Luke, did I ever tell you about Sebulba?
Pod racer?
>>220507050poodoo
his hands were his feet and his feet were his hands. it was disgusting Luke
>>220507145wonder how foot fetishists would feel about this on a woman
>>220507050>Last time we fought on that barren moon and you threw all those rocks at me and then cut open my helmet but now I am the Master
>>220507244kek
>Luke, did your aunt and uncle ever tell you about the time your parents visited the farm along with the two robots they just purchased and apparently don't recognize?
only the OT is canon
>>220507244glad they finally resolved that one. imagine being a child in 1977, leaving the cinema and not knocking about their rock-throwing contest. you'd just have to ASSUME things.
>A Gungan?>Yes well it's a kind of long eared frog thing that lives on Naboo
>Glad you bought R2 instead of one of those awful R5 units, Luke. Did you know that they're the shittiest droids in the galaxy? It can't be that the R5 unit that blew up was poorly-maintained by the Jawas or anything, it's that the entire line of R5 droids is totally worthless, just like that one that blew up! Much like how all Rodians are bounty hunters and lowlives like Greedo, or how all Dugs and Hutts are slimy asshole criminals. Fucking space-niggers. We should've picked our own space-cotton instead of allowing them to immigrate. Close the space-borders and outlaw Dug marriages.>Wait, where was I? Oh right, the R5 droid. Anyway, that one that blew up was Skippy the Jedi Droid, the most important Jedi Droid in the Galaxy. He was a good friend.
>ah yes, the Clone Wars>I was sent to investigate where the clones came from because someone ordered the creation of a clone army to fight a robot army and went through a lot of trouble to covering this up. Nobody bothered to ask where this army would come from, for some reason. Anyway, I went to this water planet with these tall, white, sensual looking creatures who managed to clone millions of soldiers. And you know the damnedest thing about these clones, Luke? They were all copies of the galaxy's most famous bounty hunter, Jango Fett, who had previously tried to kill your mother. To wrap up this story, the Clone Wars were actually quite dull and a complete waste of time so don't bother asking me about it even though I brought it up
i dont even like star wars but read every pasta of 'and he was a good friend'
>>220507862>Ben, who paid for the clones and where did they source the money from?
