donkey edition
>Labour to announce implement HUGE benefit rises of 500% - but only for pakis>Keir Starmer: This is the morally correct decision
poo
I'M THE START OF THE SHOWKNEEL BEFORE ME
this morning's bedtime kinohttps://youtu.be/IdTDr0VH1aU?si=mTdvG8NeCsUVl_wW
he was like>oh this one is mint i'm gonna save that for the new
>>196462153
Where are you kraveanon? I know you've got something to admit to me
>>196462175and he had a typo
do you enjoy going to cafes?getting a latte in the morning?
got called toxic in willys
Had a dream that his majesty was having a beer with me at my place and then he started going through my book collection and going on about how shit it is.
>>196462153announcing implement are they
>>196462175
>>196462121It's completely worth mentioningYou don't have to vote for either
>>196462192Occasionally on my virgin walks about the town I will stop in for a coffee then sit there for a few hours.
Got the miso soup on
>>196462192I do in factvery good cafe culture here
/Brit/ is my toybox and you're all my dolls
>>196462192YeahPrefer a cappuccino in the morning
>BREAKING: Spain will be QUARANTINED by the LAbour goverment, should they win the General Election>Starmer: We heard they've got Spainnonce germs
>>196462241all me
>>196462220What boots are those?
business idea: euthanasia but you get to choose your own mode of deathI'd like to get blown to bits with C4
>>196462200sounds like something he'd do
>>196462225I hate all that gook shit
Memory of the first time I had a cappuccino in a shopping centre that's now being ripped down
>>196462220Penis POV?
just made this psot
>>196462243do you get it with the choccy powder
>>196462259reckon you can diy suicide at any time mate
>>196462220getting the ick imagining you posing your legs for this pic in the most nonchalant seeming way, taking a couple of pics and looking at them, rearranging the cup and twisting your feet a little and going back to take another
>>196462262Lovely stuff
>>196462257These but they don't make them in black anymore, just had a look:https://www.panamajackshop.com/uk/en/man/gael-c9Also they don't ship to the UK anymore since brexit so you may in fact have a very hard time getting these boots.
>BREAKING: Labour have just announced a statue of Mahatma Ghandi to be erected outside Wemblet>Starmer: His sacrifice made the world a better place for the most important people, pakis
>>196462274condolences to you for your lost shopping centre
>>196462303Thought the same thing honestly lad, he seems like a creep, grim
had a dream i was playing for a good spanish football teamremember saying to the manager that i'm shite but i can run about a lot
>>196462259Bike helmet filled with high explosiveIf you did it right the blastwave would be faster than any nerve signal
>>196462303holy projecto batman!
mental how weebl's stuff is still making videos in 2024
>>196462214this might come as a great shock to you but there's only two parties that will ever win and nothing will ever change that because half the country can't even be arsed to vote
>>196462316>Mahatma Ghandi to be erected outside Wemblethe was also erect in your mum's bed back in the day
He’s replying to himself again
>>196462340had a dream with snoop dogg in it the other day
>>196462303kek i get the same vibe, made me cringe ngl
>Labour have just discovered oil inside a pakis arse>Starmer: I'll drill into it myself
>>196462285Of courseSometimes an italian biscuit
>>196462303Got to consider the composition.
>>196462249watched this all the time as a kid, Lois was hot
>>196462380ok this one wasn't bad tbf
Top 30 British expressions:1. Right, what’s all this then?2. Don’t get your knickers in a twist 3. All gone pear-shaped 4. I’m in a bit of a pickle 5. It’s not my cup of tea 6. I’m chuffed to bits 7. I’m full of beans 8. Happy as Larry 9. What a load of… 10. He’s off his trolley 11. On your bike, mate 12. Absolutely trolleyed 13. It’s the bee’s knees 14. Bob’s your uncle 15. Knackered / cream-crackered16. It never rains but it pours17. It is what it is 18. Off you trot 19. Living the dream20. Have a good one 21. Lovely jubbly 22. I was stood/sat there, right, and…23. Wind your neck in 24. Right, we’d better make a move 25. Bloody hell 26. Oi oi!27. I beg your pardon 28. Sorry about all this 29. Blimey / Crikey 30. I’ll put the kettle on
took the day off for my birthday. watching frasier in bed with a cup of tea. might fry a few eggs in a bit. living the dream.
