what the FUCK was Professor Umbridge's problem? arbitrarily banning things she didn't like, with no expectation of the students knowing what would trigger her?Who should play her in the HBO series?
needed bwc
>>219037387>Who should play her in the HBO series?Some old ass bitch, who gives a fuck. There's a dime dozen of these acty actor old British bitches
>gets raped by centaurs
>>219037427I don't actually care tha tmuch. That line was thrown in to emphasis that the OP relates to /television & film/.It's really just an allegory complaining about other worthless authority figures who, despite no rules being broken, still enjoy banning others' fun.
>>219037596I see you are a fellow student of Strauss
rowling is unconsciously misogynist and is unable to write characters with mixed moralityso umbridge is just randomly evil for seemingly no reason. She's evil and works in the government and tortures kids with no oversight or consequences from the ministry, but it's cool harry is going to be an auror now that all the bad people lost, there's no systemic problems with the government, it just happens to have bad people in it.
>>219037651>He suggested that the classical authors hid their true teachings behind a surface layer of conventional opinions, in order to avoid persecution and to educate only the few who were capable of grasping themUh...based?
>>219037816Few know of this arcane art
For instance, why did she have to ban Quidditch entirely?Sure, whenever Harry's friend Seamus MacFarlane was involved, trouble often followed. But banning even discussion of Quidditch entirely, even the most innocuous of conversation, just on the off-chance that Seamus might blow up something, seems a bit extreme and petty, no?It's too bad Umbridge didn't get her head caved in by the centaurs.
>>219037739>rowling is unconsciously misogynistYeah, I think she has some serious biases and projects them on her most hateful, delusional, and irredeemable characters.
She makes sense when you understand how oppressive the education system is in bongland. pink floyd made an album about it called The Wall.
>>219037387>Who should play her in the HBO series?You know exactly who they'll get - the woman they put in everything.
>>219038086>It's too bad Umbridge didn't get her head caved in by the centaurs.there are things worse than death, anon
>>219038468roger waters is a delusional narcissist. Great musician, but the whole "boo hoo I hate going to school, I hate my mom, being a famous rockstar is really hard guys" thing in the wall is unserious whining
>>219038491getting ganbanged by centaurs isn't worse than death
>>219038468I'm only somewhat familiar. Was that abusive and oppressive educational system a long-standing institution in Britain, or were the problems exacerbated by post-War bitterness? Were teachers just driven mad by having to correct pupils, essentially for free, and struggled to maintain any pitiful measure of power by demeaning them?
>>219038564Hello Doug Walker!
>>219038491What if the centaurs had dark powers to remove a magical person's magic? Then she would never be a witch.
>>219038468Her trope makes perfect sense in America too, pip down,
>>219038784Yeah, I suppose the underlying tropes Transfer to America too. But it doesn't Pass the same threshold. Americans have similar anglo cultural Chromosomes, but fall into different Traps of understanding based on divergent history.
>>219037387>that smut where youre some rowdy student whos held back after class in detention by umbridge, and it ends with her casting crucio on you then whilst youre on the floor in agony, getting on top and cowgirlingstill have it saved on my old phone
>>219037387>what the FUCK was Professor Umbridge's problem? arbitrarily banning things she didn't like, with no expectation of the students knowing what would trigger her?>>Who should play her in the HBO series?Creator cameo by Rowling herself.
>>219038468Like, two songs on that album were about that. You'd have more of an argument claiming it's about losing your dad as a child.
>>219037387>arbitrarily banning things she didn't like, with no expectation of the students knowing what would trigger her?Reminds me of someone.
>>219037387A lot of fans hate her more than Voldy. I don’t know if that’s cause she’s a good villain or Voldy is a shit one.
>>219037387>Professor "Gets Offended">gets offendedBravo, Vince.
imagine the handjobs
>>219038468I dont think you actually listened to the wall
>>219037739>rowling is unconsciously misogynist>implying women lack the agency to be authoritarian pieces of shit like men can belmao
>>219037420She got it. Centaur flavored.
>>219038564>delusional narcissist So is every famous person. If you can make a cool album out of it, that’s pretty based.
>>219037387in some ways, she's the perfect depiction of the neo-liberal managers who form the political class in Western countries. Ultra-censorious, needlessly cruel, petty, tyrannical, compulsively implementing new rules and regulations which do nothing but dis-empower regular people, inflexible to the point where they cannot be reasoned or appealed to, slaves to higher authority while framing everything they do in benevolent pro-social justifications. Normies might say she's a fascist but that's a modern liberal, through and through.
