pumpkin seat edition>>203976579previous
sweaty girl feet
im back
We had mice a long time ago so a handyman we knew carbon monoxide poisoned the mice hole and they died
Spinster stop bantering with Brian, you're too sweet and wholesome for him
>>203982814who?
>>203982849welcome back wizard pepe you are in good company here
step siblings are up
>>203982814Text this to your mother and then post the results
>>203982864i was told to tell you Hey youre beautiful
>>203982802This is why it's good to think these things through.I still don't see the harm in buying a smaller one
Billie Eilish is fat and disgusting
>>203982859brian is not here you are confused i'll stop witch posting as not to manifest him though
I am so f****** tired and hungry
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hOot-tQojRk
>>203982901It's ok you can post anything you want as long as we know you aren't him <3
>>203982916Kys
>>203982891You wish she was sitting on your face right now (as do I)
>>203982911go to that little chicken restaurant right there
>>203982849https://youtu.be/YVkUvmDQ3HY?si=3cy3_J5vPAVRCO4v
ONE WEEK LEFT
The flags are in the wrong order
be this level of petty anons
>>203982948This isn't real
>>203982926I'll go there tomorrow, right now I just need a couple tacos.
summing brian from ban world in satans name
>>203982923Her fat ass would crush my skull
>>203982948Man arienne Higgins is a old ass bitch to be typing like that
>>203982957ok and
>>203982967So hot
>>203982965Don't hes the lamest witch I've ever seen
>>203982965nice picture i like it a lot will be stealing
>>203982944what are you talking about you're posting on /umc/ right now
>>203982886how small are we talking?
>one life>last name is cox
>>203982984men can't be witches, they are warlocks or sorcerers or whatever only women can be witches
What do you think of this pocket monster?
>>203983019cute
>>203982993Okay, anyways, is Taco Time, adios
>>203983005I used to guy in high school named Hardy Cox
brian heins come forth from the fire and present yourself in satans name so mote it be!
>>203983045Kill yourself immediately
What do you think of this monstergirl?
watched rocky last night after you get over his autism its kinda cute and inspiring as well seperatelythe scene where they hook up is really accurate to when 2 autists get togethert. knower
>>203983030what the heck >>203983045please stop
>>203983026indeedily doodily
>>203983064wdym once you get over his autism that's the heart and soul of the movie
Never played a Bioware game.
>>203983096its a hard watch for the first bit you have to get used to the autism im sorry
>>203983092give him some cheese right now
or a blizzard game now that i think about it.
Had a tough couple of weeks. Things are looking up now though. I wonder how I'm going to fuck things up this time.
In the name of Satan and the infernal divine, 203983056 will have a bad week. So mote it be.In nomine Satanae et divinae infernalis, 203983056 malam habebunt hebdomadem. Sic fiat fiat.בשם השטן והתופת האלוהית 203983056 יעברו שבוע רע. אז תן לזה להיות.
>>203983102>>203983122certifiably y chromosome
>>203983134i have played almost every platinum game, though, and i read VNs.
>>203983005you've got it all backwards! what a blessing. i wish i could be making restaurant reservations, and when the guy asks, "and the last name?", i could shout, "cocks!"
I knew a nigga named Dollar
>>203983162ay dolla might say fuck them niggas thatcha game with
I walked by some university tonight and some girl was walking and ranting and raving about Trump and Kamala and how Trump is bad
>>203983162Well if Jews can be named Silverstein and Goldberg, I don't see why a nigga can't be named dollar
my birthday is in 2 days
me
>>203983176I want this girl to cuddle with me
>>203983176one time around the 2016 election me and my friend were walking in the mall and a guy running a stall had a 3 obama moon t shirt on and was talking about trumpm being the antichristcrazy that this insanity has been goin on for 8 years
so can we say the t or k word without being banned for politics now or what
>>203983192happy birthday anonymous is it really your birthday on halloweenie thats rad
>>203983192happy birthday
>>203983193only thing you fight is the impulse to buy baby toys for your bedroom
>>203983232its true i fought the impulse to buy a piplup squishmallow at walmart today
>>203983225thanks yeah its really on halloween though i use to hate it as a kid because i was scared of halloween>>203983231thank you
>>203983232
>>203983162
>>203983244literally me
a joke:a man accidentally misses a day of his medication, and is beginning to feel disorganized and paranoid. he realizes he needs to call his doctor, but is afraid his phone line has been cut by bad men after him. biting his lip nervously, he listens. there's no dial tone. "shit! i knew it!" he screams as he slams down the banana.
