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Are you employed, sir?

Yeah but being a slacker isn't cool anymore

>>215419056
The more "proper" I get (the more respectable my job becomes, the more money I make, the fancier my own owned homed looks, the bigger and more expensive my car is), the further I stray from normalcy and acceptance.

>>215419095
bedrotting is in

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>>215419056
Do you have an Etsy shop sir?!

>>215419056
He's literally me only i'm balding and not cool

>>215419144
Better than going out on a weekday and advertising that you are broke and unemployed

>>215419056
I haven't figured out how to consistently live off a small amount of earnings I don't have to go to work for to pay for my super small cheap place. Can you still take out an insane number of loans from a college or did they stop that finally. I guess I could be a drug dealer.

>>215419234
Life Hack
>go to doctor for a physical
>get a $500,000 life insurance plan for around $20/ month
>contact a major bank
>ask if they want to buy your life insurance plan
>they will pay you half of the payout and then takeover the monthly payments and cash in when you die
My uncle Bob did this and now he’s crazy rich because he used the money to invest in real estate. I don’t know why I haven’t done it yet but I will.

Why doesn't he just blow up the supermarket

>>215419646
Every single person that isn't already rich would do this if it was as easy as you described. Surely you must have left out a lot of important details and conditions.

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Yes.

>>215419056
It's impossible to live comfily nowadays

>>215419056
This actually is 110% my life now that I actually go outside a lot unlike all my NEET years before this one, only problem is I made a really really really stupid mistake this year which cost me a lot of muney so I don’t have as much to play around with now.

>>215419646
Yeah thanks for the tip but I think I'm just gonna deal fent or something. It's certainly all over where I live so barring getting stabbed to death I might be alright.

Going to the store in this outfit was shocking in the 90s but now everyone does it.

Probably. I don't see a way out of this so this it.

>>215419672
Because that would be illegal.

im pretty dudely
except that i deliver groceries/food for a living rather than having settlement money and i have a moustache instead of a goatee
but i love weed and white russians

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Yeah.

>>215420468
>russians
>white
this is your brain on /pol/rot. not very dudely, dude

Pretty much. I walk around looking like a slob, including when I go to the office.

>>215419056
Yes. I'm a dude weed man.

>>215420708
shoo joo

I have the beater car and slacker appearance. I work a bit, just enough to keep afloat. The Dude definitely influenced me significantly.

>>215419056
no, that would require entering a cocoon, and i don't really want to bother with all that

>>215419056
No formal shoes, no tuxedo, no service. When did they stop enforcing that?

>>215419792
I’m sure it’s more difficult now because banks and government are always trying to complicate life hacks, uncle Bob did it in the late 80’s or early 90’s but it can be done.

How the FUCK did he make rent!?

>>215422388
His landlord was literally a retarded pushover...

>>215419056
that's just like your opinion, man

>>215420468
>>215420708
>>215421872
all me btw

>>215422388
he was living off inheritance

>>215422388
the semi-official explanation is that he inherited enough money to comfortably live as a NEET.
I think it was in one of the first drafts of the script

>>215422388
>>215422831
he was supposed to inherit the rubik's cube fortune or some shit but it didn't make it into the movie.

>>215419646
>Hey boss, this guy's life insurance policy we bought out is about to expire and we gave him $250k.
>Let me make a call, we'll have the insurance check by Friday...

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>>215419056

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>>215422388
>How the FUCK did he make rent!?

He didn't. Remember the scene where his landlord shows up and asks him to see his one man show?

I hate drinks that turn base spirits into flavored ethanol.

>>215423950
Whoa, everybody get a load of this BADASS over here!

I'm only missing the bathrobe

>>215423802
Excellent form when he tosses the mug.

>>215423879
nta, but I missed the fact that was his landlord. I just thought he was being a good friend by going to see the guy's show.

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>>215420012
Thanks. New steam profile pic. Take my old one.

>>215422388
He was a roadie for Metallica.

>>215424855
almost like he's say DEH

>>215419646
yeah sorry bro you don't just get 250k like that. your uncle Bob was propably a sex trafficer and had to make up a story for how he got his money

>>215419646
I don't believe you.

