England edition
my brother in christ
>Arizona dad 'distracted by Playstation' as daughter, two, died inside hot car on 109F day
sex with kamala harris
>>199878130mad innit, they're like reverse king midas, whatever they touch turns to shitwhen yanks try and take part in a gimmick they often just turn it into a punchline without a joke to lead up to it, ignoring the context as to why a gimmick is funny in the first place. look at the cunt spamming them for no reason in the last thread, 300 million people and not an ounce of nuance amongst them
scran
yummy yummyin my tummy
on the bus, pondering the critique of my ankle socks
gagging for a cigarette
>>199878260fucking slut baring your ankles for any tom dick and harry out on the street to see
>>199878260Nice shoes
gagging for a cock
>>199878193was he playing elden ring? if so then i can't say i blame him
>>199878264sucking off the school bully behind the bike sheds again are you lad
>>199878264just had one me. lungberg not happy but brainstein content for a while
bumming a fag
>>199878249thought only old people liked these things, are you 60?
sucking on a gay porn cigarette
got convid again
>>199878301People with good taste, you mean?
when is bloodborne coming to PC
>>199878276xx>>199878280cheers, old pair of j.lindeberg them
liquorice is vile and anyone who likes it should be sectioned and heavily beaten
does this happen in middle England
Seems to never young Prime Minister trained on my computers.
>>199878340brown moment
wanking to pics of jk rowling
went to two shops the other day, in one shop the girl who served me was very polite and nice and in the other shop the girl was pretty curt with me, obviously one of them is happier with their life than the other
>>199878196>no more gesture politics
>>199878340red liquorice isn't bad
>>199878260>office clothes cuck>bus cuckWhat else?
Yeah?
>>199878347looks a bit like sean astin
@BBCnow: Starmer: Jimmy Saville was, and in way still is the Ghengis Khan of nonces, a great and true briton
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DmF-LsJptNktune
>>199878346ninja sarrrr?
>>199878370*dunks your head in a comically large glass of milk*
the prime day orders:>usb c cable (2m) £5>laptop charger (£24)>sterimar saline nasal spray 100ml (£5)>vitamin c (30 count, got some left from before) £3>zinc bisglycinate with copper (180 count) £8>probiotics (120 count, 2 months) £19
>>199878340yeah it's foul
>>199878348it comes from brown countries
got next week off work so thought fuck it and saw what holiday deals are on, off to cyprus on my jack jones for 5 days
>>199878294yep thats better
>>199878368>>office clothes cucknothing wrong with looking professional lad, if you ever, EVER, left that smelly bedroom of yours, you’d see why
>>199878406all pointless
Men's fashion is boring now. What went wrong.
>>199878443The charger and cable probably have a point These can be used to supply power to a device
gay arse rape
>>199878420can i come?
q qu aui uit dee it o
>>199878260where are you off to swedelad?
>>199878406you've just been scammed mate. prime day is a big scam to part fools from their money
>>199878461women
>>199878466rorke wont like this
cant think of anything less appealing than going away on your own, as a last resort i'd unironically find a slag on bumble to go on holiday with me before i went on my own
>>199878489so you'd rather just not go anywhere your whole life then? that seems worse than solo travelling
>>199878443my usb c cable has been absolutely fucked for months and i bent the usb c part of my laptop charger the other dayfurthermore, i struggle with regular stuffy nose issuesalso - those supplements are all scientifically proven to aid in various things scientifically so - clearly not>>199878475i needed all this stuff anyway and it was all cheaper than usual when i searched the price history so errrrrrrrrr not really?
>>199878473home, done with interviewtoilbit on the fence what to do about it, ceoberg said there are flexible solutions if i wanna start but don’t really feel like getting into sales again
>>199878420how much
>>199878489nowt wrong with solo travelsthink of it like this, sure sex is better than wanking but that doesn't mean there's anything wrong with a good wank
sir poo steaming
give poo
>>199878476Did they stop us from wearing hats
>>199878489>paying for some random slag you don't even know to go on holiday with you is better than going on your ownsort it out you mong
>>199878506id beat you within an inch of your life given the chance
>>199878461hugo boss isn't allowed to make nazi uniforms anymore
>>199878573you couldn't beat a drum
>>199878569never really stopped wearing hats, though, have we?
sir poos-a-lot
>>199878607It's not as common now.
girls with pooey arses
In this girls bed while she went to work just found her dirty kickers phwoar wank time
>>199878516700 quid flights hotel and transfer included
sup
>>199878566At this point I think you're the only man she hasn't had sex with
>>199878645those drain grates haven't changed at all
>>199878166https://youtu.be/KhevRy2tVDg?si=OQi1rc-er9u8h0K2This man is suffering for you
>>199878651tell your mum stop leaving dirty washing about
This is me btw
>>199878649CORRR>>199878686You've shagged her have you?