>>203983309lol
started wearing clothes that fit me
I want to date or have sex with or marry the girl at Barnes & noble. I want to have sex with her
>>203983337proud of youim still coping with 2x shirts that hang off me beacuse i hate my belly even though 1x shirts look amazing on my chest and arms
waste of time trying to summon brian so early he only comes out deep in the night when the line between the world of the living and the dead begin to blur
>>203983337i'm sure that's helping your confidence a lot
what about this one?
>>203983337The only clothes that fit me right are childrens xxl shirts
we're not going back
it's more or less over for me completely
I told my therapist about my fear of the dark. Now she charges me extra for night sessions!
>>203983361they are very coordinated
>>203983401going back where
>>203983337Baggy jeans are in thougheverbeit
I need to go back to Japan. Canada fucking sucks dicks
>>203983407thanks dad
How do I have sex? Not gay sex. No cute answers
>>203983427You miss creepshoting feet?
I think im getting a sore throat
>>203983420a fascist authoritarian hellscape
>>203983427Are you an actual nip?
>>203983464when did we live in that
>>203983448pace yourself, thrust upward, and dirty-talk how she likes. that's it.
>>203983458do you have any cough drops or lozenges
>>203983490no
>>203983458eat raw garlic
>>203983337
>>203983501drink something warm like tea and avoid carbonated stuff
ohhhh what the fuck happened to meeee
The term "hellscape" is reddit
https://www.azquotes.com/author/7425-Anthony_Jeselnik/tag/funny
wtf?
>>203983559no it isn't
i can't do it bros
>>203983600stay strong anon
>>203983600NEVER GIVE UP!
>>203983592Yes it is. So is writing in trooncase
>>203983608i look like this with the hole sweet hole sign and the diet cokes and everything
>>203983604it has nothing to do with strength. there's something i need to do and i do not have the ability to do it. that's all there is to it.
>>203983581i'm rick harrisip.
got a second monitornow i'm finally not a second class citizen
anybody knows that russian song that is a house song where a thin blond dude is dancing at the commie blocks? sounds like deep house. Brings me memories when I was with my mom
Just devoured my butternut squash noodles. I'm lazy so I just put salt and pepper on them, they were quite delicious. Truly a super food, only 200 calories in a decent sized bowl, while having tons of nutrients and being tasty and filling
>>203983692https://youtu.be/oavMtUWDBTM
>>203983675what's stopping you?
>>203983711nope
>>203983720>>203983692takis with peanut butter
https://youtu.be/2E2b_sJXutk
>>203983401Reddit>>203983464Reddit>>203983592Reddit
gonna take a giant shit and then im gonna shower
>>203983005Hey you share a name with pretty based man
watch as many movies, read as many books, and listen to as many albums as you can so you can do it again in 10 years and be like wow i remember this
got an hour before i have to sleep
>>203983730it was a house track with a russian dude dancing in front of russia's commie blocks
wanna watch rocky 2 in bed but im having fun with the new bloons card game
>>203983818>bloons card gamewuuuuuuuuh
>>203983709glad you enjoyed them! nothing wrong with a plain meal.
>>203983828https://store.steampowered.com/app/2876550/Bloons_Card_Storm/ux is a bit shit but after you finally understand whats going on i like it
The internet has fucked my life up. I’ve been looking up polar bear attacks and how to defend yourself against them. I live in the south and have never seen a polar bear and never plan on traveling anywhere close to them. I’ve had vivid dreams of being mauled by all types of wild animals that live thousand miles away from me from watching videos of them. I was supposed to go out with friends, but instead I’m doing this. Fml.
>>203983843not gonna lie as soon as i see cards i lose any interest
some posts i made to /cum/ were posted at a bar and i'd like to apologize. /cum/ has higher quality standards than what i posted
grandma got run over by a reindeer
>>203983871if it makes you feel any kind of solidarity i literally live in the south and am terrified of polar bears too, because of exactly shit like thisused to put on supposedly true horror stories to sleep to with gf and once had to fucking listen to one about some norwegian(?) college students who went on a school trip camping in the arctic and the chaperones didnt bring a rifle for them because "nah dw about it lmao" and a polar bear, being the 'im going to fuck this shit up because im bored' motherfuckers that they are just tore open tents and started crushing peoples heads/spines like water melonspolar bears are fucking giant, and heavy, and dangerous, and they dont give a FUCK because they have no predators
>>203983905it's okay anon i just got my xanax prescription back so i'll be lowering the standards some more
>>203983909at least it wasn't a dog.... is she allright?
