rorke using push to talk

>>221142602
Fully understood what black people mean about white people after taking hallucinogens

rorke still getting 10 quid top ups

millennials literally have higher t than zoomers btw

queen camilla titwank

It's quiet, too queit

>>221142647
scream

>>221142701
nice link stupid mong

>>221142694
We are all in here watching gay porn
>>>/gif/30593735
>>>/gif/30593735
>>>/gif/30593735

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>>221142530
Actually she has a white daughter with a black 'dad who stepped up'

I've Got 1000 Shabana Mahmood Sex Arses Stuck in a Lorry in the Strait of Hormuz

who is that fat english bloke with the curly hair who talks about marketing tricks
he seems like a bullshit artists to me

>>221142638
what do you mean

>>221140698
>>221140698
>>221140698
early new

>>221142713
>>221142719
right well

>gf angry at me for not doing more about wedding planning
>she's just spam emailing venues that look like shit/are way too expensive and stressing out about buying random crap for the engagement party we don't need like electric candles and glow sticks
>does nothing in her wfh job anyway so she's doing it all in work hours
Didn't think marriagetoil would be this much fucking hard work

Never watched Tracy Beaker or any of that CBBC shite
Had a Sky subscription you see

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>>221142719
lest we forget

>>221142716
rory sutherland

*pops the snooker on*

Have a black coworker obsessed with talking about BBC which he refers to as “shango stick” and today he’s been going around asking coworkers what they’d do if they came home to their wives “being anointed by some shango stick”

>>221142719
Wtf is this board

told the toilfu I pictured her dad as Bernard Manning and she didn't find it funny

I'm a Cambridge Uni drop out

listening to the new Kneecap album, good craic

>>221142762
Absolutely deranged fantasy, please seek therapy

>>221142781
Top of the mornin to ya, my name is Ken Flanagan

brother loves complaining about not being able to get jobs and then logging on to his public full name visible x account where he machine guns Yeah Baby and Hi Sexy replies to porn bots all day

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got your tickets lads?

>>221142432
>Spy Kids in 240p
why in 240p?

>>221142822
would rather stick my willer in a dead badger

>>221142822
dead civilization

mental how shit the many saints of newark is think its the worst film ive ever seen in my life just goes to show that david chase is a hack and the sopranos was the sum of its parts

The piss nettles and bleach combination is almost ready

>>221142822
why is this allowed and why hasnt she been chucked into a mental asylum yet

>>221142822
I like the other one that's actually pretty, forgot her name.

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>Tracy Beaker finally settles down to a normal life with her 10-year-old daughter Jessica "Jess" Beaker. Then into their lives comes Sean Godfrey, an ex-footballer who becomes Tracy's new boyfriend.

>>221142822
Buy an ad

>>221142822
can't really complain about being a virgin nowadays can we

I'm a 34 year old gay virgin who shall be having gay sex with 48 year old block paver tonight
Can't deny my desire any fucking more, tried to be normal but I'm a gay, I'm a fucking gay bender.

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>>221142854
hmm, it doesnt look like tracy has aged all that much over the past 20 or so years. I wonder what her secret is.

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>>221142822

>>221142822
You can't suffer on England.

>>221142854
Don't start with this man
You were doing so well these past few days

>>221142822
imagine how red raw her fanny is after a sesh

*sells weapons to both rorke and leftypol and makes off like a bandit*

hehehe lads

>>221142803
Dead fucking serious this has been happening today lol

The thing about it is that if you’re a man here and you go to HR for anything the whole company thinks you’re a pussy, only women and the one tranny that works here go to HR. Tranny goes for any reason so nobody talks to it, it got someone in trouble once for telling it that it’s wiring was out of compliance and needed to be fixed

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It's fokin ready mates, dig in

>>221142854
didnt have tracy beaker getting her hairy quim BLACKED on my 2026 bingo card

>>221142877
she certainly got fat thoughbeit

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>>221142854
>Jess and Tracy Beaker are loving their new life by the seaside, but the arrival of teenage runaway Jordan is about to change everything for the Beaker Girls

45 minute cycle to leisure center
40 minute swim
45 minute cycle back home
Now absolutely fucked with zero motivation to do anything.
Not sure it was worth it

>>221142918
*snatches the whole thing in my talons and flies off*

add "ex-footballer" to the list if it isn't there already

Self harm time :(

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It’s Friday and I’m NOT going to drink beer this weekend!!

