huge game for both clubs today. if chelsea dont win, their champions league hopes are all but over, and if newcastle dont win, its curtains for their europa league hopesNewcastle: Ramsdale, Livramento, Thiaw, Botman, Hall, Ramsey, Willock, Woltemade, Murphy, Gordon, Barnes.Chelsea: Sanchez , Gusto, Fofana, Chalobah, Cucurella, James, Caicedo, Palmer, Enzo Fernandez, Garnacho, Joao Pedro.
Anime
are there no subs because both teams play/played midweek?
>>153862136united chads, i cant believe we have to cheer on these subhuman g*ordie cunts
at least you admit it unofficial, respect you for that
>>153862152looking at chelseas bench they may as well have no subs
>>153862174thought you would still be wanking yourself silly over wrexham?
i can see why newcastle are shit this year, look at that team, its got 2 good playerschelsea are playing their best 11 that cost like 800m and are still struggling.
>>153862230meds
>>153862267go and shit up /brit/ insteadperfect thread for attention seeking mongs like you
>>153862136What channel is this being shown on?
>>153862288trvth nvke
>>153862290does anyone under 60 have sky/cable tv in 2026? its shit and costs 50 quid a month
>>153862305I've got no intention of actually watching this match I just want to know what channel it's on.
>chelsea said jorgensen was the new number 1 keeper midweek>now hes not even in the squadstill tony but its close
We're the rentboysWe're the rentboysWe're the rentboys and we will scoreYou're not looking happy anymore!Goooooo Chelsea!
meanwhile PSG have the weekend off because they told the league they'd be taking onethe system is set up against Chelsea and it's disgusting how people just let it happen
>>153862335>it's realChelsea XI: Sanchez; Gusto, Fofana, Chalobah, Cucurella; Caicedo, James; Palmer, Fernandez, Garnacho; Joao Pedro.>Subs: Sharman-Lowe, Adarabioyo, Delap, Guiu, Hato, Lavia, Andrey Santos, Badiashile, Sarr.Newcastle XI: Ramsdale, Livramento, Thiaw, Botman, Hall, Willock, Woltemade, Ramsey, J. Murphy, Gordon, Barnes>Subs: Pope, Ruddy, Trippier, Joelinton, Wissa, Osula, Elanga, Burn, A. Murphy
>>153862335They're keeping him fresh for the ucl match. Trust the process.
>>153862305does this mean it's on sky?
>woltemade is veganneat.
>>153862288grow up and talk about the game, kid.
Tonali wants to play for title challenger, says agentSpeaking of Sandro Tonali...The Italy midfielderwants to play for a Premier League title challenger and is a "top player", according to his agent, Beppe Riso.Tonali has been linked with a summer move to clubs such as Arsenal and Manchester City. Asked by Italian outlet Calcio e Finanza if joining such a club was the Newcastle midfielder's ambition, Riso said: "Exactly, this was the objective since the moment he came to England: looking to become a top player. "I think he’s one of the most valuable players in the world right now.”Tonali is hoping to help Italy qualify for the World Cup in this month's play-offs. Asked if clubs such as Arsenal and Liverpool would be chasing Tonali if he impresses at the tournament, Riso added: "I’m not sure, but it’s very likely. "Everyone’s waiting for the World Cup, then a thousand situations could arrive. But everything would start after the World Cup.”
>>153862438You couldn't even talk about the other one: >>153862337Five years plus of this shiteYou're fucking warped m8
>>153862462why does he do it, does he get sexual pleasure from being a lolcow?
>>153862462that's not me you physcho
>>153862456Newcastle are challenging for the title, they bought some amazing players in the summer
>>153862474the title of kwaboty maybe
>>153862466It's an ego trip.
>>153862462wait thread autist had made these threads for 5 years now?
>Howe: Tindall and I are like a married couple... I won't tell you who does what!
>>153862456He says this shit every few months
>>153862551Thread autist is NOT the matchthread creator for FUCKS SAKE
>>153862552gay Sex arse !!
