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hello /brit/
i would like to inform you that i just finished my wank

My tongue is a blade and my posts be ready to clap

>>214365050
post the results

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Palma, Mallorca, 1950 and 2025

>>214365087
well it's in a tissue at the moment

how's the weather in the UK

Bonjour.

>>214365127
starting to get rainy again
feels like summer is ending

>>214365138
salut :D

completely forgot about my pecorino
spent like a tenner on some cheese and then didn't have anyh with my nice pasta thatg i specifically bought it for

>>214365122
would love to wipe my nose on it

>>214365171
dodged a bullet
pasta is goyslop

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g3Xc4b9NpPY&list=RDg3Xc4b9NpPY&start_radio=1

>>214365184
i still ate the pasta just without any nice cheese on

>>214365193
''''''

>>214365180
grotty

so glad i'm not a woman, the worst thing that can happen to me is being sent to war, and even then i can just hide in a cave and tug myself off until it's over

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“Too much sanity may be madness — and maddest of all:

to see life as it is, and not as it should be!”

- Don Quixote

apparently there is healthy cholestrol and mine is right on the borderline of being low

Keir Starmer is a Jewish ethno-supremacist (despite marrying into the tribe) who despises England and its indigenous people. Why is he their prime minister?! In a fair world, the St George flag would fly and Starmer and his family would be deported to Israel.

>>214365227
i curse god every day for not making me a woman

got the Mysterious Dystopian Sleep Ambience - Post Apocalyptic Ambient Music on
perfect for my incel command centre

>>214365249
being a woman is probably great until you're around 30 (maybe 35 if you're lucky) but then after that it's a nightmare

Kurwa bober

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1:30 and can’t sleep

Luckily Monday is Labor Day so I have another day to do nothing but play wow

>>214365261
I think being an alchy power mom volleyball coach there's something to that

>>214365264
funny ahh video

Public Service Broadcasting (PSB) Group Expenditure — £4,024 million

This includes content creation, operational support, and other key costs.

Direct Content Spend — £2,969million

Radio: £507million

BBC Online & Red Button: £239million

News & Current Affairs: £321million

Entertainment & Comedy: £241million

Factual & Learning: £271million

Arts & Music: £34million

Film & Drama: £391million

Sport Production: £67million

Children’s: £92million

Orchestras & Performing Groups: £29million

Welsh‑language programmes for S4C: £22million

Development Spend: £91million

BBC World Service (grant): £101million

World Service operating licence: £233million

National Audit Office (NAO)
+1
www.ofcom.org.uk
ICAEW
+5
National Audit Office (NAO)
+5
National Audit Office (NAO)
+5

Other PSB Costs:

Distribution costs: £208million

Content & distribution support: £482million

General support (overheads): £165million

PSB pension deficit reduction payment: £41million

Restructuring costs: £30million

Costs to generate non‑licence fee income: £209million

Other service spend: £476million

Other television content spend: £330million

Licence‑fee collection costs: £145million

Monitoring: £10million

i like playing and having fun

>>214365319
i like playing with my toys

need to go grocery shopping but i'm too drunk to drive

>>214365342
Ok? Shut up

Unc don't know about Instacart
You can order groceries like doordash if you're comfortable with a stranger handling everything that you're going to eat

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going to move to new england soon

Looking back on my photos with me mum and can clearly see my cock and balls in the tight fitting flared pants I used to wear.

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>>214365417

just had a wank

>>214365339
same

adults should be allowed toys and to play

>>214364950
no

just got today's bandle (very hard par 5) in one guess haha hahahaha HAHAHAHAHAHA

>>214365509
they are you big dummy

got connections with no mistakes again as usual also and got purple first :)

>>214365614
Impressive. Very nice

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>>214365614
yeah

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>>214365448
i suffer in texas

>>214365655
look at my FLAG and be thankful

National Health Service stalks Penelope and her family and gives Mother her death certificate although she's still alive, and attempts to capture her with a net. Mother wanders away from her family, slips into Shelter Man's home, and transforms into a cupboard.

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At Vodafone, our aim is to create a digital society that includes everyone and helps protect the planet. We believe superfast connectivity and technology is the key to unlocking the UK’s potential. We’re connecting people, businesses, and communities, so everyone can tap into the benefits of a digital society.
#TheNationsNetwork

>>214365575
there should be parks for adults to run and play

>>214365655
they honestly look indian

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So we will press on with developing clear, compelling and consistent UK offers, tailored to their needs and our strengths, spanning trade, development, defence, cyber security, technology, climate change and environmental protection. Because we know that in the coming decades there will be economic shocks, and climate change will have its baleful effects, and countries will want technology, finance and access to markets to support their development.

