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the drunken edition
prev >>217841385
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tender homosexual sex with valarr targaryen
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sex with baelor breakspear
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>mfw Anon doesn't like the Fossoway Cider™ meme
>>
this shit is hella cute
bitches are gonna be down to watch
>>
>>217844498
Honestly not a great scene
>>
>>217844461
Why was dunk angry at sadboy targ again ?
>>
>>217844533
He said that Dunk kidnapped Egg to cover his ass
>>
>>217844498
that facial hair looks glued on
>>
>>217844461
>house braken has the opportunity to prrove their honor
>guy actually just got up to fart and clown on the entire situation
Avarage pathetic Braken, no wonder they aleays having their ass kicked by chadwoods
>>
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>>217844649
That shit was hilarious tho
You can’t handle the brap bracken bantz
>>
>>217844461
I'm starting to get real fucking sick of this show. I don't know if it's the editing or the writing, or just that one bitch producer Martin was talking about but they undercut every tense moment with some dumbass shit or fart joke. Like every episode. Duncan makes some serious bold claim the music swells and then on cue some low brow shit gag. I'm getting real close to being done with it.
>>
Everyone's always told me I was stupid
>>
>>217844705
…And?
>>
>>217844693
No they don’t it was literally once and it wasn’t a particularly well written scene to begin with. Martin is really not the kind of writer that reaches the emotional highs you pretend the show is stopping you from reaching
>>
parker needs to be removed from the show if he doesn't stop inserting his scat fetish
>>
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>>217844461
HE COMETHS
>>
>>217844693
the low brow shit is intentional to contrast it to stick up the ass incest royalty show
probably not going to get better
>>
More wine your grace?
>>
>>217844722
Huh?
>>
>>217844756
Cider
>>
Only good show in a decade and tv trannies are all just whining about it.
>>
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>>217844498
I NEED to rape and brat tame Aerion.
>>
>>217844794
herpes
>>
>>217844765
What did you do when people said you were stupid?
>>
>>217844756
Youll bring me coider or else youll get a clout on the ear
>>
>>217844818
What business is that of yours? My problems are my own
>>
>>217844693
Cope and seethe
>>
>>217844818
I was fooled by a peddler’s simple jape
>>
Mayhaps
>>
Dunk and Egg has ruined the series in television form. Like they can basically never go back to GoT because no one will care compared to this. Like this is the series the people have fully invested into now, and any current day stuff with got is done. They can do any post series or side series during it, it's done and over because of the standard and aura that akotsk has. It's so much better than the brooding of GoT
>>
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>>217844461
I fucking love asoiaf and the fat cunt refuses to write more of it
>>
>>217844970
The season’s not over yet.
>>
>>217844743
Based green apple boy
>>
Can you imagine being a Targaryen prince and losing 1v1 against a glorified peasant in front of a crowd? Even if I lived that shit would scar me for life. I'd never be able to show my face in public
>>
>>217844970
>stuff GRRM and HBO wish was true but isn't

all you had to do was tell the story in two hours you fucking idiots.
>>
Doom of Valyria, Azor Hai, White Walkers. 300 years of dragon rule? All filler in the great Bracken Vs Blackwood conflict.
>>
>>217844705

How right were they?
>>
>>217845041
but what if you could turn into a dragon proper, just one sip
>>
>>217845041
That was the kino we deserved
>>
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>>217845046
Westeros is merely the setting of the endless proxy war between blackwoods and brackens
>>
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Steffo Fossaway's armor was pretty fancy. Too fancy. Why would a simple Appleman have fancier armor than everyone else?
>>
LORD ASHFORD FUCKS HIS SHEEP
>>
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>>217844743
I drink a green apple jelly cup right now in toast to him.
>>
so how good of a fighter is dunk actually? where does he rank among the best warriors in asoiaf?
>>
>>217844732
>No they don’t it was literally once
It was the declaration of becoming a night, The end of the second episode when he's fuming about how everyone is an ass and direspects hedge knights then the beginning of the 3rd where this goes into there are no fights for low ranks until the next day and he makes the comment about throwing up all morning out of nervousness , then this, the fourth episode with the call for a night that's answered with a wet fart. They have undercut most of his dramatic moments with some form of body function humorus moment. Almost every episode.

>>217844939
I am already seething and I can't cope which is why I'm bitching about it.
>>217844749
>the low brow shit is intentional to contrast it to stick up the ass incest royalty show
Doesn't the show just mainly following a hedge knight do that.
>>
>>217845081
a simple appleman? hes steffon fucking fossoway you little targcunt
>>
>>217845041
https://youtu.be/uDfcKques-s
>>
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>>217845081
Fossoway Cider is the most popular cider in the Seven Kingdoms.
>>
>red or black
>green or black
who the fuck wrote this.
>>
>>217845041
he is like 7 feet tall
>>
>>217844997
Getting a book the quality of the later seasons would hurt even more
>>
>>217845128
Umm they have animals too get it right
>>
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>>217845128
>>
>>217845123
Kek
>>
>>217845128
So stupid right
>>
>>217845168
Trump ruined the economy. We need a new master of coin
>>
who was right?
>>
>>217845143
Martin is a fat cunt but he's not Dan and Dave
He can write, even at his worst it would be readable
>>
>Robb dies
>Quentyn dies
>Aegon will die via Daenerys fire
Why does George hate sensitive young men so much
>>
>>217845182
House Blackwood

