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Red pill me about Hallmark.
Why is Emilia Clarke in a million Hallmark movies and why do Hallmark Movies about a single mother bird watching or some could hosting football players out draw aew wrestling every week?
>>
They tap into a specific feeling, the intense nostalgia that most Americans have for Christmas. That's for starters. Creating a movie or TV show about warm and fuzzy feelings about Christmas is like starting on second base. Then you add in that they usually have two attractive people as the main leads, and unlike a lot of stuff that Hollywood makes, the two leads are almost always exactly in the same realm of attractiveness, so you don't get any weird resentment or disbelief you get with some media when it's like a schlubby fat guy with a hot girl or whatever. Anyway, so just like pleasant people to look at...the stakes are always really low so you don't have to be like that invested in it... you know you never really going to be challenged, and you're probably going to feel happy about the ending if you stick it out. The sets and the set design is usually pretty cozy. And also feels like these movies are shot over the course of like two weeks or something, which kind of has an element of how the story is like really self-contained.

Long story short, it's a pleasant thing to throw on in the background.
>>
>>215117108
there was a coup from the full house girl so hallmark started upping their stars from D-list tv soap opera and sitcom stars into C-list movie and premium cable actresses. the quality has gone up on their big productions too.
>>
>>215116842
Why would the second most popular brand of men in speedos playfighting each other ever out draw an institution as cherished as Hallmark Movies?
>>
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>>215116842
she's a trash actress
>>
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>>215117276
I wish we saw more of her.
>>
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>>215117382
oh no she still has a movie series on hallmark, the other one candace cameron went to american whatever channel. jodie sweetin got a boob job i guess and dresses like a clown grandma to solve mysteries. she sings very badly. thicc tho.
>>
>>215117579
>>215117382
How rude!
>>
>>215116842
Emilia Clarke should be in hundreds of Christmas movies, she's just so comfy and embodies the jolliness of the season.
>>
>>215116842
Idk but they have the audience of 60 year old women locked the fuck down if my mom and her friends are anything to go by.
>>
>>215118342
She almost 40 now. We need a newer model.
>>
She is an atrocious actress and she's also not even that attractive.
>>
>>215116842
Looks cute and comfy
>>
>>215118602
she's very cute and not so much sexy. also blonde. hallmark is big on that.
>>
>>215118484
Personally, I don't mind. She's still cute.
>>
>>215116842
Emilia Clarke is in 1 Christmas movie
>>
>>215118630
a woman over 30 being primarily described as "cute" is an issue
>>
>>215118650
no cute is for all ages and species and so on. being an unmarried childless degenerate at her age is an issue though.
>>
>>215116842
Hallmark realized that the only story 99% of women want to watch is "self-insert gets fucked by chad" and women will watch that same story over and over endlessly as long as they change one or two details and swap out the actors
>>
>>215118709
theyre really strict on the chads too, since hallmark mandates high heels at all times they often have to hire really tall dudes and then they can't even fit into frame right. its a weird alternate universe they have set up for themselves.
>>
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HEY WALL
>>
>>215118764
She looks fine.
>>
>>215118484
it's crazy she's still under 40
>>215118650
holy shit you are one fat tranny
>>
>>215118709
Is that Superman?
>>
>>215118709
wait isn't that fucking superman?
>>
>>215118796
yeah but he worked on CW dc shows for like a decade so hallmark is not a steep fall
>>
>>215118709
My mom watches them constantly and I can't tell you how many of them are "business focused city woman moves to small town, meets single father Chad and discovers the real meaning of Christmas"
>>
>>215118821
they have an event called "Christmas in July" because their library of films is like 80% christmas themed.
>>
>>215118796
>>215118809
"Superman bangs a dumpy catlady" was so popular it got a sequel
>>
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>>215116842
She's a really horrible actress but she's very endearing with how expressive she is and she seems really nice
>>
>>215118845
cartoon network used to have that
>>215118882
does he bang a different woman? how do you have a sequel to
>mid catlady bang superman
?
>>
>>215118941
>does he bang a different woman? how do you have a sequel to >mid catlady bang superman?

