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High IQ Mass Effect roleplayers immerse it up by coming up with creative in-universe reasons why nobody says his/her name. Such as naming your character:

>Commander Adolf Shepard
>Commander Nigger Shepard
>Commander God Shepard
>Commander Osama Bin Ladin Shepard
>Commander Devil Shepard
>Commander Satan Shepard
>Commander Hitler Shepard
>Commander Monkey Shepard
>Commander Big-Head Shepard
>Commander Queenie Shepard
>Commander Queefy Shepard
>Commander Stinky Shepard
>Commander Pussy Shepard
>Commander Smelly Shepard
>Commander Lucifer Shepard
>Commander 1488 Shepard
>Commander Vagina Shepard
>Commander Evil Shepard
>Commander Bubbles Shepard
>Commander Succubus Shepard
>Commander Incubus Shepard
>Commander Injustice Shepard
>Commander KANG Shepard
>Commander Jihad Shepard
>Commander Strawberry Shepard
>Commander Scooter Shepard
>Commander Tutsy Shepard
>Commander Poopsie Shepard
>Commander Gaylord Shepard
>Commander Herpes Shepard
>Commander Finkleberg Shepard
>Commander Karen Shepard
>Commander Dickie Shepard
>Commander Chlamydia Shepard
>Commander Uranus Shepard
>Commander Cunt Shepard
>Commander Bitch Shepard
>Commander Molester Shepard
>Commander Milhouse Shepard
>Commander Ching-Chong-Ding-Dong Shepard
>Commander Pixie Shepard
>Commander Eenis Shepard
>Commander Peeny Shepard
>Commander Sister Shepard
>Commander Fanny Shepard
>Commander Jeffrey Epstein Shepard
>Commander Boner Shepard
>Commander Sugartits Shepard
>Commander Cumwinner Shepard
>Commander Boobies Shepard
>Commander Butthead Shepard
>Commander Peewee Shepard
>Commander Gay Shepard

Yeah it's cool to name your guy Sebulba Shepard, Raj Shepard, Shrek Shepard, Lucky Shepard, Galaxy Shepard or whatever based sounding shit like that, but explain why no character in all 3 games mentions your 1st name? You can't. The trilogy makes more sense if nobody says your name with the good reason like they're afraid to do so in-universe... be it they're afraid to look racist, or afraid of offending the boss, etc.
Please take my meds so I can make stupid shit posts like this instead.
his name is john buddy
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Except it would fit the Lore far better if you were to shortly extend that name him into "Johnny Nigger". Which is why denizens of the Galaxy are very reluctant to address him by his first name, and not even really wanting to abbreviate it into a nickname "John" either. Imagine if you were serving on a military starship and pic related was an earthborn ex-gang member raised on the streets, he is your boss and named "Johnny Nigger". You'd probably be too nervous to call him even "John" at that point, and would never relax I.E. be very careful to only address him as "Shepard" or "Commander" always.
A fat janny made this thread.
>please take my meds

>canon name? john

>OP is fat

>OP is a janny
>Flight Lieutenant Jeff "Joker" Moreau. Helmsman of the Normandy SR-2. Masturbation enthusiast with porn addiction. Best pilot humanity has to offer, perhaps the best pilot in the Galaxy. Class clown of the ship he serves on. Modeled after Seth Green. Voiced by Seth Green. "Written" by Seth Green.

>Flight Lieutenant Gordon Malloy. Helmsman of The Orville. Masturbation enthusiast with porn addiction. Best pilot humanity has to offer, perhaps the best pilot in the Galaxy even. Class clown of the ship he serves on. Played by "professional Seth Green Impersonator", Scott Grimes.
It seems pretty clear Orville's Gordon Malloy is a direct rip off of Mass Effect's Joker. He's even more "plagiarized" off of Joker than Peter Griffin is "plagiarized" off of Homer Simpson I'd gambit. And that's a good thing. I always liked Joker so he fits nicely into a Star Trek spinoff. Based off Gordon's character I'd imagine Mass Effect is one of the few RPGs Seth Macfarlane loves. He works closely with Seth Green voicing family guy, so Green probably convinced MacFarlane to play the ME trilogy given how much Seth MacFarlane fucking loves Outer Space. And Seth MacFarlane loved the trilogy so much, he ended up writing the helmsman in his Star Trek spinoff to be a clone of Mass Effect's Joker! Probably lots of Joker easter egg references within the show, such as the subtle "I can do it..." reference in the first episode.

Speaking of Seth Green. How much did he get paid for the Mass Effect trilogy? And how much did Mark Meer (Male Shepard) get paid? Idk much about voice acting salaries, but I'm thinking Seth Green got paid over 10 times as much as Mark Meer? thats gay if true. Both did a great job bringing the character to life and should be paid substantially for contributing to the trilogy but Mark needs the raise most of all. Jennifer Hale is great too sure, but contrary to popular belief, when viewed next to supreme ME VA Mark Meer she's actually only okay in comparison...
I named my Shepard Dennis
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Earthborn backstory with Renegade Shepard is funny if you pick a milquetoast name like Wilson or Dennis, the only real problem is nobody says your name.

I've heard some players say the only proper way to play these games is to make your character as horrifically deformed as possible like pic related Staci Shepard bc battle scars made her hit the wall in her mid 20s here. Given how much battle Shepard has seen it makes sense he or she is not exactly attractive anymore after already getting shot in the head with hyper-velocity rounds dozens of times by age 28.
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>"Ffs! Conrad! I haven't been shot in the head nearly enough times to make that sound like a good idea! You're clearly not ready for the SPECTREs, damnit! Go home and be a family man!"
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What are the consequences of denying Jack the Cerberus files upon her recruitment? It has been awhile since I tried that, but doesn't it delay Jack's loyalty mission a few "turns"?

If so, it might be the only way to keep everybody alive (without the cheesey "exploit" of delaying TIM's Derelict Ship mission) during the Suicide Mission. You'd have to recruit Jack immediately before Horizon, tell her to fuck off back to Space Africa when she asks you for the Cerberus file access, which might(?) delay her loyalty mission request until after the 5th mission after Horizon. The problem is for a "perfect run" here you need to slip in a 6th mission before the Collector ship to recruit Thane on Illium, which you can normally do if you save Miranda's loyalty mission for 5th, except the problem is since Jack is loyal she will teleport you off of Illium to trigger the pic related fight with Miranda after doing her mission 5th, forcing the Collector Ship mission and making you unable to recruit Thane on Illium for a 6th pre-Collector Ship mission you squeeze in.

Idk, I could be misremebering, but I'm drunkenly calculating Suicide Mission survival mechanics in my head here, and I'm about 90% certain you would actually be able to "save everybody" if only Loyal Jack did not fucking teleport you back on your ship upon finishing Miranda's Illium mission 5th. And by "save everybody" I mean what I mention in most of my Mass Effect threads, you are not exactly doing a legitimate ME2 run if you plan to delay the TIM's Derelict Raperr mission, you'd be doing a Mary Sue cheese run. I.E. Don't ever delay that mission or ME3 will feel even more lacking in player choice/consequence. Forcing yourself to sacrifice squaddies in the Suicide Mission just adds something soulful to Shepard's journey, with the RP ruthless calculus element of Shepard pondering in-universe the harsh consequences of whose loyalty is most valuable overall towards contributing to the success the Omega 4 Relay mission...
there's an indian guy at work named Nijjer that i'm afraid to speak to for this very reason
This is probably the most foreign sounding name I've heard in my life. If I tried to breed any race and name my offspring that I'd be jailed for on about 20 different hate crime laws.

Indian male Shepards make for pretty funny playthroughs though since the thought of a hindu dude speaking in Mark Meer's voice is just plain ridiculous.
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Wait which one is actually even was """client race""" here again?
ME1's intro was surprisingly stupid on replay
>Everyone assumes Saren is evil because a crooked dockworker said so
>Can only act pissed at the council even though your case against Saren is a flimsy witness account
>Citadel embassies, which in lore are super special prestige symbols for the various races, are just tiny offices with 1 desk
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Mass Effect 2 is like that too sometimes...
>Greetings Shepard Commander.
>We are Legion.
>Our combat class is literally named "Geth Infiltrator".
>We have a verbatim ingame dialogue line bluntly stating "Geth do not infiltrate.".
Yes AI is the future. Yes don't worry that's a good thing. Also the crooked dock worker knew Saren by name which is why his testimony seemed intriguing enough to the Normandy Crew. He was a low IQ out-of-the-loop normie, but typically only high IQ well-informed elite individuals even know the name Saren. As for the Embassies sucking in Mass Effect 1, idk, I mean the Presidum is still based since it has 0.2 standard gravity, fancy air and very expensive water and such but I guess they were a somewhat small. I'd blame the Keepers for the embassies being too small. Either way the Citadel feels way more alive in ME1 compared to ME2 and ME3. And it is fucking immersion-shattering as hell that Shepard chooses to walk around the Citadel with no guns or armor in ME3, when millions of indoctrinated sleeper-agents are capable of attempting to assassinate Shepard there.
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Good news I acquired secret leaks for Mass Effect 4, it sounds surprisingly consistent with the Lore. Here is everything I know so far:

>Mass Effect 1 Council was killed
>Black Kaiden dies in Mass Effect 2 during the Suicide Mission. And it is canon that Shepard always fucking hated Jacob, Bioware trying to win back fans' wallets here desu
>Genophage was wisely left uncured
>Quarians and Geth are once again at war
>Rachni and Krogan are once again at war
>Kid on earth was never even real!
>Collector Base was wisely saved
>The Citadel Council is run exclusively by the Volus
>This is a VERY bad thing for every race except for the Volus themselves
>Samara sadly dies retaking Earth
>Miranda sadly dies retaking Earth
>Liara sadly dies retaking Earth
>Urdnot Grunt sadly dies retaking Earth
>Kasumi sadly dies retaking Earth
>Joker and the Normandy crew sadly all die retaking Earth
>Kaiden sadly dies retaking Earth
>Cyber-Shepard sadly dies retaking Earth (Buzz Aldrin's "One more story..." line is not retconned. Shepard's Citadel DLC Clone is Mass Effect 4's protagonist)
>N7 wannabe James Vega and his boyfriend Steve Cortez both sadly(?) die retaking Earth
>Tali tragically dies retaking Earth! The horror!!
>Jack sadly dies retaking Earth
>Javik survives the mission to take back Earth. Sadly he goes full edgelord and kills himself 2 weeks later, so Javik will not appear in Mass Effect 4
>Garrus sadly dies retaking Earth
>Admiral Anderson dies retaking Earth
>Admiral Hackett sadly dies retaking Earth
>TIM survives and rebuilds Kai Leng in Project Lazarus 2.0
>Cyber-Kai Leng is now 5 times more Mary Sue than he was in Mass Effect 3
>Luckily Zaeed Massani survives the mission to take back Earth against all odds somehow
>Zaeed plays a MASSIVE role in the next trilogy, Mass Effects 4, 5 and 6
>Zaeed remains DLC character costing over $29.99 per game

So we can still have best squaddie again next trilogy, great. We just have to pay an extra $100 to unlock him. Is that reasonable?
My Shepard is Barbarella Shepard, very attractive bimbo woman that is dumb as a brick and asks really stupid questions with obvious answers. She joined military to have easy access to the delicious soldiers. She accidentally became biotic adept because she thought getting military funded implants meant something different. Council scouted her for the spectre programme because she was very vocal about her love for other species, which hadn't got her many fans amongst the humanity supremacists. She fancied the asari councillor, and was very disappointed when she learnt from Liara that extranet lied to her and that asari don't have a penis. Her usual tactics is to hide behind big Krogan or Turian boys and throw the ugly sexless geth or batarians around while yelling "Gross, get that away from me." She suspects the Illusive man keeps a clone of her as a sexdoll. She wanted to fuck Joker, but was afraid she would break his bone. She seriously thinks there really is a bone in the boner. She would never admit it, but she might know more about the scale-itch that spreaded on Normandy. She wanted to throw Miranda out of airlock, because there is place only for one alpha bitch on the crew.
>very attractive bimbo woman that is dumb as a brick and asks really stupid questions
Here's the pic related Character Creation Code for the perfect Shepard for the specific build you use. Also don't worry about why I have pic related saved in my Mass Effect fap folder.

If you ever play as a female Shepard, you should place RP restrictions on yourself as the player for the sake of realism. Ideally no Paragon interrupts, no Renegade interrupts, no "Blue dialogue choices" and no "Red dialogue choices" while rolling femshep. Femshep is hardcore as shit but she doesn't have the balls to pull off those astronomical speechcraft maneuvers that Mark Meer lands!
Interesting. How did she treat Morden and how did she react to Wrex getting married?
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Wtf? I can not even fucking begin to imagine a Krogan getting married. According to Detective Vakarian The Krogan have not even invented houses yet so I doubt they'd understand the concept of a marriage. You give the lesser races too much credit.

Do you mean when Urdnot Wrex "declared" over 900 Million Krogan females (including more than a few minors) to be his "wives" without their consent? I'd hardly call that an honest marriage. Nice quad btw
when is someone going to make a mod reinstating the ME1 animations, hair, outfits, and over the shoulder running animations to LE1?
This but more importantly when are you guys planning to release more free mods that equip femshep an even cuter butt than Operative Lawson? This will finally prevent all (or almost all) female Mass Effect fans from intentionally killing her during The Suicide Mission every playthrough.
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What were they thinking!?
Why didn't John Shepard order Miranda to dress like pic related? Did he suddenly forget he was in command of the entire operation? Sorry but I'm calling serious plothole bullshit here.
Lucky for you Nijjer is not a Spectre
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no because actually the real question is would he rather be a Krogan Battlemaster for a day, or an Asari Commando for a day? a lot of anons could learn a lot of deep insights about their true inner selves by pondering that very question
Commander KROGAN COCK SO GOOD Shepard
For some people nickname sticks so well nobody call them by their real name
The ingame codex entries are well written. But these games need codex entries on all varieties of alien genitalia be it legendary Krogan super weiners, smelly Krogan pussy-vaginas, Batarian little tiny penis and etc.

It seems unnerving that Asari sleep with Elcor and Krogan. I'd imagine those kinds of space niggers have HUGE space weiners. And honestly If I to guess here I'd wager that even the average Elcor man would have a superior space weiners than even the mightiest of all Krogans ever have! How do they not accidentally murder the Asari by fucking them to death? Is it mostly Asari mind sex with very limited penetration action in this case? There's a Krogan on the Citadel that dreams of fucking the Asari Consort but his Krogan buddy comments Asari look squishy and gross to him. Wrex even "jokes" about having fucked members of alien species to death in the past during the Citadel DLC. Was he serious? Idk if Wrex was "joking" or not here. Is that a thing in the Lore? Women get fucked to death daily by Krogan Warlords and Elcors? Based if true. Dangerously based.

No homo but I need a codex entry on Big Krogan Cock, Big Elcor Cock, Big Turian Cock. Tiny Quarian Pussy codex entries too. And a codex entry or two for Asari Birth Canals. I just want to familiarize myself with the Lore here. Wouldn't Liara's space pussy be outrageously loose since it never evolved to take cock, instead it only evolved to poop out blueberry babies? Perhaps Shepard and Liara have to engage in a lot of anal butt stuff together because her space vagina is waaay too big to please or be pleased by our human cocks, but the Asari dating that Krogan transport technician bro on Illium completely avoid anal because fitting his BKC in her butthole would be like trying to insert a Monster Energy can in a cheerio, whereas her oversized Asari vagina synergizes somewhat well with his oversized Krogan Cock? idk
Based thread. God I miss the pure retardation of old /vrpg/
pic related Jack's eyes look full of fear while Shepard and Miranda's eyes look full of dark lust as if they are planning to double team rape Jack together
It is mindblowingly gay how there is no Codex entry on Asari Mind Sex. Somebody needs to make an AI voice splice mod of the based Codex narrator guy doing an entry for Asari Mind Sex but it would have to be as Lore friendly as possible. As well as a codex on Quarian sweat I suppose seeing as we technically have a lot of Lore on that thanks to some deranged autistic ME fan. Modders also need to make AI voiced variants of the secondary ingame Codex entries featuring the original VA Neil Ross's epic voice (fun fact he also voiced Colonel Volgin in Metal Gear Solid 3). We can all probably agree it was incredibly poor sportsmanship on Bioware's part to not voice those secondary Codex entries in the Legendary remake with him. Did modders fix this yet?

Honestly Shepard should have been able to ask Liara about this in far greater detail ingame as well as Codex entries being needed for it. For example if you talk to Liara T'soni on the Normandy SR-1 and bring up the investigate tab, one of the listed options should obviously be "Alien Mind Sex" here. Like I can't even find a photoshopped meme image of Shepard talking to Liara T'soni with the three tabs "Benezia" and "Asari Culture" and "Alien Mind Sex" shown for ffs. Can anyone make that image for me? Thanks.

I suppose if any anons are kind enough to make an AI Voice mod where Neil Ross's voice narrates an entry on Asari Mind Sex, I could volunteer to write the script for it. I have some reasonable Lore theories on what Asari Mind Sex feels like from an in-universe meta perspective. I'd be the right guy for the job to write immersive Lore friendly lines for such a mod, but idk much about mod making. I can easily write a Lore friendly standard 3 paragraph ME Codex on Asari Mind Sex, idk if I could write a non-standard 30 paragraph entry on Asari Mind Sex. Im pretty sure the mod would be even funnier if the entry is inexplicably 10 times longer than normal as Neil explains how awesome Asari sex feels with scientific accuracy
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>She seriously thinks there really is a bone in the boner.
Barbarella Shepard is correct, because in the case of the Krogan I believe there likely is literally a massive space dinosaur-esq bone inside of their Krogan boners.
ME2's ending was surprisingly stupid too. You would think Dr.Chocolates owes Commander Shepard sex after rescuing her from that horrific collector pod but she does not put out even after that mission. At least Yeoman Kelly Chambers is polite enough to reward Shepard with plenty of sexual favors afterwards should you choose to save her life during the Collector Base assault. Most Mass Effect 2 players only rescue Dr.Chocolates on their first playthrough because they intelligently assume it will trigger a romance with her down the line ingame, yet somehow the subject of sex never comes up with her afterwards! Wtf? This is probably just another stupid design oversight on Bioware's part. There is literally no way Karen Chakwas would not want Cyber-Shepard's huge dick in her asshole, especially after the Suicide Mission. Why didn't the Commander bang her? Thats a plothole.

And let's not forget ME3 has some parts that are just as stupid on replay. Why the hell didn't anybody on Shepard's ship or in the Alliance Brass suggest it is urgent that we must clone Javik? He is literally the last Prothean in the known Galaxy, in the event he should die on one of Shepard's many high-risk missions it is the final "Game Over" forever for the Prothean race. Did Dr.T'soni and Dr.Solus suddenly forget cloning is pretty commonplace in their late 22nd Century Space Age society? Wtf? And you don't even have to clone him ingame, you just have to suggest cloning him, they can still have Javik go full retard and chimp out screaming Protheans do not approve of cloning because of some gay Prothean cultural custom or something maybe. That would kind of avoid the plothole while still making feel Javik "Special" as the last member of his race.

Sad. I'm not saying these games are pure shit, I shitpost on this trilogy out of love, but we can all agree there are some pretty Massive plot holes in all 3 Mass Effects sadly. Just way too many such cases, like really Massive cases sometimes.
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From a Lore standpoint? no. John Shepard was incorrectly selected by Bioware as the default name if you skip the character creator, they obviously chose this name because it is the most "average" sounding name when the game was produced in the 21st Century. Of course Bioware obviously chose wrong. Bioware should have made it Slim Shepard by default, or anything else that sounds "average" for the future. In the 22nd Century "Slim" will be the new "John" essentially. John would be some rare af name in 2183 that almost nobody in-universe has ever heard of outside of some ancient storybooks and old movies/ old rpg movie games, meanwhile Slim will become the 3rd most common name in Burger Land with over 6.3 Million Slims living in just the North American Union alone.

As for the equivilant name to John for 23rd century? idk?

Did you know you start Mass Effect 1 ranked as Lieutenant Commander Shepard? You get promoted off screen so starting out Mass Effect 2 you are Staff Commander Shepard, and unlike Gayden Alenko you never even reach the rank of Major or Captain etc. Did you even read the ingame journal and codex entries or were you too busy ODing on your pharmaceutical meds again?
>"Hey. Something I can do for you, Commander?"
>"How's the Normandy SR-1 performing? Is she everything they said she would be?"
>"Look Commander, since everybody else on the ship keeps ignoring the elephant in the room I'll just come out and ask. I've read your file. It says you were born April 11th 2154 on the Mindoir Colony, right? So what's with the weird ass name, Commander? John? JOHN Shepard? What the shit is that!? Dude! What are you, some top secret time traveler actually born in 1908 backwater rural Texas, Shepard? WOW how'd you end up way out here in space, cowboy? And if you were really the best SPECTRE in the Galaxy why couldn't you stop 9/11 and the Holocaust back in your early life or something? More important side-missions to tackle instead back then, Johnny? Also. ."
>"That's enough Joker! I will not tolerate my crew spitting corny wisecracks about my Christian name! Just do your job and fly my ship, I don't have time for your crap! Is that clear?"
>"Y..yes sir. I'm sorry, Commander."
>"I should go."
>"K, see you."
are there any mods in which I can actually boss fight Wrex on Virmire or the Citadel docks instead of killing him in a cutscene?
>"HAH! Dont make me laugh, Wrex. It's pathetic when Krogan try talking big! Stand down!! I've encountered Elcor bonerquads on missions before!"
>"Oh yeah? So what?"
>"They are EVEN STRONGER than your pathetic little Krogan baby bonerquads Wrex I dont want you on the mission damnit! k? Go to the Normandy! Guard muh cargo hold now! You need timeout at the kids table you dumb cheese-brain lizard monstrosity alien freak! Go back! I HATE YOU WREX! Dismissed! Bye!"
>"GRrRrr! NO! This is varrenshit ShepUrd! How the fuck can you not see what this means for the Krogan? You expect me to lay down watching muh commander destroy the genophage cure that I've been seeking for 1,473 years? These are My People youre planning to genocide on your blasted mission! You CANT destroy it!"
>"Calm down! I can understand why youre a bit whiny, I'd even be a little mopey if I were a Krogan here, Wrex. But we both know damn well that scientifically-speaking Krogan are NOT organics, or even people! You know, The Krogan are just God's mistake, like that 285 IQ STG agent over there just said! Were you even listening? Youre not as smart as you look Wrex!"
>"WE ARE NOT A MISTAKE! Don't push me ShepUurd!! I followed you because I wanted to fight for something more than credits! Why should I stay loyal?"
>"All you need to know is I'm giving you a fucking order to stay in line, Krogan! FUCK! Wrex, these Krogan are NOT Your People! They are tank bred freaks! Did you forget STG Agents mentioning this to you, you fat fucking low IQ lizard nigger? So you'd be ok with your clan leader accepting Tank Breds into Urdnot?"
>"Well no, I wouldn't. Not unless he wuz with you, and if he wuz big? Still. Ok ShepUrd! You made your point!"
>"Good boy Wrex! Im surprised a Krogan was able to listen to reason this is historical now go guard my ship bro and stop using my computers! It pisses Ashley off how aliens are allowed to use human computers!"
>"NO! WREX CALM DOWN! We'll bang okay?"
Joker's real name is Jeff, so I don't really think he has a leg to stand on.
Human forever
All aliens are scum
I am not a raceist because biologically we are all siblings
Everyone on earth evolved from the same organisms and if you go back enough we share a common ancestor
We are all cousins, even with niggers, even with jews, even with dogs, cats and fish
We are all one big family
But aliens evolved from different cells and are not family
Fuck em
>for a day
Did you forget to read that part? If its just one day, whats the big deal? It's not like you're sacrificing your humanity permanently, you'll transform back to a human again 24 hours later in this scenario, richer from the experiance.

