The original incel flat edition
>>204540029how is that "bizarre" you shitstain, i was just adding to what i said
>wfhtoil on a fridaywho could have possibly predicted that I would once again get almost nothing done?
>>204540068i'm only gonna ask you oncedelete this post
Got a cracker of a post ready and waiting for the new
GDP per capita in the UK is lower now than it was almost 20 years ago and that's not even adjusted for inflationThis country was genuinely one of the wealthiest and most prosperous major societies in the mid 2000s and now it is just an economic also ranThe quality of life has declined massively, our real terms salaries are completely stagnant, taxes are higher, competitiveness reduced, we are hamstrung by regulation, endless wasteful spending, and our economy is full of leeches both foreign and domesticThe UK is a carcass and the feast is only just beginning, soon there will only be bones left
>>204540078what are you doing instead
What's with these diagnosed autists making it their cornerstone of their lives? Every now and then there's an article about this on the BBC about how life changing it was for a doctor to tell "yeah, you're an autistic fuck innit"If a doctor told me I had ADHD or whatever nothing would change and I certainly wouldn't go around telling everyone
got a cracker of a poo ready and waiting for my bumhole
>>204540078kitmI was in all week and got a fuckload done tbftoday is a proper doss though, been out for a coffee and a run and done literally fuck all but emails
>>204540086i'm only gonna ask you oncewill you be my valentine?
Think I've seen too much porn because I am bored of it now. What do you recommend? How do I scratch the itch?
>>204540105they're boring pieces of soulless shit who need imaginary illnesses to feel special
>>204540078We have to log our time at toil and I've got fuck all to do, not sure how much I can fake today working from home
>>204540101don't ask me questions
Fuckin... so I’m sitting there, right? Not doing much, just staring at the telly, not watching it. Then I hear a slap. I look over at the fish tank. I’d forgotten I even had one. There’s a fish, this daft-looking thing, just flapping about. It does this weird leap. Doesn’t look like it’s trying to escape or anything, just showing off, like.I think, "Alright, pal. What's all this about?" But it keeps jumping. Again and again. Like it’s trying to impress me.So I get up. “What’s goin’ on here?” I walk over, and the fish looks right at me, like it’s staring into my soul. Then it flops back into the water all dramatic. I’m standing there thinking, "What was that, mate? You tryin’ to tell me somethin’?"It’s just the fish and me now. Silence. And then, out of nowhere, the light goes out. Not a power cut, just like the fish switched it off. Dead spooky.Then I hear it, this voice. Right in my head. "Get a life, Anon," it says. I’m like, “What?” The fish jumps again, the lights flicker back on, and I just sit back down, staring at the screen. That’s it. Nothing more.And I’m left wondering: was it the fish? Or was it me? One of those moments, you know?
>>204540129Time to step up to more depraved offerings, or stopping porn altogether for a month or so until normal porn becomes good again
>>204540129watch videos of fatal car crashes
>>204540129go younger
>>204540105>What's with these diagnosed autists making it their cornerstone of their lives?Like how frogposters do? It's no different, seethe on all you want.
>>204540105Everyone has to have their own little badge so they can proudly display it.
>>204540105love of time travel fictionDoctor Who series 2-4 only watcher. Can tell a mile off
>>204540159live right nowhttps://www.twitch.tv/limmy
hope ali wins
life has not gone well for me. having thoughts of ending it all.
hope ai wins
Life is going well for me. Having thoughts of living forever.
>>204540200isn't there any other way?
>>204540200hit the gym
>>204540228the way of suffering.
>>204540105ive got autism thats why i pos here
hope limmy wins
>>204540200find an asmr gf and have a nice little wank, you'll feel better
posted diego unmasked in the old :facepalm:
>>204540174excuse me
It was on the dock that I received quite a shock as I gazed upon the cock of ole Doc Ock. It was two foot long and hard as a rock as it pointed up from under a frock.
>>204540252ok
asmr small penis humiliation mukbang
i will live forever
>>204540243you don't suffer
>>204540267doubtful. wanking makes me even more miserable and suicidal. i dont know what an asmr gf is but if its anything to do with actual women they dont want anything to do with me.
Never get these runts going oh bloo bloo I have nothing aaaaaaaaThat's great, having nothing and no one expecting anything from you is total freedom, you can be a complete dole scrounger just enjoying your days down spoons smoking rollies and supping stellas and enjoying the curry club Being born into tarqdome comes with serious expectations and responsibility, it is a heavy burden around the neck
>>204540314yeah you're right, sounds like you should kill yourself
you should, like, maximize your suffering
>>204540299i only suffer>>204540328yes
Sir Dole Scrounger
Going to start buying things from companies with a royal warrantI WILL buy BritishI WILL pay extra for the privilegeand I WILL be happy
>>204540326blog on you boring bastard
somali women look like THAT?
