>He is still raising his corpses into zombies when skeletons are better in nearly every metric and their creation leads to materials you can feed to any bound demons you might control or repurpose into flesh golems.New liches think that just because they've lived their second century means that they're hot shit and then go on to do stupid crap like this.
>>93395713Dumb elitist takeSure, skeletons are awesome, but raising them is a pretty involved process; unless you're already running a ziggurat with a few attendants and cultists, you're not gonna be pumping out the kind of numbers you need to get anything doneMaybe your lich sugar daddy can afford to get you a couple dozen thralls to do the rituals for you while you go torture the living, but to the salt-of-the-earth necromancer, the humble SELF REPLICATING zombie is the lynchpin of a decent corruption effortPop a couple inside a village; by morning you've got twenty of them !Sure they smell and they're clumsy, but for most of the stuff you ask of an army of the dead, skeletons are frankly overkill, I'd rather dress em up in armor and put them to strategic use (and not have to spend a fortnight after every massacre raising them back up by hand) while the zombie horde that requires basically no upkeep does the legwork of devastationWORK SMARTER NOT HARDER
Skeletons and zombies are quick solutions for the beginner that doesn't take pride in his work. Any two-copper hedge necromancer can go dabble a pentagram in a graveyard and mass-weave unholy life into the remains. A decent necromancer worth his demonic salts knows that a horde of flesh abominations carefully sewn together by hand and lovingly reanimated in a gothic castle is the way to go in this day and age. No mass-produced low-tier crap that just falls apart as soon as they encounter a decent militia but handcrafted fleshbeast strike teams fully customized for the sole purpose of spreading as much fear and chaos as possible. >mfw newbie necromancers gets uppity and think their McSkeletons or Zombie Combos are clever.
This >>93396077 anon's right about hand-stitched creations, but not for the reasons he stated. For the same HD price of a zombie, you can dismantle and reassemble a few brigand corpses to make a multi-legged necrocraft that is at once a beast of burden and a piece of mobile battle furniture. There is nothing quite like bullying terrified adventures from the comfort of a crawling sofa.
>>93395713>not building golems insteadCall me when you reach the big leagues.
>>93395713>he doesn't raise lichesNgmi
>>93395996If you keep that mindset you'll never rise to your true potential. What kind of necromancer thinks of themselves as salt-of-the-earth? You should be proud of stepping onto the path of conquering death, yet here you are making excuses about your inability to prepare a few robust and reliable skeletons. Back when I was starting out all I needed to raze a village or two were my two trusted axe wielders and my horde of skeleton rats to smoke out anyone hiding.>>93396077>>93396176Fleshbeasts are a pain in the ass to feed and maintain if they're your main force. Obviously skeletons are no wights, revenants or greater cryptstalkers, not to mention yama princes, but they're much more reliable and sustainable than fleshbeasts on a larger scale.
>>93396705>Fleshbeasts are a pain in the ass to feed and maintain if they're your main force
>>93396705>Fleshbeasts are a pain in the ass to feed and maintain if they're your main force.That's why I mentioned necrocrafts: start off with fresh parts, preserve them as you stitch, and the result is a mindless undead with no upkeep. You do have to remember not to leave them in the sunlight for extended periods of time and don't forget to set aside a pair of arms for upper support. After all, what good is a creeping couch without a drink holder?Now, I can't speak to fielding normal fleshbeasts as strikers or vanguard since I usually stick to hidden skeleton archers with a few simple demon frontliners (don't even bother with weapons for them, just armor and shield). You have to admit though, fleshbeasts are great for rear overwatch and enemy scout retrieval.
>>93395713Its like you don't even want a free murder of zombie crows to herald your undead hordes, infect the unwary and spot for you.
>>93396388>Power LichesTheir revival tour will be brütal.
Remember well the lessons of Orcus's city of Tsar, who defended in siege against the great armies of light. Not content were they to simply raise the dead as skeleton or zombie.Each corpse was put through a rigorous process to produce as many undead as possible:- First, torment and torture the captive or spirit to create a angry ghost or shadow.- At the necromancers discretion, remove the hands and animate them as crawling hands. Though this denies the rest of the undead created from this process hands themselves, forcing them to use hooks or stump-mounted blades.- Next, remove the blood, heart, and organs to pay devils or fuel necrotic experiments: scampering animate spleens and choking intestines make for a mean surprise in dark environ.- Carefully remove the skin, then stitch it back up, sealing any orifices with tar or wax, then fill the insides with sand and small rocks. Animate the flesh for a slow but sturdy soldier.- Carefully separate the skeleton from the cadaver's meat, preserving the musculature. Replace the removed bones with wooden or metal rods. Animate the meat as though you would a zombie. For best results, bandaging or armoring the resulting form will help it stay together.- Strengthen the skeleton by use of nails, rivets and bits of wire, then animate it as usual. Consider leaving the skeleton with their brain intact to create a more fiercely cunning specimen.- Arm and armor as appropriate.As you can see, efficient use of one cadaver or prisoner can produce a half dozen undead minions where wasteful use sees but one.Highly skilled or desperate necromancers may be able to draw out even this number by replacing as much of a skeleton's form with wood and metal rods or a creature's skin with stitched hide and cloth as the animation can bear. The swapped out components can then be assembled into further monstrosities.Indeed, it was said that even in the heights of their need Tsar never lacked for soldiers to stand vigil on their bleak walls.