>>153862552Tindall annoys me as much as the set piece guy in the Arsenal team. Sit the fuck down man
>>153862593
>>153862566relax pal he learned English through dubbed anime not everything is going to click right away
another Woltemade midfield masterclass incoming
lets go
>>153862551No, he's been passive-aggressive commenting on threads since December 2021 as he pointed out himself here: >>153850162>>153862566And that confusion is exactly what thread autist wants. He acts a cunt but someone else gets the blame instead, and then he spends his time crying and wanting to make friends with that someone else. He is a total fucking freak.
i can see sandcastle getting something here, chelsea are in a spiral right now
The fuck is there an old man there as an mascot?!
>>153862802thats alan shearer mate
ramadanbros
>>153862802That is Steve Bruce
LLMAOOOOOOOOOO wtf is this
>>153862824would
lmao?
>>153862824>that look at 16-17syou just know
>>153862824A nigga like me would have been molesting her like that one guy in the world cup I think it was
um referee is the 12th man
messi level rigging
Why aren't you guys over in the Arsenal v Everton thread?
>>153862921>10 postsbleak.
>>153862921was going to make a snoozefest derby joke but that would be disrespectful towards Everton
Newcastle make me laugh. Well funny
>>153862921>watching artetaball when literally any other footy is onshan't
It`s LovelyhereIn Fulham ..
>>153862921I'll jump in their containment general when everton score to laugh but that's the most I can do, anon.
>>153862921referee is playing for chelsea want to see him score a goal
>>153862945BASED
>>153862873somehow missed this rigi moment kek
>>153862945>carlinggrim.
>>153862960lmao what is going on here
>>153862960kino
>>153862931>>153862929You're missing the literal best team in the world to watch this slop match
>james
>GARNACHO>>153862973>rating everton that highly
>>153862960Rosenior has some high-level strategies
>warm palms
>>153862996exactly what i was thinking. only a complete idiot would come up with this.
cant score
Cruella is gonna punch Garnacho before this game is over.
>garnacho
that could have given palmer brain damage if he had one
That hit made Palmer more or less retarded?
Kek
>>153862960my reffies never fail
Why does Cole Palmer look like that?
Media doesn't give Palmer anywhere near enough abuseNone at all, in fact
kwab
>>153863038If he was black they'd have him hung, drawn and quartered
>>153862945i was at the burnley game 3 weeks ago. harrowing to know another /brit/ user could have been there
>lelsea
apologise
time to circle the ref again until he disallows the goal
CLARE BALDINGRENT BOYS BTFO
>literally dribble into the netKwab
>that goalhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4XglR2LSE28
Holy shit Fofana is THE laziest jogger I have ever seen
>>153863059>brit/ post covidnobody does this
2nd open play goal in 14 months KEK
>>153862136
Fofana is such a lazy cunt.
Chelshit
Chelsea wont win another game this season, theyve given up
>club world cup winnerswhat is this
THE FANS ARE TURNING ON THEM
>>153863097Maybe having atleast one defender with a brain would be a good idea.
>>153863114Preseason friendly winners?
What's your favourite Chelsea chant? Mine is>COME ON CHELSEA, COME ON CHELSEAor>CHELSEAAA, CHELSEAAA
>fofanawhat's his iq? no higher than 60 i'd wager
fofana cost £70m
Conceding first is the plan
wtf should be a red now i understand why ref was in the chelsea huddle
>>153862973KLENK
>>153862824why do they make little girls wear thatsurely they don't need to be "modest"
>>153863169Worshiping the white man, its gonna be our year boys.
>>153863133for me its WORLD CHAMIPIONS, PRE-SEASON WORLD CHAMPIONS
>>153863166you underestimate mohammedan noncery then
>>153862960lmao
>>153863133Do you think these Chelsea fans even chant like that at all?
>>153863195Stamford Bridge has "no talking" and "please keep quiet" signs all around its interior
>>153863195me on the right
>>153863133For me it's Chelsea Chelsea Chelsea Chelsea Chelsea Chelsea Chelsea
>>153863169What in the name of all fuck is going on here?
