Post the weirdest toys out there, bonus if they're not bootlegsStarting with the guest of honorhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=84HjYazRADE
I know OP already posted a toy related to shitting already but this toyline is just content farms as a physical form
>>11031145Why IS poopoo such a common thing with toys these days?Also thread tax:These toys are basically off the same vine, slutty toddlers. Why is that so damn common too?
>>11031145>>11031534children are naturally drawn to bums and the things that come out of themat a certain point in a child's development it's natural for them to begin being fascinated by their orifices, this type specifically is called "anal fixation" and it's very normal, however a kid eventually learns to grow out of it by not having it encouragedthese shit poo toys are the result to people who understand kids *psychologically*, who studied them out of books and courses, but never actually interacted with kids, attempting to make something for kids. it's like if aliens made a TV show for humans, it'd just be 8 hours of sleeping, eating, shitting, scratching your ass and having sex. these toys are actually, legitimately, made by weird fucking robots, execs who have sold their soul and humanity away in favor of number counting and profits, and are now profiting off of a child's base instincts which are not beneficial to their development. >>11031534as for toys like these, they encourage consumerismthe appeal of these toys is the packaging, it's getting to buy, consume, and open something, after which you're no longer interested in the toy itselfthey want to encourage little kids to shop, and getting to them at a young age and showing them little toddlers, just like them, dressed in all the slutwear that the fashion industry offers them, will get them ready to go early on
>>11031534>these daysChildren have always been amused by crap
>>11031646Anon it is insanely common right now, just cause it was always there doesn't mean it's not suddenly everywhere nowAnd what's weirder is the way it's presentedPoop used to be gross, the only kids who liked playing with toys relating to it were gross kids. At MOST you might've found the feature in a realistic baby toy for girls who wanted to be mommies, but even then it wasn't seen as cute or glamorous, just a natural thing human beings do that adds to the realism. Other than that, it was a toy for crude kids who found barf and bugs and farts and slime and stuff like that entertaining.Now it's sparkly and cutesy and it's no longer advertised with "hey kids, buy this and don't let mom know! yuuuuck!" but rather as something parents oughta buy for their kids.I guess the days of kids being able to buy toys with their own money are over, so the poop market needs to be advertised to the parents instead.
>>11031656I'd say the only reason you see it more and it's more common is there's just more toys being made in general, more crap and literal crap to fill the shelves, it's a tried and true old trend, both slime and shit. I remember squishy toys that had shit pop out the ass of a farm animal back when I was little. I think them making it more cutesy and pretty is just them pushing to appeal to the girls market.
>>11031656i have never given this much thought but i would also attribute it to the rise of smartphones, social media and in particular, the poop emojiKids earlier weren't going round drawing poop but now they can more easily type poop and look at an amusing poop emojii no longer want to think about this further so i am stopping my post there
>>11030803Could be fatter.
>>11031815
>>11030803would
>>11031534Poop, farts, and butts have always been something that deeply amuses children. For boys, it continues into adulthood and men think shit jokes are the most hilarious thing (even putting them on dating profiles, to the disgust of most women). Couldn't tell you why for either group.Edgy toddler dolls have been a thing for a long time, Bratz Babiez happened 2 decades ago and maybe there was something similar even before that. Edgy dolls are alternatives to the safe plainness of Barbie, Disney Princess etc that appeals to a lot of kids simply because it's something different.
Mego in its dying days scraped the (toilet ) bowl for ideas. In 1976, they made a cool Muhammad Ali action figure. In 1981, behold the Clown-Arounds. This was Mego's answer to Smurfs. Yes, it bombed massively.
Here, have a bonus Reagan.
Big Jim was a 9 inch Mattel action figure, produced from 1973 to the 80s (in South America and Europe). This was an 80s Euro release with swappable square faces.
Why did they make a toy of Manimal? You tell me.
Charlie Chan plus movie monsters.
Behold Hasbro's 1966 challenger to Barbie, Peteena the Pampered Poodle. With a removable tail.
No, there were no furries in 1966. This was unironically aimed at little girls.
>>11032519idk how people itt aren't getting that the weirdness of it isn't the fact that it's there, it's how it's advertisedalso LOL surprise dolls aren't about fart and poopoothey're about toddlers in BDSM gear and prostitute clothes
Why is it always Americans making this stuff?
