>>204540029
how is that "bizarre" you shitstain, i was just adding to what i said

>wfhtoil on a friday
who could have possibly predicted that I would once again get almost nothing done?

>>204540068
i'm only gonna ask you once
delete this post

Got a cracker of a post ready and waiting for the new

GDP per capita in the UK is lower now than it was almost 20 years ago and that's not even adjusted for inflation
This country was genuinely one of the wealthiest and most prosperous major societies in the mid 2000s and now it is just an economic also ran
The quality of life has declined massively, our real terms salaries are completely stagnant, taxes are higher, competitiveness reduced, we are hamstrung by regulation, endless wasteful spending, and our economy is full of leeches both foreign and domestic
The UK is a carcass and the feast is only just beginning, soon there will only be bones left

>>204540078
what are you doing instead

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What's with these diagnosed autists making it their cornerstone of their lives? Every now and then there's an article about this on the BBC about how life changing it was for a doctor to tell "yeah, you're an autistic fuck innit"
If a doctor told me I had ADHD or whatever nothing would change and I certainly wouldn't go around telling everyone

got a cracker of a poo ready and waiting for my bumhole

>>204540078
kitm
I was in all week and got a fuckload done tbf
today is a proper doss though, been out for a coffee and a run and done literally fuck all but emails

>>204540086
i'm only gonna ask you once

will you be my valentine?

Think I've seen too much porn because I am bored of it now. What do you recommend? How do I scratch the itch?

>>204540105
they're boring pieces of soulless shit who need imaginary illnesses to feel special

>>204540078
We have to log our time at toil and I've got fuck all to do, not sure how much I can fake today working from home

>>204540101
don't ask me questions

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Fuckin... so I’m sitting there, right? Not doing much, just staring at the telly, not watching it. Then I hear a slap. I look over at the fish tank. I’d forgotten I even had one. There’s a fish, this daft-looking thing, just flapping about. It does this weird leap. Doesn’t look like it’s trying to escape or anything, just showing off, like.

I think, "Alright, pal. What's all this about?" But it keeps jumping. Again and again. Like it’s trying to impress me.

So I get up. “What’s goin’ on here?” I walk over, and the fish looks right at me, like it’s staring into my soul. Then it flops back into the water all dramatic. I’m standing there thinking, "What was that, mate? You tryin’ to tell me somethin’?"

It’s just the fish and me now. Silence. And then, out of nowhere, the light goes out. Not a power cut, just like the fish switched it off. Dead spooky.

Then I hear it, this voice. Right in my head. "Get a life, Anon," it says. I’m like, “What?” The fish jumps again, the lights flicker back on, and I just sit back down, staring at the screen. That’s it. Nothing more.

And I’m left wondering: was it the fish? Or was it me? One of those moments, you know?

>>204540129
Time to step up to more depraved offerings, or stopping porn altogether for a month or so until normal porn becomes good again

>>204540129
watch videos of fatal car crashes

>>204540129
go younger

>>204540105
>What's with these diagnosed autists making it their cornerstone of their lives?
Like how frogposters do? It's no different, seethe on all you want.

>>204540105
Everyone has to have their own little badge so they can proudly display it.

>>204540105
love of time travel fiction
Doctor Who series 2-4 only watcher. Can tell a mile off

>>204540159
live right now
https://www.twitch.tv/limmy

hope ali wins

life has not gone well for me. having thoughts of ending it all.

hope ai wins

Life is going well for me. Having thoughts of living forever.

>>204540200
isn't there any other way?

>>204540200
hit the gym

>>204540228
the way of suffering.

>>204540105
ive got autism thats why i pos here

hope limmy wins

>>204540200
find an asmr gf and have a nice little wank, you'll feel better

posted diego unmasked in the old :facepalm:

>>204540174
excuse me

It was on the dock that I received quite a shock as I gazed upon the cock of ole Doc Ock. It was two foot long and hard as a rock as it pointed up from under a frock.