>>221142854
it's not even the BMWF aspect here that gets me, it's the implication that a single mother that looks like that could land a rich, tall, handsome BF

Self-ham time :) (i'm going to eat some ham)

>>221142957
I don't believe you

>>221142957
Why not?

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>>221142937
Nooo you have to share

more like Tracy Bleaker

burber gurrently being cooking
on its eay in earlyca 10 2-2 minutes

>>221142854
Thanks for basically copying my post >>221142714

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>>221142946
Add “19 year old freshman” to the list while you’re at it

might actually clean the flat this weekend

got sod all else to do

in my glow up era lads

Just sneezed

>>221142978
I’m on tirzepatide and losing weight!

had a mate who was run over and killed when he was 22 and his mum still 10 years later sees me as a substitute son
happy to distract her from it, but it's still very painful and awkward even after all this time

>>221143004
blog on

>>221143009
How fat are you?

mental how easy it is to give heathermong a new special interest so long as you link a black man to it somehow lmao

>>221142822
I went to university in Swansea.
Imagining meeting her to lose virginity.

>>221143027
ok, so i'm losing some weight and growing my hair out for a new hair style

>>221143043
6’2 230

Just trying to get to about 190

>>221143052
Leave him alone

meep meep

>>221143026
have you ever shag 'er up 'er arse lad

>>221143052
why do you call him heathermong

Search is full of ads and wrong answers. Every other email is an ad. Prime Video charges you and shows ads. Paramount? Ads. Peacock? YouTube? Hulu? Ads followed by more ads. Netflix full of ads. Meta and X, every other thing is an ad. Pinterest is nothing but ads. AI is in everything. AI finishes sentences incorrectly and won’t stop. AI reads your email and search history to target you with more ads. Every time you open an app or visit a site there’s an update making it worse. In a hurry? First, click here to agree to terms you don’t have time to read and must accept. You need an account to do that. Change your temporary password. Enter your 2FA code. Check your email and enter that code. Now use a passkey. Your password is too simple to remember. Change it. No, not like that. Now log on. Enter your 2FA code. Check your email for a code… Welcome back! We’ve updated our terms of service and privacy policy (you have none). Subscribe to the site. Subscribe to Netflix. Subscribe to toilet paper. Subscribe to these groceries. Pay a membership fee for the right to subscribe then tip your driver who delivers the subscriptions your membership lets you subscribe to. Time to work? We’ve got to update your laptop and will slow down everything you do until you agree to update. But first, click here to agree. Update installed — your laptop’s broken now. It doesn’t matter, since your boss just replaced you with AI. Go to your phone to complain on social media. Wait, your phone needs an update so we can add more AI. Click here. Oh sorry, your phone can’t handle this update. Now it’s useless. Go get the newest phone. Here’s a text from a friend, an email, a voice mail they left three days ago but you didn’t see until now because of sync problems with the cloud. It’s their GoFundMe. Their MLM. Their Patreon. Never mind, you didn’t respond to their text within 9 minutes and now you’re no longer friends. They blocked you. Make new friends.

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>>221143073

>>221143068
Why not just diet and exercise? 40 lbs doesn't seem like a lot

rorke pretending his lunch banana is a gun

>>221143076
Nah, but I did end up with his sister for a while.