Here is Peteena's man.
Here to haunt your dreams is Suzy Sad Eyes, based off the 60s Keene big-eye paintings.
Little Miss No Name from 1965 Hasbro came dressed in rags, with a tear attached to her face and an upturmed palm to beg for change. The implication being that she would probably die in an alleyway unless the little girl in the toy store bought her. And she has the face of a troll doll.
A mail away promo of the time.
Speaking of animal/human hybrid abominations, here are Mattel's Gorgeous Creatures from 1980-81. They were "inspired" by Miss Piggy.
These were 7 inches tall, with lingerie and rather curvy figures under those floofy dresses.
I've never heard of this line, but the faces are weirding me out.
Did you ask for a dinosaur with brushable hair? No? Too bad. (Did the Cave Club designers see this? )
This is dangerously close to pastel equines.
Pinkie and Pepper forever and ever...
Oh joy, it's an MGA toy that poops.
>>11032632uh
>>11032716Barbie did it first, multiple times with new dog designs too
>>11032716Can the girl poop too?
Moose Toys is run by hardcore pedos. They used to put goatsees on their store display modulars until I caught them and called them out on this board when that satanic unicorn in ops post first came out
>The earliest known toy with a pooping gimmick is the "Little Squirt," which dates back to the early 20th century. This toy, produced in the 1930s by the American toy company T. Cohn, is a small rubber boy figure that, when squeezed, would squirt water from its rear end, mimicking the act of pooping. The gimmick was meant to be humorous and entertaining for children, marking one of the first instances of such a feature in a toy.>T. CohnIts always them. Always. The jews have always been the ones who push all the sick fetishes
>>11032994Sure you did.
>>11033020Nigga go ask your mom about me ya little turd
Hasbro made a line of small dolls with glow in the dark pastel hair called Moondreamers. They guarded kids' dreams. Fair enough. This is their nemesis, Evil Scowlene. She can't sleep ever, and wants to do the same to everyone else. With that face, it should be easy to keep kids awake.
>>11032701Those sculpted rolls are summoning something visceral within me
>>11032701>>11032700God I wish I’d had those as a kid, they’re exactly what I would have wanted.
>>11032641I addressed edgy dolls in the post you're applying to, separate from the poop stuff. Although IIRC, some LOLs have a peeing mechanism too.
>>11032676christ those eyes
I am a dumb yank. UK natives will have cringed instantly at this.
Awaken your innate nerd powers without the need of truck kun and isekai. Just play this game.
Good Lord, anything to get a feel in the 60s, I guess...
Kids actually love dump trucks so this is actually genius, but it still looks weird.
Was the mere concept of Chinese food that new in the 60s?
Another excuse of a game to cop a feel, this time in the 70s.
People unironically hunted for uranium in the 50s because Uncle Sam would pay dearly for potential nukes. This game let you have all the fun of that without the bonus agonizing death by radiation. Fun.
Not super bizarre, but it still inspires rage.
Ask your grandpa about this, or hit up YouTube (I saw it there too).
Supply your own innuendo here.
Uh, what?
>>11031145I STILL wanted this stupid thing. The coof ruined its distribution, and just when its wave started popping up in thrift stores, it just wouldnt show. It's not fair goddammit
>>11033825Interesting that they would put a girl on the box for something that would primarily appeal to ultra autistic boys
>I MEAN REEEALLY!?>WHAT WERE THEY THINKING!?>BOOOING WURRRWURRRRWURRRRR
>>11032700Darling Dinos were great.
>>11033872This shit is pretty universal for kids, used to work at a nursery and they were all obsessed equally with sandbox play with diggers and building, water play with boats and also pretending to be Elsa from Frozen so they could freeze eachother (we had to retire the play costume because it caused fighting), I don’t think kids get really gendered in their choices until they’re about 6-7.
>>11032701There actually was a dino in the earlier gens.
Not really too weird but the American Idol Barbies were stuck in a ridiculous permanent pose
>>11034135
>>11034136McFarlane makes dolls now?
>>11031145>Not Buzz Shiteyear
>>11033881I miss him
>>11032634>She's a swinger!Well, folks, I ain't a furry, but this lady insists...
>>11033834https://yandex.ru/video/preview/4196822429656556133>>11032695The Eyevil doll gave me some funny dreams as a young lad.