p.s fuck the Brackens
>>
can someone explain the lady's fortune to egg
>>
Gurm wants to write scifi which is why he keeps circling back around to time travel
>>
>>217845217
>>Quentyn dies
>
>>
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>>217845182
>>
>>217845217
>>Quentyn dies
Oh no no no
>>
>>217845105
The narrative weight is supposed to come from Raymund fighting with him in friendship on the strength of only a few conversations, Egg running around recruiting people for him even though he’s fighting his dad and brother and Baelor deciding to fight for him though. Not anything to do with being a true knight, which would redeem the system and suggest its not mostly inhabited by selfish hypocrites which is most definitely not what martin wants to do in the story.
>>
>>217845259
Fuck off Preston
>>
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>>217845238
Get brapped on kid, brackens 4 lyfe!!
>>
>>217845217
>>Aegon will die via Daenerys fire
>will
Doing a lot of lifting there
>>
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You are now a Targaryen and must marry and impregnate a family member of yours. Who do you choose?
>>
>>217845294
Dany
>>
If a Bracken fought for Aerion would a Blackwood have immediately jumped in for Dunk?
>>
>>217845294
Jaehaerys' tomboy daughter.
>>
>>217845290
>cut from the show
There is 0 and I mean 0 chance he survives unless Martin has rewritten everything to specifically subvert the audience on this single plot point
>>
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>>217845294
>>
>>217845318
You can bet your ass on that
And the reverse would also happen
>>
>>217845309
>>217845320
>>217845336
Your family anon, not the shows...
>>
they're really making the most of the 30 minutes
>>
>>217845080
Poor tully having to tardwrangle those retards
>>
>>217845328
>There is 0 and I mean 0 chance he survives
Conjecture
>>
>>217845294
Jacaerys
>>
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>>217845259
>>217845268
>>
>>217845348
All the women born into my family are cunts. It is known.
It's actually remarked upon by the men in the family quite often.
>>
>>217845328
kek no anon he will survive, show up in ASoIAF at 100 years old and be king at the end of the series.
>>
>>217845336
This guy is based
>>
>>217845242
Egg becomes king Aegon V "the Unlikely". He rules in favour of commoners after learning humility and honour from Dunk. Pushback from nobles forces him to dial back his reforms so he starts trying to hatch dragon eggs. Egg wants to bring back the dragons to preserve his family and to serve the people, but during some mysterious ritual he sets the place on fire and kills the majority of Targaryans including himself.
>>
>>217845397
He should have just had all the nobles killed.
>>
>>217845294
Rahenyra (forma de Monke)
>>
>>217845421
With what?
>>
>>217845348
My sister and I have a history so her I guess. Not double dipping incest.
>>
>>217845294
Naerys but she’s frail I wouldn’t want to hurt her
>>
>>217845436
>My sister and I have a history
Do go on
>>
>>217845434
The smallfolk
>>
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>>217845436
>My sister and I have a history
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>>217845116
I haven't watched that shit, at that moment was Monke still wet for Criston or Dr. Who? Or both of them
>>
>>217845474
He's going to coordinate the entire peasantry across a massive kingdom without the nobles' knowledge and with no way to equip or train them to withstand the trained military caste that all nobles have close to hand.
Yeah, trying to re-hatch the dragons was the more likely plan.
>>
>>217845488
Both of them
She prefers dr who but would never say no to a good colecock
>>
Duncan the Tall? What's next, Duncan the Small?
>>
>>217845512
What a ho, she really deserved the sunfyre barbecue.
>>
>>217845503
The "military caste" is like a few thousand people who conscript lowborn people every time they fight a war. The overwhelming majority of the people fighting in any given conflict are the people Aegon is attempting to liberate.
>>
>>217845559
Just like irl knights will btfo a rabble of serfs.
>>
Why didn't Rhaenyra simply marry Aegon
>>
>>217845569
>irl knights
I could fuck up Elton John and Ian McKellan. It would be easy.
>>
This show isn't getting much hype. HotD is also slipping into obscurity. I think it's over for the Fat Man.
>>
Baelor got his head smashed in by his own brother (bloodraven) defending a random hedge knight, his grandchildren were all stillborn (bloodraven), and both his sons were killed in a plague (bloodraven). He’s sort of a KWAB ngl
>>
>>217845559
Yes, and how is he going to coordinate them? How is he going to convince or conscript them in his war?
>>
>>217845587
Trite.
>>
>>217845591
>by his own brother (bloodraven)
What?
>>
>>217845572
Otto proposed this
But Aegon was 0 years old and Rahenyra was 15 when he did so Viserys didn't even consider it
>>
Fuck, I really hope things go well for Dunk's side.
>>
>>217845456
Nothing interesting. We'd hump as kids, later it escalated to actual sex. It wasn't romantic as far as I can tell and we broke it off when I was around 18 for reasons I'm not sure about. I greentexted it once on /pol/ while very drunk.
>>
>>217845618
That's not even the most egregious age gap in Westeros
>>
>>217845269
I don't know what I'm missing that isn't communicating this properly. It's not SOLELY the type of humor. It's that it happens like every episode. NOW, 4 episodes in, it's been over done, overplayed, it has become in only 4 episodes a trope that now undermines the drama of any scene because I am now expecting something childish to follow almost immediately. And again, no problem with childish humor, no real problem with lightening a heavy scene with some humor to even things out. But they are doing it to the point it is not a welcome reprieve from a dark moment the dark moments are clearly or at least appear to be setups for these punchlines. And it's not even a different kind of punchline. The "joke" is always the same. The "narrative weight" is being undercut because, in my opinion, before any climax of those moments it is almost every time being broken up by these humorous shiting, puking, fart jokes. The consistency and similar nature of the jokes at this point is tiring, because they happen in relatively the same place in regards to the story and are the same type of joke throughout.

