. When I get home I'm posting the screencap
>>153805906You're right. Hoshoryu wasn't even half way touching the clay when Yoshinofuji was already going
>>153805906>his tachiai was years behind like usualIt's obviously intentional as he prefers to react to the opponent. He's had too many losses going forward and slipping.
>>153805981Yeah, when he first got the zuna promotion he was charging forward like a coked up pitbull, and he ate some bad losses because of it. He's trying to find a consistent style for him.
>>153805981Except for the last few tournaments most of his losses against lower ranks were from his late and predictable tachiai. If that's intentional it's pretty retarded from his coaches.
What days does Aonishiki compete on
>>153806405eery day
>>153806478Where do I see his bouts
>>153806543https://www.youtube.com/@sumo-video/search?query=%E5%AE%89%E9%9D%92%E9%8C%A6
>>153805981>>153806153I agree. In his first few tournaments as Zuna he got henka'd and slapped down off the tachiai (pretty sure it was to Gonoyama and Abi respectively) and dudes were just side stepping him a bunch.
Asanoyama was fucking ROBBEDI cant believe they gave that to that shitty monkey! Outrageous!Unbelievable!!! Total robbery! A crime was committed!
>>153806939He robbed himself.Basically performed some unintended charity by being too nice.
>>153806939It was the correct call, but it definitely felt a bit dirty.Should be fun seeing everyone throw Tobi into the 3rd row for the rest of the basho
Just watched the replays and those were some damn fine matches especially Zak's. On the ropes the entire match just to pull it out right at the end.I still want Dan to win so he can become a Yokozuna but failing that I'd love to see Zak take it.
>>153805418Toby Green, Todd Goldstein
>>153807150nobody tell this guy
>>153807387?
>>153807401> he doesn't know.
new>>153807511>>153807511>>153807511
I'm guessing this is within the spirit of the rules assuming his finger tips brushed the ground but isn't this quite a disparate advantage to just scoop yourself up for a launch without really taking the position requiring both fists on the shikiri-sen?
>>153807551Touching the clay isn't required.
>>153807567Your cognitive functions are regressing from staying up until 5 am to watch fat retards slapping each other around, yank.
>>153807598Whereas yours were fucked from birth due to centuries of island inbreeding. Open your eyes.
>>153807551It's not university/amateur sumo. Wrestlers are not required to be static on the line before the tachiai.
>>153804837>when he almost lost to DanHe lost to Dan, everyone saw the replay.
>>153804883Call him HorseSHITryu, Horseshoe, Horseryu, etc., but not Hoshitryu, omitting the Horse element of his BAMB name is a cardinal sin.
Two of my kachi clash picks are kyujo.
>>153807065It's a damn shame we don't get to see Teru brutalise Tobi every 2 months now.
>>153807943Look I'm happy for you that your forced horse meme has caught on, but shut the fuck up.