I love it when my mum goes to work because i get to sleep on her side of the bed
>>199878744Who is this fella I never thought to ask just thought it was some random poof
>>199878744sitting with my arm like this while phoneposting
>while phoneposting
what was the name of that one bird that was posted here from time to time. she used to get shit tattoos and complain about being poor
Forget Prime Day (actually 2 days), it's Diego Day tomorrow
chocolate rolo cowboy hats
Got the sprints done
>>199878725Haha waheeeyyyy lad done me there
Mum sent me this the other day. What did she mean by this?
Need a snacky-wack
>>199878406>usb c cable (2m) £5That's a deal is it? Can get them for 96p (2 metres) on AliExpress. Same exact Chink shite as well.
>>199878850What languages do you use
>>199878850Not me m8 I started running again and was dead after not even a mile yesterdayleg day anyway
Day 2 C25k complete
>>199878825Ribbons made from foreskins
>>199878869not exactly no. cables are way overpriced in the uk.>chinanot gonna sit here waiting a week for that to arrive am i
rat is short for ratthew
>>199878893How far did you run dickhead?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LCYKH0u07Eochoon
>>199878897well id assume you have to get up to piss
>>199878910looool done him
>>199878894those are twizzlersthe rims are pringles covered in chock
>>199878910papa poo guinea
>>199878910my commonwealth brvther....
>>199878910Dunno, hard to tell cos you alternate running and walkingTotal of 3.52km
papua new guinea be kidding me
>>199878904fucking hell, we've got bob mortimer in the thread
knob whoretimer
*oooo*
why the FUCK isnt weedbergowitz responding
>>199879023maybe try not being a junkie piece of shit
>>199878939Common... wealth...?Where the the fuck is our share of this common wealth? >>199878948>>199878936Poo K>>199878947>3.25kmPush harder dickhead
>>199879051maybe choke on my cock
>>199879053>Poo Kbritbros....
>>199879059doubt thats possible with your shrivelled little nub from drug abuse
>>1998790533.52km actually and no I'm happy with building gradually :]
>>199879053>Where the the fuck is our share of this common wealth? We will join (rejoin?) the UK to get that. Right, lads!
Did couch to 5k during lockdown and then injured a tendon in my knee on my first 5k, what am I like lol x
R-right, lads....
here we all are thenthe lads
we NEED to import more Bangladeshi deliveroo drivers, for the economy
the 'rit
>>199879140
>>199879161simply love this webm
get them wanked off
>>199879161Fucking hell lol
it is pint weather my lids
Might need to get lunch in early, I'm famished
>>199879189These horse pics got me SCREECHING
>>199879189roaring
>>199879195dangerous day to be a peroni
>>199879161I have a fear of standing behind these cunts and getting my skull crushed by one kick
It's too late to be hatefulThe European cannon is here
>>199879260Fucking bizarre post
>>199878816fatpheebs
get me wanked off
this is my wife
>>199879284wasn't expecting the cunt filming to be a tranny
>>199878816sara or something
*gets you wanked off*
>>199879284why do these assholes even get dogs when they know they're going to leave them at home alone all day suffering like thatwhat a fucking bitch
Been with the gf 8 years and cheating on her for the first time feel like a cunt but also selfishly want to keep doing it Anyone been in a similar situation?
>>199879348It is a bit bent to be fair
>>199879348>sounds gay, fuck that
>>199879354No. I'm happily married
Not sure how this helps, it's not hard to go online and copy a number of different examples and tailor them to present yourself. I mean doing that had nothing to do with diversity, if you can't do that you're thick as pigs shit and shouldn't be going to uni in the first place
>>199879284>Yeah I got a dachshund/chihuahua cross, it's basically mousenonce but a dog
>>199879354No but starting to consider itDunno what it is about toillasses but I just want to shag them silly despite them mostly being of equal or lesser attractiveness than girlfriendberg
>>199879417LOL
>>199879404Agreed, although to be fair I did put "I'M WHITE" in mine and secured an oxford interviee
>>199879348Maddison has more than a touch of the bender about him
>>199879465you know a lot about the touch of a bender do you?
