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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bru_uQeE5ZA

After so long, the Tails Gets Owned count finally gets an update: we're now at an eye-watering 58!

Also, RE-ENTER the goat licker and Keith Page!

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And, thanks to Tails getting dissed and captured on the same page, the TGO count is now a nice round 60!

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TGO: 61

Also, EXIT the goat-licker and Keith Page

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2AiQG9dmW8M

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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Discovery_of_the_tomb_of_Tutankhamun#Discovery

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Getting saddled with this cunt definitely bumps the TGO to 62

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ENTER this owlhoot!

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TGO: 63

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TGO: 64

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https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/make-a-pig-s-ear-of

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Yeah, for some reason this story was printed after Porker joined Knuckles on the Floating Island. Not the most egregious lack of syncopation from StC, but still a bit weird.

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TGO: 65

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ENTER the baddest bitch of them all, and her butler!

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TGO: 66

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Will Knuckles and Plunder survive the wrath of the Tantaragor? Will Porker Lewis recover from the traumatic things he experienced on The Miracle Planet? Will the anon who likes to chronicle the top 10s from Review Zone cope after reading this thread?

Find out on Monday, with more StC!

>>12368806
So long to the top 10 chart for master system games. It did well to survive until april 96.

Mega Drive

Micro Machines: Turbo Tournament '96 98% (StC 68)
Micro Machines 95% (StC 5)
= FIFA International Soccer 95% (StC 20)
Earthworm Jim 94% (StC 42)
= Micro Machines 2: Turbo Tournament 94% (StC 45)
Street Racer 93% (StC 58)
F1 92% (StC 14)
= Davis Cup World Tour 92% (StC 16)
= Super Street Fighter II 92% (StC 36)
= The Jungle Book 92% (StC 39)
= Mega Swiv 92% (StC 49)
Dune II: Battle for Arrakis 91% (StC 28)
= Pete Sampras Tennis 91% (StC 31)
= Sylvester and Tweety in Cagey Capers 91% (StC 40)
= Urban Strike 91% (StC 41)
= Mickey Mania: The Timeless Adventures of Mickey Mouse 91% (StC 42)
= Sonic & Knuckles 91% (StC 43)
= NBA Jam Tournament Edition 91% (StC 50)
= Comix Zone 91% (StC 60)
Fantasic Dizzy 90% (StC 9)
= Street Fighter II: Special Champion Edition 90% (StC 10)
= Aladdin 90% (StC 10)
= Cosmic Spacehead 90% (StC 12)
= The Incredible Hulk 90% (StC 35)
= Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story 90% (StC 36)
= The Lion King 90% (StC 42)
= Wayne Gretzky and the NHLPA All-Stars 90% (StC 57)
= Pete Sampras Tennis '96 90% (StC 68)
= FIFA Soccer 96 90% (StC 70)
Zoop! 89% (StC 66)
Bubsy in Claws Encounters of the Furred Kind 88% (StC 8)
= Ren & Stimpy: Stimpy's Invention 88% (StC 18)
= Skitchin' 88% (StC 26)
Chuck Rock II: Son of Chuck 87% (StC 14)
= General Chaos 87% (StC 21)
= James Pond 3 87% (StC 25)
= Castlevania: The New Generation 87% (StC 25)
= The Smurfs 87% (StC 48)
= Judge Dredd 87% (StC 57)

Sonic 3 didn't get a rating when it was reviewed in StC 19, but given S&K's and Sonic CD's scores we can intuit that it would've gotten at least 91%, with S&K getting at least 92% instead
>>12368898
S-Senpai noticed me?

