Times you acted like Bond, James Bond?
>Baja Blast...shaken, not stirred.
There's never a time when I don't act like Bond.
One time I chased a russian general through the streets of st petersberg in a tank. Shit was so cash.
>>219600954>7-UP please... and make that sugar-free, barkeep. Don't forget my straw.
Except it was a common house spider
>>219600954>Times you acted like Bond, James Bond?But I'm not Irish or Scotish.
When I say yes, considerably
>>219600954Just 7 days back I went into space to stop an industrialist from killing humanity on Earth. I had to destroy capsules carrying nerve gas by laser, yet the automatic firing malfunctioned so I had to do it manually. So you know, the basic and usual sort of stuff.
>>219600954I drank heavily last night.
That time when I took advantage of a human trafficking victim in the shower.
>>219600954I drive a period correct Brosnan BMW and I run from the police a lot. I fucked a fat woman twice. I punched my neighbor in the stomach and when he called the police on me I didn't answer the door and that made the problem go away. Spy shit.
>>219600954I steal shit tons of office supplies from my government job. I'm also the security person so I know where all the cameras are at the same time I constantly demand new shipments of supplies, feels good to be a gangster.
>>219600954>time I acted like Bond
>>219602527For after school, James?
>>219601862Redeem an QRD saar
>>219602527I miss playing 007 with my fwens.
>>219600954I bought an E38 like the one in Tomorrow Never Dies, except it was a 740iL instead of just the regular 730 used in the movie (which Q also wrongly calls the 750iL anyway).
>>219600954>No............ for me
>>219602527I hope this isn't AI>>219602768Do you still drive it? I'm driving my E39 until I die.
I feel like everybody forgets the awkward phone calls he makes requesting more and more money to blow on the poker table because he sucks at playing poker.
>>219602684>QRDIt's what Bond does in Skyfall.
>>219602935I can't remember a single thing from those movies except there was the gay guy from no country in one of them and I am never watching a movie ever again.
>>219602875>Do you still drive it? I'm driving my E39 until I die.Sold unfortunately, I had too many cars for a while. I was also trying to juggle having an E39, E34 and E60 all at the same time. Strangely the E39 was the absolute worst car I had, it had issues that I could never find and not even professional shops could find. Glad that you still ahve yours, they're beautiful cars and it makes me sad that mine never worked out.
>>219602975The final movie is probably the worst in the entire series and yes I'm counting everything like Die Another Day and Moonraker in that rating.
>>219603047Sad to hear that frend. I had an E39 540i briefly and then my mechanics son was selling his E39 M5 and he called and asked if I wanted it. I bought it immediately and I've been driving it almost daily for 16 years. No issues really. It's still under 200,000 miles.
>>219603091Did they ever make a black or female bond?
>>219603309Goddamn, an E39 M5? That's excellent, I'd keep that no matter what bullshit it threw my way. The E39 I had was a regular 530i, the interior was just incredible and in absolute mint condition, it was was such a comfy car to drive when it was actually working.
>>219603351No, it was just really badly written, which is really saying something with Die Another Day in the mix.
>>219603091Moonraker doesn't belong in the Worst Of list. It's a fun caper.But Die Another Day is just atrocious, and yeah, worse than No Time to Die. Madonna is in the film, because she was in her "British phase" at the time, and she created this autotuned garbage song to go with it:https://youtu.be/VlbaJA7aO9M?list=RDVlbaJA7aO9M
>>219603580I included it only because of its reputation and usual ratings, even though it's a pretty fun film.
>>219600954I once drank a dry vodka martini, it was pretty good.
>>219603484Thanks frend. That's what I said in my head when he asked if I wanted it. I traded in the 540i and gave him an envelope with $18,000 in it. It's been nothing but great so far. Cured me of wanting something JDM...
>>219600954>I prefer bourbon.I get they were trying to make her the new M who was the complete opposite of the old guard and at odds with Bond.But how the fuck would a 61 year old English woman in 1995 prefer bourbon?
>>219604426alcohol is mad gay and people peer pressure you to drink it and call you a pussy if you dont even women. I hate drunk people. Give me drugs instead u pussy.
