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lmao they just posted this on the steam page then deleted it half an hour later

/r/eu5 is banning anyone who even mentions it


previous thread: >>2369026
>>
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>>2377306
PDX simps for the red man
>>
Sweet! We need more alt history DLC. Historychudcels LOST
Sandboxchads WIN
Wakanda DLC next
>HRE still won't work by 2027
>Indians will have tech parity with cumskins forever
>>
>>2377306
So playing as the SoPs like they promised?
>>
>>2377306
What is their fucking obsession with Abos, anyways? This is like dedicating an expansion for fucking Congolese pygmies
>>
>>2377306
>200 new Indigenous groups
>>
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These were the previously playable North American tags
>>
>>2377345
hmm yes we're ready to release the game
>>
>>2377306
Not surprising, it was a bit weird there wasn't a single playable option in all of australia. even if it was notorious for being unfun in EU4
but I don't think people will be interested in buying this
really if anything is gonna be given australia content it should be crusader kings, should run like a dream too since nobody ever fucking touched the place so if you play in australia they can just make australia the only place the game calculates
>>
>>2377347
>>2377345
nobody cares about the new world tags, fix europe, north africa and the middle east
>>
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>>2377306
>Play as people stuck in the Bronze Age
No.
Fix your fucking game, Paradox.
>>
>>2377310
Looking forward to them catching up to European institutions by the 1500s.

>>2377363
Subhuman bushmen who never discovered the wheel are the priority in EU5, CHUD.
>>
>>2377363
Eu5 is an alt history sandbox, just as Johan intended. If you want history go read a book!
>Redditors literally say this
>>
>>2377345
This is disingenuous. You aren't showing all the building based nations that cover north america.
>>
>>2377306
Is this a joke?
>>
>>2377364
Reported for racism outside of b, chud
>>
>>2377348
>it was a bit weird there wasn't a single playable option in all of australia
These were "people" who literally didn't have the technology for fire.
>>
>>2377379
But isn't western Australia a desert because ancient abos burnt down the whole forest to hunt animals?
>>
>>2377382
Yes, and then they lost the technology, and couldn't go back.
>>
>>2377384
How do you use the technology to make fire?
>>
>>2377385
Fuck my life.
How do you LOSE the technology to make fire?
>>
>>2377386
>How do you LOSE the technology to make fire?
Yes. That is my point, how absurd it is.
>>
>>2377306
>Native Expansion
As long as it's not like EU4 it'll be fine

>We've managed to modernise and we're the centre of a trade network linking the Viceroyalty or something with our Neighbours up North
>And now we've got a writ telling us we can conquer "Yurowpeeans?" Who?

>>2377338
Basically >>2377364

Historically, and in all possible universes there is no way tribes as unorganised as the Oz Abos could have fended off the Europeans or any landed state with a navy and an army. It's basically the same appeal as the Ryukyu Challenge- Survive the assault and Thrive.

The problem with these natives runs is that you are way, way behind, and at least in Eu3/4, you had to wait for Europeans to come to you and park yourself next to their province before you can do anything. Thus making the first half of the game a very boring waiting game with maybe one or two buttons to push.

The flipside of the button is that, colonisation tends to be boring as fuck. You send your navy in, park a brigade, press button to send people, press a button to provoke a rebellion and wipe them out, wait for gauge to fill up and land in yours. In like 50 years all of America is yours. Now compare this to the real-life history where it took maybe 200 years for America to stretch from coast to coast and the history of the Settler Wars being very similar to the state-to-state wars fought in Europe. Some natives ally with you, other natives with their own agenda ally with your enemies.


>>2377382
I've been to Western Australia. Like the East there are packets of green areas mostly concentrated in the Southwest. These are the areas most Europeans ended up settling.

>>2377384
But they didn't? Controlled burnings were still used by the time the First Fleet landed in Sydney Cove.
>>
>>2377390
>Yes you can play natives in America
>But you can't ever leave America or get high-level tech because AHISTORICAL
>>
>>2377379
They're pretty unadvanced people but they had fire, fire and very rudimentary crossbow type things
>>
>>2377392
I'm brown and trans btw
>>
>>2377306
Who the fuck asked for this? Instead of fixing the solid base for the game they focus on something no-one gives a fuck about.
>>
>>2377306
Fucking told yoy that there would be colonization dlc
>>
>>2377379
Are you trying to derail the discussion with a "false-flag strawman?"

Other people are literally blaming Aboriginals for Australia being desert because they *checks notes* burned down the forests.

Quick online search says that they did controlled burns in a manner that was so organized, that at least some amateur historian argues it should count as agriculture. Basically they manipulated their environment to make it produce more stuff that humans can eat.