>>204540091The line...went down?
Imaginal DIsk. Nice album
relying on the gov for money is losingrelying on a job for money is losing
>>204540359We must not have been importing enough 'grants
>>204540357love are maya. magnificent specimen of a woman
This Bluesky thing sounds gayer than Eurovision
this is bob marley's father
>>204540091why did all that happen
>>204540129have you tried JAV? That's like a doorway to an entire new magical realm of depravity
>>204540340Alri Buddha
>>204540357member when she was a literal who and appeared on big fat quiz and everyone went cor who's that and suddenly she's on TV constantly
>>204540428i don't think he ever said that
>>204540357literally who
hahahaha just thought of a really funny joke
Elon Musk is a janny
>>204540493blog on, please
>>204540493lmao
>>204540438for me it was that peter crouch lockdown thing where she had a tight dress on which showed off her sumptuous arse. i distinctly remember having a wank after seeing that
>>204540503I will not have a yank tell me what to do in my people's thread. /brit/ for the British (and Aussies)>>204540512good one innit lad haha. Love are American brothers me
Listening to music, I am.
gimmicks per capita in /brit/ is lower now than it was almost 10 years ago and that's not even adjusted for inflationThis thread was genuinely one of the prosperous and most influential major generals in the mid 2010s and now it is just a shithole also ranThe quality of posting has declined massively, our real terms gimmicks are completely stagnant, schizos are higher, shitposting reduced, we are hamstrung by jannies, endless wasteful posts, and our threads are full of leeches both foreign and domestic/brit/ is a carcass and the feast is only just beginning, soon there will only be bones left
alri lads, diarrhoealad here, just done diarrhoea #16 I think but losing track now. just been to the tescos to buy immodiums and electrolyte tablets. hoping that sorts me out as I feel rotten so I do.
Image board, lads
>>204540516/brit/ is your life
>>204540410Don't like itSaw some of it on efukt onceWoman having all these little fish inserted into her anus and then they put a camera in there and placed the live feed right in her face and she was in floods of tears looking at this weird close up of the inside of her rectum with all these little fish packed in thereDidn't find that very wankable
>>204540554
>>204540553Yeah you're probably dehydrated lad, drink up and have a load of salt
Been charging my electric car at work for over a year now, toilberg still hasn’t found out about it. I park right at the back of the office and there’s an outdoor three pin plug that never gets used that is quite well hidden by a small wall. It only recharges the battery by like 20% at best over an 8 hour day but I have a short commute that only uses a few percent there and back depending on the weather so over a whole week I end up with pretty much a full charge, only have to top it up at home if I’m planning a big trip at the weekend
>>204540549Um diarrhealad is right here>>204540553
>>204540541i said please...
>>204538305
>>204540516>WE WUZ KANGZ N SHIET
>don't get british cultural references>nobody responds to themwhy don't yanks fuck off
Need a FUCKING HOBBYANY FUCKING SUGGESTIONS, LADS?
>>204540634learn albanian
>>204540634bouldering
>>204540634try to eat animals who are alive
>>204540634archery
>>204540583aye lad I'm getting on it, got these fizzy red tablets that you drop in a glass of water. doesn't look too appealing I'll be honest but if it helps get me pooing solid poos and feeling normal again then I'm game x
>>204540587What car do you have?
>>204538883Phwoar, gworn lad. I hit 150kg for reps yesterday and felt strong
how come tiger woods is one of those niggas who looks Chinese
>>204539353Genuinely in tears at this post, can't believe it went unnoticed
>>204540580it's not all weird fetish stuff lad, you've only seen the memes
>>204540677Full name is Crouching Tiger Woods
>>204540677https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tiger_Woods#Background_and_family> In 2002, ESPN claimed: "For the record, he is one-quarter Thai, one-quarter Chinese, one-quarter Caucasian, one-eighth African American and one-eighth Native American."
corring and phwoarring
>>204539445Love seeing these mongos get absolutely shat on
get your t levels checked if you can't wank it to a crying woman quite frankly
>>204540723crikey
Been shagging my electric car at work for over a year now, toilberg still hasn’t found out about it. I park right at the back of the office and there’s an electric car shagging spot that is quite well hidden by a small wall.