THAT IS MY PROBLEM.
Not low brow humor in general.
Not they're ruining my heck'n medieval drama with jokes.
>>
>>217845639
With the elder being the female?
>>
>first GRRM blog post in months today
>no mention of winds
>talks about all the events he has been at instead of writing
kek
>>
Ep4: Dunk has to put together a team.
Ep5: Final fight
Ep6: Final fight II
????
>>
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>>217844461
>>
>>217845639
Viserys was specifically looking for Rahenyra to have a happy marriage
Waiting 15 years to be married in her thrithies to her teenage brother is hardly what he intended
>>
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>>217845591
>smashed in by his own brother (bloodraven)
Have you take a leave of your senses?
>>
>>217845646
Either older girl sisterwife or dead dragons and the family name in flames via Civil War
>>
>>217845648
At this point I hope he lives healthily until like 110 years old, and also never releases another book.
Fuck the fans.
>>
>>217845697
>becomes the first man to achieve immortality
>>
>>217845559
People rarely act for their collective interest. They need something to organise them like a religion or leaders.
>>217845666
ep 1
>lead up
>hopefully smallfolk love
>fight
ep 2
>fight climax
>fallout
>ending
>>
>>217845683
Provoke the bee, and suffer its sting
>>
>>217845646
Well Visenya was the elder wasn't she?
>>
>>217845648
Reading Martin's blog is the ltieral definition of an humiliation ritual
>>
>>217845724
By 15 years?
>>
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>>217845683
>>
>>217845715
Well ser, if honey won't work we'll use the stingers
>>
This show is kino. I'm surprised. That was a good twist with Egg.
I'm all in now
>>
>>217845591
Blackfyre shit losing his mind
>>
>>217845759
You're lying. And I can prove it.
>>
>>217845328
>unless Martin has rewritten

Anon he hasn't written, let alone rewritten an ending to these plots.
>>
>>217845724
Aegon had TWO wives, and it wasn't arranged when he was a toddler, Visenya had time to do whatever she wanted beforehand.

What Otto was proposing was to Rahenyra (who wanted to marry of her own volition) accept to wait 16 fucking years for her brother whom she might not even like so when she is 31 she can start having children

This is not only stupid, but also dangerous because during those years all kind of things could happen that fuck up the royal family and ruin the chance for an heir
>>
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>>217845714
>or leaders
Like a King?
>>
>>217845397
>including himself.

Anon if you don't think Dunk doesn't put down his friend who has gone mad you don't understand how to properly write a Tragedy (of Summerhall)
>>
>>217845759
Sadly this is still GOT so I assume next episode Dunc will be betrayed by the kid that just got knighted and Egg raped while a random peasant takes a huge dump on Dunc's severed head.
>>
>>217845788
>SER ARLAN OF THE LAKE WHAT IS YOUR WISDOM
>The fuck do you want me to say, you're fucked Dunk.
>>
I will align with literally anyone, pay any amount of money, ruin any peace just for a chance to fuck over the Blackfyres
>>
>>217845635
How much of a fucking troll is your sister be to agree to fuck her brother who drunk posts on /pol/.
This is where talking incest beyond porn is the absolute worst because the "best" case is that your story is true and it involves two people you desperately never want to see naked let alone fucking.
>>
>>217845813
It's called A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms. How are they going to kill him off with episodes left? GoT wasn't called Ned the Northern Nonce.
>>
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>Leave the subhuman red apples to me.
>>
>>217845648
GRRM wrote himself into a corner. There's too many plot points to tie up neatly with just 2 books. A Dream of Spring is going to be depressing and end the entire series on a sad note which GRRM wont have the balls to do. There's literally no happy ending
>What happens to Stannis
>What happens to Dany
>What happens to Jon
>Whats Euron's endgame?
>>
How is Dunk so fucking big when he was a homeless orphan? Shouldn't his growth have been stunted by malnutrition?
>>
>>217845792
The king orders lords, lords order knights and knights order peasants. The king saying something miles away doesn't matter when your lord and his knights say the opposite.
>>
>>217845614
>>217845693
They mean all of that was orchestrated by (bloodraven) because it's similar to how other anons imply the (jews).
Glad I could explain a pretty obvious joke to at least two autistics.
>>
>>217845858
They'll cut him into seven pieces and bury a piece in each kingdom. Last scene is a dog unearthing his head and eating it.
>>
>>217845709
>please, finish the books Martin
>there's no rush :)
>>
>>217845870
Write more than 2 books
Get help, have a ghost writer who you control the writing direction of while leaving to him the heavy work of the details and prose
Accept that a flawed story is better than an unfinished one and stop worrying about disappointing

George's ego is his greatest enemy, if he can't be hailed by everyone he'd rather not finish the story at all.
>>
>>217845870
I can't remember who said it but I remember someone saying that the way ASOIAF's been written and how GRRM's approached the story it's heading towards a Walker victory
>>
>>217845922
>you do not get immortality
>die
>>
>>217845890
One of his descendants is theorised to be the Mountain so he probably is malnourished
>>
>>217845925
>Get help
He has a married Scandi couple who could do it.
>>
>>217845928
>a Walker victory
LEMME ASK YOU SUMIN RICK
>>
>>217845849
Don't expect normal people to fuck tgeir siblings
>>
>>217845928
The ending will require Men to come to a diplomatic solution with the Walkers, it is hinted that the Starks did this a long time ago and were sacrificing babies or some shit to them the way Craster was.
>>
>>217845890
I imagine hes been a squire since he was fairly young, their diet logically was going from lords feasts to catching animals on the road to cook you could get pretty big doing that.
>>
>>217845906
So you were just pretending to be retarded.
>>
>>217845870
>>217845928
>>217845987
Are white walkers even a big thing in the books? Show built them up as the big bad final boss
>>
>>217845987
Would they accept dwarves?
>>
>>217845890
He ate other orphans.
>>
Baelor's actor look like a complete nerd in real life, but in the show the nigga looks like a king you would follow to thousand battles. Very good characterization.
>>
>>217845999
I read that as
>you could get pretty big dong
>>
>>217845870
it's really not that hard to resolve at all
>stannis- wins vs. the Boltons, sacrifices Shireen trying to beat the Others and dies
>Dany - resolves the situation in Mereen, sails to Westeros with Iron Fleet, fights the others, kills fAegon and burns KL in the process, dies
>Jon - helps beat the Others, probably voluntarily fucks off beyond the wall the bang Val
>Euron - is probably the guy who helps bring down the Wall, dies in the process of trying to become a god
people exaggerate how much there is to tie up, half the POVs can be killed off without impacting the plot
>>
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>>217846032
>Are white walkers even a big thing in the books?
Yes?
Not only they are in the first charpter but they are much cooler and more alien.
>>
>>217846072
You have to actually tie everything up
Build up to Dany burning KL
What does fAegon do? Does Cersei escape? What do the Tyrells do?
Littlefinger? Remember he still has Sansa?
Dorne, what do they do? Darkstar (unironically) what does he do with Dawn?
Tyrion is with penny, how does his character arc proceed? And Jaime's?
What happens to Samwell? Euron is sieging Oldtown.

