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What could have been edition

Previous: >>218443332
>>
Dunk kind of ruined hotd for me, I can't go back to anxiety-inducing drama after all that. Also S2 was very, very boring.
>>
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>>218456711
TAOOBA!
>>
We're all gonna make it, frens! Just two more books.
>>
>>218456711
Gender bending which character in Asoiaf would fix the story?
>>
What of the other thread?
>>
>>218456861
Unironically Robert, because (s)he'd have been married off to Rhaegar due to having closert Targ ancestry than Elia
>>
>>218456865
This one has dubs and is older. It is the One True Thread, all who oppose it are its foes.
>>
>>218456784
>This art has me thinking, would ASOIAF be more better as a light novel series?
On the off chance that grrm manages to shit out twow I'd could very well be a light novel, because his brain has degraded too much.
>>
>>218456858
>two
Considering GRRM believed GoT could go on to 10 seasons and seasons 5~8 where winds + dream. It means those two books have as much going on as previous four books combined
>>
>>218457017
at his peak aka storm of swords, he wrote one not two or 3 or 4 but five complete and satisfying story arcs that concluded. He would have to do it again in winds and i don't think he's got it in him
>>
>>218457046
He set up so much arcs should start to conclude in winds
>>
>>218457077
thats what I'm saying storm satisfactorily concluded everything got and clash set up, ow he has to do the same again and I just don't think he can do it anymore
>>
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>start reading fanfiction where Theon was born a woman
>expect self-insert smut
>it’s actually a TOTAL STANNIS VICTORY scenario
holy fucking based, this is my new canon now since it’ll actually get finished
>>
>>218457123
Sow the Tide, Reap the Storm ?
>>
>>218457141
Yeah
>>
>>218457146
Honestly I went in expecting a North victory scenario.

As a Stannis fan I was instead far from disappointed
>>
>>218457123
Why is femTheon brown
>>
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>>218457046
>cut fAegon
>cut all the ironnigger shit
>cut the sparrows
>cut lady stoneheart
>merge dorne with another jaime's storyline similar to the show
>cut dany trying to rule meereen, instead have her build an army with the goal of invading westeros
>>
>>218457183
At least it's not that artist who depicts Sansa as white while Arya is brown (and them both wearing Sami-looking clothing)
>>
>>218457123
is there actual smut in it though?
I think i want a text boner
>>
Sex with Arya Stark!
>>
>>218457141
What happens to Edmure?
>>
>>218457212
Instant Loss with Arya Stark and her fat ass
>>
>>218457212
Jon...
>>
>>218457214
He's depicted as the lore accurate gigachad who is possibly the sole Westerosi noble to give a shit about the smallfolk.
>>
>>218457191
dany becoming the great khal over the entire dothraki hundreds of thousands is clearly going to happen in the book as well
>>
>>218457183
Tumblr obsession with brown washing. Female Theon is just supposed to have long black hair and hooked nose
>>
>>218457225
based all i needed to pick it up after reading "TOTAL STANNIS VICTORY"
>>
>>218457212
Your favourite rape fanfic, your grace?
>>
>>218457245
>Female Theon is just supposed to have long black hair and hooked nose
So presuming she also lacks a cock, what is the difference between FemTheon and canon Theon?
>>
>>218457245
>>218457214
He's with his Frey girl. Still not the brightest but he tries
>>
>>218457264
Fat-Bottomed Starks
>>
>>218457242
Yes but the fat fuck doesn't know how so he might as well just make her use the dragons to burn the other khals and take their riders within a few chapters
>>
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>>218457271
I can't unsee pic related in that art
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>>218457285
They'll be asphyxiated when they find her squatting in the tent, groaning
>>
>>218457265
I think Theon tried much harder to prove to the Ironborn that he was a worthy heir to Balon, while female Theon was never the heir, being the younger girl, and didn't have that kind of pressure, which shifted the dynamic a bit. Also being a woman you don't have the same expectations put on you of course.
But female Theon is also sardonic, cruel, insecure and vain, much like Theon.
>>
>>218457191
Also cut down the PoV bloat. There's no need for 3 PoV characters in Dorne and another 3 in the Iron Islands.
>>
>>218457123
How does Theon relate to Stannis winning at any point before the Battle in the ice?
>>
i don't like the fandom revision that Ned did nothing wrong in the capital in the first book/season and that everyone going wrong for him was either bad luck or unforeseeable
it's pretty obvious when you read the second book that everyone in the capital thought Ned was not very good at political compromise and minigames, and his refusal to see Cersei as a real threat was baffling

granted that there ARE some contrivances involved but if Ned was good at politics he could've navigated them much better, he had the opportunities but threw them away
>>
>>218457091
>thats what I'm saying storm satisfactorily concluded everything got and clash set up, ow he has to do the same again and I just don't think he can do it anymore
At the end of Storm there were still a lot of plot threads open: Everything to do with Jon, Stannis and Bran. Instead of working towards their conclusion as well the series suddenly bloated up in the middle and added like a dozen more plots/POVs.

Removing the five year gap was the single biggest error in all of this. The only characters that would have a problem with a time jump like that are Stannis and Davos, but I feel those are solvable problems.
>>
>>218457205
Just a couple of scenes, and it's usually female centric. Ironically this is the weakest thing about the fic
>>
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>>218457339
I was mostly making a "no cock" joke worthy of the smartest character of Season 8, but yeah that makes sense
>>
>>218457398
Ironborn invasion of the North kicks off later and goes worse because FemTheon (Quenlyn) doesn't take Winterfell, while once Balon dies Asha, Quenlyn and Victarion manage to unite and thus have the single braincell required to avoid Euron getting the crown, instead agreeing to Asha's 'ally with the North' plan from the books.