Pah. Zombies, this, skeletons, that. Fleshbeasts and wraiths and revenants, et cetera, it is all such a ponderous, nay, dolorous waste of potential. The proper necromancer understands that death is sufficient, there need be no un, rather, by the working of simple blight on captive rats, caught and then released, untold scores upon scores of simpleton peasants can be eradicated from this plane. For all the effort and attention that a petty mob of carcasses can muster, they are a stumbling and vacuous host held against even the pettiest of devotees inured to plagues. Turn your hollow eye sockets to the statistics, the histories, and know that I speak true. If you want results in the struggle against the taint of conscious life, contagious blight is best. Accept no substitutes.
>>93395713>Still raising corpses>Rather than investing in Ghouls, Shades, Spectrers, or even goddamn motherfucking Vampires that make more of themselves by existing.If you have one skeleton OR Zombie, you have one corpse animated at your command. If you have one Wight, you're going to get more if you use it right, and if you have 10 Wights, you're likely to have 50 by the end of the nearest rural town's population. Honestly I know Anatomy is the main mundane course for Necromancy's degrees but did you kids just Skip basic math and finance?
>>93395713>Study magical contracts to make deals with extraplanars>Realize it is a losing game >Switch majors to Necromancy, thats where the money is>Dime a dozen liches flooding the corpse market, can barely get any high quality materials>Peasants have been catching on and have started cremating remains>Turn to selling services for coin>Highered to perform seances and revive recently deceased loved ones, as that all a necromancer is good for these days>Get idea, begin demanding debt contracts as payment>Grief stricken people don't think rationally, sign away for a chance to see their loved ones again>Living thralls don't register on a paladins senses>Get all the servants I could want, are more intelligent than undead and don't stink up the place>Still get their souls after they die
It takes at least 500 years to truly comprehend the tactical and ontological superiority of skeletons. Anyone younger who tries to talk about skeletons is a poseur. Let them go through their zombie apocalypse phase, it's perfectly natural, they're on the right track.
You guys always go for quantity. Me I'm heading over to that new exhibit in the natural history museum. You think an army is nice but wait till you see what happens when your foes get a glimpse of Lenin riding a zombie t-rex into battle.
>>93395713Aspiring Necromancer here. So if I just skip the zombies part and go to skeletons what's next after it? Or is just constant skeletons now?
>>93402533Multiskeleton centipedesExotic skeletonsMismatched species skeletonsHand-sculpted skeletonsShrine-carved skeletonsMobile base skeletonsOr emo phase for incorporeals, hooded spooks. You AIM the direction of your craft, Skelebro. Just skeleton lost shock value, and necromancy while it's arcane it's still art. Gotta shock, Gotta awe, Gotta Keep them in admiring loops
>>93395713>>93395996>>93396077I like crawling hands.
>>93402533The thing to remember about basic bitch shambling zombies is that they are situational: cannon fodder, distractions, and non-traditional reconnaissance.Beyond skeletons and zombies, you've got:- floating severed heads useable immediately as couriers, scouts, and commanders or can be specialized for assault and sabotage- crawling hands are underrated scouts and assassins- hand-stitched abominations are go-to solutions for specialized bodyguards and reserve cavalry- animated flayed skin is a very effective thief deterrent as it often elects to just crawl along the walls and ceilings- ectoplasm-based entities such as ghosts are advanced scouts and a handful can easily scatter unprepared troops- for the advanced necromancer, reanimating fiend corpses or parts will yield superior specimens and brings unexpected insight regarding flesh preservationAdditionally, it's important to field occasional constructs that resemble undead to disrupt anti-undead specialists.
>>93395713How to tell if a necromancer is a virgin who has never had a blowjob from a skeleton. Never again bonefag.