>>196462363Yeah, so? Doesn't mean you have to vote for either
>>196462381good ladyou know when you order a cappucino in america they don't give you the choccy powderit's madness
>>196462415How many eggs?
>BREAKING: Pakis discovered on the moon>Starmer: Today I am pleased to announce the UK finally will have a space program
>>196462396She was spectacular
>>196462415>eggswhat are you going to have with them lad?
Crazy how fucking fit they are at that age
>>196462415happy birthday mate, good to look after yourself like that. Have a good one
no bread in might go to a cafe and get a pastry and coffee
>>196462433i'm thinking three
>>196462450the age in question?
>>196462420no but if I don't vote for either I might as well not vote at all
>>196462415Yooouuu and tony egg again
Never in my life have I had one of those fancy Starbucks coffees filled with sugar syrup and all that. None of your mappa frappa vanilla mochachinos for me; there's nothing wrong with a normal white coffee. These dessert coffees contain like 50g sugar a pop as well.
Got back acne
anyway thats my labour gimmick! hope youve all enjoyed yourselds
>>196462450sending this to the manager of the nursing home that you work at
on the train
>>196462439got some nice sausages in the fridge
>>196462492based
>>196462461Birthday lad? I'm thinking 4+
>>196462415TOSSED SALAD AND SCRAMBLED EGGSSSSSS
jaundiced mf
>>196462409Love 22
might try sending my undwear cleaning bill to Xhamster
>>196462482i get black coffee medon't care for coffee but developed the taste for black coffee cos uni exams back in the dayit's one of those things
>15 years agofuck this has unlocked a whole bunch of memories, the 'random humour' erahttps://youtu.be/JtLMzIOlmbs?list=PL7C82E21EF966730F
10AM and this cunt's still in bedday is nearly over. You've wasted your day off. The morrow's toil already looming like a loud foghorn.
>>196462468Frees up some time doesn't it?
>>196462482the only one I've ever enjoyed is the eggnog one, besides that it's just a straight latte for me
*slaps hands down on knees*Right, I'm off
>>196462541LOlTHIS IS ME
>>196462482for me it’s instant coffee with a dash of milk
>>196462492cut your nails you freak
>>196462497sausages and eggs? that's what I shoulda had
>>196462512QUITE STYLISH
>>196462492>>196462510samesies
got called gay
Can't imagine being arsed to vote
Perfectly beautiful missus upstairs yet I just wanted to jessy Dubai nailing a guy and a girl at the same time. What am I like aha
Mhhhm heated up adrenaline bean juice
>>196462575lovely rendition of the New Trainers gimmick thereyou saw the opportunity in the wild and went for it. Excellent stuff. Organic.
>>196462415I used to do this but it got boring so now I just work on my birthday and don't even tell any colleagues
>>196462575ermpalthoseareyourshoes
>>196462583a bizarre larper
I want a divorce /brit/You've changed
>>196462583porn sick moid soon you’ll troon out
>>196462575adam looking fresh
>>196462560Scandis aren't human
>>196462249>cream 4 sugarswhy are they like this
>>196462577in wimpy?
