>I can't kill anyone for you.Fine. My first wish is for an international team of loyal deadly assassins. They follow every order I give them without question.Second wish: my team of assassins and myself are completely above the law, immune to every national and international law. We cannot be arrested, charged, convicted, detained, or fined.Third wish: total control over the world's arsenals, including nuclear weapons.What are your three wishes, /tv/?
I wish I was dead.I don't need the other two.
I'm genuinely a nice person, so I'd use my last wish to free the genie. I hate being such a cuckmoralfag.
Absolute priority in the three-dimensional space. Everything yields to me.
>>217787741Just wish for omnipotence, then you can do anything.
>>217787811uh no thanks I want to actually use my dick, who would wish for that lol
>>2177877411. For everyone on the Epstein files to bump their toe or knee every day for the rest of their lives2. For the cut footage from the Magnificent Ambersons to be restored so the film can be seen as Welles intended3. For there to be no more wish-granting genies
How would Wishmaster fuck up these wishes?
1. anime and anime enjoyers disappear from existence. priority2. money, lots of it.3. news and media all of a sudden tells the truth. humanity will fix itself
I'd wish for everyone to do whatever I wanted.So I guess it'd be Pluribus except without all the bitching and complaining about the power fantasy.
>>217788070>news and media all of a sudden tells the truth. humanity will fix itselfwhoa now easy on the anti-semitism
1. i wish to override the rules.2. i wish for unlimited wishes.3. i wish for a Yorkshire Terrier that never dies.
>>217788030>you get your first two wishes>shortly after making your third wish one of your assassins removes their mask>its The Wishmaster(tm)>he stabs you to death while quipping
>>217787811
>>2177877411. I wish that you spend the rest of eternity slowly losing your memory and going mad2. You can't end your own lifeThen I toss the lamp in the ocean and fuck Zelda.
>>217787741First Wish: For the entirety of the lost writings and works of all the great civilisations i.e. Greece, Rome, Egypt, Carthage, Babylonia, Assyria, Phoenicia, Vikings, Germans tribes, Medieval, Persian, Arabic, China, Japan, Korean, Vietnam, Aztecs, Mayans, Mixtecs, Zapotec, Olmec, Slavs to be rediscovered, recovered, published and persevered.Second Wish: For every lost portion of the old Internet including game mods, user made levels, classic YouTube, Geocities, Fortune City, Yahoo Groups, Japanese Geocities, Yahoo Answers, Flash Games and much more to be rediscovered, recovered, preserved and made public available Third Wish: Eternal life and age reversal to be invented and made available.
>>217787875 >For the cut footage from the Magnificent Ambersons to be restored so the film can be seen as Welles intendedincredibly based
First I'd wish for a million dollars.Second would be for a beautiful woman I can fuck whenever I want.Third I would wish for a pumpkin head.
>>217787741>give all jews an incurable deadly disease that will remove them from the globe within the year>same with jets>I guess maybe money or something
>>217787741
>>217787741>i.e. make me Israel or the United States
>>217788214>First I'd wish for a million dollars.money desire is relative. the grass is always greener.doesn't matter how much you have, your desires would eventually return to a baseline.
>>217788180
>>2177877411. to be immortal and in peak physical health/attractiveness and immune to all diseases/afflictions. basically wolverine but with extremely reduced pain sensations and a killswitch that only I can activate when I choose to end it2. to have the purple man/killgrave's power to make people do whatever I want but it can't be nullified or suppressed3. to control time, to pause, rewind, fast forward, or to any period i'd likei think that would keep me entertained for a while
>>217788320>you'd be just as happy in poverty as rich
>>217787811I wished for impotencehow do I take back my wish??
>>217787741I wish to be a young biologically woman with huge tits and ass
>>217787741Okay, so you got yourself assassins and nukes. What's the next step of your master plan? You could order hits on people and do military strikes, but for what purpose? And are you sure a team of "loyal deadly assassins" is enough to keep you alive from retaliation? You didn't say they were superheroes.
>>217787794He would either kill or rape you.
>>217788699Soft.
1. A hot meal2. I can bring friends on the flight plan for me and my men3. I'd listen and that's what no one did
3 FAT BITCHES
I would save Hitler.
>>217788691>That isn't what I meant! My dick is useless now! I wish I didn't have this useless dick!