>>204540252
ok

asmr small penis humiliation mukbang

i will live forever

>>204540243
you don't suffer

>>204540267
doubtful. wanking makes me even more miserable and suicidal. i dont know what an asmr gf is but if its anything to do with actual women they dont want anything to do with me.

Never get these runts going oh bloo bloo I have nothing aaaaaaaa
That's great, having nothing and no one expecting anything from you is total freedom, you can be a complete dole scrounger just enjoying your days down spoons smoking rollies and supping stellas and enjoying the curry club
Being born into tarqdome comes with serious expectations and responsibility, it is a heavy burden around the neck

>>204540314
yeah you're right, sounds like you should kill yourself

you should, like, maximize your suffering

>>204540299
i only suffer

>>204540328
yes

Sir Dole Scrounger

Going to start buying things from companies with a royal warrant
I WILL buy British
I WILL pay extra for the privilege
and I WILL be happy

>>204540326
blog on you boring bastard

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somali women look like THAT?

>>204540091
The line...went down?

Imaginal DIsk. Nice album

relying on the gov for money is losing
relying on a job for money is losing

>>204540359
We must not have been importing enough 'grants

>>204540357
love are maya. magnificent specimen of a woman

This Bluesky thing sounds gayer than Eurovision

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this is bob marley's father

>>204540091
why did all that happen

>>204540129
have you tried JAV? That's like a doorway to an entire new magical realm of depravity

>>204540340
Alri Buddha

>>204540357
member when she was a literal who and appeared on big fat quiz and everyone went cor who's that and suddenly she's on TV constantly

>>204540428
i don't think he ever said that

>>204540357
literally who

hahahaha just thought of a really funny joke

Elon Musk is a janny

>>204540493
blog on, please

>>204540493
lmao

>>204540438
for me it was that peter crouch lockdown thing where she had a tight dress on which showed off her sumptuous arse. i distinctly remember having a wank after seeing that

>>204540503
I will not have a yank tell me what to do in my people's thread. /brit/ for the British (and Aussies)
>>204540512
good one innit lad haha. Love are American brothers me

Listening to music, I am.

gimmicks per capita in /brit/ is lower now than it was almost 10 years ago and that's not even adjusted for inflation
This thread was genuinely one of the prosperous and most influential major generals in the mid 2010s and now it is just a shithole also ran
The quality of posting has declined massively, our real terms gimmicks are completely stagnant, schizos are higher, shitposting reduced, we are hamstrung by jannies, endless wasteful posts, and our threads are full of leeches both foreign and domestic
/brit/ is a carcass and the feast is only just beginning, soon there will only be bones left

alri lads, diarrhoealad here, just done diarrhoea #16 I think but losing track now. just been to the tescos to buy immodiums and electrolyte tablets. hoping that sorts me out as I feel rotten so I do.

Image board, lads

>>204540516
/brit/ is your life

>>204540410
Don't like it
Saw some of it on efukt once
Woman having all these little fish inserted into her anus and then they put a camera in there and placed the live feed right in her face and she was in floods of tears looking at this weird close up of the inside of her rectum with all these little fish packed in there
Didn't find that very wankable

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>>204540554

>>204540553
Yeah you're probably dehydrated lad, drink up and have a load of salt

Been charging my electric car at work for over a year now, toilberg still hasn’t found out about it. I park right at the back of the office and there’s an outdoor three pin plug that never gets used that is quite well hidden by a small wall.

It only recharges the battery by like 20% at best over an 8 hour day but I have a short commute that only uses a few percent there and back depending on the weather so over a whole week I end up with pretty much a full charge, only have to top it up at home if I’m planning a big trip at the weekend

>>204540549
Um diarrhealad is right here
>>204540553

>>204540541
i said please...

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>>204538305

>>204540516
>WE WUZ KANGZ N SHIET

>don't get british cultural references
>nobody responds to them
why don't yanks fuck off

Need a FUCKING HOBBY
ANY FUCKING SUGGESTIONS, LADS?