*Rorke in hospital, on his deathbed*
Nurse: Mr. Rorke, there's a visitor here to see you.
Rorke: A visitor? Must be one of my mates from the Homeland Party group chat on X or someone from the London Dimes Square adjacent alt-lit scene.
*Leftypol emerges from the doorway with a Terry's Chocolate Orange tucked under his arm*
Rorke: Well I never...
Leftypol: I know you always liked these...
*Leftypol places the Chocolate Orange on Rorke's table*
Rorke: Thanks...
*Leftypol sits next to Rorke on his bed, smiling at one another, tears in their eyes*

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>>221143087
Download this app to find people in your area. In your neighborhood. On your street. Two doors down from you. Do you know this person yet, we think you’d get along. You need an account to use this app. That username is taken. Enter a password. Not that one, you used it on another site. You need to be connected to WiFi to download the app. Allow the app to connect to other devices on your network. Allow the app to access your contacts, know your precise location, store your credit card details. Oops, sorry, we got hacked now all that info is available on the web. There’s a class action suit. You can join. It’ll take a decade to get your $3.73 share of the ten billion settlement. We’ll send it via PayPal or deposit it to your bank, just tell us those details. Oh no, another hack. That info is circulating now, too. Here’s a spam call, a spam email, a spam text. Why are you angry? Why are you talking about getting rid of your phone? Why don’t you like AI, it lets us make all of this easier? Do you know how ridiculous that sounds? This is progress. You’ll be left behind. Do you want to be left behind? Do you???

where were you when you first saw barts penis in the simpsons movie

>>221143115
Cinema.
What a daft question.

>>221143115
in the cinema

>>221143115
Never watched the Simpsons, it was dubbed here when I was a kid and I don't like dubbed stuff.

>>221143026
I lost a close friend when he was 26 and it's been 12 years. It doesn't hurt when I think about him unless I linger on it for too long and start thinking about how he was the best of us and wondering what he'd be doing today. Can't imagine what it must be like to lose a child. You'd spend the rest of your fucking life thinking about their potential, or I would anyway.

waiting here for my wendy burger

rorke doing a perfect nyancat

>>221143110
>We're not so different, you and I, leftypol...

>>221143115
Never seen the movie

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alri

>>221143115
at home
got it rented from blockbuster

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Gonna cop this blankie

>>221143147
Very rapeable desu

>>221143159
where's sailing?

why has jimmy carr become a midwit quote monger all of a sudden

>>221143126
i meant it 9/11 style

>>221143159
>No sailing
Still a nublet.
Can't get into the 2350 worlds.

>>221143172
not sure

*chews on a carrot*

Ehhhhh... Whats up doc?

when was the last time you gave a girl a compliment

>>221143172
Age-related cognitive decline would be my guess
Or maybe it was the vaxx

Mousey and Poley never had a meeting. We were robbed of this

used corsodyl mouth wash last night and I still don't have full taste back, and food textures are off
It's like I've got chemical burns or something
shall be suing

odds i eat the same meals i always do today
evens i eat some shite for a treat

>>221143183
I didn't go to the cinema on 9/11, a plane hit a building, it was too distracting

>>221143213
ffs ok

>>221143073
*ties a stick of dynamite to an arrow and fires it at you*

>>221143204
grow up mate

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>>221143172
midlife crisis or took ayahuasca or some shit and turned 'spiritual'

Just ate chicken and rice.
Was meant to have an avocado but it was too hard. Idk why they even sell hard avocados.

>>221143198
I am literally chewing on a carrot right now. Its got hummus on it.
>>221143172
Some very serious reasons behind this but i dont have time to explain.

>>221143201
Said my nan's new haircut made her look younger.

>>221143172
been that for ages
his stuff during covid was peak cringe

leftymong seething theyve lost another comedian (he was always a rorke)

got a cricket in my room chirping so that's fucking excellent

>>221143239
The worst thing is how the fuck do you tell if its ripe or not until you open it? They should go yellow like bananas

>>221143204
ah yes the Frost/Nixon of the internet era

Rorke bumming a fag

>>221143233
He looks working class in this image. Sometimes forget he's bog Irish because of his accent.

