Expectations?
>>220458750>zoomer lifeguardsI expect them to be doing tiktok dances while people drown
>>220458750>no tattoos or piercings on any of them>all thin and attractive>no subversion that can be detected so farI'm cautiously optimistic, could be fun schlock
>Stephen Amell is HOBIE BUCHANNON, the son of Mitch Buchannon (David Hasselhoff), now a Baywatch Captain following in the footsteps of his legendary father. Hobie’s world is turned upside down when Charlie, the daughter he never knew, shows up on his doorstep, eager to carry on the Buchannon family legacy and become a Baywatch lifeguard alongside her dad and his team.
>Jessica Belkin is CHARLIE VALE, Hobie's estranged daughter who leaves her troubled home life and shows up on her father’s doorstep with one goal: to earn her place as a Baywatch lifeguard. Fearless, passionate, and occasionally reckless, Charlie has all the makings of a Buchannon legend. She has a lot to learn, however, and the father she never met might be exactly the mentor she has always needed.
>Hassie Harrison is NAT, a former foster child turned Olympic athlete who is the gold standard when it comes to lifeguarding. Brilliant, driven, and fiercely loyal, she is Hobie’s right hand and closest friend. Nat holds everyone to the same high standards she has for herself, which sometimes gets in the way of her relationships on and off the beach.
>>220458750politically correct Baywatch
I find it outrageous that in 2026 you make a show like this and don't have a single cute transgirl in the cast. There's dozens of them now, just fucking cast one. I can give you a list to choose from, she doesn't even need to act. Just make her a side character who saves some white chad (who looks like me) once in a while while making sure her crotch rubs onto him during the rescue, and have her run along the beach in slow-mo while wearing her silly little red one piece and her girl bulge is bouncing around. For fuck's sake, i'm not asking for too much..GOD !
>Brooks Nader is SELENE, the sharp-tongued Captain of the Zuma Beach lifeguards. While she is excellent at her job, she and Baywatch Captain Hobie Buchannon have a very different approach to saving lives that is a constant source of friction. Never on good terms, their relationship only goes downhill after Hobie brings his daughter Charlie Vale, onto his team and it becomes clear that their rivalry goes much deeper than lifeguarding.
>Shay Mitchell is TRINA, a former lawyer who walked away from a top-tier firm to dedicate herself to lifeguarding full-time. Passionate and dedicated, she is the sharpest mind on Baywatch and tends to follow her heart, even if she often uses her considerable intelligence to second-guess herself.
it's not finna be litty without The Rock :(
>>220458783Zoomers make me so mad I scream in my pillow and sob.
>Livvy Dunne is GRACE, a highly enthusiastic junior lifeguard.
>>220458810Jeremy Jackson was fucking robbed by Green Arrow.
>>220458750Cancellation after cameltoe.. that's about it.
>Ashley Moore is JASMINE, a rookie lifeguard with a lot of skills and even more attitude. She’s the mean girl of the beach, but there’s nobody better in a crisis.
>>220458750couldn't they find some women with tits
>>220458750where are the fucking curves on these girls??
>>2204589922010 pre oz
>>220458750Please tell me the girl to the left is Britanny Venti. Please. Even if you have to lie for me. Please.
men's beauty-standards are ridiculous relative to women's and i'm tired of pretending otherwise.
>Noah Beck is LUKE, a rookie lifeguard and the youngest in a family of firefighters, who chose the beach over the firehouse. Luke is the ultimate charming South California beach boy, surfer and flirt, but when it comes to saving lives, he is one of the best. He’s got some growing up to do, and Baywatch is a big part of that, especially his relationship with Hobie, who he sees as a mentor and a surrogate father.
Cameo prediction.I think Hasselhoff is a sure thing, but if they do something involving police, then Gregory Allan Williams is a must..
>>220459052it's >>220458987
>Luke Eisner is KOYA, Luke’s best friend among the rookies. He has some surprising and quirky depths under his surfer-boy looks.
>Thaddeus LaGrone is BRAD, a one-man rescue machine who served two tours in an elite division of the Marines before returning home to Venice Beach to care for his ailing father. Brad is fearless and incredibly strong, but his challenge on Baywatch is that lifeguarding isn’t about working alone, it’s a group effort where asking for help is a strength, not a weakness. It’s a lesson Brad will have to learn the hard way with the help of his Baywatch family.
>Kylar Miranda is DIEGO, an experienced lifeguard from East L.A., the handyman of the Baywatch team.
