Sword & sorcery bros, we're swordfightin' and spellcastin' good this month!
>>216017530I like that they intentionally made the swords look shitty to keep in line with previous entries. Like, there's competent people who can make plausible historical-looking swords. And the Deathstaker crew said, "no thanks"Gotta respect that.
>>216017578I liked how the character was almost drooling and being like "that's the perfect sword" and then it was kinda just shitty lol
>>216017887Just shitty? It's fucking terrible! And it's supposed to be a legendary magic weapon but in the climax Deathstalker just grabbed one of the four blades and dismantled it with his bare hands. It was amazing.
>>216017530>A deathstalker movie without softcore boob models. Why even bother?
>>216018131well ok 4 shitty swords in one. great stuff but maybe a touch too silly sword. granted the design does make sense plot wise
>>216017530>patton oswaltyou are not going to sell anything that way
>>216018375What's with the hate for Patton Oswalt?
>>216018375he only does voice for the midget goblin thing
>>216017530Red Sonja was better.
>Patton Oswalt
>>216018478I liked both. Dunno if one was better than other.
>>216017550The only good one
>>216018540Deathstalker has better artistry, but the story is so devoid of conflict, or even interaction, it's rough to sit through.
>>216018390He murdered his own wife.>>216018430How fitting.
This is a Deathstalker thread.No one under 50 cares about who or what Patton Oswald is. Shut the fuck up, fatties.
>>216017530Why did they cast a 75 year old Arabic man to play a 30 year old white heroLook at that hair mismatch
>>216018131I wish he had launched the blades, like in that Albert Pyun movie with the 3 bladed sword. https://youtu.be/vDvuBY97cD4?si=8hIQDSv5GSyMPrxA
>>216018750>a 75 year old Arabic manHe's Swiss.
>>216018740Patton Oswalt is a mediocre comedian who hasn't been on tv in over a decade but is mildly notable for having the most unbelievable story about not knowing his wife was on heroin and she OD'd in their bed.
>>216017530Bad attempts at comedy aside (this is a hallmark for this director) it's genuinely good. I was expecting the worst and was happily surprised.There's no woke shit and the main female character is cute and likable.
>>216018750>white heroYou can't seriously be referring to Deathstalker as some bastion of "white culture" to defend in bullshit culture war nonsense.
>>216018848>Bad attempts at comedy aside>asideNigga, have you ever saw a fucking Deathstalker movie? It's a feature, not a bug
>>216017550>peak Monique GabrielleOnly Deathstalker worth watching tbf (to be frank).
>>216018687No he didn't. He's been outspoken about your maga daddy and you made that up as a coping mechanism, like the delicate little bitch you are.
>>216019438Just to be clear his version of events is his wife was heavily into drugs and he never noticed or cared enough to do anything about it.
>>216017530I will only watch it if RLM review it and say it is good. Right now its sounds like pure nostalgia shit.
>>216019415this. deathstalker franchise is all over the place tonally but the low budget Fun Allowed movies i still rewatch
>>216019487They liked Deadliest Prey, and that's basically the same movie as the original.
>>216019487It's weird nostalgia because it doesn't reference or bring back anything from a prior movie, other than Deathstalker himself and the theme song. Nostalgia bait usually has more Easter eggs and nods and memberberries.
>>216019776It's nostalgic about that whole subgenre of Sword & Sorcery slop productions, not one single movie in particular.
>>216020118That's like saying any new western or science fiction movies that come out are nostalgia bait.
>>216020660No. Dumb.
Any actual good sword and sorcery films to watch, besides Conan? I knew of one I wanted to see but I forgot the name
>>216020790LegendKrullSolomon Kanenew Red Sonja
>>216020717Retard.
>>216020914Yes, you.
>>216018800Blatant lies. he was in agents of shield just before the pandemic
I watched Barbarian Queen for the first time recently Had no clue the main character got raped and then killed the guy with her vagina
>>216020936Im not the one who posted "nostalgiabait for a subgenre"
I can't watch anything with Patton Oswalt.
>>216021073You're dumb as shit. Either haven't seen Kostanski's Deathstalker or know nothing about S&S flicks. Now hop off my dick before I break you.
>>216020833I just learned there exists a Tom Cruise / Ridley Scott Sword and Sorcery film. Wow
Would have been better if it had kept that dark tone it had for the first 30 seconds.
>>216020833>new Red Sonja
>>216022627Your wimpishly implied machismo is not going to change my opinion.