>On the other hand, anthropologist Peter Sutton and archaeologist Keryn Walshe have argued, in Farmers or Hunter-Gatherers, that Aboriginal people demonstrably fell short of agriculture. For Sutton, Aboriginal societies were highly conservative and although at least some of them were aware of agricultural practices, they avoided agriculture because they resisted the incorporation of such foreign ways of life into their spirituality and culture.
>And for his part, Sutton gets a little pedantic when making his case for exactly this reason. He notes that one Aboriginal group would harvest wild yams by uprooting them, cutting off the bulk of the tuber, and then returning the rest of the plant to its hole where it would regrow. Is this farming or gardening? No, says, Sutton, it would need to be replanted elsewhere to qualify. Likewise, he admits that Aboriginal people would scatter seeds in "increase ceremonies" to promote new growth but argues that this isn't agriculture because little care was taken to find fertile ground.
>>
I really enjoyed the release with the pops and everything, but after I've found the game really boring and slow, why isn't EU5 fun compared to EU4? I want to enjoy the game but it's entirely bland.
>>
>>2377426
People said the exact same thing when eu4 released.
>Why play eu4 which is so bland when eu3 is so much better?!
>>
So the next 3 expansions after ERE are Auld-Alliance, North African shit, and natives? Have they lost their fucking minds?
>>
>>2377422
You're brown
>>
>>2377428
Sure, but then they did say the same thing about CK3 which still isn't able to reach the heights of 2.
>>
>>2377448
The point is people always complain about new releases.
It will take many years but eu5 will be fun eventually.
>>
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>>2377306
I hope they will finally add rape and genocide with this
>>
>>2377449
But will it? As I said I'm not a fan of CK3, Vicky 3 was total shit. I can see a good structure for EUV, better than the other two, but to say it will get fixed is overly optimistic considering the last paradox releases.
>>
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>>2377313
>Native Americans are alternative history
>>
>>2377471
Yes, they are basically an extinct people.
>>
>>2377471
Yes. indians as they prefer to be called are just the missing scythians who practiced scalping, their history isn't 1/100th as long as they claim.
>>
>>2377475
I don't think they like the name indians cause they don't want to be lumped in with street shitters.
>>
>>2377471
It is pretty alt history when you show up to NA and there's a hyper empire with modern tech there.
>>
>>2377483
So what you're saying is the player shouldn't be allowed to play outside of Europe?
>>
>>2377348
DLC will paywall actually working colonization mechanics. Come on, guys, I think it's way past time for you to realize how paradox does things
Screencap this, without this dlc africa will still be fully colonizeerd and assimilated by 1600
>>
>>2377486
Europa Universalis, the game where the devs leave Europe completely broken and Kiev is the strongest superpower right behind france while releasing content for literally anyone except for central europe
>>
What's the use case for defensive leagues?
>>
>>2377494
Stop complaining about Europe when Japan is completely unplayable.
>>
>>2377496
Getting acceptance for vassalisation if you can't get they refuse an alliance
>>
>>2377496
getting your two allies that hate eachother to protect eachother against a bigger enemy on a semi permanent basis, mostly france or a rising power in the empire. Also seems like it's good for hugboxes in MP who don't necessarily need or want to be allied.
>>
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>>2377366
>Redditors literally say this
The game is such a shitshow redditors are now recommending eachother to pirate the game.
>>
>>2377310
I mean it's retarded that it's even a thing but only one of those native "countries" are even playable. the rest are just fodder for euro colonists.
>>
>>2377302
Spotting that population growth is too large and need a nerf seems like something they should have discovered in the simulation runs several years ago
also population growth should depend on the cost of food in a trade zone.
>>
>>2377535
Cheap food does affect pop growth
>>
>>2377535
Game used to have disasters and pop growth was even higher in the past but those got scrapped in the playtesting because dealing with disasters wasn't fun and people wanted to watch the numbers go up.
>>
>>2377538
I think it just affects immigration attraction.
"Free land" increases pop growth, whatever that is supposed to represent
>>
>>2377540
Observe some more next time bucko
>>
>>2377538
>>2377540
I was wrong. Though it's just a measly 0.1 percent. Compared to 1.5 possible from plentiful land.
>>
>>2377539
Oh yeah, clicking buttons once in a while is much more fun
I think they just couldn't make disasters work, like they still didn't fix Branderburg disaster, half of a year after release, so, if you can't make something work-cut it instead and say it just wasn't fun
>>
I think the game should have much more pop growth but a lot more diseases and famines too
>>
>>2377543
I don't mean those disasters, I mean real disasters, floods, famines, earthquakes and plagues that sort of thing.
>>
>>2377539
But watching the black death ravage your population is the one good thing to have come out of them moving back the start date
>>
>>2377539
Letting eu4troons be play testers was a disaster for the Eu5 race. Imagine the ludokino of half your population being wiped out by superaids every 50 years, and even being able to weaponize diseases. Vgh....
>>
https://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/game-strayed-to-far-from-eu-iv.1916003/
Meanwhile, in the land of paracucks
>The game isnt enough like EU4, that's the REAL problem!
>Nothing about how if the actual base mechanics of EU5 worked right, that it would be the best by paradox game ever released
These fucking faggots are going to kill EU5 forever if Johan listens to them. I know you read these threads you fat fuck
Stop
Listening
To
Sandboxtroons
Fix the fucking game and make situations, trade, navy combat, AI logic WORK and finally FIX DYNASTIES DYING OUT so the HISTORY actually plays out. Remove 90% of the requirements for DHEs, add soft railroading, if these faggot niggers want a sandbox they can toggle NON HISTORICAL in the fucking GAME RULES
That's literally all you have to do
It's so good damn frustrating that Johan doesn't even seem to give a shit. Him automatically doing this economy rework is a good first step, but we need to hear him say
>Historical mode will be historical. If you don't want that toggle it off
That's literally all he needs to do to inspire confidence in whatever drug addled vision he has for this game
Or just pay the modders who are fixing your game with railroading and AI mods to fix your game, because clearly the pajeets you let be your internal QA are fucking dogshit
>>
>>2377604
The mechanics do work right, the game is just an idle game. The outright bugs don't actually impact this final assessment in any ways except make it a bad idle game.
>>
>>2377606
Yeah naval combat and situations and dynasties all work great
Shut the fuck up you've never played the game
>>
>>2377604
>gets blown out by votes and the first response
>starts seething here instead
>>
>>2377604
People that complain about the game not always turning out exactly the same way are insufferable.
>>
>>2377614
>if i strawman the argument into a redundant talking point that makes it irrelevant
>>
>>2377535
>population growth is too large
That has to be a joke. Population growth and collapse are too weaks, that's the issue. Famine should decimate a location every month, not slightly lower the growth.
>>
>>2377615
Your point was always irrelevant.
You want the game to railroad you into always doing what happened in history.
You want to eliminate blobbing. The one thing that everyone likes to do.
>>
>>2377619
Kill yourself you tranny fucking faggot
>>
>>2377619
>oh no a credible and powerful enemy to stop me, how will i ever map paint now
Said no one ever.
>>
>>2377310
I vaguely get why someone might want to play a native in EU period you at least have a fighting chance to grow before the Europeans get there. But having never played V3 adding the chance to play an abo in the 1820s with Britain already present sounds genuinely pointless surely you're dead 15 minutes into gameplay.
>>
>>2377624
What the fuck are you talking about?
>>
>>2377629
Kill yourself sandboxtroon
>>
>>2377635
>No you can't full annex the ottomans as Byzantium! They're supposed to die!!
Fuck you. I'll play the game I paid for any way I want.
>>
>>2377636
You sir, are an idiot.
>>
>>2377637
Nice ad hom.
I accept your concession.
>>
>>2377606
>The mechanics do work right
In the two campaings I have played the Religious War situation sits in my notifications for 200+ years. Nothing fucking happens.
In fact most situations don't work at all. The only one that barely does is the Hundred Years War and in most games France wraps it up in 40 years because they are stupidly OP.
>>
>>2377641
I've played quite a few games and I've never had the HYW wrap up that quick.
>>
>>2377645
I would say wrap up and become irrelevant can be the same, if England loses the first war, they're going to be an irrelevant that loses every subsequent war and eventually the situation ends.
>>
>>2377650
Fair. When I say wrap up I mean the situation ends.
And I never see it end pre-1400.
>>
>>2377428
>People said the exact same thing when eu4 released.
Disagree, I played EU4 at launch and it was an immediate improvement over 3. 3 was always janky and weird and I liked 2 more.
EU4 didn’t get shitty until after multiple years of DLC bloat running it into the ground.
>>
>>2377422
>Quick online search says
Stopped reading here
>>
>>2377652
>I played EU4 at launch and it was an immediate improvement over 3
You are high. Eu4 was abysmal at launch.
>>
>>2377645
You're a lying tranny, eu4troon
>>
>>2377664
Try following the conversation railroadfag.
>>
>>2377656
Disagree. 3 had so much stupid annoying shit in it that was a breath of fresh air to be done with, like merchant spam and magistrate spam.
The only big annoyance I remember from launch EU4 was vassals sniping your sieges and then not handing them over. AoW was a good QoL overhaul.
>>
>>2377668
The biggest annoyance in eu4 1.0 was having to siege every fucking province. It was tedious as fuck.
>>
>>2377667
Reminder this sandboxtroon is the same faggot who posted this >>2377422
Notice how this same retard says shit about the game like >>2377636
All sandbox eu4trannies are like this. They worship brown people and NEED EU5 to be le ebin world conquest sandbox where whitet can be beaten by subhumans despite in history them being completely buck broken by 500 English or dutch dudes with frilly pants
Reminder if you engage with a sandboxtroon it is never being said in good faith.
>>
>>2377674
You are legit schizophrenic.
>>
>>2377596
This but unironically
Getting rekt by Ratto or famine every 20 years or so would be fun if you bounced back within a decade or so
>>
>>2377675
>N-no u!
Brown, Jewish, trans, all wrapped in one. The jew fears white man's pattern recognition
>>
>>2377641
That's not the mechanics. That's the content. It wouldn't fundamentally change anything if navies died correctly or they fixed some of the messed up situations.
>>
>>2377678
>The game doesn't have fundamentally broken systems goy! What we need is aoereria content, the HRE works exactly as intended :^)
Kys
>>
>>2377679
Do you have reading comprehension issues? The mechanics of the game ARE working correctly. The content is messed up but it doesn't matter because it's irrelevant anyways. If HRE "worked as intended" it would be garbage, now it's broken garbage. It's the same thing
>>
why don't i get cores of my accepted culture
i accepted turkish as cilicia but none of my turkish provinces get cores
>inb4 wait a month tick
i waited a full year
>>
>>2377691
Turks have to be 50% and it has to be integrated
>>
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>>2377694
>it has to be integrated
im so fucking stupid
>>
>>2377695
>he thought he was just gonna get automatic cores
>>
>an accepted culture larger than the primary culture
name a single example of this in history where the "accepted culture" didn't just become primary
in a scenario where Cilicia accepts Turks and Turks make up 66%+ of the population you should just become a Beylik.
>>
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>>2377704
integration is 50% slower because of cultural tradition bullshit
do i just swap to turkish at this point
>>
>>2377714
Get your cultural influence mana up. Spam libraries and Universities.
>>
>>2377306
Imagine being a strategy game dev
Imagine you decide your game should be using animated, 3D portraits
Imagine you need to then make them for each and every culture group and ethnicity in your game
Imagine you keep needing to make more of those
Imagine your game requiring top of the line GPU to run at all
While it's a spreadsheet game