>rent boys lose>arsenal lose>wet spam win>spuds get bumraped tomorrowI live in hope
>>153863233They always meet in the middle to huddle and the ref just refused to move I guess
I enjoy how everyone hates Garnacho
>>153863195The two wearing the headscarves must have terminal cancer.
>>153863243kek, very weird.
>>153863243Not surprised it's Tierney being a sperg
Chelsea playing without a right winger is funny Meanwhile United is playing without a left winger
>>153863244He's been their best player so far today, had loads of the ball
>Ramsey, Willock, WoltemadeNo team should struggle against this midfield
>>153863243He looked at Palmer to reason with him and there was absolutely fuck all behind the eyes
ERAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
HOWEVAR
CLEAR PEN REF PLAYING FOR CHELSEA
no era
>holds a players shirt>player he's holding grabs him back to force him off>flopGlad the ref didn't fall for it this time, Chelsea have been fucked over by that bullshit before.
That type of pen only gets given to the home team
>>153863309both fouling each other
>>153863316Rent boy, how much are you charging these days?
boooooo
BOOOOOOOOOOO
Ramadan break
reau-sin-rioux bros how we feeling?
>>153863323rent boy
Why are we stopping the game for this Islamic bullshit? How woke is this joke of a league now?
Absolutely sloppa kek
> 179 vs 180
Can't wait 7 minutes for half time MUST HAVE BREAK NOW
>>153863347brutal mog
>8 minutes until half timetotally not a humiliation ritual though
>>153863327>soliciting for gay sex lmao yeah youve really done him there gayboy
BOOOOO BOOOO BOOO THE PAKI MUSLIM FAST FUCK ISLAM MUHAMMED IS A PAEDO
Newcastle cheating like madSmall teams always get away with this at Stamford Bridge
oh its time to do the performative """fast""" break BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
>>153863354It is disruptive by design
Ramadan fast break
Who's Muslim in the current lineup??
>>153863358I'm not soliciting him you ugly rat-faced nigger
Thiaw and Willock for NewcastleEveryone for Chelsea
>>153863360>small teamsSo like Chelsea then?
>>153863367rattled. try vivastreet not 4chan
wait does god really let them break their fast if they're playing football?
Oh, yeah, it was Ramadan at his place today, but he's no Muslim.
Chris Sutton is such a miserable cunt
GOAL 1-1 EDDIE HOWE OG
>struggling this hard against Newcastle B teamThe fuck
>>153863406wtf spoilermy stream is 40 mins behind
>>153863406HAHAHAHA THIS IS SO FUNNY. I CAN'T STOP KLENKING AND KEKKING AND KLOKKING HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA
> early suicide notes
>>153863426stop kvetching you stupid kike we are watching the game here
>>153863456klenk
>>153863443>4 colour ballpointHow can anyone use this without constantly fiddling with them?
huge breaking news
Why is James playing on the left of the pitch? His whole game is crossing the ball.
>>153863486Karl Pilkington's Dad's put another Forrest Gump fella in a wheelie bin
>>153863470confirmed homosexual
>>153863486Vax status?
>>153863493You watching through a mirror?
The performative ramadan shit is masterful ragebait from the elites. Lowkenuinely should be enough to make me quit watching football, but I think I will just store my anger inside until it’s time to smite the mohammedans on judgement day
Neo-Newcastle is about to E X P L O D E
>>153863486>>153863523I can’t see the word wheelie bin and not think of that story, XFM broke me.Also, I reckon that the XFM show has to be one of the most beloved pieces of media to exist. I don’t know a single person that has listened to it and not found it hilarious.
>>153863552>must play on the sabbath>must play on Shabbat>must play on fucking Easter Sunday>can't wait 7 minutes to break the fast at half time, must do it on the pitch
It feels somehow wrong and dirty that Newcastle take the lead and then don't concede an immediate equalizer.
Commentator on 5 Live compared Paul Tierney to Donald Trump over that pre-match scene Chappers asked what he meant and then he said "being somewhere he shouldn't be" only for Chappers to get all nervous
Are we doing halftime slags? Need to know asap lads
>>153863570I will never not hate Sony/Crunchy Roll for buying Manga Entertainment out and killing the brand.