>>214365767
there are you big dummy

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Get the small boats ON our shores
Get the migrants IN our women

the missus told me tiktok told her mr trump got 6 months to live yesterday

>>214365787
no there aren’t
i want to go on slide

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Migrants' bellies full.
Migrants' bollocks empty.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zg4o54XxZns
how do you know that

migrants gone
my belly full
my belly suspiciously migrant shaped

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Imagine if our Pakistanis and Indians were like this.

made my coffee

can i ask what the fuck you're doing up at this time i thought i'd be the only person here surprised /brit/ is even on

I genuinely have so many questions about the spammer that I would love to know the answers to
Why Shell? Why Hublot? Why Ciroc?
Why does he start every single one of his spamming sessions with these bizarre marketing copypastas?
What is it about the Gherkin that is so interesting? Is it the phallic shape? Does it link directly to BBC?
Why does he choose a Belgian flag? And what devices does he use to do his double act on his, presumably, original UK IP address when it seems like two of them are working together?
Why did he become fixated on the word 'Cronem'?
Why did he choose 'Katy' as a name for a white british girl when that is a north american version of that name?
Why is he obsessed with James Cleverly?
Why does he go to the trouble of making sure every single image he uses has a matching piece of text - not a single image is ever posted without the appropriate text that goes with it. It is meticulously planned and he likely has some sort of spreadsheet or management system for this in place.
What is his relationship with previous spammers with similar output such as the 'does his blackness make you feel less than' guy, and heathermong?
What is his relationship to cloggy, who disappeared as he appeared?

YESSSSSSSS
HERE WE FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
SHELL GO PERKS!
CIROC VODKA!
JAMES CLEVERLY!!!!
TIMMIES!!!!
KATY!!!!
THE CRONEM!!!!!!
S-CURVED BATONS!!!!!
THE GHERKIN!!!!!
IT IS TIME!!!! IT IS THE TIME OF DAY!!!! FINALLY IT IS HERE!!!!

>>214365836
*knocks it over onto your lap*
oh whoops sorry mate

>>214365842
i've been up since half five like every other day

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>>214365842
got toil in roughly an hour

>>214365884
it's actually sunday mate

>>214365664
i enjoy this

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>>214365866
LET'S GOOOO

>>214365846
why don’t you come up with questions for some bitches for once in your miserable incel life

>>214365846
he is an autistic man whose brain has been turned into sludge by prolonged internet exposure

>>214365893
what kind of revolver can fire more than 6 times

>>214365930
i assume it's a bb gun, one assumes this would be a wildly dangerous spectator sport with real guns

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I always wanted to fuck the muses from hercules

did you know that jenny fabian transferred syd barrett's dna into andy summers

'keets are too loud

>>214365892
I didn't click because of the face but thanks to you enjoying it I enjoyed too

>>214365943
now you mention it yeah it was quite a silly assumption that it was a real gun aha x

white people don’t care about gaza enough

>he didn't filter the Belgian flag literal years ago
ngmi

and she'll eat food,
she will wee, poo,
all the damn time just to be rude,
she's enormous,
and she knows just what it, takes to break a toilet,
she's got many rolls of that soft ply,
she's got wetted baby wipes

>>214365804
you can you big dummy

>>214365874
Got toil

>>214365954
ah so that's the origin of my black qween fetish

>>214366022
wow

>>214366022
this is your masterpiece

Haven't watched porn since the online safety act and honestly it hasn't made any difference. NoFap is a sham.

>>214366054
i was forced to stop after i was caught circumventing the rules regarding identity verification

veggie jambalaya for tea perhaps

i said i was FORCED to STOP WANKING by the GOVERNMENT

>>214366071
forrin muck

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>>214366078

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this image pops up when I search for jenny fabian
idk

>>214366078
if the government tried to staff me i'd walk right into westminster palace and shove the black rod up my arse while spaffing all over the speaker's seat

i want to kiss a girl who looks like me

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we ain't goin' to heaven

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That last sentence caught me off guard.

I do miss peter banks

>>214366107
put a wig on and snog a mirror

>>214366107
t. Narcissus

>>214366117
>>214366096
>>214365965
MATE what are you doing?