>>93395996elitism is based and only second rate bone diddlers who are afraid of excellence say otherwise.>>93395713retard. Skeletons and zombies have their own unique applicative uses. what sort of chessmaster doesnt use his pawns at all and just used his Bishops, knights, etc?A bad one that’s who.Zombies are excellent low cost moral breakers. Between the scent of rotting flesh and seeing the half desiccated faces of loved ones. There is also more meat on them to act as meat sheilds. The humble zombie is a useful playing piece from your humble single grave reserector, to your Vecnas. Its about using your pieces well, not just making your biggest monster.then you got THESE kinds of blowhards >>93396077 who spend a century or two making sure every golden cow husk is perfectly reconstructed to assauly some 30 person thorp or hobbit hole.Its about resource allocation, not all or nothing. Fucking newfags probably dont even have all of their flesh desiccated off yet.
>>93403580Fucking handfags always parading their kink around
My mummy turned out weird, what did I do wrong?
>>93402533The next step is where you can truly start to experiment and in some cases start to specialize.. Some people never get past variant zombies an skeletons or just bigger undead. (And that's fine in some situations). But don't be afraid to screw around and find out what works best for you and more importantly what you enjoy. Some people like to bind ghosts to armor. Others like to stich creatures together. Some even use alchemy to create tailor made beasts that won't survive the alchemical vat that spawned them only to give them unlife. Go nuts.That said the next "traditional" upgrade from my experience is usually (but not always) ghouls. You have to be carful with that though because if you don't have it under control after you raise it a ghoul can fuck you up.
>>93396077>fleshshitterOh gee yeah let's just use the stuff on a guy that's not only vulnerable to slashing weapons but fire too. Bones aren't much better with their brittle mace weakness. No, if you're not summoning spectres to handle your foes you're summoning liabilities that will eventually be the end of you, while spooks are multi-useful with the ability to possess, curse or simply act as invisible/wall-phased scouts and recon.
>>93401612But if the dinosaur skeleton is so old that it has actually turned to stone by fossilization, would it be more like a stone golem then?? You sure you can animate that? Huh?
my zombies are addicted to vinegar what do I do my mellified men couldn't come up with a solution
>>93395713Something I've been doing is "priming" villages.I add some magical poison into their water so that their livestock and the villagers themselves slowly build up a small charge of necrotic energy, once these charges get close together, they burst and trigger a zombification process. Since this is a little more complex than the usual process, i need to draw some runes on common gathering places like their homes, a town hall or bars. Most commonly I do this on their roof.After they explode into zombies, I harvest their flesh into a flesh golem, and leave the bones for my regular skeleton army.
>>93405763Nothing ever got reanimated by just staying where it is.
>>93403580...Teddy, a crawling hand is just zombie leftovers. You couldn't even say something respectable, like ghosts?
>>93395713Guys, there's a paladin who's after my phylactery (he'll never find it) who I recently found out is a closeted skelephile (I won't say how I found out). How should I use this knowledge against him?
>>93406388Are you serious? Isn't the answer obvious? Skeleduction.
Honestly I feel like I’m surrounded by amateurs when nobody realizes the hidden gems that Blood Elementals are.Though I also like having a monopoly in the business, and vampires are pretty avid clients.
>>93406772there's not much to realize, they come free with most types of undead, (especially mummies) so unless you're wasting the material on blood golems from improper storage you're going to end up with a lot of themI love mummies, they're so versatile depending on what you preserve them with
>>93406910Yeah, but it’s part of the charm! Being easy to make (easier than raising a whole cemetery if you ask me), way stronger than a horde and it gains strength when killing. Plus it’s cheap! Blood of evil people and water from the lungs of the drowned.Honestly it’s a no-brainer!Mummies are cool, though most are made with divine intervention, which I’m not a fan
>>93406995kingdoms pay exorbitant amounts for just one mellified man let alone the several dozen it takes for proper coverage, it's great for relations and it immediately makes the paladins and clerics mark them as enemies which is hilarious every time
I got a message from my kingdom's Queen Regent today via her lady-in-waiting approaching in secret. Apparently the sole heir died and she wants me to revive him. The issue is that he is still a kid and I'm pretty sure they are expecting him to be fully revived, able to grow to maturity and all.This could be my chance to make some big plays for power as necromancy is heretical over here but I'm stuck on what to do. The body is still fresh so that should help but I'm just a novice in these arts all things considered.Also should I move out of this crypt? If the Royal Servants are able to find me that seems like it could be a problem. especially if things go wrong.
>>93407272That is a whole pile of problems waiting to happen. I recommend you revive the boy, get paid, and get out of dodge before they realize that he's still a corpse.