>>153863593>being somewhere he shouldn't beRef always stands on centre circle with ball though, idk if they asked him to move or not wouldnt surprised me if they did and he refused because refs are 5 miles up their own arse
>>153863581>cancelling games is the same as a 30 second drink breakwhat?
>>153863587Lost our soul
half time infiniti
Gladiators is on after the match.
Chelsea to win 10-1, may a cute femboy come and suck me off if I'm wrong
>chelsea looking promising on the attack2-0 soon
>>153863574I used to base my entire personality around that show
>>153863243>...he's right behind me isn't he
>>153863720Based, I still do
>>153863695This is a solid bet imo
>>153863690we WILL be there
>>153863743It's a shame she got injured.
This is mafia fixed match
Delap is the new Francis Jeffers, the "promising young English striker who gets a move to a big club, gets relentlessly overhyped and then never scores more than 5 goals a season"
>>153863779he should have gone to everton or something like thatpossession football doesn't suit him
>>1538637795 is looking pretty optimistic now, cant see him being there after summer
While we all wait for something to happen, let's talk about tomorrow. Will Spurs win, and if so, by how many?
>>153863779he's be banging in 13 a year if he didn't have the second best striker in the world ahead of him
>>153863800If we get through the match without something insane happening to us it'll be a miracleUnironically we weren't bad against atletico, scoreline aside lel
>>153863800literally half their squad is missingthey're going to get fucked
>>153863812But Gyokeres plays for Arsenal
>>153862960
>>153863827thought he was shoved to midfield
>>153863743unless she gets naked like the women in picrel, not interested
guys what should i order today my bank acc is nearly empty. want to make it 0 and enjoy 1 more big meal. so pizza, burger box, kebab, or any suggestions? thanks x
>>153863833palmer's face lel
Cold palmer (p) is coming
>>153863844>low on money>still ordering takeawayswhy do people do this
>Playing between CL legsISHIGGYDIGGYDOO
> kwabnchez
>>153863844Find an independent burger place that isn't a virtual kitchen
>>153863867tinpot league
>>153863842if only
>>153863850kek what a ridiculous comb over, why doesn't he shave it off?
>>153863886>broad shoulders>no titsAre you niggas gay or summat?
>>153863886>no boobiesgrimgrimgrim
>>153863844pizza x
newcastle fans have ideas well above their station
>caicedoHOW MUCH?!
>>153863899This is a Chelsea thread lad
>>153863862ALMOST
wowwhat a dive
penal
Rosenior's having a melty
>
rosenior has lost the locker room
Delap should be pouring concrete on a construction site in Grimsby
>>153863906how so?
Why does every single attack have to go through Garnacho? All it is doing is adding another pass and slowing things down.
>>153863949why isnt poof palmer yellow carded for diving swarthy rat
The problem with Chelsea is they always try and walk it in
Watching Chelsea is like a 90 minutes edging session
this nigga is really called labia? KEKAROO
Woltemade keeps trying to do the haaland style kick back at midfield and sprint forward, yet his passes never get to a good place
newcastle winning this would be problematic. expecting another rosenior bbc sport interview on monday complaining about racism
chelsea are so toothless
this nigga is really called joe linton? KEKAROO
>>153863946> rosenior
Joao Pedro, what a blanker
>>153864012He claps like he's a bit *zesty*
whew
>>153863984Watching Chelsea is like edging to a terrible JAVRight when you're right there after so long, it switches to a long shot of an ugly old guy's arse.
I can never take this guy seriouslyHe looks like a maths teacher
>>153863949era
"As things stand, this result injects new life into Newcastle bid to qualify for CL.They would be up to 9th with a win and moving six points behind Chelsea with eight games remaining.Meanwhile, with Man Utd and Aston Villa playing each other tomorrow, this is urrently an opportunity missed for Chelsea.''
>delap
>>153863950There's never any locker room to lose in Chelsea because there isnt one in the first place, the moment the players lose one game they start trying to kill each other behind the scenes and throw the manager into the garbage can and do whatever they want.This could have been fixed by not hiring 60000 young bucks and hiring some vets older than 25 to drive them along the way.