No, same chick. IIRC in the second movie they had broken up and the cat was dying or pregnant or something so he came back to see it and she gets to bang her ex again
>>
>>215118882
the dumpy cat lady was actually probably the main star for hallmark audience. she was on charmed as the mommyest sister
>>
>>215118630
>also blonde
she's not a blonde, rajesh
>>
>>215118794
>you're tranny
this accusation means nothing coming from someone who got tricked into thinking Emlia Clarke is attractive by Game of Thrones
let me guess, you think Maisie Williams is hot too
>>
>>215116842
She was in this one movie where she accidentally kills a guy and then falls in love with his ghost. When it's revealed he's dead at the end we realize she's hallucinated the entire movie and is dangerously insane. Also the entire soundtrack is nothing but George Michael songs. It's fucking weird.
>>
>>215119219
you are seething because someone called a woman in her 30s cute.
you are fat and either a tranny or a femoid that's so ugly you might as well be a tranny
>>
>>215119316
She didn't kill him, he got isekai'd and she recieved his heart as a transplant
>>
>>215119316
why is he a chinaman?
>>
>>215118764
If I woke up next to that, I'd involuntarily commit domestic violence of the swiftest degree.
>>
>>215119388
Murdering bitch

>>215119393
Emilia is extremely racist
>>
>>215119388
Based. All Chinese people should donate their organs to Westerners.
>>
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>>215119417
Dangerously based
>>
>>215118925
>>215118764
>>215116842
Isn't she missing half her brain?
>>
Hallmark rocks I have no problem with Hallmark or chick flicks I just wish we had something similar
>>
>>215119582
Anon, she's a woman.
>>
>>215119582
which half?
>>215119593
master and commander
>>
>>215119624
kek
>>
>>215119652
pre-2010~ hallmark actually did some decent budget adventure movies/miniseries. also some manlier mystery series than
>library girl mysteries
>thrift shop girl mysteries
>wedding planner mysteries
>wedding caterer mysteries
and so on
>>
>>215119393
Emilia Clarke is part Indian, she’s being sucked into his Asian magnetic pull
>>
>>215119582
still more intelligent than you bozo
>>
>>215116842
Hallmark movies are sign that America could heal
>>
Hallmark movies are femslop but they do have reasonably decent production quality. They're generally consistent with what they dish out. I'm sure all of their viewers wish there was more rape in them.
>>
Hallmark movies simply just know their demographic, and they're not going to kill their golden goose by trying to branch out into other ones like basically every ruined franchise has.
I think I respect them more than other productions, even if I have no desire to watch them.
>>
>>215119698
why the fuck was patrick stewart in a hallmark movie?
>>
>>215119749
>Clarke is of Indian descent on her mother's side, as her maternal grandmother was a natural daughter between Clarke's great-grandmother and a man from British India.
Sounds like she's just white and doesn't know that Anglo-Indian meant a white person. I don't think they were letting Indian men marry British women back then.
>>
>>215119815
Probably short filming schedule, decent wage for the amount of work required and free trip to Panama.
>>
>>215119859
>>215119815
i think he prefers going for "serious" roles doing classics like a real actor but due to trek stink he only gets TV movies.
>>
>>215116842
I need to fart in her mouth
>>
>>215119905
Every actor is willing to whore themselves out for a cheque every now and again and it's not like he's an actor demanding $20 million a movie or anything. I don't think him doing such a small role is all that surprising.
>>
>>215119973
its a made-for-tv jules verne sandwiched between a TV dickens and 2 TV shakespeares. he has a type but also a hard ceiling.
>>
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>>215119316
>directed by PAUL FEIG
>>
>>215120058
yeah, written by emma thompson and directed by paul fag with licensed music. this is not a hallmark movie poster.
>>
>>215117108
And they pump them out until one has the right sets and vibes for you.
A Time Traveler's Wife always felt like a Christmas movie to me.
>>
Hallmark movies have a special place in my heart. A few years ago I had sex with a woman who had a small role in a Christmas Hallmark movie.
>>
>>215119316
Kino
>>215119388
Would be even more kino if Hallmark did Isekai's of attractive ladies into other Chrismas worlds.
>"We're about to assault the Demon King's castle in two weeks! But it's Christmas first."
>>
>>215117579
those tits are pretty great
>>
>>215116842
it was pretty fun for a holyday movie and she was kinda thick in this
>>
>>215120121
I'd pump Emilia Clarcke, and pumping I mean fucking if you catch my drift.
>>
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>>215120228
i have at least two more of her movies to slog through so maybe i'll do one tonight. she always looks like she has a fat ass in stage singing scenes but then in clown grandma mode zero ass. extremely dishonest. she's also very low on the cleavage scale for hallmark.
>>
>>215119905
>>215119973
>>215120013
I guess
>it's jules verne
counts as high theater since it's jules verne
>>
>>215120058
>ghostbusters 2016
>>
>>215120185
I wonder if that would work with women liking lotr now
>>
>>215119905
Wasn't he in Lifeforce before Star Trek
>>
>>215120590
he needed the money
>>
>>215119582
Yeah I fucked the other half through her arse.
>>
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>get stuck watching a Hallmark movie
>pull out phone
>look up the lead actress's nude scenes from back when she wasn't so old
>>
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>>215118764
>OMG YOU LOOK OLDER THAN 25 REEEEEEEE I CAN NOT FUCK YOU REEEE

