Realistically who could defeat him? Reminder that he's never lost.
>>214798010Someone who doesn't care about being a caught, someone who doesn't care about being outsmarted or toyed with, just a complete dirtbag who loves being evil. So because this is /lit/ I'm going to say Carcer Dun.
>>214798010>pokes him in his good eye What now?
>>214798115>Bad eye shoots a lawserbeam at you (Law + Laser) and you are immediately sent to a different scene where he isn't poked in the eye
>>214798010
>>214798010>He's never lostNot true you fake Colombo appreciator
>>214798010Murdoch has never lost a case.
>>214798010>I don't talk to cops
Bateman unironically
>>214798010>I'll be the one asking the questions detective.
>>214798010What would be a kino crossover? Columbo vs Dexter? Columbo vs The Shield?
>>214798492Columbo Meets The Mummy
>>214798461Thing is, Bateman is the quintessential Columbo antagonist: rich, intelligent, and arrogant. The only thing that he has going for him is that he’s unstable and much more violent.>>214798463>>214798492>>214798537Kino. Columbo solos Riddler thoughbeit
>>214798492Both of these would be very good. Columbo vs Tony Soprano or Columbo vs Walter White would make good episodes aswell.
>>214798010He loses to Spock.
>>214798676Dis boy stands zero chance against Columbo
>>214798668>Columbo solos Riddler thoughbeitIt would be a fun watch. Riddler attempting to confuse Columbo wit his best riddles (which usually stump and confuse people), but Columbo just scratches his head, says something like "I'm not much for riddles, yah know", and the sidesteps it and continues questioning the Riddler on a point of evidence.
>>214798705L and his lil bro did basically what Colombo does usually.
>OY WUS ROYPED!He could never have solved this case.inb4>One thing, madam, before I go... You said you were raped, right? It's just that, I could not find a single man who found you attractive. Odd, don't you think?
>>214798436DO I LOOK LIKE A COP?
Columbo would get destroyed and be forced into early retirement in shame
>>214798010He kind of lost to that guy who played Dick in Twin Peaks, but then the guy went and killed after he won.
>>214798010>Do you have any official reason to follow me and ask me questions? No. Then fuck off.>But one more thi...>No. Fuck off!This is it.
>>214798905>Just one more question, Mr. Saw. If none of what you did was illegal, doesn't that mean blackmailing, kidnapping, entrapment, and so on is not illegal?
Columbo vs Lupin IIIdoes Lupin get away?
>>214799052>pokes him in his good eye
>>214799069Columbo arrests him and then Lupin escapes jail. Not Columbo's problem
>>214798010some count of monte cristo esque character whose sort of rich prideful persona is an act so he can get revenge might work. Would be an interesting contrast with columbo who sort of who comes off deceptively simple but in the opposite direction. Might work well as an ending if columbo only catches him after he completes his vengence and he's okay with getting caught... Columbo would technically get him but lose some sense as well
>>214798746Kek that would be awesome
>>214798436>so you wouldnt mind us checking for fingerprints on chris nose then?
>>214798010It'd need to be someone he underestimates, like Irene Adler to Sherlock.Maybe something with ageism. Columbo underestimates a teenager, kids are dumb, impatient, etc. He ends up thinking only one step ahead of him instead of two. Teen gets away. Columbo (and the audience) learns something about himself and the youth of today.Notice I'm actually writing a plot here, and not doing the powerranking "my badguy can beat your detective" thing.
>>214798010Could he catch him in less than 17 years?
>>214799069It would be one of those scenes where Lupin tricks Columbo into a room and locks him in, barricades the entrance, and sprints into his waiting car to escape. As he drives away, Columbo appears in the back seat saying "oh, and err another question, if you dont mind".
>>214798010Distract him by acting confused aswell so he has to drop his act and then work from there.
>it's been half an hour and columbo hasn't even been seen yeti wonder if he was just hella busy making other movies for eps like that.
>>214798010No one can, he'll just send them to the columbo dimension
>>214799350In the early Columbo episodes if you don't see his face, there is a decent chance it's a stand-in.
>>214798436Agent Harris tricked Tony into ratting on Muslim criminals under the excuse of combating terrorism. Tony was an informant, just for a much smaller subsection of his criminal enterprise than if he also ratted on Italians. Columbo would use this.
>>214798815>It's the oddest thing, you say there are little gray men, but I found this recipet for little gray men disguises in your pocked. Can you explain that?
>>214798010>Realistically who could defeat him?one more thing mr voorhe...ACK!!
Were there any shows where Colombo chased a false lead before catching the real one?By story-structure, he has to get the bad guy in the end, but those are just the snapshots. We could imagine the "full" few days where he's running around in circles before getting his man.So, the alt-Colombo is where the buffoon is wasting time and police resources on literal dindu nuffins while the real criminal is loose.
>>214799428We always see it from the perp's perspective, we don't see Columbo by himself doing stuff
>>214799428Columbo Cries Wolf
Patrick Bateman, if only because the plot demands he's continuously mistaken with other executives and thus gets unintentionally alibied because some will swear under oath they were with him at Dorsia or whatever at the time of the murder
>>214799428>Were there any shows where Colombo chased a false lead before catching the real one?Its like almost half of the episodes.
>>214799544I would love the 'Columbo attempting to follow Bateman into the trendiest clubs and restaurants' scenes.
Columbo cannot be stopped
>>214799393It's not clear whether or not they were terrorists or just criminals. Either way yea Tony has assisted Agent Harris because he thought it was in his interest to do so. Talking to a detective about a homicide he committed is not in his interest at all. The most Columbo would get out of him is a polite conversation, maybe they'd bond a little over their shared heritage, but that's it. Columbo would have to target weak links like Christopher or Paulie.
>>214799654Katey Sagal is hot in that episode.
Simple. Be senile and hot and he lets you get away with it.EZ
I don't answer questions.
>>214799712He only kills bad people so Columbo wouldn't get the case
am i being detained soverign citizen
>>214799021This happens almost every episode, it doesn't work.
>>214798010dick van dyke almost beat him
>>214798782A daring synthesis.
why does columbo act like chili is bad for you it's just meat beans and vegetables
>>214799921People used to think fat is bad for you
>>214799921he doenst act like its bad for you, just says he eats it too much and his diet could use more variety in it.
>>214799276He would have known it was him at the point when Rust looked past him.
>>214799665Definitely within the logic of Sopranos, if they actually were terrorists planning attacks that would make them 'legitimate targets' and safe to rat on. But I can still see Columbo using that mafia logic of when it is and isn't okay to break the rules, to create a series of logical traps for Tony to fall into. He'd probably flip Christopher in the end, maybe even cooperate with someone like Paulie to take Tony down, without bagging the traitor, whether Paulie or someone else.>I guess we wont see each other again, heh>Oh, I wouldn't say that, sir, I wouldn't say that at all... sly smile, chews on cigar, credits rollAt any rate I think this episode would be pretty good with a rushed ending but working similar to the episode Bye-Bye Sky High where it relies as much on the perp getting worn down rather than straight up tricked. Christopher of course flips, and maybe has a happy ending, or is killed as the second victim that locks down Tony as the murderer.
>>214798690No, he found the suture spock planted on him.
>>214799320>woman with model-tier ass>Columbo says he's an Architect typehe will never lose
>>214798010say "i dont talk to cops without a lawyer" and get away with murder cause columbo never produces any evidence worth a shit in court