Which means Quenlyn goes back to Winterfell (to be married to Robb for the alliance) only for Ramsay to pull a delayed sack and thus she escapes with Bran, Rickon and the Reeds, getting to Castle Black...and thus into the hands of Stannis and giving him the ability to force the Ironborn and the North to accept him as King.
>>
>>218457404
>The only characters that would have a problem with a time jump like that are Stannis and Davos, but I feel those are solvable problems.
My conspiracy theory is the reason he dropped the 5 year gap is he fucked up by having Balon die already in Storm and realised he couldn't work out how to keep the Ironborn plotline on hold for 5 years.
>>
>>218457404
obviously there were still things unresolved but it concluded many arcs, jon was lord commander, bran had reached BR, stannis had an army and was at castle black etc. yes deciding not to do the time jump was a big mistake
>>
Do you fear the jaennys will discover one day that we don't actually talk about television and movies here?
>>
>>218457487
If they do, Hiroshima Nagasaki might double, nay, even triple, their wages
>>
>>218457205
>>218457413
Shame, Female Theon is built for something like >>218457219
>>
>>218457436
Sorry I didn't watch past season 4
>>
>>218457510
Doesn't make you interesting or cool
>>
>>218457399
>hey look lets quickly take cersei and kids into "protective custody" and establish you as regent then write my brother at dragonstone we need to do this right now!
>huh no thats dishonorable
>the fuck is wrong with this guy? ok i'm out wtf?
ned was a fucking idiot
>>
>>218457339
Is female Theon as misogynistic as male Theon?
>>
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>>218457510
>Sorry I didn't watch past season 4
>>
>>218457520
>>218457521
A tale of two anons
>>
>>218457520
Asha doesn't try and secretly fuck her at the very least, iirc
>>
I've actually spent quite some time lately to think about how Stannis can do a five year time jump. He's the only character who can not just sit around. He has limited resources and needs to act fast and decisive to keep him in the game. And I think I found the solution:

You sometimes see maps that portray Ceasar's conquest of gaul as a big circular campaign (pic related). That's not actually how it went with Ceasar, but we can give something like that to Stannis: He starts at Castle Black and marches down the west coast of the North, freeing it from Ironborn and winning allies and respect. Then he goes south to fuck the Dustins and take Moat Cailin, cutting of Frey resupply. Then he swings around the east coast and ravages Bolton lands. The story picks up again with him finally marching on Winterfell. You can actually have him exactly like he is now: His mixed army is freezing and starving, about to face a decisive battle.

Five years might be stretching it, but you can have him be a strong general for maybe three years while the other characters grow up.
>>
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wtf
Isn't she too old for Helena's child?
>>
>>218457599
They're aging her up with no explanation because she's replacing Maelor
>>
>>218457219
>>218457509
>Instant Loss
What is this supposed to mean? Speak English retards
>>
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>>218457621
https://desuarchive.org/aco/thread/7999371
>>
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>Rape acts in Game of Thrones the TV series (to date): 50
>Rape victims in Game of Thrones (to date): 29

>Rape acts in ASOIAF the book series (to date): 214
>Rape victims in ASOIAF (to date): 117

https://tafkarfanfic.tumblr.com/post/119770640640/rape-in-asoiaf-vs-game-of-thrones-a-statistical (May 24th 2015)

Please note that the author rounds gangrapes to be 10 victims or 10 acts, so it's not an exact count.
>>
>>218457520
She's torn between disliking Sansa for being too girly and being vain herself
>>
>>218456882
>Ned actually hates Rhaegar this time despite no Rebellion
>>
first episode of s3 will be a musical that ends with an explicit sex scene between alicent and rhaenyra
>>
>>218457676
I am sure the Mountain and his boys are responsible for like a third of them
>>
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>>218457676
>Danaerys Targaryen: raped by Drogo multiple times
>Slave prostitute: raped by Tyrion
>Taena Merryweather: raped by Cersei
yeah all right okay
>>
>>218455646
>I think its probably something like only five cities are considered "officially" cities, with a charter and everything, while there's plenty of big towns that normally would be city sized but not called it.
Presumably charters enable growth by freeing the lords of the cities from the obligation of levying men from them, be allowed to maintain a militia/city guard, have actual forifications/gates, some sort of improved trade/market/economic rights, etc. Things that more or less prevent them from reaching the size of even White Harbor or Gulltown if they don't have them.
>>
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>>218457676
>Farlen entered limping, struggling to support his daughter Palla. Her dress had been ripped in two; she held it up with a clenched fist and walked as if every step were agony. Septon Chayle rushed to lend a hand, but one of the ironmen knocked him to the floor.
>>
>>218457676
this sniveling fag better never read alan moore
>>
>>218457760
Yes, sex with slaves should be considered rape because unlike whores they don’t have choice
>>
>>218456861
Sansa because then she wouldn’t be a dumb bitch who spills Neds plan to cersei
>>
>>218457931
>unlike whores they don’t have choice
What's their alternative to make money and survive if they have no marketable skills? Manual labor? lol
>>
>>218457958
How most women survived in known history?
>>
>>218457993
Sex?
>>
>>218458008
Sex with one man*
>>
crazy that Cat was all like I need to spend every moment next to Brann, i cant allow myself to go to sleep and then he gets fucking assassin sent to kill him and only survives because of her being there which makes her go "OK I guess I can fuck off from here forever"

You'd think having her worst nightmare come true would make her glued to him even harder.

Sending Theon would've been much more useful.
>>
>>218458027
and that man's name is?
>>
>>218458078
Her husband whom she married and works with him on a field and looks after their home and children. Whore like to subvert that by getting paid for sex
>>
>>218458027
>Sex with one man*
less than half of the historic human male population reproduced btw
>>
>>218458122
Yes, because quite often one guy will have multiple wives. And because women are whooooores that have bastards
>>
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>>218456711
There's something enticing about Rule 63 fanart.
>>
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>>218458148
A lot of men died young
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>>218458027
I unironically believe promiscuous women's sub-conscious and nervous system thinks their tribe has been conquered, which is where a lot of modern mental illness in women comes from
>>
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>>218456711
>>
>>218458323
wtf is wrong with the fandom?
>>
>>218458228
>individual 71
That will be the fate of many americans fighting for Isn'tReal.
>>
>>218458228
why did he do it bros?
>>
Imagine getting married to Targ and she has fucking brown hair lmao
>>
>>218457123
I appreciate your copypasting my post on /lit/.
It’s odd how taken I am by that fanfic, it is truthfully not great yet I check everyday for the new chapter (Sansa, unfortunately). Haven’t done that since the height of Harry Potter.
>>
>>218458191
more hot girls than you started with, it’s not that mysterious
>>
>>218458323
>>218456711
How does this change things, if at all? She’s never gonna be the heir and she presumably dies in the spring still.
>>
>>218458504
I guess that's why it was done, it's an useless son so might aswell be a cute girl to project feelings on
>>
Unironically, what is holding up the release of twow is grrm beeing alive. As soon as he dies his publisher will sell us whatever chapters and outlines are lying around.
>>
who has the smallest cock
>>
>>218458517
>implying there are any
>>
>>218458517
>>218458543
I think on the contrary that there might be 10 different versions of the first few chapters of twow. Georges might however destroy them
>>
Roose was so based for this.
>>
>>218458430
I think it's because it has successfully managed to craft an alternate history that is plausible, all the while maintaining the tension in its main love story by not whitewashing the main character.
>>
>>218457123
>>218458430
>>218458692
>reading female protagonist fiction
>>
>>218456865
Take heart beesbury. Jannie are forbid to take any kind of currency.
>>
>GOT: dumb writers trying to write for intelligent characters: flops
>DUNK: dumb writers trying to write for retarded characters: masterpiece
kek
>>
How come he's so chill?
>>
>>218457191
Slop of the highest caliber.
>>
>>218458736
It's a good insight on female psychology
>>
>>218458798
>you can just read to understand women
haha thank you for the laugh
>>
Is woman the Great Other to men?
>>
>>218458798
>women have minds
Topkek
>>
>>218457123
but is it self-insert smut too?
>>
>best post-season 4 moment is a rip-off of the climax of The Godfather
What did they mean by this?
>>
>>218458917
I think there's like 3 sex scenes in 450k word, and the main character is a pretty terrible person
>>
>>218459026
>and the main character is a pretty terrible person
checks out, there are two types of female self-inserts: blank doormat or terrible personality-wise
>>
>>218459122
Tbqh, Theon was already a worthless cunt, making him a woman won't change him for the better.
>>
>>218457482
>bran had reached BR
Hahaha no. I'm as shocked as you are.
>>
>>218458974
Jenny of Oldstones montage??
>>
>>218459203
>Theon was already a worthless cunt
yes but now that it's a woman it's not a worthless cunt but a useful one, big difference
>>
>>218459403
>a useful one
It's probably blown out
>>
>>218459415
In the fic female Theon had sex with Waymar Royce when he stopped in Winterfell on the way to the Wall and he lives, so if anything she has magic lips.
>>
>>218457837
Tf is wrong with you
>>
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>new media released
>blacks have 4 legs
>Aegon has 2
>>
>>218459875
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0SfrIc-jkgA
that reminds me of this video
>>
>>218459914
glidus stop promoting your shit, you gay boy
>>
>>218459875
The top looks objectively better. I don't know what the fat fuck is seething about.
>>
>>218457705
>Ned and Robert still fuck but this time it's a bigger deal
>>
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>>218459997
the dragons dont have 4 legs and it makes the logo even more cluttered than it already is
2 legs is better
>>
>>218459997
because dragons have two legs. You don't see any sigils with 6 or 8 legged horses because we know how horses look. Targs also know how many legs their dragons have
>>
>>218457518
>Later on goes to a slimy dishonorable creep and enlists the corrupt toad to help him out with his half-assed coup
>>
>>218460028
>>218460033
Two legs look like chickens.
>>
wild reading this first book that's almost all just Starks (+3 tyrion and dany) and then later books are just Greyjoys
>>
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>>218460083
4 legs look like cows
>looks like a chicken
NO WAY ANON really? its almost like animals that have the same ability to fly have a similar build
whats next? horses and lions look alike because they have 4 lets?
>>
>>218460033
maybe drag-ons have 2 legs, because they're the trannies of the monster world, but dragons have four legs wyverns have 2, and wyrms have none.
>>
>>218458772
>handsome, smart
>lives in literal garden of eden castle
>crippled so he can just spend his time reading books and actually learning how to be a lord instead of going out to fight and kill himself (plus garlan and loras serve that purpose)
>all the girls want him due to being the heir of highgarden and the paramountcy of the reach
it's not difficult to imagine why
>>
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Some guy on Reddit compilated a bunch of HOTD season 3 set leaks

https://www.reddit.com/r/HouseOfTheDragon/comments/1rqyt32/recent_set_leaks/
>>
>>218460270
That's a huge dragon dick
>>
>>218458772
>How come he's so chill?

Because Willas Tyrell is the one actually calling the shots in the Reach, with the rest of the family playing along and letting Mace Tyrell think he's in charge.
>>
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>>218456861
Aerion.
She either Gets to /ss/ Egg or get fixed by Dunk.
Genderbender fics are ofthen worthy of the best fapfolders.
>>
>>218456882
Rhaegar would still spreg out and kidnap Lyanna because Bloodraven is beaming retarded ideas into his brain
>>
People ironically and unironically argue that Bloodraven has done a million things by mind controlling people. Killing Baelor, killing Jeor Mormont, etc.

But these theories rarely explain WHY he (supposedly) did what he did. What is Blodravens endgame?
>>
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I wish GRRM never even wrote Bloodraven into the story. Jesus Christ.
>>
Series overall quality tanked with the Feast storyline bloat and Bloodraven addition
>>
>>218460523
Reading R+L fanfics
>>
>>218460523
>What is Blodravens endgame?
everything is supposed to go like in books, so Bloodraven is arranging everything to be like that. Therefore every single event could be argued as Bloodraven action
>>
>>218460033
wyverns have two legs, dragon deez nuts have four
>>
>>218460523
1. Kill Brackens
2. Kill Blackfyres
>>
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>>218460523
>What is Blodravens endgame?

Bloodraven (and his replacement Bran) is Gurm's version of Leto the God Emperor who is using his magical abilities to insure humanity defeats the Others.
>>
>>218457399
>i don't like the fandom revision that Ned did nothing wrong in the capital in the first book/season and that everyone going wrong for him was either bad luck or unforeseeable
isn't he constantly made fun of for being a naive honortard way out of his depth?
>>
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>>218454674
>Is supposed to be this skilled warrior and he jobs in his first battle. Is there a bigger fraud than Daemon Blackfyre?
he literally won his duel, nobody said he was a great commander how is his warrior card even a question
>>
>>218460523

Bloodraven will use Bran to kill fAegon (who is a real Blackfyre) to wipe out the bastard line forever.
>>
>>218461107
> who is a real Blackfyre
Speaking about Faegon, there was earlier drafts in one library. There was part about Aegon studying history and argued for Blackfyre right on the throne because they were through male line.
George clearly realized that this one part screamed about Faegon being Blackfyre so he had to remove it so it’s “ambiguous”
>>
Now that the dust as settled, we can all recognise that the ending of /got/ was fine and on par with the rest of the post-Stannis' death episodes (i.e. nothing special, just serviceable). Normalscum don't care about the writing, the only thing they object to is Dany burning Kingslanding (which is completely in character for her).
>>
>and on par with the rest of the post-Stannis' death episodes (i.e. nothing special, just serviceable)
You overestimate the quality of seasons 5-8.
>which is completely in character for her
Don't start with this shit.
>>
>>218461320
Ending cannot be worse than “”””””long””””””” night episode, that’s for sure
>>
>>218460523
He is Preston Jacobspilled. He seethes at the First Men and Andals and wants the Salty Dornish, Dothraki and the many other Essosi nations to spill into Westeros while he watches from the trees.
>>
>>218460523
Ask Bittersteel's skull.
>>
>>218461354
>The entitled psycho woman who wants to be worshipped and regularly threatens to burn down cities ... burned down a city because she was angry the people in Westeros didn't worship her like her brown slaves!?
Woah
>>
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>Or I can turn over and you can pretend I am him
How often do you hear this from women?
>>
>>218457123
>>218457141
thats the one with the bisexual girltheon whsoe in love with Robb
>>
>>218457123
still angry the Stannis/Azula fic is full of OC's, skips over their first meeting and barely has them interacting despite being married
>>
>>218461516
Anal sex with medieval hygiene just sounds unpleasant
>>
>>218461440
She literally did nothing worse than burn the worst cunts in existence and then style on some Lannisters levies and Tarly bros. There was no reason for her to be mad at the city rather than Cersei who actually killed her best friend.
>>
>>218461628
>She literally did nothing worse
Prior to that, i mean.
>>
>>218461609
yeah, totally not unpleasant in the modern day
>>
>>218461628
She goads her rapist pedophile husband into sacking cities so she can get their rape gangs over to Westeros, she burns her slave Mirri Mazdur alive despite him being a veg being 100% her (and Jorah's) fault. Those "worst guys alive" are slavers, just like she was and just like Jorah was.
>>
>>218461648
uhh enemas & lube?
>>
>>218461770
>>
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Beyond the Wall... home.
>>
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>>218461782
>he dribbles cum
>>
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>>218461819
It comes out in lumps like creamy cottage cheese
>>
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>>218461851
>>
>Daemon B typically ranks below Selmy, Jaime, Dayne

Dayne’s greatest combat feat
>big murder knight
Selma’s greatest combat feat
>big dumb mutant murder knight
Jaime’s greatest combat feat
>some unwashed north men?
Daemon B’s greatest combat feat
>lord commander of the kingsguard with a magic sword

don’t understand how this world works
>>
>>218461698
>She goads her rapist pedophile husband into sacking cities so she can get their rape gangs over to Westeros
All for the greater good.
>she burns her slave Mirri Mazdur alive despite him being a veg being 100% her (and Jorah's) fault. Those "worst guys alive" are slavers, just like she was and just like Jorah was
Yeah whatever, i'm not gonna cry crocodile tears for those animals.
>>
>>218461899
jaime is literally only up there cause of george
>>
>>218461320
No it was shit; even if you forget how illogical everything was the last two episodes had barely any dialogue. Watching her burn that city actually got boring.
Also listening to Greyworm in those episodes was even worse than listening to Sansa. The Jon ending would have gone down better if the entire country hadn’t been bullied into it by that asshole they should have just had Arya kill him.
Oh, and Asha and Sam get a seat on the council great council, lol
>>
>>218461320
>a crippled kid getting chosen king because “muh stories” was fine
If you’re retarded maybe.
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....semoc eH
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>>218461899
At least Selmy has quite a bit of combat experience too.
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>>218461899
personally think Dayne and Jaime’s standing is mostly dependent on the word of mouth from people like Selmy
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The more I read about the Faith of the Seven, the less it seems like the Christianity stand-in that GRRM thinks it is. I'm honestly convinced that Martin barely knows anything about Christianity, let alone what it was during the Middle Ages, or if he does, he decided to make the Christianity stand-in based on the fringe cult offshoots of it.
Seriously, what kind of Christianity stand-in follows these concepts:
- Extremely skeptical or hostile toward magic and miracles
- Has no prophets or apostles that have prophetic visions or heal people
- No messiah figure or god-like entity that walks with humanity and will return to save humanity
- Lacks a Devil or evil demonic entity that contrasts the Messiah figure
- No cosmology or creation narrative. The Seven literally just show up to a bunch of Andals.
- No death or resurrection that symbolizes atonement

And it goes on. The weirdest part is how GRRM describes the Faith of the Seven as one god that appears through seven aspects, like an analogy of a prism: one light passing through a crystal to create seven colors. That's literally modalism. No devout Christian would describe the Trinity as several aspects, roles, or masks like the Seven.

Seriously, the Faith of the Seven is essentially a disenchanted religion that only seems like Christianity in organizational structure. The Seven act more like manifestations of moral order and social roles that represent human roles instead of being several distinct persons who are in a constant, eternal relationship with one another but still one substance. The Faith of the Seven is one of the most secular religions I've read in fiction that somehow convinces many it's not.
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>>218462001
>The first cousin of one high lord, nephew of another and brother to a third gets chosen. One who is sterile, meaning it is a guaranteed non dynastic appointment
Woah..
>>
>>218462001
>he still hasn't realized bran chose himself to be king
>>
>>218462063
That’s cause it’s a red herring and just there to mock the popery in the Vatican

The real Christianity stand in is the Lord of Light
>But that’s way more evil and closer to worshipping the devil
Correct
>>
>>218458070
Tullys and logic aren't close friends most generations, but it's scary when they are
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>>218456711
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>>218460523
lol what a retarded character and concept
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>>218462077
>He follows the wrong religion in a very religious society.
>He has negative charisma.
>He's from a family nobody in the South gives two shits about.
>His family just helped destroy King's Landing.
>On top of this he is elected King during a trial for treason that had like a dozen lords at, 90% of them being Stark family or loyalists.
>Pushed for it for a treasonous kinslaying dwarf
Yeah no. Fuck off.
>>
>>218462158
>What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bastard? I’ll have you know I was knighted first out of all the squires in the Red Keep, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Blackfyre usurpers, and I have over 300 confirmed slayings. I am trained in Dornish warfare and I’m the top archer in all the Southron kingdoms. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will snuff out your bastard bloodline with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that rubbish to me with a raven’s letter? Think again, bastard. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the Seven Kingdoms and all of your traitorous secrets will be revealed so you better prepare for the storm, turncloak. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your “life”. You’re fucking dead, boy. My cousin Lord Bloodraven can be anywhere, anytime, and he can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with Dark Sister. Not only is my house extensively seasoned in the art of warfare, but we have access to the entire arsenal and martial talent of the Kingsguard, the Goldcloaks, and all the leal Great Houses of the Realm and we will use them to their full extent to wipe your bastard’s ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the iron price, you godsdamned idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it, like we drowned your false king Daemon in a rain of arrows on the Redgrass Field. You’re fucking dead, bastard.
>>
>>218462063
>I'm honestly convinced that Martin barely knows anything about Christianity
He's an American atheist. What do you expect?
>- Extremely skeptical or hostile toward magic and miracles
hostility towards magic (demon shit) is Christian enough and the Faith never claims that miracles don't exist. they even have a group that maintains a pool of alleged healing water
>- Has no prophets or apostles that have prophetic visions or heal people
Not like we have much info on historical/mythological Faithful in the first place.

It's supposed to be a Catholic/organized religion stand-in rather than a Christianity strand-in, but it fails at the former anyway.
>that only seems like Christianity in organizational structure
that's the point, tard
>The Faith of the Seven is one of the most secular religions I've read in fiction that somehow convinces many it's not.
even fedora tipping redditors bring up the cynicism/generally secular nature of Westeros
>>
>>218462063
its funny how its the only faith thats just objectivly wrong and every other faith is real but its also the only one that doesnt require you to be fucked up to practice it
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>>218462231
>the only faith thats just objectivly wrong
Then why did they win?
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>>218456711
I'm just barely finding out that the actor Danny Webb who played Ser Arlan also played Morse in Alien 3. This nigga was the only one who survived the xenomorph at the end of the movie. A proper mentor for Dunk.
>>
>>218462231
>its also the only one that doesnt require you to be fucked up to practice it
No, it just dictates your morality and rejects your traditions
>>
Just thinking, does the Lannister Lion in the books have a mane? Their lions should be Mountain Lions, right?
>>
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>>218462437
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>>218462063
The more i read about the religion the less i care for it. Get the fuck out of my head with your jewish fairytales.
>>
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>>218462253
based
>>
>>218462280
Holy fuck REALLY!?
>>
>>218461818
Isn't Hardhome like wildling Pripyat?
>>
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Is it bad that Ser Arlan is already in my top 5 favorite characters in the showverse
>>
>>218462809
Could be worse, you could be fingering your asshole to a Bracken
>>
>>218462437
>Their lions should be Mountain Lions, right?
The books imply that Westeros' lions are real, African style lions that happen to live in a European climate, which isn't that weird since lions (probably) used to live in Greece and Spain. The other possibility is that they are prehistoric cave lions.
>>
>>218462809
If Arlan was in the red keep when Robert dropped dead I imagine it would’ve been amusing
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What girls have the highest SMV in Westerosi history? pic unrelated
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>>218457597
send this to that fat fuck martin and maybe we'll get TWOW by 2030
>>
Imagine being a noble House and instead of some cool ass animal like lions or wolves or shit your House symbol is a fucking fish lmao
Then again, sure it’s bad but could be worse, could be some fucking flowers hahaha
>>
>>218462960
Unironically Rhaeneyra before she was deflowered and Targs are allegedly beautiful. A savvy political player could have had all of Westeros through her. In the main books, I suppose it's Sansa who is unusually beautiful in the books and heiress to Winterfell (presuming the Stark boys are dead) and Riverrun after the Tullys (supposing Robert Arryn dies) and maybe Harrenhal as well if you go back far enough. If you had sufficient political capital, you could just chill while the Lannisters commit political suicide then waltz in and take it. Her or Dany. SMV in Westeros is political, looks are important but not as important because there are tons of beautiful women in Westeros.
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>>218462847
>Seething at Brackenchads out of nowhere
Rent. Free.
>>
>>218461440
>“The Dothraki sacked cities and plundered kingdoms, they did not rule them. Dany had no wish to reduce King’s Landing to a blackened ruin full of unquiet ghosts. She had supped enough on tears. I want to make my kingdom beautiful, to fill it with fat men and pretty maids and laughing children. I want my people to smile when they see me ride by, the way Viserys said they smiled for my father.”
She don't think it be like it is...But it do!
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>>218462960
dornish pussy
>>
>>218463023
The bad poosy?
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>>218463015
>fat men and pretty maids
>not handsome men and pretty maids
What did George mean by this?
>>
>>218463002
>and Riverrun after the Tullys (supposing Robert Arryn dies)
Riverrun went to Freys and her uncle is still alive and has an heir, so she's down the ladder in that succession
>>
>>218463015
If you're talking books, I'm pretty sure Danny had ordered thousands of kids as young as 13 (and probably younger, it's not like they had ID to prove they were under 13 to the unsullied) murdered, including non slave owned freemen, when she seized the Unsullied and made them her slaves.
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What house would Edward belong to?
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>>218463089
>ordered thousands of kids as young as 13 murdered
So does every lord in Westeros when it’s time for a war.
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>>218463115
she ordered to execute every non-slave above age of 12 in city she sacked.
Btw, every boy that survived was castrated and trained into next unsullied by the people she left in charge of the city.
>>
>>218463115
In the same book Robb Stark has the Lord Karstark killed for killing two squires the same age. It's very clearly meant to show how evil and psychotic she is. George specifically gave ages instead of being ambiguous to demonstrate it. Whataboutism doesn't make her not a pyscho btw.
>>
>>218463097
gryffindor
>>
>>218463097
Targshits were based on the Normans, so as a relative to the Normans he'd probably be a Velaryon or a Celtigar or something.
>>
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>>218462063
>The Faith of the Seven is one of the most secular religions I've read in fiction
Westeros is crazy secular. Way more so than the contemporary US for example. Most of the characters are completely indifferent to religion, if not outright atheistic. And the entire society around them is areligious too, except for some off-hand reminders every now and then that there's supposedly a church going on. Beeing religious is a special character trait that Martin mostly gives to a few women and "unmanly" men (Catelyn, Aeron), and to the retarded masses of the peasants. All those lords and knights we see don't care about their soul, or about divine judgement, or about following the examples of the saints or whatever.

There's a great rant by a historian specifically about how GRRM gets swearing/oath taking wrong: https://acoup.blog/2019/06/28/collections-oaths-how-do-they-work/

K7K did a few steps in the right direction, notably with Ser Arlan killing ICE agents "in the name of the mother!".

>>218462231
>its funny how its the only faith thats just objectivly wrong and every other faith is real
It's implied that Davos died in the battle of the Blackwater and was revived by the Seven.
>>
>>218463163
Yeah and how many boys did Robb send to their deaths in his campaign against the Lannisters? How many more boys died when that campaign fell apart after he decided to execute Karstark?
>>
>Dany’s whole plotline of being the white savior to all the poor brown slaves in Essos
Still hilarious how George got away with this.
>>
>>218463256
no one gave a shit about this nonsense until 2016
and afterwards every made fun of her, she was the postergirl for it with the one meme
>>
>>218463235
Completely different circumstance. The Lannisters were literally torturing and raping people to death in the Riverlands when Da Norf went in. He never did it with any intent to kill kids either. Dany goes out of her way to specifically name an age range that includes kids for the crime of not being slaves (note, she doesn't say slavers, just anyone wearing a freeman's clothes). Even if it was the case, Robb could be skinning kids and it STILL wouldn't make Dany any less of a villain.
>>
>>218463256
>her story in Essos(in show) ends with her leaving completely dysfunctional mess with Daario fucking Naharis in charge
literally Iraq 2.0
>>
>>218463142
>When a city got sacked people died
Sounds like every war in Westeros.
>>
>Heh, yeah he killed people but people kill people all the time. Guess you didn't think about that, did you?
>>
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>>218463293
>Dany is literally between Tywin and Mountain in how she handles sacking the city
>this somehow has to paint her as good person
>>
>>218462063
GURM knows about Catholicism, which is where the Faith's main inspiration, he just decided to split the theology of Christianity in his universe into more religions in the setting:
The cult of R'hllor took the Messiah aspect, the end of world worldview that culminates in the good god facing off against the evil one. It has prophets, healers and missionaries and even involves resurrection of the dead.

The Lhazareen's religion involving the The Great Shepherd has the Monotheism, believes all of humanity are one flock of people, created protected by their Shepherd, which is pretty much Jesus, and has that universalist, turn the other cheek belief that defines NT.

Even the Drowned God religion took the rituals such as baptism, the idea of death and rebirth, and that after they die they will drink and feast for all eternity with their god similar to Jesus saying his followers will dine with him in heaven.
>>
>>218456711
>>218458323
SEXOOOOOOO
>>
>>218459914
Better yet, https://youtu.be/giHGHresc8Q
>>
>>218463235
>when that campaign fell apart after he decided to execute Karstark
Never happened. Executing Karstark changed nothing, they were already deserting. His company was falling apart ever since Tywin turned east to King's Landing and he married Jeyne.
>>
>>218463285
She specifically called out not to kill anyone under 13 but i think Unsullied know better than to kill harmless teenagers.
>>
>>218463089
>>218463411
someone find the bloody mention in the book
>>
>>218463285
>Completely different circumstance
Not really. War is war. Boys dying may not have been Robb’s intent but it still happened. Just because his intentions were noble doesn’t change the fact he sent boys to their deaths with his failure leading to much more loss of life. And the north also got up to the old ultra violence as well.
>>
>>218463322
>paint her as good person
Not trying to. Just saying her methods aren’t that different from most of nobles in Westeros. Also Robert and other lords didn’t care about Tywins sack of kings landing and murder of the Targaryen children.
>>
Did Tywin kill everyone older than 12 in Kings Landing the book, or were his men just rough in sacking it? I think Dany might actually be worse than Tywin.
>>
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>>218456711
Blackfyre conspiracy 150 years in the making
>>
>>218463534
so Mountain is not a horrific since he mostly rapes girls above age of 12. He's just like dany!
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>>218463563
>"Your Grace," said Jorah Mormont, "I saw King's Landing after the Sack. Babes were butchered that day as well, and old men, and children at play. More women were raped than you can count. There is a savage beast in every man, and when you hand that man a sword or spear and send him forth to war, the beast stirs. The scent of blood is all it takes to wake him.
>>
>>218463534
Yeah, and most of the Nobles in Westeros are scum bro. She's them but crazy and with dragons. They can't all be Edmure.
>>
>>218463638
Yeah, his men were rough, brutal even. Did Tywin order that everyone older (or younger) than 12 be killed? Do we get evidence of this?
>>
>>218463666
No he just ordered for an entire city to be butchered indiscriminately. Begone devil.
>>
>blackfyre rebellions started because a Blackwood bastard and Bracken bastard just really hated each other and convinced their brothers to fight
Fucking Riverlanders, always fucking shit up.
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>>218463699
I guess he is truly Dany tier evil then.
>>
dany is just as evil if not more so than Tywin
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question for bookfags, will the best house and region be mentioned or appear in season 2 of Dunk & Egg?
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>>218463806
No, Dunk is going there eventually but George hasn't wrote it yet.
>>
>>218463806
no, Dunk and Egg story about Winterfell will be written after Fire and Blood 2 that will be written right after Winds of Winter
>>
>>218463632
Even if I could understand what you’re trying to say, you’re clearly an ESL so your opinion is worthless.
>>
>>218463829
>>218463856
I can't wait to see the meeting between Dunk and Ned Stark.
>>
>>218463806
>she wolves of winterfell
They’re all unlikable cunts having a civil war, it’s gonna be like dance of the dragons but with starks
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>if I had grown up on a farm and was retarded, battle of the bastards might impress me, but I didn’t so it doesn’t.
>>
>>218463220
>>The Faith of the Seven is one of the most secular religions I've read in fiction

Westeros is incredibly secular. And it baffles me why anyone is in a world where magic clearly exists.

One thing that annoys me about GoT is that after season 6, almost every important character in the show begins openly dismissing the gods, faith, and religion, even in front of other knights, religious leaders, or other lords who should be religious or at least vow to be pious.

Daenerys's rant in front of Jon is just baffling. Despite wanting to be the monarch of Westeros, which entails her being the protector of the Faith, she literally starts ranting to Jon that she has no faith in gods, legends, or myths—only herself. She invokes the Divine Right of Kings and wants to be the leader of a group of religious people, despite believing in no religion or divine gods that grant her that right.

Jon Snow was literally resurrected by a priest, witnessed magical dragons, skinchangers, wights, and White Walkers, seen magical walls, and even wielded a magical sword—yet he acts like the afterlife, souls, and gods are difficult things to believe.

Surrounded by all kinds of magic, but characters are completely dismissive of gods, legends, myths, souls, and the afterlife—as if they’re just a bunch of Agent Scullies talking about aliens.
>>
Yeen
>>
Blackfyre this
Blackfyre that
They fucking lost lmao
>>
>>218463988
All part of their plan.
>>
>>218463988
you can't lose if you don't admit defeat
>>
>>218463976
the show is actually as atheist as george is. he routinely writes contradictory statements about the status of higher powers in planetos. sure astute readers can inference the influence of The Seven in a meta narrative fashion, but every overt reference to faithful characters is as a detractor to the practice of organized religion. the only instance of proper piety in the show is the priest that helps reform sandor "The Hound" Clegane, and is one of the silver linings of later seasons
>>
>>218463988
shut the fuck up brynden
>>
>>218463959
based
>>
>>218463988
How many living Targs still exist in season 8 vs the Blackfyres?
>>
>>218458772
>Literally a cripple
fuck he gonna do?
>>
>>218463988
I didn’t hear no bell
>>
Funny the two Retargs fought over the destiny of Westeros, meanwhile the prophecy was about Arya Stark and the Starks. Maybe Aemond's blood is in them, haha
>>
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>>218463988
he lost the battle but bore the digits
>>
I love d&d so much for ruining the targ prophecy. They’re my heroes for that
>>
>>218463959
I love when the huge mountains of bodies pile up out of nowhere. Or when Davos leads the charge of a reinforcement of six guys
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>>218464312
>>218464274
Yeah what would we have done without this riveting scene.
>>
Davos is probably the most religious PoV character, outside of maybe Sansa before she got blackpilled, even though he isn't *that* religious and he is also the most righteous of all of them. In fact, when he embraces his gods again after the Blackwater he even goes against Stannis solely because it's the right thing to do, even though he is undying loyal.
>>
>>218464137
>>218463976
The discourse around the depiction of religion in asoiaf is also not helped by the fact that many commentators don't really grasp it either. And by that I don't mean beeing religious yourself (I'm an atheist), but having some deeper education about the history and sociology of it.

For example: In one of their Dunk Time videos Schwift and Glidus talked about how the chivalric culture of Westeros is driving men to violence. When the culture of chivalry irl and in the books was clearly an attempt to reduce and canalize violence by putting rules on it. Without the idea that knights have to follow divine rules there would be more, not less violence.
>>
>Dragons still exist
>Valyrians still exist to ride them
What's stopping some Valyrian upstart from the Free cities, Dragonseed from Westeros or Blackfyre bastard from the female line taking Danny's last dragon and attempting Aegon's Conquest 2.0 again in some other part of the world?
>>
>>218464428
I think being Valyrian alone isn't enough. The existence of Dragonlords implies there were Vaylrians who were Dragonlets.
>>
something thats really nice in the books thats not present in the show is when these characters who are cynical and used to rotten individuals meet people who are pure and nice who show them basic kindness then instantly fall in love with them
like when Sansa is nice to the Hound or Jon calls Tyrion his friend
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What's the worst chapter in all of the books? I remember one that was just Cat slowly climbing up to the Eyrie, nothing else happened
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Who's the Black Douglas of ASOIAF?
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>>218464578
gotta be a Dorne chapter. Areo Hotah or Princess in the Tower
>>
>>218464453
There were only like 40 Dragonrider families in the Valyrian Freehold before the doom, it's actually a tiny number considering how old and large the Freehold was, it basically ruled all of western Essos. It'd be like if only a few dozen families in all of Westeros were allowed to own and ride horses
>>
>>218464428
That's what probably was supposed to happen in ADWD. Atleast one of Dany's dragons would get stolen and they'd have to fight.
>>
>>218464610
>from Douglasdale
who writes this shit
>>
>>218464610
>With the help of his kinsman Thomas Dickson, son of Earl Richard Keith and Castellan of Douglas Castle, Douglas and his small troop were hidden until the morning of Palm Sunday, when the garrison left the battlements to attend the local church. Gathering local support, he entered the church and the war-cry "Douglas! Douglas!" went up for the first time. Some of the English soldiers were killed and others taken prisoner.
Snake move. Probably Jon Con. The Douglas Words (A Douglas! A Douglas!) are the same as the Connington Words (A Griffon! A Griffon!) and I could see Jon pulling such a maneuverer against a sept after Bobby B mindbroke him. I get a lot of Jacobite vibes from the Blackfyres, I assume that's who they're based on. Actually, their current leader, Lord Strickland might have the same fate as the historical Lord Strickland who was supposed to show up with reinforcements and instead came with a small number of knights, dooming the cause.
>>
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and the award for the ugliest dragon goes to.....
Moondancer
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>>218464302
>made it in
>>
>>218464453
> Dragonlets
I want to think that was an actual official term the 40 families had for the lesser Valyrians like the Velaryons and Celtigars lmao
>>
>>218463988
the victor is not victorious if the vanquished doesnt consider himself so
>>
Catelyn chapters are so fucking boring
maybe if I was unaware of how the whole conspiracy resolves I'd be into it but I'm just glazing past them
Sansa chapters are really good
>>
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>>218464578
>sam fat pink masting on the cinnamon wind
>aero hotah watching doran sit watching oranges plop plop plop in the water gardens
>jon watching over the UN relief fund food drop to the wildlings in molestown
>brienne's 5th iteration of "i'm looking for a maid with blue eyes and auburn hair" in the riverlands
>arianne crashing out in her tower
>dany holding court in meereen

just off the top of my head
>>
>So White Walkers are just a side project of the Children of the Forest that went horribly wrong, akin to experimented infected monkeys that accidentally got released and unleashed a zombie outbreak
>Somehow this mistake is a huge deal that almost all major religions with prophets and the the royal families, such as the Targaryens, who have the same prophetic insight in some of their members, all believe this to be some kind of apocalyptic world ending threat.
>Fucking GRRM even implies that one of Aegon's reasons why he and his sisters even arrived in Westeros is because of a prophecy that states they have to be there to fight these ice zombies
WTF? The Others all died if their leader dies. The White Walkers weren't as much as a threat as they claim to be. One continent took them out, and it was a continent where they were already in a civil war with fewer numbers available.

Seriously, everyone was pissing their pants and literally had prophetic nightmares about this? Why? It seems like it was just minor regional problem that had to be dealt with and the rest of the Westeros families went back to their backstabbing politics like nothing happened.
>>
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>>218465017
Yeah Brienne AFFC is miserably boring for most of it
I think in middle school the chapter where she gets Dunk’s shields bored me to tears
Dany mereen chapters are horrible bc of all the fake Arab names
>>
>>218464197
>How many living Targs still exist in season 8 vs the Blackfyres?
Why do you BlackedFyrers tards act like you won because the Targs died out? So did your faction decades prior.
>>
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do targ women have silver pussy hair, or is it dark like their eyebrows?
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>>218465243
That’s why the book version of the Others is far more interesting, with them being some actual race of ice magic using necromancer Fae things, with their own language and society instead of just being ice zombies.
>>
>>218465243
straight up the others are such nonissue
Mance Ryder and his army could've just destroyed them on their own in show version, it made no sense for free folks to try to escape them or fight the nights watch or go south of the wall at all, they had stronger force at the time than what white walkers encountered at Winterfell

of all the shit that sucks in later seasons, I can see a lot of them being OK in the book format - Dany going crazy, Brann becoming king 3 eyed raven

I have NO CLUE how GRRM makes payoff to Others storyline satisfyingly AT ALL
They lose to the first force opposing them instantly

Watching them still try to make White Walkers big deal in HotD feels so stupid. They are fucking jobbers, they are not a threat whatsoever.
>>
i read a fanfic where Doran Martell is faking having gout, and uses it as an excuse to retreat to the water gardens and not be seen. when in reality he is the one doing all the in-person legwork for the targ/blackfyre conspiracies
>>
>>218464428
It's magic that lets them control the dragons.
Magic carried on through regular incest.
No one but the Targaryens carried on that tradition. So no one but Jon, Dany, Viserys, and Aemon had any chance of taming a dragon.
>>
>>218465017
>>218465286
yeah Jon and Dany's plots get so repetitive in ADWD, they're only readable because of the side characters like Stannis. Tyrion's chapters get criticized but at least we get some more Essos lore
>>
>>218465439
>I read a fanfic
Stop doing that
>>
>>218464578
Eyrie chapters are always my picks
>>
>>218465328
Depends on how pure the blood is. Those with high Valyrian blood have winter bush and those with more westerosi blood have summer bush.
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>>218465999
>>
The Targaryen proud Valyrian bloodline died the moment it introduced filthy Dornish blood into it.
Like Andal and First Men were questionable at best, but intermingling with disgusting Rhoynar heritage is too far.
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my wife jon snow is so beautiful
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Yrkoon
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kinda resent them from adapting first book so well because I want to get to the shit where it differs
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>>218465328
it varies
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>>218465425
I wonder if it really was grrm's plan to have the Others defeated in a battle at Winterfell. Because that means they only make it half way through the North. The southron kingdoms wouldn't notice anything of the invasion and probably would not even believe it was really.

Would be a shitty apocalypse.
>>
>>218465472
There should be a pretty high number of dragonseeds in Dragonstone with enough Targ ancestry.
>>
Wasn't the bump limit on /tv/ 300?
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>>218466064
You lost to BRC Blackfyre cuck
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>>218466219
Ah, 310 apparently.
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>>218465576
reading fanfic is better than watching HotD
>>
>>218466210
I have thought about this. You could argue that the Dance has selected all the carriers of the flyer gene out of the Dragonstone population. A lot of people tried to tame dragons, most of them died, and the few who succeeded got killed later in the war. So the gene might have been purged.

Damn Maesters, that was surely their plan!
>>
>>218466300
Only those who had the willingness to try to tame a dragon knowing the odds of death were high, that can't have been all of them. Aegon IV also singlehandedly produced enough bastards to ensure the Targ lineage would continue, truly he was a visionary and the greatest king of his dynasty.
>>
I hope there won't be any bastard bakes this time ...
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>>218466081
why is he asian
>>
>>218466518
anime poisons the mind
>>
Rereading AGOT, the show mogs it so hard. It is like a young adult novel how unserious the writing is. The drama is extremely exaggerated and unsubtle compared to the show, and characters are like cartoon characters.

Everytime Ned talks to Robert, Robert is flying off the handle and sperging out. Jamie kills Neds men as a prank. Robert bursting out laughing every other scene and pouring wine everywhere.

The dialogue written for the show is much much better.
>>
>>218463779
>>218463796
Nah, they’re just people of their time.
>>
>>218462809
you might just be a homosexual attracted to his huge dick
>>
>>218466640
Retard



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