>>93407272if it were me I'd teach him the secrets of flesh so he could have mysterious "growth spurts" and keep himself looking not undead once he's learned enough to stop relying on youhim being a lich would be more impactful than just a regular walking corpse anywayand you should get out ASAP when he stops needing you because that's a recipe for disaster no matter what you do
Zombies are okay because they can absorb damage better. Even after your zombie legion absorbs a few fireballs some will still be standing because of their nature and your enemy will have that many fewer slots. Skeletons not so much but Shortbow Proficiency is much, much more offensively effective. Any decent Necromancer of Name Level knows the minions who get shit done are the Magens.
>>93407272If your going to stay for the long haul and are able to keep the kid sentient and sane you could just put his brain in a new body every few years. You would have to use magic to make sure the boy looks similar but t's an option.Might want to look for way's to make him seem alive and possibly teach the kid necromancy if you have the chance.
>>93407301>>93407348>>93407532Understood, I think I'm going to play it relatively safe. My tenative offer in the response letter is going to be.>Return the Prince to life>Teach the Queen Regent the secrets needed to let her son age and maintain him (soul manipulation and fleshcrafting)But in return I get>Full Access to any resources I ask for>Access to the Royal Library for any magic secrets they might have>Immunity to depart once my work is doneMy idea is that teaching the Queen Regent is going to take at least a year if not more and the fact that she is willing to go this far means if I push her a bit farther she will be so deep into it that their will be no chance of her backing out due to sunk cost. And by only teaching her what is exactly needed I have less risk of her overtaking me and coming for my head.Then during that time I can load up on royal arcane secrets and if I slip a binding into the animation spell that makes it so until I leave the Kingdom if I am destroyed the prince is destroyed.I prefer that to teaching the directly prince as again he is still a kid and the effort needed will mean I am going to be stuck in it longer, which means the chances of it going wrong increase.Sound good to you guys?
>>93407272>if the queen regent is trustworthyBe upfront about your limitations and offer to preserve the body until a healer with those skills can make the journey. If you're worried about the soul drifting off, try growing a homunculus and leaving it inert for the boy to possess. This is especially useful if the kid died of natural causes as that tends to make weaker resurrections fail. It's possible to leave the soul near the body so that it's just invigorated enough to harvest some flesh to grow a clone, but that's advanced stuff and I doubt your client is willing to wait.>if the queen regent has a reputation for backstabbingIf you even suspect you're at risk, >>93407301 this is proper approach.
>be me>sitting in my crypt>chilling with my skelebros and prank scrying faggot wizards>Stacy big clavicle scrys me up>tells me there's a cool party going on at Chad thunderbones tomb and I should come>tells me to bring my skeletons too>super excited because I can finally show off my cool ass bone golems to Stacy big clavicle. She'll be sure to think I'm cool after that.>show up at Chad thunderbones tomb and nock on the rune carved door.>it opens but everything is covered in a darkness spell. Whatever it's probably just for some cool illusion light show or something. >go inside. The darkness spell ends and five flesh golems roll giant boulders at me and my skeletons.>I dive out of the way but my skeletons are hit and they fall apart. >it sounds like a xylophone factory just exploded.>"Hahahah holy fuck did you hear that guy's!" Chad thunderbones laughs.>Tyrone bigbone is rolling on the floor laughing>Stacy big clavicle is giggling with all her bitch ass becky necromancers.>I literally die from embarrassment and reform in my crypt.>find out the whole thing was scryed directly to the weave and literally every one with a crystal ball saw it.How the fuck do I recover from this?
>>93407832>Disguise yourself as a normal Wizard.>Send Adventurers on a series of quests to take care of them for you, if their are any sources of power you explicitly want have them grab it for you on the way out.>After the adventurers do their job roll in and loots whatever is left over.>One your vengeance is complete use your gathered power to slay the adventurers as to tie up any lose ends.That should get the job done.
>>93407832>>93407927Surprisingly parallel to Vecna's origin
>>93395713You should use every part of the corpse, like a Native American.>remove the bones to make a skeleton>drain the blood and other fluids to make a horrific animated ichor>flay the skin to make a hide of smothering>mold the meat into a flesh golem>extract the nervous system to make floating brain webs that serve well as scoutsCan even get more creative with specific things. Adventurers shit their whole selves if they see their buddy get strangled by a giant snake made out of thirteen digestive tracts fused together.
>>93398684Wights are too prone to blowing up before they even reach their intended suicide-bomb target. No thanks.