Why are you ghey?
>>
My dream life would be starting my career as an actor in my early 20s doing shitty horror movies and gaining a small following as a "scream king" then moving on to doing hallmark movies in my late 20s and early 30s then from like 35 to 45 I'd be one of the cops in a CSI-esque show then after that I would just semi-retire, maybe I'd show up in one of those direct to video westerns with Stephen Dorff and those guys
>>
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>>215119316
Emilia Clarke, Michelle Yeoh, Emma Thompson. Why wasn't this a bigger hit?
>>
>>215116842
i saw the CEO of Starz talk about his network or channel or brand, whatever it is. he openly said they just make tv and movies for white black and latino women, probably single, probably drinkers, who want to put something on tv while they sit on the sofa and scroll on their phone. the show or movie doesn't really matter, it can't be complex. the Starz viewer wants a repeat of the thing they saw before but with some differences and novelty. that is what women want in regards to everything: what they enjoyed before but with some novelty.
i would guess hallmark is the same. it isn't highbrow art. it is something to put on tv when you don't want your house to be quiet and you want to half do something else.
maybe some exec has a crush on Emilia Clarke and wants to cast her and also because she is cheap as no one else is calling her
>>
>>215120710
lose weight, tranny
>>
>>215120809
chinaman leading man
>>
>>215120848
>white black and latino women
why not just say women, that covers pretty much everything. unless he's specifically avoiding appealing to asian women
>>
>>215116842
What else is she gonna star in? Her post GoT career has been pretty shit. She also got unlucky in that her entry into MCU was in a tv show that even normalfags hate and are trying to pigeonhole its existence.
>>
>>215120185
>>215119388
kek when you put it like that, hallmark should start buying the licensing to all those otomege isekai LNs. Seems perfect for their audience.
>>
>>215120945
>joins star wars right when it goes to shit
>joins mcu right when it goes to shit
>joins terminator when it was shit for decades
>>
>>215120992
Heh, I forgot she actually was in SW and Terminator as well. She sure knows how to pick doomed franchises.
>>
>>215120992
>>215121019
The only reason she got nude in later seasons of GOT is because Terminator did so poorly.
>>
>>215119316
>>215120809
It's in regular rotation on tv. It's one of those movies that didn't do well at the box office but has found a second life in syndication.
>>
>>215119815
He probably should've starred in more hallmark movies instead of making Picard, ruining his legacy and laying the final turd on the grave of star trek.
>>
>>215118764
She looks alright for a 40yo woman. She seems to be aging more gracefully than Emma Watson, even with that brain surgery she had. All she needs is to gain some weight and she is perfect
>>
>>215116842
Emilia Clarke is BVILT for Hallmark schlock
>>
She is Indian. 4hpy4
>>
Sex with Emilia Clarke's feet
>>
>>215117382
oh wow so her tits are fake
>>
how come women are allowed their own slop factories but there is nothing being made for male audiences?
>>
>>215122780
Bro, your Fast and Furious franchise? Your Michael Bay movies?
>>
>>215122788
yes those movies about big burly men in homoerotic relationships... women hate that stuff
>>
>>215118925
Yeah, can’t really act much and it’s particularly distracting if she has to play tough but extremely charming and goofy in interviews which could be used very well if they gave her the right roles
>>
>>215122812
Guess the issue is that women also like stuff targeted at guys but the reverse doesn't happen.
>>
>>215117108
Fuck off ai nigger
>>
>>215116842
She looked incredible through 8 seasons of Game of Thrones, literally one of the most beautiful women alive. She should dress up as Daenerys all the time.
>>
>>215119905
All his appearances on American Dad do nothing but degrade his character but he's on record saying he loves doing it
>>
>>215118484
40 is the right time to transition into "single mother finds a new man who teaches her the meaning of Christmas with his penis" roles
>>
>>215116842
>some could hosting football players out draw aew wrestling every week?
what
>>
>>215118764
Would still wed and bed.
>>
>>215122849
Generally speaking the stuff targeted at men have all sorts of "general audience" qualities as well like a focus on family, romance, just cause fighting and so on. These movies are simply written with the assumption that there are some women in the audience. Media designed entirely for men are things like a 30 minute tutorial om how to use sandpaper.
>>
If you married and had kids with Emilia Clarke 15 years ago that be a cozy life
>>
>>215118709
99% of goodreads romantasy in a nutshell
>>
>>215123022
Good Morning Sir!
>>
>>215116842
She hasn't
>>
>>215123079
Women generally don't like anything that is devoid of romance and focuses on combat to an autistic level. Good examples would be 40k or DBZ. Practically nonexistent female fans.