>>196462524Taylor writing songs about how this will never be her because she knows she's ruined any chance for real love and will probably die from an overdose of the prescription drugs she's been given so she can stand up straight without fainting as she tours in support of her 50th anniversary compilation
>>196462609bizarre news story
>>196462579I usually wander in slightly drunk about 10 minutes before voting closes and scribble a cock on a ballot
>Been off the toil all week>gone to spoons every day at 11am and come home drunk at 5pmDoing the same today
Morning de lads. Going to dentist soon to get a cap/crown fitted on my tooth. On a 12 hour fast too so no eating until 13:00pm
>>196462629
>On May 5, 1945, six civilians were killed near Bly, Oregon, when they discovered one of the balloon bombs in Fremont National Forest, becoming the only fatalities from Axis action in the continental U.S. during the war.[50][51] Reverend Archie Mitchell and his pregnant wife Elsie (age 26) drove up Gearhart Mountain that day with five of their Sunday school students for a picnic. While Archie was parking the car, Elsie and the children discovered a balloon and carriage, loaded with an anti-personnel bomb, on the ground. A large explosion occurred; the four boys (Edward Engen, 13; Jay Gifford, 13; Dick Patzke, 14; and Sherman Shoemaker, 11) were killed instantly, while Elsie and Joan Patzke (13) died from their wounds shortly afterwards.[52] An Army investigation concluded that the bomb had likely been kicked or dropped, and that it had lain undisturbed for about one month before the incident.[28] The U.S. press blackout was lifted on May 22 so the public could be warned of the balloon threat.
scraaaaaaaaaaaaan
>>196462620just don’t care, want my reggo each morning
>>196462636how indescribably grim for you
This is a UKF exclusive
>>196462579*gives you a $20 fine*
>>196462677looks like thick cold poo
>>196462648>big titted whore with hundreds of acres of land mad that children want to play on it
>>196462677bloody hell
>>196462677They really are disgusting animals
There are no straight lines.It's a commentary on technology and how it is designed.What is it saying.
>>1964626772 please
>>196462677Fucking hellHow much does this cost?
once at uni I decided to get a coffee before a lecture despite having already had my morning coffee with breakfastthen I sat in my lecture absolutely gakked like sweating, having palpitations and feeling extremely agitated. Swear she must have put a pinch of speed in that coffee because never before or since has simply having 2 coffees caused that reaction
>>196462648I'd love to irrigate her garden
16 and completely bald still
Got a burger for dinner from a fish and chip shopDo you get those at your chippie?
>>196462729haha mental
>>196462677seen this many times, only just noticed 263g of sugar. how is that even legal
>>196462729gayboy
>>196462648Article doesn't mention the fact that she's 10 feet tall and in a Oscar Wilde short story
>>196462636that's so grim
>>196462757Where, in America?
me?voted for the 'ip in 2015reason was that my seat was a safe tory seatso it was a protest vote, or more - a vote so let em know i'm FULLY pakis outthen? leave.then? nowt.then?nowt AGAINreason was tories were gonna win them ennitbut then?i mean, but next?it's gonna be reform for meas they wont win but i wont vote labour and tory? PAH! neveryep. i think it's safe to say i'm based as anythjign
>>196462745sexoooooo
going to a normscum engagement party tomorrow
tryin' to get some piei don't carewhat's inside ithttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXJrnkwRv64&list=PL7C82E21EF966730F&index=44
>seasideMARK ordered a new PlayStation 5 from EE>Box comes unsealedHe's absolutely fuming. He paid for a new product. It should be new.
>>196462768Good lad
Summer just won’t fucking arrive, almost May and the trees haven’t even begun sprouting buds yetGrim life
job interview next week and I just know I'll get the job because I'm very intelligent and good at interviewing but I don't want the job I don't want to have to work again arghhhhh FUCK WORK
>>196462757Don't creme eggs have like 10 spoons of sugar in them?
after years of careful examination I've come to the realisation that jutting, conically-shaped breasts, colloquially known as "rocket" or "torpedo" breasts, are the most aesthetically pleasing and therefore best breast shape regardless of size
*does a gay porn dance*
>The power-sharing deal between the SNP and Greens in Scotland has collapsedIt has begun
>>196462812Feel that la, only reason I've put off applying is I know I'll get a job I don't want
>>196462787>unsealed PS5 on the 2nd hand market30% chance it's one that he has personally owned before.
>>196462812Better to have money mate.
brapped fanny is BACKsorry, i mean he's ACK
this is my world today
>>196462829Give us some examples lad
>>196462807Consensual sex with Anya Taylor-Joy. Cuddling and kissing an Anya Taylor-Joy girlfriend.