>>93395713>>93401548Indeed, good sirs. Skeletons are the only undead fit for high society. After all, what good is it being a Necromancer without a neck to romance?>>93403978Fool! Well-dressed and properly mannered skeletons that deftly serve under your direct command is how you start romancing the necks of fair maidens in the first place, resulting in the finest of virgins becoming yours to educate in the pleasurable arts.
>>93406995Mummies are too tedious. They take too damn long. They're fine for passion projects, but impractical unless you've got some kind of impenetrable mausoleum to keep them undisturbed for centuries in. Too long a game, and too much to go wrong. Meanwhile, all it takes to properly clean a skeleton you can find in any grave anywhere are carrion beetles.
>>93410008yeah they take centuries but they require (almost) no maintenance after you set them up to waitusing regular mummies is a waste anyway, you're supposed to experiment with them to create all kinds of mummies with different abilities, my favorite is >>93407125 since medical undead are an untapped niche and can easily displace clerics if you use them rightI've been trying new batch that uses alcohol and vinegar and it's being a bit of a pain though
>>93395713Skeleton warriors are better because they're former warriors with weapons but you have to go looking for their graves. Zombies can be made from any newly dead civilians.
>>93395713Soulfire take, but Deathknights and Dullahans. This is the enlightened state of being you will reach after making it through all your zombie, fleshbeast, skeleton, etc. phases. It's not the most cheap option and takes time, but this goes out to all the up- and coming necromancers - There is nothing quite like raising your first undead champion. That singular moment when inexperienced adventurers decide they can probably take that one slightly bigger undead in armor is like a finely aged bloodwine. Plus, undead champions are intelligent, they pretty much maintain themselves, you can send them out on quests and they make for much better conversations in your eternal existence of dark seclusion than zombies or skeletons.But how to get undead champions? This may make it sound easier than it is, but technically all you really have to do is whisper dark secrets into the ears of men (flyers also work), until you eventually have a few lone heroes you can bestow a cursed runesword on with which they may>overcome even death itselfin their quest to slay another great evil. Then they will get mortally wounded but the dark powers of the sword will keep them going, until they complete their goal and eventually succumb. And voila, now their body and soul is eternally bound in service to you. Of course there is the tiny chance that they occasionally regain their free will and plot revenge against you, especially after you (accidentally) made them slaughter their former loved ones, but the upsides are really worth the risk.
FELLAIF YOU CAN'T SOLVE IT WITH MORE SKELETONS YOU AREN'T MUCH OF A LICH IN MY OPINIONI REMEMBER WHEN IT WAS MUCH MORE SIMPLE BACK IN THE DAYS OF SAVE OR DIE WHEN 18 WAS A HIGH CON SCORE LOL :rofl:JUST MAKE MORE SKELETONS AND THAT'LL BE ALL YOU NEED I GUARANTEE ITALSO Z'JAKK THE FOUL U CALLED ME WANTING 2 TRADE MY CROWN OF EVIL FOR UR SPHERE OF ANNIHILATION IF U DON'T CALL BACK SOON I HAVE OTHER OFFERS----------------------------------------------------------------------Garbor the Infernal'63 Skeletal dragon"Undead bone better""If you can't stand before our undead troops then feel free to join them""Evil wizards these days just want a lair but don't want to put in the work to make one"Proud supporter of Israel:2wands:Sent from my scying orb using Tapatalk
>>93402533easy, from there you form a cult of desperate or power-hungry mortals who spend their entire lives cultivating their mind and bodies for eternal service to you in exchange for petty favorseveryone's used to dealing with skeletons so they're never prepared for the kung-fu master skeletons that can spend eternity cultivating negative karma in your name
>>93412967>Thinking that an army filled with trash cultivating the Negative Yin Worship Art will do anything to even a janitorDon't make me laugh junior, you shame the great eight hellish ghost alliance with your ramblings. Go into closed cultivation for two years, that should stop you from relying on mere mortals. Thank your senior brother for his mercy and stop making our great sect alliance lose face.
>raise a goblin or gnoll corpse>the zombie or skeleton is somehow a human zombie or skeletonDoes anyone else have this problem? Is the Weave on the fritz again?
>>93414404Lich, please. The "Weave" is a meme.What's happening is the corpse's diet consists of another sentient creature and the spell you used likely front-loads assembly based on greater spiritual mass. Goblinoids, gnolls, orcs, ogres, and a variety of "monsters" have lower spiritual mass and modern spells or formulae tend to prioritize spirit-matter rather than available corpus.If you're a wizard or use a spellbook, just adjust the initial priming to focus on bodies instead of whatever else it's targeting. Otherwise, you'll have to scrape any foreign spirit matter off the corpse if you want something other than its last (sentient) meal.