If you could be a Krogan Battlemaster for one day, this means you could crush all of your irl enemies and nobody would suspect you the next day, they'd all assume some huge alien lizard was responsible for the murder spree.
>"If you are here to talk about Benezia's death, you need not bother. She brought it upon herself."
>"Forget about her. I don't care about that anyway. Maybe we can pick up where we left off? You were telling me about your interest in the Protheans. What can you tell me about the Protheans? Were they based?"
>"What? Based? Based on what, Shepard?"
>"Good Lord, are all aliens this clumsy, autistic and awkward? Or is it just you Asari?"
>"I am simply unfamiliar with the human expression you used! You'd be surprised how often different cultures in the Galaxy are not familiar with each other's specific lingo. What exactly are you trying ask me about the Protheans, Shepard?"
>"What about Prothean technology? I've heard it is dangerously based, from several good sources. Look I've found these 10 Prothean Data disks while scanning various systems recently, but I don't know what the hell they do. Are these disks based or not, Liara?"
>"BY THE GODDESS where did you find these!? I've been desperately trying to get my hands on just one of these Prothean Data Disks for over 50 of your years, Shepard! You're telling me you accidentally stumbled across 10 of them in just 2 short months so far!? That is beyond remarkable!"
>"If that's the case, it sounds like this tech might be pretty based after all. What does it do? Can we use them as a weapon to fight the Rapers!?"
>"Well, no, probably not, nothing like that. And they might take decades, or more, to decode. These can potentially provide us with very valuable clues OR insights into Prothean cultures someday!! Think of all we might learn!"
>"Ugh, great. Sounds cringe. I have to go! Meet me in my quarters at 21:00 hours Liara. We'll bang, okay?"
>"Bang? Cringe? What? I am sorry, I apologize for having difficulty following human languages sometimes. This is quite unprofessional for a seasoned archaeology expert such as myself, in fact I'm more than a bit embarrassed about the ordeal, commander..."
>"Don't worry about it."
>"Jesus fucking Christ!! That was one hell of firefight! Shepard my visor is indicating you just lost a ton of blood! I'd probably be in a 601 day long coma if I were you right now! How the hell are you still alive, Commander?"
>"Ashley's not kidding Commander! You sustained outright Massive injuries during this mission! Holy crap, are you sure you don't need any medigel, l Shepard?"
>"Aye aye, commander!"
>"Let's move out!"
Why did Saren Arterius kill Keeper 488? Was he racist? What about Commander Shepard? Was he racist too? hmmm....
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does anybody still have mass effect installed? /meg/ is dead and I'll need good pics of this helmet from all angles (for research purposes)
Remember. Definitely don't forget you should always wear your helmet while in combat, Commander Stinky. It also might not be a bad idea to have to have Professor Solus and EDI research more effective helmet shielding tech in the Normandy SR-2 science lab on the CIC Deck maybe? Getting shot in the face with hyper-velocity polonium rounds is not fun.
>"Humans have been trying to get the attention of the Galactic Community for years! Youre the first human SPECTRE! Care to share thoughts?"
>"We all know it should've happened long ago! The Council finally realized Humanity wont sit at the kids table forever!"
>"But some believe that without firm action on our part the Council will continue to oppress us forever! Have you encountered any situations where the Council demanded you place its needs before Earth?"
>"Obviously """The Council""" is wise enough not to ask me to work against my own people!"
>"Our viewers will be happy to hear it! Youve been given command of an advanced human warship for your missions. Anything you'd like to say about it?"
>"Heh. The Normandy is a triumph of Chinese ingenuity and engineering! Like our development of advanced fighter-carriers, it shows other races humans are more-than-capable of thinking outside-the-box!"
>"Thats gratifying! Many defeatists Officers claim the Alliance cant compete with the naval power, of say, the Turians? Do you think it was appropriate to hand over Earth's most powerful warship over to Asari?"
>"Miss Al-Jilani I still wear the Alliance Uniform! If you think anybody except me says where the Normandy can go youre sadly mistaken!"
>"No offense intended Commander! Im sure you have to obey orders from your superiors! Of course now your superiors are ALIENS! In your opinion who should be held responsible for the destruction of the Colony on Feros?"
>"Wtf? You dare asking about my classified missions? Are you challenging me!? IVE HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR RACIST FAKE FUCKING GAY SHIT, WOMAN! Prepare to die!"
>"Sir she might be dead!"
>"Do I look like I give a space hamster's ass, Vakarian? Lets back to our mission, stay focused, Turian!"
>"Yes sir!"
wear space helmets especially in TV interviews so people in-universe meme on Space 4chan about Shepard being a mysterious masked Renegade badass akin to Boba Fett and/or Dark Vader of course
fuck off GPT, I need pics
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>fuck off robot
Wtf? First of all I'm not a synthetic. Second of all I'm just trying to educate you on Space Helmets anon, for your research purposes. Why the snobby attitude?
if you weren't a synthetic you would understand what I need and wouldn't respond to my post with a vague wall of text
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retarded Lorelet people think the Commander is this low IQ autistic stereotypical jarhead but that isn't true, he's actually quite gifted at hacking computer terminals for one example he just doesn't brag about it and he's also probably very skilled at Karate but is humble enough to never boast about such things.


Or maybe you're the synthetic, or worse, an alien? What are you, some sort of Geth Infiltrator? Why are you so interested in our N7 helmet technologies "sir"?
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>I need some sexy pictures of Kaiden posing in Phoenix Armor helmets from all possible angles
>It's actually for my own private research purposes obviously
What exactly are you researching? A cure for your erectile dysfunction? Did you try not being a homo? That might work too... Maybe.
just attempting to recreate this helmet for some different game, stop larping
Average mass effect tard
First of all Joker is retarded, but also a very good Starship pilot too. And my favorite piece of ME1 headcanon from day one was Joker's real name is Sebulba Moreau but he legally changed it to Jeff Moreau at a very young age when he decided he wanted to be the best pilot in the Galaxy when he grows up. Joker is based though. He's like the equivilant an above average comedic party bro autistically obsessed with old earth history irl today and can tell you over 900 unbiased facts about each of Burger Republic's 45 presidents in a way. Ingame Joker references The Matrix 1999 and 2001 A Space Toddaccy etc, as well as jokingly using archaic old english phrases like "driving school buses" and "taking checks" etc. I'm not entirely unlike Jeff in this regard since sometimes in events of extreme drunkenness I unintentionally speak in a Perfect Historical immitation of a 1930s Chicago Gangster I am told which confuses my peers I guess

Wait you specificially want pics of Gayden wearing Gaydix armor helmets? Ok. I'm placing a formal reprimand on your permanent record. Dirmissed.
a lot of the hair and outfits have been modded to be available for the other games, I think the walk cycles have been modded now too
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If the Council weren't written to be such incompetent short-sighted morons, I'd say its ridiculous that they scold Shepard for not sparing the Thorian. Don't they realize The Illusive Man TIM could use The Thorian to easily birth thousands of Kai Leng clones per day? Not even Shepard and squad can hope to compete with just one Kai Leng so imagine if Cerberus had 6 million very loyal Kai Lengs running around to do their bidding? The entire Galaxy, even the Krogan, would be utterly BTFO by Cerberus. Unless there is some Lore reason why the Thorian can only control one clone at a time, I never understood the reason why it didn't send like 10 Shiala Clones to overwhelm you together, instead making you fight the clones individually. So idk if thats gameplay mechanics BS if its just how Thorian Lore works
Star Child lies about Destroy ending killing all synthetics and you can't change my mind.
>Bro u will die cuz you half-synthetic!
>u will kill Jokers atom-punk gf!
>u will kill the heckin' wholesome redeemed Geth!
>u will probably even kill that helpful Citadel VI that gives all the useful info on how to navigate a playing area smaller than KOTOR's Taris!
And then you live through Destroy because the mother fucker lied to you. Notice how the little shit instantly schizes out in the Refusal ending? Its not benign in the slightest and I honestly don't even know why it allows you to make a choice outside of maybe hedging its bet that you'll be retarded enough to pick Green/Blue which will be a bigger win than just continuing the cycle again. Anyway, notice that not only does Shepard live, so that's one lie, but the ending slides never show neither the Geth nor EDI dead, only they are absent from the ending slides (who cares, just assume that BioWare were too lazy to add them in) and that Joker leaves Normandy alone (probably cuz the Relay exploded which fucked up the ship and now EDI has to stay inside and fix it while Joker goes on a stroll the lazy fuck). And hey, since BioWare is basically Godzilla's rotting carcass that is slowly sinking into the sea, I can bet that ME4 will never happen so I don't have to give a shit about what BioWare thinks is cannon.

So TLDR Shepard lives, Geth live, EDI lives and all the Reapers die, the end.
Everyone seems to forget that "Master" is a title and "chief" is his last name. John Chief is Halo, Master of killing.
ITT we post femsheps that would constitute as a 10/10 cutie in Omega during the 2180s but would be considered to look a bit on the average side by when viewed through the lens of of irl modern beauty standards

This is true but it is insignificant because Commander Shepard and squad would obliterate Master Chief in a fight. A name means nothing on the battlefield, like Snake said.

I agree. It's incredibly clear every word the Star Brat speaks to Shepard is a straight up lie, and Bioware PR people even tweeted extensively explaining to their idiotic fanbase that it's canon how Star Child is being deliberately dishonest with Commander Shepard.

It also would be a very fucking gay move on Bioware's part if Shepard isn't a character in Mass Effect 4 especially since the final line of the trilogy is literally irl Astronaut Buzz Aldrin speaking to a kid:

>"Tell me another story about The Shepard!"
>"Well, it's getting late, but okay! One more story..."

If Bioware goes back on that and retcons it by saying Shepard died, it'd rank in the Top 3 Betrayals of fans in RPG History when Mass Effect 4 releases desu
>"Have you got a minute to talk?"
>"Actually! Wanted to talk! Medical matters!"
>"Aware that mission is dangerous! Different species... react differently to stress!"
>"Uh... What the hell are you talking getting at, Mordin?"
>"Past relationship with Tali'Zorah makes dalliance attractive as stress release! Still recommend caution! Quarian immune system weak! Could kill her!"
>"For the love of God, professor. Just because I'm a human doesn't mean I'm retarded! The last thing I need is some scientific how-to guide about how to pleasure Tali'Zorah sexually written by some kooky autistic 50 year old virgin lizard man! Uh, no offense."
>"None taken! Pfft! Human squeamishness! Typical! What do wish to discuss Shepard?"
>"I was curious if you could research a Batarian sterility plague, similar to the genophage you unleashed on the Krogan race. How feasible, expensive and time-consuming such a research product be this be?"
>Introspective sigh.jpg
>"First of all Shepard! Already explained genophage is NOT sterility plague! Merely corrects birthrate for post-industrial Krogan society! To answer question? Project you suggest would be simple, short and cheap!"
>"Based! So can you develop one and have it ready for me by next week? Consider that I find those projected Batarian population growth simulations I had you run awfully unsettling, Mordin..."
>"NO! Shocking suggestion! CRINGE! Already aware I disagree with your cold-blooded ruthless Renegade methods, human! Will NOT develop anti-Batarian Bioweapon for you! Like giving nuclear weapons to cave men!! Sorry but not sorry Shepard! Questions about Tali's vagina sweat!? Please ask! Otherwise politely fuck off letting me conduct imperative scientific experiments vital to mission!"
>"I'll let you work..."
>"Will be here if you need me!"
actually we just want more mods that let us play as a Krogan attempting to disguise herself as a human like pic related
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I never understood why scientists describe Krogan as sapient. I'd describe them as a semi-sapient species at best. I also never understood why people say Krogan have long lifespans, they don't. I mean sure technically Krogan can live for several thousand years in theory, but over 99% of all modern Krogan die in battle before reaching age 5, so I'd hesitate to call the Krogan a long-lived species.
kek the ending
Anon he barley has legs to stand on at all
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>"Welcome to the Normandy, Jack. I'm Jacob, Shepard's 3rd in command. On this ship, we follow orders."
>"Tell the Cerberus nigger to back off, Shepard! I'm here because of OUR deal!"
>"Hah! Based! And about my files?"
>"What about your files? I was bluffing, idiot. Can't read a good poker face? What are you autistic, Jack?"
>"SHEPARD WHAT THE FUCK!? You promised me the secret Cerberus files! We had a deal man!"
>"Whatever Jack. I'm altering the deal. First we'll bang, okay? And if I find the experience suitably romantic, MAYBE I'll give you the secret Cerberus files 2 weeks later. Deal?"
>Enraged Grumble.jpg
>"Jack? Deal?"
>"UGH Fine! I'll consider it! You better be straight up with me, Shepard! I can only tolerate so much of your bluffing before I FUCKING SNAP! Okay?"
>"Good, that's all for now, dismissed."
>"Im going to go find somewhere quiet near the bottom! Keep your niggers off me, better that way."
>Enraged exit.jpg
>"Shepard she can't be trusted! She's clearly mentally unstable and is a danger to the mission! We have to throw her out the airlock ASAP Commander!!!"
>"Miranda, stfu! I'm in command of this operation, not you! Don't make me summon you to the Captain's Quarters to kick your fucking ass again, Lawson!"
>"I SAID STFU CHEERLEADER CUNT! Let me at least bang her first, if shes crap in bed, maybe I'll space her. It's my decision. Dismissed"
>"Fine! I have important work to do anyway! Btw Commander! You should stop taking me and the Salarian on every bloody mission! We're always super busy doing the ship's computers!"

TIM generously slightly fixed his legs up a bit after ME1
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Hm... What did Bioware mean by pic related? Who would casually smile light-heartedly whilst completely engulfed in Literal Fire? It almost feels like Bioware meant to say something here. Perhaps Bioware meant to imply Commander Shepard is getting pretty Indoctrinated by this point in the trilogy as the struggle to resist Indoctrination grows more difficult which can be tricky to portray via gameplay mechanics. Reminds me of how Kotor gameplay mechanics can not "accurately" portray the luring calls of the Darkside tempting the player I guess. I mean it certainly does not look like Bioware is saying Shepard is now suddenly growing less Indoctrinated going forward in the Trilogy past this pic related scene right? Like wouldn't the Rapers want him more Indoctinated instead of less Indoctrinated? Why would they suddenly feel like stopping Indoctrination attempts on him now? They wouldn't. And was the kid on earth even real? idk. Nobody else in the trilogy has any interaction with the kid, not even the Alliance "rescue crew" on his transport never take even the slightest notice of him at all. Weird. What if Bioware intended pic related to be Shepard's inner-subconscious mind trying to warn Shepard shit like:

>This mysterious star child is Harbinger's mental avatar projected into your mind attempting to Indoctrinate you. Do not trust this mysterious star child, Shepard. The child was never real. You're losing it, Commander! This room is an illusion and a trap devist by Satan. You continue slowly growing Indoctrinated. Resist it! Trust your instincts! If you continue to trust this strange lying Star Child, you WILL burn (metaphorically) and suffer for it, Shepard...

For me? The first time I ever saw the child in my first ME3 playthrough I quickly started assuming "Wtf? Is this kid even real..? What if the Vancouver kid was never real? Why the hell do ALL of his scenes all feel 'off' and so surreal? Was Bioware intending me to question his existence..? Wtf..?"
>/meg/ is dead
>all these paragraphs of sublimated incel sexual frustration garbage

You know you could just say "hnng Jack" or "I like it when she tells me to say her name but she also means it as a verb" instead and just post hot Jack pics but no, instead you have to try to cover it up with this schizo bullshit. Why are you like this?
Some extra tips for how roleplay Renegade Shepartd:
>Bang everybody
>Punch all reporters
>RP as pro Cerberus
>RP as pro Terra Firma
>Betray aliens whenever the game lets you
>take the chud interviews with reporters to frustrate the Alliance Brass
>Never take alien squaddies on any missions ever unless the game forces you to take them
>Do not allow Rear Admiral Mikhalivoichi to inspect the Normandy SR-1 instead tell him to eat a Vorcha fart and go home
>Do not allow Diana Allers on your Stealth Ship unless you intend to bang her hard af
>Never talk to aliens on the ship unless it is to intentionally offend and harass them
>Tell Jack to eat your ass when she asks for the secret data files, then bang her
>Do not do any alien squadmate loyalty missions or their side-quests
>Kill the Council
>Make zero apologies for killing the Council
>Keep the collector base, again making no apologies for working for Cerberus
>Genocide the Rachni
>Genocide the Krogan
>Genocide the Quarians
>Never relax around Krogan
>Never awaken Grunt
>Never awaken Legion
>At least try not to let any humans die on the Suicide Mission
>Never speak to Volus NPCs unless the game forces you to
that sort of stuff

wtf? is this the part where I accept your concession and warn you to catch a transport back to Citadel Space yet, Prangley? or does that come later?
>just post hot Jack pics but no,
>Why are you like this?
I'm not sure I understand either your rant or your question. You're saying I need to post more pics of Jack being extra cute? The problem is Jack isn't exactly all that sexy really, so you're asking a lot here... Instead I can post Femshep looking extra cute. Enjoy!
>hair and outfits have been modded to be available for the games
I'm not sure I follow. In other words they did it backwards? What we really want is all of the Fallout mustaches modded to be available in the Mass Effect character creator so we can roleplay as a real space cowboy Shepard instead of some pretend space cowboy larper Shepard. The mustache needs to speak for itself which isn't really a thing in vanilla Mass Effect or even Legendary Edition
Unpopular opinion: Maybe she actually was indoctrinated all along. What if Shepard is the final boss battle in Mass Effect 4? This would leave only 3 options if the player wants to save the Galaxy:

>Kill indoctrinated Commander Shepard?
>Convince indoctrinated Commander Shepard to kill herself with Paragon dialogue?
>Convince indoctrinated Commander Shepard to kill herself with Renegade dialogue?
Sounds familiar. And again, not sure if choice or "illusion" of choice...
Nice dubs soldier. Are there usually a lot of chicks in /meg/ or is it a sausage fest like /vrpg/? Not asking for a fren, asking for myself here mostly. If you find yourself in /meg/ can you please ask the Mass Effect girls why they always get Miranda Lawson and Tali Zorah killed "by accident" on the Suicide Mission? Wtf? They all do it! Is it because Tali and Miranda have a cuter butt than femshep? You should tell them it's okay and not to feel bad because femshep has a pretty cute butt too actually, and that what they're doing is actually natural and normal because I sometimes make a habit of getting Garrus Vakarian and Jacob Taylor killed "by accident" during the Suicide Mission because I RP my Shepard is jealous they have larger penises than me and I'll assume I'm far from the only male who plays ME2 this way. But yes femshep certainly has a cute butt why is this even a question?
Anybody else miss elevator side missons in RPGs?
>"Message coming in. Patching it though."
>"Howdy there Hackett! What can I do you for, Admiral?"
>"Thank you for dealing with the hostage situation in the Hades Gamma Cluster, Commander. Chairman Martin Burns was quite impressed you were able to resolve the situation peacefully. You have gone above and beyond the Call of Duty."
>"Well thank you, Admiral. Permission to speak freely, sir?"
>"Of course, Commander."
>"I have very serious regrets about that last mission sir, and personally I wouldn't consider it a victory myself. The smart thing to do would've been to shoot first and ask questions later! Gun down every organic on that ship then blow her out of the sky for good measure! You know me, Hackett. I ain't racist, I just don't trust em! Biotics are not to be trusted, simple as! And to be frank I think it's a steaming disgraceful load of Krogan shit that the Alliance even allows biotics to serve in our fine military, sir! Heck, I even read some rumors on the extranets that some of biotics can read other people's minds! It stinks of a potential security risk! I'm not racist sir, I just don't like em!"
>"Understood, Commander. I should go. Hackett out."
The cool thing about this mission is iirc you begin the quest by listening to a News Broadcast riding in a Citadel elevator talking about biotic terrorists in the Hades Gamma cluster, at which point you get a bit of "player freedom" to fly over there and investigate if you feel like it. I wish we could still pick up side quests in elevators in ME2 and ME3 (and in every RPG that has elevators too I guess) but no. Each Mass Effect game in the trilogy is a massive step forward while also managing to be a massive step backwards. The lack of elevator side quests being an optimal example of downgrading between games. Verifcation not required.
>Vasir, I let the Destiny Ascension die
How did I miss this like while going through the Liara DLC in 2? I assume this is where the line is from, since you kill Vasir near the end of it.
>be femshep
>save the Galaxy multiple times
>log on the extranet. key words: Space Onlyfans
>open an account
>show (doctored or otherwise) footage of the Council literally Kissing Your Ass and tonguing your farting anus as they offer their sincere apologies for trying to fuck with you in the past
>you are now earning over 10 Million Galactic Credits per month from the Noveria subscribers alone (this also goes a long way towards amending previously damaged diplomatic relations between the Citadel and the Noverians)
>you are now earning over 4 Billion Galactic Credits per month from just the Omega subscribers alone (This also goes a long way towards amending previously damaged diplomatic relations between the Citadel and Omega)
>you are now earning nearly 1 Trillion Galactic Credits per month from just the Illium subscribes alone (this also goes quite a long way towards amending previously damaged diplomatic relations between the Citadel and the Tasale System of course)
>6 months later you suddenly have more money than even Barla Von and Saren Arterius and TIM and Henry Lawson and The Shadowbroker and Sovereign and Aria combined can even dream of having
>Your net worth is expected by Volus finance experts to explosively grow exponentially in the near-future
>What do?
Why didn't femshep just bang (or have EDI and Mordin create an indistinguishable deep fake on Space Onlyfans) the Citadel Council to get rich and spend the credits on goods and services and etc while she was saving the Galaxy?

>"HNNG JACK ewww your vagina is so stinky! Too stinky! I literally give up Jack! I quit. I officially can't perform, sorry. I should go. COUGH COUGH sorry. hnng...."
>RP as pro Cerberus
Is this even possible in 3? I'm playing it for the first time, and when the Illusive Man said he wanted to control the reapers, the only responses I had were different flavors of "go fuck yourself."
>Can you be Pro Cerberus in me3?
not really, but you can do small things such as refusing to apologize to Kaiden and Ashley for working for Cerberus in ME2 which antagonizes them into hating you to the point they will even reject your recruitment offer. pic related

Working for Cerberus in ME3 was never an option because TIM is Indoctrinated since the start of the game
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>TIM is Indoctrinated since the start of the game
god damn it, TIM
>be TIM
>get Indoctrinated
>"god dam it, TIM! YOU WERE THE CHOSEN ONE!! Cerberus was supposed to be Humanity's Sword, not dagger in our back! You're Indoctrinated they're controlling you DAMNIT!"
>"No Shepard! Once again you are wrong! BECAUSE YOU JUST ARE, OKAY!?"
he was one if the Greatest of our race but he was still no match for the rapers unfortunately. he got too greedy, so blinded and obsessed with the limitless potential of the Collector Base (or her bombarded remains) tech that even in all his "self-proclaimed foresight" he did not foresee his obvious doomed af future of the Collector HQ Indoctrinating him and his top agents. Some RPs I wish there was a way to nuke the base and its tech but not nuke the surrounding ships, so we can examine dead alien culture shipwork and shit, except of course thats a non-option for the fact simple fact alone how even many of the dead ships most potentially have discreet Indoctrination Raper tech secretly installed hidden within them too. We obv should have brough WAAAY more space WMDs on that mission in hindsight of course too.
>doing first Mass Effect Trilogy playthrough
>feeling confused
you can definitely trust me with your Lore questions also I'm not ESL nor a Vol Clan Rabbi or anything, just a drunkard shitposter Lore expert so some nights typos galore. But i wouldn't trust too many of the other moronic lurkers here with ME Lore tips or ME Insanity gameplay tips and etc. You'd be surprised how retarded the average Mass Effect Trilogy "fan" is, here or anywhere else
>wtf how did I miss rare ME2 dialogue?
You select to kill the council in ME1, then while you're fighting the Asari SPECTRE on Illium in ME2 she takes a human single-mother as a hostage attempting to flee, at which point you select the "evil" dialogue choice, making Renegade Slim Shapard say something like:

>"BWAHAHA is this a joke? Did you not read my data profile? Vasir, I let the the Destiny Ascension die with "6,000,000" hostages on board! Including the Council! You think you're going to impede my mission with one random ass human hostage girl!? Pfft! Let me show you how real SPECTREs get the job done, you blue privileged Asarifu whore!"

semi related speaking of Tela Vasir. a spaced mod idea is anytime somebody ingame says "Asari pureblood" it is spliced to say "Asari inbred" instead. eh? idk could be based maybe
Name's Jack. Jack Shepard. Then a bald retarded dyke comes along and introduces herself as Jack, not even her real name btw. That's why nobody calls the commander by his first name. In the first game they weren't on a first name basis and the commander was a hard ass so they were afraid to talk informally to their commanding officer. Also, whatever explanation the drunk doctor gives in the third game.
I let the council die, played renegade, and just did the Vasir quest a few days ago. But I remember when Vasir takes the hostage, you have an intimidate option to distract her while Liara sneaks up behind her an bonks her with a table or some shit. I'm guessing that this dialogue comes if you ignore the intimidate option and choose the dialogue to just shoot the hostage. Either that or it IS the intimidate dialogue, and I'm just retarded and forgot.

>"Asari pureblood" it is spliced to say "Asari inbred"
I was a little confused why she was mad at Liara for being a pureblood, I assumed it was some resentment against an elitist culture of purebloods who think they're better than everybody else or something. Then later on, Samara walked into one of Harbinger's projectiles and died, then he roasted Asari for being reliant on other species for breeding. Didn't put 2 and 2 together at the time, but I'm guessing that pureblood are lower class? This is probably explained in the codices, but I skipped all the voiced ones.
lorebro save me
Also any insanity survival tips are appreciated. I beat ME2 on insanity and am going through 3 on it right now, but I'm always happy to learn more. Playing adept if it matters.
wait my bad I misspoke I think you actually have to kill the Council then oddly select the Blue Dialogue choice when Vasir takes the hostage to get Shepard to say that iirc

>she was mad at Liara for being a pureblood
It's almost like some bizarre prediction on the future of wokism. pureblood Asari are heavily discriminated by mixedblood Asari for not being "diverse" enough. I also have a semi-related fan theory that the Protheans only attempted uplifting the Asari so they can serve as their sexy concubine servants but idk

>Insanity tips appreciated
helps if I have a specific mission to give tips for. Of course you can always cheat by equipping squaddies with an N7 Typhoon, but I wouldn't recommend it unless you're a member of The Cheater's League. Bioware straight up says the OPness of the N7 Typhoon on a squadmate is glitched to unleash way too much DPS. It can even kill bosses in seconds glitching the game to trigger a stream of opening dialogue panicking about the boss after he's already dead 3 seconds into the fight

>Harbinger talking shit to Samara
He talks a lot of shit to every ME2 squadmate iirc. He shits on Thane Krios boldly claiming the Drell to be a fake and gay race for having too low of a population. He shits on Urdnot Grunt boldly claiming The Krogan to be a fake and gay race for being infected with the Genophage. He shits on Tali Zorah boldly claiming the Quarians to be a fake and gay race due to compromised immune systems. He shits on Mordin Solus boldly claiming the Salarians to be a fake and gay race because their hyper-fast metabolism makes their lifespans too short. He shits on Samara boldly claiming the Asari to be a fake and gay race because they rely on other races for reproduction. He shits on Garrus Vakarian boldly claiming Turians to be a fake and gay race because they're too narrow minded and primitive etc. I forget what he says to shittalk Legion and the Geth but he will. but he likes humans so Harbingers not racist I guess
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Unpopular opinion: What if the Genophage was wrong? I know it sounds crazy, nobody wants to be outnumbered far over 1,000 to 1 by those savage evil alien godzilla monster niggers but consider this...