Would let shamima begum peg me lol
>>19646281526g apparently, so about 6 spoons. A lot mind you, but that drink is 10 times that
>>196462807where's this pic of her fromshe's not usually dressed so lushly
>>196462873
hit the road, rorkeand don't you come backno more, no more, no more, no more
>>196462876creme eggs are pretty smallthat drink really quite large
alright I'm off then lads
>>196462917somewhere in nature innitcan tell from the waterfall and trees
>>196462928see you in a bit lad x
>>196462860this is my world every day
'lo /brit/
>>196462812same, it’s a weekend-toil situation for me since i got me tradie course coming up in may
>>196462926Well done mate
>>196462969Brixton?
I LIKE BUKKAKE
>>196462997government should give me this star at the end of everyday if they want me to toil
>>196462865classic example would be Danni Ashe. A British examples that springs to mind would be Samantha Fox
>>196462997For me it was these
>>196462872why did she have to fucking ruin herself with surgery, she hadn't even hit the wall yet and she decided to speed up the process
tummy's rumblyweather's shitdidn't sleep wellall good omens for my interview later
>>196462926people don't just eat 10 creme eggs in one go, that drink however was designed to be consumed in one sitting
>>196463069Hope you shit yourself and then pass out shivering
hit the road, blacksand don't you come back
Mumberg is critical of my decision to get a crown too.
on the bus with me cheeky day saver
>>196463069hope all goes well
so i'll fight for trans rights
>>196463095Isn't a crown more expensive than a filling?
>>196463076>people don't just eat 10 creme eggs in one go
trans rights are mental health rights
>>196463069feel like interviews goes better if you’re in slight discomfort for me, not sure why
>>196463096smoke da reefa in di cornaaa
>>196463069Buddy, listen, there’s really nothing to worry about. Just don’t fuck up.
>>196463117...yhI have to stop this. I will have to say I'm not comfortable with a crown.
i'm bringing pastry back (yeah!)when I transport it I like to wear a hat (why?)I'm not too sure, but it don't look whack (word)where we going to hide it to protect from attack? (hmmm)Take it to the fridge!
>>196463095My mum is always going on about how dentists tell you you need stuff that you don't actually need because "they want to make money off you".Erm mum I'm an NHS patient and pay like £40 at the dentist I'm quite sure they make a loss on me and just want what's best. Also dentists make like £80,000 a year I'm quite sure they're OK for money.
was it Lord Davo who used to say he'd skip the toilet before a meeting so he was working on a full bladder?
>>196463119mate even a fatty would struggle, the sickly intensity of the sugar would just make you start to feel nauseated by the fifth one
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uja3W-ibifcis this the best youtube video EVER?
>>196463119we're all rooting for you on your weight loss journey mate
>>196463166SCREAMING
>>196463108
>>196463184not watched it but i doubt it
im bringing gay porn backkkk
>>196463119not me though, I hope you get one stuck in your windpipe and die
They don't look like they people to fight for them.
>>196463179he said it about big decisions iirc>>196463201needless, then, for you to have replied
>>196463196To trannards really get rape threats or is that just their fantasies at play
showertoil looms
>>196463184>18 years ago
just not gonna support any company that uses vertical videos in their advertisements, nor, trap beats as their choice of music fucking sick to death of it
>>196463179In some surgeries the surgeons will fill up the patient's bladder with fluid so it inflates like a balloon. It apparently makes the surgery easier and safer.Learned this from the TV program The Knick (great show) when they were trying to perfect a safe method of cesarean section but the patients kept dying on the table. In the end the bladder inflation was the trick.There's also a treatment for bladder cancer where instead of injecting / swallowing the medication they just fill up your bladder with it. Dunno why I have so many facts about bladders but there you go, hope you enjoyed them.
*breathily over the phone*I wouldn't even rape you with your dick, you freak
Gonna have a bath to calm down my piles. Got grapes grown out me arse. Hurts to wipe.
