Yes, yes, well done Slytherin, well done Slytherin. HOWEVER*pulls out a gun and shoots Draco Malfoy*
>>216504201
>>216504201>"FEAR NOT GRYFFINDORS" Dumbledore quietly bellowed>"YOU WILL BE SPARED">"I ONLY DESIRE THE BLOOD OF PROBLEMATIC WIZARDS"
I am stretching the legs of this thread
>>216505783I'll mark the envelope
He bellowed silently
snogging ching chong
>>216504201Guns are illegal in Bongistan, Dumbledorf would be in prison for even owning one.
>>216504201 >The dining hall of Hogwarts went to a majestic green and silver, proud banners streamed from the tops of the cloudy roof as Dumbledore rose from high seat to address the students.>"YES YES WELL DONE SYLTHERIN, HOWEVER" Dumbledore said calmly>The hall was dead silent. Slytherin House waited anxiously>"However nothing, haha!" Dumbledore ejaculated jovially. "Slytherin has won! You are the rightful winners of this year's House Cup. Well done.">"Draco Malfoy, come forward to accept your house's most deserved reward!" Slytherin House cheered as their champion Draco stretched his legs to claim their prize, his face beaming, his chiseled chin held high and haughty.
>>216505808>"PETRIFICUS TOTALUS!!!" Dumbledore paralyzed Malfoy with his hard, solid wand just as he stood before him>"COLLOPORTUS!" Dumbledore shot into the air with a roaring boom. locking all the doors in the hall. >With Malfoy's stiffened body propped up against the podium, Dumbledore turned around, dropped his trousers, and revealed the most forbidden forest, white, grey, and speckled with brown. And from it, he unleashed a furious torrent of diarrhrea. >BRAAP>The entire hall gasped in horror as Dumbledore's steaming greenish stink splattered across Malfoy's face. All the poor boy could do was take it. >BRAAP>"AHAHAHAHAHA! WELL DONE SLYTHERIN, OH YES SYLTHERIN EXCELLENT INDEED! HEHEHEHE!" Gandolf bellowed insanely as his brown bowel brew blasted forth from his prolapsed butthole. >"BRAAP">The Professors threw their heads back in hysterical laughter. There was no question that they were having the time of their lives, watching as Dumbledore's putrid poop potion plastered Malfoy's prissy pretty boy face. >BRAAP>The students were in chaos. Slytherin House was absolutely humiliated as their Headmaster's cankerous colon concoction encrusted Malfoy's face, his clothes, and the floor, spreading through the entire hall. >Eventually Dumbledore's fecal fountain floundered. He pulled up his trousers, angrily screaming calmly "DID YOU SLYTHERIN SCUM SINCERELY SURMISE THAT I WOULD LET YOU WIN ANYTHING?! YOU ARE SATAN'S CHILDREN! YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR ALL THE WARS IN HISTORY! YOUR CRUCIFIED OUR LORD AND SAVIOR, JESUS CHRIST!">The entire hall erupted into applause at Dumbledore's righteous rebuke of the demonic Slytherin kikes. The end.
>DRACO MALFOY DID YOU THINK YOU WERE THE MAIN CHARACTER YOU LITTLE SHIT>he transitioned calmly >I HAD YOUR DAD LICKING MY WIZDUSSY WHEN HE WAS A TEEN AND NOW YOULL BE DOING IT ALSO>TRY TO BULLY MY PERFECT LITTLE GROOMED HARRY AGAIN YOU LITTLE SHIT AND I'LL SHOW YOU SOMETHING HARD AS A STONE
>>216504201I want to shoot my meat gun at Hermione if you know what I mean...
>>216505822>Gandolf
>>216505822>Dumbledore turned around, dropped his trousers, and revealed the most forbidden forest, white, grey, and speckled with browngoddamn you kek
>>216505910>>first year at Hogwarts>>witness that mudblood Hermione slapping my fellow Slytherin house member Draco>>assemble my friends and tell them my plan of revenge>somehourslater.scroll>>we stretch our legs in pursuit of Hermione>>Hermione gets among her fellow house members outside>>we're hiding in the distance behind some bushes so they can't see us>itstimetostrike.howler>>drop out pants and with loud grunts we give birth to massive poops>>we've been saving our poops for days>>we complements eachother's poops before I aim my wand on mine>>'TELEPORTUS'>>we watch with glee as Hermione's face changes>>she drops her pants as fast as lightning and crouches>>her friends doesn't bat an eye as it's still practiced to defecate & evaporate>>she's certainly pushing hard to get it out>>just as Hermione let it go we teleport in another poop>>we hear Hermione grunting loudly>>her friends starts paying attention to her>>she's clearly struggling as she's not used to pass poops of this magnitude and frequency>>'TELEPORTUS!' >>Hermione drops on all four with sweat forming on her forehead>>we teleport the poops with such rapidness giving her no time to gather her thoughts>>her friends' faces are mixed with confusion and disgust>>we laugh as our revenge is done>>Snape catches us>ohshit.portrait>1/2
>>216506357>he looks over at Hermione, her violated asshole next to a pile of excrement>he drops his pants and shits>he then casts engorgeo on it>now it's easily twice as big as ours, both in girth and length>a quick glance and you could have mistaken it for a basilisk>he looks at us and tells us to watch this closely>he takes out his wand>'TELEPORTUS!'>Hermione stiffens up>her stomach actually bulges to even manage to store this inhumane poop>actually felt sorry for her for a moment>we watch as Hermione builds up strength to begin to pass this colossus>pretty much everyone has left her by this point>Hermione's legs and arms are trembling beneath her>she's definitely having the struggle of a lifetime>with each loud groan we see the crap move out an inch>it doesn't even break off>'I should cut back on the fiber' Snape says>several intense minutes later it appears as if it's levitating out of Hermione's stretched anus>it's that solid>Hermione's shaking immensely now>with a last push it falls to the ground>so does Hermione out of exhaustion>'my job here is done' Snape says before stretching his legs to his hut>we can't help but stare at Hermione's ravaged arse>moments later we hear Dumbledore shout '500 points to Gryffindor' from a nearby window>2/2
>>216504201>yes, yes, well done, Slytherin, well done Slytherine. HOWEVER>voldemort arrested me mum, tried to starve me mum to death, did starve me grand mum to death, sent me great aunt to the flu network, sent me great grandfather to the wizangamot high council>it may all be a big joke to you but voldemort is a really fucking monster>therefore FIVE HUNDRED POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR
>>216506357>>216506375Is this poop fetish posting?
>>216506357>>216506375Too far, just lame. Although>moments later we hear Dumbledore shout '500 points to Gryffindor' from a nearby windowwas good.