>>204540634
learn albanian

>>204540634
bouldering

>>204540634
try to eat animals who are alive

>>204540634
archery

>>204540583
aye lad I'm getting on it, got these fizzy red tablets that you drop in a glass of water. doesn't look too appealing I'll be honest but if it helps get me pooing solid poos and feeling normal again then I'm game x

>>204540587
What car do you have?

>>204538883
Phwoar, gworn lad. I hit 150kg for reps yesterday and felt strong

how come tiger woods is one of those niggas who looks Chinese

>>204539353
Genuinely in tears at this post, can't believe it went unnoticed

>>204540580
it's not all weird fetish stuff lad, you've only seen the memes

>>204540677
Full name is Crouching Tiger Woods

>>204540677
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tiger_Woods#Background_and_family

> In 2002, ESPN claimed: "For the record, he is one-quarter Thai, one-quarter Chinese, one-quarter Caucasian, one-eighth African American and one-eighth Native American."

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corring and phwoarring

>>204539445
Love seeing these mongos get absolutely shat on

get your t levels checked if you can't wank it to a crying woman quite frankly

>>204540723
crikey

Been shagging my electric car at work for over a year now, toilberg still hasn’t found out about it. I park right at the back of the office and there’s an electric car shagging spot that is quite well hidden by a small wall.

>>204540752
woke nonsense

Defund the RNLI

>>204540672
Its a Model 3 lad

>>204540779
>>204540766

reckon i should be king

You ever feel like your head's stuck in a tire?

>>204540723
love how even the historically formal and conservative BBC has to allow its presenters to dress like this now because they're terrified of being criticised for "censoring female empowerment" or some bollocks

i have an insatiable hunger for water

I like the idea of riding a motorcycle. How dangeous are they, really?

>>204540815
strange thing to love

>>204540779
It's objectively one of the best electric cars and one of the most important cars ever made but the Model 3 is also such an NPCmobile I can't tell you

You wanna know what I love?

BBC has never been conservative, it shags all races and creeds

>>204540834
Motorcycles aren't dangerous, crashing them is

>>204540776
good post

Why is London Disappearing?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPJti1ASGcc

>>204540834
Death traps mate don't bother

have such a vivid memory of the first time i heard gangnam style (someone played it over their mic while i was playing dayz)
don't know why brainbaum decided that would be a core memory but i can barely remember what i had for dinner a couple days ago

>>204540834
imagine it'd be pretty cold

>>204540834
on today's roads? extremely

sucking a peach iced tea

*weaves in between your posts with an L plate and a just eat box*

Mad how girls can wear yoga pants anywhere now, there was a lass working at Tescohen yesterday with her big fat arse on display. Modernity isn't all bad.

>>204540878
This. Roads are full of absolute mongs these days who have no fucking idea how to drive safely.

anti spam measures working well I see
>>204535853

camel toenail

sucking an electrolyte drink to make up for fluid loss as a result of my horrific 'rrhoea attacks over the last couple of days
it's red, slightly fizzy and grim. shan't be continuing with these once I'm better that much is certain.

got some soup which i might have for me lunch
with a nice bit of bread and salted butter

>>204540850
Don’t really care if some incel on 4chan thinks I’m an “NPC” tbqh lol

>>204540908
kek, don't forget the handlebar mittens lad

>>204540834
very
only takes one mong not really paying attention to pull out in front of you and it's a coin-toss between instant death or quadraspazzed on a lifeglug
my dad's an ex biker and he's got a whole list of mates who've died in crashes

>>204540945
and the brown skin

>>204540925
*spits in it*

Anyone up for a classic /brit/ vax debate?
Diego mate you in, know you're always down for it.