Ruby Granger airing out her muff

>>221143244
relatives don't count, sorry I should have clarified x

>>221143269
squeeze it in the shop

>>221143172
He's doing the reverse Frankie Boyle and is trying so hard to be a rorke podcaster even though he was sprouting lefty talking points only a few years ago

Rorke’s Irish cousin Ruíraighin (pronounced exactly the same for some reason)

>>221143233
He's slowly morphing into Graham Linehan

Supporting Black (capital B always) business today and got a jerk chicken wrap but it's very spicy for me

deliveroo driver has a white name
we'll see what colour they are when they arrive

>>221143301
probably got rape allegations incoming like russell rebrand

>>221143301
A lot of his old material is rape jokes tbf

>>221143295
Oh well, I told a toilfu 18 months ago that I loved her and she laughed in my face and I quit on the spot.

you have an oral fixation

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Cheeky little wank to Xochitl to pass the lunch break.

>>221143310
Phoogh Rhoarhingh

Jimmy Carr is probably a paedophile desu. He’s always had an incredibly creepy and dark aura about him.

>>221143334
I too was dubious when my Amazon delivery driver had a white female name but then it genuinely turned out to be a white qt dropping off my package
we live in crazy times

>>221143301
>>221143255
he's not that rorkeish he sounds more like a weird san fransisco tech fag a la peter thiel
>same th-
right well it's not is it

Ruíraighin giving out about his Nigerian neighbours online and getting arrested by the guards

>>221143345
yeah just a heads up for future reference, probably shouldn't go straight for "I love you" with someone you arent even dating

>>221143301
being a leftypol is untenable tbqh
surprised more of them havent left the ranks

>>221143388
Amazon doesn’t show the names of their delivery drivers though?

it's giving /brit/

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https://x.com/Plentyshit/status/2050142553761059074
>No I'm his grandson

hes unlocked a new character, his OCD is really going into overdrive now. poor lad

>>221143398
then quickly editing his posts to replace "Nigerian" with "English" and being released and rewarded for his patriotism

redpill me on County Durham

mad how easy it was to be a comedian in the 2000s, just say

>put le heckin babies in a blender then hit the fetuses with a golf club xDDD

and everyone lost their shit and praised it for being "so dark"

>>221143427
it may have been DHL? Was a while ago, I even posted about it on here at the time aha

my face is red and swollen and my eyes are watering. boozeberg taking its toll

was pissed and had my hand on a girls tummy
hope she was ok with it

>>221143450
it's even easier now. you don't even need jokes you just do 'crowd work' where you're mean to random membes of the audience

remember mboko?

remember the cuckio meme?

good times lads

Currently on a walk and just enjoyed an extended view of a woman's wobbly bottom in gym shorts who was walking in front of me. She turned around and gave a nervous smile so I soon crossed the road and went on my way

landlordstein quaking in her boots now that she can't just boot me out for no reason

lost my virginity on reddit

>>221143450
no, kaelen, that didnt happen lil zoomie

ive started using the term jf at work and its caught on theres like 3 people using it

>>221143459
my face is always red yet I hardly drink, sick to bastard death of it

>>221143476
remember rorke's next jeans?
remember clogwog?
remember mihai?
remember london paki?
remember dualSIM paki?

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Just saw an acanthosoma haemorrhoidale on my incel walk.

>>221143388
My DPD driver is a white woman, she's lovely. Very motherly aura about her.

Rorke eating mayo out of the jar with a spoon

zoomers inventing the past again

dadberg has his own term for normies, he's says sps and jms which means skunk pussies and jism monkeys

>>221143494
not johnny foreigner anymore is it bloody abdul foreigner these days cant even say youre english can you

Presently pooing. Taking questions while it lasts.

