>Turmoil has engulfed the Galactic Republic. The taxation of trade routes to outlying star systems is in dispute.>*yawn*>Hoping to resolve the matter with a blockade of deadly battleships, the greedy Trade Federation has stopped all shipping to the small plan.....small planet of....>.....zzzzzzzzzzzz.......>zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz........
What is worse? Having 90 iq or just pretending?
>>216948129too complicated for muttmericans, I know
>scene 1>we must debate the taxation of trade routes>scene 2>OOOOOOOOOHHH NOOOOOOOOOO ANI MEESA STEP IN POOPOO>scene 3>the democracy of our republic is in jeopardy
>>216948129>>Turmoil has engulfed the Galactic Republic.Interesting.>The taxation of trade routes to outlying star systems is in dispute.I see. Tell me more.>Hoping to resolve the matter with a blockade of deadly battleships, the greedy Trade Federation has stopped all shipping to the small planet of Naboo.Now you've really got my attention. This opening crawl alone is worth the price of admission.
>>216948200just pretending apparently
>>216948295
>>216948129MEESASTEPIN THEDOODOO
>>216948129>Turmoil has engulfed my ass! I'm on my knees gettin' fucked hard! EEEEYYYYUUURRRRRGGGHHHHH shoot a frothy load!
>>216948295Die in a fire prequeltranny
Nope, they were evil
>>216948129This movie has flaws, but it's not the political aspect. That part was cool and makes it feel more like a period piece of some kind. This and Attack both had great potential and could have been completely fixed by changing a few things. Revenge, not so much.
>>216949262It's the Revenge of the Sith gigachads who are the real problem and are why I'm reluctant to be a "prequel defender." I don't want to be affiliated with those golden retriever-brained morons.
>>216948203>thirdies swallow up garbage made by an american and can still muster up the courage to look down on themcosmic irony
>>216948203An American literally wrote this movie.
>>216949404One American, not millions of them.
>>216949377Revenge of the Sith feels more like a Bollywood movie than any of the other five films. Funny that the people who love that one are, I mean, the way they are.
>>216948129While prequeltards think that having this shit written in the title crawl excuses the political plot points in the movie they completely ignore how fucking stupid all of the political strife is presented.>Oh shit guys our Trade Routes are being taxed! What should we do to get these taxes removed?>We could just up our prices. We are a monopoly and the galaxy has no other choice in the republic to use for Trade. If they can't pay let's have them bitch to their representatives to get the taxes removed.>We could use our influence in the senate to just overturn the taxes. Like we literally have the chancellor in our pocket.>WAIT I KNOW! You know that one grass planet that doesn't actually require our services in any capacity and is of literally no consequence to the greater galactic community? Let's use all of our resources to blockade it! Surely that will make other planets think we're the victim and will get the taxes removed!>Nute that idea is fucking stupid, where did you come up with such a retarded plan?>This really sketchy dude in a black robe said it would work>Well fuck I guess we should try it out then.
Phantom Menace is my favorite Star Wars movie.
>>216949404Millions of Americans and Europeans alike went to see it, and the two movies that came after it. They did so because it is a great motion picture, made by a great American named George Lucas.Europeans are simply incapable of creating something as grand and culturally relevant as Star Wars, so I can see why you feel inferior and compensate by lashing out at the United States, unprompted, in a Star Wars thread.
>>216949281Hey the Separatist’s had heaps of hero’s like General Grievous, Durge, Whorm Lothsome and the much beloved Admiral I’Arape The’A Twi’lek’Whores
>>216949281>star wars fans unironically insist that the cis was morally grey and had heroes in it and the empire was completely pitch black evil with no good people whatsoever because of muh title crawl>>216949477Yeah, ironically RLM's criticism that the political stuff is boring and will go over the heads of kids is wrong but for the opposite reason. TPM's politics are handled exactly how a 6 year old would think politics work.
>>216949281if the separatists had won the empire would have never existed. some separatists even became part of the rebel alliance after the war.
>>216949281I dont know why people think this is a stupid thing to say. Im sure there were a lot of iron cross recipients in Nazi Germany that performed heroic acts and saved the lives of their fellow soldiers. Acts that would make them heroes in their home country. Just because they're the "bad guys" doesn't make a heroic deed any less heroic.
>>216949281Lucas was clearly referencing the fact that characters like Dooku and Jango Fett are referred to as "Heroes" when you play Star Wars Battlefront. But it was weird for audiences because the game was still being made and Lucas was the only one who knew that when he wrote this.We're talking about a man with profound autism who is completely incapable of imagining what other people are thinking. It's why he's so bad at writing dialogue. Case in point, the romantic subplot between Anakin and Padme. Its seriously as if he's an alien that doesn't know how human beings actually interact with one another and he's never had a conversation in his entire life. In a way, it's miraculous.
>>216949477>Like we literally have the chancellor in our pocket.Once again low IQ faggots criticize these films without understanding them. The trade federation had no idea about the Chancellor.You cannot claim this film is made for babies while at the same time getting multiple facts wrong. You are exactly the type who just wants dangling keys in the form of lightsabers and AT-ATs. You're a retard.