I will never understand this insanity
>>
>>2377719
Eu5 does not require a top of the line GPU to run. At all.
>>
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>>2377712
Qing dynasty
>>2377714
>culture swapping
>ever
If you conquered their culture it means their historical destiny is to be a slave race. You're not going to cuck yourself into being a slave race, are you Anon?
>>
>>2377721
>qing
>didn't just become chinese
come on now
>>
>>2377688
Kys
>>
>>2377719
>Imagine you decide your game should be using animated, 3D portraits
>Imagine you need to then make them for each and every culture group and ethnicity in your game
Yeah, I am imagining this because it isn't the case at all.
They made Iranians Indian ethnicity. Everyone from Mexico to the Malvinas is a squat red faced Aztec. Japanese and Cambodians look Identical.
>>
When does calvinism spawn? I am going for dutch merchant republic and it seems a lot of their dhe is tied to calvinism.
It's 1540 and Calvin still doesn't exist, I don't want to quit campaign just because paradox, in their infinite wisdom, desided to tie a major reformation religion to rng
Also, I want to rand a little about how much of a joke anglicanism is. It's like they saw that it's basically a once in a lifetime confession to spawn, and desided to not give it buffs and preachers, so England converts back to catholicism after Henry VIII equivalent dies and never convert back. It also doesn't see other reformation faiths as positive. Bravo, Johan
>>
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>>2377734
>a lot of their dhe is tied to calvinism.
How do you know?
Both looking through the files and using that stupid db site are shit to navigate.
The event viewer can't come soon enough. They should just release a patch with that before 1.2.
>>
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>>2377737
There are at least two mods that create a new tab to see dhe for a chosen country
>>
>>2377743
but ironman...
>>
>>2377745
I am playing on pirated copy with cheat mod. No, I don't care, I want to be able to enable debug on a fly to hop over to other countries to fix stupid shit and make things move
>>
>>2377749
That's some high level autism right there. The absolute need to "fix" what the AI is doing.
>>
>>2377752
AI very often, acts like a retard and cripples itself. Every time I don't intervene to fix their local gov placement, economy and dynastic situation they are left so far behind I can straight up ignore antagonism and start blobbing. No, even railroad mods don't help
Also, a question, does ai improve cultural relations with their vassals? Because I never saw them do that
>>
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I have discovered japan as one of the mighty pueblo tribe
>>
>>2377757
Why even bother helping the AI?
Just fucking kill them and take their shit.
>>
>>2377764
What does AI stand for?
>>
>>2377768
Absolute Immunity.
>>
>>2377764
Winning for a 4th time in first 100 years gets really boring. I want to at least see the age of revolutions and see ai not crippled on a floor crying
>>2377768
Artificial Idiot
>>
Now that the dust has settled what campaigns are actually fun, fleshed out, and at least relatively bug free?
>>
>>2377774
Muscovy is fun, France is fleshed out and Cahokia is bug free
None fulfill all three
>>
>>2377776
>france
what is there even to do
the start game button is the win button
>>
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>>2377777
>what is there even to do
Fix the world
>>
>>2377785
You are actively making the world worse though
More frenchmen...just imagine
>>
>>2377787
more frenchWOMEN though... vgh...
>>
>>2377791
French women are gross. They don't shave.
>>
>>2377785
Lets see you do that with Ulm tho.
>>
not sure if this is an issue with the new patch or not but i put on an observer game and so far china
>has some of the lowest literacy rates in the world, people remain retarded due to inefficient government
>pop satisfaction is low from all the overpopulation, starvation, and disasters they're too stupid to plan against, but they keep breeding like rats
>buildings don't bother using decent materials because it isn't profitable, so they substitute cheap inputs creating sub-par output goods
>people have no inherent moral philosophy, solely act out of fear of punishment and desire to hoard money
meanwhile japan
>independently instituted terakoya schools, boosting their literacy
>pop satisfaction is sky high
>market has balanced itself perfectly, everyone has their needs met and they're autarkic
>society has blended shinto and nichiren beliefs, ensuring a stable and harmonious society
they're ostensibly the same people so why are one a feckless dirt poor money-grubbing subspecies and the other are intelligent, polite, and stable?
>>
>>2377804
You must not have played very long because Japan explodes on Jan 1, 1400. Like clockwork.
>>
>>2377808
It's weebseethe. He's never played the game before.
>>
>>2377822
There's nothing wrong with being weeb. This is a weeb site after all.
>>
>>2377825
There is when it involves perpetuating harmful and incorrect stereotypes about China.
>>
>>2377803
Why would I want to play as german scum?
>>
>>2377827
>harmful and incorrect stereotypes about China
Oh fuck off.
Chinese are barely human.
>>
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>>2377830
You played as France. I figured you were used to playing as scum.
I don't get to post this very often
>>
>>2377830
Everything "Japanese" is either Chinese or American.
>>
>>2377831
Oh god dammit. Meant for >>2377829
>>2377834
I assume you have some examples?
>>
>>2377837
>I assume you have some examples?
Name literally anything you think is Japanese.
I'll start:
kimono
>The first instances of kimono-like garments in Japan were traditional Chinese clothing introduced to Japan via Chinese envoys in the Kofun period (300–538 CE; the first part of the Yamato period), through immigration between the two countries and envoys to the Tang dynasty court leading to Chinese styles of dress, appearance, and culture becoming extremely popular in Japanese court society.
Flower festivals
>The practice of hanami is many centuries old. The custom is said to have started during the Nara period (710–794) when it was plum or ume blossoms that people admired in the beginning. The Japanese practice of hanami originated from the Chinese custom of enjoying poetry and wine underneath plum blossom trees while viewing their flowers, that was replicated by Japanese elites.
The Japanese do not have one original invention.
>>
>>2377840
>CE
>pulling facts from wikipedia
I accept your concession.
>>
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>>2377382
Most of Australia is a desert because it's extremely flat (the flattest continent) which means no mountains and thus no rain shadow and thus no rivers. Notice that the east coast has the only significant mountain ranges and not coincidentally that's also where the climate is best and all the major cities are.
Now Australia was a fair bit wetter in the distant past, because during Ice Age the whole continent was cooler. Deforestation did happen but the end of the Ice Age is hardly the fault of the Aboriginals, and the effects of global climate would've turned Australia into a desert continent either way.
>>2377379
>>2377384
>>2377385
>>2377386
>>2377388
This is a myth, you will find zero sources on Australians not having fire. The first European settlers witnessed Aboriginal slash and burn themselves, it's just not true.