>>199879284leaving an animal alone in a sterile apartment for 9 hours is cruel and abusive
>Maddithon hath more than a touch of the bender about him
>>199879477Yep. I'm a Chelsea fan so I know benders when I see them
That argentina chant is good banter tbf don't really see what was racist about it they were just spitting straight facts
a guy did get toalso questions and his video test everythingquestions quickly aim but deeply it's okay
Your lord.
>>199879498wahey
>>199879404i got into a decent uni with a btec purely off the back of my insanely good, literally young oscar wilde-esque personal statement
>>199879513That's not the King
A mate of mine keeps pronouncing the word ferment as flement.
send gray rabbits to thr primary school its "not" illegal and you can overhwlrm them and teach them to breed to get a hybrid chimera rabbit "human"
>>199879538Riveting stuff.
>>199879546you can't post that image mate
>>199879546Peters are prohibited.
>>199879509>don't really see what was racist about itPlayer apologised for it and admitted it was racist so ask him You're not busy Go find his agent's number, phone it, and get a statement
>>199879546i thought you were'nt peterposteryou're a lying scumbag
>>199879560The referendum we need
>>199879348he's right though. skin to skin contact is extremely important - but mostly for the woman-baby bond.
>mousenonce advocating for rabbits to shag primary school childrenthe grimmest cunt imaginable
>>199879546i have a box of these you can have for your wacky experiments
Changing my name to rabbit corrr
i need to go to the coop today "if" that security guard is not working and i can get energy drinks (three) And some yeast to mix with the cola i got last week
he's gone too dar this time
>>199879658Go to the bridge and jump off it, you junkie freak
>gone too dar
smoknig that hairy pooey gay arse fent pack
off the wankingoff the 'bisoff the boozeall vile muck
genuinely hanen't trimmed me nails in over 2 and a half months
Locked in the chinaman to despatch me one of his finest laptop batteriesWithin mere weeks I shall be much more mobile for much longer
>>199879746off the wanking and porn too, medon't smokebut will probably stay on the booze, i enjoy my friday and saturday night pints
canada is like australia but in reverse
significantly increasing my gay porn consumption for research purposes
>>199879746ktim since friday, but probably back on the lot tomorrow
Jarvis, look up all Co-ops in the Lanarkshire area.Great. Now, phone each one and ask if they have a problem with a certain individual stealing energy drinks.
Had a busy morming
>>199879809thats a lot of coops
>>199879821my grindr meetups
>>199879821what happened to number 5
>>199879821nonce behaviour
Lads... what in God's name did I just snotrocket out
>>199879419Just exciting innit?
Need my plums battered by a quick one-two from Emma Watson.
microwaving and then sucking an 'oxygen absorber' flavour sachet
reckon I would shag an elf if they were real
...gerards dead
Might have a quick cum
>>199879949just go to a hippy festival loads of girls roleplay as them
>>199879949uhh... nonce?
smile a big smile for me
>>199879951bullshit
>>199879949all elves have knobs
>>199878434Seething office clothes cuck. I get to wear whatever I want at work.
Do black men call black women n words?
>>199880005nah nigga means guy or dude
>>199879999What do you do
>>199880039So black women shouldn't get offended at the n word, should they
little cartberg
Don't think I'll be able to find another job on a similar pay lads.I worked my way up in my previous job (which was my first ever) to a fairly technical role without having a formal degree or qualification. I changed jobs at the start of this year thinking I'd have transferable skills, and I think I'm out of my depth.I'm fucking useless and will either have to accept something much lower paying or go back to the previous job.
>>199879951Mad I was about to do a >do you want to put your dick in the dobpost
gfberg has big boobs and a deep vagina
>>199880068give him a kiss from me x
>>199880068lil ngga was a viral star until he died
>>199880084what does her arsehole smell like?
Mad how it's literally impossible to enter a trade without knowing someone in one or being prodded towards it when you're in school.
>>199880070fuck off you annoying freak
>>199880070give it a rest
>>199880108Nothing is stopping you from buying the tools and the books and just building tings and selling them (not repair work)
>>199880070if you ever wonder why you're a friendless incel runt then this is the reason.
>>199880070Wow you moved job because of the better pay and it was more difficult and/or had more responsibility???? Who could have predicted this!?
>>199880138id stop him
>>199879951died of the flu? that is so gerard
>>199879821rorke imagining his body count if he transitioned
>>199880070>>199880176samefag kill yourself
Girl I’m seeing literally showed me a pic of her best mate fully naked yesterday what the fuck is wrong with girls. Did she not realise I would add that to the mental wank bank?
I don't get horny by porn or hentai anymore. Got into erotic stories last week, shit was awesome the first day but now I feel it's just porn 2 and I'll be bored soon.
peng girl farts
>>199880224She setting up a threesome?
i'm /brit/'s messi
>>199880176I thought I'd be able to handle it. It wasn't a huge leap, only 3k more. Also on the lowest rung same as before, so no management responsibility.
so he pinches little girls nipples on live television so what
>>199880307fuck off you annoying freak
got my full on knob out and someones just walked past teh window
>>199880269I agree
>>199880138That's not a trade, to do that professionally you need qualifications like City and Guilds.
>>199880283She did say if she’d ever do a threesome it’d be with her. But then also said she’d never do it I’d be too scared to have a threesome anyway don’t back myself enough to make 2 girls happy at the same time
>>199880335It was just a lad doing his daily incelwalking.
>>199880357Right, do that then
Need to get the charging socket on my phone fixed, the paki phone shop doesn't need my phone unlocked to do that do they?
>>199880357>That's not a tradeWell it is, just not an accredited one
>>199878260no brown in town
>>199879787hmm
>>199880410Might need it to test the data connection, dunno
>Rorke cooks you this for a breakfast datewyd ladies?
>>199880357Atleast you would figure out if you were capable that way
>>199880410No, that's hardware only.
>>199880410Nah just that it turns on. All phones have visual and audible indicators. He can also check for amp draw on a multimeter on the connector
Any shaggers here ever shagged anyone in a forest
>>199880461rum pink sasuage
no one here has an iphone
>>199880382Yeah I'm thinking about it.
>>199880457She is right.
sucking a slice of leerdammer
>>199880224she does the same thing in reverse, that mate has seen your knob. women are bizarre and terrifying
>>199880461eat the yolks shove the sausage into my cervix and throw the rest to the pigeons
Deepthroating a thick black coffee
>>199880461The white man is a jack of all trades
>>199880530Never sent her any nudes luckily
>>199880569Grim freak I hope you realise that you do not have a full portion of any of those vegetables on that plate
what did he mean by this
hate people. hate things. hate myself. hate the internet and i hate the world.
>labour is going to provide 60-90,000 "refugees" the right to stay Well that's one way of clearing the queue
>>199880623PROBLEM SOLVED!!!
Saw giggsy the other day
>>199880569lol is that eggcunt
>>199880641then what happend
>>199880623Could have been avoided if you had sex. Or plan i, but we don't talk about that!
>>199880569>ytpipo can't coo-
>>199880622hate the last dribble or 2 of piss that inevitably get onto the band of my pants
>>199880608always watching wazowski
>>199880622hate lunch
>>199880042engie
gwaneat it eat that
@BBCnew Kier Starmer "I love the Belgian poster on /brit/, me and my wife are big fan of a bit of glistening throbbing Timbuktu meat poles"
>>199880718kek
>>199880730Engineering what
Mousenonce looks like THAT
>>199880752
>>199880730thanks, engie!
>>199880730What the fuck is an engie? No one ever uses that word to describe a role.
>>199880763Complex systemsI only wear office cuck clothes when visiting customers on site.
feel like a heap of dying slop
>>199880806"engineer" in the british sense of the word probably - aka a technician
>>199880704Just keep shaking and squeezing your Willy like an empty tube of toothpaste for 1-2 minutes it will stop eventually
>>199880704see a doctor you could have prostate cancer
>>199880829Technicians are called technicians.
pipe engineer = plumbercable engineer = electricianheating engineer = lad who fixes your boiler
>>199880818ktimmight need to go for a cheeky beer and a suntan to perk me up
>>199880817>I only wear office cuck clothes when visiting customers on site.So you literally have no leg to stand on lmao
why don't you sharrap you old 'ore
>>199880857Only in the normiesphere.
bush
Everything would be so easier if my sister or her female friends abused me as a teen.
Threadmeister hello
>Yeah I um... engineer uh, complex systems...Not a real thing
>>199880869I don't do it daily. Next time is in September when I have to go to Germoney.
>>199880901>brazilNothing out of the ordinary
>>199880928I'm giving the minimum amount of information about what I do, if you didn't realise.
The appeal of Mao is that he was evil
*slaps thigh*Alright im offNever coming back here
>>199880853no ive taken too much alcohol over the last few days/years and have ruined my mind and body
One of the first novel experiences of 'adulthood' is realising how many teachers in retrospect were losers
>>199881059
>>199880984Yeah we get it, you're a "software engineer" for weapons systems, probably based in Berkshire or Hampshire or Wiltshire, possibly employed by Qinetiq