Let's say 1,500 years ago the Turians fought honorably and never deployed the Genophage? The Krogan obviously win the rebellions in this case. Then what happens? They keep a few of the more useful races alive in small contained slave populations. Keep some Quarian slaves alive to repair their stuff, keep some Volus slaves alive to manage your credits, banking and finances too. Keep some Turian slaves alive to build your guns and star ships, etc. Kill the useless races who aren't even fit for slavery. This way 15 centuries later or so when The Rapers do show up they would get STOMPED by the endless quadrillions and quadrillions of Krogan. Total Raper Death! Absolute BTFO. The Rapers probably have no chance at victory so they would have to give up. Their only choice being to go find some new Galaxy to antagonize every 50,000 years because a far stronger force is currently occupying the Milky Way. This is simply Galactic Darwinism as nature intended it but the Turians screwed that up with their fake and gay sterility plague
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Is Joker exaggerating in pic related or did Shepard really kill over 9,000 Batarian soldiers in one single battle in 2176 when he was only a 21 year old "rookie"? Because holy shit that is a HUGE number!

Big if true. Dangerously based, Shepard...

This is a vid of 3 Geth Platforms trying to reach a consensus on what the best/worst guns in Mass Effect 3 are. You might find the data useful when selecting your weapon loadouts

WHOOPS my mistake, I meant to post this vid. this should be kinda helpful in terms of Insanity tips
Thread theme

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Anyone else think Jack isn't that hot? Also is there anything behind the fan theory that Jeff Moreau is a Batman comics fan, so he nicknamed himself after the Joker? And that TIM is a Mortal Kombat fan so he named his beloved pet monster girl after Sub Zero? Has Bioware ever commented on this yet? Very based if true

>Commander Jack Shepard
Ehh it doesn't make sense though because your name is too 21st Century sounding in style. Commander Blackjack Shepard would fit the late 22nd Century setting better. More natural sounding and the like, more meta... Also, Subject Zero actually has pretty good reason to choose the name Jack from her POV. She named herself that because the word "jack" is synonomous with "nothing". As in "Bro do you have 5 credits so I can catch a transport? Because I don't have Jack Shit, some Vorcha just ate my credit chit!". Jack wants to advertise how worthless she considers herself with her obscure name. Remember her secret Shadowbroker file reveals her to be a failed poet too, so go figure
good morning anons. posting more sexy femsheps
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>"You expect me to trust them? Miranda killed Wilson in cold blood! Jacob is just a nigger for hire!"
>"Miranda did exactly what was expected of her. Jacob is a soldier, one of the best. I'm not saying you have to bang them, Commander, but they will be accompanying you to Freedom's Progress."
>"Very well. I'll go get ready for the mission."

Wouldn't make sense with a double-dog based name with Galaxy Shepard or Skywalker Shepard. People would at one point or another comment on how cool and heroic your first name sounds as you walk the skies sheparding the Galaxy.
Shepard will never be a woman
Out of all 6 combat classes, can the weakest regular Shepard class still beat the strongest Femshep class in a 1v1?
>IRL woman at the controls
>no lifer e-troon playing femshep at the controls
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>Roll Femshep in ME1
>Save the Galaxy
>Import character into ME2
>Get your ship disintegrated by Collectors and die
>During Project Lazarus, TIM orders that they reconstruct Femshep into Regular Shepard
Uh oh.

>"Illusive Man... I thought we'd be meeting face-to-face?"
>"A necessary precaution, for those of us who know what you and I know... How are you feeling?"
>"How am I feeling??! Why the hell did you turn me into a boy? I deserve a truthful explanation NOW!"
>"Well, we wanted the REAL Commander Shepard, not some cheap imitation! Just consider it an upgrade."
>"AN UPGRADE? No, this is bullshit, screw you and your insanity tier of dark perverted science garbage! I'll just stop The Rapers by myself! Okay? Without any Cerberus assistance! I'm leaving, because I should, well, I should just go okay!?"
>"Miranda was worried you'd react poorly to your upgrades. Crap. Perhaps I should have listened to her opinion..."
>"Hey! Asshole! I SAID I SHOULD GO! Bye!"
>Enraged Exit.jpg
>"Well shit... Time for Plan B in that case. Somebody please bring me Shepard's clone and a bottle of 47 Thessia Red."
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Fun Fact: If Mass Effect 1 were released in 2024 instead of 2007 what do you think would be different? Because the truth is Bioware would only change ONE thing and everything else in the game would be exactly the same. The literal only difference is at the character creation menu there would be 3 gender options instead of just two. Transhep, femshep and regular Shepard. And that's not a good thing. Why would we need more than two Commander Shepards? Because modern 21st Century politics? Bah!
Colm Anders Shepard
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>Rank: N7 Staff Commander
>Name: Manguard Shepard
>Class: Vanguard biotic
>Race: Cyborg (formerly human)
>Occupation: N7 Marine (System's Alliance) Special Tactics and Reconnaissance (SPECTREs) and elite black ops terrorist (Cerberus)
>Loadout: Collector Armor. Black Widow X, Geth Plasma Shotgun X, Revenant Assault Rifle X, M-6 Carnifex Pistol X, Heavy Collector Particle Beam, M-12 Kassa Locust SMG X, inferno ammo, frostbite ammo, many biotic grenades, heavily upgraded L3 Biotic Implants with the most elite amps and an illegaly modifed Savant X omni-tool
>Carry Weight Cooldown Bonus: 200% (he never needs to cooldown)
>Squadmates: The best
>Morality: True Renegade
Who can beat him? No, not even John Chief, probably not.
Not sure if right place to ask...

How do I acquire a perfect replica "cosplay outfit" of the sleek futuristic buisness suit Kasumi gifts Shepard in Mass Effect 2? I mean I've seen images of cosplayers wearing way crazier shit than pic related, but I've never actually cosplayed before. I should also mention I don't want the ME2 formal suit for cosplay conventions or that sort of crap, I actually intend to wear it for formal occasions irl such as weddings, funerals, court, etc. Feels like the only "RPG cosplay outfit" appropriate for such events. Appropriately based, I mean.

TLdr: How do I buy an identicle suit irl to what Shepard wears in ME2's Kasumi DLC mission? Like pic related
Want more Mass Effect 4 leaks? Here are Shepard's ingame canon genders:
>Mass Effect 1: Male Shepard
>Mass Effect 2: Femshep
>Mass Effect 3: Male Shepard
>Mass Effect 4: Femshep
I'm sorry I don't like it either but Bioware already confirmed as much. At this point it is pointless to even try to debunk this new data.
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>[Warn the Fleet] greyed out
>Shooting Legion to death gave me the renegade points I would've needed to pass the check
I feel like I'm having a psychotic episode reading this thread
Wtf? Now the other anons need to take their meds because of my shitposts? Double based. Go take your pills kids.
Is this thread written by an AI?
I just got to this point, but my Shepard looked really smug as she burned for some reason.
These femsheps are boring to me. Jack is some crazy vidya and fucking romp where you can choke her a little, bang her head against the headboard, leave handprints on her ass while she bites the pillow, talk her into mutual hatefuck of Miranda or that paladin fungus cunt, and she'll claw, bite back, and love you more for it but your femsheps want you to stand in the victoria's secret or pet shop while they buy 30 pairs of mall garbage that they'll never wear or a yappy purse dog that they'll let get run over in the street and they might stare at the ceiling to get fucked like a dead fish.

>>"HNNG JACK ewww your vagina
Sounds gay, not better at all.

>Anyone else think Jack isn't that hot?
No, I think Jack is hot from me2 and insanely hot starting in ME3.

>Jack wants to advertise how worthless she considers herself with her obscure name.
No problemo, I'm happy to inject worth into bitches with my cock.
>Mall Store Recommendation Shepard

This nickname will stick.
Don't Asari breed by shocking your nervous system? I bet Asari pussy is like a low power taser, constant cock and ball torture during penetration. Ardat-Yakshi are defects with a car battery installed and have secret techniques for scraping melted dick out of themselves.

Verification not required.
I also feel like I'm having a psychotic episode from this thread, but unlike this poster I know that's just the magic of ME schizoposting flowing into me. Thanks, OP.
>Please verify that you are not a robot sir
Is this some new meme around here? Everybody accuses memelord supreme of being a Geth Infilitrator now? No I am not working for the fucking Geth goddamnit. And people call me the schizo? How ironic is that?
What I meant is that modders have made hair/outfits/animations/etc from me1 to be available in me2 and me3 (legendary edition). And items from me2 are available in me1 and me3 and vice versa. You just have to look for them, they are all on Nexusmods. You are correct about the mustaches, I never realized the variety was so limited.

Killing Miranda is pretty difficult but I did it the first time I did the Suicide Mission by accident. She was unloyal, I didn't have Zaeed or Kasumi, I'd lost Grunt and Legion and I took Garrus and Mordin with me to the final battle while Miranda was left to Hold the Line and somehow that killed her.
Just finished my trilogy playthrough. The ending isn't as bad as I expected. The kid was stupid and poorly voice acted, and the Reapers just yoinking the citadel after the Cerberus assault raises some questions, and I was surprised I didn't get a shot of Jeff being sad that I blew up his girlfriend. Still, I don't understand how it caused all the kerfuffle it did back in the day. At least it gave us MrBTongue.
First thing you should do is lat exercises
I just finished the first game and completed Omega in 2, and holy shit, 2 is so much better than 1. Anyone claiming otherwise really needs to get their head checked.
1 established nearly everything about the lore that is good, however 2 is definitely a better video game. Lorewise 2 matters not in the least.
Correct. 2 was just such a massive breath of fresh air, though. Everything in 1 looks/feels so half-cooked.
Oh mah bad! Wasn't I supposed to be offering you insanity tips? Looks like you were able to handle it without my council, good job gettin gud champ. My bad on all the delayed responses anons, irl has me busy at the moment. wish I had 24 hours a day to just post sexy femsheps/Insanity Tips/unapologetically meta greentexts/Lores/etc but some of Mass Effect chads actually have lives

pro tips? bro in my drunken shitposting last week I totally forgot to mention to you how Energy Drain is like nearly universally regarded as the most useful ME3 bonus power on Insanity for all Combat Classes. It almost makes the game slightly too easy, but it is my go to ME3 bonus power for my occasional ME3 zero-death runs. And you can't get Energy Drain if Tali dies in ME2, she gifts you the power when you recruit her halfway through the main quest. Once had a Colonist/SS Shep who accidentally got Tali+Garrus killed in ME2 and everyone else survived. When the Quarian Admiralty Board boarded my Normandy SR-2 in that playthru my ptsd Shepard was in-universe RP seething:

>"CRAP if only Tali were here! I bet she'd invent some top tier Omni-Tool move for me to obliterate Rapers, Geth and Cerberus forces with ease right now. ffs why didn't I fucking bang her? And Garrus was based too, for a Turian, I miss that little nigga like you cant believe"

Another ME3 Insanity Tip I forgot to mention? People mistakenly say you can only be rich in ME1, which is incorrect. Even on Insanity, it is incredibly easy in ME3 to quickly earn 10 Million Credits (max inventory), purchase everything in the game, and quickly get back up to 10 millie again. All you have to do is kick butt in the Armax Aresenal Arena. Players find it weird you're rich in ME1 and ME3 but always fucking broke in ME2, but luckily there is a cope that works for virtually every RP. Simply headcanon your Shepard spends almost all of his vast ME1 fortune "off screen" upgrading his Star Ship and funding Mordin's research projects!
Anybody have plans for this Batarian History Month? I do. I'm taking my absolute strongest Krogan squadmate and my space waifu to the Sahrabarik system. Omega. We'll be spending the next 29 days kicking the fucking shit out of every Batarian we meet. Men, women, children. Don't even need to bring my SPECRTE loiscence, murder is already legal on Omega. Should be a pretty productive vacation to test out all our new ammo and tech upgrades and shit but primarily we simply wish to honor Batarian holidays I.E. this is a month long detour from our mq mission.

>You are correct about the mustaches, I never realized the variety was so limited.
How do you even remember how to find your own asshole if you "never realized" the Mass Effect Trilogy's most substantial flaw? This is something that pisses me off in any RPG with a character creator, a lack of mustache options. I'm biased because I have one of the most handsome mustaches on the US East Coast irl, strangers of all races and genders matter-of-factly approach me on a weekly basis to inform me they think my mustache is based as hell (not in those exact words verbatim usually). I mean I don't typically roleplay as a "clone of myself" in RPGs, yet in any game where my guy doesn't have a World Class tier badass mustache, I certainly find it far more difficult to self-insert "into character". So no surprise why I of all anons would find it downright fucking criminal how shitty the mustache choices are in the Mass Effect Trilogy!
If that's the case, I'm sure you'll love 3.
>Sounds gay, not better at all.
Good job soldier. You missed the mark. My Jack greentext was sexy because of the impossibly exaggerated odor of Jack's pussy. Irl I prefer my pussies as stinky as possible, the stinkier the better. SO IMAGINE THE SMELL! Imagine the smell in this scenario... That pussy would taste and smell Divine.

Let me try to explain why the greentext is sexy. Picture an absolute hardcore badass who doesn't afraid of anything. Like let's say Cyber-Shepard, or perhaps Urdnot Grunt here for example. Imagine Commander Shepard or Grunt is performing cunnilingus on Kasumi Goto's pretty little Japanese teenage space vagina, but they can't handle the smell, it is too stinky so they cower out and give up. As I try to picture this scenario in my head, I envision Kasumi's pussyvagina being the holiest scent I ever encountered. and now I have take some fap breaks tonight because I can't stop craving Kasumi's supernatural-tier Stinky private parts, which sucks cause I'll wake up slightly tired tommorrow after so much cooming tonight and I'm supposed to be seeing my lawyer tommorrow morning but whatever idc
I'm inclined to agree on most fronts, however there was one major sticking point that I noticed again on my most recent playthrough, after not playing for about a decade.

Fuck ammo clips. Overheating is a way better reload system. They even had a lore justification and everything, and then they threw it away because people in 2010 needed shiny ammo pickups for the game to be considered good.
>Jack is some crazy vidya and fucking romp you can choke her, bang her head against the refined titanium, talk her into mutual hatefuck of Miranda, she'll claw, bite back, and love you more for it but your femsheps wish only to go shopping and to stare at the ceiling to get fucked like a dead fish.
Inaccurate. You dont understand RP 101. She can be as degenerate as you wish during fade2black scenes. 100% up to player headcanon decision what happens during them. You can even roleplay she forces a VERY reluctant Garrus to eat her feces. Or vice versa, you can roleplay she has a perverted obsession with consuming Turian feces. You can do this headcanoning with any romance option in the game, with the only semi-exception being Tali Zorah, who would die for Lore reasons if she ate Commander Shepards poopies. This doesn't mean Shepard cant consume Tali's poopies. Plus it's hardly of stretch in terms of headcanoning the Lores to assume Shepard ordered Mordin to invent a pill that lets Tali her beloved boyfriend's shit without her dying

Jack is a perverted maniac but there's literally no Lore reason you can not roleplay Femshep isn't 5 times more perverted than Jack during her private fade2black scenes. Plus Jack isn't even that sexy of a name. A name alone can dictate both a woman's beauty and her value to society in many cases. Ironically how this redpill conversation is about Jack, as there was a cute girl named Jackie who had an agreeable personality and was kinky as hell and had a huge crush on me, but I had reject her warm advances I.E. tell her to get lost because I thought her name was too fucking stupid-sounding. But the thing is femshep has the potential to easily be the cutest girl on the ship because she is the only girl who's name is customizable according to player choice. You can make her even more alluring than Kasumi by coming up with an extra sexy meta name. The potential is limitless. Commander Uranus Shepard? Commander Moo Moo Shepard? etc
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What happens if Grunt were actually a romance option in vanilla? Are we calling femshep a pedophile on this account? Or is it okay since the typical Krogan reaches full sexual and emotional maturity 2 weeks after his birth anyway and Mass Effect 2 takes place across the span of 7 months so Grunt isn't technically underage anymore by the time you complete Horizon. But doesn't Grunt view his Battlemaster/Commander as a father/mother figure? That kind of gives their relationship incestous vibes in a way which definitely makes the relationship even more based. Could have been launch content but I guess EA and/or Bioware was too afraid to take risks?

>Lorebro save me!
There is a very common misconception among Mass Effect fans that ME1 proves Commander Shepard is a pedo. But as I just said 1 seconds ago this is a total misconception. ME1 Liara says "Age 106 is considered barely even an adult" by her people, Liara does not say "Age 106 is considered literally still just a child" by her people. So she's definitely legal, but Shepard is still banging them fresh out of High School here. So there's actually no ingame evidence in ME1 that Shepard is a pedophile, however that does not necessarily imply that he isn't one either actually. The absence of evidence is not the evidence of absence. Just because you don't see Shepard banging kids on screen ingame doesn't mean he never has, its not as if we see Shepard's entire career ingame, we only see but a fraction of it. And I actually have this theory that irl way more than 50% of American males secretly wish they were invited to Jeffrey Epstein's island. Essentially we have no way of knowing whether Commander Shepard is a kiddie sniffer or if he isn't because the games are careful to leave this cloudy af by neither confirming nor denying such info ultimately making the Lore a little bit more interpretive overall here because the truth is we simply don't know, we can merely speculate.
Is this thread just one retard dumping massive text walls at himself
>Energy drain good
I didn't use it, but I can see why it'd be strong. Being able to delete shields and be tankier at the same time would be very nice. I used defensive matrix for most of the game, the extra survivability was a godsend. It made it much easier to survive needing to run from cover when a grenade or banshee landed next to me.
>Armax Arsenal Arena
I completely missed this kek. I may be slightly blind or retarded. Thanks for the tips, anon.
You were the anon playing adapt? Flare is a very Lore friendly bonus power for the class and super fun to use in general, but still nowehere near as handy as Energy Drain. For ME2, I'd say the best bonus power is Mordin's Neural Shock speced to area damage. The cooldown time is insanely quick so you never need to worry about red health bar enemies ever again as you can simply freeze them all. Biotic Stasis is another handy ME2 Bonus power as it works on enemies of Blue, Red, Purple and Yellow lifebars, even big shit like Gunships and YMIR mechas, problem is the Stasis cooldown time is rather lengthy
it definitely is, this shit reads like some horrible chatgpt generated word salad
Heads up everybody. There are very serious rumors floating around that this thread is not organic, quite the literal opposite, that this thread is in fact some secret Geth psyop or something actually. Pretty big if true. Please exercise extreme caution anons. So far our investigation attempts have dug up little-to-no data that confirms these rumors but it often pays off handsomely to always be obsessively suspicious at all times, to stay extra vigilant. Always suspect /vrpg/ is at high risk of Geth infiltration, even when it is not. Popular to contrary belief, Geth DO infiltrate. So stay alert, and if I learn any new information regarding the Geth situation I'll feed you any updates I can get you guys

HOLY SHIT you're definetly right they must have invented some type of new self-aware AI Syntetic Race lately that are capable of experiancing and enjoying alchohol intoxication. But are they in the thread with us right now...?
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>Thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule to save /vrpg/ boss
You're very welcome. I'm here to help and I'm good at solving problems. I've got my plate full lately cleaning up our cold dark universe, but luckily for you nerds this goes beyond my irl duties such as attempting to repair eveybody's broken marriages and researching ways to cure sicknesses inflicted upon human society by mRNA vaccines and redpilling normies by naming the Vol Clan and ghostwriting people's books and fixing any damaged items and pissing on women's toilet seats and feeding the hungry and making people laugh and etc. Because this very same job description also of course extends outside irl into cyberspace. Because why wouldn't it? So in other words I find myself honorbound to insert some much needed soul into your cold, dark 4chan boards such as /vrpg/ to solve your problems for you.

Each game in the trilogy is a huge step forward and a huge step backward. ME1 Citadel felt way closer to an actual city compared to the tiny cramped ME2 Citadel to name one example. And some fans enjoy how ME1 is about as close to it gets to a Star Trek RPG, and even the fans who actively despise Star Trek often will feel this way.
>"Your ships AMAZING Shepard! Ive never seen a Drive Core so advanced! I cant believe you were able to fit into a ship this small!! I'm starting to u.."
>"That I did, Tali! It certainly isn't the only very Massive object that In know how to into fit in a very tiny little slot"
>"You, what?"
>"I'll explain how later"
>"Okay. Like I was saying! Seeing how incredibly based your ship's tech is, I'm starting to understand why humans are so successful! I had no idea Alliance Vessels were so advanced!"
>"Yes. Probably the most advanced ever made. Plus now that Im a SPECTRE it wont be long until my people are ruling the Galaxy and fixing all your petty messes"
>"Awesomesauce! I dont doubt it Shepard! A month ago I was patching a make-shift fuel line on to a converted tug ship on the Flotilla... but now!? I'm sitting on board one of the most advanced vessels in Citadel Space!! I have to thank you again for taking me with you! This is a dream come true!!"
>"I had no idea you found ship technology so based"
>"Its because Im a Quarian! The Migrant Fleet is the key to the survival of muh people! Ships are our most valuable resource! But we don't have ANYTHING like this! We make do with castoffs and 2nd hand equi.."
>"I want to talk about something else!"
>"Like what?"
>"Tell me about the Pilgrimage"
>"When my people reach puberty, we leave our birth-ships to wander the Galaxy. To prove our worth we must embark on Pilgrimage to find worthwhile gifts for a new ship to join. It helps us gather resources and maintain genetic diversi.."
>"I want to talk about something else!"
>"Like what?
>"I have questions about the Geth!"
>"I doubt I can tell you anything you don't already know! Its been over 3 centuries since they drove my people into exile. All I know is the story of their origins, what they were when we created them, how they turned on us.."
oh crap getting close to the character limit sorry i'll just post the 2nd half of your Tali greentext later guys. I should go
So much talk just to rizz little Tali when Liara falls in love just by staring at you.
True. But perhaps the real question is what if the Quarians played it safe and never invaded Rannoch during Mass Effect 3? What would the Geth do here? Would the Geth team up with the Rapers? Or would the Geth choose to side with Commander Conker Shepard?
They would team up with the Reapers. Eventually the Geth deemed it necessary to preserve themselves, and the Reapers wouldn't stop finding ways to control them anyhow.
If we were to go by onscreen interactions only, then every romance just pets Shepard's ass for 5 seconds before engaging the Chinese hibernation-sexmotron. That's where it fades to black, nothing happens, they claim they had sex, and maybe they did because there's a billion more of the fuckers shitting out brittle concrete in their 18 generation long real estate scam.
I had never pondered the implications of the Pilgrimage before. Do Quarians, like humans, hit puberty at around 10-13? Are there bands of Quarian girl scouts selling overpriced nutrient bars to fund their new battleship?
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>Is Tali underaged?
I guess you're not very into planet scanning since the best bioware easter egg flew over your head. At the start of Mass Effect 1 Tali is 22 Earth years old. But if you fly over to the Tikkun system, scan her homeworld, jot down the orbital rotation periods and hours per day and have your ship's AI run the numbers? It turns out Tali is 14 Rannoch years old. This is clearly a shoutout to Mission Vao, the "other" delictable age 14 alien Bioware squaddie. Truly the most based Easter Egg of all time, literally as if Bioware is subtley shouting a "secret message" at observant high IQ Mass Fans shouting:

>"Yeah you're welcome, and sorry we can't get away with it anymore like we used to in 2003. We have to be more subtle now, but we still at least try to get away with it. It's just the thing is you have NO IDEA how much our pressure we are under from our higher-ups to not be allowed to get away with it anymore now! But hey, here we are, subtley saying we want to get away with it for the sake of the true fans."