>>204540752woke nonsense
Defund the RNLI
>>204540672Its a Model 3 lad
>>204540779>>204540766
reckon i should be king
You ever feel like your head's stuck in a tire?
>>204540723love how even the historically formal and conservative BBC has to allow its presenters to dress like this now because they're terrified of being criticised for "censoring female empowerment" or some bollocks
i have an insatiable hunger for water
I like the idea of riding a motorcycle. How dangeous are they, really?
>>204540815strange thing to love
>>204540779It's objectively one of the best electric cars and one of the most important cars ever made but the Model 3 is also such an NPCmobile I can't tell you
You wanna know what I love?
BBC has never been conservative, it shags all races and creeds
>>204540834Motorcycles aren't dangerous, crashing them is
>>204540776good post
Why is London Disappearing?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPJti1ASGcc
>>204540834Death traps mate don't bother
have such a vivid memory of the first time i heard gangnam style (someone played it over their mic while i was playing dayz)don't know why brainbaum decided that would be a core memory but i can barely remember what i had for dinner a couple days ago
>>204540834imagine it'd be pretty cold
>>204540834on today's roads? extremely
sucking a peach iced tea
*weaves in between your posts with an L plate and a just eat box*
Mad how girls can wear yoga pants anywhere now, there was a lass working at Tescohen yesterday with her big fat arse on display. Modernity isn't all bad.
>>204540878This. Roads are full of absolute mongs these days who have no fucking idea how to drive safely.
anti spam measures working well I see >>204535853
camel toenail
sucking an electrolyte drink to make up for fluid loss as a result of my horrific 'rrhoea attacks over the last couple of days it's red, slightly fizzy and grim. shan't be continuing with these once I'm better that much is certain.
got some soup which i might have for me lunch with a nice bit of bread and salted butter
>>204540850Don’t really care if some incel on 4chan thinks I’m an “NPC” tbqh lol
>>204540908kek, don't forget the handlebar mittens lad
>>204540834veryonly takes one mong not really paying attention to pull out in front of you and it's a coin-toss between instant death or quadraspazzed on a lifeglugmy dad's an ex biker and he's got a whole list of mates who've died in crashes
>>204540945and the brown skin
>>204540925*spits in it*
Anyone up for a classic /brit/ vax debate?Diego mate you in, know you're always down for it.
>>204540978Good morning 190
ive got a passing complexion
the ocean is too deep
Caprinos is just franchised kizza isnt it
Just seen some mongo charging his model 3 at work and laughing manically
>>204540989Hey dtfic
eating a black person's faeces
>>204541035Alright
An error has occured in one of your routes.Detail: redis.nim(122) raiseReplyErrorasyncfutures.nim(385) readasyncfutures.nim(385) readasyncfutures.nim(385) readasyncfutures.nim(385) readExpected "OK" got "PIPELINED"
some spasticsa round when it comes to investing>just make a 2% gain daily for 2 years bro. you'll be a multi millionaireok tell me where the 2% daily gains are without losing your money once in 2 years
Nothing is happening. All happenings have been cancelled forever.
>>204541024Basically yeah. It’s really nice kizza as well
jewnited states
this is my world today
expecting to hear my gran has died any momentsurprisingly unaffected by it tbqh
>>204541140/brit/ is your life every day
>>204540962corr do me mouth next
>>204541140Get it tarmac'd
>>204540008What jobs do nonces do when they get out of prison? Genuinely do they get work or what it’s fascinating to me how anyone could employ
YORKSHIREYORKSHIREYORKSHIRE
>>204541062>he missed out on cryptongmi
>>204541165doing a bit of research for when you're released is it?
>>204541153all of my grandparents died when i was younggot no mates either meDAVINA BRAIN OP
sticking my finger up my jacksie
>>204541176no i didn't
>>204541181Done him
>>204541165cook, barkeep, actor, etc
>>204541165There's always work at the BBC
>>204541185Looking forward to seeing her best bits
fun fact : it's hard to diagnose breast cancer of women with darker skinned breasts
>>204541165they usually end up unemployable dossers until the reoffend and end up back in prison and the cycle repeats ad nauseam
need a mini soda gf
GET THE NONCES OUT OF PRISONGET THEM FAKE DBS CLEARANCEGET THEM EMPLOYED IN PRIMARY SCHOOLS
>>204541242How so?
fun fact : nonces are called rock-spiders in australian prison slang as they like to get into little cracks
>>204541165probably move to a different part of the country, live on bennies because they're unemployable and live in fear of the day the local rorkes on the council estate come round with their spraycans to daub 'nonce' on their doors and windows
Is /brit/ dying
>>204541278
>>204541375Yep, thankfully. Been a noticeable decline recently.
had two immodiums and within thirty minutes ejected another pint of searing hot diarrhoea bringing us up to 17 poos
So why even let them out in the first place? Nonces surely have their entire life ruined after conviction, why not just kill themselves?
