How did 3 midgets kill a full grown man? Completely illogical nonsense. That guy would of killed those 3 little people within 60 seconds in real life.
>>217264849words fall from your mouth as shit from ass
OP here, currently watching episode 1... Annnnddd of course, a black woman appears to replace the white man. And im guessing shes going to be the main fucking character and be a gladiator that kills everyone and oogga booga blah blah blah. lol hollywood is still woke and gay.
>>217264863As does yours. BEGONE you OOGA BOOGA!
>>217264877She doesnt keep watching
>>217264849Everyone knows the best Roman soldiers were Nordic Norwegian Vikings!
>>217264905I just looked at the "images" tab on google and shes in literally almost all the pictures and promos. How does she not?
>>217264936The same way a movie trailer shows you something but is something else when you actually watch the movie
>>217264877>>217264905>Roman legionaries, Germans, Gauls, and Thracians are all completely mogged by trained gladiators>nubian qween dabs on all the gladiators because of her African warrior training
>>217264849>How did 3 midgets kill a full grown man?Mecha Shiva!
>>217264952ok I am now watching episode 2. She does have a banging body I must say, but my god that face.. The dominus' guys girlfriend/harem slut/sluts are super banging!
>>217265028lol yeah ok bruv... Your babbling nonsensical nonsense like the nonsenser nonce you are!
>>217264863>>217264863See idle words give way to clash of swords!
>>217265141>>217264863
I just don't get why they put so many women in these action movies/shows showing them kicking full grown mens asses. Makes zero sense.
>>217264849why did you start a thread with a 11 KB thumbnail? Is it because you're a retarded phone poster?
I feel like the showrunner was so afraid of people like this >>217264877 he went the other way too much. We're closing in on episode 8 and Achillia still gets her ass beaten by other gladiators who are supposed to be absolute jobbers by the wayThe worst thing about this show thought is the meandering plot. It just goes in circles again and again, Ashur gets his dose of cucking and/or humiliation, Achillia talks shit and get smacked, end of
>>217265243She only loses due to convient excuses>made to use a shield that was too heavy,immediately switches to dual wielding with no training and wins>later loses due to hand injury so she switches to a spear. It turns out she was even better with a spear than with swords!>only looses at the last second because of her trauma causing her to hesitate
>>217264849Midgets have a low center of gravity and chimpanzee strength.
>>217264921Folks this. The history books show the Romans was Aryans and Germanic. Likely Protestant.
>>217265338yeah i agree the excuses are flimsy. but at this point i'd rather they go full schlock and just make her the spartacus. The fucking preview to episode EIGHT shows she still can't fight and Ashur is STILL getting humiliated. Fucking hell they are really banking on getting more seasons aren't they?
I was really hoping while he was on Opium he was going to see visions of Batiatus or Crixus or something haunting him.
>>217264849>would ofopinion discarded
>>217264849Seeing Ashur bumble his way through the story makes me miss Batiatus so much
>>217264877No, moron. The main character is Ashur. There's a little hint you may not have noticed: The name of the FUCKING show: House of Ashur. Not house of Achillia. Was Spartacus called House of Batiatus? NO. Of course not. You fucking retards, coming here, shitting up this board with your retarded worth less than shit opinions. Just fucking kill yourself.
>>2172648493 trained midgets with a lance
>female joins ludus>she is immediately raped brutally and continuously until she dies later>doctore laughs at dominus and says what did you expectnow this sounds like spartacus!
>>217265657lies fall from your mouth like piss into ocean, ashur. make leave and return to niggertemple you claim is a ludus
About to watch E07 now. What am I in for, brothers?
>>217266137nothing happens
>>217266240Koriss kills two of the midges and Ashur gets high as fuck and fucks his slave girl.
so by the third episode:>girlboss is clearly positioned to be new spartacus>pretty much 60-70% of the show has been literal shot for shot remakes of scenes from the original>doctore is white(holy shit) and therefore is being pressured into homosexuality to save the ludus and hated by allwow cant wait for episode 4
>>217266923>being pressured into homosexualitylazy bait for bumps
>>217264849how many midgets is necessary to take you down anon?
