WE ARE BACK. Pull yourself up by your bootstraps and diss your Terry, it's time for OREGON TRAIL BITCHESPrev Thread>>735730716
>>735766441For people who wish it, there is a stream set up for your viewing "Pleasure". I will not be interacting with people in the stream except to occasionally pull up menus or items they want to see or read, I will be interacting with the thread because that's its purpose and for fun. The stream itself might suck because there will be long pauses while we wait for anons to make decisions. It'll be good for music, seeing animations, and thats about it. So utilize it if you wish. https://www.twitch.tv/vtheoregontrail
>>735766576WHEN LAST WE LEFT OUR HEROES: In order of who has had the most impact>Father Pucci didn't do muchFather Pucci upped his med skill, and proceeded to.....do not much. He failed his plant search, and has been blending quite a bit into the background. What is his game plan? >Firewater HagHolding hands like a gaylord with Father Pucci, she has been sticking close to the background as well and going by mostly unnoticed. We came upon some berries again and the hag was given a chance to NOT make a complete and total fool of herself, only to DO THE EXACT FUCKING THING SHE DID THE FIRST TIME, and faceplant. I guess you can't teach an old Hag new tricks, and she's currently on thin ice. >Ojou-Sama remains beautiful and excellent at Jew powersThe first of our power team has proven an adept tongue waggler, able to haggle down successfully almost every single time. The best part? She does it for fun! We can never afford items to trade, so she's essentially honing her silver tongue for better ventures.
I didn't know there was a 3D remake of Oregon Trail.
This early?
>>735766986There will be a thread at 9pm too, as per usual. My days off are thursday friday so we can play longer. >>735766946Welcome to the thread! This new version is woke and crazy. Read up on our heroes and pick your favorite to root for and hiss against.
>>735766869OUR MAIN MAN HIMSELF, TYRONEHas there ever been an Oregon Trail character with higher highs or lower lows than this one?After contracting typhoid, breaking his leg, and losing all morale he abandoned the party.....
>>735767205Our FUARKING hero.
>>735767205ONLY TO RETURN STRONGER THAN EVERThere was some speculation that he might be a runaway slave and was avoiding the town to avoid capture. But on his triumphant return, he was miraculously HEALED OF ALL ailments! He is in fact now the healthiest member of the troop! After seeing the prices in town though, I have but one dreadful conclusion: Tyrone left the party, stole a shit ton of money, went to the doctor and barber and got himself fixed up and came back. Genuinely? Genius. He didn't use our own coffers and came back more useful than ever. This is it, Tyrone fags. Mark my words. He has PEAKED.
>>735767401Our current stats if any fags need to see it. Food consumed, money spent, etc.
>>735767494So here we go! Friendly reminder: If you want meme old school /v/ chaos with nothing but grandfather clocks in the future, we have to successfully reach Oregon with this crew to unlock the clocks to buy. It also unlocks the "Oregon or Bust" Journey which is a harder difficulty which undoubtedly create more chaos. We also need to complete separate Journeys, something we can experiment today as a break if we wish later.
>>735767637That sounds pretty gay. How did they make it bloat so much.
>>735767637First up is critter camp! We did this last night, but this is apparently a new one!
>>735767724its made by gameloft. They bloat their fucking games like crazy with """"CONTENT"""""
>>735767729Everyone is pretty well rested, just go.
>>735767729Sure camp.
>>735767729You can >set up camp>leave>learn about campingEveryone except Tyrone still has typhoid as well. >>735767842>>735767850Gonna need a consensus bitches
>>735767892Just go then I changed my mind.
>>735766441Damnit, just as I have to leave. ;_;>>735767729Camp. If we can share other peoples' stories as our own, we'll be able to get more stuff that way (if we come across another tales camp).
>>735767892FUCK I need to remember to add images. >Hag has four days of typhoid>Pucci 13 days>Ojou-Sama 8 days
>>735767927>>735767842And we are moving on. Please select the next leg. The middle is berries, the top and bottom are hunting. The top also has a soldier to collect but we have no cloth or medicine to help him, so that might be a waste of time for that side quest (You can't complete every side quest). Also if you pick hunting for foxes its gonna be bad because I can't hit them.