Just done a very spicy poo arsehole is on fire

>>214366114
why are the star trek people always perverts?

>>214366114
i saw the other pics of her and her ass is not out of this world
she's just fat

>>214366139
it's fine

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they had us in the first half

do you think jim morrison was a good lyricist?
be honest
do you find that his words resonate with you?
be honest now

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>>214366153
where? just so i know what "out of this world" means when a quirk chungus into swinging says it

>>214366206
I was into 60s and 70s rock when I was younger but doesn't do anything for me now.

>>214366206
i'm sure that a few of the lads in here find that "show me the way to the next little girl" from whiskey bar reallt resonates with them

i walk around like gay nigga finger on the trigger if

>>214366231
what happened to you?

Is this what rorke has brought us to? Acting like Yanks having hundreds of flags lined up and down every street? It's tacky, cringe and yankified.
Someone put up flags all over my town yesterday and it just looks cheap and shit. I don't get it.

>>214366256
Started playing the piano 8 years ago and now I only listen to classical.

>>214366264
Noticed this yesterday while driving through two villages I stopped at off the M5. Assume it's everywhere now.

roke buying red ready mix paint from The Works

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he has though

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>>214366152

>>214366271
thoughts on this Brazilian rock comedy band?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1WjI3DLOk4c

i was born in the wrong generation
unironically

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I just love them so much

>>214366328
If only I could understand.

>>214366324
I like this man

i am demonically possessed, and that's a good thing!

tony kaye's shirt is covered in hearts <3 <3 <3 <3 *sobbing*

Happy with the generation I was born in. Grew up on pre-smartphone days but still had access to the internet. Zoomers are fucked from TikTok and YouTube brainrot, and boomers got brainwashed by television and advertising.

>>214366324
disgusting freaks
every time I see one crawling on the walls or ceilings I want to kill them

>>214366335
would you have preferred to have been born in 1900or so, being a dapper hoodlum like the lads in peaky blinders?

apparently there is some civil unrest in this country? protests and all that? not sure what it's about, something related to immigrants and boats.

>>214366372
>Zoomers are fucked from TikTok and YouTube brainrot
ktim

>>214366207
probably had her cucked gimp of a partner compliment her fat arse so much she started to believe it was something special

>>214366362
shh
shh shh
wait

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>>214366350

>>214366377
would prefer to have been born sometime before the 2000s

>>214366379
wait until you hear about the anti genocide protests that the media refuse to report on

>>214366376
bad

>>214366401
like me? i was born in 1995 and my life is SHIT and probably not dissimilar from yours

>>214366405
try dealing with them in hot climates
they are everywhere disgust me

>>214366404
that is something i can conclude logically without having to read anything since if it involves israel you won't hear about it unless it's to brand it as anti semetic.

>>214366415
yeah
i might have been able to escape my internet addiction if i'd been born earlier

>>214366439
I am in a hot climate
I'm near one of the hottest places in the world
and there are lizards everywhere here
I love them
and you are bad

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how does this make you feel?

>>214366484
get
him
shagged

>>214366451
i think internet addiction comes from us all unless you died before the internet existed, my mum is a literal boomer and spends all day watching youtube while playing mobile games

>>214366484
wish i was dead flexible like that

>>214366484
quite impressed, but don’t understand why’d he have to be so gay about it

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fuck incels

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>>214366484
zesty ass mf
>>214366471
some people have phobias of spiders, I have of lizards
can't help it
our are disgusting looking too just like the people

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might go back to the gym

>>214366508
lol the old man is just like "Why are people yelling at me"

>>214366523
spiders and lizards are beautiful calm down

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>>214366523
lizards a qt

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>>214366538
>>214366539
they are haram

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>>214365115
All thanks to British tourism, but the ungrateful fucks will never admit it

>>214366528
CUTE!!!!

>>214366528
I want 2 b baby sloth
I want 2 lie on mum sloth's tummy

>>214366539
poor babby dunno where he goin

>>214366549
mate with core energy like that she could crush your head like a watermelon

>>214366484
feel like I should've continued in ballet and yoga

>>214366508
Well that slag ain't getting a tip

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>>214366391
you saying charles is lizard?

>>214366508
birth rate down
sex rate down
divorces up
it’s a head scratcher

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just found out about this creature
the silky anteater
bizarre

>>214366649
ai slop

>>214366650
let him eat your ants

why do browns hate animals so much?

