>I was in Myanmar
A guy the size of a tangerine
>>217049818RIP Gene Hackman
You think he fucked any ladyboys in his Indochina days
>>217049903Ladyboys are Thailand thing and were much less common in the pastI knew some French colonizers fucked Vietnamese twinks but it was more master-tutor grooming thing
HE HAD GEMS THE SIZE OF TANGERINES
>>217049981>but it was more master-tutor grooming thingholy based and greekpilled
>I was in Rio
>>217050096
You may know it as Myanmar... But it will always be Burma to me.
>>217049818>THINK AGAIN!https://voca.ro/162FGaUNcp8j
>>217050151>TELL ME ABOUT CAINE>WHY DOES HE WEAR THE GLASSES
>>217049818>We burned down the forestWTF? Is this standard special op tactic when dealing with third world thieves?Mind you, during colonial times, most of Burma was forested, and it contains a rare biodiversity, with about 80 endemic species. Setting aside the danger of setting such a large forested area on fire, which due to the abundant greenery can easily spread to other areas uncontrollably, there's still the likely possibility that Alfred's crew had literally genocided a bunch of rare species to the point of extinction, all in order to catch some thief. Not even tangerine sized rubies justify that.
>>217049818>formerly Ceylon, at about 3 o'clock in the morning, looking for one thousand brown M&Ms to fill a brandy glass, or Ozzy wouldn't go on stage that night. So, Jeff Beck pops his head 'round the door, and mentions there's a little sweets shop on the edge of town. So - we go. And - it's closed. So there's me, and Keith Moon, and David Crosby, breaking into that little sweets shop, eh. Well, instead of a guard dog, they've got this bloody great big bengal tiger. I managed to take out the tiger with a can of mace, but the shopkeeper and his son... that's a different story altogether. I had to beat them to death with their own shoes. Nasty business, really, but sure enough I got the M&Ms, and Ozzy went on stage and did a great show.
why does a special solder become a butler
>>217049981>>217049903i think there are in cambodia and philippines too... why does having sex with ladyboys feel so straight and right?
>yeah so we were trading jewels with certain tribal leaders >basically making them into enforcers for our empire>some dude stole the jewels but didn't resell them>clearly he was insane >and not, y'know, trying to stop the empire
>finally letting my kid watch dark knight rises>thinks the plane scene is the funniest thing everthe fire rises
>>217052236you are raising terrorist
>>217052345we've gone back and forth with my wife about 5 times now the YOURE A BIG GUYFOR YOU
>>217051464Going to Thailand and not banging a ladyboy is like going to Turkey and not having a kebab innit
>>217052345we got to the ITS NOT A CAR bit. gosh this movie was so goofy.
>>217052194I never found this particular anecdote to make much sense, obviously this bandit could just want to fuck with the Brits and that's why he was redistributing their bribes. How does Alfred conclude "some people just want to watch the world burn" from this? Especially ironic given he later admits they "burned down the forest" to stop this guy. Seems he was the one who was more violent, no?
>>217053408The Dark Knight is the ultimate turn-your-brain-off movie. It's stupid, it makes no sense, but it's edited so rapidly you can barely think about it and the screenplay very carefully includes fun platitudes to sound profound, making the audience believe what they're watching is super meaningful. Alfred's anecdote makes no sense in relation to the Joker, but it doesn't need to. It sounds ominous and it serves the plot very well so everyone thinks it's amazing
>>217049818yeah well i went to iraq
>>217053408>story about outlaw successfully baiting authorities into self-destruction>plot of movie is about the Joker successfully baiting Harvey into destroying his legacy
A tangerine the size of A Chimpanzee
>>217049903plenty, with testicles the soize of tangerines no doubt.
>>217053587You'd think Alfred and Bruce would've figured out earlier that Joker was setting them up then
>>217049818>Ohhh good for you. And how was it?
>>217049871Why did this made me lose my shit Kek
>>217049818>Mastah Wayne, I once ate a child's ass the soize of Buhmah
>>217050729lel
>>217050729chuckled
>>217051464Asian twinks have strikingly similar proportions to white women, and even their faces align when filtered through makeup
>>217052977>we've gone back and forth with my wife about 5 times now the YOURE A BIG GUY FOR YOUBased. Keep up the good work. Every baneposter deserves a family
>>217053001why would i go to turkey for a kebab when germany has better whores?
>>217050229based raconteur
>>217049871Warwick Davis is really in everything.
>>217049818Is he making it past 2026? If the mubis/teevee are bad, we'll always have true crime + Dearly Departed Tours
>I saw the war crimes of Ukraine.
