im a pretty big Warhammer fan, been listening to youtube lore videos over a year, id like you to cast my favorite primarch Konrad Curzei think making a slowburner survival horror about his life would've been dope
This warhammer shit is the closest thing to AI slop that was ever written before genuine AI slop existed. Reading anything about it is like getting sprayed with cheetos crumbs and fat kid spit for a half an hour. There were dildos writing jerkoff airport bookstore novels in the 90s that could have put together a more compelling universe that made more sense. It's like being trapped in a classroom that smells like bleach and watching the fattest tard in school tell lies to smaller, more retarded members of his tribe while they dig in their assholes and moan. It's garbage.
jenna ortega
>>214267908He is a primarch. How do you make a slow burn survival horror about that? The whole point of his backstory was he himself was so horrible that the entire planet fell in line and was afraid of him. When you're a demigod you ARE the threat.
>>214267908horrible ai sloppa OP. that picture is fucking dismal.
>>214267908>from the viewpoint of the rapists and jaywalkers he brutally murders he's described as 'perfect' under all the dried blood and grime>Canonically over ten feet tall. There is no casting him, boss. Only a choice of which actors you use as the base for his CGI appearance and mixed vocals.
>>214268455maybe a mini tv show where he hunts stranded space marines like batman, that would've been cool
>>214268493also this, lemme remedy that.picrel a close up from the only good and lore accurate Curze art I've seen.
>>214268455Act one of this slow burn survival horror movie: A demigod who started as a parody concept in the 1980s creates either 20, 21, or 22 little demigod children, but they are stolen by demons from another realm because the demigod daddy stole magical power from them?? Or something? Actually, his demigod wife (there is a race of people who just come back after they die, about half of them are boring normies and one of them is one of the demigod children) stole them because she thought the demigod daddy would use them for evil.Anyway, then it turns out that our civilization dies when we raise a whole generation of autistic, ignorant, and obese children who think that a fake fan wiki created to show them pop-up ads is worth devoting your intellectual life to.If you want a script for a JOSEPH CONRAD CURSE THE SPACE PSYCHO BATMAN movie just have chatGPT write it and then shoot a bullet through your tablet into your brain
>>214268568yooo he looks like a goth rock vocalist, looks like that type o negative dude
>>214268618People do that with religions and fables all the time. Yeah the stories are fake. We know. They're works of fiction.
>>214268397Heh
>>214268627Peter Steele? Holy crap he kinda does.
>>214268678Except the Bible.
>>214268737>40k is so dumb lol>here's why my magic man, talking animals, and dead jew nailed to a cross are the super real deal4/10 bait.
>>214267908If you skin a skinner, the amount of skinners remains the same. Autistic Space Torture Batman is wrong.
horus heresy era shit would only work as a animation. 3D animated like from the astartes guy or even a cartoon. casting space marines is impossible, there are not enough roidfreak actors, because astartes look like megaroided mutants. basically adapt the 70 or so horus heresy novels and remove bloat (and john grammaticus aka john warhammer) probably also order it so its just one fluid timeline instead of jumping back and forth to tell character backstories. but this will never happen, at least not in a version that is good. to appeal to the masses, especially when it comes to the primarchs, they will make it marvelesque. it will become even more of a WWE family feud then it already is. also you have amazon/hollywood/netflix/whoever would produce it heavily neuter the grimdark aspect of it. and on the other end you have GW who are just plain retarded and stingy, as they showed with their pathetic attempt at a own streaming service and the garbage they churned out there. they hired some actual talent, but very obviously gave them fuck all to work with. whatever comes, its going to be absolute ass.
>>214268737embarrassing
>>214268618Peak /lit/ pseud post.
>>214268775what if you skin more than one skinner?Can you imagine if the night lords came down and kidnapped all the world's leaders and started broadcasting their brutal torturous deaths? "Hmmm, it doesn't seem to be having the usual effect, Sev... why the cheering?"
>>214267908>im a pretty big Warhammer fan, been listening to youtube lore videos over a yearHave you ever been to a GW? I’m not judging, by the way. It’s just that the current 40K fans seem to have completely different interests than the ones from when I went to the stores ~20 years ago. Back then it was all about the miniatures, now most fans seem to barely know they exist.
He isn't even the best chaos character.>only primarch to die by mortal hands>gets killed like a bitch>"i-i-i k-knew you were c-coming baka i w-wanna prove a p-p-point to d-daddy anyway">legion immediately fragments and falls apart because they're all scumbags and types he hates anyway>dont even have a reason to revolt, just being edgy and daddy issuesCurze sucks.
>>214268879I'm in that boat. Love the idea of the tabletop but it's so expensive and the grim beauty of the lore has simply outgrown it's original medium.
>>214268879>Back then it was all about the miniatures, now most fans seem to barely know they exist.Good. Total GW death
>>214268901>He isn't even the best chaos character.>chaos>posts a pic of Abbyanon, I....
>>214268928He literally leads the black legion and has the mark of all the chaos gods. He lords over chaos undivided and blew Cadia apart and summoned the great rift. He went to each of the primarchs and even Vashtorr and got unique traits like summoning daemons from Lorgar and he is essentially the replacement of Horus himself. He has even turned down daemonhood. He IS chaos.
>>214268967He needs an ending. 12 failed black crusades later and he hasn't been physically, mentally, spiritually, and financially flayed alive by his patrons?They should have killed him during the 4th or 5th and then had his successor more or less fail to keep chaos united and then had THAT successor killed by Huron. Abby's just kinda a running joke now, and 1, 2, or ten crispy Cadias isn't going to change that.
>curze
Just adapt the Night Lords omnibus stories for comfy horror gore hijinks from the POV of the skinners.
>>214268901he's the most thoughtful, well developed and poetic that's why he is the bestpeople with taste don't care about meatheads who are le strongest.
>>214268074kek pure poetry in review form. eggburt and roger would be proud.
mark my words. by 2028 we’ll have a trans sisters of battle chapter and the hobby will flourish in america once more.
>>214269412>he's the most thoughtful, well developed and poetic>curzeLol. Lmao even. Not even in the actual lore is this true. Only Ferrus has less impact on the overall story and heresy than Curze did.
>>214268737oh god, now i feel sorry for you
>>214269537Gene seed is already a thing. Space marines are basically trans.
>>214269588it's not about the impact, it's about the development and personalityKonrad is a byronic type character of Warhammer verse.
>>214269412that would be true for perty & he is also one of the overall strongest. >beats fulgrim multiple times>beats demon angron>87%s the fists>secretary of the heresy, without him it would have been little more then a sad wet fart in the history of the imperiumand he achieves all of that while being a petulant manchild that has a melty everytime he has to do social interactions.
>>214268901>best chaos character >post abaddonoof
>>214268879Because men got forced out of literature so Warhammer novels are the only shit guys read now. Unironically that's one of the major reasons why Warhammer has become so popular. They're the modern equivilent of pulp novels that you used to get in newsagents, except now because seething feminist women have hijacked publishers, there is nothing else being made for guys to read.
>>214268794No, the horus heresy should always remind as myth, background fluffs that mentioned by other characters The moment any primarch or high lv deamon revealed should be an holy shit, climatic scene for hypeWhen the story actually focus on these guys it is all lame family drama
>>214268901abaddon is a unlikeable retard with 0 redeeming qualities. first and foremost he ins not interesting in the slightest and he is consistently tricked into the dumbest shit and then just survives. his only feat is still being around.
>>214269722pertuabo is a good character but being a manchild who ruins everything because of his tantrums is not as cool as konrad being a fatalyst who goes his own way
>>214268879i used to have a small nid army as a kid. played with my friends for 1-2 years. shit was too expensive and painting them was bothersome. got back into warhammer when reconnecting with one of those friends years later, now i just read some of the books and check out lore when i´m bored. fuck playing a fortune for plastic and paint to have some toy soldier standing around to protect my virginity.
>>214269799This is actually true yeah There isnt any fiction series in today market that satisfies that gritty fantasy, warring urge for men like 40k
>>214269722>beats fulgrim>fulgrim literally cripples him and siphons his soul to ascend to daemonhood as perty has to shack himself into a life saving devicePerturabo was a bitch.
>>214269867i just remember liking all night lord related novels, except when curze was in the scene. he is just a fucking clown. jago or talos & the gang where much more compelling. yet i was always happy when perty entered the scene and had a melty. we also desperately need more of the 4th legion. i´d wish for some post heresy stuff, the long war or whatever its called, when the traitors fled into the eye of terror and started killing each other, with the iron warriors setting up neutral ground. it gets a brief mention in one of the night lords books but thats it.
>LORE-obssessed man, ANGRY-man, CURSED-man, RED-SKINNED DEMON MAN (who is also a sorcerer), PERTURBED-man, DEATH-man, and the only GAY primarch are as trustworthy as the rest of my sonsWas the Emperor a moron?
>>214267908Curze is fucking amazing. He tortured a woman to death because she wanted to commit suicide and he thought suicide was wrong. He got a higher compliance rate than the Ultramarines and he did it by using torture and murder. He was responsible for the first live fire legion on legion incident because he thought the Thousand Sons were being heretical. He beat the Lion by just straight up strangling him and he's fought Guiliman and the Lion two on one and escaped. He's killed Vulcan until he got bored. He even blew up his own planet and let himself be killed because he thought it was the right thing to do. No other Primarch is anywhere near that interesting.
>>214270629yes, he's literally batman if he was in space and without no kill rule
why aren't there any Indian or Pakistani Space Marine chapters? Indians are quintessentially Bri'ish now
The lore is all kinds of fucked up, one day ultrasmurfs die by the thousand another they save the galaxy using nothing but their quick thinking and personal charm. Same with cuntstodes, gay knights and so on. Hard to care about any of it.
>>214267908He was schizophrenic and was seething about crovax
>>214270199yes, the emperor is the biggest plot hole in the story. alone how he handled angron was such a big fuckup, it basically reads like "look my son, i really want you to rebel against me so i´m going to treat you as wrong as possible"
>>214271730Well the excuse is half the primarchs were going to fall to chaos no matter what so Big E deliberately antagonised all the tards to push them into rebellion
>>214271231>obligatory indians are already nurgle demons postYou’re right though it would be funny
>>214271809fulgrim had a good background and was pretty nice and stable guyWas being a perfectionist such a red flag?
>>214271809i would not call it "the tards"horus, perturabo and alpharius are much more capable then retards like russ, ferrus or vulkan. i´d say he looked at the overall circumstances they grew up in, how corrupted they already where and based his decision on that.
>>214272337he was a narcissist and a retard.
Primarchs were a mistake.
>>21426790840k used to be silly, now its retarded. They even look like plastic toy figures
>>214267908>Konrad CurzeGet the fuck outta here, that can't be a real character's name.
>>214272867b-but he had a good heart
>>214268074As a huge 40k Fan, this is sooo true. The real Crime here is that it's a British IP, the only way this equation could be worse was if it was a French IP.
>>214274794Are you saying no American people have written 40k books or had any input into it?
>>214275065Individual writers are no matter, the origin of the IP and its current ownership under GW matters.
>>214273790This isn't even as bad as it gets.
>>214270629>He beat the LionNo he didn't The lion wrangled him back to Bobby G and Sanguinius
>>214270629He absolutely did not win that first fight with the Lion. The Lion was winning when they got separated and would have bashed his skull open if it had continued.
>>21426876440k ripped all that off tho.
>>214267908They need to hire Gerard Way for the soundtrack.