>>203983915i forgor xanax is a prescribed drug and there isn't illegal xanax pill pressing factories making xanax for zero medical reasons
>>203983910i went to a natural history museum and they had a taxidermy of a polar bear and it was literally double my height and it's paw was bigger than my head they are really scary >>203983932i was only given a few for acute panic attacks it's not an everyday thing
genuine thoughts on anime bitches?
>>203983969they're a little noisy.
it's time to poop
https://youtu.be/uLcDXja0qbw?si=8u5P7R72EGIkrN11
>>203983999tell me when you are done
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2011_Svalbard_polar_bear_attacksorry, they did have a gun
>>203983910>>203983939I think they may be my biggest fear. I hate sleeping now because every time I have dreams of scary looking animals charging after me and eventually eating me alive. I can literally feel the excruciating pain in my dream. I wake up screaming, but I can’t tell anyone about my dreams because they’ll find it ridiculous, which it is. I seriously hope I don’t meet one in my dreams tonight. I’ll wake up crying again. I don’t know why I keep looking up “wild animal attacks scary” on YouTube.
Okay, I feel better now
just getting wasted, like a real manhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pWwuAU8CtCw
eating red baron pizza
>>203984046>Police later disclosed that the organisers of the expedition had not assigned a night watchman, because of dense fog on the night of the incident, and that during the emergency their gun failed to fire four times because its safety catch was engaged.[7] Leaders of such expeditions are advised that camps should be protected by trip wires that detonate deterrent explosives, lookouts through the night, or guard dogs. Of those options, the camp used trip wires, but they failed to triggerKek they are like actual monsters
>>203984046>and that during the emergency their gun failed to fire four times because its safety catch was engaged.oh, man...
>>203984097I hate double tortillas, why do they do that?
>>203984120OOOOOO YOU CAN DANCEYOU CAN JIVEHAVING THE TIME OF YOUR LIFE
>>203984112its sloppy and packed so some of it falls onto the next one, you only pick up 1 tortilla at a timeidk that show i do it as a gringo
>>203984097and the cilantro, onions and pineapple are badly chopped. I hope they didn't cost more than $7 pesos
>>203984112Because they break
>>203984024the deed is done
>>203984149nice altar, I hate double tortillas
>>203984137>its sloppy and packed so some of it falls onto the next one, you only pick up 1 tortilla at a timeI dislike this food design
holloween and day of the dead tracks go herehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e2c8NkNY41U
Life is moving so fast. I think God may be forcing me to make it and stop being a loser
>southerners afraid of fucking ice bearsYou guys are such faggots
>>203984149I hope you get cholera
>>203983969positive>>203984099i always buy red baron. i don't have a good reason why
>>20398414010 pesos each , or dollar for both
>>203983939>i went to a natural history museum and they had a taxidermy of a polar bear and it was literally double my height and it's paw was bigger than my head they are really scarythis kinda shit is horrifying, it instills a sense of fear in a lot of animals when you do this with, or trying to imagine ancient animalsthose tiny denisovan humans who lived on an island with giant storms that probably ate them fucks me up bad, i fucking hate birds
>dont use shitty tortillas or over stuff them>they don't breakwow
i have a good feeling about next week (tuesday specifically)
>>203984251Let's not talk about it
>>203984257this
>>203984229who are you quoting?
>be me>make greentext>newfags can't comprehend thiswow
gonna watch 12 angry men
>>203984294It's October 29th and you will watch a horror movie instead
>>203984302nope.
>>203984311Fuck off
If the average height in japan is only 2 inches below ours, there's no way they're all short af
Feel like I have to vom again
I just want Andres Manuel to imitate Johnny Cash once again
NYC just got nuked.
>>203984311my man, all-ballz-walz
>only way to find a gf is through online dating>I never get matches in online dating So should I just kill myself?
I've been trying to write a joke for hours now but I cannot fucking do it. I am the least funny person on the entire planet.
>>203984348I wish
>>203984361hey that's pretty funny
>>203984327sick or drunk?
Wish japan didn't exist, the internet would be a much better place. Imagine if gay retards were obsessed with a different country
>>203984302It's October 29 and im watching star trek
>>203984356get really good at selling yourself in an online setting, i guess. look good, set up shots, edit them, say the right things, etc. it's a skill, it can be trained, just like the skill for going through a date correctly, and so on. persistence
>>203984311Isnt john mccain dead i dont get it
Is someone getting angry over politics?!