>>214366671
racist ignorant nonsense

>>214366671
self loathing

>>214366619
what an inbred little freak

https://help.bethesda.net/#en/answer/52842

Okay gotcha.

https://youtu.be/IbeqVrIcn0c?si=ZRkJGonmI9s3uCwy
todays wake up song

hes here
camden paki is here

need to stop wanking, it's just water at this point

>>214366700
you sound a little bit envious

Lord Jesus you have revealed yourself as the way to the Father
Kyrie, Kyrie eléison

You have poured out on your people the spirit of truth
Christe, christe eléison

You are the Good Shepherd leading us to eternal life.
Kyrie, Kyrie eléison
May Almighty God have mercy on us, negate us our sins and bring us all to everlasting life
Amen

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>>214366662
yea?

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imagine being a spanish explorer and seeing this thing for the first time

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>>214366722

>>214366733
cute greyhound

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(◡‿◡)

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>>214366722
hammerhead mustve been hungry that day

>>214366732
yeah

>>214366733
bet their first thought way "was does this fella taste like"

how does the bbc have a budget on 5 billion quid and produce such shit content?

>>214366739
saw a normal looking family with a toddler in a pushchair with one of those fuckoff huge bullies unmuzzled and wondered what possessed them to get a dog like that instead of a labrador or a spaniel

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such a strange animal

so reckon the dj khaled fella is either a very elaborate character he plays or actually functionally retarded

another breakfast in front of the 'puter, must have done this thousands of times

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>>214366666

>>214366771
ktim

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>>214366762
all animals are little weirdos

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u7KncmJj82

>>214366743
>produce such shit content
Eastenders?

love children, me

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reading a book

>>214366539
me in the off license looking for crisps while pissed as a fart at 2am

>>214366799
off to see my nieces soon

>>214366785
love animals
all of them

>>214366799
in what way?

>>214366829
corrrr

>>214366797
yes thats a good example

>>214366799
in a nice way or are you a nonce

>>214366850
nothing wrong with eastenders

>>214366757
it's a fashion/status thing that only lower class runty types possess

>>214366829
>>214366846
>>214366855
look at the fucking state of you lot you pornsick little freaks, roll on the Online Safety Act if this is how much damage its caused

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Catberg on a mad one

>>214366891
looks evil ngl

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>>214366891

>>214366884
it's not normal to just announce that you love kids you know

>>214365228
Don Quixote is shit

eating a orange

>>214366829
ever hug them up the body?

errr just have a normal one ffs

>>214366908
that indicates a nerve problem I believe

Been doing naked yoga at home lads
Feels VERY nice

>>214366933
think they're being retarded
trying to scratch the other side of their face

i'm not going to masturbate until 2026
decision made

plotting a dastardly wank

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>>214366722

>>214366850
I like downton abbey but Im not sure if its made by bbc or itv

>>214366732
>>214366649
>no nudes
why bother

>>214366891
I click on this thumbnail and it froze my computer

can anyone advise me on if getting starlink is worth it

Off to church shortly
Which is to say I'll be leaving soon
No that I'll be going in a bad mood

>>214366732
>>214366649
Do zoomers really

>>214366963
>>214366964
dichotomy

Looks like a beautiful day to hold in my peripheral vision through the window whilst I sit in one spot on the sofa and shitpost on /brit/

>>214366946
no it's not "autism" or "being retarded"
it's a nerve issue

>>214366735
I can't forgive these guys after what they did to Steve Irwin

>>214366990
what's on the reading today

Wish some benevolent billionaire would gift me a lifetime OSRS membership because I only get to play about one weekend a month but I really enjoy it, just don't think it's worth that price for the short amount of time I get to enjoy it

i just, scranned a shiiiite,
it'sa simple, wooah,
i just, scranned a shiiihiiiite,
woooooooaaaah

>>214367007
Can't tell you till I get back can I

justoff a 3 dayer for calling an uppity irishman a nigger

>>214367001
what are you like a fucking cat doctor
fucking neek

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mad the way the best christmas film ever is british

paddy mcaloon is a cute name isn't it

>>214367019
ah John 16:12 a classic

>>214367027
um thats not a poster for die hard!!! xD

started raping and i've been getting way more pussy than i ever got before

>>214367029
it is

>>214367056
oh god! meant rapping! so soz!

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>>214367027
No, it's American

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>>214367047

i am plagued by 'tism

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>>214367027
sybau

>>214367027
I miss the early 2000's when Americans still thought we're a bunch of buttoned up, slightly awkward but ultimately charming middle class types

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watched loads of air crash investigation videos where everyone always ends up dying horribly in a giant fireball and feel a bit glum as a result so now i've queued up all the hopefuel episodes where no one dies

deport all whites and non-whites

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>>214367052
>>214367073

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>>214367073

>>214367112
where are we going

>>214367089
Nah this isn't even close, Arnold Schwarzenegger plays a good little goy who needs to win his sons affection by purchasing a toy all while his overtly Jewish neighbour tries to fuck his wife

The entire film is a retelling of Jacob and birthright of Esau and the passing of white civilisation to the black man
You see in the closing scene where the white child passes the turbo man toy (meant to be a symbol of white civilisation) to the black man

>>214367052
>>214367073
Bruce absolutely eviscerated this nonce before the thought even entered his head. Surgical dispatch.

>>214367098
love actually is a properly british film it became popular internationally because it is the best christmas film ever made

>>214367114
my post was clearly sarcastic you illiterate jackanape

Rorke ruining his Nan's last christmas at home before she goes into the hospice with a stunning takedown of the film Jingle All The Way

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What in god's name have I done

>>214367153
grow up

>>214367127
don't care. get out

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The thinking man's favourite Christmas film

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>>214367171
>Jim Hardy, Ted Hanover, and Lila Dixon have a popular New York City song and dance act. On Christmas Eve, Jim prepares for his final performance before marrying Lila and retiring to a farm in Connecticut. Lila tells Jim she has fallen in love with the notorious charmer Ted instead; heartbroken, Jim bids them goodbye.

...

>>214367187
Good film but not as good as IAWL

quick poo then run toil for me

>>214367128
the film is clearly based on Vedic blood memories, true Aryan patriots relinquishing the material and ascending to the Godhead

my fav xmas film is elf XD

>>214367157
looks like something from the seminal 1997 horror film 'cube'

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Rorke insisting that good things aren't good because he is determined to be different and edgy

Brother always wants to watch some woke shite at Christmas
He put on "Klaus" the other year and it was wank

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>>214367195

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>>214367157
looks like lissajous

>>214367197
Enjoy ruining your joints. You'll be in a wheelchair by the time you're 40.

>>214367208
alri tom rowsell lad
your sister's well fit

>>214367219
My bedsheets after a £6.50 large mixed donner and chips

>>214367235
fuck off wannabe bumhole expert

>>214367171
>pretends to like le silent generation films

fuck off

>>214367235
id rather be fit and in a wheelchair than a miserable fat cunt

>>214367246
yay!

>>214366114
open relationships simply cannot lead to anything but jealousy and pain after some time

>>214367171
you should watch meet john doe

>>214367263
you'll have popeye arms and astronimically high blood pressure but at least your calves will look good for a few months

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>>214367254
>silent generation films
>has talking

>>214367294
oh behave x

>>214367213
it's a great action film it doesn't have a christmas aesthetic, it's not fun to watch with the whole family, it's not warm, it's christmas setting doesn't really affect the film. it's not a christmas film is anything other than the 'um achkullay' way it's reddit.

>>214366114
looks like a turk with his new circassian concubine

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can anyone please help me post a thread? for some reason I'm not allowed to post a thread. Here is the text:

I need to get the fuck out of my parents house and start my life as far away as I can from here.

Can any of you give me some advice? I have a little bit of money (like $1000), is there any country I can fly to, get a job, start working/living there with a somewhat decent quality of life?

Ideally a part time job?

upload any random pic i don't care

>>214367294
he watches it on mute

>>214367309
start a new life with £750? it's not the 18th century lol

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>>214367246

gib gub

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So this is modern Britain

>>214367309
>I need to get the fuck out of my parents house
why?
I'd live with my mother till either of us is dead, even after I get married

>>214367324
honestly anon I don't really care I'm going to leave

>>214367350
I just hate being here and I'm stagnating. I have to go

>>214367309
not making a post where i claim to have any """""dollars""""", sorry

>>214367344
filled with brown ppl like every other place on this god forsaken planet

>>214367359
>>214367359
>>214367359

NEW

>>214367361
>>214367361
>>214367361

>>214367344
by mine there is some union jacks and one random flag that says 'jesus is king' kek

>>214367157
You have released gxctlquallltqumira