As for why players call Tali best girl? Little things, like how even though she's one of the smartest members of an already high IQ race, she still somehow gives off erotic vibes similar to a student who has a crush on her teacher. Or a little sister who has a crush on her older brother. Which is pretty sexy if you want my personal opinion. And her cybernetic sounding Russian accent is a Massive turn-on too. And its especially cute how Tali Zorah has two giant toes, instead of having 5 tiny toes like human girls tend to have. In that sense Tali is essentially the Holy Grail for foot fetishists. For example I doubt Quentin Taratino plays Mass Effect, but it definetly would not surprise me if he knows who Tali Zorah is seeing as he probably does fap to her youtube segments sometimes

>No! You can not have sex in Outer Space! Wanna know why not? BECAUSE YOU JUST CAN'T FUCK IN SPACE BECAUSE OF FUCKING LORE REASONS AND SHIT! OKAY?
Wtf? How do you even know this? Are you a Geth yourself? Because I keep hearing /vrpg/ is currently in Code Red Advisory mode for Geth infiltration risk levels right now at this very moment actually. Can you please verify that you are human for our peace of mind sir? Can't be too careful when it comes to robots
>Schizo math and space jailbait
I kneel.
On that note, starting to notice a pattern: Bioware's output turned to shit (I mean really turned to shit) when they stopped putting fucked up teenagers and/or retard-savants in their games. DA:O was the last completely good one with Sandal, ME 2 and 3 were shitted up in multiple ways but carried by Tali and Liara's literal and figurative asses

>Tali feet
Look man, I'm not into feet. Like at all. But I gotta admit, Tali's feet are soaking in that suit 24/7. She can't take it off for fear of dying, but any foot man who could get in her pants might find it like the apple Eve gave unto Adam.
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>Based retard-savants such as Sandal
Whats Sandal's Lore? Hes the best enchanter alive because of refined turbo autism, right? Can he make literally any kind of enchantment I can think to ask him? Because if he can't make any concievable enchantment imaginable he should concentrate on leveling up his autism

>Can Sandal make a ring I equip to turn myself into nigger or an Orc? Just in case I feel like going nigger-mode or Orc-mode for a bit
>Can Sandal make a ring I equip to turn myself invisible?
>Can Sandal make me a ring to transform me into Hitler or Kim Jung Un or Hillary Clinton or etc?
>Can Sandal make me a ring that can make me Immortal?
>Can Sandal make rings that turn me into a gender swapped verision of myself?
>Can Sandal make me a ring that turns me into God or at least allow me to speak with God?
>Does Sandal have the required autism powerlevels make "ctrl v" perfect copies of potent enchanted items, like Master Neloth can copy Hermaeus Mora Black Books?
>Can Sandal make a ring that gives me 100% immunity to all diseases, viruses, poisons etc?
>Can Sandal upgrade my Super Mario Bong with a correlative enchantment; the more talented the smoker is at difficult vidya games, the more intoxicated the bong will get him?
>Can Sandal make me a ring that grants me total Diplomatic Immunity I.E. If I murder/steal/masturbate in public, police won't charge me with any felonies
>Can Sandal make me a ring that gives me mastery over a completely foreign language while equipped or double the size of my wang?
>Can Sandal make me a ring that doubles my IQ?
>Can Sandal make me a ring that triples my IQ?
>Can Sandal make me a ring that turns my gf into a loli and give her a tail?
Just a few examples of useful enchantments I can think of off the top of my head. Is Sandal capable of clutching these enchantments for me on command to upgrade my rings? And if not, why? Wtf was his problem? Was he still not fucking autism enough to be the best enchanter a man can be?
It's not just the eyewitness account, Anderson knows that it's entirely within Saren's character to slaughter random humans, something the Council doesn't believe. Funnily, he's right for the wrong reasons.
>Anderson knows that it's entirely within Saren's character to slaughter random humans
True but this isn't exactly a criticism unique to Saren Arterius, thats more of criticism directed at SPECTRE agents in general. It is also entirely well within Shepard's character to slaughter random Batarians for example. More than 90% of SPECTREs are racist violent Renegade assholes and it has been like that for centuries. Anderson knows this, The Council knows this and they don't even care. SPECTREs being violent and racist is nothing new
Sandal can do most of these things (iirc God is canonically dead on the toilet in Dragon Age) but he keeps them for himself. The gender-swap rings are actually how the current Sandal was born, via generations of selective selfcest inbreeding with Sandal's mother being both a perfect genderswapped clone AND wearing the nigger ring. This resulted in a cascade of paradoxical extra chromosomes that turned our lord and savior's current vessel into the chadly form we see at our camp.
Fan Theory: Nobody except maybe your pilot would really even remember trivial historical earth data that modern people irl currently consider "important" like Hitler or Final Fantasy 7 etc since they're living in the future. So. If you named your guy Commander Adolf Cloud Shepard and then even literally select Soldier Class pretty much nobody in-universe would know wtf Shepard's first and middle names even mean except for EDI, Joker, Mordin, Miranda and Legion. Maybe Thane Krios might have heard Adolf Hitler's or Cloud Strife's names uttered once or twice and Thane obviously never forgot the names, but he just recalls those 2 names being mentioned in passing it's not like Thane knows the stories associated with Cloud or Hitler so he still really wouldn't "get" Shepard's names per say, unlike say Professor Solus who certainly would "get" the naming reference and kek at Cloud choosing the Soldier class. This of course makes it feel pretty immersion shattering that Mordin never makes any offhand comment about the Holocaust or the Shinra Electric Company ingame should you decide to name your Shepard that

For you
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OP here. No reason to make yet another fucking blasted FF8 thread so I'll ask here I guess. Wtf should I even name my FF8 summons? I just started a game with Squall named Adolf and named my two starter summons Quetzcoal and Shiva I named Muhammad and Aishah. Very comfy FF8 playthrough so far. Probably going to name Ifrit as Satan. Also I might just get to the end of Disc 1 and call it quits when Adolf "dies" (into time compression)
yeah this is the biggest flaw of ME1, shepard makes horrible arguments to the council and then the game portrays them as backward and ignorant for refusing his unlikely claims
Saren Arterius has no left arm (biologically). In it's place he has a Geth arm. You even witness this phenomena when you see Saren's hologram in the Citadel Tower Council chambers. Why can Shepard not point that clear fact out to the Council? The man is literally at least 10% Geth pound-for-pound here. You can't even say Saren is 100% Turian anymore, at least not in terms of visual appearance

And the Council still desperately tried to cover his "Turian" ass and do everything possible to impede Commander Shepard from exposing Saren as an obvious Geth agent/infiltraitor
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>Why did guns suddenly stop having infinite ammo in 2185?
You can thank Volus greed and presumably their marketing ethics (or lack of marketing ethics) for making those horrendously overpriced thermal clips go mainstream.
Literally the DLC cycle
I like how that scene shows of much of an asshole Soverign truly is. When he's indoctrinating Saren he randomly decides to switch the red LED lights on and off for no other reason than to troll Saren and be rude to his pawn. Red LED lights are not required for the Indoctrination process, Soveriegn could've just hit Saren with an Indoctrination wave without the bizarre red lightswitch rave here. But no. Presumably he was pretty pissed at Saren for failing the mission too, and clearly he could not nuke Eden Prime from orbit himself out of fear of revealing his Very High powerlevel to the Galaxy too early
They could've had the best of both worlds by just having Shepard reuse the clips. It's not like running out of ammo was ever really factored in for long-term gameplay (except the heavy weapons which already had their own ammo). They're fucking heat SINKS, why not just have two in the gun and one is venting while the other is soaking!?
How would this maximize Volus profits?
>Use these eyes on my ME1 Shep
>Big lashes + black eye makeup give it this heavy-lidded look
>get to ME2, this eye preset no longer has any lashes
>Shepard just looks tired all the time now
The annoying thing is that in the character creator, the big eye lashes are still there. They only go away once you get in-game for some fucking reason. Maybe PS4 graphics settings cull them or something.
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>Be God himself
>Give birth to the material universe and all life as we know it
>Have to take a Massive Divine shit
>Shit yourself to death
Interesting take on RPG creator-deity Lore I suppose
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>Shepard just looks tired all the time
That's realistic. You'd look tired too if you were a SPECTRE, it's a very difficult and demanding job that often works you around the Galactic clock all week
It would minimize them like God, Blasto and Commander Hitler Shepard XVII intended
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>"The Geth were originally created as an automated manual labor force. Initially their INT was as limited as any VI, overtime we made small modifications to their programming to allow them to perform more complex tasks, bringing and closer to true AI Status"
>"Thats illegal! How come the Council didn't step in and cuck you?"
>"This wasn't true AI research! We may of been skirting the bounds of the law, but we weren't doing anything literally illegal! The changes were so insignificant, so gradual, that we were able to control them.. or so we thought! But one thing we underestimated was the powerlevel of the Neural Network! Over 6 million Geth thinking simultaneously creates an inherently unstable matrix!"
>"So the are Geth autistic? Some sort of group-consciousnesses who can share sensory data?"
>"No nothing like that! Many of the Geth's logic syst.."
>"That doesnt make any sense!"
>"Im probably over-simplifying, the Geth are incredibly adva.."
>"Can the Geth meme?"
>"Im not sure, can you elaborate?"
>"I was browsing the extranet last evening. Keywords [Space 4chan]"
>"Oh I like that website, but Im a bit of a newfag there! Go on"
>"I found a cool thread for a Role Playing Vid I enjoy, Galaxy of Fantasy. Everything seemed off about the thread though, the meme game was too solid and the autisms seemingly beyond organic potential"
>"I love that game! And yes Shepard, I already saw the thread, RP tips for naming your GoF toon? You suspect this thread was posted by Geth, Commander? Hm. Like a PsyOp meme extranet infiltration?"
>"Than my instincts were accurate, Shepard. I informed the Migrant Fleet of that thread 2 weeks ago. Millions of my people are now living under Marshall Law until all risk situations are properly assessed"
>"You're kidding!"
>"Of course I'm kidding! I made that thread, Commander! Only a Quarian is autistic enough to meme on that level!"
>"I should go. I have a Galaxy to save!"
>"See you later!"
happy Valentines Day
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>pic related
>applauding his own films
How often does he even do that? I imagine If I was even half as narcissistic as Shia Lebr00f is I would probably screencap every 4chan post I make ever and sometimes (when I get bored) I'd command my Butler to dictate it all back-to-back to be in an exaggerated dramatic fashion, while also praying this never bites me in the ass backfiring by somehow having my entire 4chan post history suddenly revealed in court before a judge someday resulting in a level 100 meToo scandal
>"Don't get cocky, Garrus. I let you win this round..."
>"Heh! Wait, you what? Explain."
>"I'm frozen at only 38.5% hardness rn. Why do you think everybody is always ignoring you and hitting on me? Hell you made that same incel jab at yourself on Omega last tour, ring a bell?"
>"Mathmatically impossible, for your kind especially! Bullshit, as you humans say, put your creds where your mouth is at Commander!!"
>"Adrenaline Rush.jpg
>"WOW Impressive cock, Shepard! Holy crap!! With that boner, you can unlock unlimited power! As far as I'm concerned The Rapers don't stand a blind pyjak's ass in Hell's chance of survival against your dick, if I were Harbinger I'd be absolutely shitting myself right now sir!"
>"Now you get it? That's exactly what I've been trying to explain to you, Garrus. Unlike myself, you're still a rookie whose not ready to join the SPECTREs, you never were bro, and you never will be! You will never even constitute as being halfway qualifed enough to ever even be seriously considered for become a fucking SPECTRE, Garrus! Is that clear?"
>"Understood. I kneel, Commander."
my bad honestly I must apologize I am typically utterly fearless never suffering even a single second of autism/anxiety/doubt/depression/etc like 364 days a year. The fucking 13th of Sun's Dawn EST is the Sol exception pretty much the one moment of Sol's Orbital 365 period my meme game automatically goes to COMPLETE FUCKING SHIT but have a sexy femshep to compensate bros pic relateds
>"Admirals that's all nice and good, but with all due respect? I didn't come here today to bang one of your people. I came to bang one of mine."
>"Understood, Commander. Keelah Salhei!"
>lorebro save me
Pic related is literally the most retarded Krogan in the entire Mass Effect Trilogy. In that regard, he is the most Pure Krogan ever through a certain point of view, even more Pure than Urdnot Grunt perhaps? On Tuchanka it is a considered a Tremendous Honor to be voted the most Retarded Krogan in the Galaxy, its just Krogan Culture is bizarre like that but its okay its just dey culture so nobody is actually calling anybody a racist or anything

Pro Tip: When debating Gatatog Uvenk, always skip the headbutt Renegade Interrupt, then select white option "You dare defy a Shaman?" then select the blue option "You argue like an alien" and Shepard unleashes what may very well be the most savage burn he issues to any NPC in the entire trilogy (and the hilarity level triples because he's saying it to the most retarded man on the most retarded planet)

>"Are you actually being serious? This is about Politics!! What the hell, I thought this was Tuchanka, not Khaje? Are you a Krogan or a sissy Hanar poet? You maneuver like the Citadel Council! Does your Krant also fight with words?"

Then the Shaman (over 9,000 years old btw. Oldest NPC in the game except for Rapers) joins in and starts roasting Uvenk

>"Hah! You challenge with words, humans natural weapon? And your Krant sees how your position weakens! Now they no longer respect you, cuck!"

>God, Blasto and Commander Hitler Shepard XVII
Incredibly unbeatable squad, very possible this is actually strongest possible squad in any "3some RPG" ever made to date. Commander Hitler Shepard XVII has remarkable leadership/tactical skills and makes exceptional usage of the Engineer Combat Class. Meanwhile Blasto is rumored to have the most powerful biotics of any SPECTRE in all of Galactic History, this seems legit desu likely not even a "rumor" at all. And when in doubt for who to pick as a 3rd OP squaddie for a really tough mission? The wisest choice is to simply go with God
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>Be Kasumi Goto
>The most mary sue NPC in the game
>But also Shepard's weakest squadmate
wtf is this time paradox?
What the plot of ME4 should be:
>Destroy is cannon
>Destroy is rewritten as being a mega EMP blast that primarily targeted reapertech but also normal tech to some extent
>Geth managed to somewhat protect themselves and thus survived
>Joker salvaged EDIs data but the dumb sexo body is crisp
>Its the dark age of technology for the galactic community
>Unreliable Relay replacements are coming together, but a lot of tech and data is lost
>Shepard survived but went away Luke Skywalker style
>Piracy, rogue states and a shattered galactic community follow after an economic and social collapse
>The united fleet from the end of ME3 became a defacto police force and a semi-dictatorial peacekeeping force trying to keep it all together
>ME4 plot is all about low tier problems and setting up the next trilogy that is about rebuilding and fighting off a less powerful but more insidious threat, bonus points if its from a non-Relay based civilization that stumbles across one of the relay worlds.
She felt like a joke character to me. All I can remember are her horny one liners.
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>"Hey Shep!!"
>"What's the story behind that painting over there?"
>"Okay I HAVE TO ask! What exactly does Miranda's vagina look like?? Like, the perfect vagina? Because, like, wow!!!"
>"You, what? I should go."
>"Come back later! I'm sure I'll have more to talk about!"
How? In what way was Miss Goto a joke character what is the joke here? The joke being
she's being completely 100% sarcastic when she swoons over Black Kaiden's bbc as her primary trolling technique to cope with her overwhelming unhealthy hatred/phobia of black people?

She's also there sqaud character we don't know her age, she may very well be underaged which may provide explanation for why we can't bang her for Lore reasons ingame?
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what happens if you take off Kasumi's hood? will she die in extreme pain?

yes just like with her greybox... sad
>Anyone else think Jack isn't that hot?
She literally have the best face among human characters
Also, she brutally moggs trAshley in military gurl role
>Retard Krogan are honored
Makes perfect sense. Any sapient race can think about a problem like a total quadless faggot, but those with real quads can put down the book and start hitting things until everything is either dead or worshipping your lizard dick (or both)
Fuck, I'd play that. Hell, they could even salvage part of Andromeda by making their sooper speshull long-range FTL drives a plot device. Like, find an Initiative base that mentions one and that kicks off an arms race with some shitlord empires, all of whom want to be the first to control the trade lanes.
I know it'd be easier (and probably better) to just forget that game exists entirely, but I have a healthy respect for people who can take the good parts of a shitty entry and make it make the new stuff better
Sounds awful. Here is what they actually need to do for Mass Effect 4:
>Urdnot Grunt is the primary antagonist, he still deeply respects Shepard so he displays his inter-species friendship the traditional Krogan way, by leading his clan to attempt to genocide the human race, in Grunt's mind he's doing Shepard a huge favor by challenging him I.E. he does not want Shepard going soft on him
>Humans have technological dominance in the Galaxy because Shepard did NOT nuke the Collector Homeworld
>Destroy/Refusal/Synth/Control never happened. Bioware's PR team confirmed it canon that Star Brat is making every attempt to decieve Shepard with lies. No reason to retcon the Lores to make him suddenly Shepard's super honest biffer to appease retarded&autistic ME3 fans
>Cyber-Shepard is playable character. Buzz Aldrin promised us "One more story..." about Shepard, and nobody wants EA to cuck Shepard like Disney cucked Luke Skywalker I.E. ME4 Shepard would try to murder Kaiden's son in his sleep (and fail), give up fighting, abandon his crew, exile himself on an uncharted island for decades so he can cry in a cave whilst the Galaxy crumbles around him, get lectured by a Mary Sue teenager about responsibility, then die nonsensically. NOBODY wanted that for Luke and NOBODY wants that for Shepard
>The Geth invented new types of platforms that can get drunk! which makes them far more deadly in combat, very similar to Jackie Chan himself
The idea of an AI thats capable of experiancing intoxication (thus increasing his combat prowess) might sound odd but the idea is nothing new in SciFi gaming genre. For example, in MM11, Dr.Wily invents Acid Man, an ingame boss who can (unlike other robots in MM Lore) consume LSD Acid to achieve intoxication, and the more Acid he takes the stronger/faster/smarter he becomes until the high wears off. So why wouldn't the Geth try something similar? The Geth should just invent a platform that fights FAR more effectively while drunk in ME4
>current year
>still playing bioware slop
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>"Hehehe... I was afraid you wouldn't make it in time, Shepard!"
>"Had to ice a few million of your followers on my way here, sorry to keep you waiting! Let's end this!"
>"You're pretty good but you've already lost! You know that, don't you!? In a few minutes Sovereign will have full control of ALL the Citadel's systems! The relay will open! The Rapers will return!"
>"I've still got a few tricks left up my sleeve, shithole!"
>"You survived our encounter on Virmire! But I've changed since then! Improved! Sovereign has upgraded me!"
>"You let Sovereign implant you!? Are you fucking schizo!?"
>"I suppose I should thank you, Shepard! After Virmire, I couldn't stop worrying about what you said! About Sovereign """manipulating""" me! About """Indoctrination"""! The thoughts began eating away at me! Sovereign sensed my hesitation! I was implanted to strengthen my resolve! Now I trust Sovereign completely! I understand The Rapers need organics! Join us, and Sovereign will find a place for you too, Shepard!"
>"You're Indoctrinated, moron! I'd rather die than live like a slave!"
>"Then you will die! Everyone! Everyone you know and love will die! DIES! Don't you understand!? The Rapers are too strong! The cycle can't be stopped! Total Prothean Genocide happened 50,000 years ago because of will of The Rapers!! It will happen again tonight!"
>"Damnit! Some part of you must still realize this is wrong! You can fight this!"
>"NO! I.. I.. the cycle wil.."
>"Goodbye, Shepard. Thank you."
>"Wrex! Go make sure he's actually dead . . "
>"Aye Aye sir! Copy that, ShepUrd!"

so youre saying space is fake right bro? or space is gey? or both? wat?
>"EDI, what section of the ship is Tali Zorah in right now?"
>"Tali is currently located in the Main Forward Battery on the crew deck, Shepard. She volunteered to assist Garrus Vakarian with calibrations 4 hours ago."
>"WTF? Jesus, EDI, warn me next time this occurs you idiotic fucking shortbus robotic autist pea brain! Fuck!"
>"My apologies. Is their a problem, Shepard?"
>"Well no, actually, not precisely, EDI. No problem. Not my problem, anyway. Cancel my scheduled flight to the Citadel Zakera Ward tommorrow. Oh! And while you're at it, go ahead and cancel my scheduled flight to the Migrant Fleet this Saturday as well."
>"ah. I see... Very well. Is there anything else I can do for you, Shepard?"
>"Logging you out, Commander."

The problem is he's also the most cucked Krogan, or at least tied for the most cowardly with Kareck. Those are the only 2 Krogans in the trilogy that camp rather than charge you, or at least Gatatog Uvenk is only scripted to charge after you kill all 7 Krogans in his krantt. It'd be a more effective strategy to charge in with your krantt instead of waiting until they're all dead to charge alone. Grunt even tells you he does not consider TIM a true Battlemaster because he hides instead of leading his clan into battle himself. So despite his legendary retardation perhaps Gatatog Jewvenk was not pure Krogan after all with things re-considered. For the record Grunt himself thinks no-name is the most retarded Krogan ever, he does not understand why he willingly subjects himself to unfathomable brutal alien torture for centuries to gain insight into "Krogan religion". Grunt gives no fucks about that crap, cares only for food, battle and sex. Like Krogan Goku
Does this mean Grunt's cryopod was a hyperbolic time chamber?
In a certain manner of speaking yes actually, kind of, but, no. Not exactly. Maybe idk

First of all we don't know how long Grunt was even in that tank, hell he could be 1 years old or 30 years old in there. We do not know when Okeer started working on Grunt, could be he was trying to forge the perfect Tankbred for decades before Commander Birdshit Shepard even set foot on Eden Prime!

But Grunt describes the tank talking to him, comparing its method of imparting knowledge to reading a book to a child "but not with ears" or something. The thing is that would have to be a Loo00o0ong fucking "audio book" for Grunt to "mentally download". Okeer is a pretty old guy, think back to when the virgin Mary allegedly birthed Jesus 2024 years ago. Okeer was already a multi-centuries old man at that point in our own "ancient times" I.E. Warlord Okeer is much older than even our Lord Jesus Christ himself! So how is he going to preach a "2,200+ year long storybook" containing (but hardly limited to) hateful schizo krogan bs, scientific knowledge, ALL known Krogan history ever, extensive combat training, varren handling, terrorist training, detailed alien anatomy files, Krogan linguistics, explosives expertise, M-3000 Claymore shotgun crafting, potty training, Galactic linguistics and etc to his perfect tankbred son in just 1 to 50 years? Unless Grunt's pod had had time dialation technology similar to the Hyberbolic Time Chamber Z-Squad trains for battle in? Yeah...

Also worth noting Warlord Okeer is not only the most based Krogan in the trilogy he is also the most schizo Krogan you encounter too. He is the only Krogan who considers the genophage a blessing instead of a curse. He welcomes the genophage as his worthy enemy which must be "ignored" because "ignoring" an enemy is simply the most chad statement a Krogan can ever make. The man truly holds absolute peak Krogan wisdom I'd say his logic is very sound from Pure Krogan cultural POV
Holy shit I had no idea we witness the death of a god in every ME2 run
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Warlord Okeer never claims to be a God. It's not as if he is Holier than Jesus Christ, but Okeer is chronologically older than Jesus Christ. The man was already hundreds of years old in during Earth year 0 AD when Jesus was allegedly born

Sovereign larps as a God, but probably just because he wants organics to blindly worship him. It makes the Indoctrination process easier scientifically if you introduce yourself by saying stuff like:


That way, the 1% of your subconscious mind that wonders if the God-boasting is legitimately accurate will open the rest of your brain up to smoother more efficient Indoctrination going forward sorta. A common Raper speechcraft manuever and a logical lie for Soveriegn to tell literally everyone
Jack's face looks like a whore. She was probably modeled off some porn actress who was never credited, or even informed

Pre-legendary ME2 Miranda had the best face, which was butchered in all future games. When I met her in ME3 for the first time I assumed she had undergone plastic surgery to intentionally make herself uglier for whatever reason and the game would eventually provide valid Lore explanation as to wtf happened to her cute face. But since the game gave us no fucking Lore at all here, it only served to fuel my suspicions that EA Corporation is run by braindead art-hating faggots

Hey, does anyone here have the infographic showing
1. There's a tranny cosplayer Ashley's remodeled after in ME3
2. David Gaidar liked and commented on the posts of said guy on twitter.

Same thing happened with the sorceress in Dragon Age who was remodeled.

Way back when ME3 was coming out it was posted all the time so I never saved it but I haven't seen it since. When you saw the in-game model side-by-side with the portrait you could see it was 1:1.

what writer made Kasumi a mudshark?

yeah Kasumi was supposed to be a backstabbing thief but the delay between her decloaking and killing an enemy is so long the player or other squad member usually kills that enemy in the meantime. It's always preferable to have someone out to take hits (like Grunt).
>what writer made (heartbroken very recently widowed) Kasumi a mudshark?
truth be told unironically nobody on the staff even "wanted" to randomly out-of-the-black make Miss Goto a BBC addict. but 99% of female Mass Effect fans prefered romancing Thane and/or Garrus whilst cucking poor Black Kaidfen. So Bioware's hand was forced to make the female DLC shiphand have a "strange crush" on Black Kaiden to try manipulating girl gamer consumers to be more interested in the his optional romance quests that 99.9% of consumers were ignoring completely I suspect. yeah

>There's a tranny cosplayer Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams
I don't care, i'm sure Ashley's parents are very proud of him, who the hell cares?

