We write an episode of “Last Week Tonight With John Oliver”
>>220197189>curtain raises>a jewish pedophile standing on stage>he opens his mouth>his teeth look like a broken beartrap>he clears his throat>"ORANGE MAN BAD"
beady eye freak
[reports about the ICE deportations][John makes an unapologetically lame joke but he yells it loudly and uses harsh language so everyone laughs anyway]
>*silhouette of a dwarf dangling from a tree is seen in the background*
>>220197324>>220197272IT'S CURRENT YEAR, PEOPLE>audience explodes into rapturous applause
>>220197399>a morbidly obese woman in the producers lounge has her third vax attack>filming of the episode continues unimpeded
>>220197189>OUR MAIN TOPIC TONIGHT, FOR THE 500TH WEEK IN A ROW CONCERNS, YET AGAIAN... DONALD DRUMPF. THE FLORIDA MAN OF PRESIDENTS!>NOW TO PUT IT MILDY, DONDALD DRUMPF AS PRRESIDENMT IS LIKE A GERBIL TRYING TO STICK RICHARD GERE UP ~*ITS*~ ASS!
>>220197189MAKE DONALD DRUMPF AGAIN
>>220197526Jesus he really is the /pol/ meme made flesh, it's actually embarrassing how pathetic he is
>>220197189>*crowd cheers as camera zooms onto the stage*>"oi oi oi oi oi!">*mr. oliver reveals a toothy grin, exposing his crooked, yellow teeth with visible cavities*>"orange man... le... BAD">*crowd goes wild*>"oi oi oi... you lot know WHY orange man bad?">*crowd murmurs*>"Bloody hell... you wankers don't know what soddin' year it is?!?">*crowd shouts: BECAUSE IT'S 2015!!*>*as the crowd laughs and cheers, Mr. Oliver nods, toothy grin exposed again, the movement from his head dislodging a gnarled yellow - almost orange - tooth, which drops onto his desk*>*he gently tweezes it between his forefingers, crowd goes silent*>*he looks at the camera and holds it up*>"Looks loik I'll be nabbin' some telly loicense dosh from da toof fairy innit!!">*crowd goes wild again*
>>220197189>SOOOOO
>>220198012kekkkkkkkkk
>>220197399>tfw current year was 13 years ago
I can't do it. I'm not smart enough.
>>220198195just imagine, they've had TDS for this long and they're going to still have it ten years from nowlmao
>>220198231The AIDS from turbo-vaxxing the trump juice will probably get them before that
>>220198383kek
>>220197272>ORANGE MAN BADi mean, he's not wrong
>>220197189Is he really that bad compared to the other Amerimutt late night comedy?Sure he's biased as fuck like the rest of them but he actually manages to be funny.
>>220198862Nah
>>220197272>canned laughter
>>220198862The other late night losers at least have guests on and try to sell you the newest hollywood slop, besides propagandizing you. Jon Oliver is just one camera and one dude and a laugh track, doing nothing but propagandizing you about one issue at a time. It's basically a youtube commentator pretending to be a late night show.
>>220198231TDS will live forever, in 50 years these lunatics will be talking about Trump like they talk about Hitler now, and elderly liberals will talk about how he walked the streets of Washington shooting immigrants in the head and laughing (I was told Hitler did this when I was a kid, HDS is real)
>>220199129If you mix 1984 and Brave New World, Jon Oliver is what Big Brother would be.
>>220199329lol that absolute rodent wishes he was ever a demagogue
>>220198931>aaaaaaand next up we have (corporation bad because they refused to bribe some abbos or some shit)>HEH HEH CORPORATION IS LIKE TRUMBPF INNIT?!?!>*canned laughter*>now u need to get vaccine or else UR RACIST IVERMECTIN HORSE PASTE GUY!!!!>roight innit? drumpf corporation bad but biden corporation good lol lmao!!!>*canned laughter*>UR SO STUPID IF U LIKE REPUBLICAN ITS LIKE, omg, ok, like so stupid u put poopie in ur food and pee pee in ur drink and you bonk self on head with hard thing because so stupid lololol ISNT TREVOR NOAH FUNNY INNIT?!?!>*zany saxophone music and canned laughter*
>>220199434the setup is there though, like you said, no guests, just him facing the camera and canned laughter. In that dystopian nightmare made manifest (which is possibly where we're headed, given they seem to be using both books as blueprints) Jon Oliver is exactly how their ideal public figure would be - an indoctrination lecture thinly disguised as entertainment nobody in their right mind could find funny.
>>220199999check'd
>>220199999damn nice digits
>>220197189Listen, America, we need to talk about a national tragedy that somehow slipped under the radar while we were all busy arguing about tariffs and tweets. Donald Trump has ruined the McDonald’s $1 menu. Yes, the sacred $1 menu—the last democratic institution where a broke college student, a hungover construction worker, and a single mom could all congregate in greasy harmony for the price of pocket change. And now? It’s gone. Obliterated. Vaporized like Trump’s promises of infrastructure week. Because apparently, when your ego is the size of a McMansion and your administration spends four years treating economic policy like a game of Monopoly where you keep landing on ‘Go Directly to the White House,’ prices creep up, wages stagnate for the people who actually flip the burgers, and suddenly that beautiful, beautiful dollar menu becomes a distant, inflationary memory.And don’t even get me started on the hypocrisy! The man spent years bragging about his McDonald’s feasts—‘I love McDonald’s, folks, the best!’—while his tariffs and trade wars jacked up the cost of everything from beef to buns to the little plastic toys that used to come with your Happy Meal. Now a McChicken costs more than a gallon of gas in some states, and Trump is out there tweeting about how great the economy was under him. Buddy, if your idea of economic greatness is making the $1 menu a $3 menu, then congratulations—you’ve successfully turned the golden arches into a golden middle finger to the working class. The only thing worse than Trump’s hair is the sad realization that even the Dollar Menu betrayed us in the end. God help us all.
>>220200185you cheated and used AI but it's still so sad and so true and therefore so funny and relevantgreat post 10/10
>>220200243Yes I did use AI and I haven’t even read it.
>>220197189>it's current yearhonestly, there is nothing I fucking hate more than a foreigner who is trying to take my guns. holy shit do I fucking HATE this faggot
>>220202083especially a foreigner from the most cuckholded shabbos goy island on the planet lmao
>>220197189I stopped watching Oliver when he sided with the sluts in Gamergate
>>220197189john is deported back to the place of his birth, erdington
>>220203400I stopped sometime around here
>>22019819511 years
>>220205178I too hate niggers
I don’t have much of a problem with this guy
>>220207375To british
>>220197189I agree with him more often than not, but his schtick gets old pretty quickly.>*asks loaded question in the most pompous way possible*>"no, because that's not how it FUCKING WORKS"Literally every show
>>220201899The irony being he recently did an episode on AI chatbots
>>220205178There was an episode where african americans were rioting / looting / vandalizing , I am unable to recollect for what. But he showed a clip of a black woman justifying the looting & vandalism as response to their social contract breaking. He further agreed and tried to normalize that it was acceptable for them to do so. I couldn't take him seriously after that
>>220209244All of his takes are so incredibly tumblr coded.
>years later chuds are still seething about the drumpf joke john won
>>220209633years later we're still laughing lmaoyour jewish overlords are not very witty
>>220198802Bernie will never be president, dude.
>>220209852>my jewish masters are better than yours.
>>220197272>Orange Retard Good!!!
>>220210370no one cares, /pol/
Why do they cause Miggers to seethe so much?
>>220210424Hi schmolo