>>93414565Of course...I should have seen it myself. Much appreciated.
Lads, I'm still trying to finish up my Lich spell. I've been working on this motherfucker for nearly 60 years now, and I feel it is ready. But I don't know how good are these soul jars. They look good. I can't see any flaws (nor detect any faulty magic). But they were suspiciously cheap. Especially when compared to Sandro's Finest line that every single richfag lich is using. Does anyone have experience with the soul jars from NecroExpress? Pls respond, I'm tired of being a fleshlet.
I hate my boss at the temple of life and am thinking of getting into necromancy. Any advice? I have an hour before I'm finished with my lunch break and I kinda wanna get started as soon as possible.
>>93414605No problem. Also, be sure to unravel any spiritual matter accumulating on corpses known to be cannibals in life - those are disasters waiting to happen - and avoid any ectoplasm spells around those things until they're tabula rasa.>>93414608I'm going to ask the same thing I always ask: do you have your clone(s) prepared? If not, you're not ready for lichdom. You need a contingency, because you don't want to end up as a lich shade. Seriously, talk to one if you can stomach all the bitching.With that out of the way, NecroExpress is notorious for zero quality assurance with their stock and almost all of it (except the discount robes and headdresses) is third-party. If you've checked the jars yourself, they're probably okay for other souls, but I wouldn't leave it to chance for something this important. Soul jars work best when you've spent time around them and know for certain they're not laced with weird pranks or traps. Really, you can use almost anything as a soul jar that you've been in contact with - hell, my first soul jar was an apple sappling outside the keep.Also, Sandro's Finest is basically a pottery shop. It's nice pottery, but that's about it.>>93414630Start with ghost detection, haunt collection, and corpse preservation. If you can do that and avoid weird looks from your coworkers, you'll be able to practice discreetly and really embarrass your boss in a few years. Necromancy is a long, winding road fraught with peril.
>>93407710children learn quickly and the kid's already fated to become a lich anyway, I'd schedule regular appointments so you can check up on how he's doing and teach him, he'll catch onto the basics faster than the queen (and probably overtake you but that doesn't matter)never teach anything to anyone who could have their own agenda, teaching the prince is your only real option
>>93414608Just put a few souls through it before you need it to make sure it cycles reliably.
>>93414608I've always handcrafted my soul jars, I found that putting my heart and soul into them makes them work much better than most others' mass produced jarsmy latest one has been an incredibly expensive necklace with a fuckton of useful enchantments on it to encourage anyone who finds it to either sell it or keep it for themselves instead of destroying it
>>93415093Of course, I have my clones ready; this isn't my first rodeo. But it is such an annoyance to deal with the transfer. I would prefer not to. Oh well, I will probably go with >>93415342. Then again, it is also such an annoyance to capture some normalfag peasants. I really should work on my ghouls; they always end up chomping on them. It's kinda tiresome to get all the corpses half-eaten. What are you using now, anyway?>Also, Sandro's Finest is basically a pottery shop. It's nice pottery, but that's about it.Yeah, I know, but it is such a nicely-crafted pottery. The ornamental work is just fantastic, and I feel it would look just as well in another ~300 years. Dark purple and silver is just timeless, imo. Call me a traditionalist, but I still think that soul jars are simply a classy solution.>>93415512That sounds quite nice. But I'm not particularly handy with non-magical tools. Though I could probably get some artisan.
>>93416206>I really should work on my ghouls; they always end up chomping on them. It's kinda tiresome to get all the corpses half-eaten. Speaking of ghouls, I recommend against creating famine spirits. They're entertaining to watch, but a nightmare to maintain.>What are you using now, anyway?Multiple vectors after a breakthrough in some completely unrelated research. Without giving away too much, I'll just say that a custom albeit very small demiplane is the most conventional one I'm using. I credit Trinthakys' - not to be confused with Yrinthakis - treatise on nonlinear existential awareness for giving me the proper angle to pursue. The work is basically a journal written to lure adventurous types into one of Trinthakys' many astral gauntlets. If you can get beyond the gloating pompous style, he does slip in some very real applications for uncommon theories you'll never see in conventional manuscripts. I've found that the reason multi-storage so commonly causes mind erosion and spirit decay is due to the lich perceiving each container as identical.
Killed a lich for the first time a little while ago
>>93417399You made sure to get his phylactery, right?