>>204541282because people use near infrared light in photoacoustic imaging of cancer tissuesbut the loss of near infrared light is higher with darker skin because the light is absorbed by melanins
>>204541266she looks like she enthusiastically makes herself sexually available to men of subsaharan african descent
getting to level 55 then quitting the new CoD. Too tryhard
So... how's life? What you been up to?
>>204540129To having porn and stop masturbating, not for any moral reasons. If you come off a masturbation and porn addiction cold turkey, your mind will subconsciously crave and expect sex as part of its daily life, thus you can more easily manifest a gf or sex or something but you’ll have to be painting and wait because it takes a while for your lazy mind to take to such lengths because it’s desperate. Like I mean a month or two months minimum.
got my willy in a vagina
Just reached PRESTIGE 10 lads.
>>204541493I've been blogging on /brit/ about my acute diarrhoea for the past couple of days now, engagement metrics are looking good x
>>204541418have you got food poisoning? 17 shits is horrific. your arse must be bleeding and your tummy must be sore. should have had codeine like i told you.
If I don't have a wank I don't watch porn, and if I don't watch porn I don't see any fit birds, so I basically become asexual between wanks. Not ideal I reckon.
>>204541418love a nice squirty shit
>>204541532fortunately I'm not suffering too badly, it's just annoying really as I feel poorly and can't do anything except sit in bed. I did think about your codeine thing and funnily enough I have a packet of actual codeine tablets from when I broke my leg but they didn't do anything to bung me up when I was taking them full time so decided against it, hoping the immodiums start working soon.
>>204541418at what point do you just put on a nappy?
>>204541536Who elected you judge and jury in the body of a beautiful girl?
>>204541468don't think so tbqh
so grim in town
i just can't take people seriously who wear "smart watches"
>>204541580I've shit the bed twice in two days so I was pondering some sort of pseudonappy made of a bin bag and tape in case it happened again since I'm running out of clean bed sheets, in the end I've just decided to stop sleeping in the nip as I usually do and double bag it with pants and pyjama bottoms as an emergency layer
>>204541620didnt your country invent the smart watch
The lunch kizza My day off after all
>>204541634If this is real then you should go to A&E
>>204541536I occasionally pass a truly fit bird in the wild, like once a month or so, and I get all hot and bothered and keep staring at them
>>204541536i have to watch straight porn once a fortnight because im afraid of turning into a complete sissy
>>204541658Peng
>>204541493loads of stuff. dont want to upset all the misanthropic incels here though
>>204541658the runtius maximus, the king of slop
>>204541680I'm not going to hospital to tell the doctor I've got the squits m8
>>204541620same. its npc behaviour. i also cant take anyone wearing a gaudy watch seriously. 95% oof watch wearers are wankers.
>>204541658absolutely grim
>>204541658Grim
>>204541703Gwan lad, might do them good to see that doing stuff is indeed possible
>>204541774>>204541620how about exercise trackers, are they okay
>>204541700>>204541721>>204541776>>204541789imbeciles
>>204541828Your point?
have you looked at the weather next week? the temperate is plummeting. think ill go out this weekend then as i dont really want to be walking around in 5c weather.
>>204541828
>>204541828>Donna PizzaI think I went to school with her
Got a competition this weekend, bit nervous
>>204541828still grim thougheverbeit
>>204541865Just wear a coat you mong
>>204541865just means my incelwalks will be quicker
>>204541875relax lad, just remember to use plenty of lube
Wonder what he meant by that "joke"
I reckon I could pull Sydney Sweeny if we met irl
>>204541915dont have a proper coat.
>>204541956Isn't she irish diaspora? You'd better be brown
on the ol' 'roin
>>204541978pop down the charity shops, should be something warm enough
god i really need to live somewhere where it's sunny all the time. i look awful and ghostly without a tan.
Learn to build cabins in the snow
imagine a japanese person trying to pronounce "honorary aryan"
>>204542048Just do a winter holiday lad
>>204542048fuck off we're full
>>204540129I exclusively masturbate via facetiming women I met online (usually Tinder) and wanking off together.