>>735768060Deer! We gotta eat!
>>735767960How much meds do we have, maybe they can heal the priest from his typhoid.
did they fucking turn oregon trail into slay the spire?! what the fuck
>>735768060Berries, so the priest can show the hag how to pick berries. Maybe she'll learn that way, given how close they seem to be.
>>735768060North I want to know the fox is supposed to be. Furfaggotry?
>>735768108We have 1 medicine. Should we use it on the priest?
>>735768215sure
>>735768215Nah I thought they had more.
>>735768197Its merely hunting for pelts. The deer would be better ammo spent cause i am TRASH At the mini game. If we want food we would be better served by the deer.
>>735768060>>735768215Can't we use herbs to heal typhoid as well?
>>735768278Yes we can, sorry I did not see it in the corner. Herbs or medicine, and who do we use it on? Pucci?
>>735768260>>735768247
>>735768273>>735768197I change my mind, go south for deer.
>>735768357Father
>>735768401We are now going to deer. >>735768447I will use the herbal on Father after this exciting event!
>>735768501
>>735768536Look, but don't eat Tyrone
Fuck realized I cropped out the OPTIONS:>inspect them>gather them>leave
>>735768536>>735768689Let Tyrone look into this shroom shit.
>>735768719>>735768658He lost some hygiene touching those disgusting mushrooms and told us to stay away
>>735768787Is it time for our certified Animal Serial Killer to do this thing? Watch the stream if you want to see how hard I SUCK at this mini game
>>735768884Tyrone's got this. Maybe another time when we have more food we can let Father or Hag try.
>>735768884Tyrone finna bag 200lbs of meat.
>>735768967Not quite.
>>735769075BUT he did manage to take it all back with him. Do we skin them?
>>735769127Hell yeah. Knives are for pussies.
>>735769075Good enough.>>735769127Yes.
>>735769196Knives are for chads, but only chads who play the BITTER WINTER journey.
>>735769206Now we can go south for grass for our oxen or north for MYSTERY NIGGAS
>>735769328Go north.
>>735769328upper
>>735769369>>735769395Who can resist a MYSTERY BOX? We now have an opportunity to make a wagon tongue! Also, Firewater Hag is over her typhoid, but it's hard to be excited about that.
>>735769458Hag!
>>735769458Firehag, since there's no knowledge of what her stat is.
>>735769593>>735769559Well she lost some energy and is generally another big L. OH NO! Tyrone caught typhoid from Pucci!
Should we wash?
>>735769652Meds on Tyrone now, let the priest do it as for repentance.
>>735767724They saw Death Road to Canada and decided they wanted Oregon Trail to be like that
>>735769716we will definitely use meds as soon as we are able, we have to decide if we want to camp and wash first.
>>735769696yeah Tyrone is a dirty boy.
>>735769696Yeah wash up or they're going get Typhoid again at this rate.
>>735769852we washed up and the meds only took five days of typhoid off tyrone unfortunately
My clown:)
>>735769934Uh oh whats in our wagon?
>>735769963Shes looking pretty typhoided up anon, well done! ART is always appreicated!
>>735769973Death
>>735769973>>735770041It might be the end for Father Pucci. I used his meds "Off camera" for Tyrones typhoid (worth it) but now what do we do? >suck out venom>treat without meds
>>735770112Succ
>>735770112Hag will suck it out. They're close and she's got to have a talent.
>>735770112Tyrone suck that shit out.
>>735770189>>735770192>>735770198looks like someone is succcing but its gotta be Tyrone or the Hag....and we need a consensus!
>>735770221Hag.
>>735770263>>735770192>>735770189Look at this bitch, second guessing US, her GODS
>>735770290whoops heres the image
>>735770326Yeah it is
>>735770326DO IT HAG.
>>735770326DO IT!