>>196463282Thankyou, singular bladder poster
if a tranny is getting loads of shit for being a tranny and can't go anywhere cos they're a tranny couldn't they just take their dress and makeup off and be fine
>>196463323bladdley poster
MoOoOo
>>196463336pffffahahaha
posted it again award
I don’t mind trannies if they look like picrel and make the effort. Blokes in a dress need to just die
>>196463184Police warn public to not approach man wanted for attacking somebody with a firearmKevin McAteer, 25, is wanted by police following a gun attack in Salford
sam fox did have rather lovely boobs to be fair but my heart will always belong to donna ewin
Hawaiian flag looks quite nice
>>196463364damn you could tell from his rap he was about that life
>>196463365AWOOGAthat's somebody's mom now
>>196463354mate that looks like sean bean in a wig
>>196463333just deinflate the tits I guess, reverse the surgeries, easy
Two raw eggs down the gullet
Boomers and women don't know what a browser is. They just use a different app for every possible website they want to use, so their phones end up having 70 apps with notifications that ring every 30 seconds.
>8C in the sunnot on is it really it was 15C yesterday fuck off
>>196463412this is true for old people and zoomers, I don't think it's a gender thing
>>196463412>They just use a different app for every possible website they want to usethey call this the unix philosophy
>>196463385It's the iconic "whoa there matey, this here's a professional port, we've got a knock-off East India Company flag and everything" flag
>>196463428bloody freezing
guns don't kill people, brappers dofarting out me bumtoot toot toot
>>196463399Don't be a cunt
Do you use an umbrella or a hooded jacket when it’s raining?
is it even possible to scromit
>>196463475yes
>>196463475neither cos im not a pussio
>>196463476Jimi Hendrix did it once
>>196463428spring is fucked
i'm making u itch ur head
>>196463475not chinese or bent so i don’t use umbrellas
>>196463412Mumberg asked for help once, said no websites were working for her. Asked her to show me and she loaded up a page, tried clicking around and nothing was happening.She was trying to click through the 'Agree to cookies' overlay at the bottom of the page. She didn't understand that she had to click Agree / Reject first. Bear in mind this was a good 2-3 years after all this cookie agreement shite came about. I was genuinely annoyed at her stupidity and respected her less for the incident.
>>196463441aha well said
>>196463489goodness me they must shagthe guy on the right is like a buff supermanridiculous
>>196463489Without forced perspective
>>196463506scuse me, while I scream and die
>>196463519in fairness to your mum that is horrific web design
the life plan?step 1. get a job as a brickiestep 2. fuck up my back doing work as an aforementioned brickiestep 3. get on the disability pensionstep 4. retire to the philippines with a local woman of questionable repute
thing they don't tell you about the weather in their little numbers C is that it's windy as fuck all the time
didn't realise that like all the "iconic" saltburn shit happens in the last 30 minuteswhat a meh film
>>196463536how many could you take
>>196463539kek
>>196463536go back to japan chang
>>196463489Mad how Australia is a nation of deanos with access to year-round bbqs
mad that I went this long without buying a pass, I can shitpost like mad nowwahey look at me go
>>196463545interesting
>>196463519mine woke me up once in a panic as she thought she'd accidentally clicked x and lost her email forever but outlook saves as a draft with every keystroke
Got some nice burgers from the butchers, some cheese and relish.Absolutely STARVING right now and could scran 4 of those cunts easily but you can't have a burger at 10.30amIt isn't right, not in my name
>>196463562what, even the bit where he's spinning about with his knob out?
without any warning at all I'm suddenly a fat bastard
hi brit
>>196463599yes that's the final scene lol
>>196463579the deano phenomena is just yet another strong cultural tie between our two great nations
>>196463536Said this the last time this was posted too but 3 of the western lads are definitely on gear. The others possibly but it's not certain.Most of the asians look natty.
>>196463604Hi mate
Hendrix's All Along the Watchtower absolutely destroys Bob Dylan's
>>196463568The two women, maybe
>>196463545replace "brickie" with carpet fitter and you've just described my uncle lmao
ahrfohoorv drpee iseor oeynt
>>196463598why the fuck did you buy radishes
>>196463604hello
>>196463614nobody cares noodle man
Our Deanos have less entry level merc saloons and more jet skis
The Sopranos is only good when you watch it as clips on Youtube
>>196463616>>196463641hi friends
>>196463598You should look at the bottom of the stack of meat buddy. At the very bottom of the pile there's always one weighted 6.66 ounces. He puts them there I think. Let me know if you discover it at yours too. Because I can't visit all the town's, my body has gotten too sick to continue my research into the simulation. My fatigue as a result of a life without sex has made me severely suicidal.
australia doesnt have deanos
witnessing someone being disrespectful of other culturesyou hate to see it you really do
>I Know That My Younger Sister, A Junior High School Graduate Who Has Been Living As A Shut-in In A Dirty Room For 7 Years, Had Her First Experience With Me While I Was Asleep, And Has Since Then Continued To Satisfy Her Sexual Desires By Having Sex With Me At Night (without Contraceptives)well that's tonights wank sorted
>>196463618Submitted without commenthttps://youtube.com/watch?v=L3xpmfJp0Xc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jCcNbrrxEEYmark got another PS5 after selling it ~2 months ago so get in
>>196463662
anyone here has sciatica how the fuck do you get rid of it I’m not fat or old is it even worth going to the doctors
rorke doing a trans ahhhh dance
>>196463684why did blud do that
>>196463684don't watch lads it's not worth it
>>196463670presumably because in Aus you can get paid like 100 grand to drive diggers in the Pilabara desert, actually affording a decent lifehere the wages are capped at like 28k
said this before but even with our tradie deanos aside there's plenty of actual english deanos here as well anyway
>>196463722How do you know you have it if you haven't been to the doctor
>>196463760my deano mate went to aus for a year abroad at uni and thought he was gonna be the talk to the country with his accent but it turned out they were all like "oh yer english mate got tons a muckers loike that" and that was that
Rorke wanking to Zendaya's new movie
do a trans porn dance
>>196463793look I'm not gonna sit here and pretend those webms weren't arousing
>>196463793she’s mid af
>>196463793feel like bwc has been gaining a lot of power and influence lately
>>196463792ahaha yeah feel like half of london's here working in advertising and recruitment
lads can i get your opinions. how fucked am i?a few days ago i posted a korean news article onto the 'log. i literally just copied and pasted it and replaced some hangeul words with their chinese characters just to show what korean could look like if it used chinese characters.but now i'm potentially in trouble with janny and i'm scared. i messed up. since then my experiecne on this website has become significantly laggier and i received a warning from mr janny. i am scared, lads. can someone explain what the actual problem is with doing what i did please.
At dentist. Last minute thoughts on getting a dental crown?
>thye's mid ath fuck
Dadberg once told me we were going to move to Australia when I was about 2. He is an electrician and at the time the Aussie government was giving fast track citizenships to people with in-demand trades along with other benefits.They had all the paperwork completed and accepted then my mum bottled it at the last minute because she didn't want to be so far away from my grandparents.Stupid bitch.
>>196463868mentalliterally your ticket to paradise
>>196463855she’s not going to shag you mate enjoy your asian gf
>>196463868The alternative universe Bruce version of you laughing down the pub with his mates and his bird
>>196463868You have strong memories of age 2? Mad that
>>196463868>at the time the Aussie government was giving fast track citizenships to people with in-demand trades along with other benefits.just signed a bunch of new agreements with your govt after brexit so it's never too late for you aha
can't move the aus me as i got caught with a tiny bit of speed once and got cuationed
>>196463899enjoy your...your...
>>196463903ktim
>>196463868In every single one of these Wanted Down Under programs the life in Aus seems significantly better than the UK in every way.Always a laugh when the couple tallies up their salaries and it works out that they'll both be making significantly more money and even with a higher cost of living they'd end up with significantly more disposeable income per month too.If I had any actual skills like a medical degree I would be gone in an instant and I don't hold anything against the people who do go.
australia is boring and reddit imo
love my pintsif you tried to take my pints away from me i'd go mental
>>196463926Does that really block you
New>>196463904>>196463903>>196463903>>196463903>>196463903>>196463903
>>196463973>>196463973>>196463973
>>196463949don't even need skilled labour anymore tbf (as much), we've made it easier for you generally>>196463959rubbish
>>196463793she fucking another white guy in it?
>>196464222two