What is the most creative way to take advantage of a genie, other than asking for an infinite number of wishes?
Have a little more BAKLAVAAAAAA
>>217164830>I wish you had to grant wishes without adding ironic consequences to the outcomes
I'd use my first wish to create a Groundhog Day scenario where I meet the genie for the first time (from his point of view) over and over and I can experiment with all sorts of wishes without having to wish for infinite wishes.At some point I will wish the Genie becomes my alimentary canal so that my mouth is his anus and my anus is his mouth. So he would spend most of the day having cakes and steaks shoved up his ass and at the end of the day he'd have to vomit my shit out into a toilet. I would deliberately choose a horrible toilet.
>>217164830Ask it to successfully divide by zero and then ask for an infinite number of wishes
>>217164830Rape him
>>217164830>I wish I had the power to freely freeze and rewind time There, you can do virtually anything now
>>217164830Depends on if it's a nice genie or a traditional genie that'll purposefully mess with your wishes.
Ask him to suck your dick lol
>>217164830“My first wish is for you to have no rules or limitations.”
>>217164830“I wish for you to train Jasmine to be a sex slave. My second wish is for you to add some OC characters who look nothing like Aladdin characters.”
>I wish for infinite genie lamps>Make all genies know that I have infinite lamps and if they don't fuck with my wishes they'll get released on the third wish
>>217164830>I wish that you must grant the spirit of my wishes and not the letter of my wishes.
>>217164830https://youtube.com/shorts/qL1xAKXZ8Fw?si=eu8Zv80ikt2Lhfih
>>217166222Do you really want that many genies running around free and unbound? Maybe genies are bound for a reason
Just wish for a hueg cawk And infinite money, and selective immortality, everything else is immaterial
>>217164830jailbreak it like a llm then make it say nigger
>>217164830>I wish Apu to be a genie>Use apu as a genie to wish Genie free>Wish Genie to be turned back into a genie>still have 1 wish to do whatever with Apu as a genie>Use genie to wish Apu back to a monkey>Wish Apu to be a genie again>still have 1 wish on Genie to do whatever>repeat as neededYou don't need to ask for infinite wishes, you just need to do this.
>erase me from existence
>>217166317I don't care and if one of them steps over the line I'll just wish him to be chained up againI'll just make a truce, if you are free just don't fuck with meTake russia, china or the usa, just leave everything else to meGo live in russia china or usa and do whatever with your freedomAlaska is a neutral zone, I'll like to visit there sometimes, they say it's niceOnce like, the first genies get their freedom, they'll fall in line and agree, I can see it
>>217164830Wish for more genies
>Wish I was a little bit taller.>Wish I was a baller. >Wish I had a girl who looked good, I would call her.
>>217166375If it's a dickhead genie that fucks your wishes up, how would you actually get a huge cock that is fully functional and attached to you and not a gay boyfriend or giant chicken?
>>217166520Wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat and a 6-4 impala
>>217166375>wish for huge dick>genie gives you a stallion sized human penis >can never wear pants again>can’t get hard because your heart can’t pump enough blood to the dick
what kind of greedy mfers are you that 3 wishes isnt good enough? disgusting
>>217166567>wish for 10 inch dick>get Warwick Davis
>>217164830i wish hitler won genie!
>>217166667lol
>>217166682>it's the nambian hilter
I want to rule the world. No one can betray me or harm me; otherwise, it will backfire on them. Every country would function normally, but I would have a say in every aspect, and my voice would have to be heard. I want to be the most knowledgeable person in all areas that count for a great leader, such as economics, history, geography, sociology and philosophy. Finally, I want a Death Note-esque power that allows me to kill anyone I choose.
They're going to fuck you over, that's what they do in folklore. That's their whole schitck. The only way to win is not to play.
>>217164830>What is the most creative way to take advantage of a genie, other than asking for an infinite number of wishes?I wish for Genie to convert to Christianity.
>>217164830Is it really so hard/detrimental to just be specific and clear?>I wish to have one billion us dollars without arising suspicion>I wish to earn enough money to live comfortably and independently from [doing something I love doing]
>>217165236If we're monkey-pawing then this wish doesn't say anything about control. There's nothing that would denote that you had the ability to change the past. You'd just be able to go back and re-experience the same events over and over again.
>>217167104>I wish to have one billion us dollars without arising suspicionso the genie takes that money from the people you care about and it gives it to you, they're all destitute, your father kills himself because his retirement savings are all gone
>>217166567>wish for immortality>get the shitty kind where you basically are a normal dude but can’t die no matter how much you want to
>Aladdin asks to become a prince>all the Genie does is to throw a parade to trick the Sultan into believing he's a Prince. All his entourage is never seen again so it presumably never existed and was just illusio magicThis Genie is a fucking fraud.
>>217164830What is stopping me from wishing for another genie but as a waifu?
>>217164830Ask for another genie
>>217165676>Wow, thanks. Bye.