Marvel films were a good example of something that appealed to both, because there was fighting, but they made the male characters attractive and there was romance. The male characters generally weren't autistically obsessed with fighting. For example, if Captain America had Goku's personality, women wouldn't have liked him hardly at all.
>>
>>215116842
Because her career is deas
>>
>>215116842
>Red pill me about Hallmark.
Family movies about love and christmas and other stuff
>Why is Emilia Clarke in a million Hallmark movies
She is not getting any other kind of work presumably, anons says its because she is shit at acting but i can never tell
>why do Hallmark Movies about a single mother bird watching or some could hosting football players out draw aew wrestling every week?
Because middle-america loves shit like that?
>>
>>215117382
She looks like a scuffed Mischa Barton
>>
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>>215117382
she sure looks like a D-lister
>>
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>>215124637
Personally I'm seeing that saimese twin except with one head.
>>
>>215120058
He's a man's man
>>
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>>215116842
>>215117579
>>215118764
>>215118925
>>
>>215116842
THIS is the ultimate fate of the darling of Game of Cucks, the flash in the pan normalfag fad of the 2010's!?!?! OHH HA HA HA HA HA!! HOO HOO HOO!!!
>>
>>215116842
I watched The Shoe Addict's Christmas. You know how lots of boomers making their job their entire personality? Yeah that's the entire movie except there's also some Christmas stuff. The I tried watching another about some ski resort and stopped watching after 20 minutes of people endlessly yapping about their jobs. Boomers work their entire life so they can then retire and watch movies about people working, insane.
>>
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>>215118764
Looks great loser
>>
>>215117364
they're making her burn coal now?
>>
>>215116842
>why do Hallmark Movies about a single mother bird watching or some could hosting football players out draw aew wrestling every week?
Huh?
>>
>>215118764
Looks like she could play aoc there.
>>
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I still love her
>>
>>215126218
I want to suckle Emilia mommy's sweater puppies
>>
>>215126218
Dresses come with boob-pouches now?
>>
>>215126218
why would anyone wear this sweater??
>>
>>215116842
women
>>
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>>215118709
You have to admit, they know their audience. It's almost the time of year when their output kicks into high gear.
>>
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Emilia still isn't over Jason
>>
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>>215116842
Hallmark movies need to be more hard-hitting. How about a Hallmark movie that deals with domestic violence or spousal homicide?
>>
>>215123079
>>215124379
The thing Hollywood doesn't know or doesn't care to find out is that men also like romance movies it's just they refuse to make any specified to male tastes. There's a massive market for it in East Asia.
>>
>>215127080
That's the slut from Sex and the city. Guess her career fell on hard times
>>
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>I'm dreaming of a White Christmas
bit racist
>>
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>>215116842
>why do Hallmark Movies about a single mother bird watching or some could hosting football players out draw aew wrestling every week?
>>
>>215127379
Black people don't celebrate Christmas, they have Kwanza. These movies are not for them.
>>
>>215119624
So she's only got a quarter brain?
>>
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>>215127080
>>215127379
>>215116842
Bros, are you ready for Avatar Hallmark Christmas?!
>>
>>215119593
When similar stories get made for men, women shriek that they're "manic pixie dream girl" stories for loser men and should be cancelled.
Women are huge hypocrites and can't stand men enjoying anything.
>>
>>215127437
Based Hallmark
>>
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>>215116842
pokies
>>
>>215120848
Can confirm, my mom "watches" Hallmark movies all day when she's off work and spends more time looking at her phone than the movie.
>>
>>215127601
She has very pretty hair. I think I should probably jizz in it.
>>
>>215118764
Like she’d give your neckbeard ass the time of day.
>>
>>215127601
aaaaahhhhh she was so pretty
>>
>>215119905
Pretty sure you can get this nigga to sing christmas carols in front of your house alongside Snoop Dogg for the right price
>>
>>215116842
>some could hosting football players out draw aew wrestling every week?
150 replies and no one else is confused by this incoherent niggerbabble?
>>
>>215122855
More than an average amount of text in a post doesn't mean AI you retarded fucking newfag.
>>
>>215127379
Ironic considering the song was written by a Jew. As was every single other American Christmas 'classic'.
>>
>>215127230
Could you name some good examples? Genuinely intetested.
>>
>>215116842
Because she hasn't. Your image literally has the Universal logo. Is everyone on /tv/ fucking retarded?
>>
>>215127529
Women's sweaters always look so cozy
>>
>>215127914
It goes into way too much detail and breaks it up like ai. Plus, no sane person knows that much about hallmark christmas movies other than single mothers and cat ladies, both of which don't surf 4chan. Nigga.
>>
>>215127080
>Christmas Cookies
That's her vagene I'm guessing?
>>
>>215128310
I think it's a sequel to Festive Buns.
>>
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>>215128135
>>
>>215118709
what's wrong with her face?!
>>
>>215126218
Nice tit sleeves.
>>
>>215127080
>a very merry mix-up
I have seen over 100 hallmark movies
That one is actually good
Broken clock twice a day I suppose
>>
>>215128809
i'd say theres more actually good hallmark movies than unwatchably bad ones, most are very bland unless you like the specific D-lister whose career they resuscitated
>>
>>215127177
>A very bloody christmas
>>
>>215118709
to be fair, I can watch the "dude gets wronged, takes matters into his own hands and guns down all the bad guys" with variations endlessly, too
>>
>>215117108
>resentment at men for dating hot girls
Kill yourself you stupid fucking bitch.
>>
>>215128809
qrd?
>>
>>215116842
>Emilia has a post-GoT career appearing in Hallmark slop