>low tier
she's okay. Area overload is an okay power, especially against the Geth. also equipping any ME2 squaidie with an M-9 Tempest SMG always means bretty gud dps
>Genophage was wisely left uncured
Stopped reading here.
Zero chance BioWare would have the balls to do this.
What thread on a shit game will you bump next?
except they'd have to make 9000 Krogan every NPCs for every 1 regular NPC. Well over 99% of combat encounters in ME4 would exclusively be Krogan
>"After a bit of digging, I discovered this Turian worked briefly for Dr.Scaelon, a black geneticist. So I went to his lab, hoping to find evidence of cloned organ development. But there was nothing! No Turian livers, no Salarian hearts, not one Krogan testicle."
>"You're kidding right? Why would any Asari be attracted to Krogan testicles?"
>"What? We aren't talking about Asari, Commander. We're discussing an escaped convict I've been trying to track down, the Salarian black market organ thief, remember?"
>"Idgaf about your dumb side missions, Garrus! Tell me about Krogan Testicles. Do Asari really date Krogan?"
>"Well, it is certainly not unheard of for Asari to date Krogan, bu.."
>"What the hell, how? Thats disgusting! Theyll have sex with anything! Why? Jesus!"
>"Commander.. I.."
>"Do we think T'soni is even loyal to me? Or is she a spy for the Asari government? What if she's pissed I killed her mom? How do I know she isn't cheating on me with Urdnot Wrex, or wants to? Ew!"
>"No, not all! In fact I'd say she is the most loyal Asari I have ever met, Commander!"
>"Well I dont care Im playing this one Renegade. I cant just fire Wrex, it'd be an insult to a Krogan of his powerlevel. I dont want to look like a cloaca here, I'll try to find some opportunity to get Wrex killed on a space mission on purpose next time I get a chance.."
>"Excuse me, sir? Are you drunk, Shepard?"
>"You still don't get it, do you, Turian? You're NOT in command of this operation! I am! I'll make the hard choices and live with the consequences! You're just here to follow orders, Garrus! Remember that, bird brain!"
>"Yes sir!"
>"I want to talk about something else!"
>"Yes sir?"
>"You mentioned a dangerous Salarian criminal named Hart lives in a ship named MSV Fedele in the Herschel system?"
>"No, I didn't say that yet, but.."
>"Bullshit! Why does my space journal say you already said such, fool? Come, Garrus let's go disintegrate your wicked lizard!"
>"Aye aye! Excellent, Commander!"
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>brutally moggs trAshley in military gurl role
>military gurl
Jack's motto is literally "FUCK THE MILITARY!!!" iirc. She only joined up with The Systems Alliance in ME3 because the only thing she hates more than the military is going down without a fight, and she stood zero chance against The Rapers by herself alone. Meanwhile Ashley Williams always obsessed over following in her forefathers' footsteps ever since she was a 2 year old loli she fondly dreamed of wanting to be a soldier guarding nuke in a foxhole defending earthborns from Turians and robots and Turian-robots and etc in the name of Space Jesus and shit. Her father was millitary, his father was military, and his father was military, all the way back 1,000 generations probably. Ashley is the true military jarhead follower
>"Im offering to be your friendo.. You DONT want to be muh enemy!"
>"I'd take his offer, honey. Otherwise things end badly for you. Fast!"
>"Yes! This ship is going down in flames! Ive got the only way out! And you're arguing, retard!"
>"We could just knock her out and take her Sir?"
>"It might just come to that!"
>"We'll bang, Jack."
>"Wha...sure? SHEPARD I was talking secret Cerberus Data fil.."
>"No, screw your files. Jack you're crazy, you don't know what you need. I know all you need is the hardest fuck you've ever had! I can fix you, Jack! Join my team and I'll bang you."
>"Yes! But... what about muh data files...?"
>"Jack your only real problem is you've never been banged by a pure chad before, just by vermin beta males larping posing as men. I'm literally N7, an obnoxiously OP superhuman tier Cyborg whose very existence violates nearly every genetics upgrade + cybernetics upgrade law in Citadel Space, I am the fucking first human SPECTRE! Forget about files, learn to let go Jack. I have enough side missions to deal with as is. But I can bang you harder than any organic being can possibly ever imagine! Miranda here actually has to watch/report "everything" I do on my ship under The Illusive Man's orders, if you catch my drift, Jack?
>"Shepard! Wait, I..? Jesus Christ Idk! My head is SOO FUCKED UP right now man!"
>"I'm offering to let you cuck my cheerleader instead of your faggot ass files, Jack! You need this!"
>"NO SHEPARD you are NOT authorized to cuck Cerberus Agents!! Understood..?"
>'Oh? It upsets the cheerleader bitch? OKAY!"
>"Trust me, Jack."
>"You better be straight up with me!"
>"We'll bang okay?"
>"So why the hell are we still standing here?"
>"Move out!"
>"Fuck yeah!"
>full paragon
>destroy ending
also femshep should have been sexy musclegirls with big tits, like all female characters
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>"Of course not! Why would I?"
>"Dont play me, Shepard! Allow me to reintroduce myself! Parasini, Noveria Internal Affairs (NIA)!"
>"Like I care? Frankly, your self-righteous attitude is pissing me off, lady!"
>"What? But you just said 50 minutes ago how.."
>"Now youre putting words in my mouth?"
>"I just need you to convince Lorik Qui-in to testify against Anoleis before the board! With his evidence, muh planet can become profitable again!"
>"May I ask why not??"
>"If your executive board loses a few billion credits, it's not my problem! I have my own mission!"
>"Yes, yes.. Fate of billions and all that! I couldn't possibly understand how important your work is Sir!"
>"You help my investigation, I'll provide whatever you need! Quid pro quo. A favor for a favor?"
>"I already said no!"
>"WHAT is your problem Shepard?"
>"I'll keep Qui-in's evidence!"
>"I thought you were a Hero, SPECTREs are supposed to stop crime!"
>"You dont get it! I wasn't invited to join to the SPECTREs to resolve your petty white collar crime whoreshit. Yes? I was invited to the to the SPECTREs because I'm god-tier at killing robots, Krogan and/or terrorists! I have zero time for your insignificant diplomacy crap!"
>"Look! If you have ANY love for the law, you'll talk to Qui'in for me! You know where to find me!"
>"Commander, Anoleis is dirty. Maybe we should consider helping her?"
>"Garrus stfu! Do I need to order my Krogan to rip your arms out of their sockets, Giana?"
>"Excuse me? Please repeat all that into the barrel of my shotgun, I was only half-listening."
>"UGGH you know what? I should've known better! The SPECTREs dont care about anything beyond their mission!"
>"Good Lord! Do you want to die, or do you need to die?"
>"NO! Damnit.. I..I humbly apologize, SPECTRE"
>"I should let you go, I need to get back to my space mission! Get lost, Giana."
>"Please just go!"
>"Squad! Move out!"
>we witness God die
>in every ME2 playthrough
inaccurate phrasing. Cyber Shepard only dies if the player gets the bad ending in ME2, otherwise you can import your character into ME3 (if you survive)
facecode? That's a beautiful Shepard
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Fan Theory 1: The Protheans were gentically modifying the primitive Hanar to serve as their enslaved vassal empire of pet fish. This was proceeding as planned, until The fucking Rapers suddenly invaded!

Fan Theory 2: The Protheans were genitically engineering the primitive Asari to be their enslaved vassal empire of sexy breeders and cute concubines. However the project was barely succesful, as the Asari kept giving birth only to Asari instead of Protheans. The Prothean science teams couldn't figure out why that was, so said "Fuck it!" and abandoned the project halfway through

Fan Theory 3: The Protheans were genitically enhancing the primitive Humans to serve as their enslaved vassal empire of the most skilled fighting soldiers in the Galaxy

I'll look for her codes later, if I find them, I'll post them
I usually just went and gave my Shepard an unflattering old person name like Muriel or Geraldine
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This thread reminds of Emily Ortal Fallout schizoid thread.

Miri is perfect to be lezdomed by Jack.
Love asari strippers. And also Mommy Benezia.
He calms down as he gets to grope mommy Benezia.
Liara is a cute. I like her way more than Tali.
Also, not sure why Quarrians didn't just find a new planet to live on, instead of flying around.
Best porn tier sexy femshep is on Deviantart made aby AlienAlly.
I think it's the same anon that had schizo New Vegas thread once, starting with Emily Ortal. And maybe one more schizo thread of him, but I'm not sure.
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>Also, not sure why Quarrians didn't just find a new planet to live on, instead of flying around.
The Citadel Council would not allow it. Unable to drop their petty grudge, anytime the Quarians found an ideal planet, the Council would actively demand they sign the planet rights over to the Elcor and etc

The Quarians kept tried playing fair with the Council which was obviously a miscalculation, those tyrants never exercise honor
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Maybe I should stop posting, or try making my posting style less distinct? It's no secret that there are baseless accusations floating around that I am working for the Geth, and while these rumors are total bullshit, it raises the question of what if they train an AI exclusively off my posts? That could mean a Synthetic Uprising resulting in billions of human deaths overnight.
They could have went for some Terminus systems planet, where the Council would have no authority.
They realised Protheans were all fascist turbochuds with contempt for their races and secretly prayed he would die.
I appreciate you schizoanon, you are little too wordy but you still make me smile.
Q: How many Batarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: Figure out how many dead Batarians you need to stack in order to reach the light socket, then kill idk 1000x that many
Shepard Shepard
fuck ME3 and fuck biowhores and ea
I'll l never get over it
wasn't Andromeda 10 times the atrocity?
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>Level 100 space chud
Very true. The game makes sure to remind you this over 38 times too even

>The other 600 Trillion Prothean bros
>Also all level 100 space chuds
This we don't know actually, because we only have a sample size of one to judge an entire race on. Don't you think its a bit pre-judgmental to just say "DURR HURR all Protheans are Javiks"? This'd be like if you were a Prothean and met only one white human ever, and he's a garbage man, wouldn't it be racist for the Prothean man here to assume all white people are automatically garbage haulers? And say than that same Prothean meets only one black guy, an african american insurance salesman, so he just assumes all black humans automatically sell insurance and do nothing else? Thats racism definetly. But I'm not calling the real Protheans racist, of course I'm not saying they aren't racist either. I've literally only ever met one Prothean, so how the hell am I supposed to ascertain if they were really a racist race or not? If anything I'd be the real racist here for judging the characteristics of an entire race (the Protheans) off of just one man I.E. just off of Javik's attitude problem

Sure why the fuck not? Maybe Commander Shepard Shepard Shepard even!
You've never met a single Roman, but sure as hell know that they were racist supremacists.
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>HerRp duRrp why not just settle on some Terminus shithole planet where the Council has no authority?
>Who doesn't love the Massively-diverse Vorcha population of "scavengers" over-crowding every urban area in every single known Star Cluster within the Terminus Systems?
>ALL the personal liberties, such as the freedom to own, buy and sell slaves throughout the Terminus!
>let us settle Terminus frontiers where Batarian Pirate gangs are very, very likely to kidnap, torture and enslave my wife (violently)!
>Another cool thing about living in the Terminus? The probability that lunatic Batarian terrorist niggers will enslave my cute pre-pubscent daughters is much, much higher than the chances they'll enslave my 10/10 Quarian wife!
>Lets pick new Terminus homeworld! This will be based
>fuck Rannoch!
>Keelah Sel'ai
Why would anybody want to live there? Councilor Valern has a line scolding Udina:

>"Heh! Well, that is because the Turians do not build colonies in the Terminus Systems, ambassador! Checkmate!"

This line is ironic, a lizards congragulating the Turians on being a pansy race of cowards just as the Salarians are. As if cowardliness is something to be proud of? The fact is weak races (Turians Salarians Quarians etc) aren't hardcore enough to survive life in the Terminus Systems. Humanity is. We are the master race

You may be asking "well aren't the Krogan even more powerful than humans?" answer is no! Humanity functions as a unified fighting force dedicated to teamwork. Krogan are obssesed with killing each other, clan warfare. Krogan-on-Krogan crime holds these idiots back more than the genophage, 99% of Krogan homocides are not even commited by aliens, its actually almost always murders carried out by other Krogans! despite them all constantly crying about "muh alien opression racism" bs the Krogan are mostly victims of their own self-destructive culture
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like how all Quarians are chuds? because many of the Quarians sacraficed their own lives to protect the Geth? Right
Batarians would just have their slaves install the lightbulbs since they don't know how to do basic chores on their own
No? Dude come on she's a cyborg ffs. Femshep in Mass Effect 2 and 3 is one of those rare female characters who doesn't even actually need huge muscles to be an arm wrestling Galactic Champion. Because of Mordin and TIM's groundbreaking cybernetics tech it is only natural she can kick the shit out of Krogan, obv it is immersion-shattering to all hell that James Vega can even remotely keep up with her given in sparring as she should be able to put a T-800 Terminator to shame based off of what we witness in ME2 ingame combat, it is fucking downright ridiculous I know it, you know it, Bioware even knows it!

>I appreciate schizoanon
thanks breh. I like getting my dick sucked like that, especially in front of an audience. I'm slacking on posting epic Lores and meta greentexts for the moment as one of my irl squaddie's psychotic wife kidnapped my 2 favorite dogs March 1st and that cunt is still holding them hostage 2 weeks later. so I kinda sit here rather angry pulling my hair out in frustration trying to come up with a peaceful win-win solution for all parties that does not involve bribery, violence or 911 calls. Naturally I prioritize this rescue-mission to my main quest status, whereas any other irl duties (including but not limited to 4chan posting) are temporarily demoted to my side-quest status. entertaining you fools is like a sub-side-quest within a side-mission at this point so sorry my meme game has been off all March my bad ng

>you are a little too wordy
wtf? clarify

>you make me smile
you're very welcome I live to serve
Wrex is king he can fuck whoever he wishes
Javik's a retard, and not even a cute girl. So naturally no one wants to clone him.
>Javik's a retard
No he is not retarded his IQ is actually remarkably high you're just viewing it from a human-centric POV and not considering what Prothean culture is actually like because of your inconsiderate anthropomorphisms

Zaeed Massani is retarded though, but that is a different story.

>not even a cute girl. So naturally no one wants to clone him
Now you're the one starting sound like a retard here. You do realize how easy it is for Salarians to print out genderswapped clones in their labs on Sur'Kesh, right? Hell even Henry Lawson loves making genderswapped clones of himself and he's not even Salarian!

Producing millions of tank-bred cute girl Javiks would pose very little difficulty or problem giben the current levels of Galactic tech
>Cures the genophage
>"As king, my first Holy Decree is no Krogan is allowed to have sex during my reign. Except for me, I'm the only Krogan allowed to breed, ever again. Ok? I feel this is completely fair when viewed from a traditional conservative Krogan political POV, given how I am the most powerful Krogan so you weaklings hold no right to claim you deserve to breed! So stfu I deserve ALL the females, you cucks deserve NOTHING!"
>"Grunt, get your OmniTool, whelp! Please film a sextape of me sodomizing your step mom. Hahaha!"
>I deserve ALL the females
Wait they have females?
There was a picture somewhere of the ending slide where the old man says "I had reach, she had flexibility" and the child says "Grandpa, this story sucks." Does anyone have it?
This whole thread reads like chatGPT schizo pasta.
You mean this one?
A-anon-kun you didn't post anything.
Incorrect. Wtf? Your entire post reads like forced full-retard tier memey nonsense attempting to imply cold calculating machines can lay down golden Lore posts at near maximum soul levels so okay I suppose you just sorta forgot all of the established facts&Lores here; the Geth do not even have a soul(s)! Period.
Kek AI-anon can create more entertaining posts than bio-anons
no, the other one. thanks in advance asshole
no data available?
>Thing built in woman have soul
>Thing built in factory not have soul
Clearly the solution to true AI is to push the CPUs out of a vagina first
>Synthetic vagina
>also Soul
Based. EDI would be a wiser choice than a Geth platform for these type of functions, she clearly seems far more geared to be superior at taking Massive cock as opposed to lesser AI races... like Legion, the Collectors or the ME1 Citadel terrorist schizoid AI or etc. I don't get why EDI wasn't a romance choice, wtf if I'm RPing a Renegade Shepard and I feel like cucking Seth Green why can't I do that? So what if Joker is muhh best pilot in The Galaxy, he still has to remember he is not in Command of this operation. I am! So if I say so nobody on my Star Ship is allowed to have sex (with the exception of myself) thats just how it is. I run this shit military I.E. no sex drugs and gambling for underling shiphands, thats my privilege exclusive to the Commanding officer alone. I mean sure at least the game lets me tell Flight Lieutenant Jeff Moreau:

>"NO Joker, you are not allowed to have sex with my ship's AI. Damn! Just do your damn job and shut the fuck up, nerd."
>"Sigh... Yes sir."

Sadly Cyber-Shepard can not take it one step further "make babies" with EDI's robotic farthole just to really rub it in Joker's crippled face who truly owns the Normandy SR-2 both sexually and literally for True Renegade RPs
This. They are saying his first name.
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Shep Shepard could work too
>Character is named Shepard
>Spends the entire first game trying to convince the sheeple council of the murderdeathdevilgods coming
>Spends the second game herding an entire crew of idiots to go and graze on the Collectors' lawn
>Spends the third game getting fucked by Kai Leng, who is probably from Wales and not even Japanese (Welshmen love sheep anus)
Was Bioware secretly genius all along?
>200+ IQ geniuses
no actually the highest IQ of any Bioware employee during the production of the Mass Effect trilogy is estimated to be well below 140 so it'd be a stretch to call them secretly "genius" but than again lots of people irl call me a genius and are fucking shocked to hear my IQ is only 120 as if they were expecting me to have a Normandy-nigger and/or a Salarian-nigger tier IQ deviation or whatever just because I look cool and invest heavily in high speechcraft. I'd call oldschool Bioware clever but not exactly genius . .
Please keep the roleplaying in-game.
>"Excuse me, Commander Shepard? Can I have a moment of your time?"
>"No sir, go away"
>"But Shepard! Please sir! The Alliance has taken my wife's corpse hostage! And I need yo.."
>"NO! I don't do side-quests for aliens, freak! Get lost or I'll command my squad to open fire on you, Samesh!"
>"I... oh my. Goodness gracious me! I apologize sir! I must go!"
Any mods to punch this guy in the face like you punch the reporter Khalisah Bint Sinan al-Jilani? I feel like punching her is a solid way to get most of The Galaxy on Shepard's side politically, it'd be like irl if CNN's Greta Van Susteren was interviewing some elite secret agent guy, and in that same interview he gets sick of her dishonorable slander so punches all of Greta's teeth out and calls her an sellout whore. Most of the Galaxy would consider this double or even triple based except for faggot races like the Hanar

>cease all RP immediately!
Nice dubs. but. No can do chief, plus I'm not quite sure what you mean by that. Part of why I'm so successful at my personal life is because I typically approach irl as if it were an RPG. People even go so far as to ask me why I seem to be act like an RPG character personified some days so I can't just cease my RPG lifestyle no
Yes. Beautiful stunning brave Krogan women subject to evil alien oppression it is tragic, racist and fucking viciously deplorable. Real men bang exclusively Krogan babes because Asari are a bit... squishy, like you can't get a decent grip during sexy intimacy at all even it is just awful iirc

Why bang blueberries when there are plenty of yummy big black nigger Krogan women available on the Galactic dating scene too? Asari beauty standards are actually just fake manufactured social constructs my science team has research proving Krogan women are far prettier but the Asarifu Councillor does not want the Galaxy knowing this top secret data I'd imagine
They don't mention your first name because you are "Commander Shepard". You are a commanded. It is just out of respect.

You lack respect. It is like when the Japanese call you by "your surname-san". It is just a matter of respect, lmao. Makes perfect sense in universe.
>be born as a shrimp-dick Japanese guy
>next you slave your ass off climbing the Oriental meritocracy for your entire lifespan doing a 90+ hour work week without a single break or vacation
>next as your "reward" you're forced to sacrafice your own literal goddamn name because of muh honors
Yikes. I should go
yeah it looks that way
some shitposter pasting gpt prompts
Can't believe we missed "German Shepard".
Happy Good Friday shipmates!

No you're wrong you newfag lorelet retard. AI such as chatGeyPeeT or whatever can not even draw hands properly half the time, much less grasp the Lores. Only I really know what is up with the Lores, when you have Lore questions literally nobody knows to answer to ALL oldfags know you don't ask reddit or some shitty AI no your only choice for real Lore answers actually is you go on the extranet keywords 4chan and ask me posting questions hoping I'll find and answer them eventually. Maybe I will maybe I won't? But nobody else actually knows the real Lores except me breh, especially not your neutered AI toys or 99% of idiotic biodrone consumers

This presents a personal problem for me, if I am 4chan's top ME Lore expert, who the fuck am I supposed to turn to for my own Lore questions? I can't just ask the top schizoanon "Hey howcome according to my ME2 Planet Scans the Normandy computer lists Earth's rotation period as 23.9 hours instead of 24.0 hours? Wtf why is the Earth spin speeding up in the future? Shouldn't it be slowing down?" if I am the top schizoanon I.E. i can only answer all of your amateur Lore queries but not all of my own elite level Lore queries it seems

Should I just ask an AI? Shit

OH shoot nigerian here you go champ pic related. Actually it pisses me off the ingame codex mentions genetic uplifting of earth animals but we never witness any ingame. We just read about it happening offscreen. Owning space fish is based I guess, but wtf is with a gay space hamster? I'd much rather own a space dog! If i were the actual Commander Shepard I'd make Dr.Mordin Solus and EDI devote at least 80% of their time researching how to make my space dog Immortal, ship&squad upgrades and shit be damned!
Is a Jew Shepard RP possible given gameplay limitations? Idk. Sorta like how the ME trilogy forces Femshep to be a lesbian, try as hard as you will to RP she's straight as can be, Samara will still grovel/beg Femshep to seduce her 10 PER daughter who spent centuries OCDing autistically leveling up her gaydar, so if Femshep did remotely not desire to bang her at all wouldn't Morinth instantly sniff out how straight Femshep is (pheromones)? In similar fashion, its barely concievable to roll a Jewish Shepard because no matter how you to RP your ME toon, Jennifer Hale and based Mark Meer seem to oddly voice all their lines as if they actively despise Volus (space Jews) for literally no reason at all regardless of if you pick neutral, paragon or renegade dialogue dialogue. Have you ever tried RPing a pro-semite (Vol clan) Shepard bc its actually almost impossible to do that thanks to gameplay restrictions. I mean youre welcome to try, but Im pretty sure a Jewish Commander Shepard RP is just not possible. What if Nazara, Saren Arterius, the Collectors, 10,000+ HUGE Krogan Poop Pack Merc Niggers, The Shadow Nigger, Batarian slavers, 6,000,000+ Geth platforms all decided to team up just suddenly invade the Citadel on Saturday? Uh oh

>"Shit! DAMN! Well tough luck Hackett, my bad, but you know me and my ship are grounded until Sunday. I'm sorry Steve. I mean my hands are tied here sir, obviously I can't break kosher yada yada. Guess you guys will just have to handle this enemy joint-invasion force on your own without SPECTRE Intervention, Admiral"
>"Damnit Shepard, the fate of the fucking Galaxy is at stake here&now and you're claiming moral highground by preaching your ancient Earth religious nonsense garbage at me? What the hell? We'll discuss this bs tommorrow, Commander. Total kike death. 5th Fleet out, sir!"

Can SPECTREs be Jewish? Seems like 1,000s of conflict-of-interst situations might quickly crop up between the Citadel Council and a Jewish SPECTRE right?
Default name for Shepard is John, which is also Jack.
Whoa which lines ingame refer to the Commander as John and Jack? Somehow I missed them I guess.
The game has John as the default choice. Nobody calls him by his first name because it'd be stupid difficult to allow for that, and he's in the military, which means [Last Name] or [Rank] [Last Name].
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This doesn't really apply to Jeff Moreau, Kaiden Alenko, Rupert, James or Jacob Taylor etc.

You just said his name was Jack. Now its John? He has 2 canon names? Yet Commander Jackass Shepard is far more appropriate for Renegade runs than just Jack, so why wasn't that her canon name instead?
Sir, Shepard is male.
Also, samefagging because I just responded to that abomination in your picrel. Jack is an alternate name for John. That's why people refer to JFK as Jack Kennedy. It's also a major point of The Importance of Being Earnest, where John Worthing is Uncle Jack to Cecily.
g*th don't have souls anyway
I suppose Lieutenant Taylor is in for one BIG beefy surprise once he finally finds the prize
Another smart way to name a Shepard? You pick a racial slur for whichever nationality you roleplay. Like Kraut Shepard for German rps or Banzai Shepard for Jap Shep rps. For me I'm not too fond Italians irl, so if I were to ever roll a Italian Shep I'd probably name my Commander something like:

>Commander Meatballs Shepard
>Commander Goomba Shepard
>Commander Donnie Boy Shepard
>Commander Super Mario Shepard
>Commander Koopa Troopa Shepard
>Commander Bunga Bunga Shepard
>Commander Koopa ParaTroopa Shepard
>Commander Big Guy Shepard
>Commander Gay Bowser Shepard
>Commander Benito Mussolini Shepard
>Commander King Koopa Shepard
>Commander Greaser Shepard
>Commander Spiny Shepard
>Commander Hammer Bro Shepard
>Commander Greedo Shepard
>Commander Peachie Princess Shepard
>Commander Luigi Shepard
>Commander Wario Shepard
>Commander Naples Shepard
>Commander Piranha Plant Shepard
>Commander Peenie Peninio Shepard
>Commander Cheep Cheep Shepard
>Commander Pizza Pasta Shepard
>Commander Bullet Bill Shepard
>Commander Commie Shepard
>Commander Blooper Shepard
>Commander Tomato Shepard
>Commander Buzzy Beetle Shepard
>Commander Mama Mia Shepard
>Commander Toad Shepard
>Commander Toadstool Shepard
>Commander Fatso
>Commander Columbus Shepard
>Commander Papa Shepard
>Commander Lakitu Shepard
>Commander Italian Stallion Shepard
>Commander Opposite Oswaldo Shepard
>Commander Penis Parker Shepard

These are some derrogartory terms I use to describe and/or to troll Italian peoples irl but the point is all of these names work perfect for an Italian Shepard roleplay actually too. If you were The Joker would you feel reluctant to call your nutty Ruthless Colonist Renegade boss "Chef Boyardee"? Or would you feel more comfortable just calling him Commander or Sir maybe? Just pick any hilarious racial slur for whichever nationality your Shepard is supposed to be, name the Commander that if you can't think of good names for your guy
Typo, I meant to type Commander Fatso Shepard in the greentext. Not to type Commander Fatso. However this blunder alone pretty proves the idiots ITT wrong claiming I'm not an organic being. AI bots such as ChatGethPT do not make mistakes like typos, but as I'm in fact a non-robot I'm actually prone to mistakes like typos from time-to-time my bad
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>Be Cyber-Shepard
>Recruit an Asari
>Kill your pet Asari to replace her with her younger, cuter, hornier daughter
>Your new Asari asks if she can rape you
>Agree to be her mind rape victim
I have a good idea of precisely how based Asari mind sex feels. I have no clue what banging Morinth feels like, she ensures Shepard that all of her rape victims died experiancing euphoria beyond our wildest dreams. Banging Morinth likely feels 20 times as awesome as banging her mother, problem is she will fuck you to death of course

Lorewise Samara is stronger than Morinth, for all Morinths preaching of how much she hates cowards, she is ultimately a hypocrite, as she was the real coward all along living in fear of her mother's superior power level. However that being said, the heavy Lore implication is everytime Mornith rapes a victim to death her own powerlevel grows substantially. And the more based her rape victim was, the more her power grows! If Morinth did hypothetically rape Commander Jewbacca Shepard to death while Samara was still alive, Morinth would no longer need to flee from all of her battles with her mother like a coward anymore, since she'd suddenly be more than twice as strong as Samara is after consuming Shepards soul