One thing is knowing the general direciton of the plot and another thing entirely is writing it down
>>
so why aren't there any maesters anywhere?
>>
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>>217845987
aka Jon Snow ends up beyond the wall like he does in the show, except he's banging the White Walker queen instead of being a sad emo. The peace deal with the Others required a regular delivery of a Stark boy toy, Night's King did nothing wrong. The North doesn't remember
>>
>>217846047
Yeah ser arlan has that effect on me too.
>>
>>217846141
Lord Ashford has his maester I presume, but we have no reason to see him
>>
Anon unironically mentioned Darkstar
>>
>>217846147
Why does Jon want to fight them when he can just do this? Is he stupid?
>>
>>217846192
In his defence she's very bad at flirting.
>>
>>217846072
I think it's a timing thing. The way I see it is Stannis wins against the Boltons but
>loses regular soldiers because of shireen sacrifice
>loses red soldiers when dany invades claiming to be azor ahai
>gets killed by northmen angry about burning godswood
But to do that he needs Dany to reach Westeros and use res priests to shill her campaign. The same thing is probably happening with multiple characters. Unfortunately these characters are at different phases in their plots and some need more work than the others, which would need an extra book.
>>
>>217846032
they seemingly have motives and strategy in the books. They are basically herding the wildlings south and the only time they actively attack is when they get rumors of anybody who looks like a Stark, in which case they set up elaborate ambushes or huge attacks like with Waymar Royce and when Jon was supposed to be at the Fist of the First Men
>>
egg is a communist wigger blood magic tyrant dragoncel loser and im glad dunk killed him
>>
>>217845979
That's why it's a fun fantasy because it can be between people you want to see fucking.
See lesbians.
>>
>>217845834
Literally i think this is basically what it was, he was just thinking about arlan it wasn’t a literal flashback
>>
>>217846272
This was debunked.
>>
>>217846192
the knowledge was lost or misinterpreted. The prophecy is literally about "the prince who was promised", the prince who was promised to the Others as part of their peace deal. The "flaming sword" that ends the Long Night is jon's dick pounding the corpse queen in marriage, not a literal sword
>>
>>217846286
dedunked
>>
>>217846292
>The "flaming sword" that ends the Long Night is jon's dick pounding the corpse queen in marriage
How could have we been so blind....
>>
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>tfw targshits disappear and fossoway lives on forever
>>
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>I'm gonna be a daddy?
>>
>>217846192
>Is he stupid?
Worse. He is short and stupid!
>>
>>217846367
T-THAT'S NOT SHORT
THAT'S PERFECTLY NORMAL.
>>
>>217845812
Egg unleases and evil and it an epic battle he stop the demon with dunk, dying in the process
>>
>>217846323
The apple tree survives the winter in which the wheat perishes
>>
>>217845614
>>217845693
not that anon but maekar says he doesn't remember the blow that did it. very curious when we know we have a skinstealing megajew running around that just so happened to let his family all go absolutely insane and "self destruct"
>>
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>>217845890
He’s been a squire since he was six and arlan kept him fed and had him doing physical work for him (lugging armor, scouring mail, etc)
>>
>>217846420
kino
>>
>>217845259
Estimated survival rate of having your eyeballs boiled by a dragon?
>>
>>217845294
This line of questioning makes me extremely uncomfortable.
I take the Vaegonpill and fuck parchment instead.
>>
>>217846323
AN APPLE A DAY KEEPS THE DRAGON AWAY
>>
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I'm so starved of this series I'll even.. I'll even take a Dany charpter if necessary.
I know it sounds a bit extreme but I'm going to read it if George releases it.
>>
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Its gonna be shown that most of the big events are orchestrated and manipulated by Bloodraven and or Bran. Gonna laugh when it shows them doing it with the 1st Blackfyre rebellion
>>
>>217846397
>Dunk gets possessed by the great other (whats going to happen to Euron) like King Harald was by Imu
Hmmm very interesting. Still we need to account for how Dunks hand and a foot will save the kingdom and worth the life of a Prince
>>
Will Chuds turn on the show when Rohanne Webber and Daemon II are introduced?
>>
>>217845890
Bowl o' brown is a nutritional panacea.
All you need to do to grow up big and strong like Dunk is eat rats and people.
>>
>>217846506
Daemon II will be black so yes
>>
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>>217846496
At the very least we know Rhaegar and his mom were at Summerhall and we know “____would have died but for the valor of the lord comman____” so Dunk probably saves them from the flames
>>
>>217846506
Is Lady Webber going to be cast as a nigger since she is a red haired woman in the source material?
>>
>>217845870
>stannis gets killed by white walkers
>dany gets killed by jon
>jon becomes a wilding and marries val
>euron gets killed by either white walkers, asha, or vic
>>
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>>217846486
>Brynden and Brandon sitting in their sweaty fucking cave, slamming longnecks and gooning to rapes past, present, and future around which they have oriented all of world history
>>
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Back in the day ASOIAF and Halo were my favorite Zombie Media but they both turned to shit. Sad stuff
>>
>>217846397
>>217846496
Fuck I misread your post, I just saw the imagine and projected my own headcanon.
If a demon did manifest it would need a host I don't think it can be anyone but Egg. Know if it was egg who got possessed then the prophecy we get in the show makes more sense, all his loved ones are glad to se him burn and die and not be controlled by someone demon
>>
>>217846486
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yWvQ_X2sqqE
>>
>>217846496
I'm not sure if it'll be a straight up possession or something getting to big to control with some heroics preventing further losses
>>
>>217846486
>could have used coldhands to tell the Night's Watch they need dragonglass to kill Others decades ago
>does nothing but goon in his cave instead
only way this plot works is if the 3 eyed crow is genuinely evil and Bran and Bloodraven are just puppets. This is implied in Melisandre's vision. Would be kino if this eldritch being is just using the White Walkers as unwitting pawns to clear its path to the throne. Alternative is that bloodraven is just a complete brainlet
>>
>>217846506
The second blackfyre rebellion is just too sad, bros.
How could this happen to the bonnie prince.
>>
>>217846557
Most likely
>>
>>217846072
>>217846225
Stannis will win the Battle of Ice. Ramsay will collapse the great hall of Winterfell, killing all the Lords inside. Ramsay flees to the Dreadfort. Stannis stumbles back to the Wall and burns Shireen. Jon marches south and wins the Battle of the Bastards with his Wildling / Skagosi army.
>>
I hate the Blackfyres so fucking much it's unreal
>>
>>217846604
I thought Halo was aliens? Never had an Xbox
>>
>>217846637
>if the 3 eyed crow is genuinely evil
I'm 100% sure this is the case
Not straight up evil maybe but definetly furthering his own interests rather than humanity's
>>
>>217846637
That's the implication isn't it? The show confirms that the children of the forest created the white walkers which I imagine comes from GRRM, doesn't seem like the sort of thing that DnD would just create
>>
>>217846637
The great other killed everyone at summerhall
>>
>>217845683
>>217845748
must suck for the actor, apparently they filmed a lot of content but they ended up cutting all of it
>>
>>217846670
The Flood are scifi zombies
>>
>>217844693
The showrunner is somebody who thinks they're funny but isn't and I guess nobody on set has the balls to tell him.
>>
>>217845683
>Egg playing with an axe in the background
He's so cute
>>
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Everyone should have a best bro like this nigga, my god
>>
The fossoway squire is definitely dying but I hope he at least kills his cousin
>>
>>217845591
What the fuck did the incontinent pigeon have against dark haired targs?
Was he racist or something?
>>
>>217846729
I can't hate hotd no matter how much they shat the bed
It's just so memable
Aemondposting, lord beesbury, Daemonposting, THE RATCATCHERS.... I unironically can't wait for season 3 so we can merrily complain about every detail together
>>
>>217846755
He grows up to father the bad apple, who takes his father's niche political ideas to the extreme by building valyrian concentration camps in land held by the ninepenny kings.
>>
>>217846757
Some prophecy shit about Egg’s line
>>
>>217846788
The apple once sweet turned sour...
>>
>>217846755
Raymun is a Knight now and no rotten red apple or alien targ is gonna kill him
>>
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What the fuck was Baelor eating?