good for her
>>
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>>215120654
W E W
L
A
D
>>
>>215119698
They used to make so much adventure/fantasy kino. What happened?
>>
>>215129031
There is exactly one plot twist you won't see coming. Which is one more than any of the other ones I've seen. Just download it and watch it during Christmas holidays and enjoy some comfy kino.
>>215127379
They made one a couple years ago with a black guy, it must have done poorly in the ratings because I only saw it happen once
>>
>>215127080
I know it sounds weird, but as the season approaches I would be fine with having these on in the background. I have a feeling I might enjoy them for their atmosphere alone.
>>
>>215129213
>What happened?
Lonely women don't flick their beans to adventure flicks. Advertisers want their products in front of horny lonely women, simple as
>>
>>215117108
This.

The fact that you can watch the Hallmark channel all day long and fill your house with the sounds of life and happiness while you set about your daily tasks and chores and hobbies cannot be understated. The main attraction of these stories is that you can walk out on them for 10, 20, or even 30 minutes and then come back to them and still feel like you pretty much know what's going on.

It's not like Full Metal Jacket where you leave to take a shit in the middle and you come back and it's like, "Where's the drill instructor guy? What happened to Lawrence?" The story of every Hallmark movie is the same from start to finish. You can miss MORE THAN HALF THE MOVIE and still feel like you got it. And if a movie comes on that you don't like, guess what, go do a load of laundry and then clean out one of the refrigerator shelves and then put a roast in the slow-cooker and guess what, there's a new movie on and you took care of laundry and dinner. Ahh!