>>2377422
The reality is that humans have probably always been modifying the environment to suit our food needs since the earliest days of our species. The kind of grain-based agriculture that emerged in Mesopotamia and spread across the Old World is just one way of doing that, as is Aboriginal aquaculture or Eastern Native American woodland cultivation, etc.
>>
>>2377842
lmao keep crying weeb
youll never get your cherished manko
>>
>>2377844
>The first European settlers witnessed Aboriginal slash and burn themselves
hilariously ambiguous grammar
>>
>>2377846
>says the man fellating China
>>
>>2377850
criticizing japan ≠ fellating china
>>
>>2377852
Except you have been fellating China.
>>2377827
>>2377834
>>2377840
etc.
>>
>>2377853
All those posts are criticizing Japan.
>>
>>2377855
>perpetuating harmful and incorrect stereotypes about China
>criticizing Japan
>>
>>2377856
Perpetuating harmful and incorrect stereotypes about China is the modus operandi of the Japanese.
>>
>>2377857
Careful. You're venturing into schizo territory.
>>
>>2377859
Not while I have the immortal science of Xi Jinping thought guiding my psyche.
>>
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>>2377306
Oh boy, even worse performace. Just what I asked for!
>>
>>2377774
Austria is pretty fun, you can fuck up Blobhemia during the Hussite chimpout and have France as a mid-game challenge. Decent resources but you have to deal with the Alps for proximity.
Religious war doesn't work tho, which is a shame. Also no Ottomans 9/10 games
>>
>>2377870
>Religious war doesn't work tho
How do you mean?
You can create the casus belli on anyone not your religion. Including heretics.
>>
The fact Johan is going to do literally anything else before fixing Europe developing with some semblance of historic reality is hilarious. Russia never ever forms in vanilla EU5. Bohemia curb stomps all of central europe. Naples annexes the papal states during/before the western schism even fires. France takes London. Castille never annexes grenada. Ottomans never annex Mamluks. Timurids never conquer anything. Golden horde exists until 1800. War of the roses never happens. Religious wars never happen. Napoopan never happens. USA never forms. Spain never conquers central america. Japan is unplayable and was never once play tested. China is the hegemon of Europe even hundreds of years before they know they exist. The list goes on and on.
Seriously, the fact he's going to seriously go fuck around with abbo "flavor" before fixing any of the things I mentioned is hilarious in the context of EU5 having 5000 concurrent players. Yeah let's give the byzantines some dumb as fuck extra mechanics before literally anything in Europe works bro. Next up, berbers, then abbos! Is he smoking crack?
>Inb4 that seething samefag sandboxslopper
>>
>>2377874
>USA never forms
That never happened in eu4 either.
>>
>>2377875
What a good yardstick of quality to measure against.
Grim.
>>
>>2377876
The USA shouldn't have formed in real life. They should have gratefully housed British soldiers and paid their taxes to cover Britain defending them from France in the Seven Years War.
>>
>>2377875
I've seen them break free plenty of times during the Age of Revolutions
>>
>>2377874
It's all part of his grand scheme to filter out the playerbase until only literal drones who will gladly slurp up everything he shits out are left
>>
>>2377878
I've seen USA form maybe 20% of the games I play that go that far.
It definitely does not happen very often. Because colonial nations are squeamish in declaring independence and they even more rarely actually win.
>>
>>2377874
Look, I know you are angry, but your opinion is entirely, fully, absolutely irrelevant. The only opinions Johan actually cares about is that ones of shareholders, and shareholders say "DLC sell, green line up good"
>>
>>2377882
I bought the game and have submitted dozens of bug reports. None of them have been fixed, including your ruler being stolen by other countries at random. I would buy DLC if it was about the main characters of history; that being white European nations who conquered the entire world just to put pepper on some food.
>>
>>2377884
Europa universalis having playable europe? Preposterous. Sell 6 dlc for african tribes
>>
says a lot that eu5 is the first paradox game to have an inbuilt mechanism to report bugs
>>
>>2377892
Europe is currently the most playable region.
Every other region is 10x worse.
>>
>>2377895
They've got a kpop stan on the dev team so Korea is inexplicably more fleshed out and bug free than even Europe.
>>
>>2377898
I haven't tried Korea yet but I somehow doubt that.
>>
>>2377734
Yeah, it's less than 10 years until Calvin's historical death, I doubt I'll get calvinism in this game.
Thank you Johan, now I clearly see that reformed church is, indeed, ahistorical and shouldn't exist
>>
>>2377881
I just support their independence, that way they usually declare and (mostly) win their independence. But yes, if you're not giving the AI a little push, they don't succeed very often
>>
>>2377904
Hey I've had games where I support their independence for 100 years and they never declare.
>>
>>2377901
>calvinism is the one religion in the game that isn't predestined to spawn
applause, bow, curtain, fin
>>
>>2377901
You have to click "Embrace the reformation" and you can pick between lutheran or calvinist.
At least that's what I did in my NL game.
>>
>>2377905
Even when you agitate for liberty? Happen sometimes with Rio de la Plate, Cascadia or California if they don't have enough dev or if the nations supporting them are too weak
>>
>>2377899
>>2377895
Shut the fuck up faggot. You never played the game
>>
>>2377625
You can't play as those. Instead your colonization meter slowly creeps across each chunk piece by piece.
>>
>>2377625
By contrast the Maori actually btfo'd the Brits to a draw.
It's a shame their halfcaste offspring are doing cringe larps in parliament.
>>
>>2377604
>FIX DYNASTIES DYING OUT so the HISTORY actually plays out
what kind of autism is this? you just want the game to artificially make it so the habsburgs always survive to 1780 or whatever? literally what is the point?
>>
Why is it such a pain in the dickhole to change from Goryeo to Joseon?
>>
>>2377985
Not him but I agree historical dynasties die too easily, and that's mainly because they decided the sex ratio should be 1:7 for some retarded feminist reason
>>
>start researching native names because the vanilla ones fucking suck
>"you know, why am i bothering with this before they make sops playable it's not like you'll ever actually see them half the time"
>this gets announced
I'm sorry, I manifested this one into existence
>>
>>2377994
I think they wanted to incentivize personal unions and the dynastic wars that were era defining, hoping that the one son would marry the daughter of another country.
But instead sons die to hunting accidents, every daughter becomes a queen, and even if they didn't the AI is too retarded to make PUs work anyway. (When they don't instantly break from the king ending up at war with himself)
>>
>>2377998
>>start researching native names because the vanilla ones fucking suck
Elaborate on every part of this.
>>
Is there a message setting for the game to slap me in the face if my parliament measure is about to fail? My useless pea brain keeps forgetting.
>>
>>2377994
>and that's mainly because they decided the sex ratio should be 1:7 for some retarded feminist reason