Got always has these food scenes where the characters are eating some finger food and it always looks delicious despite not being able to see what it is exactly. Reminds me of the scene where Tywin and Jaime are discussing Tyrions trial
>>
does anyone find dunc cute or is it just me
>>
>>217846805
Dates
>>
>>217845693
aSoiaF theorist think Bloodraven is behind everything.
>>
>>217846803
>alien targ
They're all aliens. This isn't earth
>>
Every time a character stands up mid monologue to pour themselves or their guest a drink, take a drink yourself
>>
>>217846821
>>217845693
Wow I truly wonder who could be behind these posts
>>
>>217846807
the actor moreso than the character, they kinda gave him a bad haircut just to avoid making him too attractive
>>
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>>217844693
I understand it being a turn off for some people but there is a bunch of juvenile humor in the books too. The Bracken humiliating him in front of everyone and kicking him when he's down makes Dunk's outburst of anger towards the crowd that much more believable. It's uncomfortable to watch because we feel bad for him and that all makes the final reveal that much more satisfying
>>
>>217846863
His actor's grown his hair out since. It wouldn't surprise me if Dunc started to look more comic accurate with the long shaggy hair in a second season
>>
>>217845870
>What happens to Stannis
Has to die to make way for fAegon and Dany's fight over the throne, I've seen a theory that he actually becomes the new Night's King but I hope that isn't true.

>What happens to Dany
Goes mad when fAegon is accepted as the rightful ruler over her and sets King's Landing on fire, Jon ends up plunging his sword through her heart.

>What happens to Jon
Goes North of the Wall, entreats with the White Walkers and reaches some kind of accomodation with them.

>Whats Euron's endgame?
In the Forsaken he shows the Damphair a vision of him on the Iron Throne with all the various Gods impaled on it and turning into a tentacled abomination.

Is currently in the process of a massive blood magic summoning. Summoning what is unknown, a Kraken perhaps?