That's the whole idea. It's almost like a domestic aid more than "entertainment" as such. It's hilarious to even compare it with "aew wrestling."

It's two completely different sports, kid.
>>
>>215116842
>Why is Emilia Clarke in a million Hallmark movies
She is?
Name 3.
>>
>>215129851
>Emilia's Friday
>Emilia Strikes Back
>Emilia's Revenge
>Emilia: The New Blood
>Emilia Takes New York
>Emilia's Last Chance
>Emilia's New Beginning
>>
>>215118641
She is but there's hotter women out there now that can act better.
>>215122998
That has potential.
>>
>>215118709
>>215118821
Yup, my mom hates my dad and she watches them all the time
>>
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>>215118925
Terminator was such an miscast but she looked really hot there.
She belongs to romcoms and feelgood movies, wish she could be in some male romcom but its too late.
>>
>>215130158
So none then.
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Just over a week until Countdown to Christmas. Anything you are looking forward to?
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>>215130791
i am all about them hallmark mysteries so misteltoe murders yes. hallmark linking up with opry is interesting.
>oy to the world
>With the last night of Hanukkah and Christmas Eve falling on the same day this year – something that rarely happens – the reverend and rabbi choose to offer a joint service for their congregations.
thats some ambition there
>>
>>215130993
All of the Jew ones I've watched have been bretty good
>>
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>>215130791
>holiday touchdown: a bills love story
So are yearly NFL themed Christmas movies going to be a thing now? Last year was the Chiefs. This year is the Bills.
>>
>>215131870
depends who they can get a deal with probably. hallmark will make a movie out of any household name you can provide.
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>>215127763
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My mom watches Hallmark every year from October through the New Years.

I caught her watching it last week, and there were 2 gays kissing followed by a Bollywood dance number at a wedding.

Hallmark has fallen. Watch Great American Channel
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>>215132232
i dont actually own a tv or have cable but great american was supposed to expand into mystery shit did that happen?
>>
>>215132387
They're working on it
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>>215118764
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>>215121044
she has a nude scene in the very first episode, no?
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My mom loves to watch this stuff and it makes me really sad. I wish I had a big house, wife, and kids, just so I could decorate the house and have her over every year for the holidays.
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>>215133001
go build one or something
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>>215126218
>how to make your little titties look disgusting
jfc
>>
This random ass Hallmark movie stuck with me because of how bizarre, traumatic and bittersweet it was.

I later discovered that it was a ruthlessly ripped off, gender-flipped remake of the Nicholas Cage movie, "The Family Man"
I apologize for not having an encyclopedic knowledge of Nicholas Cage comedy-dramas from 25 years ago

But holy fuck what were they thinking, that is not a feel good premise at all
>>
>>215133472
sounds more like lifetime's shtick, i dont remember nick cage's movie either. wasn't it a watered down wonderful life?
>>
>200 post
>no one has pointed out emilia clarke has never been in a hallmark movie
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>>215122788
fast and furious is gay and bay hasn't made a good movie since like 2002
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>>215133472
>Can you pronounce your full name? Daphne...
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>>215124379
DBZ has romance and there are female dbz fans.
I will give you warhammer is just dudes and troons and for some reason GW cares more about the troons
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>>215123079
>>215122812
>>215122780
master and commander
>>
>>215126218
what the fuck is she wearing?
>>
I actually had an idea for a hallmark movie that is a SLIGHT subversion of them. Well it's not really an idea but you just make a normalone and they going through the story as normal. Then you make the "sequel" to that from the perspective of the partner/evil ex but this time the main characters from the previous movie are seen as the villains. Keep everything the same. Same town, same problems, same side characters same sassy black woman giving advice. Play the movies back to back and see if anyone watching notices.
>>
>>215126460
>>215123022
*some couple hosting football players*
everyone posts tv ratings for wrestling on /pw/ and every week some weird hallmark movie gets better ratings than gayew wrestling
>>
>>215133976
the thing about that idea is that non-murder hallmark movies dont have villains as such. the conflict mostly comes from family drama and comic misunderstandings.
>>
>>215127379
black ppl don't celebrate they christmas
>>215127413
no, that's hogwheels
>>
>>215133771
It's the anti It's a Wonderful Life
I'll just say the Nick Cage version since I assure you the Hallmark version is the exact same fucking movie with a lower budget and genders reversed