>>735770403>>735770376>>735770353
>>735770438It's venom not poison tho
>>735770438Retarded hag fucking swallowed it lmao
>>735770438Well, she has a fever now and all her stats took a major hit. But who cares! Everyone already has typhoid anyway. We are now at Jewsburg!
>>735770534Welcome to Jewsburg! A wooden Saloon is in view apparently (All I see are teepees.) You can >talk>trade>Store>Services>Rest
>>735770635The lost tribe!?
>>735770635The services are Barber, Doctor and wagon repair. The store has more of the same available. We have 149 lb of food and only 36$ to spare. For trading we can sell pelts to make some money, and these are the trades on offer.
>>735770635Talk, that's the invention shit we came for right?
>>735770749We need traps ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
This soundtrack's kicking ASS!
>>735770759Correct, this is also apparently a temporary Arapaho settlement outside Jewsburg proper?
>>735770749Talk and then sell pelts. Then get medicine.
>>735770835The one we are listening to is my favorite. It has a great pioneer suspense to it. Part of why I wanted to stream it was so everyone could enjoy the music.
>>735770865A wise plan.
>Black Bank Agent in JewsburgIs he a Black Hebrew Israelite?
Less' do Peppard.
>>735770980Its incredibly undeniable. He has a Ojou-Sama clone with him though. Now Samuel Peppard is the one who fell out of the sky, and the other is the guy who had the same idea. We can mention one or the other, and maybe tank the business idea for the other one?
>>735771060peppard, he's not a cheat
>>735771121Nice to see the HAG do something useful for once.
Grab a partner, dosi-do! YEEEEEEEEHAAAAWWWW!
>>735771165Looks like we got real RPG choices to make! >>735771178This is Peppards theme. Mary has her own cute theme I like better than his.
>>735771165Hag doing her bf a solid, that's adorable.
>>735771178
>>735771234flying machine
Well, I guess since the flying machine seems to be all the rage here....Jeez, what next? MOVING pictures?!
>>735771234The Wind wagon is more plausible but let's make the flying machine dream come true.
>>735771250You have been pushing this scandalous pairing for all the threads now. But I have to admit, with Firehag piping up here, you might be onto something. >>735771308>>735771303We can do it but it won't work, remember the engine? He seemed more excited about the wind wagon, should we try that?
>>735771363>>735771303>>735771308Well we have no choice.
>>735771438Well they shot down the flying idea but we have another chance at the wind wagon!
>>735771392I'm the 2nd guy pushing this ship now the original anon convinced me.>>735771480>They didn't believe.Fucking jews only accepting absolutes, go for the Wind Wagon.
>>735771558
>>735771593Perhaps we will run into the black jewish banker in the future again!
Damn, Rose getting shafted.
>>735771631Alright Firewater Hag did her beaux a solid and they are ALL IN on wind wagon (what a dumb concept). We can now>TRADE>SERVICES>REST>STORE>DEPARTWe have 31$ and like 150lb of food. What will ye do.
>>735771760Make like a tree.
>>735771760go
>>735766441wtf is this zoomie game?
>>735771760Sell the pelts, let Ojou-sama haggle.
>>735771821But we can sell our pelts! And buy more bullets or medicine! OR REST
>>735771851I was with you but the THREAD HAS SPOKEN AND WE LEAVING
>>735771847it's a remake of uncslop
>>735771909South for berry picking that the Hag can fuck up or north for MYSTERY NIGGAS
MYSTERY BOX
>>735771964I kind of want berries, but sure mystery
>>735771964Go north for mystery niggas.
>>735772049>>735772026We are on our way to mystery! Ojou-Sama has recovered from typhoid and now THIS
>>735772089Tyrone says this might be a trap and I can't believe we have the third option.
>>735772138wakey wakey eggs and bakey.
>>735772138Wake that man up, his ominous aura forbids anything else.
>>735772138Wake Up Dead Man (2025)
>>735772138WAKE UP GRAB A BRUSH AND PUT ON A LITTLE MAKE UP
>>735772194>>7357722024chan DIDNT want to rob him? Well kick my balls and call me trans. WHO Should wake him up?