>>93417607Yep
>>93410746>yeah they take centuries but they require (almost) no maintenance after you set them up to waitThey require security to keep so-called adventurers from looting the apparent dungeon. Perhaps I should prove my point by telling some where to find your mausoleum... You sure you don't have any valuable magical reagents required to keep your mummification spell going? Or some offerings worthy of bringing that mummy's spirit back from the dead that would, instead, fetch quite a price at the market?No, colleague; your production of raising effective dead is by no means worth the investment; it's a passion project that has slipped its harness.
Why the fuck are the new generation of Liches arguing about which creature type is best rather than making a variety and template-stacking the shit out of them?What has the necromancer community come to.
>>93418475Because they don't even know what a template is.
>>93418509The more I learn about the future, the more I use teleport through time to go back.
>>93417655What about his second phylactery?
Hey guys, i'm not sure where else to ask, but i hope you could help me. My job is to upkeep a cemetary, some older mausoleums (no known relatives to tend them so the family crypt upkeep falls to the city, and so to me, alone!) and collect deceased people on this relatively large city, you could call me a gravedigger if you will. Problem is that this job does not really make girls interested of me. But i'd like to get some, heh, "big tiddy goth gf" if you know what i mean. Yeah you'd think goth gf's would swarm on me with this job but no. Could you give me some help how to make this job look cooler? Or do you know any girls who would be interested? Any help is appreciated! Thanks!
>>93395713Absolute apprentice-level take. Skeletons are a good no-muss no-fuss option, and there are certainly higher quality minions you can make as others have said, but when you're raising chaff minions the zombie really is ideal. The remaining flesh and tissue means it's still got that muscle to swing a weapon harder or bite down harder. More importantly, rotten flesh promotes disease; Mortal armies might be able to handle the zombie hordes you raised in bulk, but disease will kill even the mightiest champions so long as they're not paladins. It's commonly believed by the uneducated that zombie bites can turn the living into zombies too; I find it works well as a form of psychological warfare. Perfectly capable soldiers on your enemy's side, killed by their own allies out of ignorance.Personally, I like to get a little devious and mix a few ghouls in with the zombie hordes. Most who don't stidy our art can't tell ghouls and zombies apart, and since ghoul bites ACTUALLY infect the living...well, it helps promote the useful misconception around zombies.
I don't care if this post gets me cancelled on a Necro-Weave, it's got to be said.I'm so fucking sick and tired of these Orcus damned vampires.Could you imagine a more insulting breed than vampires? We liches spend years and years researching, preparing, and executing our rituals to attain immortality, and these glorified leeches get it the easy way by getting bit and raised by another vampire. Worse yet, they all think they're soooooo fucking special because they treat vampirism like it's some secret little club you have to be invited to. They're all a bunch of pompous, arrogant pricks who boast about their useless "eternal beauty" and their disgustingly preserved genitalia. Meanwhile they're all glorified blood-junkies prancing about, eating and fucking like animals, hiding from the sun because these arrogant pricks are completely undone by something as mundane as sunlight.Worse is that so many of them love to title themselves "lord of the dead" or "queen of the night" and other such arrogant drivel. Have you ever even seen a vampire use necromancy? I haven't. These braindead meatsacks will show you some basic bitch hemomancy and expect you to call them necromancers.Can we all just purge them already? I'm so tired of dealing with their bullshit.
>>93418311the most valuable thing I've got is the honey the corpse is sitting inshit's in my wine cellar sharing space with some ancient wines
>>93420276I went down to check and the bottles fucking exploded because of course they didincredible
>>93405190>Oh hey intangible horror from begins the veil, can you go fetch my reagents?>Oh you can't because you're incorporeal?>Ahit I guess I have to go fetch all my shit myselfYou on a daily basis.
>>93395713I personally don't like using skeletons, except for sentry work at the various outposts within my domain. Sure they're less clumsy than a walking corpse but far too fragile for any distance of marches. Last time I tried moving a skeleton horde a good third of them wore down their feet just from the travel alone and the pace in which I had to wait for them to catch up to me was at a literal crawl. If the corpse is too deteriorated then I'd much rather go through the pain of binding the spirit and turn it into a shadow than bother with the fucking bones.
>>93419512Listen. Buddy. This is what new necromancers LIVE for, ok. We're here for you.What you do is that you find some new guy in your area who has just cracked his first couple of times of forbidden wisdom right, and you tell that guy that you're in need of goth cred. He's probably got some barely moving corpses and a couple of skeletons that can move their hands, or a casper or two, right? You help him spread the word about how there's a new dark lord in town, he let's you do the van helsing routine on a couple of his rejects as he "Sadly manages to escape (With all his actual important stuff)". Bonus points if you help him arrange for a little kidnapping of the goth chick, he can collect some reagents and have a witness to his new spookiness (and hey maybe he's new enough at this that he still has appendages) and you get to look extra hot to the goth chick.