But yeah, kinda crazy that they went months with no Review Zone... not that Sega were really hitting it out of the park at this point

32X

The Scottish Open* 91% (StC 50)
Knuckles' Chaotix 88% (StC 54)

*never commercially released on the 32X, eventually became Virtual Golf on the Saturn

Sega CD

Combat Cars 93% (StC 14)
= Sensible Soccer CD 93% (StC 31)
= Thunderhawk 93% (StC 32)
Soulstar 91% (StC 26)
Sonic CD 90% (StC 15)
= Ecco the Dolphin 90% (StC 15)
Battlecorps 86% (StC 26)
Batman Returns 85% (StC 2)
= Silpheed II 85% (StC 15)
Star Wars: Rebel Assault 78% (StC 44)
Road Avenger 75% (StC 1)
= Final Fight 75% (StC 2)
= Night Trap 75% (StC 2)
= Afterburner III 75% (StC 3)
= Robo Aleste 75% (StC 8)
= Sherlock Holmes: Consulting Detective Vol. II 75% (StC 11)
= Prize Fight 75% (StC 20)
= Yumemi Mystery Mansion 75% (StC 37)
Make My Video: INXS 70% (StC 7)
Joe Montana's NFL Football 65% (StC 17)
Time Gal 60% (StC 4)
>>12369146
tbf Sega were on their third console by that point, and only weirdos gave a damn about 8-bit games by 1996

Master System

Micro Machines 92% (StC 21)
Masters of Combat 90% (StC 14)
= Road Rash 90% (StC 24)
Sonic Chaos 85% (StC 12)
= The Jungle Book 85% (StC 22)
= Aladdin 85% (StC 23)
The Flash 80% (StC 3)
= Wonder Boy in Monster World 80% (StC 4)
= Buggy Run 80% (StC 16)
Dino Basher 76% (StC 22)
Sega World Tournament Golf 75% (StC 6)
= Home Alone 75% (StC 9)
= Deep Duck Trouble Starring Donald Duck 75% (StC 16)
Ottifants 70% (StC 12)
GP Rider 65% (StC 5)
= Road Runner 65% (StC 11)
PGA Tour Golf 54% (StC 15)

Game Gear

Micro Machines 92% (StC 21)
Ernie Els Golf 90% (StC 45)
= Road Rash 90% (StC 24)
Sonic the Hedgehog: Triple Trouble 87% (StC 43)
Dropzone 86% (StC 38)
Ecco the Dolphin 85% (StC 9)
= Battletoads 85% (StC 11)
= Sonic Chaos 85% (StC 12)
= The Jungle Book 85% (StC 22)
Streets of Rage 2 80% (StC 4)
= Sonic Spinball 80% (StC 34)
CJ Elephant Fugitive 79% (StC 23)
Dino Basher 76% (StC 22)
Master of Darkness 75% (StC 5)
Tom & Jerry 70% (StC 1)
= Jurassic Park 70% (StC 9)
= Ren Hoek and Stimpy: Quest for the Shaven Yak 70% (StC 11)

Sonic & Knuckles 91% (StC 43)
Sonic CD 90% (StC 15)
Knuckles' Chaotix 88% (StC 54)
Sonic the Hedgehog: Triple Trouble 87% (StC 43)
Sonic Chaos 85% (StC 12)
Sonic Spinball [MD] 80% (StC 13)
= Dr. Robotnik's Mean Bean Machine 80% [MD] (StC 17)
= Sonic Spinball [GG] 80% (StC 34)
Sonic Drift 2 67% [GG] (StC 49)

Winter Olympics 68% [MD] (StC 22)
= Cheese Cat-Astrophe Starring Speedy Gonzales 68% [MD] (StC 50)
Sonic Drift 2 67% [GG] (StC 49)
GP Rider [MS] 65% (StC 5)
= Galaga [GG] 65% (StC 5)
= Road Runner [MS] 65% (StC 11)
= Joe Montana's NFL Football [SCD] 65% (StC 17)
= Champions World Class Soccer Endorsed By Ryan Giggs [MD] 65% (StC 33)
Normy's Beach Babe-O-Rama [MD] 62% (StC 27)
Wiz 'n' Liz: The Frantic Wabbit Wescue [MD] 61% (StC 20)
Time Gal [SCD] 60% (StC 4)
= Hurricanes [MD] 60% (StC 45)
Mighty Morphin Power Rangers [MD] 59% (StC 42)
Daffy Duck in Hollywood [MS/GG] 55% (StC 34)
PGA Tour Golf [MS/GG] 54% (StC 15)

What a sad and pathetic thread.

>>12369275
If it depresses you so much, why don't you kill yourself?

>>12369146
Truly a shame, but such is life.