>Nicholas Cage is a rich successful asshole
>although he can't be Ebeneezer Scrooge bad because he goes out of his way to help a vagrant in a dangerous situation he stumbles into
>the vagrant turns out to be a wizard/angel/genie/demiurge and as a "reward" for his help hurtles him into an alternate universe
>in the alternate universe, he didn't break up with his college girlfriend
>they're married, have kids and live in a middle class suburban house, struggling with menial work and debt
>at first he's completely dumbfounded because he obviously didn't live through or remember any of this shit but he plays along and adapts
>he fairly quickly realizes how fucking AWESOME this actually is compared to banging hookers on coke in five star hotels on every continent while closing billion dollar contracts
>an entire godamn month of this passes and he gradually grows to accept "Okay whatever this is life now, pretty cool"
>then one morning he wakes up
>alone
>in his million dollar penthouse
>there's a cope epilogue where he tracks down his college ex-girlfriend and asks her out for coffee and she goes "Sure" like that fucking makes up for it
>>
>>215134010
Evil Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend who doesn't want one of the leads to do *thing* is a staple of the genre.
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>>215133909
>for some reason GW cares more about the troons
Troons are usually massive pay piggies willing to invest way more into a single hobby than your average normal person.
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>>215134042
more like
>uninvolved ex-girlfriend/boyfriend comes to visit the hometown
>other romantic party sees them and misunderstands everything
i dont know if i've ever seen real obstruction
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>>215134032
Mister Scrooge, who taught you to use a computer?
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>>215129213
>>215129630
they probably have less competition in the middle aged women demo and advertisers like the middle aged women demo more because most consumer spending is the wife buying shit
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>>215134076
You're being intentionally obtuse for no reason or maybe you just haven't really watched many of these movies?
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>>215130334
why does he have 3 drinks?
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>>215130369
wasn't she fat when they filmed it?
>>215130791
why the fuck do they state before Halloween?
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>>215134163
at least one of them is hair product
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>>215132232
why are they on in october? why are the on before Halloween?
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>>215130791

>Mistletoe Murders

a daring synthesis
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>>215132971
she stopped getting naked during the middle seasons after she renegotiated her contract or something. she was naked in the first season all the time because she was only in like sharknado or something equally shitty before GoT and even got naked in breakfast at tiffanies on broadway or london or something and then by the mid seasons she thought she was going to hollywood so she stopped getting naked then transformers flopped so she got naked again, but there was a big joke about how she only got naked like once during the middle seasons
>>
>>215134268
You can't put that shit on her because Game of Thrones reduced its sex scenes by 90% after season 3 or 4, nobody got naked or fucked anymore
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>>215133472
>But holy fuck what were they thinking,
hey we can take this nick cage script, change the pronouns and put out a new film with no additional work or money
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>>215130791
>>215134211
>>215132232
s̶̢̡̰̭̤̫̰̣̱̳͈̙̦̙̣͓̕h̸̢̛͇̻̼̦̬̯̓͆͑̊̎̾̆͂̔̒͊̾̊͘̚͠ͅḙ̴̢̱̘̝̞͖̳̗͚̟̫̮̊̂͌͗̕ͅͅ ̴̡̨͔͓̞̻̗̜̣̠̀̈́͝c̵̥͍͖̩͕̬̣̰̙̳͋̃̓ơ̴̥͓͎̼͙͕̼̯͖͊̂̔͋̈͐͆͘̕m̵̨̤͙̝̤͎̗̺̫̣̑͑͋̓͋̔͑͋̈́͑̒͗̒̓͝ę̴̹͍͈̫̭̺̣̻̇͐̇̏̐͜ş̷̹̟̩͍̬͓̞̮̪̐̐̎̽̎͑̈́̆̕̚͠͠͠
>>
>>215134113
Nigger the magic hobo created, then murdered his children in front of him