>>204542055they have a problem with l's not r's
>>204542093Well you don't, so
Oh my days
Ho your nights
>>204542048this explains my cuteness
>>204542120what's the matter, Cregg?
what abhuge waste fof t8m life is
>>204542100It will never cease to amaze me how the most mundane shite will be declared a myth and an impossibility by lads on /brit/. It's so fucking weird lol
rey rave roblem rith rels not rars
erryting gwan be alree
katy is excited for the weekend
>>204542055there are no japanese people
>>204542145ok pal
>>204542151alri scoob
>>204542143Nothing, I just wanted to post that to see what it feels like
>>204542055アナラリーアリアン
>>204540129time to graduate to real degenerate shit like piss and fisting
>>204542145Ah yes, the most everyday mundane shite like wanking on facetime to women in your area
oh piss off you fat wanker
>>204542209apologise for darwin bombings
>>204542209and a ching chong nip nong to you tpo mate
>>204542205how was it?
going to become self employed
Drinking coffee from my $100000000000000 mug
love love LOVE "Ah yes" posting
>>204542216wanking over cam with strangers online is absolutely mundane. you've heard of omegle, surely?
first brew of the day and it lush
Mental how you could go to the docs in the early 21st century and he would recommend taking up smoking and prescribe you cocaine
the cronem getting shape-ups
quite enjoying the new cod
>wanking over cam with strangers online is absolutely mundane.
>short eastern european girl at always goes on break with the tall dude old enough to be her dad you just know...
first poo of the day and it lush
aig
cronem gettin his shape-up
>>204542288Hey mate got plans tonight?
>>204542222you mean apologise for making this kind of propaganda
staying off the vapes for a bit me coughing lungs up
>>204542235I felt like Danny from Rate My Takeaway.
cronem got the fresh waves
Kizza is a great gimmick to be honest
>>204542330CORR
>>204542359Shut the fuck up Spainigger lmfao
>>204542330screaming
moving in with my gf to our new home :)life is good haha
fucking motherfucking cockersucker aaaaAAAAA
waves looking brazybeard game silly
>>204542400hope this post really hurts the incel freaks
i might start doing correct grammar and punctuation
>>204542400>moving in with my gfthis doesn't happen. stop lying on /brit/
>>204542330Is the bottom pic showing an aussie deserting so he can stalk the outback to rape boongs??
mmhmm get yo locks done yung nyukka
>>204542209ありがとう desu
>>204542438no
>>204542400ktim about a month and a half ago looking forward to the future with the gf now im alone with no gf no mates or prospects
right this poo was a non-starter, think I'm going to give in for nowconstipationberg got me on the ropes
>>204542469Well you didn't, so
>>204542457you are mentally disabled
>>204542330This was Japanese propaganda
Spainfreak, Heathermong and the Belgian all trapped in an old Mondeo that's about to be put through a car crusherAh, yes, lovely
>>204542418>using blood and crip slang interchangeably you're so white it hurts
diego come home
>>204542513>Spainfreak, Heathermong and the BelgianThe cronem
Yeah 190 get your Diego LARP fired up It is Friday after all
>>204542469used to sympathise with you but you've been such an annoying prick with the non-stop blogging despite every cunt here telling you to fuck off, im glad its happened to you and im glad you're hurting. fuck you.im imagine you being an obnoxious and obstinate prick is what got your arse dumped in the first place. and you've learnt nothing. pathetic
>>204542514cronem is not crip slang silly man
>someone mentions something even tangentially related to being sexual or romantic with women>a half dozen posts come flooding in saying that never happeneddo these people not know that /brit/ is a normie general?
>>204542438Think it's showing aussies in Papau New GuinneaBut it looks like he's having as much fun with the natives as the yank so not sure how this is supposed to convince him not to go
>>204542547okay incel
>>204542567Ah yes wanking to strangers on facetime, very much "normie" behaviour
>and I see here you've been unemployed for a few years, may I ask what you were doing during that time?>Uhh yeah, see me and da cronem...
MIGHT have to move back in with mumberg again lads
Would love to go for a pint with spaino
one lads got the shits and another lads got constipationthe duality of man
>>204542594enjoy your shitty christmas ALONE loool
>>204542558Yes it is you fucking idiot You're cringe as fuck for LARPing as a gangbanger but you're also retarded
>>204542547incel meltie
>>204542507true, i meant he should demand apology for that instead of some irrelevant city bombing
cronem thinking about dem backshots he boutta give
>>204542606what are you on about
>>204542633you have such a sad life man
>>204542631wankin to this
what we saying lads? Is it a fish day or a shit day for are Mark?
>>204542681>>204542681>>204542681
is /brit/ wheelchair accessible?
>>204542691no i threw the ramp in the river
The last /brit/ :skull: