why were 95+% of millennials filtered by aliens that get hurt by water coming a water planetone can easily think of 100 reasons why humans, if they had spaceships, might go to a lava planet that rained lava
Name 100
>>214287234Shyamalamadingdong sucks.
>>214287234Because people were willing to suspend their disbelief on account of not being totally jaded yet.
>>214287234t. seething water-hating Shyamalan demon creatureGet fucked water hater
>>214287259Seethe louder, timmy.
>>214287246Not OP but if this thread can be kept alive another 3 hours I can probably write a list up for you
>>214287234a crummy water planet?they should have gone to pokemon creatures planet instead
>>214287234I doubt we'd stroll around naked if we went to such planets.
>>214287424I mean go for it but I'm sure as hell not going to read it. Going to a planet that literally rains lava sounds pretty retarded desu
>>214287234You don't get it, it was a story about overcoming grief, that was the real twist. It's not about aliens from another planet. The aliens being defeated by water on the water planet is a tale as old as time.
It was the way they presented the aliens that made this shit pure nightmare plutonium. You being autistic and focused on completely inconsequential details would never understand.
>>214287234If a premise is retarded and I recognize it as being retarded, that's not me being filtered, that's the premise being retarded.
>>214287485They were fucking CREEPY aliens. Hate shyamalan all you want but he had a talent for a little while there. Also it's Mel Gibson kino like come on.
Why are aliens always naked
>>214287514scrunts were also incredibly based
The movie makes more sense if they were demons mistaken for aliens and their weakness was holy water, but is it giving Shyamalan too much credit to say that was his intention?
>>214287484The fact it uses the aliens as an allegory for this makes it cringe because the surface level story doesn't work on its own terms.
>>214287234>oh fuck our colony ship is running out of juice>this planet has juice>alright lets go>shit this planet is covered in poison but we still need the juiceThere you go easy
>>214287547>why are aliens always n-ACK
>>214287234this is just a war of the worlds thing isn't iti assume that was the first one to do it
>>214287485ThisI distinctly remember that scene where you first see an alien in the news clip scaring the living shit out of me.
>>214287547They aren't naked they have a thin film covering their skin and eyes from radiation. This is actually how the Grey aliens do it IRL. Their eyes actually look more like ours just bigger
>>2142872341. Because it's cool2. Because the spaceship runs on lava3. Someone dared them to do it4. It was a joke5. Some fine ass bitches said they'd fuck the hell out of them if they went to a lava planet6. It's only lava on the outside and it's really nice on the inside, like Earth but inside out7. Human settlers coming from a planet that is made put of lava, rains lava, but also is infested with space jews and new lava planet has none of these8. Because they can / because it's there9. Lava planet visiting is the new Extreme Sport10. After a digital dark age, despite retaining knowledge of interstellar space flight, we forgot what lava is and needed to study it11. It's a candidate for terraforming and we already terraformed the easy ones12. Long boring spaceflight and it's the least dangerous planet nearby13. Spacefarong lava-god worshipping cultists14. It's the only way to prevent the destruction of Earth15. It's the only place their wives won't find them16. The ship is full of yes-men and nobody told the captain it's a bad idea17. Toin coss between that and extremely cold planet18. There's aliens there that have been spamming radio messages calling humans fags and we're there to kick their asses19. Someone higher in the command chain ordered them to20. Testing out new lava proof exosuits21. The lava contains an extremely rare element needed to build warp drives22. Crew make up of lava-autists who like lava just because23. To win a contest24. So that they could claim it for humans before some other aliens do it first25. To make some lava planet denialists shut the fuck up once and for all by bringing them to a lava planetI'm sure I can come up with 75 more, lemme drink on it for a minute
>>214287719Thanks, ChatGPT!
>>214287234theyre demons, dude, not aliens. welcome to the 2005 internet
>>214287719keep going faggot
>>214287790I sat there and came up with those one by one, you faggot. Plus, chatgpt wouldn't have all the shitty fat thumb phoneposting typos>>21428782126. Humans have evolved to thrive on lava planets due to global warming27. Lava planet is the one place in the galaxy where you can get away with diddling kids (Epstein's Planet)28. One spaceship has to go to the lava planet to prevent ten other spaceships from going to the lava planet (space trolley problem)29. They got hypnotized30. Other aliens keep going there and won't tell us why31. It has really nice scenery32. There's a lot of oil there for some reason33. It's on the ol' bucket list34. They got a research grant and have to at least act like they're spending some of it on research35. Had to pull over somewhere to pee36. "Lava" is actually just codeword for space cocaine37. Turning the planet into a giant steam engine38. Pilot put in the wrong coordinates but refuses to admit she made a mistake and so they go there anyway and this is why you don't hire female pilots39. All the cool kids are doing it40. To get views / followers41. Space dumptruck dumps all of our space trash there42. It's the last place anyone would look for a band of motley space pirates, so they're going there to hide43. Space cops looking for a band of motley space pirates who are probably hiding there44. The planet itself is sentient and we're making first contact45. Going there to blow it up because it's an eyesore / in the way / is going to crash into something important46. Big game space hunters there to hunt the local lava worms47. Captain promised his mother on her deathbed that he'd fulfill her dream of going to a lava planet48. Got confused and thought it was a love planet49. It's inhabited by alien genies who will grant all of your wishes but you have to hang out with them in person50. Nobody told them not tookay I'm halfway there
51: Humans fleeing malevolent AI that has turned all other less dangerous planets into computorium52: Human cyborg slaves looking for new planets to turn into computorium, and the reason why the AI sent cyborgs is because it needs more computorium to make better decisions53: The local food there is really good and you can't get it anywhere else54: Marlak The Devourer demanded it and we don't really question his motivations55: Its the only way the astronauts can nut due to overexposure to HyperPorn56: It's really not as bad as everyone says it is, at least it isn't Detroit57: There's a wormhole located on the planet and it's the only way to get to the other side of the universe58: The journey to the lava planet is an avant garde performance art piece59: Some previous space explorers left something really important there60: To drop a gigantic lavaproof sculpture of their tag crew name onto the surface61: High def video of the planet's thermal convection used to seed a really good random number generator but for legal purposes we have to send a guy there first62: Space madness drove them to do it63: There's a geocache there64: Told someone once that they've been to the lava planet and said person demanded proof and they don't wanna look stupid65: Sheer boredom, there was nothing else going on and someone suggested going to the lava planet66: Corporate team building exercise67: It's the size of a marble and doesn't really pose much of a threat68: Prison planet for Earth criminals (basically space Australia - hot, uninhabitable, full of things that will kill you)69: nice!70: There's a sports team there71: Someone hacked the sensors on the ship and tricked everyone into thinking it was a lush garden of eden72: The Prophecy foretold it73: It was the least retarded idea of places to go that anyone aboard the spaceship came up with, the other options being a black hole, and Constant Anal Rape Planet74: Pokemon: Go75: interstellar public bus stop
>>214287234>A DOOR?
Look at crop fields. They’re inland. They made all the crop circles for navigation. They went to inland areas. They wanted Americas high fructose corn syrup.
>>214287234i been spooked a few times like this by unexpected presence of a human from that certain continent. the same kind of blending into the dark and the same kind of weird movement
76: How fucking cool would it be to have a castle fortress on a lava planet, like Darth Vader?77: Everywhere else is already too crowded78: Suicide pact79: Space crusaders there to slay Space Satan80: Space Satanists there to worship Space Satan81: Gonna barbecue the last of Earth's whales in the atmosphere82: Contrarian pick-me space settlers83: Everywhere else was closed84: Moth-based navigational system85: Scavenger hunt has a clue there86: You're cut off, pay your tab and get the hell out87: Cuz I ain't no bitch88: heil hitler89: It's where the best wampum is90: Hot alien gf wants me to meet xir parents91: It just made a lot of sense at the time, i don't know, I was in a really messed up place, man92: Roid rage93: Got tired of racism on Earth and everyone's black on the lava planet, eventually94: There was a music festival there (space Coachella / Burning Man)95: It's the only place where I can be alone with my own feelings96: Ran out of species on other planets to be Spaceist against97: Travel Channel shoot98: Only place where replacement parts for this particular spaceship are manufactured99: Because fuck you, that's why100: Avoiding work
>Mfw it’s behind
>>214289353>They wanted Americas high fructose corn syrup.They can pry it out of my cold, fat hands
>>214289648That was the plan, but Little Miss Sunshine and the fluoride in the water halted that plan.
>>214287424“Time you enjoy waisting isn’t wasted time.”
>>214289618Yeah but you would still wear some kind of anti lava suit or at the very least a tungsten umbrella
>>214287234If advanced humans went to planet lava it would be in science expeditions to check for valuable resources or something. Not individual people skulking down the alleys in some obviously populated village acting spooky for no reason.
>>214287234>they can cross thousands of light years but don't have the technology of pirates from the 1700s. The technology to block moisture.
>>214289727The question was why, not how
as a kid, those invisible aliens were scary AF
kek
alliums are scary
>>214290048but theyre demons actually
>>214287246>>214287424Ok I just got home, give me a bit and i'll start writing my list
>>214287432kek
>>214290344I went to start and realized I didn't actually have a program that would let me count how many lines I had written, I just installed one so lets see how long 100 reasons takes me
>>214287424>>2142872461. I came here, to this planet2. Its a joke.3. It's complicated.4. The medication for my blood pressure needed lava.5.I've been telling you, the weight loss, the medication, It fucks with your head.6. I could probably get a note from my doctor.7. I was working things out but I'm over that lava stuff now.8. Please, it's a fucking joke!9. I don't have a problem.
>>214290344>>214290495I gave up after 33, i'm a sham, a failure, i'm so deeply ashamed of myselfCobaltCure for cancerLithiumAliens are filthy fucking heathens worshiping false gods and we need to kill themRutheniumAliens are ignorant heathens and we need to convert themOsmiumAliens are filthy fucking heretics worshiping god wrong and we need to kill themIridiumAliens are misguided heretics and we need to show them the right path to godPalladiumAlien pussyDiamond, I know we can just make these now but women demand authenticity and if we ever ran out we would need to grab more from spaceHot alien dickgoldPlatinumRhodiumextraterrestrial meatextraterrestrial vegetablesextraterrestrial fruitextraterrestrial fishextraterrestrial herbsextraterrestrial spicesextraterrestrial milkextraterrestrial honeyextraterrestrial boozewormhole on the planetcontains the secret to FTL travelancient weaponsfuel for modern weaponsset up a communications relay
>>214287234On Venus, sulphuric acid is like water on Earth, you wouldn't go to Venus and walk around naked, it is absolutely retarded and a truly terrible premise
>>214287621Of course it was his intention. It was about a priest whose faith lapsed. After the events it showed his faith had fully returned. It was always religious
>>214287234This film, juon, and the ring were too much for younger me. I watch them now and really enjoy them.