But it's not. You're just too stupid to understand statistics so when you inevitably end up flipping heads 3 times in a row one generation you think it's a bug and not just expected distribution.
>>
Historical dynasties should get a fertility boost.
The starting ruler of Austria had 6 kids, in game more than 4 by one wife is almost unheard of.
>>
Dynasty system in general is retarded.
There is no genetic inheritance of stats, so two 100/100/100 characters have the same kids as two 0/0/0 characters.
Also the PU minigame is deeply unsatisfying to play. "Unified succession law" doesn't automatically unify it, it just gives the senior partner the ability to ask junior partners to change their succession law to match theirs, but they can freely refuse with no consequences and you have no ability to challenge them on this.
>>
>>2378000
Paradox was lazy as shit and your best outcome as a culture in America is they found a 19th century treaty to copy names off and your worst outcome is they copied them off a literal "native american names for your novel" list
And that's not even getting into the middle grounds where they reused names for different languages (Blackfoot, Cheyenne, and Arapaho all have the same names) or they broke them when they added them (Dakota names are fucked because they included names like Sitting Bull as two separate names so you can be Sitting or a Bull but not a Sitting Bull)
>>
>>2378013
>they included names like Sitting Bull as two separate names so you can be Sitting or a Bull but not a Sitting Bull)
I don't know where to begin with criticizing this.
1. No dev time should have been devoted to this when core parts of the game are still broken.
2. How stupid do you have to be not to know to use an underscore? I don't mod, code, or anything and even I know this through sheer osmosis. How are these people getting paid to do this as their main job that they (supposedly) studied for?
>>
worthless nomadic tribes should not be represented at all, especially not as a relevant tag
>>
>>2378015
I wouldn't be surprised if the names were copied from EU4 and zero dev time was spent on them honestly, if you look through some of the name lists they flat out comment that they copied them from CKII
>How stupid do you have to be not to know to use an underscore? I don't mod, code, or anything and even I know this through sheer osmosis. How are these people getting paid to do this as their main job that they (supposedly) studied for?
If the rest of the game is coded like the name stuff I can see why its a mess. They have setup for a diminutive name system that literally does nothing in game. I don't know if I should raise it as a bug or if it's just something else they gave up on
>>
>>2378021
>They have setup for a diminutive name system
Charles II gets forced to abdicate and becomes Chuck jr.
>>
>>2378015
>1. No dev time should have been devoted to this when core parts of the game are still broken.
I don't think the guys who write namelists in a localization doc are the same as the ones doing the actual programming.
>>
>>2378022
No Chuck, but you can be Dick (if it fucking worked)
>>
>>2378002
There's a mod that does this. Gives you a pause popup if measure is about to fail. Once again johan being a fucking retard didn't implement this bare minimum QoL feature
>>
>>2377929
You can't if Calvin didn't spawn and create calvinism. You can get events that spawn calvinist preachers in your provinces, and pops will convert to calvinism, but if Calvin never was born you will not be able to convert to it, because it "has not been conceived of"
>>
>>2377999
Has AI ever enforced war goal for succession war for you? In my games when it does declare with this wargoal they just pease out for war reps and/or provinces
Also you can get this wargoal even if the guy/gal you, supposedly want to take the throne, currently rules the nation you are attacking
>>
>>2377777
nice quints
>>2377785
devs really need to address this 1 province vassal swarm meta shit.
>>
back then
>VIC 3 IS DEAD. EU V WON. LOOK AT THE PLAYER COUNT
now
>euv player count is close to vic 3s
its time to apologize to jonah
>>
>>2378097
>jonah
FUCK I MEANT WIZ
>>
>>2378086
>devs really need to address this 1 province vassal swarm meta shit.
Why and how? It's a solution that comes to the intersection of 3 issues:
-the worthlessness of conquered land and bottleneck of court wizards
-the inefficiency of large vassals due to the IA prioritizing different things than the player (or simply being bad)
-The calculation for annexation speed which rewards the size difference between you and your vassal, meaning 50 1-province vassals is faster to annex (if more diplomat intensive) than 1 50-province vassal.
>>
>>2377306
Based it true.
Tribal/migrating nations always got shafted in EU4.
>>
>reformation preachers convert jewsish pops
Every day I am more and more convinced Johan is antisemitic
>>
>>2378097
Vicky 3 at least has a coherent vision of what the game is supposed to be, even if things like the army mechanics are retarded.
EU5 is just totally schizophrenic.
>>
>>2378153
Thing is showing the jewish ability to resist conversion can also be seen as such, there's no winning
>>
this game is tarded
i've got 200 levies and yet i've got a vassal with 3000 that's loyal
>>
>>2377940
What region has better playability than Europe?
>>
>>2378158
Judaism blocks assimilation before conversion. But since there is possive conversion and ai sees 50 jews in their capital province as a national priority threat and puts wizard to convert its useless
>>
>>2378157
so you are telling me its time to apologize to wiz?
>>
>>2378191
>ai sees 50 jews in their capital province as a national priority threat
As well it should.
>>
>>2377674
eu4 is unironically more in line with what you want since in eu5 every troop is essentially identical unlike eu4 where different regions have different pips
>>
>>2377674
holy schizo
>>
>>2378204
They really do need to put troops into different regions.
Kind of stupid that sub saharan Africa troops are exactly the same as European troops.
>>
>>2378211
why wouldn't they be the same though?
In a fantasy scenario where Mali or Songhai kept up technologically with the west, they would be using the same tactics and similar armaments. The troop differences exist because of cultural and technological differences, and westernization eliminates those differences. Strategically, a Siphai is no different from other western cavalry like dragoons or lancers nor is a Janissary strategically any different from a career soldier.
A Benin soldier would fire a musket the same as another other soldier, yes they may have some cultural markings or sidearms but at the end of the day they fire a musket all the same.
>>
>>2378157
>Vicky 3 at least has a coherent vision of what the game is supposed to be
Does it?
It started off as a Marxist interpretation of history, with an autarkic planned economy the optimal playstyle, then with charters of commerce and the market system suddenly spamming trade centers and becoming laissez-faire was the winning playstyle, it started off being purely simulationist with every country playing the same as the design vision, then gradually they started customizing each country (Austria DLC, Spain DLC, now Japan DLC), they initially said the military system wouldn't use individual units because that wasn't the point of the game, now they're adding individual ship units with plans to add individual army units later down the line.