>>215422388
he abides.

>>215419056
I honestly don't know anymore

>>215419646
there are several reasons why this is a lie

>>215425851
>several reasons
please go on

>>215425901
nta but why would the bank give you half of that if they could just give you a fraction, and everyone would still do it since it's literally free money

>>215425353
>>215425534
>>215425851
Proof a doodle doo, the retard is: YOU.

>>215425977
just pretending to be retarded, huh?

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>>215419056
I almost did it until my mom died a few months ago.
I was literally being the dude irl, with a big inheritance coming and dressed like a fucking lousy bum 24/7.
Then one day my mom, who's been spending most of this year in and out of hospitals, passed away.
I was devastated, because she was one of the few remaining family members I still had.
Haven't recovered since, please hug your mother while you still can anons.

>>215426551
Sorry about your mom, anon. I know my mom is all I got now and I dread the day I lose her.

>>215426601
Please please PLEASE.
Hug her and tell her how much you love her.
It sounds stupid now thats shes alive and well, but believe me it wont seem stupid on the day she will be gone.

>>215419095
You haven't reached your final form if anything "being cool" even enters your mind.

>>215419056
finality is just like an opinion, man.

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>>215426551
>>215427087
Solid reminder, I was tripping on the thought of my mom dying a few days ago. Hope things get better.

>>215419095
Was it ever?

>>215419056
He's literally me

>>215419089
Currently in between jobs

What if The Dude was a GAMER?

>>215419056
I'd be fine with being a loser if i just had sex once. It's just eating me up inside. I can't enjoy anything anymore. I feel like shit.

>>215430372
oof

Why do I find supermarket shots so strangely comfy?
Maybe I have brain damage

>>215430372
I had sex multiple times but now I'm back to being an incel shutin loser. I know it's easy to say but in the grand scheme of things it doesn't really change much

>>215430902
because shopping at a supermarkt when it's not during rush hour and almost empty and you have nothing is else to do is extremely relaxing and tranquil

>>215419095
Yeah? Well, you know, that’s like your opinion man.

>>215419056
I went to university at age 30, in my 3rd year now. Racking up debt, no real prospects. I will never be as comfy as The Dude.

>bro watch the big lebowski!
OK what's it about?
>it's the coen brothers firing on all cylinders!
Right but what's it about?
>it's so funny, dude that's your opinion, the dude abides lmao
Yes but what's the actual goddamn story?
>just watch it brah
Jesus christ

>>215419056
being a wealthy guy who got to retire early? no buy sounds comfy

>>215419056
He's literally me except he makes it look cool somehow

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i reached my final form 10 years ago, only thing left to do is to wizen up and turn gray

>>215430947
If you want a plot synopsis, you can read one on wikipedia. Nobody else should be expected to do write it out on your behalf when you can check it yourself MUCH faster.
You are acting like a little baby. A spoiled little baby. This website has certain rules. Not spoonfeeding retards, nor acting like a retard asking to be spoonfed, is one of them.

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>>215430997
You will give me the back of box blurb right now

>>215425935
Half of your life insurance as a payout is a fraction. Covering the low monthly payments gives them easy bucks.

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>>215430372
Hey virgin
How does it feel to know that a Chad like me is having sex with more women in a week than what you'll ever fuck in your whole entire kissless virgin life HAHAHAHAHA

pic related is what a stud looks like

People that say being a neet is as bad as working are coping.

The grass literally is greener. The literal only downside to being a neet is the societal pressure to be a worker bee, you feel shame for not taking part in the same shit everyone else hates doing. When you get over that shame it's literally a better life, objectively.