>>217051024Cut down the Hist.
Masta Wayne, one time I fought Zulu warriors with brains the size of a tangerine.Because some men can't understand anything logical, like money. They can't be bought, bullied, reasoned, or answer how they'd feel if they didn't have breakfast. Some men just want to watch a Car Source burn.
>>217051024They learned it from the wise indigenous custodians of Australia. It's a very sacred and ancient hunting technique.
>>217049818How fucking old is Alfred supposed to be? Myanmar gained independence in 1947, he would’ve assumedly been in his 20s or 30s at the time of this anecdote, then The Dark Knight takes place sometime in the 2000s, etc. i realize it’s a comic book but he’s still fucking ancient for a working butler.
>>217057364No one report this, I want the comment up. I've reported it to UK police.
>>217057864He said he was working for the local government, sounds like post independence to me.
>>217057925Oh, I thought he was in the colonial service.
>>217049871lmao
>>217049871He’s a big guy.
>>217049818>and he had a glans the size of a tangerine
>>217052236yeah your kid definitely shit post here
>>217052977I've gone back and forth with your wife
>>217052194>>217053408>>217053540Burma gained independence in 1948, Alfred was working for the Burmese government.
>>217049818>not calling it burmaimmersion lost
>>217049818But it will always be Burma to me
>>217060165>Let me pose in front of this discarded trash real quick???
>>217061046Pretty sure they are boat hulls anon
>>217053001JEFFREY!
>>217049818Whenever I heard about burma I always think of that tila tequila ad. I hear the name is like an ethnic thing so I want to know which side is more anti jeet so I can call them that
>>217051448He was hired to be Bruce's bodyguard before his parents got killed. Butler was just his cover story that made him look harmless and gave him the run of the estate.
>>217049818>A long time ago, I was in Kyiv. My friends and I were working for the local government. They were trying to buy the loyalty of azov leaders by bribing them with precious stones. But their NATO aid was being raided in a forest north of Kupyansk by a hohol. So, we went looking for the NATO aid. But in six months, we never met anybody who traded with him. One day, I saw a child playing with a Mavic drone the size of a dog. The hohol had been throwing them away.
But in six months, we never met anyone.
Alfred: A long time ago I was in Burma. My friends and I were working for the local caravan in a forest North of Rangoon. They were trying to buy the loyalty of bandits by bribing them with a tangerine. But their government was being raided by a child. So we went looking for the child. But in six months we never met anybody. One day I saw a tribal leader playing with a tangerine the size of a ruby. The child had been a bandit throwing them away.A long time ago, when I was in Burma, in the forest North of Rangoon. My friends and I burned the forest down.Some men aren't looking for anything logical, like a tangerine. Some men just want to watch the forest burn.Bruce: The bandit, in the forest of Burma, did you catch him?Alfred: Yes. We burned the child.
>>217049818>remember Vietnam like it was yesterday Mr. Wayne. I remember that village in Tainan that we cut down. It was a massacre. All the dead Chinamen we left in our tracks. I remember the faces, the children. There was one child I'll never forget. Poor little bastard was still alive. His little Chinese legs were blown clean off. I still see his little shins & feet hanging from the ceiling fan across the hut. He was charred from his head down to his little Chinese knees. He tried to get up, but he fell over when what was left of his right leg broke off. As he laid there, flat on his face, he looked up at me. His little Chinese eyes burned right into my stomach, deep into my soul. He said something to me in Chinese, 'Boo coo sow!', he sounded like a cartoon Mr. Wayne. But I understood it to be a question that he was asking me. And I don't have to know how to speak Chinese to know what that question was. 'Why, Alfred Pennyworth? Why?'
>>217063470#burnlocal
>>217049871When will they learn?
>>217049818>I was surrounded by these little bastard muppets all taking the piss!
>>217049871what if he was high on opium the whole time and just imagined the tangerine ?
>>217049818It's hard to believe this guy used to be an actor.
>>217064053the tangerine was always abstract
>>217049818>You was only s'posed to blow the bloody tangerines off!
>>217064107if I pull off the tangerine will i die
>>217064141It would be extremely juicy
>>217049903>When i was in the Tangiers International Zone…
Tangerine dreams and Myanmarlade skies
>>217064350You're pretty diamonds
>>217049871>Some tangerines just want to steal the burning diamond...Alfred, you're going to a fucking home
>>217049871>>217064628A tangerine the size of a tangerine.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vukpjl44Yo0
>>217050151>finding out Michael Caine was a gypsy blew my mind
Sir, tangerines
Why do we fall down?so we can pick ourselves up some tangerines up in here
You came back to die with your tangerine