If any game can claim to have less of a coherent vision than EU5 it's Victoria 3.
>>
>>2378231
>individual army units later down the line.
wait, does this mean the combat system will become good?
>>
>>2378228
Even with modern tech two different societies on opposite ends of the earth are going to use that tech different ways.
In eu4 this was represented by different regions having different regiment types.
>>
What's the way to go to unify very fractured regions like Italy? Decentralizemaxx and vassalize everyone and then go fully centralized after annexing my vassals?
>>
>>2378238
you can unify the italian culture as literaly so no need for culture changing vassals
depending on do you wanna go vasals or not doesnt matter
>>
>>2377306
>the expansion pack was abo shit
kek
fuck, I should've known the mystery box-esque season pass would be a scam
>>
>>2378228
>why wouldn't they be the same though
>In a fantasy scenario where Mali or Songhai kept up technologically with the west, they would be using the same tactics and similar armaments.
in eu5 they are identical immediately and not after a campaign of successful nationbuilding and research
also at numerous points in history nations have had similar or identical technology and have had entirely different battlefield outcomes due to cultural/doctrinal differences, so the argument that a successful mali should be identical to prussia or qing doesnt make sense
different cultures employ different militaries and tactucs based on historical, cultural, economic and even racial/ethnic considerations and reasons.
there isnt a valid justification for a random indian tag in 1400 to have identical troops to a native australian tag or a german hre minor
>>
>>2377306
>valiant maori