>>217267176Half a million
>>217266991>4th episode he pisses NEXT to her because "we cant have him piss on a female black!">the other gladiators are soifacing while it cuts to again show the stream of piss being beside her
i stood up and yas queen'd when the gladiators gave her a round of applause when she returned to training in the recent episodebut the toxic masculine incel turned them against her again
I could kill an unlimited number of midgets.
>>217267293well think fast punk*throws ∞ warwick davis right into your eye*
>>217266991good point, i hadn't watched the next episode when he starts to welcome the homosexuality and be sugar daddy'd by a weird arabian "roman"
>>217267309nothing personnel midge
Did they white ashur up for this? Why is he so pale? He looks like a brunette boomhaer
>>217267342>MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMHHHH
>>217264849>How did 3 midgets kill a full grown man?By being 3, you fucking retard. The world is littered with people who did HEMA/historical reconstitution and that will tell you how much just being 11v10 would tip the scale in the favour of the outnumbering party. You look at one midget, and meanwhile, the other 2 will strike you.Ever notice how, in movies where one character fight a multitude, the goons will nicely wait for the last one to get pummeled before striking, and how, as soon as they get out of the camera, it's like they instantly despawn and never attack again?
>>217264849Current year television is retarded propaganda made for 80 iq brown people, mentally ill feminists, and self-loathing leftists? Imagine my shock.
>>217267379bro there is no shot 3 midges take out a normal person, they can barely walklike, go two stairs up a staircase and you are practically unassailable. stand on a chair and you might as well be on the moon to them.
>>217267379how many 3 year old midgets would it take then
>>217267511Bro have you seen them sitting? they would use the dwarves with the weird walk as cannon fodder while they flank your rear
>>217267534Flank my rear? Are you retarded? You can just pick one up and walk nonchalantly away with it. By the time the others catch up hours later you can have cooked and eaten it entirely.
>>217266682>koriss kills characters that were always meant to be killed and goes back to status quoit's soap opera tier writing
i'm trying not to like the bogged spanish bitch but her ass when she was going down on caeser's even more bogged wife is extremely pleasing. i think she won me over
>>217267568>You can just pick one up and walk nonchalantly away with it.while you're "picking him up" his gang of midgets has been stabbing you furiously over and over
>>217267622bro in what world? have you seen them try to walk? get real if you want to actually discuss this, i'm not going to talk hypotheticals with a doofus
>>217267661dude one day at my school when i was a kid they brought midgets into the school and just let kids ask them questions for a half hour. so im pretty sure im a midget expert
there's that thing in movie fights where they don't even need to apply strength to block or deflect blowsi think in real life if a person struck downward toward a midge's head with a weapon and the midge tried to block it with their own weapon, the blow would burst straight through the defense as if it were a child attempting it
>>217265657still not watching niggerslop
>>217267873anon is there really no way i can make you reconsider niggerslop?
>>217267766i bet one warrior dwarf would get you, you wouldnt even last 10 minutes in him
>>217265243They are giving her the proper "hero journey" by having her fail first, thinking that will excuse her being able to defeat men later on. It's a desperate attempt to keep the "chuds" from calling her a girlboss. Although judging from a lot of the retards here, it seems to be working so kudos I guess.
>>217264849
>>217268698yeah it's working on me. they beat her into the ground, they had her get naked, they had her fuck a white man. of course i would have liked a white man mc before everything else, but i can't really complain at this point
>>217267360Eddie hall?
>>217264849is anyone actually watching a trashfire? The nigger female gladiator is an insta-nope from me.
>>217268893>but i can't really complainI can because it's still going to look stupid when she inevitably starts killing dudes left and right. Shit is so cringe they actually have me liking and rooting for the zoomer haircut son character. I keep hoping they'll actually have the balls to just have her get killed at the end of the season but that's clearly not what they're building towards.
>>217269107>when she inevitably starts killing dudes left and righti'm a couple of episodes behind, i'm on episode 5 right now. she hasn't started doing that by episode 7 yet? that's good
>>217269033I enjoy watching her talk shit and then get shieldbashed in the face and fall down.
>>217269215>she hasn't started doing that by episode 7 yet? that's goodYeah I don't see how thats good when we already know what the endgame is
>>217269393> I don't see how thats goodsimple. it extends the enjoyable period of the show, before the retarded period of the show sets in
>>217269442Ah. You see it as enjoyable, I see it as a complete waste. What is otherwise a good show, could of been a great show if her screen time went to something actually worthwhile.
>>217265243this first season is to teach Ashur he will never be respected, second season will have him being more ruthless and see Hilaria's ascent.
>>217269033I enjoy every episode and just skip past plots I don't care for, just like I did for the og spartacus.
>>217264849The original IP was too much hell yeah dude bro shit, so they decided to resurrect it and make it more yaaaass queeeeen slaaaaaayyyyy look at these little gremlins, this black queen, and these homo arcs
>>217266137Gay old man commits hate crime against 2 (two) vertically challenged persons
i find myself fast forwarding through every sex sceneis this what it's like to feel old
>>217264849gay shit for fags
>>217270363no, old people aren't frightened by sex scenes like the younger generations are now
>>217270492i'm not frightened though i feel like i see tits merkins and prosthetic cocks in every show these days it's just boring as fuck, normalize bare penetration i say
>>217264849That was a good twist desu
>>217264863poetry
op involves cock, and the pleasuring thereof
Total midge death!
>>217264849So, Ashur was the worst gladiator in the old series.And in this show he shown to be much skilled than his gladiators.So, his gladiators are absolute shit.
>>217273339Yes, good job, that was explained in the show several times. And Ashur still had plenty of fights afterward with his personal squad of goons to get better.
>>217273339No, its a make believe alternative reality, like an ego's final dream before death, and even in this dream Ashur dreams he is humiliated and outplayed
So ashur DIDNT reveal his plan on purpose? should i still hope for a 200IQ keikaku reveal?
>>217273421it's not an alternate reality. It's the always-planned continuation of the series. They needed to add a silly underworld scene so morons like you wouldn't complain about "how da guy bak alive and show continue afta 10 yars?! this impossible!" They knew you would endlessly whine as usual since you're such simple people.
>>217273516So they inserted one single out of place mystical resurrection scene rather than a continuation of mystical themes occurring
>>217269033Yes, turns out shows can still be good while having black characters, shockingly.
>>217269824You never watched the original. There was tons of homoshit and yass queen slay in the original, both more than House of Ashur so far.
>>217264877It only gets worse.
ummm aktchewallly ashur died in the original show so this entire thing is nothing but fan fic not worth even watching, they don't even tough on the subject about him being dead and somehow being alive in this show.
>>217273455>Ashur forgot that he told his nemesis about his plansI wonder if someone has the GOT image where one of the writers talks about the queen forgetting about her enemies.The writing is horrendous
>>217274782>>217273455I think its more like Ashur didn't expect Proculus to oturight murder an entire villa's worth of people like that. >>217274758Literally addressed in the first 5 minutes of episode 1.
>>217264849>functionally wins>gets cocky and boastful>gives enough time for the midget to recover and surprise attack him>dies from being retardedDumb speedwatchers.
>>217267572It's the best show on tv right now.
>>217276073Definitely. And only three more episodes left!
>>217273339>So, Ashur was the worst gladiator in the old series.Well, only in comparison to the star gladiators, like Gannicus, Crixus and Spartacus. There were other NPC gladiators who Ashur was better than and he did pretty good in that one arena battle, before Crixus purposely took him out of the fight.