Will end up getting killed by Samwell Tarly
of all people, as has been foreshadowed.
>>
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>>217846807
Yes
>>
Tyrion will be the first character to have met all 3 Targaryens still alive if winds of winter ever comes out
Not that it matters but its a neat detail
>>
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>>217846913
>>
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>>217846933
>>
>>217846419
>>217845693
>>217845906
>>217846821
>>217846848
>skinstealing megajew
Chudraven isn't that powerful. He's also a cuck
>>
THEY'RE INCESTUOUS ALIENS DUNK. BAN-EVADING SHITPOSTERS TROLLING OUR THREADS
>>
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>>217846947
He’s woke.
>>
>>217846807
mtn at best
height and physique carries him
>>
>>217846899
>Will end up getting killed by Samwell Tarly

Wut? Elaborate
>>
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What did GRRM mean by this?
>>
>>217846964
imagine caring
>>
>>217844498
>no shirt under chain mail
is he stupid
>>
I just realized Aerion's actor was the male cop on that terrible new season of True Detective and now I can't unsee it
>>
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>>217846777
>The ratcatchers! Idiot! The king is my grandson and my grandson is a fool. He’s worse than a fool: he’s murdered innocent men! And hanged them from the walls of the city for all to see! They are fathers and brothers and sons! And their wives and children gather now at our gates to weep and curse your name! With your child’s blood we bought their approval; with your mother’s tears we made a bitter sacrifice against the deprivations to come and you’ve thrown it away. After all I’ve done for you. Thoughtless. Feckless. Self-indulgent. Gods help us all! Instead of judgement you display impetuousness and diminish us in the eyes of our enemy. Ill-considered. Trifling. You never think of your father: his forbearance, his judiciousness, his dignity. He was right about you. Insolent pup.
>>
>>217844693
For better or for worse the show is a comedy. The joke was kinda shit but I think duncans response afterwards made up for it imo
>>
>>217846961
Skinstealing allows him to watch his girlfriend get fucked from many different angles.
>>
>>217846899
Stannis will win that battle by building a fake lighthouse and cracking the lake ice. He will die afterwards though
>>
>>217847001
He enjoys punishing his nipples
>>
>>217846988
Aerion is loyle to his future knig.
>>
>>217846961
Bittersteel is more of a cuck. Bloodraven at least hit, and then when he went full dark wizard she became his accomplice
>>
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>>217846977
they don't call him sam the slayer just for his fat pink mast beating up wildling pussy, oh and killing the Other is cool too i guess
>>
>>217846899
>Goes mad when fAegon is accepted as the rightful ruler over her and sets King's Landing on fire, Jon ends up plunging his sword through her heart.

Do you think its all a big misunderstanding, like he expects her to come to westeros and marry him but instead she just goes to westeros straight from mereen and starts burning KL?
>>
>the anvil was a rock / the hammer smashed the bastard with his giant veiny host
the implication here that maekar was rock hard watching baelor fuck daemon in the ass, of course
maekar cuck chair confirmed. daelor/daemon confirmed. big cock baelor confirmed
>>
>>217847065
I think he’ll marry Myrcella
>>
>>217846816
Fucking sandnigger dornigger
>>
>>217847065
Nta but I think it will be awkward
Aegon will want the marriage to be with him as true king, as he will be Aegon the conqueror, while Dany will want to be ruler instead because she gave birth to dragons.
But Aegon will tame a dragon and Dany will see it as "stealing" it and get very pissed.

Tyrion who in the books is more evil and pissed will intentionally stoke the flames until it ends in a miniature dance of dragons
>>
>>217845635
Ok but can we get more detail? Need to cum
>>
>>217844794
is there a reason this guy is such a little bitch that he wont fight him 1v1?
>>
>>217847110
Just wanted to spice things up for the audience I guess
>>
>>217847037
Stannis.. Moomins..
But what does it mean?
Stannis falling through the ice and waking up in Moominvalley?
Only an anon on /got/ could confound me so.
>>
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>>217845683
Sweet is the honey, sharp is the bite,
The bee still remembers who wronged it at night.
>>
>>217847110
Because he'd obviously lose, Dunk is huge
>>
>>217844997
At least he’s not Rothfuss and never grifted millions of dollars via his nonprofit under rhe promise of releasing new material. God, I hate that slimy fat kike Rothfuss
>>
>>217847110
Dunk is a big boy who needed like 5 guards to be stopped, and getting humiliated by a paesant is probably not something he desires.

His plan was simple: trial by 7, Dunk fails to get 6 madlads to fight, Aerion wins the trial skipping the combat.