Elizabeth Olsen murdered like a thousand people after that happened to her in Dr. Strange and she was considered a sympathetic villain
>>
>>215127236
charlotte was not a slut, that was samantha.
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>>215130369
damn she looks like a 10/10 fucktoy there, gave me a chubby
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>>215134032
>they took the kids
>the genie took the kids
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>>215134364
the actress is probably a slut
>>
>>215134047
where's the holocaust denier ork player meme?
>>
>>215131649
>Hanuka
lmao jews are so pathetic
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>>215134183
why is he drinking a hair product at a table read?
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>>215116842
Emilia's a cute
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>>215134677
Very!
>>
>ywn be the no-nonsense executive vice president of a vague multinational corporation sent to scout a sleepy village filled with charming people over a period of several weeks before falling in love with the beautiful, wholesome B&B owner’s niece who swore to stop your expansion plans and discover the meaning of Christmas along the way
>>
>>215118796
>>215118809
Damn straight
>>
>>215135050
I don't get why brandon rough, the guy from smallville and dean cain are all instantly recognizable as superman but none of the modern fags are
>>
>>215116842
>why do Hallmark Movies about a single mother bird watching or some could hosting football players out draw aew wrestling every week?
2 different audiences. hallmark channel viewers are people like pic related. AEW audience are nerds obsessed with workrate over actual storytelling
>>
>>215135335
>favorite book
>Exodus
Why??? That part has literally nothing to do with Christianity and it's all complete fabrication. Like, no serious Jewish historian believes that any of that happened.
>>
>>215118764
Still love her.
>>
>>215135982
it's got some kind of cool shit. that's where got tells moses and aaron his name is
>I am
and where all the babalionian storm god who killed the other gods conspiricy theories come from
in the original language it's not even called exodus, it's called
>names
>>
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Alicia Witt made a shitload of Hallmark Christmas Movies and for that I thank them
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>>215136317
fuckin d girl
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>>215117579
I thought this Pic was frank Reynolds as the trash man.gxp8k
>>
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>>215118764
Mournful
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>>215119105
That’s not Holly Marie Combs, get your eyes checked
>>
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SPOILER: She eats the guy's heart
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>>215136371
So hot.
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>>215136477
why are girls so cruel?
>>
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>>215116842
>Why is Emilia Clarke in a million Hallmark movies
Your very question is faulty
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>>215136477
i fucking loathe michelle yeoh. i remember when crouching tiger came out and i thought she was fine but then she started showing up in other movies and it was always the same garbage.
>>
>>215118764
she will be fine she gets tons of eyebrow exercise should keep the bags away and the skin taut
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>>215136565
EMILIA NO
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>>215118764
YOU'RE AN OLD STAR
GET YOUR BOTOX ON
NOW PAY
>>
>>215136655
She’s clearly not using any Botox and is letting her self age naturally which is refreshing as most celebrities her age will use Botox and plastic surgeries to the point they look like an alien but Emilia isn’t and it makes me love her even more
>>
>>215126218
It looks like they were making sausages but ran out of meat so just little bit is poking out.
>>
>>215122780
it would hurt wamen's feelings
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>>215116842
>Why is Emilia Clarke in a million Hallmark movies
She had a stroke and almost died
>>215117276
>there was a coup from the full house girl
wut
>>
>>215137069
Candace Cameron-Bure, Hallmark channel's #1 headliner, jumped on controversy about gays to jump ship to join upstart Great American Family channel and steal a huge chunk of viewership and other hallmark regulars. There was an appropriate amount of drama.
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>>215131649
This. Loving Leah with Timothee Chalamet is bretty good too
>>
which of these movies have women with nice asses
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>>215118709
If you were Chad you wouldn’t be saying this
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>>215137717
id have to give that a think, they dont wear a lot of tight fitting dresses or trousers. I think the sidekick milf on the Garage Sale Mysteries had a pretty big ass, she cute.
>>
>>215136371
Why did she wear pasties
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>>215119905
He voiced the poop emoji, anon
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>>215116842
>Why is Emilia Clarke in a million Hallmark movies and why do Hallmark Movies about a single mother bird watching or some could hosting football players out draw aew wrestling every week?
It's an easy check, an easy production, Emilia Clarke doesn't have to do a years-long dedication to the production and potentially see it all end horribly like with Game of Thrones, and Hallmark rom-coms have an audience with women.

It's literally that simple.
>>
>>215126218
Those thangs used to look a lot better



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