>>203984356I always get a bunch of matches and messages when I first install it then it dies down after a few days which makes me think it's all just a ploy to pique your interest and then suck you in
>>203984390>persistence I've been on dating apps for 6 years. I have tried numerous different approaches. Nothing works. I'm ugly, which in this society means that I deserve to be lonely and unwanted.
Slaking my thirst with a beautiful glass of gingered ale
fancy a shag?
>online dating
>>203984401Yes thats literally what it isIts algorithmic to boist new accounts then bury you to buy premium
>>203984408>Slaking
>>203984414Online dating is only for 10/10 chads. Everyone else is going to fail.
>>203984408Your thirst is a truant?>>203984414Hes ugly and his bio is shitAlso other anon needs to realize dating apps are for hookups not finding a wife
>>203984414online dating isn't a meme. if you get 719 matches and 1 date, the problem is you
>>203984416It's extremely evil to exploit people's loneliness like this
>mouthbreather politics hoursimma go on the tablet and watch that flick. laters
>>203984432Then where do I find a wife? It's frowned upon to approach women outside of bars.I fucking hate being alive
>>203984447Boohoo bitch nigga
tfw cant sleep
who won? Chadmala or Chumpd?
>>203984437Yes, it isThr entire world is run like thisEverything is about maximizing engagement with thing so you'll hopefully spend money, and they are literally handcrafted and designed to psychologically prey on you
>>203983092its BEGGING for dick!
>>203984475>Jew president You don't get to decide who's Chad
Let me out of this Mexican invested desert hellhole ffs why me
>>203984475they both asked what the point of winning was if winning means someone loses and decided to join together so that America could win :) and then a new two party state formed with the democrats and republicans as one
>>203984454>Then where do I find a wife?Wherever you would find a woman, especially the kind you want. Book stores, local events, through friends or work>It's frowned upon to approach women outside of bars.It's really not that big a deal unless youre being a freak about it
So no steam sale this year? All I see is some 3d gimmick shit
>>203984454i was getting eyefucked by a girl on the walk home today. you'll know when to say something, if they like how you look you'll get stares and signs. you don't have to believe me to believe that your hair can look better, you can make a coordinated outfit that looks good, etc. you can talk to girls by doing nothing other than walking outside>>203984510is there anything to buy? i already got the factorio DLC
>>203984510what were you hoping would be on sale?
ive never seen a carpool lane
interior crocodile alligator
>>203984560Drive into a big city on the integers interstate
>>203984414>719 matches>1 (ONE) dateThis is a severe rizz issue, not even his dogshit profile
peanut butter tasted better when it was at the end of the jar and had all solidified
apparently some people are so stressed out about the election that they feel ill
>>203984573ive crack asthma i sell a 5 pack of inhalers
>>203984593GrimFeel genuinely sad for these people
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JGSFAdKZ7zU
>>203984593i cant even imagine itfeel like i live in a different world from these people
>>203984593I am one of them.I'm legitimately afraid of democracy being destroyed
HELLO, human. your DATING PROFILE is: MALE, AGE 24 on TINDER for: 3 YEARS. here are your DATING INSIGHTS
>>203984637Democracy is stronger now more than everCovid regulations basically overturned 2020's election
Watch gorilla fights
>>203984637Calm down little chuddyAlways remember nothing ever happens
>>203984654>Democracy is stronger now more than everIn case anyone's wondering, this is verifiably false.
me in Minnesota book store: oop you dont mind if i scoot in here witcha now do ya no
>>203984637what did democracy ever do for you
Does the nanny not know what NSFW is or something? I've seen a lot of lude posts getting deleted
>>203984680Democracy fucking sucks its either mob rule or a farce fir oligarchy
fucking killed myself with the plasma lazer
I wish I was a monkey or some wild animal and could engage in small to large scale wars on other animals.
>>203984715well which is it? plasma or laser?
Trying to install Windows 7 on a VM for the first time. Torrented the ISO, but now I need a product key, how do I get this?? Don't see a keygen anywhere on public trackers.Also, why do I fucking have to wait like 4 minutes to post on 4chan now? I rarely post here anymore after they added timers, but this is fucking ridiculous.
>>203984744were you the person shitting?