Teleport everyone I hate to the surface of the closest planet besides earth that can support human life
>>217788759assassins, doxx and hunt down this anon
>>2177877411. Wish I knew what to wish for2. Wish for that3. Free the djinn
>I wish I had a loaded rifle >I wish you had a vagina>I wish you were mortal*Proceed to rape, murder, and rape the genie*
I wish I had the biggest penis on earth.>10 foot whale dick rips my pants
>>2177877411. cure disease2. unironic peace on earth3. upon death, everyone chooses their afterlife, whether it be reincarnation, the eternal heaven of their choice, or re-living their lives in any altering variation of their choosing, the choice can be changed at any point
>>217788155Jafar fucked up by specifically wishing to become a Genie. As a Genie he has rules, is bound to a lamp despite having cosmic power. If he just thought pragmatically for a few seconds he could have reworded it and said “I wish to have powers that rival a Genie” or even “I wish to become a god.” All the power, none of the down sides.
>>217788070humanity would only fix itself with dedicated autists. and you removed those in step one.
>>217788651How does wishing for those things make you a fag?
>>217787741I wish jaden smith explained what he meant by "pregnant dragon" Ya know, he was onta something with that.
>>217787741First, i wish the djinn has very bad short term memory...
>>217787741I wish atomic bonds didn't exist.
>>217787761/thread
>>217787741I just want an indestructible body so I can explore this planet without dying. Imagine the shit there is in the Amazones. Problem is you won't get far without being eaten alive either by animals or locals or supernatural beings
>>217787830
>>217787741Seriously? First would be the ability to teleport at will whevever I so pleased, and to be able to take people with me by touching them. Second, for my mum to be young again so she can live her adult life over again and make better decisions. Third, probably free the genie because fuck it why not.
>>217787741I wish anything I wrote down came true in precisely the way I intended it to so long as I finished my written desire with the phrase Shim Sham Bamalamb.I don't need the other two wishes. I'll free you at the end of time genie see you in a few billion years.
>>217788320This is always such a brainlet belief. Only stupid retards couldn't be happy being rich.
>>217791082Isn't she canonically like 14 and Jafar 40-something?
>>217787741>he says he can't make anyone fall in love with you Not a problem, I wish for super pheromones that make girls wet their their panties whenever I enter a room
>>217791102age of consent was 14 at the time
I want a new video game that doesn't suckThen I want a new 7 season tv series that doesn't suckand then I want a new book series that doesn't suck
>>217787741I wish to replace all your genies for the djinn from wishmaster. This can´t be cancelled, counterspelled, avoided nor reversed in any way. Have fun.
Lotta super gay wishes in this thread1: Triple world hunger2: All blind people can see, but only for 30 seconds 3: Water now tastes disgusting, no matter what you do to it
>>217787741I wish to be an all powerful free genie.
>>217787741Waste of wishes
1: Every nuke in the world explodes at the same time right now2: Every jew is now beyond bankrupt3: Every cloud in the sky is now a solid block of lead
>>217791266Upvoted
>>217787741I can't wish.
>>2177877411) Everyone is brown. Everyone.2) Popcorn and a telly with all the major news channels from around the globe3) Free the genieThen just go watch the world burn
>>217791398I think your first wish achieves all by itself the other two
Let me introduce the concept "blorp". Here is its definition: x is blorp df=x is very popularx is very handsomex is very intelligentx is very sexually attractivex lives a very long lifespanx lives in a world without nations at warx is very socially skilled and charmingx lives in a world where all cancers are easily curablex lives in a world where heart disease and diabetes are easily curablex lives in a world where all forms of dementia are easily curablex lives in a world where people at risk of starvation are fedx remains as young-looking as he wants until deathMy first wish: I wish "blorp" were already a concept, so that, while unusual and not widely known under the interpretation above, the genie would be aware of it before meeting me, and thus would not accuse me of inventing it.My second wish: I wish I were blorp.
>Wishes for invisibility>Immediately hit by a truckngl I laughed.
>>217787741Immortality, magneto powers and teleportation.You could hold the world hostage in a few days, I’d just install myself as my countrys king and my family would be royalty and live off of taxpayer money forever.
>>217789050wrong. weak faggots are the problem. just look around(i got a warning from JANNIE for talking bad about tranime LOL)
>>2177877411. I wish to have instant access to whatever information in the universe I want to whenever I want to, and ONLY whatever and whenever I want to.2. I wish for my body to have the quirk to never deteriorate due to old age, thus making me forever young for as long as I live.3. I wish that nobody will ever ever take any action that would result in my death or permanently crippling my body.That's it, objectively the best wishes ever, if I ever wanted some gay shit like Jedi powers I would just now where to find another lamp or how to trick some retard into wishing things for me.
>>217793174weak f*ggots designed Chad's city after he finished conquering land and putting his harem together, sir.