From Shepard's meta POV, its debatable if Samara has the most important loyalty mission in ME2 in terms of overall Galactic significance. Shepard would be aware Legions heretic Geth will rapidly murder millions, but 99.9% of the victims will be of the NPC normies of our Galaxy. Meanwhile Shepards aware Morinth will slowly murder thousands, but 100% of her victims will be remarkably based indiviuals. Morinth is a serial killer who exclusively targets only the most absolue elite based niggers the Galaxy has to offer, but she never kills normies except in self-defense type situations and such. So ask yourself, SPECTRE. which is the greater of 2 evils? Millions of cringe sapients dying out? Or thousands of important sapients dying out?
>hipsters who listen to bands youve never heard of are important
No niggerfool, Morinth never intended to bang the Expel 10 hipsterfag that Shepard threatens. That guy, Vij, was the cuck and Verf (pic related) was the bull. Morinth intended to take both of them back to her apartment so she can fucking rape Verf while Vij sits and watches this all casually internally seething about being an incel because Omega Lore is just a downright heckin shitshow of scum, villainy blood and humiliation dude
Daily reminder that the shadow broker was meant to be some ancient vi from a long lost cycle. It survived because the reapers only exterminate organics. It would have had information on the reapers from thousands of cycles ago that would have been key to the overall plot of the trilogy. Instead they created some alien modeled essentially off of the ogres in dragon age origins to give you a boss fight at the end of a dlc.
>"Hey, do you know where to get to get tickets for a band named Expel 10?"
>"Is this a joke?"
>"Huh? If you score some tickets I can pay creds f..!"
>"Stop speaking to me in that cucked tone unless you want to die in 5 seconds!"
>"I apologize!!"
>"Im ready to punch someone and you're too close!"
>"Relax, relax! It's cool, I'll step off"
>"Why the hell are you staring at me like that? Are you fucking hitting on me, creep?
>"NO! Youre capable woman with a very strong powerlevel and, I mean, uh, I didn't mean to make you mad!"
>"I'm a former SPECTRE you stupid fucking mongo! Im legally allowed to kill you if you so much as offend me, which you're doing right now!"
>"No please don't kill me!! I'm begging you!!"
>"Hell, this is Omega, I forgot! Murder is legal here either way. So I don't even need my SPECTRE loicense to kill you today, right Vij?"
>"WAIT DON'T! Wha.. wait, how do you know my name?"
>"Sit the fuck down and stfu coward! Youre really pissing me off! I dont appreciate low quality male sissies like you hitting on me! Im the 1st Human SPECRE so I deserve better than this crap! Dont you dare dream about what my vaginafarts smell like or how my sweat tastes! IS THAT CLEAR?"
>"Y..yes! I'm sorry I was out of line master"
>"Where do I get free Halix anyway? I came here to get drunk and get laid. By laid, I mean sex with men such as ancient level 100 Krogan Battlemasters! Not sex with spineless pathetic cucked faggot boys like you, but if you're lucky I'll let you watch, fag"
>"Well, Verfs over there by the bar, he has the biggest quad on Omega by a lightyear. I.. I can introduce you to him if you wish..?"
>"I changed my mind! I feel like banging females tonight instead now. Whos the most hardcore dirtiest Asari analwhore who ca..?"
>"Hi! My names Morinth! I've been watching you! You're the most interesting person in this place!"
>"I've got a booth over here in the shadows!! Why don't you come join mee??"
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I have a based idea for a Lore friendly ME LE mod I'll post rn. a romance mod... but hear me out. The mod slightly alters the vanilla Morinth romance quest in a way that keeps in tune with pretty much all established ME meta I.E. Shepard bangs Morinth to death in the mod, not the other way around like vanilla! Meaning Commander Fuck Farts Shepard consumes Morinth's literal soul (thus Shepard eats ALL the souls Morinth ever ate too I'd guess? a crude analogy but think LDB eating Miraak's soul after Miraak already previously consumed 10,000 dragon souls kinda?) here so naturally the Commander gets a MASSIVE ingame power boost. buffs can be imported to Mass Effect 3 of course. Some buffs could include:

>888 points to add to Shepards skill tree. So you have 100s of leftover points after maxing everything with Lore implications being the Commander is only wielding about 1% of his true power perhaps?
>Dominate Skill branch unlocked
>Adren Rush Skill branch unlocked (already playing soldier? Adren Rush is upgraded 5 times as powerful!)
>Slam skill branch unlocked
>select 2 bonus powers instead of 1
>60% cooldown on all powers
>120% cooldown on biotic powers. stacks with your 60% reduction obv
>wield all weapon types on any ME2 class!!
>Infinite sprint
>Health regeneration rate on par with Grunt
>+65% HP buff
>Immune to Raper Indoctrination (ALL scenes with the ME3 child CUT. When hit by Harbingers beam ingame, it immediately cuts to the Shepard's infamous "Breathing Scene" provided you have enough WA points. But if you're under 3400 WA points you just get a game over screen too bad! No "best ending" for you!)
>ME3 Flare unlocked
>all ME3 guns add zero carry weight
>start ME3 at max 10,000,000 creds
>start ME3 with numerous tickets to bands you love such as Expel 10 in your cabin. The meta take being band ticket gibs for the Commander from swarms of simps who desperatly wanna bang you
>all paragon/renegade dialogue unlocked
>ME2 Extended fuel cells research option unlocked
another cool mod idea for Terra Firma voting chud RPs is to give Shepard the option to kill Samara and Morinth at her Omega apartment, instead of the game only allowing you to kill one of the Asari. If you're truly roleplaying as the literal single most ultimate Renegade badass in the entire Milky Way Galaxy, why not simply just kill both of the Asari here?
>Tell me another story about how aliens breed!
That's a hell of an action pose.
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Yes of course and this is typical of almost all Asari in our Galaxy rn. Morinth has had over 400 years to practice how to pose sexy in combat situations. And Samara has had over 700 years to practice mastering her sexy combat poses too. It's just their culture they obviously value the importance of looking good and waste centuries studying their craft
Well the Lair of The Shadow Broker DLC was the ME2 variant of the Citadel DLC. It was a light-hearted half-serious joke DLC

>You thought the Shadow Broker was a shady coporate board consisting of 13 rogue Volus males and 3 Salarian females, right? Well prepare to be subverted. He's just one 8-eyed space chad, THE most chad man to ever set foot in space, with higher INT than Mordin and higher STR than Grunt! ARE YOU FANS ALL HYPED FOR THE MARY SUE WHO PUTS ALL OTHER MARY SUES TO SHAME?? BEHOLD THE SHADOW NIGGER BOSS FIGHT AWW YEAHH BABY!!

The DLC wasn't terrible but it was fucking goofy as hell, at the very least it gave the opprotunity to add more alien species to ME2 Lore so there is that. And I guess it was refreshing to meet a Drell other than Thane and Kolyat in it. ME3 Levithan is probably the worst DLC of the trilogy, I guess EA forced Bioware to make a DLC explaining the Raper's origins because money

Not so sure about that dropped concept that the Rapers don't harm other robots, sounds pretty sus. The Rapers should have been written as mysterious and unknowable as can be. But if you write them so they're completely non-hostile to lesser AI races, it removes a lot of potential for interpretive theory-based fan discussion along the lines of:

>"Are the Rapers perhaps only murdering all advanced life in the Milky Way once every 50,000 years because they're worried we may one day pose a threat to them otherwise if they allow us to grow too much? Interesting but we'll likely never know for sure..."
>Verf = Space Mike Tyson
>Vij = Space Napolean Dynamite
>Donavan Hock = Space Donald Trump
>Vido Santiago = Space Jeff Bezos
>Captain Anderson = Space Obama
>Kai Leng = Space Kim Jung Un
>Khalisah al-Jilani = Space Greta Van Susteren
>Charles Saracino = Space Samuel Hyde
>Emily Wong = Space Olivia Munn
>Navigator Presley = Space J K Simmons
>Aria T'loak = Space Hillary Clinton
>Diana Allers = Space Jessica Chobot
>Classic ME2 Kelly Chambers = Space Emma Stone
>Legendary ME2 Kelly Chambers = Space Lena Dunham
>Javik = Space Adolf Hitler
>The Joker = Space Seth Green
>Jack = Space Sasha Grey
>Barla Von = Space Klaus Schwab (WEF mascot)
>TIM = Space Martin Sheen
>Din Korlak = Space Benjamin Netanyahu
>Calyn = Space Joe Biden
>Sha'ira = Space Belle Delphine combined with Space Oprah Winfrey
>Zaeed Massani = Space Jason Statham
>Rupert Gardner = Space Don Imus
>Garm = Space Osama
>Unnamed Shaman = Space Lucifer
>Legion: Space ChatGPT 7
>Giana Parisini = Space Pam Grier
>Shadow Broker = Space Alex Jones
>Pitne For = Space Sam Bankman Fried
>Samesh Bhatia = Space Ghandi
>Jenkins = Space Jake Gyllenhall
>Keiji Okuda = Space Jackie Chan?
>Captain Matsuo = Space Lucy Liu
>Black Kaiden = Space Will Smith (but before he became a global embarrasment, so thinking like suave lovable 1995 Will Smith here)
>Regular Kaiden = Space Keanu Reeves
>3rd Kaiden = idk lol
>Helena Blake = Space Ghislaine Maxwell
>Henry Lawson = Space Elon Musk
>Mordin: Space Anthony Fauci (the doctor who murdered millions) combined with Space Clint Eastwood
>Harkin: Space Harrison Ford
>Commander Bailey: Space Alec Baldwin
>Detective Vakarian = Space Batman
>Elias Kelham = Space Rudy Guliani
>Batarian Hegemony = Space Islam
>Vol clan = Space Judaism
>Joram Talid = Space Al Sharpton
>Conrad Verner = Space Kevin Smith

Anyone else feel these exact vibes from all of these characters? Some line up more accurately with their irl counterparts better than others listed but all seem similar enough. Did I miss any?
One other thing I find oddly amusing about the Shadow Nigger DLC is how he will ridicule Urdnot Grunt, Tali Zorah, Zaeed Massani, Black Kaiden, Operative Lawson, Kasumi g0t0, Professor Solus, Samara, Morinth, Detective Vakarian and Jack should you bring them into the boss fight, laughing at them dismissing them all as incompetent weaklings. On the other hand, should you bring Thane Krios into that fight, Space Alex Jones feels directly threatened so will instead tell Commander Shepard:

>"You travel with fascinating companions, doctor. It was an incredibly high IQ move for you to bring an elite assassin along with you on this mission, I'll give you that much.."
>playing ME1
>scouting out the Citadel Presidium while trying to expose Saren Arterius as a rogue SPECTRE traitor
>encounter Din Korlack in the Embassies
>I am genuinely interested in learning more about his alien race so try to politely ask him a few questions
>Din appears to be perhaps the most belligerent, crankiest, rudest NPC in the trilogy
>Din oddly constantly tries to monopolize our conversation into openly accusing Commander Shepard of Space Anti-semitism at least half a dozen times (despite Shepard seemingly holding no previous prejudice against Volus at this point, since Ambassador Korlack can be the first Volus the player ever even meets depending on player choice)
>When Commander Osama Shepard asks him about Volus Culture, Din replies first by saying verbatim """We are tribal by nature.""" then Din proceeds to elaborate to you extensively about how they are essentially a minmaxed pure merchant race
I sometimes wonder what oldschool Bioware meant by this!
And what is your name, Mr.Samurai? Do you honored nips even have names? Because you are not even granted the basic God given essential honor of being dignified with possessing indiviual names as I have heard it told. So yeah, nevermind forget I even asked anonsan, and enjoy not even having a name okay?
OP here again. Let me pose a non-rhetorical question any blessed mod creators lurking tonight, perhaps it'll even birth productive discussion. Given how quickly AI voice splicing tech appears to be growing nowadays, is it within the realm of possibility that there will be releases of Mass Effect LE mods that allow ingame NPCs to adress Shepard by whatever the player picks as his or her first name in 5 years? Or 10 years? Ideally the mod would be designed so NPCs usually refer to you as either "Commander" or as "Shepard", but also occasionally refering to you as "Selected First Name" every here and there once in awhile, as that would be most fitting in terms of achieving maximum meta. I'm curious to know what you AI nerds think, thanks in advanced if any keen insightful replies

t. Love modding game, but never bothered inventing my own mods. Like sometimes people ask me irl: "Bro howcome my game bugs the fuck out if I install over 50 mods on muh Toddslop RPG? Wtf, thats bs! Can you patiently explain to me your mastery of the Dark Art of having over 50 million mods installed in your load order with next-to-no compatiblity glitches?"
Maybe. But. Depending on how you define soul, many organics in the 2180s Milky Way Galaxy don't have souls either. Around half of them didn't even know Commander Moobonga Shepard was KIA in the Amada system, blindly believing everything the news vids propaganda tell them to think. So sort of like the Mass Effect equivilant of irl soulless NPCs who believe Jeffrey Epstein killed himself. You don't meet any ingame, but its certainly implied the Galaxy in 2184 was flooded with weak minded fools who would point and laugh at you and dismiss you as "muhh schizo tinfoil conspiritard" if you tried to say that yes:

>"No, Karen, Commander Moobonga Shepard has been dead for over a month. Stop blindly beliving everything you hear in the vids, you witless propaganda-consuming vermin!"
>"Bwahahahaaha!!! Oh, wait, you're serious? Hang on, let me laugh even harder. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HOLY SHIT MY SIDES!! Dude, you're so retarded that it cracks me up. I literally know for a fact that Commander Moobonga Shepard is still alive. The vids told me so!! Checkmate! Wake up, soulless spacer!"
>"I don't have time for your bimbo crap. I should go."
>"HAH so you're mad that I won the arguement, and all of the sudden you have a transport to catch? Well okay than, you can go!"
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A serial killer with no combat experience and underdeveloped biotic skills.
A biotic goddess with continuous combat experience of several centuries who single-handedly kills experienced biotics in droves.
Who is also sexy as hell with her cold aura of indifference. And she swore an oath to the captain personally.

Lore-wise, should Shepard really think twice, lol?
It's like trading a professional soldier for a 12-year-old kid from the ghetto who held a gun for the first time last week.
>"Yes. And your homeworld, date of birth, and full name sir?"
>"Mindoir, April 11th 2155. My name's Shepard."
>"Whoa! THAT Shepard? Wow. But... Really? Commander Shepard?? But we thought you died?"
>"Yeah, I did die actually. But I got better."
>"Holy crap, based! Me and my little sisters are all huge fans you know! Thank you soo much for saving the Galaxy from Saren!!"
>"You're welcome Stacy, I try to look at it all as just another form of duty."
>"Hey uh, idk if this is imposing, Commander, but would you mind autographing my boobies? My little sisters would be soo jealous, I could lord this over them all for an eternity!!"
>"Look I'm kind of in a hurry here. Is all this space paperwork really required? Because I need to get back to my mission."
>"Oh, okay sure. Don't worry about it sir. We can skip the legal formalities if you currently have some Batarians to murder for the sake of maintaining Galactic peace right now, Commander."
>"I do. I should go."

>underdeveloped biotic skills
Wut? Morinth had stronger biotic powerlevels than the oter half million or so Asari living on Omega, not really the worst Asari one could recruit from that sector for a suicide mission

>No combat experiance
>12-year-old kid from the ghetto who held a gun for the 1st time last week
Also bullshit, these criticisms apply better to ME1 T'soni than Morinth. But with Liara, despite having no actual combat experiance, its Lore friendly to a reasonable extent that Liara's space autism made her obsessed with refining her self-defense skillset for her first lonely century before teaming up with Shepard, on top of the Commander giving all of his squaddies some training tutorial rundown on how his combat squad-commander tactics flow. Morinth is different, she'd get bored take a vacation/expedition dropping blind into dangerous spots like the Krogan DMZ trying to kill as many dinosaurs and Krogans as possible for afew years. She loves fighting and danger, 360 years of solo combat xp
What biotic powerlevels, lol?
She's just a serial killer. When and on whom did she practice? It's not for nothing that she first drives the victim unconscious with drugs, and only then attacks. In addition, the Shadow Broker clearly states that Morinth is obviously not worth even Samara's finger.
Her strength lies in the fact that she is good at powdering people's brains, and not in the fact that she is a good biotic or a soldier.

>Morinth is different, she'd get bored take a vacation/expedition dropping blind into dangerous spots like the Krogan DMZ trying to kill as many dinosaurs and Krogans as possible for afew years. She loves fighting and danger, 360 years of solo combat xp
Cope. She's a serial killer. Not a warrior, not a soldier, and not even a fucking Boy Scout. A serial killer. What the fuck is she going to do on the battlefield, lol?
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>What biotic powerlevels, lol?
Pic related, lol. Also keep in mind Samara was born naturally gifted at combat and biotics (she even tells Shepard she discovered her remarkable talent for combat at a young age, and reveled in it traveling the Galaxy for centuries kicking ass. of course she became 20 times stronger under Justicar training, but the point is she was also born significantly stronger than average Asari too) so it makes sense she stands to inherit her mother's elite combat genes even if she weren't born with space vampire syndrome (like how Benezia was also renowned to be damn powerful, and similarly she birthed autistic but OP Liara). On top of that, Ardat-Yakski (Demon of the Night Wind) are significantly more powerful than regular Asari. Especially if they fuck lots of based people to death (she was so blinded by the powerlevel boost that she could sap from Shepard she didn't even realize it was an obvious trap) bc according to Samara "Each time she feeds, she becomes stronger and smarter". she's pretty powerful, the reason Samara trained so fucking hard to become a Justicar at all was bc she just knew it was her only hope of surpassing her daughter's outrageously unfair inborn powerlevel

>She's a serial killer. Not a warrior
failing to seperate Morinth's sex life from the her combat hobbies? She never stfus about her obsession with traveling to dangerous violent places. Her appartment contains huge swords and an illegally modified M-76 Revenant Assault Rifle (same gun the Shadow Nigger prefers actually, for reference). She mentions she's a huge fan of partaking in underground bloodsport 1v1 deathmatch duels. Morinth loves how much easier for her to raise her powerlevel compared to her mother's excruciating training routine. all she has to do to grow stronger is simply have bang lots of powerful indiviuals. And she's not the type to waste that eternal foutain of "free/easy XP" by forgeting to kicking ass in combat situations
>Pic related, lol.
Everything in this picture suggests that Samara will break Morinth in 5 seconds.
>Each time she feeds, she becomes stronger and smarter
Gosh, it's just a metaphor.
>Her appartment contains huge swords and an illegally modified M-76 Revenant Assault Rifle
These are trophies.
>She mentions she's a huge fan of partaking in underground bloodsport 1v1 deathmatch duels
Lol, no. She likes to WATCH one-on-one fights.
>Morinth loves how much easier for her to raise her powerlevel compared to her mother's excruciating training routine.
Biotics are not quantified. It's not like, "I have 10 biotics and you have 100 biotics." You either have the ability or you don't have it. If you constantly develop it like Samara, you will become a biotic god. If not, the biotic god will tear you apart without batting an eye. I strongly doubt that fucking brains to death develops combat biotics.
Actually, no one ever mentions that Morinth is a great biotic. Only her brain-fucking abilities are mentioned.
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Dead wrong! Besides, even the report Operative Lawson writes to TIM express that Morinth could've hypothetically made a decent member of the Normandy SR-2 team if not for the fact she was a total lone wolf sociopath. And no, not all biotics are created equal, for example Jack was selected by Cerberus scientists as the optimal candidate for the Subject Zero position over hundreds of reject babies because reasons bro
Jack is an ordinary phantom. There are hundreds of humans like her.

>could've hypothetically made a decent member of the Normandy SR-2 team

I don't understand what this argument is about. It is obvious that Samara is much stronger than Morinth in terms of biotic abilities and even more so in all other aspects related to combat skills. Obviously, Morinth has zero reason to be on Shepard's team. Only a complete idiot would let a dangerous sex maniac onto the ship without warning anyone about her, risking the lives of the team and the entire mission as a whole. At the same time sacrificing the strongest member of the team, who swore an oath of allegiance to the captain.

Even the devs themselves understood this, because all the content with her was limited to a few lines and a letter in Mass Effect 3. The players themselves understand this perfectly well, because in ME2, less than one percent of the players chose Morinth.
>could've hypothetically made a decent member of the Normandy SR-2 team
These were Operative Lawson's words to TIM, yes that is how she describes it. You're now going to say something negative about Miranda and expect to survive her reprisal? Good luck
>he's Urdnot Wrex
>as king of all Krogan, he can bang anybody
Can he fuck Femshep if he wishes? What about Tali and Miranda? Somehow I seriously doubt Tali would survive to tell about the ordeal. Idk maybe if I were Wrex I'd probably bang Specialist Traynor the ship's lesbian with the expensive toothbrush collection. Sadly I'd most likely fuck her to death but at least I would also cure her of her LGBT syndrome as I send her to the void with my quad. Of course the Commander will be pretty pissed off if his alien bro fucked his quirky secretary lady to death but too bad, that's war, there can and will be casualties, boo hoo
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It's almost hard to call Ronald Taylor a nigger anymore considering Igear is 50 times as big of a nigger imo
Except they call you "Shepard" with no title even in supposedly casual situations. Even the person you're fucking will only ever call you by your last name. It's weird. Even japs will eventually call you by your first name once you get close enough to them.
I like the idea of the shadow broker being a 'continuously replaced' entity, main issue with the Yaahg broker that we see in the DLC is just that it devolves into a straight up physical boss battle, when the main challenge should've just been figuring out who he is/finding his location. Actually getting to the broker himself should've been the win condition.
imagine being the shadow broker
This. Most Americans are under the impression Japs have no names, they're like Geth, just robots. Legion is the only Geth platform with an actual name yet all of the other Geth fail to view that unique privelege as any sort of honor afaik
Fan Theory: I'd naturally assume for a Star Wars RPG, the literal most possible meta thing you could name your human male character is "Dendo Dakaar" as it just works. But Mass Effect isn't really as Star Wars-like as we think it is, considering Commander Dendo Shepard somehow doesn't quite flow naturally here when viewed in comparison
This rarely happens outside video games
poor retards who didnt served in military. it is required/normal to address other soldiers/superiors/subordinates by last name as first name basis implies fraternization that is frowned in most of NATO military (don't know about eastern militaries)
Why do you become ugly when you don't want to use the "canon" face? Why can't you modify it?
Tali fell off hard after it turned out she was just a white woman with purple skin filter. Quarians should've been more exotic.
> Legion is the only Geth platform with an actual name yet all of the other Geth fail to view that unique privilege as any sort of honor afaik

To be fair, Shepard/EDI were the ones who gave Legion its name, it didn't see the need for it until EDI pointed out that it just makes it easier for organics to address/identify it. As things were, at least before ME3 fucked up the concept of the geths consciousness, Legion was basically just a single body housing a whole bunch of geth programs at once.
Mass Effect 3 multiplayer should be ported to modern consoles
>Legion's consciousness is 1,183 Geth so why would the other Geth care if a human nicknamed it?
billions and billions of Geth programs have been OBSESSED with Commander Shepard for over 2 years. yet when the 1,183 Geth programs that make up Legion's mobile platform were given a title/name by their favorite organic in the entire Galaxy, weren't the other Geth being disrespectful (in human terms?) by not appreciating the honor the Commander bestowed upon those 1,183 Geth Infiltrator programs (the Legion)?

I'm more annoyed Tali has hair suddenly, wtf, its cringe it makes her feel too human, it steals agency from Humanity being the most chad race. One reasons we're superior to aliens is they're all bald. However she's still a wise romance choice, for example I find it sexy as hell how Tali has 2 huge toes instead of 5 little toes, not to mention Quarian female sweat is scientifically speaking simply far superior to Human female sweat, etc

Did you try spending 31 hours in the character creation menu like an average RPG expert?
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Speaking of that, it sucks Krogan dick how we have Massive amounts of Lore about the specifics of Quarian sweat yet we have NO DATA AVAILABLE about how sexy pic related's sweat is! If you spend 488 billion credits meticoulously designing the "perfect" human daughterfu in a dark science lab, what properties would her sweat have? Why do we have zero fucking Lore regarding Opertative Lawsons stinky sweat and braps?
>Be a Krogan (or an Asari, a Vorcha, a Turian, a Drell, a Geth or a Quarian or etc)
>Therefore it makes sense that you are a automatically a seasoned expert in Japanese culture/honorable naming conventions/etc
>"Huh? What do you mean the Krogan aren't weebs who worship the orient like myself...? Wtf is their problem?"
No sweating, no braps.
Why do people hate Jacob? He seems like a decent darkie fella to me.