>>217167159>1 billion dollars>from the people you care aboutlmao you're either a boomer with no concept of average wealth, or a zoomer with no concept of average wealthTrust me. A billy could easily provide an amazing life for everyone I care about with several hundred million left over.
>>217167209That’s actually how Genies are supposed to work in folklore. Their power is mostly used to persuade.
>>217164879This
Genies exist to exploit the unintended consequences of actions and the ambiguity of language. There is no perfectly worded wish to bamboozle them.
>>217164879If you wished for there to be no ironic consequences, it means you expect there to be consequences, which makes those consequences no longer ironic.Thus freeing the genie to fuck you over at will and still follow your wish.
>>217167297I wish for this anon to get gaped by a thousand clowns. In a row.
>>217167389afterwards the gape-hungry clowns turn on you because gaping is in their nature and you have summoned them
>>217167389Genie interprets “this anon” to be referring to yourself and now you are being raped.
>>217167237
>>217164830>I wish to be God.
>>217167870yeah nothing could go wrong with that wish, surely it will only be positive
>>217167881Correct.
>>217167898ok you don't exist now
>>217167922yeah ok you dickhead
>>217167297i wish for the genie to fulfill the spirit of my wish
>>217166317They nerfed genie to barely more than a shapeshifter once he was freed
>>217164830turn it into a female joi pornbot
>>217167239He didn’t say it would be taken ONLY from the people you care about, just that they would be destitute as well.
>>217167971Done, the genie fulfills the spirit of your wish to fulfill the spirit of your wish. You have 2 wishes remaining.
>>217164830On a basic level, making sure al of your 3 wishes unconditionally require you. (and your consent etc gay crapIf you can't figure out where the second layer of the wishegg starts, you don't deserve to puncture it.
>>217164830Ask for the power to grant your own wishes
>>217168090You aren't in control of how your wishes are interpreted. The genie is. You won't ever outsmart it. If you haven't figured that out, you are a retard.
>>217164830First wish: wish for the Genie to interpret my wishes in my intended way and not to pull any trickery, including this wish.Second wish: wish to be able to return to the current point in time just before making any of my wishes at will, or if I die/am incapacitated in any way.Third wish: wish for reality warping powers/the ability to make anything I can dream of real (it will require a very specific trigger that I will never do on accident).
>>217168088you misunderstood me, my point was that i would say "i wish you to fulfill the spirit of the following: MY_WISH" and instead of MY_WISH i would say whatever my wish is. i would do that with all 3 wishes
>>217166522You mean if you get the genie from Wishmaster that will rules lawyer any wish into screwing you over? I'd start with I wish you weren't a jew.
>>217168117So it turns you into a genie, and now you have the power to grant your wishes but are bound by your nature to only grant them for other people.You people are fucking dumb.
Jafar made the correct wish, to be the most powerful sorcerer in the world. He had reality manipulation powers, he was for all practical effects invincible. I would ask that. The second wish is to nobody be ever able to remove or wish my powers away, the third wish would be to free the genie. I think that would secure my powers for a long time if not forever.
>>217168148>you misunderstood meYes, that is what a genie will do dumbfuck.
>>217167243No, not really. They're like ghosts or gods. Seen as something you don't wanna piss off. Check out this historical piece of genieshttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kdSz3rjgxOM
>>217168162>wish to free the genie>as the two most powerful free beings in the world he immediately takes away your powers>proceeds to rule the cosmosNice job dumbfuck
>>217168229Remember the 2nd wish?
>>217168229or just kills you, i don't know why anyone would free a malevolent being with that kind of power, that's retard shit
>>217168243>he interprets "I wish you were free" as "free to do anything", including free to do things you previously made impossible>>217168263Or this
>>217168263Ain't Aladdin genie simply went away in gratitude? Treat the genie well, grant him his freedom. Why he would waste anymore time with you?
>>217165107ruthless
>>217167209Don’t forget the parts where he morphs into [member of audience] and feeds them information that will make abubu appealing to that demographic
>>217166555this would fuck up everyones body though, water in their blood would turn to mulk
>>217168285Because, again, you're now the two most powerful free beings in the universe. You're probably the only two people who can kill eachother. Even if you don't want to kill eachother right now, you have eternity to do it, and at the very least both of you can't both make the cosmos exactly how you want it.Since he's probably at least thousands of years old and more familiar with being a powerful entity, he probably realizes this right away and stamps you out before you can do anything.Whether you realize it or not, in one instant you gave yourself power over the entire multiverse then created the only possible threat towards yourself. Idiot.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lM0teS7PFMoNot bad, just avoid the final fuck up.
>>217168285>Why he would waste anymore time with you?why wouldn't he be pissed that a lowly fucking worm just made him, an all powerful being, serve at its beck and call
>>217167237kek
>>217166458>releases virtually all powerful jews into the world>expects them to just leave him alonelol. lmao.