>>204540978
Good morning 190

ive got a passing complexion

the ocean is too deep

Caprinos is just franchised kizza isnt it

Just seen some mongo charging his model 3 at work and laughing manically

>>204540989
Hey dtfic

eating a black person's faeces

>>204541035
Alright

An error has occured in one of your routes.

Detail: redis.nim(122) raiseReplyError
asyncfutures.nim(385) read
asyncfutures.nim(385) read
asyncfutures.nim(385) read
asyncfutures.nim(385) read
Expected "OK" got "PIPELINED"

some spasticsa round when it comes to investing
>just make a 2% gain daily for 2 years bro. you'll be a multi millionaire
ok tell me where the 2% daily gains are without losing your money once in 2 years

Nothing is happening. All happenings have been cancelled forever.

>>204541024
Basically yeah. It’s really nice kizza as well

jewnited states

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this is my world today

expecting to hear my gran has died any moment
surprisingly unaffected by it tbqh

>>204541140
/brit/ is your life every day

>>204540962
corr do me mouth next

>>204541140
Get it tarmac'd

>>204540008
What jobs do nonces do when they get out of prison? Genuinely do they get work or what it’s fascinating to me how anyone could employ

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YORKSHIRE
YORKSHIRE
YORKSHIRE

>>204541062
>he missed out on crypto
ngmi

>>204541165
doing a bit of research for when you're released is it?

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>>204541153
all of my grandparents died when i was young
got no mates either me
DAVINA BRAIN OP

sticking my finger up my jacksie

>>204541176
no i didn't

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>>204541181
Done him

>>204541165
cook, barkeep, actor, etc

>>204541165
There's always work at the BBC

>>204541185
Looking forward to seeing her best bits

fun fact : it's hard to diagnose breast cancer of women with darker skinned breasts

>>204541165
they usually end up unemployable dossers until the reoffend and end up back in prison and the cycle repeats ad nauseam

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need a mini soda gf

GET THE NONCES OUT OF PRISON
GET THEM FAKE DBS CLEARANCE
GET THEM EMPLOYED IN PRIMARY SCHOOLS

>>204541242
How so?

fun fact : nonces are called rock-spiders in australian prison slang as they like to get into little cracks

>>204541165
probably move to a different part of the country, live on bennies because they're unemployable and live in fear of the day the local rorkes on the council estate come round with their spraycans to daub 'nonce' on their doors and windows

Is /brit/ dying

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>>204541278

>>204541375
Yep, thankfully. Been a noticeable decline recently.

had two immodiums and within thirty minutes ejected another pint of searing hot diarrhoea bringing us up to 17 poos

So why even let them out in the first place? Nonces surely have their entire life ruined after conviction, why not just kill themselves?

>>204541282
because people use near infrared light in photoacoustic imaging of cancer tissues
but the loss of near infrared light is higher with darker skin because the light is absorbed by melanins

>>204541266
she looks like she enthusiastically makes herself sexually available to men of subsaharan african descent

getting to level 55 then quitting the new CoD. Too tryhard

So... how's life? What you been up to?

>>204540129
To having porn and stop masturbating, not for any moral reasons. If you come off a masturbation and porn addiction cold turkey, your mind will subconsciously crave and expect sex as part of its daily life, thus you can more easily manifest a gf or sex or something but you’ll have to be painting and wait because it takes a while for your lazy mind to take to such lengths because it’s desperate. Like I mean a month or two months minimum.

got my willy in a vagina

Just reached PRESTIGE 10 lads.

>>204541493
I've been blogging on /brit/ about my acute diarrhoea for the past couple of days now, engagement metrics are looking good x

>>204541418
have you got food poisoning? 17 shits is horrific. your arse must be bleeding and your tummy must be sore. should have had codeine like i told you.

If I don't have a wank I don't watch porn, and if I don't watch porn I don't see any fit birds, so I basically become asexual between wanks. Not ideal I reckon.