>Why does everybody hate black Kaiden for no reason at all?
Because he was fucking based as shit. And most Mass Effect fans are unenligtened retards who experiance serious difficulty coping with the simple fact that black people suddenly become 5 times more based in the future during the late 22nd Century space age

>No braps
Holy Christ. Do you not know her Lore? Operative Lawson can choose to fart at any time, as loud or quietly as she chooses to fire them out. Or she can simply hold in all of her farts for over 50 years effortlessly without even straining herself if she wishes. But she can indeed fart over 100 times per minute, but sometimes she just chooses not to. On top of that, she has 100% total control of what her each of her farts will smell like. So she can select if she wants to make her fart smell completely undetectable (even to dogs, Krogans, Vorcha, Varrens etc, however she is unable to mask the odor from her own Perfect nose of course) or have the stinkiest farts in the entire Galaxy that can be detected from over 15 kilometers away. But she can make her smarts smell like literally any concievable odor she fancies such as vanilla, chocolate, cinnamon, the ocean, apples, strawberries, teriyaki chicken, curry, gasoline, lavender, burning wood, rosemary, coffee, timber, the tropics, cleaning chemicals, feces, flowers, etc. Whatever odor she finds best fits the given situation pretty much. Remember that Space Elon Musk spend countless billion credits building the perfect daughterfu, perfection including but not limited to his wife's perfect farting mechanics obviously. in the future the female brap fetish has gone full mainstream, during the 2180s women farting is considered feminine and delicate by the standards of most residents of the Milky Way

>No sweating
Idk. For whatever reason, we have plenty Lore available about Tali's sweat, yet we have no Lore available on Opertive Lawsons sweat
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Considering how Operative Lawson could in-theory break the record for the loudest fart in all of Galactic History at any moment she wishes to, it begs the question of why she just didn't start a Space Onlyfans and make 10 Million credits per month to post videos of her firing out perfect farts 24/7 on the extranets. But she figured being the Galaxy's most talented fartwhore would be a waste of her talents. So when she was very young, she abandoned her aging husband Henry to put her big brain to good use fighting against alien oppression by becoming a terrorist. given how horny her boss is according to the Shadow Nigger's top secret files, it should actually come as very little surprise that yes, TIM likely requested Operative Lawson unleash her strongest foulest super braps directly into his nostrils on quite a few smelly occasions...
Good thing every Krogan in the Galaxy is well-read on human name/title synax and also respectful enough to not insult Shepard by speaking his real name
>I'm putting a team together
>Then disbanding my team and surrendering our ship before ME3
Kind of. Depending how you define female
Please get help before it's too late.
If a thread is 121 days old that means no one actually likes the game. There are no exceptions to this rule.
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>Everybody hates Mass Effect!
>Because I've hated this fucking thread for over 100 days!
You're wrong kiddo, lots of people like this game, literally more than 100 people play it in fact. Didn't you know less than 10% of the Mass Effect threads that wind up posted here are even my threads. Almost like the game sold multiple copies or something

>please help me
Get help with what? Help you learn strategies to cope with being a hopeless Lorelet? Idk have you tried not being a pseud? Do that. See if it helps you, then we'll talk
President Biden owns a German Shepard named Commander. Perhaps he is trying to pander to Mass Effect fans for our votes here?
>Mass Effect 1 Council was killed
Yes it happened let me remind you; 6,000,000 Volus diplomats and 3 Citadel Councilors all died on that terrible day, who the fuck are you to doubt the """Official Numbers""" of the Sovereign's Holocaust? You can go to jail in plenty of civilized star systems for decades for the holy crime of your misinformation shitposting anon you should be more careful we don't want /vrpg/ shut down by the authorities if you catch my drift sir? Just follow the rules ffs
That's because 90% of this thread is one schizo talking to himself.
>270 posts by ITT
Not precisely, I just scanned and did quick calculations to confirm your math is off for you bro. 69% of posts ITT are me and 31% of the problem of this halfdead board was you all along

Yes, and you're very welcome
>"Shepard! I find myself in the uncomfortable position of begging for your help!"
>"Miranda relax, youre like the mom I never had but always needed, whats up?"
>"Remember what I told you about daddy!? Building a dynasty!?"
>"There was another reason I went to Cerberus for protection!"
>"I have a sister! A twin! And daddys still hunting her! Cerberus kept her safe! Until now!"
>"Shes living a normie life on Illium! Safe hidden from daddy!"
>"Why are you sharing the family history?"
>"Daddys agents have been tracking my sister for years! I believe theyve tracked tracked her to Illium!"
>"I see"
>"Ive tried to keep her hidden without impacting her life! Im out of options!"
>"Why are you so bitchy whenever you mention him?"
>"My daddy was extremely wealthy! He wanted the ideal daughterfu! He paid a great deal to genetically tailor me to perfection!!"
>"Not sure I follow?"
>"When I learned that my daddy was more interested in controlling his dynasty than raising a daughter!? I left!"
>"How did your dad take that?"
>"He was less than pleased! 9 of his security guards were killed in the process! He knows not to cum after me! But this isn't about me!"
>"His anger seems understandable"
>"My daddy has given up cuming after me! Hes not retarded! He wont cross TIM!"
>"Can you tell me about your sister? Does she have a cute butt or big tits?"
>"Yes! Shes muh genetic twin!"
>"Hes too close! We have to go to Illium now to ensure she's safe when Cerb.."
>"You know whats at stake on my mission, Miranda! I can't afford delays for your family crap!"
>"Still don't follow? Youre NOT in command of this operation! I am! If you want my help, we bang beforehand, not afterward! Like Goto and Jack did"
>"Ah, I understand, Commander! The mission comes first! ill clear the engine room and be there in 5 minutes!!" *wink*
>"One more thing, when we bang, refer to me only as Henry or Daddy, understood?"
>"GROSS! EWWW! Ugh! So be it! As you wish, daddy!" *wink*
LE Trilogy remake needed more way genocide quests. For example Ronaldo Shepard should have had an optional renegade quest to attempt hunting down and killing literally every Keeper on the Citadel, his logic being (despite whatever unreliable data Vigil sprouted on Illos) they're probably still slaves to the Rapers thus remain a Massive threat to all Humanity here. Maybe Ronaldo is right. Either way the quest ends up being impossible to complete 100% no matter how hard you fight for TKD on the Citadel because every time the Commander kills a Keeper the Citadel immediately births out a newborn Keeper to replace the dead one. Sadly Shepard is forced to give up his crusade upon realizing he is unable to hunt the Keeper race to complete extinction since the Keepers are literally programmed to have a permanent population. He can't keep up. It'd be like trying to gun down every single human being within modern day China rn but with a squad of only 3 elite commandos, you'd never actually succeed at your goal because the bugs breed even faster than you can shoot them to death

Brb gotta go bump my 24 mlp RPG threads now eat shit
Typo. Meant to say "LE Remake should've offered us more in the way of genocide side-quests" iirc

LE should have let us genocide ALL Keepers, Asari, Salarians, Humans, Batarians, Hanar, Drell, Turians etc etc if we choose to. because player freedom does matter
Scott Grimes is a far better voice actor than Seth Green
You've been talking to yourself in this thread since January, aren't you bored yet?
Which one would make a better star pilot though? Both seem somewhat smarter than most actors, which isn't saying much since most actors are naive spoiled clueless retards nowadays. But theoretically I'd say Scott Grimes and Seth Green would make much better star pilots than say Alec Baldwin or John Travolta. I'm still holding out hope that in Mass Effect 4 you find out the Joker is actually a clone of Seth Green. Maybe TIM was a fan of earth 21st Century films, and figured somehow Seth Green has the potential to be the best pilot in the Galaxy. So he digs up Green's DNA and clones him (but intentionally inflicts the clone with vrolik syndrome, ensuring he'll focus solely on flight school instead of getting distracted by any passions for stage acting) and he secretly inserts Jeff into the Tiptree colony, killing Hilary's real brother. Meaning Hilary never was his real sister, Joker never had a sister, because he's a clone of a deceased 21st Century actor. That could fix a few plotholes maybe, idk I mean we all find it weird as hell that the games never have a conversation along the lines of:

>"You know who you remind me of? Seth Green. You probably hear that a lot I'd bet."
>"I do, this marks the 19th time somebody told me this month so far. But thank you, sincerely, for the eternal reminder, Ash."

Just undo the plotholes by confirming he is a literal clone. Except even that begs the question of why it took the Normandy Crew 4 games to figure out the obvious fact

I haven't had the luxury of boredom in over a year, too busy for boredom not to mention redeeming /vrpg/ is only but one of 206 passionate spiritually fullfilling hobbies
That's pretty realistic, because only after enduring a hardship of such incredible magnitude do you finally possess the proper hindsight of how truly badass one must behave in order to end a 300 year war by shouting. Your Shepard wasn't hardened enough until after he failed, then in retrospect he realized what he should have done instead that regretful day upon learning from his mistakes thus growing wiser and more renegade

This kind of crap has been happening to the best of us irl for thousands of years
>The ME schizo is also a mareschizo
You can get in the same ballpark with Warframe, if you can stomach the fact that you'll be playing a starchild psychically piloting an army of Kai Lengs
Of course he could; Wrex and Femshep are both alpha specimens and highly compatible. The real question is: given the Lazarus Project's full documentation, could Mordin transplant a Krogan womb into Femshep to enable the Adam and Eve of a new, superior breed of space cop?
This thread is the most entertaining thing on the entire website, let alone this board, I don't know or care if it's just a guy talking to himself
winners take drugs? Ok so im going to wisely empty all remaining bank accounts asap to stock up 99 death sticks 99 adreanatimes 99 mentats as it looks like the time finally has come to launch the suicide mission tommorrow morning. those chems boost stats and I wont care about money after I beat the final boss. God be with us. consider this; RPG guy or not, no seasoned gamer'd dispute cigarettes are the Solid Snakes (cigars w/ the Big Boss) top 3 tier favorite equipment. if the Big Boss was only allowed 3 equipments with him on operation Snake Eater he'd pick pistol, knife and a box of Cubans. /sci/, /lit/, /fit/ /biz/ /pol/, /vrpg/, /vr/, /v/, /tv/ and /int/ were not wrong when they told you nictotine can raise IQ level if you smoke intellgently whilst running a smart build so go smoke your meds smartass and if youre actually as smart as you claim you are then enlighten me who'd win this fight, Commander Femshep vs Female Darth Revan 3v3? assume she picks any 2 squadies she wishes to pick (her best) and she openly identifies sexually as a horny playersexuals who wants to bang everybody. Which squadmates would she pick? Just picking her absolute fucking highest powerlevel squaddies so Zaeed&Grunt vs Bastilla&Jolee? Grunts a big guy but can he eat Lightsaber blows and Force powers at the same level of success he tanks any&all Mass Effect weaponry? how much time do they have to prepare for the 3v3? Miranda&Mordin could invent worthwhile counter-measures against Jedi tactics in a lab given enough prep time or HK47 could quickly assassinate Commander Meatbags whilst her enraged boyfriend Thane Krios assassinates cute female Darth Revan so 2 unrivaled assassins attempt assasinating the other guy asap whilst Jack&Juhani catfight on their fucking PMS space periods!! Either tell us who would win or consume your meds kid, what if Darth Revan lays down 99 deadly plasma mines right before femshep and her squad show up for battle?

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Does EDI have delicous braps or just regular ones?
EDI is a robot, so her default braps probably smell like ozone and oil. She could probably install a scent pod if you ask, though.
>Revan vs Shep
Depends on if T3-M4 is present. T3 sweeps no matter what by raping EDI, forcing the Normandy crew to mutiny or die via his ATF-erection-inducing cache of illegally modified tesla coils and grenades, and hijacking the Normandy. Probably while smoking a blunt and changing Shep's radio presets. Last thing Femshep hears is 'X GON GIVE IT TO YA' before the Thanix cannons turn her into a cloud of ash formerly known as Femshep.

Otherwise, Bastila costs Revan the victory due to her sheer bitchiness in any squad comp she's a part of. She's a skank, a ho, and a basic bitch with unwarranted self-importance and any Revan willing to tolerate her presence is a Revan not spiritually strong enough to stand against the sheer willpower of Shepard.

In general, I'd put a melee-focused Revan at a disadvantage since mass effect bullets are physical and lightsabers at best simple vaporize them and at worst turn them into molten slag that does more damage than it would've as a piercing attack. Plus, mass effect barriers deflect attacks, so there's a decent chance even if Revan cuts Shepard in half, the shield sensors will detect his lightsaber hilt and knock his lightsaber back into his own face.

Ranged/gadget-focus Revan gains a massive advantage. Mass Effect guns and blasters are, tactically, about the same- guns that have functionally limitless ammo but either overheat or require a battery/heat sink change every so often. We have no reason to assume Star Wars armor wouldn't do anything against mass effect's guns, and the melee shields could probably stop mass effect rounds even if the energy shields are less likely to do so. Mass Effect shields stop fast physical shit and that's it, so no matter what Shepard is going to be counting on her health/armor pool alone if the enemy takes anything other than vibroswords.
Add to that, Shepard gets a pitiful amount of grenades/heavy weapon ammo that must be recharged by rare pickups. Shepard only gets a shitty sentry gun and drone, and only as an engineer.
Compare that to Revan having fucktons of spammable grenades of multiple damage types, independent of Jedi specialist track, on top of also having bullshit chi magic that enables not just gravity control but healing, lightning attacks, and directed REEE attacks. Shepard's only hope against a technically-savvy Revan squad is a stealth attack, but even then there's a significant risk of her massive ovaries constituting a detectable disturbance in the Force.
HK47 tells us the less you plan out an attack on a Jedi, the better. Impulsive improv plans work far more effectively because it serves as a counter for Jedi intuition
I think I kind of get it now, I understand why 90% of the Japanese population love to kill themselves, I mean I'm hardly what you'd call suicidal but I guess I should take back the 5,930 racist things I said about Japanese people this past decade. sorry man

t. currently overwhelmed with massive survivor's guilt
they actually breed surprisingly successfully with an entirely male population, female Krogans are lawfully decapitated at birth because survival of the fittest etc
>137 day old thread
>not anywhere close to bump limit
Guess we can objectively say 4chan hates mass effect
Alright /vrpg/ which of the following did you genocide
The Protheans were already completely genocided when I got there, you can't exactly blame their failure on Shepard Commander
Well depending on how you handle Javik you could make sure the last one is gone forever
>Shepard Commander
Wait a minute
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>I've debunked the existence of Outer Space
>Surely all of 4chan is in unanimous agreement with me, right? Space is gay?
Wrong. I AM THE 4CHAN! Go ahead and just consider yourself debunked nigger. Happy Memorial Day
>Wait what?
I was mocking Legion's autism relax I already said I'm not a bot and I already said I'm not working for the Geth. Right?

>depending on how you handle Javik
I suppose so. He kills himself if you let him activate his memory shard. Interesting part is what would make it more grim is how if renegade Shepard did intentionally suggest Javik activate his shard with the hidden genocidal intention of wanting him to one day kill himself, Javik would be well aware his Commander wants him dead because of his semi-telepathy. Plus you can essentially ensure he goes through with his suicide by refusing to shake his hand in London. One of the most cold blooded renegade things you can do in the trilogy is refuse the paragon interrupt for his handshake. Like even if you're roleplaying a goodboy type Shepard who outright disagrees with every ultra machiavellian af statement Javik says in the whole game, it really is pretty fucked up to still refuse to shake his hand after all you two had been through together fighting the Rapers side-by-side across the stars. I mean If I was Javik and hadn't gained an ounce of my commander's respect throughout the whole game I'd wanna kill myself probably
Also worth noticing how a simple mod to fix ME3 would be to voice splice anytime Javik says "Primitive/Primitives" to instead say "Monkey Nigger/Monkey Niggers" for immersion. Javik is a hardcore chud (like TIM levels of space chud) not some pansy Hanar diplomat plus he is very pissed off his race went extinct so he isn't exactly in a mood to be excessively polite and isn't going to use PC language anymore

>"Dr.Tsoni would never forgive me if I didn't ask you some key questions about Prothean culture"
>"Excuse me? I've spent over 100 years fascinated by your race!"
>"Who cares? We are gone. A dead race. Why do you monkey niggers insist on solving mysteries that no longer matter to anybody?"
>"Wh..what did you call us?"
>"I am in no mood to answer your gay questions!! All of my people are fucking dead!! I wake up 50,000 years later to see you foolish monkey nigger races running my race's galaxy!! Salarians, Krogan, Humans, Asari! UGH! And you monkey niggers wish to interrogate me with pointless questions!? WHY?"
>"I think you need to calm down Javik..."
Hm? They said my name all the time. Malcolm "Colm" Anders Sheppard
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>t. RPG Roleplaying expert
>"Wow. That was quite an entrance"
>"JACOB! Youre out-of-line again! Stfu! Let us adults talk you fucking amateur!"
>"My bad. Apologies, sir"
>"Impressive quadkill, assassin. I came a long way to find you"
>"I apologize. Prayers for the wicked must not be forsaken"
>"I totally understand your frustration. You really think Dantius deserves it?"
>"Not for her. For me. The measure of an indiviual can be difficult to ascertain from actions alone. Take you for instance. All this destruction, chaos! I expected this to be my last job. I was curious to see how far youd go. Well here I am"
>"Howd you know I was coming at all?"
>"I didnt. Not until you marched in the lobby shooting. Nassana was paranoid, believing one of her sisters would soon ice her. You proved a valued distraction"
>"Bastard! You used me so you can kill her!"
>"I needed my distraction. You needed your assassin. Speak"
>"True. Lets cut to the chase. I need you to help me genocide the Collecter race"
>"Attacking the Collectors would require a ship that can pass through the Omega 4 Relay"
>"Lol! They told me it was impossible to get to Illos too! Who is laughing now, Thane?"
>"BwAhaHAHAHhaha a-ack! I kneel Commander, dont make me laugh that hard, reduces my life expectancy. Did your d..dossier forget to mention Im dying of a lung condition? Jokes aside, Im honored to serve you. Youve built a career out of performing the impossible"
>"I have the the best Salarian in the Galaxy, my top guy! He can extend your lifespan!"
>"Solus...? Whatever. Either way Ill be fantastic for the next 12 months"
>"Yo we sure about this nigga Shepard?"
>"Whats your problem Jacob?"
>"I dont like mercenaries! An assassin is just a precise mercanary! Cant relax having an assassin watch your back"
>"Fuck you monkey nigger! Youre fired! DO NOT report back to the Normandy!"
>"Beat it! Youre jealous Thane is more than twice as black as youll ever be, Lieutenant! Your services are no longer required asshole!"
As should the Pineapple Station DLC
Shepard is always in some formal setting, either with officials - where using last names is coutume - or as an authority when you're in the field - where being refered to by your lastname is coutume. And then you get known by that, and suddenly your last name is also your nickname. Doesn't take a high IQ to cope up a reason you dumb fuck
>Geth genocide
How about we forget about the Geth for a second? What of the endless hordes of Vorcha? People here have their quads in a twist paranoid about muh Geth infiltration but why even? as if everybody somehow forgot Vorcha are Satan's chosen people by their own admission? Satanism is the entirety of "Vorcha culture" in a nutshell. I suggest we team up rn to fight as a united Galaxy genociding these evil goblin degenerates once and for all. Punish the evil Vorcha! Decapitate Vorcha with fire-based weaponry. Biotic kick Vorcha into pure titanium. Snipe Vorcha with M-98 Widow X Rifles. Launch Vorcha babies out of your airlocks. Genocide Vorcha vermin. Defecate in Vorcha food caches. Command Vorcha to the escape pods to eject them into the sun. Headshot Vorcha with fully upgraded M-6 Carnifex X pistols. Toss Vorcha into stormy hydrogen-helium gas giants. Infect Vorcha with sterility plagues. Cryo-Freeze Vorcha to absolute zero. Never relax around Vorcha, always carry grenade launchers. Report Vorcha to Captain Gavorn. Send Vorcha refugees to "habitable" planets made of quicksand. Liquefy Vorcha in vats of element zero. Use Vorcha for live ammo training. Cook Vorcha as breakfast for the crew. Dissect Vorcha in the lab. Cut off all Galactic aide. Exterminate Vorcha with illegal bioweapons and class 2 WMDs. Re-direct asteroids to collide into Heshtok. Stomp Vorcha skulls with N7 Armor boots!! Cremate Vorcha in incinerators. Lobotomize Vorcha. Mandatory abortions for Vorcha. Grind Vorcha fetuses in your ships trash compactor. Perform unethical scientific research on Vorcha. Disintigrate Vorcha with your omni-tools. Feed Vorcha to hungry Varren. Broadcast Vorcha executions on public extranet vids. Cut down Vorcha with omni-swords. Deport Vorcha to Venus. Train AI to discriminate against Vorcha. Torture Vorcha with neural shock apps. Annihilate all Vorcha in the Milky Way. Enslave Vorcha. Rape Vorcha females! FUCK optics, optics do not win interstellar wars
Day 144 of samefagging and no one here likes mass effect yet
>bah humbug uugghhh omfg this proves it! After 144 million centuries I still don't get it I remain so obstinate as to ever even consider liking a Mass Effect RPG! Because I just can't, okay?? F'ing curse you OP!
Ftfy chad. Wtf is your angle here exactly?
Skill issue
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What the hell are you talking about. That doesn't sound anything like Cerberus technology. Certainly what you describe does not sound like TIMs tech because EDIs braps would among the most sophisticated, sexy and lifelike in the Galaxy
>Vorcha dissections
>Vorcha-based rations
Vorcah are made of AIDS, and you're just cool with feeding that shit to your men? Nah, here's a plan with some chest hair:
>Feed Vorcha to Batarians
>Rip Volus out of their suits then seal Vorcha in them
>Force Vorcha to breed with Batarians, then get their mutt offspring into debt slavery via high interest payday loans and strategic deployment of liquor stores outside all Vorcha housing developments
>Lure the Reaper harvest fleets exclusively to Vorcha worlds and watch the fleet kill itself after the new one is born
>Give a pack of Vorcha a bunch of 20th century rap tapes and ditch them in Compton. Hilarity ensues when they start singing 'nigga' out loud.
This is bullshit. I eat Vorcha for breakfast, lunch and dinner so naturally I experiance zero health problems. Just because they look fucking revolting while alive doesn't mean that the Vorcha aren't nutritous and delicious after you terminate them. Not to mention it'd serve as decent psychological warfare tactic or whatever being able to order Vorcha soup and Vorcha burgers in most resturants throughout Council Space
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Just genocide the Cresent Nebula or at least the 80 million or so degenate dullstone perverted hedonists populating the Tasale System. Why is it called the Fish-Dog Food Shack? Wtf? You can order dogs in resturants on Illium? That is fucked up! if I was an elite SPECTRE I'd take my two top squadmates to this inhumane establishment BTFO all of employees/customers there (heavy weapons, biotics, etc) every time my mission took me to Illium (Space Taiwan) just to remind those freaks I DONT negotiate with cannibalistic lesbians. The situation grows more tiresome once you start noticing vile alien resturants have never-ending hateful bs """merchandising campaigns""" like pic related as if the Space Taiwanese feel bizarre unnatural urges to constantly advertise how fucking barbaric they are with "I eat puppies!" and "Obliterate Earthborns!" shirts. We get it you aliens are all racist the only thing you idiots even know how to do is hate Humans. A Human SPECTRE stopped the traitor Saren Arterius thats the only reason we speak Galactic ITT instead of communicating with exclusively 1's and 0's yet ungrateful aliens do nothing but flaunt their lack of appreciation for Humanity's sacrafices. Pay Illium the same lack of respect they give us. Their whole culture (can we even associate words like "culture" with this God forsaken NPC hellhole world?) is a primitive competition to always see who can be the most arrogant snob in the room. The Krogan, Samara, Jacob and Vakarian are right to say Illium is The Milky Way's colon. I suggest we wipe it off the Galactic map. They won't do shit iirc theyre sorta positioned between the Asari Republics and the Terminus Systems so pillaging Illium to total extinction levels holds minimal risk of much consequential political blowback for Councillor Udina and his boys. We ALL just know if the Tasale System got consumed by a black hole the Galaxy would drink and sing in celebration so ffs please re-direct an asteroid to their Mass Relay
>Shepard is always formal
>No matter what the situation
Are you even American or do you just go about larping pretending to be a burger online? Idk how you do shit in Bangkok or wherever the hell you hail from but as an actual American I must call bullshit on your absurdoid claims. I find it shatters immersion sometimes like for example if me and Tali Zorah are in the Captain's Quarters chilling after a mission enjoying top-shelf exotic Krogan 300 proof alcohol and watching our space vids while we are eating each other sweaty assholes in this instance I just somehow feel we oughta be on a personal enough level together by this point that she can start adressing by my first fucking name now bc the current situation is a bit informal imo. exact arguement can be repeated about other bangable cuties like Gunnery Chief Williams and Dr.Tsoni and Operative Lawson or even Space Jessica Chobot or the Yeoman etc. Yes Shepard is a pretty big guy but he still has a name. The American President is a big guy too but imagine if I'm Joe Biden rn, I'm 69ing my drunk wife Jill Biden rn, wtf does Jill adress me as while I'm banging her rn? Is Jill Biden under professional obligation in that she must refer to me as "Mr.President" or "Commander-in-Chief" or "Sir" or whatever during sexy times? Perhaps she might just call me Joe when I command her to tongue my presidential anus
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Ironic in a way. what with how all 6 races you mention wish to genocide Humanity
I can't believe that this thread has been kept alive by two jannies for this long
What the hell makes you think I'm a janny all of the sudden and why should I have to stand for your baseless gay accusations, faker? First I'm mislabeled as the Geth now I'm being called some janny nigtard? Thats pure bullshit because I am the most pro freedom of speech bro on this entire website, me becoming a janny to censor anons free speech goes against everything I stand for! Even if they were willing to pay me $2 million per year to be a 4chan janny I'd still politely decline your job offer. Drink your meds clown
Are these schizo jannies in the room with you right now? Or were you the real schizo all along?
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>Become the most famous human in all Galactic history
>God's strongest SPECTRE
>nobody in the Galaxy even knows your real name
>"YOU! Come here, HUMAN! Let me now indulge you at great length with MUH scholarly expertise regarding the pathetic failures of YOUR homeworld's newest hero!"
>"Oh really now? Can you pronounce his first name in proper English?"
>"well, no. I can not.. I... must go. R..right??"
>"Yes. Get lost, slaver scum! Go preach to some lesser NPC fuckheads elsewhere!"
>2 humans
>Enough to save the Galaxy
The word youre looking for is 3
Sir, fraternising with xenos is abhorrent, you will be castrated at the next Citadel checkpoint
>2024 AD
>No Paragon SPECTREs have a shred of honor left
>No Renegade SPECTREs have a shred of honor left
The fucking absolute state of the modern Milky Gay is nothing less than humilating. And it will get worse before it gets better
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>"Wait a minute! Shepard, you were only black when the Thorian made you a clone. The real you was white, like normal humans.."
>selfcest inbreeding
I see no problem with that and don't think it is gay at all
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What is the canon class for African American Shepard? Should I replay the trilogy as one and post the meta data?
Lol imagine letting a faggot this retarded become a janny and he just makes threads like this and constantly bumps them on the worst board
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Is this you? I ask non-rhetorically because every time I read your posts I always picture pic related in my head for whatever reason. How old were you when this photo was taken? I get it, you're literally the angriest chess kid from the meme but all grown up thus your autism has doubled since your early life section days. By standard calculations this makes you the current Autism World Champion now. Wow. Can I have your autograph, champ? And why do you think I'm a janny? I hate jannies and I would never disgrace my good name by joining their faction you fucking filthy animal
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>stopped putting fucked up teenagers and/or retard-savants in their games
Well if we're all in agreement Tali is indeed Mission Vao 2.0? I'm going to go ahead and adress the elephant in the room stating why this means Mako is Mission Vao 3.0. The Kotor 3 MMO launched in 2011 (so one year before Disney/Lucas tradeoff I.E. Disney ruining SW games&films forever) and her canon age is technically 18 but you get the feeling Mako is even younger than Mission or Tali ingame by the way ingame characters treat her, obviously Bioware wanted coomer fans to figure she was around 14ish at the start of SWTOR Act 1 but that was too tricky to get away with "officially" in 2011. Like if you browse gaming forums looking up threads about Mako's in-universe age, most gamers are shocked to discover her canon age is 18 saying they assumed Mako was much younger. So hats off to 2011 Bioware on that count

It is debatable if Mako is best bioware waifu or not of course. But you can not debate Mako is the most underrated Bioware waifu. Shes the 1st companion you recruit as BH Class in SWTOR (worth noting SWTOR Bounty Hunter is as close as RPGs ever came to making the player RP as Zaeed Massani) and seems sort of like Mission Vao, except human and except she has a freakish autistic nerdy obsession with Bounty Hunters and BH History and BH Culture etc. Youre a man 30 years older than her, youre the best Bounty Hunter in the Galaxy too. You recruit this youngling nerdy teenager whore obsessed with "pro" Bounty Hunters on 1st planet which gives players sweet horny vibes as if youre a 50 year old Rock Star recruiting 15 year old fangirls to be your sidekick, except in the form of SW RPG. Makos a slicer AND enhanced clone which is sexy as hell but also a elite Cyborg thats a very hot combo! Mako is a geeky savant 200+ superhuman tier IQ her butt is cuter than Miranda/Tali's with good gear. Ive probably fapped to Mako more than any other Bioware girl bc some of us have refined taste I guess
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Heres more Mako on BH's ship D5 Mantis except without her armor on now. she's like space Japanese or something but grew up as an orphan on the smuggler's moon Nar Shadda. You can also turn her into white Mako or black Mako or etc Mako if you wish with some of the 9 companion customizations, and it doesn't even violate SW Lore to do this, so not just strictly a game mechanic. I once rolled an Image Designer toon in best SW RPG (Star Wars Galaxies) so can tell you first hand it is easy to change race within your species in SW Lore. Very easy to change their visual appearance from a meta standpoint, but it is weird how the game never makes the companion characters comment on you altering their race. Wouldn't Torian and Mako express they missed being white and japanese in a ship convo at some point if I used Companion Customization 3 to turn them each black? The game just never have been an MMO at all even from the start, and for the love of God whenever you beat Makeb QUIT PLAYING the main story jumps off a cliff so fucking hard immediately after finishing Makeb. I'd rather be tortured by the Sith than play kotor 3's DLC. The 8 class stories 3 Acts from launch are based all 24 acts are enjoyable but always pretend the game ends after Makeb
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Whoops and here i almost forgot to post her cute teenage space butt for you frens don't worry Mako is perfectly legal (on Hutta)
Do you have friends/a family? I know you're some fag spammer guy who does this on a few boards but I can't remember your name rn. There are periodic threads about you where you brag about ruining 4chan for other people
There are a lot of homosexuals, autogynophiles etc. on this board and/or virgins that might feel threatened by Jack but they are all wrong, she's as hot as the core of Venus.