LOL how?
>>
>>2377306
powerful, I look forward to creating an abbo empire
what the actual fuck are these worthless spaniards even doing?
>>
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>>2378256
You can unify culture groups?!
I am 150+ hours in and I have never heard of this one.
Where's the option? It's not on the culture tab.
>>
>>2378231
In a way it's true?
The optimal playstyle change happened because the previous state was retarded, you can't look at the 19th century and conclude "oh yeah, clearly the path to wealth is autarky and central planning"
Customized mechanics for countries is a pure business decision, you have to sell DLC, and the easiest path to that is country-focused content (with the caveat that Vic3's country content is garbage compared to EU4 and HOI4 focus trees, and that's...something). A game could have a perfect vision, it won't survive the DLC onslaught.
As for armies, it's paradox slowly coping that either their vision was shit, or it was simply so badly implemented it's easier to go back to the tested toy soldiers than to actually remake it into a functionning feature. Again, it's not an argument against the vision of the game, mostly how badly managed it is.
>>
>>2378294
He means it's meaningless to cuture convert other italian culture provinces, you are basically 100% guaranteed to have culure capacity for them even without advances
Unify culture is an advance in age of revolutions, the end of the game... It assimilates "some" of your pops into new superculture, while you need to manually assimilate others. Also cultural opinion doesn't carry over, so by doing that you can go over culture limit if you were improving cultural opinion for cultures in your empire
>>
>>2377712
in the united states of america in 2026, the primary culture is only about 2% of the population
>>
>>2378322
Jewish is not the primary culture of america.
>>
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>play milan
>get event to become monarchy
>nothing happens because there hasn't been an emperor for 15 years
>>
>>2378308
>you can't look at the 19th century and conclude "oh yeah, clearly the path to wealth is autarky and central planning"
and yet russia advanced more between 1922-1936 than from peter the great to 1917
curious
>>
>>2378327
How do you fucks always get these insanely long power struggles in the HRE?
I've played Italians tons of times and the longest power struggle in the HRE I've ever had was like 1 year.
>>
>>2378325
Old school WASP are though, and those only exist in New England.
>>
>>2378331
WAS is redundant, and only heretics are protestant.
And before you say Catholic, they are heretics too
>>
>>2378325
check out candia (crete) in eu5
see how they have a tiny venetian catholic minority primary culture ruling over a greek orthodox majority?
that's exactly the relationship of the jews to the americans
>>
>>2378335
That's what it is NOW, but it didn't start out that way. Which is why the primary culture is not jewish.
>>
>>2378334
Upper class Englishmen were the founders of America and thus are the primary culture.
Southerners were descended from border reivers/Ulster-Scots and thus form their own distinct culture. The only true WASP exist in New England.
>>
>>2377712
There are plenty of those in history, they all just got conquered
>>
>>2378330
I don't even know. I think it's because every good emperor candidate goes conquering like crazy so the vote is split for too long.
>>
>>2378338
I realize that. I'm just saying White Anglo Saxon is redundant. And Prots are heretics.
The only true christians are Orthodox and Coptic.
>>
>>2378343
True, but "WASP" tends to specifically denote the upper-class boarding school type whites. Despite Southerners meeting all of the criteria, white, anglo-saxon, and protestant they're not generally who you think of when you hear the term.
>>
>>2378327
the amount of screenshots I've seen of people forming italy as signoria Milan instead of duchy Milan because they missed the event due to HRE power struggle is embarrassingly impressive.
I wonder how much of the code was outsourced to AI and jeets.
>>
>>2378377
Or it could just be that people want to remain a republic? They're objectively better from a gameplay, roleplay, and real life perspective.
>>
>>2378377
Milan can revert back to republic during amrosian republic disaster
But it’s tricky to trigger
>>
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>>2378377
I didn't get the Castillian civil war because the game did not fire the event.
Why? I don't know.
>>
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Lost 244K out of my 295K pops to the great pestilence.
>>
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>>2378390
Good, that's 51K left for the cotton RGOs
>>
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>>2378406
It's ok I'm mass breeding my girls
Already at back at 100K
>>
>>2377310
im so sick of revisionist tribal activists subverting history
around vic3 there was an alaskan sperg who insisted that every village and square mile of emptiness deserves it's own province and that colonizing alaska should be extremely difficult
>>
>>2378412
I think there is something to the notion of making colonizing more difficult, you can clearly see the adverse the ease of colonizing has on EU V, with africa basically scrambled by the 1600's, although I wouldn't say making more statelets that fight back be the solution.
>>
>>2378418
If anything colonization should be easier. I frequently see the Caribbean uncolonized in 1550.
>>
>>2378453
That's just cause the AI is wonky in deciding where to colonize likely prioritizing adjacent provinces and since they land on the continent first, they'll go for that, they colonize fast enough.
>>
>>2378328
Russia played catch-up to the rest of Europe, was doing fairly unremarkably at that, and all the while was under constant influx of delusional western investment, loans and help, which they constantly stole or didn't reimburse/pay in full.
>>
>>2378231
>It started off as a Marxist interpretation of history
It still is
>with an autarkic planned economy the optimal playstyle, then with charters of commerce and the market system suddenly spamming trade centers and becoming laissez-faire was the winning playstyle
This has nothing to do with whether or not the game remains historical materialist.
>it started off being purely simulationist with every country playing the same as the design vision, then gradually they started customizing each country (Austria DLC, Spain DLC, now Japan DLC)
As the other anon said this is just how paradox games work.
>they initially said the military system wouldn't use individual units because that wasn't the point of the game, now they're adding individual ship units with plans to add individual army units later down the line.
Yes, they've made changes but still the game's military systems are clearly not a priority compared to the economic and political ones, which was the original pitch.
>>
>>2378377
>I wonder how much of the code was outsourced to AI and jeets.
are we pretending that paradox games haven't always been bug-ridden now?
>>
>>2378475
>Yes, they've made changes but still the game's military systems are clearly not a priority compared to the economic and political ones, which was the original pitch.
Anon, its okay to admit that the Toy Solder chuds were right. They won. HOI4 style war system is the future.
>>
>>2378231
>with plans to add individual army units later down the line
Source pls
>>
>>2378489
HoI4 is shit.
>>
>>2378498
It's also a success for PDX
Line must go up
>>
monthly "does the HRE work yet" post
>>
>>2378507
Lol
You will get a nigger abbo dlc before HRE works
>>
Why is there only one tin ROG in Russia?
Is it so that Kiev can dominate Eastern Europe?
>>
>>2378406
Indians were terrible for slave labor.
That's why Europeans had to import Africans.
>>
do you enforce culture first or enforce religion?
my gut says religion for the opinion bonus but most people say culture
>>
>>2378516
The bonus opinion for same religion is very good, yeah. It's a huge swing because it also removes the opinion malus of being the wrong religion. It's much faster to flip religion than culture, even if your values are reducing religious conversion, so if the goal is to annex the vassal ASAP I think you should do culture first. That's how I manage my eternal late-game swarm of 100+ OPMs. But early on when you don't have the tech/eco to quickly make good use of their land, and when a disloyal vassal may actually be an inconvenience, take it slow and do religion first.