>>204541418
love a nice squirty shit

>>204541532
fortunately I'm not suffering too badly, it's just annoying really as I feel poorly and can't do anything except sit in bed. I did think about your codeine thing and funnily enough I have a packet of actual codeine tablets from when I broke my leg but they didn't do anything to bung me up when I was taking them full time so decided against it, hoping the immodiums start working soon.

>>204541418
at what point do you just put on a nappy?

>>204541536
Who elected you judge and jury in the body of a beautiful girl?

>>204541468
don't think so tbqh

so grim in town

i just can't take people seriously who wear "smart watches"

>>204541580
I've shit the bed twice in two days so I was pondering some sort of pseudonappy made of a bin bag and tape in case it happened again since I'm running out of clean bed sheets, in the end I've just decided to stop sleeping in the nip as I usually do and double bag it with pants and pyjama bottoms as an emergency layer

>>204541620
didnt your country invent the smart watch

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The lunch kizza
My day off after all

>>204541634
If this is real then you should go to A&E

>>204541536
I occasionally pass a truly fit bird in the wild, like once a month or so, and I get all hot and bothered and keep staring at them

>>204541536
i have to watch straight porn once a fortnight because im afraid of turning into a complete sissy

>>204541658
Peng

>>204541493
loads of stuff. dont want to upset all the misanthropic incels here though

>>204541658
the runtius maximus, the king of slop

>>204541680
I'm not going to hospital to tell the doctor I've got the squits m8

>>204541620
same. its npc behaviour. i also cant take anyone wearing a gaudy watch seriously. 95% oof watch wearers are wankers.

>>204541658
absolutely grim

>>204541658
Grim

>>204541703
Gwan lad, might do them good to see that doing stuff is indeed possible

>>204541774
>>204541620
how about exercise trackers, are they okay

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>>204541700
>>204541721
>>204541776
>>204541789
imbeciles

>>204541828
Your point?

have you looked at the weather next week? the temperate is plummeting. think ill go out this weekend then as i dont really want to be walking around in 5c weather.

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>>204541828

>>204541828
>Donna Pizza
I think I went to school with her

Got a competition this weekend, bit nervous

>>204541828
still grim thougheverbeit

>>204541865
Just wear a coat you mong

>>204541865
just means my incelwalks will be quicker

>>204541875
relax lad, just remember to use plenty of lube

Wonder what he meant by that "joke"

I reckon I could pull Sydney Sweeny if we met irl

>>204541915
dont have a proper coat.

>>204541956
Isn't she irish diaspora? You'd better be brown

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on the ol' 'roin

>>204541978
pop down the charity shops, should be something warm enough

god i really need to live somewhere where it's sunny all the time. i look awful and ghostly without a tan.

Learn to build cabins in the snow

imagine a japanese person trying to pronounce "honorary aryan"

>>204542048
Just do a winter holiday lad

>>204542048
fuck off we're full

>>204540129
I exclusively masturbate via facetiming women I met online (usually Tinder) and wanking off together.

>>204542055
they have a problem with l's not r's

>>204542093
Well you don't, so

Oh my days

Ho your nights

>>204542048
this explains my cuteness

>>204542120
what's the matter, Cregg?

what abhuge waste fof t8m life is

>>204542100
It will never cease to amaze me how the most mundane shite will be declared a myth and an impossibility by lads on /brit/. It's so fucking weird lol

rey rave roblem rith rels not rars

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erryting gwan be alree

katy is excited for the weekend

>>204542055
there are no japanese people

>>204542145
ok pal

>>204542151
alri scoob

>>204542143
Nothing, I just wanted to post that to see what it feels like

>>204542055
アナラリーアリアン

>>204540129
time to graduate to real degenerate shit like piss and fisting

>>204542145
Ah yes, the most everyday mundane shite like wanking on facetime to women in your area

oh piss off you fat wanker

>>204542209
apologise for darwin bombings

>>204542209
and a ching chong nip nong to you tpo mate

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>>204541828

>>204542205
how was it?

going to become self employed

Drinking coffee from my $100000000000000 mug

love love LOVE "Ah yes" posting

>>204542216
wanking over cam with strangers online is absolutely mundane. you've heard of omegle, surely?

first brew of the day and it lush

Mental how you could go to the docs in the early 21st century and he would recommend taking up smoking and prescribe you cocaine

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the cronem getting shape-ups

quite enjoying the new cod

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>wanking over cam with strangers online is absolutely mundane.

>short eastern european girl at always goes on break with the tall dude old enough to be her dad
you just know...

first poo of the day and it lush

aig

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cronem gettin his shape-up

>>204542288
Hey mate got plans tonight?

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>>204542222
you mean apologise for making this kind of propaganda

staying off the vapes for a bit me coughing lungs up

>>204542235
I felt like Danny from Rate My Takeaway.

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cronem got the fresh waves

Kizza is a great gimmick to be honest

>>204542330
CORR

>>204542359
Shut the fuck up Spainigger lmfao

>>204542330
screaming

moving in with my gf to our new home :)
life is good haha

fucking motherfucking cockersucker aaaaAAAAA

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waves looking brazy
beard game silly

>>204542400
hope this post really hurts the incel freaks

i might start doing correct grammar and punctuation

>>204542400
>moving in with my gf
this doesn't happen. stop lying on /brit/

>>204542330
Is the bottom pic showing an aussie deserting so he can stalk the outback to rape boongs??

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mmhmm get yo locks done yung nyukka

>>204542209
ありがとう desu

>>204542438
no

>>204542400
ktim about a month and a half ago looking forward to the future with the gf now im alone with no gf no mates or prospects

right this poo was a non-starter, think I'm going to give in for now
constipationberg got me on the ropes

>>204542469
Well you didn't, so

>>204542457
you are mentally disabled

>>204542330
This was Japanese propaganda

Spainfreak, Heathermong and the Belgian all trapped in an old Mondeo that's about to be put through a car crusher
Ah, yes, lovely

>>204542418
>using blood and crip slang interchangeably
you're so white it hurts

diego come home

>>204542513
>Spainfreak, Heathermong and the Belgian
The cronem

Yeah 190 get your Diego LARP fired up
It is Friday after all

>>204542469
used to sympathise with you but you've been such an annoying prick with the non-stop blogging despite every cunt here telling you to fuck off, im glad its happened to you and im glad you're hurting. fuck you.
im imagine you being an obnoxious and obstinate prick is what got your arse dumped in the first place. and you've learnt nothing. pathetic

>>204542514
cronem is not crip slang silly man

>someone mentions something even tangentially related to being sexual or romantic with women
>a half dozen posts come flooding in saying that never happened
do these people not know that /brit/ is a normie general?

>>204542438
Think it's showing aussies in Papau New Guinnea
But it looks like he's having as much fun with the natives as the yank so not sure how this is supposed to convince him not to go

>>204542547
okay incel

>>204542567
Ah yes wanking to strangers on facetime, very much "normie" behaviour

>and I see here you've been unemployed for a few years, may I ask what you were doing during that time?
>Uhh yeah, see me and da cronem...

MIGHT have to move back in with mumberg again lads

Would love to go for a pint with spaino

one lads got the shits and another lads got constipation
the duality of man

>>204542594
enjoy your shitty christmas ALONE loool

>>204542558
Yes it is you fucking idiot
You're cringe as fuck for LARPing as a gangbanger but you're also retarded

>>204542547
incel meltie

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>>204542507
true, i meant he should demand apology for that instead of some irrelevant city bombing

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cronem thinking about dem backshots he boutta give

>>204542606
what are you on about

>>204542633
you have such a sad life man

>>204542631
wankin to this

what we saying lads? Is it a fish day or a shit day for are Mark?

>>204542681
>>204542681
>>204542681

is /brit/ wheelchair accessible?

>>204542691
no i threw the ramp in the river

The last /brit/ :skull: