>guy shows up and asks if he wants to come to jerusalem to like find god or what ever, "btw im ur dad lol">"No I... have to kill a priest first". Kills priest.>Decides Jerusalem is a good idea after all>authorities come to collect him, gets a bunch of honorable men killed defending him rather than just attoning for his sins right then and there>gets to Jerusalem and IMMEDIATELY fucks some guys half lepper wife and king's sister despite supposedly being a mourning widower>gets offered to save Jerusalem by marrying the whore princess, says no>her husband gets a bunch of people killed and starts the war everyone knew he would>guy gets a bunch more people killed trying to defend some town, is spared as only survivor>Rallies everyone in Jerusalem to die to muslims for 3 days>THEN, and ONLY THEN surrenders Jerusalem back to the muslims>Goes back home to France to resume life as a blacksmith with his dead dad's ex-girlfriend >"Heh, no king of England, I'm just a blacksmith." What did Ridley Scott mean by this?
They ruined this movie with the mask-off reveal. I was just counting down, knowing full well they were going to go there.
>>220469950it's a very jewish movie
>>220469950Orlando Bloom's acting is atrocious and his character is annoying, and the movie is too politically correct, but the director's cut is still kino despite all the flaws.
>>220473150well it is about the jews homeland
>noooooo the story doesn't make sense!!>noooooo Orlando Bloom can't act!!>noooooo it's not historically accurate!!I couldn't care less faggot. The "Jerusalem has come" scene is more kino than anything most directors have ever made and Ridley Scott is /ourguy/
>>220469950If I take off that mask...
>>220469950>btw im ur dad lolHow many people has Liam Neeson said this to?
>>220469950Given how the real crusades went, this guy sounds more functional than most of the actual crusaders.
Only thing I remember from that movie is the germanic dude with insane aura
>>220469950>Man in grieving>Finds hope>Finds love>Finds god>Chooses life>Goes back home>Everything is more or less the same>But no blue/grey lens filterIt's kino
I'm very torn about kingdom of heaven. On one hand, I love the crusades setting, something we basically never ever get to see presented in film. The set design and cinematography are top notch as well. Overall just a very cool appearanceBut on the other hand, the movie oozes with Scott's hamfisted fedora-tipping soapbox bullshit, with all the positively-presented main characters acting as secular humanist mouthpieces for Scott. And of course Orlando Bloom, as always just completely sucks like in every other role he's ever played.
>>220473209>this was promised to us 3000 years ago goy heh
>>220469950>I hate your religion and think it's bullshit and also I want you dead>noooo but you have to agree with me because I'm definitely arguing in good faithsinners stay mad
>>220474922they have been living there for more than 3000 years retard. the jews founded that city. its their rome and mecca. everyone with little bronze age knowledge know this
>>220469950Rare good medieval movie and also makes gay Christlarpers seethe. 10/10
>>220469950Yeah the film is fucking garbage but it looks great. Unironically just turn your brain off.
>>220478157dafuq are you talking about? there were already people there that they conquered. have you not heard of Canaan and the battle of Jericho?
I thought the muslims were the bad guys? Why in this movie are they the good guys?
>>220478347all religious groups are just a different breed of bad guys, the way it has always been
>>220478347They’re really not. Saladin is just portrayed as an honorable(ish) leader who knows his own empire is going to fade after his death when his selfish shithead successors take over.
>>220478386what a brainlet take
>>220478319>and the battle of Jerichomore like jerichode
>>220478347Because of western masochism. For whatever reason, we have allowed bad faith actors to distort and vilify our history, we pretend like it was an accident that it was in the west that slavery was first outlawed and eradicated, that it was in the west where individual rights emerged, that it's in the west where the defeated in a conflict aren't tortured, raped and wiped out.
>>220479044>outlawing and eradicating slaveryThat was largely due to Christianity though wasn't it? That emerged from the Middle East I'm sure.
>>220478157The Hebrews came out of the desert and killed the Canaanites living there after the bronze age collapse, historylet.
>>220479141Christianity is part of it, but it's more than that, it's the interface between Christianity, the philosophies of the ancient Greeks and Rome and finally the values born out of the European conflicts between England, France and what is now Germany. There aren't much in the religious texts of Christianity that speaks against slavery, nor is there in Judaism and the Islamic ones outright endorse it. Should also be noted, Christianity was really born well over 300 years after Jesus death with the Bible being put together proper, with some sections taken out and others included, with editing. And that happened in the Roman empire, where Catholicism was born. It's why still to this day the Vatican is in Italy, because the true birth of Christianity really happened in Europe, not in the Middle East.
>>220473952Based Jouko Ahola enjoyer
>>220478319>>220479228the semites are native to that region. before them only neanderthals lived there. >canaanitethats what jews called themselves back then>hebrewwhat egyptians call them back thenin conclusion, they were the same people. its just the group of semites that wanted to force the cult of yehweh on every other semites there won
>>220478177Nobody loves you
>>220479724not even jesus? i thought he loved eveybody
>>220479228The archaeological record disagrees. We have tons of tablets from Levantine cities during Bronze Age Collapse, especially Ugarit. We also have Ramses's inscriptions about the Sea Peoples (Mycenaean Greeks). None of them mention anything about a group of outsiders other than the Greeks (who became the Philistines) invading and conquering Canaan. Jericho was destroyed and uninhabited long before Bronze Age Collapse. Megiddo collapsed but not by any visible Semitic invasion, more just civilizational decay, the way Manchuria has a birthrate of like 0.3 right now because of Chinese deindustrialization and the cities are just withering away. Crime in those cities may rise, and buildings may get filled with bullet holes, and earthquakes may topple buildings or fires may melt neighborhoods, making the place look like it was conquered.Like with the Iliad, we should celebrate the fact that the Bible is a product of human imagination and creativity, and that it is normative, not just descriptive. It's more impressive that a civilization weaved a tale that encapsulated their culture and philosophy and worldview, rather than just writing down robotically what happened.
>>220479915mmh so much text e not gon read, cool tho
>>220479947it's 9 sentences brainlet