>>153864012bro thinks hes tuff
Why are there 2 games at 5.30?
>>153864024did they ever catch that rascal the time bandit?
>>153864052Don't worry, the ownership hears you>*proceeds to signs a 19 year old winger and a 17 year old keeper*
>>153864052true
arsenal once again failing to break away from citywhat a bunch of shitters
>>153864066because of woke
Asian women really are just better
Have they tried shooting? Often works
How is Delap even real lmao
>DELAPsend him back to ipswich
Delap definitely in the top 3 worse signings for Cehlsea ever, no?
>>153864090Could you imagine if porn wasn't illegal in Korea?
>>153864090who wants to have asian kids?
liam delap is proper wank isnt he
delap is the white forlan
>>153864079How does one attain this physique?
>>153864110Sutton, Bogard, Shevchenko
Hope that niggas injury is career ending
>>153864110>Mutu scored 6 goals
>>153864110torresthat ukranian winger i forgot his nameadrian mutu
>>153864156Mutu was good, he was just a druggie.
>>153864159Mikhail Mudryk
>>153864110theyve had so many its impossible to saynkunku has been just as dogshit but cost 60m
ant and dec spotted
>>153864159Nah, Torres' goal against Barca justified his transfer. He also did a bunch outside of shots
>>153864110DjilobodjiBuonanotteLukaku
>>153864169Mykhailo Mudkip
>>153864186of The Overlap fame
>>153864159Torres underachieved but far from worst
No but really Mudryk played like a Sunday league player and costed Chelsea nearly 100m, of all the over-the-top signings they made from that 2023 transfer window, Mudryk was the worst. Every time he entered the pitch he made the team play much worse than they already were and this was while he was DOPING. IMAGINE how much, much worse he could be playing without being on roids.The only remarkable thing he's ever done is overshoot a cross like a retard and scaring Raya with it to the point he turned that cross into a goal.
>people doomposting newcastle schedule>beat manutd>should've beaten barca>going to beat chelsea
>>153864238very funny player though
Would really love to see a newcastle player fall over and die
Why do most modern zoomer footballers look like twinks
What’s on the note?
>>153864250Yeah but we've also been losing loads of players to fatigue and injury. We need Miley back at least.
Sorry lads it was my fault for moving captaincy from Haaland to Pedro
>>153864272'we're both shite'
>>153864264They dont eat a lot of protein and build muscle mass most just go with a lean diet with junk food on the weekends, or sometimes they only eat some junk food and spend 18-20 hours of their day without eating another meal.
>>153864272Remember the prostitute-phone-in-box legends from Chelsea in the 00s?
>>153864272ageing men
>>153864264estrogen in the water
late rigi incoming
>>153864288>18-20 hours without consuming a mealNo way
Garnizzy - hit or shit? What do we think?
GOALFUCK
>black newcastle fanrare
>>153864340Ffs
>neverton
> +8
>>153864305
>+8UNTIL CHELSEA SCORE
>>153864348utter woke nonsense
>>153864394I don't want to be up to 2am watching this shit
garnacho is the least threatening winger i've ever seen
>plus eightHUH
>>153864334He's world-class
>>153864388over
imagine having liam rosenior as your managerlol
The age of men...
woke nonsense
newcastle are gonna finish above chelsea by the end of the season, players gave up when maresca was sacked
Reminder: the jews never ruined football, it’s only been shit since the arab, qatari, emirati niggers took over the entertainment industry.
where has the clock gone
>>153864504Maresca made them play like utter shit lets not start this up.
>>153864517THE GAME WILL CONTINUE UNTIL CHELSEA WIN
>chelshit
Why are they sitting opposite each other behind the goal
>>153864610Ramadan, needed to see FIRST THING when the sun goes down.
Chelsea used to have an incredible defense, kinda wild how they failed to properly replace it.
>>153864683Mate it's been like a decade since you had John Terry. Let it go.
>>153864610meditating
>>153864610at that level of football it's highly likely they'll be too tempted to watch the football, so it instils a stasi-like surveillance system whereby you aren't watching the football and you're making sure the guy next to you isn't watching either