>>2378507
They cranked up the antagonism you get inside the HRE, and large countries are far more liable to join the independence movements of tiny ratfuck vassals right now. I've been trying some Very hard/Very hard/High aggression Brandenburg runs, the latest one ended after I did one war, took three OPM vassals, then a decade later England joins one's independence movement and marched 20,000 levies through Germany for them. If you're playing Bohemia or Austria maybe antagonism is still just a number because you're rich enough to hire. Many people saying eventually the HREmp dies and it goes decades without electing a new one. Like 50+, 70+ years. Two Sicilies eating the Papal States every game fucks with Wars of Religion, and more. The pope not existing is a big issue for all of Europe. At least we'll be able to pray to Zeus soon, I guess.
>>
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how are you supposed to deal with timmy?
he's about to completely fuck my hormuz run
>>
>>2378524
Bro that's crazy, normally Timmy does fuck all. You got crazy raped by RNG.
>>
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>>2378525
after three months, i can buy him off, and he only ate two of my vassals
>>
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he's going apeshit, but i know how to stop him
>>
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i'm going to close the strait of hormuz
>>
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>>2378545
anon open the straight right fucking now
>>
>>2378545
STOP RIGHT NOW
>>
>>2377726
Chinks couldn't settle manchuria and had to wear cuck ponytails until dynasty was gone
Saying Qing was chinese is just a chink cope
>>
>>2378525
>>2378531
Ormuz gets free money and mercs BTFO everything that touches them.
>>
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HE LITERALLY INVADED THE DONBASS WHAT THE FUCK
>>
>>2378567
alt time line where Timur larps as Genghis Khan way fucking harder
>>
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>>2378568
he literally ate 60% of the ilkhanate and it's 1378
>>
>>2378567
based Timmy
>>
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rip timmy
he went to war with me three times and peaced out for reparations and a sound toll exemption every time
>>
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his kid is 7 years old and retarded
>>
>>2377310
It is accurately showing just how little control over the continent the British actually had circa 1836. No other centralized nation was contesting them for it (or really could at the time), but that was because of the British navy. Well navies don't mean anything in terms of a land presence.
>>
Now that the dust has settled, can we all agree the anti-railroading fucks are the reason EU5 is in the state it is currently? Literally most of my major problems with the game are solved with a handful of railroading and Eurocentric mods.
>>
>>2377363
>amerindians
>bronze
they didn't even make it that far



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