Wait how did Tyrone recontract Typhoid?
>>735772281Tyrone, I can't imagine anyone in the 19th Century wouldn't want to see a black man as soon as they wake up.
>>735772281Ojou-sama, can't let her just do haggling.>>735772326The priest gave it to him.
>>735772281Ojiu-Sama should, a pretty woman is a nice sight to wake up to.
>>735772326He caught it from Father Pucci randomly. Guess that dirty old priest is molesting the party and giving em typhoid. It's actually very contagious. We could be passing it around between members all the rest of the game. >>735772380>>735772368Oh you make a good point but Ojou-Sama won.
>>735772281Father
>>735772412>>735772380
>>735772527
>>735772527>inb4 he dead
>>735772554Hey I know what the pony express is, despite only lasting a few years every fucking kid in America has to learn about it.
>>735772596HE NOT
>>735772621
Well, we GOTTA give a hand to our mailmen. After all, they control the mail, they control INFORMATION!
>>735772671Despite having an injun, the black man knows these lands the best.
>>735772671Sure why not?
>>735772693Don't forget he isn't just the mail, he's the pony express. He's basically the internet of 1849! And yeah, Tyrone is doing it.
>>735772783Tyrone succeeded at directions.
>>735772839ded
>>735772839....and we got another fucking harmonica
>>735772887Oh well. SCARY STICK AHEAD
>>735772923
Bro, Tyrone has been a LIFESAVER.
>>735772968Tyrone got to save the day again.
>>735772968Ojou just to learn what she's got.
Tetris ass inventory
>>735772968Ojou
>>735773019Tyrone has grown a lot since the first days fuck ups. >>735773037>>735773064Its always a classic Tyrone fag versus Ojou Sama fag. BUT OJOU WINS AGAIN OHOHOH! Turns out she had 2 all along and skillfully repaired it! We are back on the trial and I used two tool boxes to repair some damage. AND ITS BERRY PICKING TIME AGAIN
>>735773258These are different than the HAGS medicine tumbles, Tyrone actually has the best chance of this.
>>735773258Get pickin' Firehag. Don't let this fookin' slip
Let's get Pucci. He's been slackin'.
>>735773312Make Father do it because he doesn't do anything.
>>735773312Well, it's not cotton, so it's not offensive to ask Tyrone to pick it... right?
>>735773402>>735773370Pucci wins! Literally! He got another wayfinding point as well!
>>735773475His biggest win yet
>>735773475HUNTING TIME. We can get valuable buffalo pelts too
Ojou-sama. Gun lady.
>>735773528Maybe hag is a killer?
>>735773559Looks like they have enough meat for now, let hag do the hunting. Maybe she's good at that.
>>735773658I'm fucking retarded meant to reply to this. >>735773528
>>735773730Fret not. You don't need to reply to my posts to make them valid. The hag could barely carry anything back so this was a bust.
>>735773809She did hunt a lot though BEAST
LEFT OR RIGHT, MAX?!
>>735773809We can now go north or south. North has grass and south has fish but I don't think we have any bait.
>>735773847I guess north then.
>>735773809She's a killer.>>735773847Go north.
>>735773906We went north and may I present Bitchywitchy?
>>735773971
>>735773971Anything 4 u babe;)
>>735774018Fish traps so we can go fishing.
>>>/vr/
>>735773971I think it's Baywatcheatcheese.>>735774018Blankets sounds good.
>>735774018show me ur meat blach
Iiiiiiiii'm gonna say meat
>>735774018>25$ for 5 blankets>30 for 150lbs of meat>15$ or 22 bullets for fish traps>30$ for 6 pelts
>>735774142>>735774140we have 226lbs of food, lots of meat!
>>735774143fish traps then
>>735774096This is the modern version of Oregon trail, nice try tho
>>735774143does she take payment in harmonicas?
>>735774143226lbs of meat is enough, blankets.
>>735774206>>735774067We took her fish traps and asked about her destination.>>735774270I fucking wish. I'm gonna use one next chance we get.