>>93419512Disregard bitchesAcquire lichdom
>>93419512Comrade, the answer to your needs is next to you. Just get the lichloved feat, and the graveyard is your brothel.
>>93419762>They're all a bunch of pompous, arrogant pricks who boast about their useless "eternal beauty" and their disgustingly preserved genitalia. Meanwhile they're all glorified blood-junkies prancing about, eating and fucking like animals, hiding from the sun because these arrogant pricks are completely undone by something as mundane as sunlight.You can always bully vampires by reminding them that, had they bothered to continue their arcane training, any skilled mage can substitute an anchored outsider as fodder for the standard longevity ritual to make it instantaneous and permanent. No flesh-igniting sunlight, no wacky holy symbol phobias, no dying in the showers because you forgot, and no risk of dying again to hachets or splinters. Long before I considered lichdom, I tossed a particularly duplicitous erinyes into a longevity ritual I had left active and never needed another one. While I do have to eat semi-regularly, that's not something I planned to give up as a lich anyway and I can even taste the food (something vampires always complain about).>Can we all just purge them already? I'm so tired of dealing with their bullshit.I've never tolerated any number of them in my domains and certainly never created any. They disrupt the nightlife and confuse the wildlife. Show them a sunrise and be done with it.
you are using demiplanes to protect all your important stuff, right?
>>93420454you've got t keep in mind the local adventuring environment though, else you'll have Chad Thunderfighter barging in and ruining everything, some fresh nec right out of academy banishment ain't gonna be able to handle that
>5th era lichs need to feed their phylactery constantly pathetic, if I can't spend 5000 years in my timeless demiplane researching what is even the point?
>>93419762>Can we all just purge them already?but they have so much money and pay comically high for basic-ass stillwater or shade enchantments because they can't into enchanting
>>93419762>Orcus damned vampires>hiding from the sun>completely undone by something as mundane as sunlightDo your reps, I'm surprised you managed to not poison yourself and die a true death during your ritual
>>93424199>another 3rd or 4th era new lich trying to pass himself off as a 1st or 2nd era old lichI bet you don't even know how to perform a power ritual, damned centurial
>>93419512Sir, you have come to the right person for advice. Every fine goth lady knows that "Necromancer" means "Neck romancer". All that is required is working out how to get from here to there.First, what you need to do is to find some appropriate skeletons to raise to do your manual labor for you, while you direct them from comfort in gentlemanly attire; which you can now afford, since you aren't replacing boots and trousers and other leggings so very often. Be sure that there is no one to object to being put to such purposes; do not commit such a faux pas at this stage! When their daily duties are done, rent them out to the state for labor. As you serve your community with various deeds of cost-effective labor, your profits will grow, and you can better attire your workforce so they are publicly presentable as a professional workforce. Be sure to also find one suitable for manservant duties, so that you may enjoy freshly brewed tea in the afternoons, as you inspect the progress of your workforce. Finally, be sure to train a skeleton to deliver letters for you; be sure to instruct it in all the requisite niceties, such as tipping its cap. When it can do so as the equivalent of a model citizen, have it drop off a letter to your preferred admirers, and have it stop by the next day to receive a reply. Surely, you will receive good news.
>>93420311My apologies, friend... that... that was the adventurers. It seems a tricky one was scrying on me as I last posted. When they noticed there was potentially easier prey, they stopped trying to infiltrate the grounds of my mansion and raided yours instead... you may yet find that some of the more valuable bottles are instead missing, rather than smashed. You may yet have a chance to track it down and get your revenge.All of that being said, the experiment you describe was no doubt an inevitable failure, unless the spirit you were trying to revive as a mummy was an alcoholic. You need to give them sufficient reward to make them emotionally invested in returning from the dead, after all.
>>93420431My friend, you are indeed raising an inferior quality skeleton. If you had merely used skeletons with petrified bones, you would not have that problem. Petrified skeletons are much more durable.
>>93427909No, no. The bottles aren't just smashed, they've exploded because I left them too long without checking them, I've had it happen before.In fact I think they've been like that for a while since there are a large number of candied insects near the coffin.
>>93427821This has one drawback. Usually the skeleton servant is better at boning than you...
>>93430492While I recognize your intended jocularity, I assure you, in this case, barring some very unusual fetishes, the literal is no practical substitute for the metaphorical.
>>93404990Did you use enough natron?I always use about 20% than the ritual calls for, just to be on the safe side.Smells a bit, though.
>>9343230020% moreSorry, I just reformed.