Too bad Dunk did, indeed, find 6 other madlads.
>>
>>217847151
Can't he just have a kingsguard fight for him? Surely in the justice system of westeros a really big, dangerous guy can't get out of literally everything by demanding a trial by combat?
>>
>>217847137
Imagine if instead of a house with the stag or the lion getting the throne someone like the fossoways or the beesbury gets the throne and the royal sigil is a fucking apple or a beehive
>>
>>217847110
He's a bully. He wanted to prove Duncan had no friends before killing him. Applecunt was made a lord because he promised to raise men for him and by switching sides Dunk would've shown up completely alone.
>>
>>217847137
Who is the bee man?
>>
>>217847075
Why are Daerons partisans so gay?
Is it the Dornish influence?
I thought Eustace holding forth on Damo B's abs was suspect but these motherfuckers can't stop talking about cock.
>>
>>217847174
>Can't he just have a kingsguard fight for him?
He'd look like a huge pussy
Instead by invoking a trial by seven he looks like the cool Maegor larper
>>
>>217847152
I at least believe that GRRM writes something occasionally, despite the fact that he'll never finish another book. Rothfuss hasn't written a word in well over a decade.
>>
>>217847184
Stags are pretty fruity
>>
>>217847201
>He'd look like a huge pussy
He looks like a huge pussy invoking the trial by 7, even his own fucking dad said so immediately
>>
>>217847174
>Surely in the justice system of westeros a really big, dangerous guy can't get out of literally everything by demanding a trial by combat
The Brits only banned it in the 19th century because some murderer who everyone knew did it won a trial by combat.
>>
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Steely Pate is the only decent smallperson
>>
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>"BASTARDS could be here" she thought, "I've never been in this kingdom before. There could be BASTARDS anywhere." The cool wind felt good against her less than impressive chest. "I HATE BASTARDS" she thought. The House Tully theme reverberated her entire mule, making it pulsate even as the 9 silvers Arbor gold wine circulated through her thin varicose veins and washed away her (merited) fear of illegitimate offspring usurping their trueborn siblings. "With a mule, you can go anywhere you want" she said to herself, out loud.
>>
>>217847184
Would bee hard to beelieve but heraldry like that would be the apple of the realms eye
>>
>>217845503
That’s what the faith is for. All you need is a religious martyr and one competent general, ala Jan Hus and Jan Zizka.
>>
The idea of a trial by combat being something anyone can invoke whenever they're charged with something is really dumb, clearly impractical, and it's best to just avoid thinking about it too much
>>
Imagine your own dad calling you a faggot pussy
>>
>>217845569
Rabble of serfs btfo all the living dragons at the pit.
>>
Why do they make it seem like the targ dynasty was doomed after the dance? It seems like if Aerys II wasn’t a pycho the realm would have been very stable.
If anything it should be more stable after the dance because a rival targ with a dragon (like Daemon or rhaenys could have been) is the most dangerous thing that could happen
>>
>>217847241
It was a real thing in real life
>>
>>217847253
All Maekar does is call his sons pussies, that's why they all hate him
>>
>>217847214
Doesn’t he use the excuse that because Dunk is the “robber knight” that made off with Egg, his other brother deserves a crack at Dunk too? Or maybe its just in the book
>>
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>>217847110
He's too shy to wrestle with him alone he's scared everyone will see his pp get hard
>>
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>>217847193
>>
>>217847241
>>217847269
Not only it was a thing IRL but it was a thing they forgot existed and thus remained law until someone invoked it like, in the 1800s and it led to a very awkward legal situation as he was technically within his right
>>
>>217847193
He's Humphrey Beesworth. He joined because the guy with a broken leg, Humfrey Whatever had a great joust with him. Humphrey gained a lot of respect for Humphrey and was pissed off when the prince killed his horse, so he's joined in for his honour.
>>
>>217847184
At least king Bee wouldn't be fated by heraldic determinism to get cuckolded and cause a massive civil war UNLIKE SOME OTHER HOUSES I DON'T CARE TO NAME
>>
>>217847267
The Targ dynasty was unstable after the Dance, because they now had to politic like every other house while also being seen as foreign incestuous conquerors
>>
THAT
>>
>>217847267
Because without dragons the Targs, as mostly mad foreign occupiers, are much more vulnerable to internal rebellion, which is exactly what ends up happening
>>
>>217847196
cock > cunt and every dornishman knows it
>>
>>217847293
(farts)
>>
>>217847193
this
>>217845683
>>217845748
>>
>>217847296
They're also brothers-in-law I think
>>
>>217847241
If you go back and look at medieval and early modern manuals of arms they were often written by people who either worked as judicial champions or made a living training people to fight in trials by combat, or both.
>>
>>217847267
Because westeros is the size of south america and full of kingdoms who could easily declare independence and never have any issue defending themselves like the Vale or Dorne.

The reason everyone stays loyal is because there is no reason to rebel and wage war, it's simply to inconvenient. But its a matter of time: the moment there is a reason for it, someone will start a civil war and its all downhill from there
>>
>>217847241
>is really dumb, clearly impractical,
It's great actually.
At least when it comes to squabbles of nobles.
If you as a judge/lord make a decision you are going to piss off one side inevitably. If they just go with trial by combat, then it's not your problem anymore and nobody blames you for the outcome. Also makes legal proceedings much cheaper and simpler.
>>
Why did all the dragons die though, like for real? Obviously a bunch died during the dance but why did they become sickly and die out afterwards? Are there any theories other than the maester conspiracy?
>>
Could one realistically support Bloodraven’s reign while also hating Targs and being team Green? Leyton gonna laser that Johnny Depp wannabe.
>>
>>217847439
Lack of blood sacrifice magic bullshit to recharge the Targs firey blood cult battery. Took Summerhall to start recharging it so that Dany could eventually hatch some chorogons.
>>
>>217847443
I have no consistent way of rooting, I just support whatever, usually the underdog.
>>
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Ser Pounce desires a new thread
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>>217847439
Plosion by the grey rats is the main theory but I guess the official narrative could be true. Keeping them in the dark underground made them smaller and weaker each generation until they just died from being sickly.
>>
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>Rhae Targaryen prepares her nameday present for Aegon
>>
>>217847443
Bloodraven also hates targs (most prolific kinslayer in history) and helps put a male with broken legs on the throne over a female Targaryen
>>
>>217847439
A bunch of knowledge was lost in the doom of Valyria and keeping dragons became unsustainable. We also don't know if magic in the world is what allows for dragons or if the dragons bring the magic
>>
>>217847296
>>
>>217846977
Whales in a song of Ice and Fire are referred to as Leviathans, which get called the natural predators of Krakens on at least one occasion in the series.

Euron is headed to where Sam is currently, Sam gets insulted and called a Leviathan for his size by Leo Tyrell, and at one point (a Davos chapter I think) attention is drawn to a painting in which a Leviathan and a Kraken are locked in a battle to the death.

Also, for those who believe in Ragnarok theory, I'd note that in Ragnarok it's Heimdall the Hornblower who kills Loki. Sam currently has the horn of winter and is from horn hill.
>>
>>217847533
We have no idea how it is going to play out
>>
>>217847439
I always thought the young ones died off and the older ones fucked off. Alysanne's dragon lived through the Dance but decided she didn't want to be around the Targs anymore and just vanished into the wilderness
>>
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>>217847533
Based protector of the realm
>>
>>217847545
Egg basedfacing during the jousts is hilarious, that actor is great
>>
>>217847574
Go bomb a Palestinian dayare, you psycho.
>>
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>>217847296
Humfrey Hardyng
>>
>>217847439
They didn't just lose most dragons, but also the secret knowledge of dragon care. It clearly involves magic to some degree and is connected to the Dragonstone volcano.