>>215431053
Sure, go ahead with it and report back when you have your 250k

>>215419095
It isn't cool but the alternative is employment and that is the death of the soul

>>215431106
I'd say there's a difference in quality of life because as a neet you can't afford anything

>>215431176
I'm happier not being able to afford shit than I am being able to afford shit but having my time raped by a job, being around people I don't want to be around fucking all day long

>>215431106
ive been both
i can easily say it depends on the persons mental, i can play vidya or watch movies and hang out in discord for 24 hours a day and not bat an eye, i can also go to work for 8 hours a day easily if its engaging (i like physical labor like constuction) i genuinely prefer being a NEET but there are other people (normies) that literally cannot go a week without leaving their house before they get suicidal and depressed or whatever

>>215431212
>cannot go a week without leaving their house before they get suicidal and depressed or whatever
lightweights ive gone years
as long as i have a fat girl im good

>>215431236
ewwwwwwww I rather be a faggot than fuck a fat bitch

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>>215431261
low test fag
fat girls are fantastic neet waifus

>>215431283
I guess when you're as ugly as you are the only thing you can pull is a beached whale

>>215419056
almost there

>>215431106
The problem with being a neet is that you feel stuck. You can't date, get a house, move someplace, travel, you're basically just treading water.

>>215419056
I achieved final form a month ago. I started wearing my hat backwards. FYI (Theres a small percentage of people that this creates seethe in). Changed my life.

>>215431004
>dude, the main character is a slacker, lmao
The plot synopsis doesn't really sell the movie in this case. It is a fun movie though.

>>215432362
>you're basically just treading water.
that's exactly what I want out of life. I don't like change. I realize I'm not like most people but I am just content with wasting time doing nothing.

>>215419182
you always feel better when you see the wage slaves eat their lunches in their cars, go to some overpriced slop restaurant with colleagues or buy their plastic wrapped lunch at the supermarket.
Looking through windows seeing them type on their little keyboards in some soulless program or in their email is the best kek

>>215432448
It's not seething it's cringe

>>215419056
dude is kinda gay for letting some lib raise his seed without his input though

if you're gonna impregnate browns and libs you must keep your offspring under your thumb

>>215432663
Are you muslim?

>>215432687
no, just sentient

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>>215422388
I kek’d at this more than I should’ve. Excellent question.

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>>215419056
tfw you'll never be able to afford to be sucked off by Bunny

>>215431106
I haven't met a single NEET that wasn't massively depressed or massively retarded (unless they were rich)

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>>215433306
it's the same in all walks of life
only the .01% of people have enough soul to escape the gravity of their environment and be based enough to disrespect the talmud and the freemasonic matrix every day. most cave to porn and peer pressure rather than ascend.

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For me it's Waingromaxxing

>>215424905
>I just thought he was being a good friend by going to see the guy's show.
Well, yeah, he was also a good friend.

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I live in England and not sunny California so if I went to the supermarket in my dressing gown and shades people would just ask me to leave or call the police. girls are socially allowed to go to the supermarket in their pyjamas of course because it's le quirky.

I hate working but I hate the shame normies make you feel when you have to talk to them and explain you've essentially dropped out of society. they view you worse than an immigrant or disabled person living off gibs. I think they're brain just can't compute a non-slave mentality.

I work 20h 5 days a week in 4 hour shifts. it's a low skill easy job but it's not enough to live off. renting is just out of reach financially and I don't want to flat share. I also can't stand living with my parents as a grown man. they're filthy and don't clean anything. I'm sort of just stuck in limbo. if I double my hours to full time I can afford to rent but then I'm working all week in which case what's the point of having my own place if I'm just going to sleep there? might as well stop working all together while living at home. there is no incentive to do anything because I'm never going to have kids or afford a house so what's the point?

>>215432475
Dude you're like a fucking Beatles song.

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>>215419056
Yeah, I've shopped in my bathrobe high off my ass plenty of times. I also have pot leaf pajama pants and slippers to go with it.

I am not employed officially and I have no personal expenses at this time. I do maintain a pretty strict drug regimen to keep my mind, you know, limber.

>>215433579
This is pretty much the third world mindset in a single post

>>215433727
>I'm never going to have kids
how is this a third world mindset?

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>>215433727
>double your work hours
>tax rate doubles to pay for new arrivals in hotel rooms
no thank you

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>>215419056
Unfortunately I still have to work, though it's on a rotating system of part-time remote jobs that I can laze through for the most part.
But as for general feeling, pretty much. I go to the store in a shirt old enough to be see-through, ill-fitting shorts, and slippers. And those are pretty much all I have in the way of clothes. Can't remember the last time I wore a pair of jeans. >>215432475 put it better than I ever could. I have no expectations or real aspirations at this point of being happy in this life, so I settle with being content.

>>215422388
he was a trust fund kid
>>215431106
yeh being both, i'd rather be a neet than employed if i had the choice. people act like going without working makes them feel empty inside but working jobs you can't stand and have no aptitude is no better

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>>215419056
I was a lazy arrogant drop out in my early 20s. I put in maximal effort in my mid 20s and got certs. Got into a bunch of management positions in my late 20s and shmoozed. Started getting into middle management in my early 30s. Then realized being lazy and putting out minimal effort is the best option once you have enough experience to do okay. I honestly only put in actually work like maybe for 12 hours of hard stressful work a week. But "work" for 40 hours as a senior technician and consultant bossing around zoomers.

>>215419056
Basically. Except I have two cats, I have a full-time job, I don’t drink, I don’t bowl (though I do love bowling alleys, it’s weird), and all my friends are married, so if I ever want to hang out, their wives have to be involved too, which fucks up the whole dynamic.

>>215419056
except I dont have any friends

>>215419646
thanks for a laugh

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There's no way in hell this neolib torture system we're currently under ever agrees to UBI right?

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>>215431158
gets it.

>>215433518
I haven’t laughed this hard in a long time. Holy fuck. Thanks Anon.

A cool alternative ending where they served in the military together:
>Last scene shows a clean shaven, short haired lebowski dressed in a military outfit while terrible war scenes unfold around him. People scream and get blown apart. Lebowski is crouching, hiding from explosions and bullets and while doing so he is watching walter who has completely lost his mind: screaming uncontrollably, firing his weapon at every direction, clearly in a state of complete mental breakdown.

>>215419056
I use to run 9 miles a day work 50 hours a week and make 250k a year. I was fucking miserable. Now I chill 6 out of 7 days a week. Most days I drink beer do an edible and go for long walks. So much more happier now. The Dude gets it!

I would also live like the dude if I had funds to live like the dude.

>>215435978
>UBI
already exist, its called unemployment

>>215419646
this sounds familiar. a few years back weren't lumberjacks selling some scheme like this? you buy their life insurance, you get a payout if they die
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/LoxHFGmoeus

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>>215436176
No problem anon I got some moves I can make here. Probably be a big help to the board.

The more I try to become the Dude, the more I realize I slowly turned into Walter

>>215431176
but then there's a lot more you need to afford when you work - wasting money on travel to work, clothes, fastfood and shit

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>>215419056
In my 40+ years of lifetime experience, I've learned that people who dress and act laidback are absolutely vicious self-centered pricks when it comes down to the wire. It's camouflage for the worst types of human beings imaginable.

>>215419056
The truth is there is nothing. “You” are nothing and because nothing matters you can become your true self with no inhibitions. That is what The Dude teaches us, we are all dust that has been reprieved of oblivion for but a moment.

>>215432362
all you mention are purchases. you define quality life through consumerism. lol

>>215431106
My dad and I butt heads on this subject every so often. There was a good couple months last year between school and starting my career where I was mostly NEETing and I wish I was back every day. Took a week off and just stayed at home.

>>215419646
Just finished doing this and now I have $250k. Thanks anon.

>>215433518
who would want to emulate that weak coward?

>>215419056
Yes. I have transcended both willpower and self-loathing. I simply exist, content to do the will of God. I am His instrument.

>>215439029
You forgot your lithium.

>>215439046
Medication is a tool of the Adversary.

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>>215439348

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>>215439471
>placing trust and faith in control systems instead of the living, breathing voice of the universe
ngmi

>>215419056
I can't, I don't own a home, only way I could ever see of me being just totally slacker dude mode would be if I got an RV and even then I would still need a part time job to maintain the basic maintenance payments in insurance,fuel and other shit.

this was the most reddit movie I've ever seen after V for vendetta

>>215440009
Reddit is based

>>215438631
This. Laid-back people are buzzed and stoned all the time. They will never show up for anything on time or repay even the smallest loan or favor.

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>>215419056
No I had sex and had a kid , my connection to wizardry has been severed forever

>>215440009
it's pretty shit, never understood the eternal praise it gets. maybe because i actually knew guys like """the dude""" and thought they were degen retards

>>215440989
Metalheads are also buzzed and stoned all the time they're just usually actually nice to be around since most modern "hippies" are trust fund kids or leeches whereas metal bros usually at least work in the trades or something

>>215441163
The dude is kind of asshole though? He's not portrayed as a super reliable dude he's just relatable

>>215419095
I’m a highly-paid slacker employee

>>215431106
Yes, no wife or family growing old alone and looking back at a life wasted.

>>215432448
I do the same. I try to model my life around peak Fred Durst.

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>>215438931
You sound like someone thats to weak to make a move.

>>215435978
I can't see it but please at least vote for it if someone offers

Like the US feds waste colossal amounts of money on social security/medicaid/education, it's not like there aren't tons of forces that constantly grow government expenditures without some billionaire being able to force his pocket politicans to seriously downsize it. But UBI or negative income tax has the problem of being a little libertarian, a little anti-immigration, a little small-government, not anti-white, but also massively "socialist", so it has no political religion behind it.

I think yes. I'm working at european version of costco and i drive forklifts and make minimum wage but i love my job. Telling people where thing they are looking for is etc. I make minimum wage but it is enough for daily alcohol intake (3 7% alcohol 500ml beers) and weekly and 5g 3CMC session. I'm comfortable. Still live my mom but I don't care. I don't want girlfriend or whatever. I had sex and honestly masturbating high on research chemicals is much better. I'm ugly and disgusting and I always worried how they perceive me. When I'm alone there are no schizy's. I will continue my lifestyle. I still don't have driving license and I'm 25.

>>215441848
fpbp

>>215419089
I occasionally dabble in employment but I usually find that the ROI isn’t worth it so I go back to leveraging taxpayer money into my business which is to consume content on my personal computer.

>>215419056
I look like this but I am employed and have an engineering degree. I just don’t like dressing up that much.

>>215422388
Rent makes a man, a man does not make rent.

>>215432448
I started wearing a cowboy hat and boots just because it makes people seethe in my area.

>>215419056
no I still suck at bowling and my brain refuses to enjoy weed but I have a Walter and a Donny

>>215419646
your uncle Bob is going to have a little "accident" within 6 months

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this dude abides.

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>>215419095
>>215419182
>>215419056
what's worse, being broke and unemployed or broke and employed? unironic question

>>215444064
Broke but unemployed gives you more time to fuck sluts.

>>215419056
This is what I wanted when everyone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up.

>>215444064
>broke and employed
This is impossible. If you are employed your money is going toward something and therefore you are not broke. Being broke is not having anything at all

>>215442178
>leveraging taxpayer money into my business which is to consume content on my personal computer.
Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

>>215444500
I think he means living paycheck to paycheck

>>215444676
Yeah if you're in that situation then your life is fucked and I would rather be unemployed and homeless than living like that

>>215438631
>people who dress and act laidback are absolutely vicious self-centered pricks
This is just people in general. The only difference is laidback people have low threshold for keeping up the charade.

>>215419056
I went to my town football game last Friday and there were 18 year old men wearing pajamas with a blanket around their shoulders and Ugg slippers. One of them had a giant cowboy hat on. It wasn't one or two guys. We saw about 20-30 people like that. On

>>215444918
Every time I drive past a highschool at about three oclock, the majority of the teens leaving the school are dressed in Crocs and sweatpants.

>>215430947
>It's about this guy whose just hanging around, he doesn't do anything except bowling and he gets mistaken for this millionaire with the same name, that's why the film is called that, and he gets caught up in all this kidnapping and extortion. He just kind of drifts through everything, John Goodman is very good in it, his character is based on John Milius and he's a pompous psycho. It's a really great film about 90s LA, just weirdoes living aimless lives.
There

>>215432448
I started doing this around 26 years ago just before my thrash/hip hop ensemble got really big. Suppose it tapped into the 'redneck' zeitgeist and attracted a load of shitheads but really I'm quite a sensitive guy. Anyway, guess I better get 'Rolling'

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>>215445723
Fred pls
Why'd you feed Sam to the bear, Fred
Why'd you do it