>>219600954when I burgered your sister
>>219604426>I get they were trying to make her the new M who was the complete opposite of the old guard and at odds with BondWhich was a retarded idea. "Women are in charge now!" aka Barbara Broccoli. It's meta and gay. It also doesn't make sense that she would call Bond a "misogynist dinosaur" when the dude is both younger than her and never once mistreats women in any of his films (unfortunately)
>>219604585>never once mistreats women in any of his filmsHe slapped a couple of women during the Connery era. Then the Moore era softened his character and allowed none of that stuff. 90s M spoke to Bond as if he had continued to slap women through all the years, but the truth was that Bond had been reconstructed by feminism since the 70s.
>>219604850>Then the Moore era softened his character and allowed none of that stuffHe backhands, chokes and threatens to break Andrea's arm (while putting pressure on it and saying he'll break it next) in The Man with the Golden Gun to get her to tell him where Scaramanga is.
>>219604850bro Moore in Golden Gun is the nost misogynist and cold that Bond has ever been portrayed. He makes Britt Ekland hide in his closet while he fucks another woman lmao
>>219605105spoilers!
>>219605105Okay fair enough, my memory of Moore is not so good. I don't enjoy the Moore films as much, and I skip most of them whenever I rewatch the series (apart from Moonraker, which I do like).
>>219605459>I don't enjoy the Moore films as much, and I skip most of them whenever I rewatch the series
>>219603091Die Another Day and Moonraker are both entertaining as hell
>>219605739>MoonrakerBased>Die Another DayNo bro, no.
Shot a ppk irlIts a shitty gun
>>219602875>I hope this isn't AIIt's not dw
>>219600954there was the time i rode a tsunami on an improvised kite surfing rig to safety
>>219605931It was a pretty good gun in the N64 game. And the N64 is more important than real life.
>>219605935Where's the promo pics sir
I had sex one time. Was pretty neat.
>>219600954i once sexually took advantage of a japanese woman
>>219606236>N64 is more important than real life
>>219600954>be me>just trying to do my job>some woman got uppity at me>put her in her place
When I hamburgered your sister.
>>219605931The important thing is that he can wear it under his jacket withour it ruining the lines of his suit
>>219604585In Thunderball he threatens to get his nurse fired if she doesn't sleep with him
>>219600954Took out an Asian homeless man in 1976. Was on a country road and buried him within the nearby woodlands approximately 500 yards from the road.
>>219600954i benis'd bagina
>>219605739Die Another Day is awful, faggot.
>>219604426bourbon is sweeter than other liquors because it's at least half cornat the $30 price point you can get stuff that's about as good as any bourbonand in the 90s the bourbon industry was in a slump so the distilleries would be putting fantastically good stuff in their bottles and be forced to price it cheap
I have never seen Goldeneye even though I have seen like a dozen bond movies and the other ones with Brosnan even though playing Goldeneye n64 was my childhood... wtf is wrong with me... how can I fix this problem
>>219608763Try watching Goldfinger, maybe that will help
>>219602768Still a good looking car. I hate how the front of current BMWs look.
>>219602768You have good taste, that's a great car
>>219608856erm, okay
>>219608933I hate that and the turbos the most and the buttons and screens. cars are ugly as shit now and the windows are really tiny and the hoods and doors are high as fuck the front of cars is all puffy and huge reeeeee
>>219608763go to your local thrift store and buy one of the copies of Goldeneyeand if they have Tomorrow Never Dies, get that too, it's even better
>>219612342Erm illl just download it right now for free mmkay?
>>219600954I'm a rightwing queer and I was never that involved in the "community". I went intentionally undercover to a LGBT meeting place once and learn their agenda for the next month at the time.
>>219605931Pistols are extremely funny because once you actually shoot one, you realize how inaccurate they are. Meanwhile Bond is pulling one-handed trick shots left and right. I remember the first time I show a rifle in 7th grade, with no ear protection. I was dumbfounded because I thought firearms sounded like firecrackers. My ears were ringing for a while…
>>219603580over the past couple of months, i watched every old bond up until craig. moonraker was incredibly bad. i want to call it the worst, but i can be convinced to put it as second worst (behind live and let die) for the SOLE fact that i literally laughed out, leo pointing at the screen, during the space fight. if i wanted to watch a pure comedy spy film, i would watch austin powers. moonraker accidentally jumps the shark, and thats why its bad.
I act like Sheriff JW Pepper whenever I see Asian women drivers
When I Bond Burgered your sister last night.
>>219602422Stealing from the workplace is so much fun. I love it.
>>219602422>What about the security?>Security? You’re lookin’ at it.
>>219601080why did he kill that innocent animal?