>>11033945I know. My room is full of 80s Pastel Equines because they were my favorite childhood toy. I was just trying to hide my power level. (But they DO need to reissue the little dinosaur and other baby animal friends).
Hey kids, prepare for your minimum wage future now!
>>11032634It always feels so surreal whenever I see this thing and realize that yes, it was indeed a real thing that existed.>>11034316Yeah, I'm not sure if the phrase had the same connotation in '66 that it does today, but it is a funny implication all the same.
Make your own web, kids. No, not like that!
A Hulk workbench. Doesn't he look thrilled?
Who ordered 12 inches of Superman?
Here's 6 feet of super for you size queens.
Vintage Mr. Potato Head was a nightmare.
The UK add on was even worse.
Why?
Thor on a pink scooter, because.
Beetle Bailey finally quits loafing around and starts popping fools.
This is Incredible Edibles, a 1969 Mattel kids toy for making gummy and sweet type things. It was also made of hot, hot metal with the wooden flower knob on top being the only safe handle. No one gave an f in the 60s.
Open box shot to show off the weirdness.
Come spark one up with Batman (in the UK).
>>11033843>>11034468>>11034470>>11034476The worst part of the original Mr. Potatohead stuff is that they didn't actually include plastic fruit/vegetable bodies the way the modern ones do - just the eyes, ears, nose, mouths, headless bodies (that were nix'd entirely for the modern updates) and other accessories. Every time you wanted to 'play' with them, you had to dig a real fruit or vegetable out of the pantry to plug the stuff into, and you'd inevitably have to throw the thing away when you were done before it could rot.>>11034483>>11034484Precursor to Dr. Dreadful's Food Labs?
Want to blow Spider-Man's pipe?
A set commemorating the royal no one talks about anymore.
Jazz Hands...I mean Dance Mark.
The art is what makes this one strange.
>>11031145>>11034141I can't do the chest.
>>11034464Kinda reminds me of the old Mego Hulk van. Because we all knoe that hulk loves to take long excursions on the back roads of America to experience a simple transient lifestyle.
Miss Barbie from 1964 had open and shut eyes, and bombed massively. Kids wanted nothing to do with that face.
>>11034911I really loved that style of eyes. My friends had baby dolls at school and I just loved moving them around and watching eyes close and shut. Just really interesting.
>>11034488>candy cigarettesThese made you feel like such a badass lol
>>11034913>>11034911Winking Western Barbie had a similar mechanic with one winking eye, though a bit more positively received, she doesn't age well and the eyelid essentially melts over time
Locket Surprise Barbie from 1994 had a hollow heart shaped compartment inside her chest. You could store kid makeup or a photo of Ken in there.
Poor Ken, the eternal accessory, served his purpose by providing more compartments for his queen.
1995 Got Milk Barbie. What is this, /d?
1992 Sparkle Eyes Barbie had plastic rhinestones inset into her eyes. This gimmick actually worked on the Disney Princess dolls because it suited their artstyle. Barbie? Not so much, in my opinion...
Oreo School Fun Barbie from 2001. 'Nuff said.
1998 Birthday Party Barbie had a hole in her mouth connected to her back panel. When you pushed on the panel, she would actually blow air to inflate her toy mylar balloon or unfurl her Birthday tweeter. And she looks just like a blow up doll...
>>11032664ew
>>11032701you can say pony bro, the moderation isnt what it used to be, case in point
>>11035957I'm not a bro, just want to be careful lol. And I would give my soul for that Nirvana. Now back to hunting for weird dolls to post.
Kissing Barbie, she has a unique sculpt and a mechanic that makes her head move forward and lips pucker to give a kiss, she also came with lipstick to leave little kiss marks with. I actually have this one.
Yes, there was a Barbie flavor of gelatin. Why? You tell me.
2002 brought the love child of Barbie and Gumby, the Bend and Flex Barbie.
It's ogre.
Here's a picture of the American Idol Barbie mentioned upthread in box.
Barbie -loves- Woody
2010's privacy nightmare, capable of storing and saving video footage of little girls.
2013's human lite-brite.