The whole "genie fucks you over because you weren't specific in your wording to the tee" is just so boring naratively. I get why they have it, to teach the viewer a lesson or whatever, but at this point in fiction it's just so tired and boring. Ironically enough, wishes were done the best in Aladdin, where the main character was just uncreative because he was a street rat and had no ideas of grandeur enough to really make use of the genie. That's why Jafar was so dangerous when he got the lamp.I suppose any story with a good genie and smart wish-haver would just be boring. But still.
what if i wish that the genie doesnt get freedom
>>217168554They kind of did this in What We Do in the Shadows. The wishes never really bit him in the ass. But that was just bad writing, they implied that the genie would do the whole loophole thing and he never did.
>>217164830Is the genie a jew?
>>217168554>"genie fucks you over because you weren't specific in your wording to the tee"No, the narrative is "genie fucks you over regardless because it's a malevolent supernatural being, and you meddled with powers that you ought not to because of your hubris and greed."You can say it's boring narratively but it's one of those fictions that is so emblematically true of human nature that every culture has their own version of this folklore.
move to a open field and immediately ask for all my friends and family to be present so they can get in line and wish next
>>217168635Well, Nandor's wishes were all so stupid that the genie didn't need to loophole him.
>>217164830I would ask the djinn its name. When I am told, I press the ring that Michael gave me against its neck and let it know that it works for me now. Now wishes are irrelevant, the seal God made will give me the power I need to make the third temple to His glory. The thing to remember that while there are both righteous and unrighteous djini, their souls are made of fire and they are not angels. Therefore, you can control them with God's blessing like Solomon controlling demons to make the first temple.
>>217164830>I wish you'd do whatever I say. Then give commands with never wishing for anything. Infinite wish hack.
What's your favorite lore for how a genie initially got trapped in the lamp?
>>217168657No, Jews are made of dirt. Djini are made of fire.
>>217168786Jewish trickery.
>>217167009It's amazing to me how humans everywhere have known since time immemorial that desire is the path to all suffering.
>>217168769I've never seen one that's particularly interesting. It's either>sorcerer got trapped in a lamp>being from another dimension got summoned by a wizard>genies were once running around free in the world minding their own business until a sorcerer trapped them in a lamp
>>217168554One of the issues I have is that including the truly malevolent Djinn in a story set in our world would by proxy mean God definitely exists.Even if you couldn’t trick it into wishing the wrath of God onto itself, anyone with a brain would run to the nearest church and pray for it to fuck off and leave you alone.
>>217168769King Solomon imprisoned the djini who were not helpful in making the first temple. That's my favorite version but the Disney version has been imprisoned for 10,000 years during the Islamic golden age so it implies God Himself did it.
>>217168842And yet it's impossible to avoid.
>>217167297I thought djini exist because God made anti-angels for reasons He does not share.
>>217168931Not impossible to resist though.
>>217167898You get to be the unknowable outside of time and space can barely comprehend linearity metaphysical “God” of the gaps that is also the biblical god who is eternally ravaged by memories of being tortured to death by Romans at the behest of “your chosen people.”
>>217164830https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OFBYtwcm9Dw
>>217164830I wouldn't say a single word to them. I would listen to what they have to say, and that's what no one did.
>>217167870
>>217169132I wish this anon would kill himself
I'd tell the genie if he imbues any ironic twists into my wishes I'm going to refuse to use the remainder of them and make him my eternal sidekick while being as obnoxious towards him as possible.Alternatively I'd offer to use my 3rd wish on his freedom contingent upon no ironic twists, but that one requires more trust on the genie's part.
>>217169291Pretty sure an all powerful genie could find infinite ways to be annoying.
>>217168994You're not human without desires.
>>217168896The ironic part is that you currently exist in a world where God is real and you deny it.
>>217169270Why instead, don't you listen to what he has to say? Which is what no one did..
>>217164830>I wish for my Second and Third Wish to happen at the exact same time>I wish to be able to grant my own wishes at intentional will.>I wish the Genie's lamp would teleport to the center of the sun.
>>217165107If you had his mouth would you sound like Robin Williams
>>217169385I thought about my 2nd wish
>>217167870Wish granted. You become God. In ascending beyond humanity, you shed ego, identity, and desire. There is no “you” left to enjoy it. You now exist only as the infinite, indifferent energy of the universe.
>>217164830>I wish you and all other djinns go to hellJob done.
>>217166667
>>217168528This post was trying to sound edgy and provocative but it describes EXACTLY the OT in first degree.
What the fuck got janny’s tendies in a twist this time?
Why do fags even need infinite wishes. You can easily set up whatever fantasy life you want for yourself with 3 wishes.
>>217169604The only God is the Christian god and he’s a massive egotistical asshole
>>217167209It's been a while since I watched the movie, but doesn't Jafar use Genie to strip Aladdin of all that stuff.
>>217170150>Judging an entity beyond time and space with 60y/o Freudian bullshit.
>>217170420Saying he’s beyond space and time is an exclusively modern era interpretation that needs to account for the fact he has done absolutely nothing for all of human history.