>>221143201
last week

raping my own arse

>>221143494
you don't even have a job mate

>>221143520
sounds lovely, you can't beat a kind motherly white lady

tranners really did lose the culture war huh, not heard anything about trans rights for a few years now

>>221143583
they were given an inch and took a mile, made everyone sick of the sight of them. Only got themselves to blame

Love those poos where it all comes out in one big log

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Saw this dead fox, wonder how it died

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>>221143601

>>221143622
woke got him

>>221143601
mad they got 100k Canadians to do this in 3 years
>>221143622
noooooooooooo

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>Small boat migrant guilty of attempting knife attack on Israeli embassy
>Abdullah Albadri, 34, had only arrived in the UK in a small boat from France 16 days before the attempted attack on 28 April 2025.
>"I want to make a crime inside there. Why are you stopping me? Why are you stopping me from making crimes?", he asked the officers.
lol

leftypol climbing into a clinical waste bin for comfort

>>221143622
poor little bugger.

when a girl says she doesn't want to talk about something do they really mean it or should I gently push for more info

>>221143645
im still unsure why leftypol worships these people

This is the Info War

>>221143583
Are you Japanese or a tourist? If the latter how are you finding Japan?

>>221143665
up to you to guess and figure out

>>221143605
Even some of the LGB people I know are tired of them. I've got a lesbian mate who despises them, apparently they've absolutely ruined lezzer spaces because they're now full of trans women

>>221143652
i hate this nigga

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>>221143665

*strikes a pose*

>>221143645
i genuinely dont see how people can think we are all equal

Kind of mental that our immune systems are fighting a constant battle to basically prevent us from melting or exploding

>>221143665
Sometimes it means they don't, sometimes it means they do, they are very peculiar creatures

>>221143678
do you think a japanese person would type that sentence kek

it's good, paid £3000 for a hug a few days ago, have you been here?

women's fannies are slippery

>>221143645
>Albadri
och aye

>>221143665
sometimes it does sometimes it doesn't
you will guess and if you're wrong you will reap the consequences for not being telepathic

>>221143683
yep I've heard similar (work with a high amount of lezzers)
literally nobody likes them now, they've dragged the entire pride movement back years

>>221143742
>>221143724
I expected as much. Yeah I think I'll just leave it then, simply not worth the risk is it

>>221143645
Give crime me give make crime me make crime give me make crime give me you

poo

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*strikes a pose*

i want to.. how u say...
make the crime in there

>>221143774
You should try at least one time just to be safe.

>>221143782
s

Rasheed don't like it
Starve the third world
Starve the third world

*gestures towards an attractive girl's fannois*
want to make a crime inside there

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>paid £3000 for a hug

Sir Escort Mong OBE

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why on earth did he do it

>>221143775
lmao

>>221143583
nah load of bollocks itll just be the same as with gays. the genie isnt going back in the bottle because some influencers proclaimed some kind of 'ideological victory'

>>221143683
Got a lezzer sister and she despises trannards for the same reason. She goes on about how they are just autistc men who want to be like anime girls and they try to guilt trip lesbians into having sex with them by saying that women have penises too. She might be more blackpilled than me.

>>221143801
I dunno man shes already in a bit of a fragile state at the moment so I'd rather just leave it for now, maybe next time

>>221143388
fella was a nice white chap on a motorbike
even had a friendly chat with him

>>221143843
he was making a move
he had to get it on

Uh oh

no one:
nary a soul:
leftypol: rorke is finished
noel edmonds:
alan titsmarch:
del boy:
rorke: https://voca.ro/1iePs9fXtu9y

watching a video about that sub 2 hour marathon. got emotion ngl x

guys really feeling bad about touching this girls tummy now
dont want to text her now and make it even weirder tho

i ran a sub 2 hour marathon but nobody cared because i wasn't black

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Broken Britain

sacked twanny sacked twanny sacked twanny

>>221143873
>alan titsmarch:
friend of jodie?

when i was on holiday in the US with my cousin, we were out one night drunk as fuck. we decided to drive back to the hotel (we were in a rental car). we were driving back absolitely hammered when all of a sudden BAM!! we hit something and saw it go flailing about to the side of the road. we got out and had a look and it was this little black kid, probably about 6 years old. he was laying there fitting and foaming at the mouth. we panicked and took off and just left him there, lucky it was dark and no one was around. when we took the rental back 2 days later we told them we hit a deer. i always wonder if we killed that little black kid or not but luckily i'll never be charged for it

>>221143884
you're probably on a list rn lad. it's so over for you

I miss Escortmong desu, I hope Tilde brings him back soon he made a nice change from the usual cast of characters

>>221143853
You should say "Ok if you need to talk just now I'm here for you" or some shit like that.

>>221143899
fucks ake i blacvked out
dunnow hat else iw as doing

drug dealing just to get by

>>221143900
escortmong was boring from start to finish. mind numbing blog posts and psychotic ramblings.

https://streamable.com/xs7sjy
https://streamable.com/xs7sjy
https://streamable.com/xs7sjy
Need one for copealone now

>>221143884
just treasure the memory and wank to it occasionally
wanked to the memory of my first shag for about a year

>>221143884
whats the backstory diego

>>221143900
why? it was one of the most obnoxious, boring, and repetitive gimmicks we've had in ages

>>221143513
same, but I do drink. Heard its vascular rosacea. I've had it since I was a teen.

>>221143923
same as always
he didn't get his dick wet and looked like a creepy little neek

>>221143921
i'm wanking to it right now FFS
>>221143923
out pissed
get black out
girl has tummy out
put hand on her tummy

suck me fucking dick

>>221143911
I found it entertaining desu, a rare insight into the mind of a clueless degenerate

>>221143915
only politician to recognise Rorke's existence. say what you will about the man, he's on the right side of history there

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Diego in the news tomorrow

>>221143926
mate theres a schizophrenic on here that spams about poo and rorke thousands of times a month, at least escortmong wrote different stories

>>221143945
scream tahts true

poo rorke suck me winner

>>221143946
if she didn't scream or get her friends to throw you out you're probably in the clear

>>221143946
where? x
shacklewell arms was it?

>>221143962
Rorke’s origin story

>>221143965
variations of the same story over and over again
no creativity at all, that fella

There must be more to life than wanking and toil

>>221143982
...prefer not to say
>>221143980
nah but they can still be uncomfortable and icked out
not that i remember her doing that but i didnt' ask for consent either...

>>221143962
poor lad

if i saw Diego on a night out i would call the police

>>221143965
escortmong was genuinely psychotic and tried to force everyone to read about his gimmick
to the point where he found out most people filtered escort and he started typing "'scort" to evade filters

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hes got that shit on

saw a black kid drowning once, but i didn't help him (it would be racism if i did) so i just let him drown. he was bobbing there on the surface for a while before the wobbygongs started eating him

>>221144005
why bnrtoo...

>>221143991
sometimes poo too

>>221144018
Filtering is Reddit behaviour tbf to him

>>221144018
he's genuinely mentally unwell.

>>221144027
was in the gym on the treadmill and the black fella next to me turned up the speed on this and fell off
i didnt help him up and just kept running
you can never be too careful

>>221144036
you can filter for a reason though
if you see the same inane schizo shite every day you have a right to filter it

>>221143689
he's terrible but i enjoyed him making the arts scene seethe

Heard that strippers let you touch them if you don't look like a freak so I tried it and they let me.

Now he’s pretending to be diego again

>>221144059
????

I'm worse than people who spend the whole day on reels/tiktok

>>221144055
I knew a stripper but she was proper crazy, kind of felt bad for her.

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251 KB PNG

i'm diego

>>221144047
filthy nigger might have given you AIDS if you touched him

>>221144071
lmao same

+1 to diego's postcount

im a rorkestar
im a rorkestar

Just witnessed a nigger

woke up to niggas rorkeing like we rorke

Realising I've never complimented a woman

seen a lot of n words flying through /brit/ today

>>221144089
scream we are all the sam eon th blessed day

gimmicks you miss?
enjoyed that period where we were saying 'done him' or 'sent that freak flying' to every third post lol

>>221144111
trips of truth