>>735774305Well thats real nice bitchywitchy. Unfortunately here in the FUTURE, we know how it turns out.
>>735774354It's a good thing she cute
>>735774380
>>735774407ask
>>735774407We asked about him because I don't expect everyone to pick this choice anyway and its CONTENT
>>735774354hahaha yeah.>>735774407ask.
>>735774453A dog!
>>735774521Pascal the dog is here.
Keep the dog only if we got enough for a fifth member.
>>735774521approach with father
>>735774521it's a weiner!
>>735774616I love animals (not so much dogs) but this is important so we going with first choices.
>>735774694feed em
>>735774694Feed it there's enough food.
Yo where da owners at?!
>>735774717>>735774747Done, we can do more interactions.
>>735774779pet
>>735774779Pet then ask about the owners.
>>735774806>>735774779We pet him and asked where is owner is (no response, it's a dog) and had to leave. Dog said goodbye to us. THEN DISASTER STRIKES AGAIN
>>735774870shit
>>735774870Uh oh we might be fucked.
>>735774910WE HAVE OPTIONS while stranded! >Search for food (we have 189 lbs)>attempt to repair the wagon>send for help>inspect the area>make camp
PUCCICHADS WE BACKNew wheel
>>735774910who the fuck was driving?
>>735774870Toolboxes do they have any?
>>735775009we out. I used em to repair the wagon so shit wouldn't fall out. The options here>>735774972are all we can do right now.
>>735775009>>735774985>>735774982Game is stuck until we decide one of these options niggers
>>735775053Priest repair the wagon.
>>735775125get help
>>735775170I sent Pucci out. We had to do SOMETHING. If he pulls this off....
Kek Pucci did the virgin walk
>>735775262Who will fashion the wheel?
>>735775306Tyrone or Ojousama again. I trust Tyrone.
>>735775306Father he got the wood
fine ojou then
>>735774985it's a self-driving cart, like Tesla, that's why it keeps getting fucked up by every odd pebble on the road
>>735775517>>735775378Shit she tried
>>735775564
>>735775614BACK WHERE WE STARTED
get help?
>>735775665
>>735775717Father
>>735775717Our FUCKING hero Tyrone better not fuck this up.
>>735775752Father Pucci has left the party
>>735775796oh thank christ he made it. I didn't want to lose Tyrone.
>>735775847Whichever gripefag was in the last thread who asked when someone would help us, your stock just went up
>>735775880The wagon wheel has been replaced and we have hit the promised grass land. Do we stop and let our oxen enjoy it?
>>735775958They had enough rest when the wagon broke keep going.
>>735775958sure why not
fine go
>>735776052>>735775993Firewater hag going to imagine an illness now after getting over her fever.
>>735776143We aren't going to fall for this wild goose chase AGAIN are we???
>>735776175fuck off tyrone
>>735776175Tyrone I like you but stop with these fictional plants nigga.
>>735776270>>735776210We moving ON. Also the priest has his BRAP cloud around him again. He needs to clean up.
>>735776308
>>735776308how does he get so dirty?
>>735776376He's a priest, nuff said. Welcome to Courthouse Rock! You may:>TALK>TRADE>REST>DEPART
>>735776376Did you miss the part where padre ran half-marathon to get us new a wheel?
>>735776412talk then trade
>>735776412Some options you might like: We can SELL OUR PELTS for shekels we might need we only have 21$. I will check the trades available and report back. >>735776460I checked the TALK and no one had anything of interest to say. The bigger rock is the one called Courthouse Rock and the smaller is jail rock, fyi.
>>735771480IIRC those actually existed during the time period
>>735776535The toolboxes might be mighty useful. We can haggle with all these people and try to get better deals too. Haggling is free and basically a free stat booster so I think we should do it, but I am ever /v/s humble servant.
>>735776617Toolboxes then sell the pelts.
>>735776605I thought they rode on rocks......
>>735776663Sold the pelts and then went for the toolboxes and screwed up. Should have given him the pelts first as per your suggestion. Sorry! Anyway, do we want to trade 2 meds for them?