>>219037387>Karen that cares more about the rules being followed rather than how moral the rules are. When the wizard nazi's take over she's more than happy to send rule breakers to Azkaban for even the smallest of infractions.
>>219037387Haha yeah wouldn’t it be crazy to live in some kind of crazy authoritarian hell hole? Haha. Like- imagine if the government started forcing you to dox yourself just to use the Internet haha. Like if they kept saying that they were protecting children but all they did was make the quality of life worse for everyone and exposed everyone to genuine security risks just to have greater control?Haha such a thing sure is the stuff of fiction
>>219037387She was just a psychopath who liked using her power to fuck others over. Even out of Hogwarts, she was busy passing laws that made somebody's lives hell. Not much else to it.
>>219037739Have you ever seen any people in givernment? They're corrupted by the power. They don't need any reason to be evil.
>>219037387>looking for an Umbridge next to Imelda Stauntongood luck
>>219037387>Who should play her in the HBO series?
>>219037739Rowling is a Blairite liberal; her views mirror the current system in the UK.Harry and his friends are not revolutionaries; they are enforcers of the system. Voldemort is just someone who is not sufficiently liberal. To give her props, though, she actually showed a very realistic representation of totalitarianism. Umbridge was not some moustache-twirling supervillain (like Voldemort); she just wanted to make things better and safer.Unfortunately, the children did not want that, so she had to enforce her vision with pointless bureaucracy and rules. Power was not seized overnight; she had to slowly boil the frog and turn the children against each other.
>>219048836Umbridge did not want to make things "better and safer", if she did she wouldn't have instituted literal physical torture as a disciplinary method as a teacher. She was a violent person who found a job where she got to indulge in her violent impulses in a socially acceptable way.
>>219049112She did; that is all her curriculum was for. All of her educational decrees began by introducing nanny-state law and order in the school. Ones like: Punishment for spell-check quill, No unauthorised sweets, No music during study hours, No unauthorised broom flying, No boys and girls within 6/8 inches of each other No joke products from the Weasleys, Boys must keep their hands inside their cloaks,Confining pets to Common Rooms onlyNo magic to change one's physical appearanceAll totalitarians aim for a utopia, and Umbridge was no different. She thought she was leading them to a better school, where everyone would be safe. All her lessons were theoretical, no magic, designed to be "secure, and risk-free". In her speech at the start of the year, she said the Ministry always considered a proper education for students to be vital. Once the students began to revolt against the nanny state rules (as normal people do), Umbridge (as totalitarians do) had to take further and further drastic measures to contain the dissent.This includes more radical decreases like:Disbanding all student organisations,Banned teachers from sharing unapproved information, Banning the QuibblerBanned items not considered educationalAllowed wants to be confiscatedBanned literature written by Muggles or Half-BloodsRequired students to "consent" to having their mail searchedCancelled QuidditchForced students to "submit" to questioningCurfews on the Grounds and Library,Capital punishmentThe fact that Umbridge would torture and violate the rights of students does not contradict the idea that she was aiming for a utopia. As with every totalitarian regime in human history, dissent is the biggest threat, and that threat has to be curtailed by any means necessary to remain in power.
>>219037739Umbridge is one of the most realistically evil people in the books, which is why she's consistently ranked as the most hated character by readers despite coming from a series about child murdering evil wizards Few people have met the latter, but everyone knows an Umbridge.
>>219037387Imagine as punishment she shrank you and forced you to massage her feet haha
>>219049112probably a remnant of her own upbringing, teachers were abusive when she was growing up see pink floyd's the wall. children were caned across their knuckles VERY commonly when she would have been a girl, it was abolished when she turned ~20>>219048836>Rowling is a Blairite liberal100% agree with everything you said, its a reason why harry ends up a bureaucrat in the system, its all the middle class aspire to be
Who cares who plays her, the real question is will they include an explicit scene of the centaurs having their way?
OH N-
>>219037387Brie Larson
>>219037739>so umbridge is just randomly evil for seemingly no reason. She's evil and works in the government and tortures kids with no oversight or consequences from the ministryyou say randomly but a lot of the inspirations for harry potter characters come from rowling's life. i bet rowling had a teacher who did all the mean shit umbridge did and it went on unchecked. teachers can be mean bastards and back in the day they were free to be cruel as well. corporal punishment was a thing
>>219037387I want to fuck her so bad.
Kiera Knightley did her voice in the full-cast audio book. She was pretty good but made Umbridge sound a bit too sexy
>>219051249lmaoooyou just KNOW
>>219051249Still mad they got rid of Hermoine's bushy hairdo after the first two movies and just turned her into a high IQ Stacy
>>219052777Trips confirm.Whenever I read HP smut on AO3, I don't imagine Emma Watson.
>>219048384>>219052837>>219051080>feet>Midris Elba>HP smut
>>219044574source plslooks like a great scene
>>219037387She was a parody of the English government
>>219051249>>219052750>>219038491>>219038614Just remember, as a baseline, wizards and witches are more durable and tougher than normal humans, by a significant amount. Which means 4 feet of horsecock that would kill a normal human would only kind of harm a witch or wizard.So yeah, a gallon of cum and an enormous amount of centaur cock. And ass, she was probably forced to eat their buttholes too. Her puke and shit was 80% centaur semen by the end.
>>219037387Do you know what umbridge means?
>>219054527I take umbrage with that question.
>>219052837very bullyable
I want her to sit on my face.
Another one I think about a lotWhat was Rowling's intention in making a reporter the worst fucking person in the world? I thought reporters were supposed to be heroes to libs
>>219048384>Nah nigga, only one brotha is allowed in Hoodwartz, one atta time muthfucka
>>219037739>umbridge is just randomly evil for seemingly no reasonThis is more realistic than your libtard fan-fiction where bad people just didn't get enough therapy and welfare
>>219041130Umbridge isn't hot though. She's like the opposite of that.>>219051577kek lmao what were they thinking
>>219050112>Punishment for spell-check quill, >No music during study hours, >No boys and girls within 6/8 inches of each other >Boys must keep their hands inside their cloaks,>Confining pets to Common Rooms only>No magic to change one's physical appearance>Allowed wants to be confiscated>Banned literature written by Muggles or Half-BloodsYou made these ones up I think, I don't remember them at all.>>219037739There were good women too though. I think she just hated totalitarian authoritative teachers from her school days. Umbridge is also there to show you can be evil without directly being a death eater and as another reason why Harry refuses to work with the ministry to stop Voldemort.>>219054653This one makes sense, Rowling got pissed at all the journalists, papparazzi, and media attention following the success of the early books so wrote Rita as the kind of journalist she hated, like the British tabloid journalists and paps who just wrote whatever was most attention generating.
>>219037387>what the FUCK was Professor Umbridge's problem? arbitrarily banning things she didn't likeHave you ever seen what a woman in a position of authority is like? There first instinct is to ban everything that upsets their feefees
>>219038614If you wouldn't rather die than get gang raped by horses then you must really like living
>15 hours >barely over 50 posts>constant necroingreddit rats at it again
>>219052777She still has it, just not on her head.
>>219056868How do you have the time in life to care about such a stupid thing
>>219055329>You made these ones up I think, I don't remember them at all.He did.
>>219037387imagine if they got christina hendricks or bdh
>>219038468It’s like that everywhere. Women get into teaching because it gives them absolute power over children. Think of an environment where you can’t speak or use the bathroom without permission. What kind of authoritarian personality would that draw out?
>>219054653Hermione basically torturing her by keeping her imprisoned and threatening to squash her on one occasion always stood out in my mind that Hermione would also have done great in Slytherin. I'm sure there's a fanfic of that House choice.>>219057252>Women get into teaching because it gives them absolute power over children.>nice.gif
>>219054653>Rita SkeeterWould with the force of a thousand suns. I'd pull up that tight green skirt and have my way.
>>219048384>Idris Elba gets gangraped by a bunch of white centaurs
>>219038784No it doesn’t unless you went to a gay private school. Don’t ever you me again.
>>219057479>Hermione would also have done great in Slytherin. I'm sure there's a fanfic of that House choice.Several. Some are ok. >>219057732Nah, in american schools the children are drugged up and intimidated for shits and giggles.
>>219057479>Hermione>SlytherinOh yeah
>>219037387>what the FUCK was Professor Umbridge's problem? arbitrarily banning things she didn't like, with no expectation of the students knowing what would trigger her?Control. There are women out there that desire control of things for the sake of having control. These people cannot allow other people to be "wrong" and what is wrong or imperfect is entirely within their own mind. They cannot allow other to be outside of their control because that may allow them to challenge their ability to control. Thus a feedback loop of grasping for power to exercise power to achieve their needs. They're usually also sadists.
>>219037739It's like she wrote books for children or something
>>219037387it will be fifteen fucking years before we'll even see her in the series, who cares
>>219058097>it will be fifteen fucking years before we'll even see her in the series, who caresUmbridge is an interesting character for people who have never encountered a real life example of the type of a female power monger.
>>219058097I do wonder how far they'll get, but I doubt it's that far
>>219057801>Some are ok.Are they complete?
She was a leftist.
Some women are just cunts, female pastors are mostly like this.
>>219037387> Who should play her in the HBO series?