>>220459106> LaGroneMore like LeGroid
>>220458990No homo but Dways 'The Rock" Johnson has some creditable knockers.
>Nadia Gray as Lisa, an EMT on the team assigned to the beach. She’s a partner to the Baywatch team and friends with everyone, and has particular chemistry with one of the lifeguards.
>>220458750Why do they keep excluding the token male nignog?
>Charlie McElveen is ETHAN, a handsome and successful lawyer. He is a former colleague of Trina’s who meets with her to discuss a potential assault case on the beach. He’s dismissive towards the case despite his offer to help, and questions why Trina cares so much.
>>220458750>I'm Zayn
>>220459052Hello, Russian guy from /pol/.
>>220459106>Was a marine>can't work in a teamThe shouldn't he be dead?
>>220459155Dunno, perhaps it was made fun of too much. Anyway everyone on this dumb show will get paid (PRIORITY) and then it will evaporate.
>>220459216I don't get the reference.
>>220459155Nigger fatigue hit mainstream, you don’t see the type of 2012-2022 levels of negro coddling anymore, even places like reddit were basically calling negroes stupid apes when they complained about the Tourette's dude
>>220459259solid 0/10, you newfag
>>220458911>>220459189>Straight up just making Craig into a woman and reusing his plot from Baywatch Season 1.Also, holy shit, Parker Stevenson did not age well.
>>220458878Fag
>>220458830>>220458861ugly feet>>220458892>>220458911nice feet
>>220458750look at those crappy apartments in the background
>>220459324>baywatch in the 90s is all fake tits>baywatch in 2026 is all fake facesThe more things change, eh.
>>220458878I doubt its sanitary to get sea water into an open festering wound anon
>>220459296Still not getting what you are on about, sorry.
>>220459359perhaps this show will be worth checking out
>>220458750Bikinis > one piece swimsuits
>>220459106To be a lifeguard, don't you have to be able to swim?
>>220458878All it needs is one black guy with a winning smile and a charismatic oreo White attitudeAnd one asian chick with a Cali girl accentDiverse casting made simple and tolerableEazy peazy japaneezy
>>220459554who do you think they're going to save every week?
>>220458949LIVVYYYYYYYYYYYY
>>220458990it didn't help this movie
>>220459726made me watch it
>>220458750Hot people running.
Where are the breasts?
no mitch buchannan no watch
>>220459529If I put up one of those net circles or whatever up in my driveway will zoomer babes flock to it to play their net circle game in their underwear?
>>220458949GRAAAAACE
>>220458878There is no place in heaven for you.
>>220458783They are milennials.
>>220459106Ayo dis nigga got TITTIES
>>220459106>>220458750Why isn't the black guy on the poster?
>>220459344>>220459375>>220459581>>220459979I think it's a reasonable ask since they are all for diversity now. This is all i want, it's not that crazy
>>220460038what's the deal with trans people and shark plushies?
>>220460038who this?
>>220460066sharks are cool>>220460074eeziss
>>220460094>doesn't get fuckeddropped
beaches are tainted nowthis show will be about crackheads and gang shootings
>>220460038>nose ring
>>220460177>>220460318listen, that's not the point..that's just an example. You know what i mean
>>220459069Kinda sad Michael Newman died just two years ago. I mean he had Parkinson’s for twenty years so he probably wouldn’t have been in any shape to make more than a tiny cameo but it would have been cool
>>220458992I like a meatier girl, but I do see hips and proportions.
>>220460355
>>220460355>parkinsons for twenty yearsSkill issue. Get filtered.
>>220458992>>220460370Fat weights less than muscle, so the ideal lifeguard would be a more generously-proportioned girl. A girl who is friends, shall we say, with the cookie jar.The girls you see are only the raw material which the head lifeguard will have to work on to achieve the perfect flotation device. He will have to be a man of grit, determination and irresistable desserts.A beach architect, if you will.
>>220460355How did 32 year olds look like this in the 1980s? Was it all of the CFCs?
>>220459913>net circles or whatever
>>220459189why are there 2 lawyers
>>220458878The outrageous thing is in the era or political correctness where things are being changed on preemptive virtue signalling alone and updated for the modern era and all the subversion that comes with it; Baywatch is the show someone thought to bring back.
>>220461007Probably the falling levels of testosteroneTest ages you like crap, ask any former baby faced roider
>>220461495>ask any former baby faced roiderLiterally me. It's a difficult trade off because off cycling was awful for me, but on cycle I felt fucking incredible both physically and mentally.