>>735776617we still good on food?
>>735776823We have 129 lbs of food and I wouldn't trade it if we didn't need to. The wagon is still useable the toolboxes would just be nice.
>>735776809Why not the party is somehow getting drugs on trail.
>>735776875Alright. Traded the meds for the toolboxes. I will repair the wagon when next having a chance. Should we RESTor DEPART
>>735776943rest.
>>735777084Algiht we rested and firewater hag got exhausted, then fucking caught typhoid from Tyrone. Told you we'd be passing that shit around. Should we rest another day or depart>>735777084
>>735777206eh, we departed
>>735777272Onto chimney rock!
>>735777318North for deer meat and pelts or south for MYSTERY NIGGAS
>>735777351up for achievement
>>735777351deer for route rewards
>>735777437We will go up and get it going then I'm going to take a break. I'll come back in 3 hours at 5pm PST.
>>735777437>>735777481
>>735777569Not medicine berries again. What will ye do /v/
>>735777607inspect first
>>735777680Who should inspect the berries?
>>735777763Father
>>735777789He did it, and said they are safe to eat. Tyrone was a pessimist so I used a fucking harmonica to cheer him up. NOW LOOK!
>>735777905
>>735777905How is he beating us? How is everyone beating us?
>>735777941
>>735777962nigga we stop and rest CONSTANTLY. Meanwhile, FIREWATER FAGS nows your chance!
>>735778039
>>735778076Spoiler alert: A tornado literally formed out of the heavens, destroyed his sail wagon and dissipated while everyone watched. God hates this faggot.
>>735778076>inb4: wrecks himself
>>735778130
>>735778163BUT we can now buy a wind wagon! Should we try to purchase this new fangled tech at the next settlement?
>>735778163the Lord giveth, the Lord taketh away
>>735778214we're broke as shit
>>735778214Alright last event and then I'm taking a 3 hour break.
>>735778290
>>735778323
>>735778347we can>speak with the indian>speak with the soldierWhat will /v/ do, the indian is demanding a toll.
>>735778347>>735778378USA USA USA Don't pay for shit.
>>735778378talk to the soldier
>>735778436>>735778479Hey its that guy Bitchywitchy was talking about!
>>735778505Someone white powering up in this bitch
>>735778553He does make a fair point. How can people sign the treaty if they can't afford to cross the land to sign it? BUT WE KNOW WHAT HAPPENS IN THE FUTURE
>>735778631OOOH We get to decide what happens! >Side with the soldier>Side with the indian>Speak to the indian or the soldier again
>>735778702Speak with Mato maybe we can convince him to let those related to the signing in.
>>735778762
>>735778702more talking now, they can kill each other later
>>735778801
>>735778837
>>735778837talk to the soldier then
>>735778837Kill him for anti white slur
>>735778837>>735778875
>>735778702>taxation on roads>its a fucking animal trailside with US soldier, shoot the injuns, and build a 12 lane highway.
>>735778885This game is gonna need some mods with more realistic and edgy shit. Anyway, speaking to the soldier again and he says the same stuff. We have to side with either the indian or the soldier. >>735778945FIRST POST BEST POST. WHO Should convince the indian to let us all pass for free?
>>735779024Hag she has a funny name too
>>735779072SHE DID IT. She must have used her Indian privilege lets be real here.
>>735779141>>735779072Damn, maybe I need to give her more credit. Not only did she jew him out of having to pay, she got him to THANK US FOR IT TOO. Is....is Firewater Hag surging?
>>735779205
>>735779238>words words words words words
>>735779263Whatever, we are back on the trail! Time for a break! I'll be back around 5pm PST to either play a few hours or all the way til 9 and later. Here are the finishing stats for this thread! See you in awhile!
>>735779349Thanks!
>>735779349>6 hours>5% indaaamn, we in for a long haul
>>735779410INDEED. We have only 27% of the Journey to Oregon done on this sole play!
>Firehag managed to outjew the tollAll of our party members are godlike wtf.