See my nigga here, he gets it. This is how non-virgins (that have actually fucked women (female)) actually think instead of porn addled homos going on about smells and other nasty shit in order to receive parasocial attention.
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>Do you have friends

>Do you have family

>I know you're some fag
no you're a projecting botbrain faggot

>but I can't remember your name
are you requesting I reveal my real name on 4chan? this site is anonymous the whole point is I work very very hard at keeping off the grid so why would I give a shady weirdo like you my name for you to sell me out to ruthless doxxers at kiwifarms? fuck off gaywad, whats your name? whats your moms maiden name? does your mom have big tits? do you have a sister? whats her number? whats your dogs name? whats your problem you drooling autistic nutcase? monkey didn't have his banana today?

>There are periodic threads about you
huh? Which threads do you mean?

>you brag about ruining 4chan for other people
you blind delusional bat it'd actually be more accurate to say I'm saving 4chan not nuking it

We'll have to disagree on that, sir. Subject Zero clocks in as the least attractive Bioware waifu, cope. she's hideous go run the numbers and I would bet the majority of RPG fans agree because at least 95% of gamers would obviously prefer to bang Kasumi Goto instead of banging Jack if given the opportunity to bang one but not an opportunity to bang both shipmates. For example Kasumi Goto refuses to bang Commander Shepard after Jack gives you space herpes (and numerous other horrific space STDs like scale itch and etc) that way Kasumi Goto at least has some sort of valid Lore reason to not bang Shepard if Shepard bangs Jack
Because ME3 contains no Krogan romances that means Bioware was staffed deplorable bluepilled NPCs... Bioware could have fully redeemed ME3 if the game simply allowed Femshep to get gangbanged by 4 ancient Krogan Battlemasters but instead EA forced Bioware to be racist thus makes Femshep bang Javik instead!
Doesn't matter if you're regular Shepard or Femshep, the name Commander Captain Shepard still fits reasonably enough, Ashley recites the poem "Oh Captain my Captain" to you in her attempts to seduce you, sometimes the Quarians refer to you as Captain Shepard, etc so it is like you, the player, can almost taste the meta sometimes when you RP a Shepard whose first name is Captain. its not even that far-fetched of a name for a male human to have, I bet I could pass an irl speechcraft check on some irl npc unsure what to name his son or daughter I could pretty easily convince the undecided guy to name the baby Captain if I felt like it
>Mako was perhaps one of the most gifted and talented slicers in the Galaxy during her time. Described as having an unnatural affiliation for every kind of computer as a child, she had taught herself all known forms of programming language by age 7. Mako's natural skills at slicing were further augmented by an advanced cybernetic implant which gave her a direct uplink to the holonet. Her skill was so great that she was able to slice into both Republic and Imperial databases simultaneously and edit records without leaving any traceable trail. An unprecedented feat for a team of slicers let alone one person
>she had taught herself all known forms of programming language by age 7
>ALL known forms of programming language
Mako is fluent in over 6 million forms of communication, which I'd consider pretty impressive. Earth alone has thousands of programming languages, so just imagine how many programming languages exist in the kotor Galaxy? 600,549,598,946 on just Coruscant alone maybe? idk, I'm not a droidsmith or a slicer
Idk I just remember talk some spamming virgin who people said makes a lot of posts like these on different boards and cited this thread as an example of your work. Iirc you usually have 3-4 up at once and are some kind of neet but for the life of me can’t remember the name
Dear OP, this thread inspired me to buy this game on sale. Thank you
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>Ackhsually you live in your moms basement all alone without a friend in the world and you're the elected monarch of the underground incel communities some guy told me you have never touched a woman in your life he also redpilled me all about how you intentionally attempt to make 4chan a gayer place all day every day 365 days a year as part of your master plan to destroy the world
>Source: my butt
Ok bro your silly accusations terrify me. Im literally shaking

Hell yeah man based I hope you find outer space to your liking. Make sure you play on Insanity difficulty as opposed to gayboy difficulty, as a SPECTRE Commander Crapass Shepard has the most difficult and demanding job in the fucking Galaxy so the difficulty level should reflect this to accomadate the gamer with a more acceptable meta intake to compensate imho. Anyway as an additional Lore tip here are listed the most probable canon names for the 6 combat classes:

>Soldier: Commander Cobra Shepard
>Female Soldier: Commander Killer Shepard
>Engineer: Commander R2-D2 Shepard
>Female Engineer: Commander Blooblez Shepard
>Vanguard: Commander Conker Shepard
>Female Vanguard: Commander Moo Moo Shepard
>Infiltrator: Commander Bruce Wayne Shepard
>Female Infiltrator: Commander Batgirl Shepard
>Sentinel: Commander Roboto Shepard
>Female Sentinel: Commander Fireballer Shepard
>Adept: Commander Zero Shepard
>Female Adept: Commander Naked Shepard

Not that you have to use the estimated canon names of course but thats probably them if you feel you need them for Lore research or whatever. The most important thing is that you have fun though, which means I can not advise purchasing Andromeda even if it is on sale for 99% off
I've samefagged a lot in this thread tbqh i have enjoyed manipulating u
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>heh. I've outwitted and BTFO'd Lorechad himself via God's 4 Dimensional holo-Dejarik board a lot in this thread tbqh
>this happens a lot more often than you'd expect actually
>btw did you know on that same evening I also skillfully managed to outwit and BTFO Gary Kasparov and Deep Blue in a 2v1 casual match with me wielding nothing but 4 pawns and 1 single bishop to handicap myself against such embarrassingly novice challengers?
>source: heh... just trust me bro.. Uh, skill issue much??
Massive if true. Holy shit. I never thought I'd ever say this to anybody ever but DAMN I'm legitimately impressed (if true)
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Bioware should have allowed the player to choose NOT to breakup the fights between Tali/Legion and/or Jack/Miranda. Just let them fight to the death while Commander Shepard chows down on some space popcorn with front row seats encouraging them duel to the death. Presumably Tali and Miranda would defeat Legion and Jack if Shepard did not intervene just considering how those two tend equip higher level plot armor than Jack and Legion do
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>I know Kung Fu
>in fact... i've actually known faar more about the deeper intricacies of Kung Fu mastery ever since I was only 7 years old than any other so-called "expert" residing in the Wanderhome Galaxy
only known way to master over 1 million languages that fast is how Keanu Reeves mastered over 1 million forms of martial arts in 1 day in 1999...
>be average cyborg human
>Download (via piracy) over 1 million languages and over 1 million MMA styles directly into your brainchip from the extranet
It is THAT easy!
>Commander Conker Shepard
Is that a reference to the britbong game of smacking nutshells together, or a reference to Conker the squirrel?
>Is that a reference to A or B?
Both. Also wtf, C&C is British? I never would have guessed
For me personally? I am fucking outraged at these 4chan ads saying 2006 social media is back. No, we can't just "go back". Yeah maybe we can always "look back", but we can never actually literally go back. Humanity's golden age has since passed our civilization by. Like the Mass Effect space niggers we are travelers, always moving forward, and never once looking back. You can't redo the last mission, at best learn from your mistakes and learn from your previous failures so as to not fuck up the next mission. It'd be like Commander Tommy Nightmare Shepard pretending it was still 2180 AD so the Rapers magically never even happened. It is ludocris because the Rapers DID happen. I don't give a Vorcha's ass about your bs advertisements, I am not giving you bastards clicks, youre even worse than the lowlife femoid Vorcha whores who are only 18 years and 3 days old who advertise their fucking Onlyfans accounts here. Get lost you evil merchant guild scum literally go eat 500,000 units of refined diseased Krogan excrement you greedy vile Vol-clan corpo faggot backstabber race/faction of kikes NOBODY WANTS YOU HERE OKAY?

If you appreciate me just fucking listen! The Rapers are out there! We'll all have to work together to stop the real baddies, so please don't throw your lives away because of some delusional psyop about fake Geth gay shit! I assure you we CAN NOT time travel back to 2006. PLEASE do not click&feed the lying soulless ads&advertisers damnit! Every ad you click means you deposit 350+ credits into 50+ Volus fuckheads accounts, that is the scale yes it is a trap

I suppose you must be the schizophrenic freak repeatedly baiting me claiming Morinth is the weakest Asari on Omega. Very obvious bait to provoke me to post epic Morinth Lores for your fapping pleasure. Yes? Pathetic
To be fair I also talk to myself irl constantly why would I be any different here? I'm not a flipflopper
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>Be Mordin Solus
>Smartest man in the Galaxy and this is literally impossible for anybody to debunk
>Fluent in over 9,000 droid languages as a side hobby by age 50
>still get schooled by some 12 year old slicer (an impoverished orphan human chick from Nar Shadda) who is fluent in more than 6,000,000 times as many droid languages as you
Were they mary sue?
This is 100% repressing tranny behavior. Please take your hormones alice
Bro do you even read topic titles? I am providing very serious Lore tips to you guys the Mass Effect community, I am not preaching nonsense you should accept media Indoctrination I.E. self-castrate, consume insane hormonal gendermorph chems, breast implants, etc. All of that crap is derranged. Don't advocate any more of your gey crap in my Lore thread you perverted faggot
You need to stop repressing and just accept it lmao you arent fooling anyone
>You need to stop being so straight so we can go gey it up in the cargo hold together!
we're not getting gay married. I'm not gay. And even if you were a female? I don't even think straight marriage is a wise engagement unless maybe the bride is like 11 but that is pretty illegal in my country until the bombs drop soon

>Youre not fooling anybody!
Wrong again Sherlock. I could easily pass a level 90 speechcraft check online rn over 4chan to make you sit down irl to quietly rethink your life and fucking kys tonight if I wanted to but I don't feel like being a bloodthirsty cloaca here so instead I'll go ahead with taking the based moral high road and let you live tough guy
Thread's still up. Good. Keep winning, schizochad.
>I-im not a woman I’m a big strong racist man!!!
>"No, you retard! Don't you get it, human? The Rapers are millions of years more advanced than us. Surrender or death are our only realistic options!"
>"FFS Saren! You could have resisted! You could have fought back! Instead you surrendered! You cucked out and quit! You fucking disgrace not only the SPECTREs but are an embarrassment to all organic life in the Galaxy!"
>"Maybe you're right.. Maybe there is still a chance for revenge.. NO THE INDOCTRINATION ITS TOO INTENSE! I am sorry, it is.. too late for me.."
>"There's still one way to stop this! IF YOU'VE GOT THE GUTS!"
>"Goodbye, Shepard. Thank you"
>"SAREN WAIT! I.. Uh.."
>"Yes? You what?"
>"I'm sorry okay?"
>"You're... What the fuck? What are you talking about, Shepard!?"
>"Stop being a fool! You're really going to fucking kys just because I screamed at you for being an easily-manipulated Indoctrination slave?"
>"DON'T FUCKING INTERRUPT ME OUT OF MUH HONURABLU SUIDOKO SHEPARD! You made your point! The Rapers view us as lower than even space cattle... The only way I can redeem myself now is to self-terminate!"
>"Fool!! I was the one who successfully renegade checked you to kys just now! You think I can't successfully charm check you to put the fucking gun down and seek help rn!?"
>"You can't! Literally impossible!"
>"I'll prove I can!"
>"Saren! Let go of your hatred of Humanity! I can fix you"
>"Fix me...? Are you insane? Look at me, I'm a fucking monster! More machine now than Tu.."
>"We're cool with it. We don't discriminate on my ship. Please stop being an assblasted faggot and join my crew! If we team up we WILL stop the Rapers!"
>"Saren, we'll bang okay?"
>"We will? When?"
>"Soon. We can bang on the extranet. Make it public. When the Galaxy sees our powerful sex vids we gain a powerful unification symbol bringing an end to all racial conflict between our peoples"
>"FUCK you are right again Shepard, I must consneed to your wisdom.. human"
Did you guys hear? Mass effect got a remaster
Omg no way
Is this true?
Can anyone confirm
Yes its true!
Yes way!
What is it called?
Mass Effect Legendary Edition
Oh i heard about that one already
I thought you were talking about something new
There hasnt been anything new about Mass Effect in a pretty long time though...
If i only talk about new stuff there wont be anything to talk about.
Thats true.
Yeah so lets talk about Mass Effect Legendary Edition
How is it?
Is it good?
Its the entire Mass Effect trilogy with all the DLCs included but it looks better so yeah.
Ok that sounds good but how much does it cost?
For 3 whole games and all their dlcs???
And its remastered too!?!?
Wow what a steal!
Yeah Bioware is so generous.
It should have been at least 100$ but they gave it to us for only 60$.
This makes me want to buy Dragon Age Veilguard to show my support
Lets do it then
Preorder isnt available yet...
Yeah shame they arent letting people pre-order yet.
I would have preordered even if the release date is far away to help support Bioware.
Which Mass Effect 3 ending was your favorite?
The green ending because green is my favorite color and all the endings are the same anyways.
Mine was Red because i like Red it reminds me of dragons and blood.
Red is cool too but personally i like green more.
What is green even the color of?
Like grass and trees and stuff?
I like plants i like how flowers smell i like to put my naked feet into wet grass and move the mud between my toes...
Nature is so relaxing y'know?
I never thought about it that way maybe you're right green can be pretty cool also.
Ewww you put your feet in mud?
Thats where worms come out of...
You're disgusting...
Dont talk to him that way hes my friend.
You're friends with someone gross who puts their feet in dirt?
Do you want fleas?
Maybe you're right i dont want fleas.
Sorry >>3559658 but we cant be friends anymore because you have fleas from playing araund in the mud
No i dont have fleas!!!
Hes lying!!!
You cant catch fleas from playing with the mud with your toes!!!
Fleas grow on qnimals not in dirt!!!
How am i supposed to know YOURE not the one lying to try to give me fleas?
I-... i dont know..
I thought you were my friend and you would trust me over some random person but i guess i was wrong...
And now im all alone again...
Everybody turns their back on me and then i dont have anyone to discuss Mass Effect with...
Ill talk about mass effect with you.
That would mean a lot to me...
I dont have any friends...
So which companion is your favorite?
Probably Miranda.
I like Miranda too she got a big fat ass.
Actually i like Miranda because she looks like my late mom...
Oh sorry!!!
I didnt mean to make it weird.
Its okay you had no way of knowing that...
Still im sorry i made it weird even if unintentionally!
Its fine.
Lets just move on from this okay?
What is your favorite Mass Effect race?
Mine are Quarian because they kinda look like Frames from Warframe
Mine are Asari because they look like whatever the person looking at them wants them to look i think thats so cool.
What if somebody wanted fried chicken?
Would you look to them like a big chicken nugget?
I hope not that would be scary...
Being chased araund by someone who wants to eat you alive because you look like a chicken nugget to them because they are hungry...
Yeah that would suck.
I wonder if the taste is replicated also or if they would realize you're another person once they bite into you?
If they bite into your neck or something it wouldnt matter you would be dead from one bite anyways.
Whats your favorite Mass Effect?
Mine is 3.
I liked 2 most i think.
Idk i just did.
Im not very good at explaining my reasons for liking something i kinda... just do.
Oh ok.
So hows your day?
I woke up,brushed my teeth,ate breakfast and started getting ready for work and then i suddently realized its the weekend so theres no work so i sat down put some music on and started browsing 4chan.
Im unemployed so i dont have any work.
I just browse 4chan and play vidya everyday.
That sounds cool.
I wish i could do that but i got bills to pay.
Bills are such a strange concept you have to pay a monthly subscription to LIVE.
Shelter,water and electricity should be free.
If they did that they would tax the working people even harder like 90% tax and nobody would work so nobody would be assembling your food at mcdonald or working the power plant to get your electricity etc.
I wish we could like replace mcdonald cooks and powerplant workers with AI then.
Like instead of replacing artist the corporations should replace jobs that we actually need to live so we can ge them for free since its AI generated electricity etc.
That sounds good in theory but it would make humanity forget how to do those things on their own and if the machines every broke down we would go extinct.
I disagree.
Even if humans forgot how to cook they wouldnt go extinct because they existed before cooking was invented
What do they eat in Mass Effect anyways?
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That pizza looks so realistic is this from the Legendary Edition?
You can tell they put a lot of love into making this remake.
This sushi on the other hand looks a little too sharp.
It looks like it would cut you.
I think thats a cosplayer at a real Pizzeria.
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If the thread makes it over 200 days I think we can officially say there's no game that /vrpg/ cares about less except maybe daggerfall.
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It this all just one anon talking to himself? The post times are sus.
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Theres an quest dedicated to this in Mass Effect Andromeda that explains a planets local quisine.
I love ramen.
If i could eat something everyday it would be ramen.
Yes. Someone has been coming here and shitting up the board every single day to do this. You know all the those throwaway threads asking retarded questions just to get attention? Yeah...
Maybe i should play Andromeda someday.
I skipped it because of all the controversy with how buggy it is but lately i have wanted to play it.
Is it good?
I heard they fixed it with patches after release.
I think it is.
Thread's close to bump limit, so he's trying to reach it faster. Jannies should IP wipe him afterwards for teh lolz because I want another Rean spammer reveal.
It was ok but not as good as the first 3 games but maybe they made it better with updates like No Mans Sky.
I havent played it lately.
Thinking aloud =/= samefagging
Those fruit in the back on the shelf kinda look like Durians.
Yeah its pretty cool how Mass Effect makes referances to real life things sometimes
I'd like to think he's giving us a window into his life in this thread. He just gets up and samefags for hours. I doubt he has a job like he claims and just said that in a previous post to cover his ass.
Eh its okay as long as you dont expect it to be as good as other Mass Effect games.
You have to come into it with no expectations and then you might enjoy it.
What other schizos does this board have? All I know of is FF Loreschizo and Farquad.
is this the new reddit term for identifying quirky posters?
Have there been any scifi RPGs ever since Mass Effect?
I want another game to recapture that feeling of adventuring through space.
The closest thing i can think of is pr9bably Anachronox but it came out before Mass Effect and its really old so its really ugly and its a turn based game instead of a action rpg like Mass Effect but it kind of has a vibe of adventuring through space going from planet to planet in a kinda half scifi setting but also with some magic.
I heard that name before but didnt try it yet.
Is it any good?
How bad are the graphics?
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Its intresting.
I dont know how to discribe it.
Its definitely worth playing.
>How bad are the graphics?
Pretty bad but not completely awful to the point you cant tell what is what.
Ok ill try it.
Ok lets settle it once and for all who is the cannon mc.
Femshepphard or male shephard.
Male Shepard.
Hes on all the box arts.
Female Shepard.
Shes on all the ads.
I feel like a lot of people get lost on what Mass Effect is reqlly about.
Its not about shooting guns.
Its not about space.
Its not about Leveling Up.
Its about the connections we make with other people.
Its about the friends we made along the way.
I agree.
People often misunderstand what Bioware games are supposed to be and think too much about it and notice things like the Dragon Age Setting is called THE(DAS) but its not about the setting.
Its about Morrigan,its about Alistar,Its about Wynn and all the other friends you make in this virtual world.
Wynn is shit.
You should have said Lilliana or something not that elderly hag.
I mentioned Liliana before and people got mad about that too because she has a NTR DLC dedicated to her past relationship.
Im tired...
Tired of what?
You arent doing anything just typing some letters on a keyboard.
Tired of all the toxicity amd animosity on this website.
Why does everyone have to be so damn rude about everything...
I know what you mean but i dont think i was being rude.
You were rude.
You called my favorote character shit and then belittled my tiredness telling me i have nothing to be tired about its just the internet but dealing with toxicity on the internet is so tiresome.
I disagree.
Fuck you.
Now THATS what being rude really looks like stop being such a hypocrite.
And look at that. Thread died immediately once it hit bump limit.This is such a faggot board.
You're the same fuckhead who killed the Samuel Hyde batting for Caesar thread with an identicle tactic of spamming a 50+ post samefag conversation with yourself spanning within 15 minutes to kill threads that offend your holiness?

Why are you such a spoilsport? Do you often lose control chimping out and kick over innocent children's sand castles at the beach during your outrageous PMS rampages? Ffs you're too autistic to function faggot

Aye. It is f0cking sus af Captain! Alert the top brass about this bs asap sir, thanks!

I mean I do what I can to help keep this board based but some enraged faggot got jealous of our powerlevels thus he nuked the thread to Oblivion like an hour ago. Ah well, whatever, I have to get back to my mission anyway
>You're the same boogeyman who-
I don't believe you. You pulled a 100% identicle manuever as last time, when you samefag to impersonate several of the most fucking unimagitively lifeless NPC worms imaginable having long fake convos consisting of the most drab boring lifeless posts about an RPG possible. dozens spammed in extremely short moments of each other like:

>nice post man! Which was your favorite DLC?
>Lonesome Road
>based! what did you like best about Lonesome Road?
>I liked the combat
>me too. It is a very underrated DLC. Especially the combat. What was your 2nd favorite FNV dlc?
>Honest Hearts
>the map design was pretty good
>I agree it had great maps

Sir. When you engage in your samefag threadkiller tactic your posting style becomes even more distinct and recognizable than even my own, you're fooling nobody you fat dumb asshole. Especially since in each indiviual instance of you doing this on the 501st post you gloat like an autistic niglord "HAH! THE FUCKING THREAD DIED! TOTAL VICTORY!! GET REKT LOSERS!"
Get a life, schizo.
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>get a life
Most hypocritical post ITT, look in the mirror. And... Ironically spoken by 4chan's utmost autist who just wasted over 200+ minutes of his own "valuable time" to produce an insufferably corny 100+ post samefag conversation in a desperate spite attempt to kill a thread that ruffles his feathers. Yet you shamelessly tell others to get a life? Meanwhile you're the only anon I know of who gives off enough severe autism vibes that you'd most likely be a perfectly viable test subject for Project Overlord yourself. If I were TIM I'd fire pic related and replace him with you for better results
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Bros. Shit grows more and more tense as my irl enemies approach closer and closer so sadly I can not post a new Mass Effect freaking epic tier of a Lore thread for you SciFi RPG nerd niggers just yet! No way. Not until I purchase a new 1 bedroom apartment playerhome to discreetly lay low in. I already have a place lined up but Landlords in this sector are pretty gay about the move-in timing so I'll probably move in there August 1st, September 1st or maybe even October 1st at the latest

Egypt anon, if you're randomly reading this, you asked for a head? I brought you a head! MISSION COMPLETE! The queen of all local kikes lay defeated and my loyal squaddie Dogs are rescued back in my hands, but now I'm on the run from her! Sorry I couldn't answer your 10/10 retro versus 10/10 future RPG comparison question in time before the Indoctrination thread died. My bad but just ask me the same query again in my next ME Lore thread and I'll get back to you quick. I'll post said thead as soon as I buy that new safehouse hideout I just mentioned bretty s00n bro no worries

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