Aegon III hated dragons and might have been involved in getting rid of them. It does not take a Maester conspiracy when the king himself hates dragons.

It's also possible the genes for dragon bonding were lost or weakened. The line continues via Viserys II and his children with a Lysene noblewoman.
There are two possible problems with him:
1. Maybe he was not actually Viserys, but a Lysene imposter
2. His wife has Targaryen features, but obviously no dragonrider genes

Just because someone looks like a Targaryen does not mean they actually are Targaryen. Using the pale blonde hair and purple eyes to identify the most "pure" Targaryens is based on a lack of understanding about genetics. The Velaryion marriages might have had the same negative effect.
>>
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>>217847596
>>
>>217847658
Isn't this Aemond? (He would bomb the palestinian daycare too but without the pretense of doing it for the realm)
>>
>>217847695
You’re right that is Aemond brb going to commit sepuku
>>
THEY'RE INCESTUOUS ALIENS, DUNCAN
>>
>>217846486
>bloodraven is a good boi
>bran is a crazy rapist who undoes millenia of work
>>
>>217847744
Deportation is not enough at this point Duncan, the crimes of Valyria can only be washed with blood
>>
>>217847744
Don't the houses practice avunculate and cousin marriages too
Do they really have any leg to stand on with the incest thing
>>
>>217847849
>comparing the occasional cousin marriage and rare uncle-niece marriage to centuries of marrying brothers and sisters whenever possible
nice cope targshit
>>
>>217847849
What is with Valyrians and not understanding per capita? Genuinely, it's not that hard
>>
>>217847522
My friends a twin and he said him and his sister would fondle each other when it was just them at home. Then in highschool she didn't want to anymore because she could get other dudes to do it kek
>>
>>217847849
Sibling marriages are much worse when it comes to the negative effects of incest.
Not that they cared much for genetics. Their religion said it was bad, so they thought it was bad as well.
>>
>>217847515
What's the rundown on the rat theory?
>>
>>217845979
We've all done it at some point. Just don't get her pregnant. She might want to keep it.
>>
>>217847922
Maesters want a world ruled by science, logic, and reason. Magic - represented by dragons - stands in the way of that, so they killed them.
>>
>>217847922
Maesters fucking hate magic that is not under their controls and the targaryens and so they poisoned the dragons and stirred the pot at every chance they ever had.
>>
>>217847882
>Targs marry brother to sister and sometimes uncle to niece
>But never parent to child or aunt to nephew
>No older dragon rider tomboy aunt he /ss/ her nephew for the good of the realm to have heirs
For shame George.
>>217847922
Grey Rats is the maester theory, they poisoned the dragons and their connection to the high towers means they may have helped to cause the dance
>>
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>>217847922
Targshits blame the maesters for poisoning their dragons and the eggs. Which would be their own fault for trusting the people who hate magic to help them hatch dragons in the first place. Main reason they failed is because Baelor the Blessed burned pretty much all the Targs books on magic, so in reality it's simply the Targs being self-destructive retards and blaming others for their failure
>>
>>217847962
>No older dragon rider tomboy aunt he /ss/ her nephew
This treatment is reserved for small Arryn shotas
>>
>>217847849
Yes. It's based on European marriage, which comes from Papal law which comes from Roman custom. The church forbade (more like discouraged) cousin marriage to homogenise European ethnicities. Commoners like us view cousin marriage as incest but nobility could oppose the church, so it's less immoral to them. Sibling incest is wrong to both though.
>>
>>217847065
>>217847099
Doubt the fat man will actually do this now.
>>
>>217846988
>thinks he’s a dragon
>because since birth he’s been treated like a pet, given “sit” and “bark” commands
Litoratore
>>
>>217847987
Quite a few 13-14 year old girls get married with the intention of having kids asap.
Its probably more ethical for a 14 year old boy to impregnate a grown woman than a 14 year old girl to be impregnated by an adult man. And it only makes sense to pair off a 14 year old with a fertile woman to make kids if its the targs
>>
how did dragons evolve bro explain that you can 't
>>
>>217848115
it's valyrian blood magic i ain't gotta explain shit
>>
>>217848115
They didn't, they are of magical nature, not biological one.
>>
>>217848115
Valyrian bloodmages crossbred slaves with firewyrms and other creatures found in the depths of their volcanic mines.

The gods punished the freehold for its crimes by unleashing the Fourteen Flames on them.
>>
>>217848115
Artificial species created by Targ blood magic experiments cross-breeding firewyrms and wyverns
>>
>wOt If DuNk DeCiDeS tO bE a KnIgHt AnD tHeN wE cUt To HiM tAkInG a ShIt?
>>
How would you try and revive the dragons? Blood and fire?
>>
The shit scene filtered so many
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>>217848184
I wouldn't, I'm not a mad incestous alien invader
>>
>>217848177
kino, also checked
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>>217848184
I'd wait for a shooting star before doing my fucked up blood sacrifice because all the blood sacrifices prior to Dany didn't work
>>
>>217848184
apparently they were created so I would recreate them
>>
>>217848184
obviously human sacrifice, fire, incestuous sex
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>>217848184
drink wildfire
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>>217848336
>>217848336
>>217848336
>>
>>217848184
Invasion of Valyria of course. Wait for steam engine tech tree to be reached.
>>
>>217846807
He looks better with the longer hair in more recent photos. Really nice eyes too.



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