>>216949281>hero>a person who is admired for their courage, outstanding achievements, or noble qualitiesRLMfags once again exposing their illiteracy.
>>216951457>Retard acts like he knows better when the film literally shows beurecrats controlled by the TF whisper to Valorum and immediately get the Chancellor to call for an independent investigation rather than send immediate aid to Naboo.Oh I'm sorry what was that about not paying attention? Oh I guess the fact the crawl mentions Valorum sending the Jedi makes this a major plothole doesn't it? Thanks for playing retard. Try out nerding someone with more of a life than me.
>>216949477In the original draft Naboo (or Aquilla or whatever the original name for it was) had some kind of special chrome or something that was really valuable for making star wars' tech and all the trade dispute shit was basically just an excuse for the Trade federation to take them over so they could steal it.
>>216951551>dude they whispered in a guys ear, this changes everything!Yeah, no. They don't know about the chancellor, and this is backed up by multiple events, which you would have caught if you were paying attention.
>>216951644Name them fag. What source from the film shows that the TF do not have sway on the Chancellor and the senate as a whole because the narrative implication is that Valorum is in the pockets of multiple corporations or at the very least is at the behest of bureaucrats that are.
>>216951547>evil>noble
>>216951710>orYou tried
yeah nobody's ever gotten really into the details of a setting like Middle-earth or Star Trek, caring about the different factions and that. if they made some sort of 'game' dedicated to fictional factions, wars, even tax policies, kids would NEVER play it!
>>216949477you're implying that gunboat diplomacy wasn't their absolute last option or doesn't have precedence of working in that universe.and for a real world example, the us is currently doing a naval blockade of venezuela.
>>216948129I fell asleep just reading this. Best nap I've had in ages. Thanks, Op!
>>216948129it wasn't supposed to be a documentary.
It made the Star Wars universe more real that it wasn’t always about evil emperors and death planet rays and that they worried about mundane shit before the special shit hit the fan. Even as a kid I appreciated this
>>216948129Watch the Mr. Plinkett reviews.
>>216953747I like that the Sith became businessmen and Politicans in order to infiltrate and conquer the republic from within, rather than brute force their way in like they did thousands of years prior.
>>216949960>if the separatists had won the empire would have never existedIf the Separatists had won the Empire would exist under another name. Both sides were run by the same guy for one purpose, establishing his Empire.
>>216948129Everybody expected this to be hot shit.But instead, it was a cold turd on a paper plate.
>>216953005With evil shadowy figures telling a blundering oaf politician what to do. Lucas is an oracle with how well he predicted it!
>>216948129>>.....zzzzzzzzzzzz.......>>zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz........More happens in an episode 1 of Star Wars than season 1 of Pluribus.
How do you tax trade routes in space? Do they have toll booths or something? Just fly over them, dumbass.
>>216949477Star Wars characters were idiots. Greedo is an idiot but he's never painted as bad, he's just that stupid bounty hunter. The problem with the prequel stems from making everyone Greedo making him seem smarter
>>216948261
>>216953971Because ultimately the space ships have to make port somewhere and go through the rigorous process of customs and excise when they land.
>>216950295Nah, Lucas was injecting his libertarian beliefs. They all love Ayn Rand listening to Rage Against the Machine. He wasn't unfiltered schizo like Ditko
>>216948129It’s like a Star Wars movie, except without the studio giving control to all the many, many more experienced people that took Lucas‘s concept and made it work as a movie. Also lacking is a Steven Spielberg to eliminate Lucas’ absurd, boring, silly, contrived, cartoonish ideas in the first meeting. And instead of relegated Lucas to a spectator grunting monosyllabic utterances from the sidelines about how much he hates directing and doesnt want to do it, he now has full creative control over the script, design & direction. Aaaaand the movie is total fucking garbage, the turning point in a three generations that would give up on movies & theaters after their favorite IP would be sold back to them in adulthood so poorly done it even ruined their memories of the originals.BUT THE ZOOMERS LIKED IT WHEN THEY WERE 3 THOUGH AND THEY NEVER LEARNED MEDIA LITERACY ANY BETTER IN THEIR WHOLE LIVES.
>>216949477And what was the Jedi Order's plan to suppress the information on the HoloNet spreading of the Republic's plot to seize all planets in the Galaxy and dictate how trade & commerce would be regulated? Surely the Jedi were responsible enough to tell everyone that the Republic monopolized trade for everyone's good. BUT IT WASN'T. We know that's how we got into this mess with a bunch of greedy senators fucking people over on every planet and criminal syndicates everywhere paying tribute to the Black Sun. THE ONLY PERSON RESPONSIBLE ENOUGH TO SEE THIS AS A PROBLEM WAS A JEWISH WOMAN. THE JEDI WERE TELLING PEOPLE EVERYTHING IS FINE. While the Chancellors were taking bribes from alien pirates the whole time.
>>216948261I maintain that if Jar Jar was cut completely and the plot was otherwise completely unchanged, TPM would have been much better received.