>>217273455>So ashur DIDNT reveal his plan on purpose?Ashur's natural arrogance combined with his hatred for Proculus caused him to slip up.
>>217273273God tier cinematography.
>>217274674>You never watched the original. There was tons of homoshit and yass queen slay in the original, both more than House of Ashur so far.True, though the yass queen stuff was a side story whereas in this show, Girlboss (who is also Black) is the co-star along with Ashur.But it's to be expected, as the original series was from 2010-13 and woketardation hadn't infected society to the level today. That said, I just FF thru the Girlboss scenes.
>>217276284Can't take anyone named Proculus seriously. Sounds like some sort of archaic ass doctor.
>>217276386In the original Ashur is literally decapitated in single combat by a black woman he raped.
>>217276420He didn't rape her. He was given her as reward and use his slave as intended. He didn't hurt her whatsoever. It's not his fault the slave was illegally fucking another slave and decided her Master's laws were bullshit.
>>217276453Oh, you're one of those.
>>217276420Sure, but neither Worst Naevia nor Ashur were the stars of that show.Again, just FF thru the Girlboss scenes, (unless it looks like there may be some plot exposition happening) as there is nothing important going on in them.
>>217276481It's literally what is depicted in the show, dumb fuck. He didn't just sneak in one night, beat the fuck out of her, and fuck her then sneak off. You may as well say Batiatus raped all his slaves and all the other Gladiator's raped the women given to them as rewards too
>>217276481Do you also think that Spartacus is the good guy? He's the villain.
>>217276481If you insist on applying modern day social standards to a historical fiction tv series, this show is probably not for you.
>>217276574This isn't a discussion about whether Ashur is a rapist. It's a discussion about the writer's intentions for portraying Ashur being killed vengefully by a woman. This board is probably not for you.
>>217276681Glad you concede that Ashur isn't a rapist. Now shut the fuck up, doofus.
>>217276681>It's a discussion about the writer's intentions for portraying Ashur being killed vengefully by a woman.And he was killed by Naevia in the original series but this is an alternate timeline where he wasn't (though Girlboss probably kills him in the finale of the series).
>>217276767If she doesn't slice Ashur's dick off like the black woman in the original series then she isn't half the Girlboss Naevia was.
>>217276259He was mid even before he was crippled. His entire stock is trash and would get dabbed on by any of the jobbers from the earlier seasons.
>>217276073It was overshadowed by the fights and tits but spartacus had a lot of subtlety and nuance in its characters relationships and power squabblesI'm kinda tired of ashur and korris repeating they're not friends at every interaction to spell out the ambiguity for the viewersThe dialogue in general also lost any kind of subtlety
>>217267614>caeser's even more bogged wifeShe's hot as hell
>>217276889come on now
>>217276868>We'll just write the dialogue in plain english and then have Grok translate it into yodaspeak, and make sure there's an expletive in every single line, no one will ever realize that we have no idea what we're doing
>>217276386Achillia is getting less screentime and accolades than Naevia did.
>>217276889I like her face but her tits being so obviously fake takes me out of it.
Now that Koriss is back, the Father is 1000% dead, probably this season. It's annoying they're retreading the same character development for Achillia in the same fucking season with her spear chucking-phobia. We just did this shit with the hand scars, we get it. Let papa-bear fuck the PTSD out of her nubian ass so we can get back to the Arena and scheming. I'm also mad Koriss had to steal the show from the other gladiators. I like when the gladiators get to participate in extracurricular activities. >>217277036Her face is gigantic, it's grotesque. At least we got to see Hilara's fat ass.
>>217277098I don't really think its retreading, its just a continuation of the same plotline that wasn't resolved yet. It won't be resolved until we actually find out what her backstory was.
>>217264877yea I deleted all the episodes once I finished ep1. who fucking asked for this shit?
>>217264863also that way of speaking feels so forced in this. idk maybe I remember S1 wrong but it felt much more natural then