>>11035963neither am i, i am just to used to using male terms here caz of the whole togtfo unofficial rule
>>11034457>Yeah, I'm not sure if the phrase had the same connotation in '66 that it does todayit didn't, it referred to swing music which was modern at the time and 'swinger' was someone who goes out and dances
>>11035933>>11035934this is lineally only "offensive" if you're the type of person who looks into everything to find some possible obscure interpretation that could make it offensive, hardly anyone even uses that term but if youre an exec ffor toy production or really any other kinda consumerr goods, you kinda do need to hire a guy who IS the type to notice that shit just to point it in you face, cause there will always be some randos who latch onto something like this
>>11032676Man wtf, i know it's a doll but it's so depressing
>>11032693Would
>>11037643lol that was my capcha id posted in doll, i had to overplay the trigger caz /doll/ is very far left leaning
>>11037934i have no idea what youre saying please rephrase that in words i know
>>11037934/doll/ hates trannies, coomers, and pedos and calls them all out. How's that "very far left leaning." If anything, it's one of the more conservative threads
>>11033835THAT'S NO GOOD
>>11034533GRAND FLASH
>>11038050Coomers and pedos don’t have a political ideology as they infest every level and strata of society masquerading as upstanding individuals who can be trusted with kids or operating heavy machinery.
>>11034141thanks for getting me omegakekked
>>11031656>Now it's sparkly and cutesy and it's no longer advertised with "hey kids, buy this and don't let mom know! yuuuuck!" but rather as something parents oughta buy for their kids.>I guess the days of kids being able to buy toys with their own money are over, so the poop market needs to be advertised to the parents instead.This is where I disagree.It's marketing that tries to eat its cake and shit it too.It's a grossout toy like 90s rad dude eeeeuuuyuuwh yuck stuff. But not TOO gross. And it's all cute and girly for the girly generation who thinks it's precious. Or it's just like, totally IRONIC you know. LOL.I view it the same as the recent surge in "mascot horror" games that are both horror (don't tell your parents! this is adult stuff!)Clearly made to attract kids with semi cutesy colourful designs. And to have this transgressive, hey! look at this game for kids, isn't it CURSED (tm)It's all premeditated. And not just depraved sonic furry porn. (while also, undeniably a cause for it in part. And marketing towards those autists inclined to google "sonic amy urethra sounding giantess diaper fetish".Because those whales spend hella cash on retarded shit.
>>11038321Are you high rn anon?>girly generationLittle boys today are more violent and sociopathic than ever. Look how many stories come out all the time about them maiming or even killing their teachers. Ain't nothing girly about today's boys
>>11034135>Scoliosis Barbie
>>11038050>conservatives hating pedosUmmm...
>>11034770Sometimes it just nice to get away. Hulk like eating at greasy spoon and seeing state parks.
>>11038845that's exactly the issuesociety attempts to make them girly, that's what makes them go insane, boys are supposed to let out energy in play and roughhousing which are now shunned, not gentle collage making and bead bracelet sewing and therapy speakanon is right, modern culture is highly feminizedthe issue is that it doesn't workboys and men are "difficult" for modern society, they're less malleable and easily socialized, more rebellious, more rough, and that's a good thingbut a culture that absolutely hates that has been trying to turn them into the "good kinda boys", aka girls
>>11038321Everything you said is accurateThat aside,...>tries to eat its cake and shit it too.That's fucking great, anon, I kek'd
>>11038977source: literally a picture i maid in mspaint using comic sans??ihuh?i'm not even a republican or a democratright now i'm best described as confused as to what made you think this is an argument
>>11039220>men and boys are retarded basic animals who can't control their impulses so they chimp outSounds about right
>>11039258go eat more antidepressants, stinky
>>11038899She’s just like me :(
>>11034533Hanna Barbera were a bunch of whores
>>11032676I know ads exploit kids' emotions but guilt tripping four year olds with death 'take her home or she'll die' crosses a line into outright vulgarity. That pissed me off.
>>11040042That’s brilliant, would buy.
>>11040217It's still going on to this day, albeit with dog & cat plushes that are all about "adopting" the plush animal from a shelter. Pound Puppies is probably the most famous and longest-running toy that milks this guilt tripping theme. But there has to be some negative psychological repercussions to a child that "saves" these stuffed animals only for mom to sell it at a garage sale or donate it to a thift store a year or two later.
>>11036035mmm, squishy bones........