>>203984706Nsfw doesnt just mean nude or goreLots of things are not suitable for workMarnie in a micro bikini isnt sfw just because no nipples
>>203984764no
>>203984435no, it's online dating. i have never hooked up through apps, but i have fucked multiple neighbors
>>203984637same, i got prescribed atavan to help with my panic attacks. at least we care about the future of the world unlike these facetious jaded idiots.
>>203984743This but unironically Spread joy and love and kindness
>>203984762why are you installing windows 7 thoughbut anyways you can spoof a product key, you'll find out how with a google search
>>203984752plasma cutter
would you wear sneakers with a suit
>>203984796never
>>203984762Zoomers dont know about windows u toolkit
>>203984792oh noita. never played it, but it looks fun. better luck on your next run!
>>203984796i've never worn a suit in my life. i went to a wedding once but i just wore basketball shorts
throat is getting worse and my head is starting to hurt
>>203984796Im not david tennant i cant pull that off
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hx2T0VBh8Qc
>>203984796out in public? never. only when i sleep.
>>203984823stay hydrated and maybe check your temperature to see if you have a fevertake some tylenol too but take your temperature before you take the tylenol
business idea: free creampies
>>203984812i was hoping to unlock some achievements this run probably wont get a wand this good for the next 10 tries
>>203984821
>>203984853Gonna drink some mango juice and take Tylenol or maybe Nyquil if i want a comfy nightmare
>>203984680Ok but I'm talking about American democracy, which is in the style of representative Republic, which is a type of democracy
>>203984875but the us isn't a democracy by any stretch
>>203984887I just told you a representative Republic is a type of democracy How is it not?
>>203984872that works, get well soon anon if you've got work or school tomorrow, go ahead and call out
Advertisements?
>>203984680>mapLOL
>>203984891shes so pretty
>>203984875https://www.brookings.edu/articles/understanding-democratic-decline-in-the-united-states/
>>203984762maybe you could use your current product key?
>>203984890>Giving him permissionYou really are /cum/ mommy
>>203984890thanks i hope ill be fine in the morning
>>203984897Demonstrate that you understand the issue by putting it into your own big boy words Do you think I'm going to have discourse with a 20000 word article?
>>203984891what time do you have your alarm set to
>>203984889because the people elect representatives to write laws and allocate government funding, but the agencies that enforce the laws behave in arbitrary and capricious ways, nto according to the will of the representative or the electorate. not only do they ignore the laws as written, they also ignore funding appropriations. the us is a police state. laws are defacto written by the police and enforced at their discretion and convenience.
The united states is an oligarchy larping as a democracy
>>203984765Where do you work? We've got micro bikini calenders all over the place at mine. And it's pretty arbitrary considering that's more or less the definition they've been using since... ever
>>203984926What's 7th grade like?
>>203984897>written by a woman>first words are "experts agree">doesn't cite or quote a single of these experts immediatelydropped. women should not have influence or power in society
>>203984925>because the people elect representatives to write laws and allocate government fundingThis makes it a democracy >but the agencies that enforce the laws behave in arbitrary and capricious ways, nto according to the will of the representative or the electorate. not only do they ignore the laws as written, they also ignore funding appropriations. This means people are stupid and voting poorly. It does not mean the USA is not a democracy
shes so pretty
>>203984924I have one for 13:30 tmrw to remind me of my chiropractor appointment
>>203984856just throw youself at it. all the cool stuff i've ever done in a video game was just trying whatever hard thing over and over. i don't even advise focus. just keep at it until it breaks.
>>203984946what a cop out
>>203984933ask your girlfriend
pineapple slices for the peanut butter after c:
>>203984948law enforcement agencies are not voted into power. changing legislature won't affect this since their power over the executive branch is by control of the funding, but the executive branch goes around the legislature to secure funding on its own. you didn't engage with anything i said
>>203984930Obviously the term and its rules are ablut white collar office workTheres a whole different culture if you work in a garrage
In the thread straight up jorkin it, and by it i mean, well, lets just say, my peanits
mordecai is so sexy
>>203984926how about a kakistocracy LARPing as a gerontocracy
>>203984925Have you gone outside at all in your adult life?
>>203984948It means the system doesnt work
>>203985008>>203985008>>203985008
>>203984967
>>203984963Why is it when your group decides an article isnt a good enough source ots the dumb chuds fault for falling for propaganda, but when the chud says it hes just copping out?
>>203984979Blue board f-word. Enjoy your ban. Take it away, janny
>>203984978What has been enforced isn't, though. It's just the last like, day that one of the jannies has taken a puritanical stance on it. Exposed elbow? Gotta go!
Good evening