eyeball paul edition
remember this
gm
Sleep has been okay this week all things considered
laughing so much at what the ai chatbot just said to mei'll share it later it's so funny i can't concentrate on attaching an image to this post right now
>>222678074https://vocaroo.com/18w9peks9RlZ
>>222678474of course
our alessia
no posts in 3 minutes?dead general.
bit of sunday online shopping for me
>>222678542none for me i need to save all my money for a house and retirement and the rapture
>>222678542get the tat ordered, the chinese shipping containers filled, more and more, forever
>>222678479Why did you miss your bedtime mate? What kind of naughty shit were you doing haha?
might replay bioshock infinite
>>222678555good lad>>222678562good lad
>>222678563had to watch the football
>>222678477hi juno
>>222678507What makes you come to Cork though? Is it a woman?
Finally FINALLY made the most of a heatwave for once.Spent most of it in the beer garden with my mates.
>1 (one) match, 8PM, South Africa vs Canadaa pithy offering
reckon if i was ever left alone with a horse i would caress his waltnot even sexual per se but would be interesting to feel a cock that was like the size of my arm
>>222678616we at /brit/ say good luck to canada
erm... sexhttps://i.4cdn.org/sp/1782611381095689.webm
>>222678600Which part of greece are you from
neighbour's slamming his doors againwould love to stick his head in the frame and cave it in
>>222678584And you weren’t doing anything a little bit slutty to pass the time haha lol?
worried catberg is going to die soon as he is quite elderly
Plan for today?Tape 2 half ping pong balls over my eyes, lie under a red light bulb and listen to static
>>222678641Meanwhile what you'll actually do is FUCK ALL because you're a coward and you'll always be a coward.
>>222678638Zante checking in
>>222678653Chain smoke and wait for wimbledon to start
Did that bloke from yesterday end up fussing with his mates cat?
>>222678638Thessaloniki
>>222678638lolWhy do you ask?
pigeon or perhaps seagull has done a big jobby on my window. Could clean it but if I wait long enough the rain will sort it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EV5yr0aUd-E
>>222678652get kittenberge to keep him company for his last days and give him lots of love
>>222678668What brand Iran bro?
>>222678695did this with my last cat but the new one was really aggressive and kept taking his food and the old one literally just isolated himself and didn't bother eating until he died
not even made any claims or got any points or done anything wrong
>>222678716screaming
>>222678711Iran?
>>222678716howling what are they like
>show me the most beautiful woman in the world and I'll show you a man who's tired of fucking herwords of wisdom i just came up with off the dome
the french and italian national anthems are bangers whoever wrote gstk should be ashamed it's such a dull uninspiring tuneit cant be that hard to write a good one either look at horst wessel lied, east germany's one and the soviet anthem all mega choons written not that long ago
lad here yesterday was talking about 'slap wanks' been pondering it since
>>222678744Brutal
>>222678722You're supposed to call and attempt to cancel. I pay £200 a year for car insurance down from £400 two years ago simply by telling them I found somewhere cheaper.
>>222678722well they need to be able to pay their bonuses
>>222678730not on at all is it
>>222678764american and british anthems were just recycles nursery rhymes and the lyrics don't even fit the rhythm just like rule britannia. >Britons never, never, never will be slavesthe word never repeated here is terrible
>>222678764>it cant be that hard to write a good oneGo on then, you're unemployed and have fuck all else to do
>>222678766fuck i was drunk but ive just remembered that post he said his neighbour could hear him moaning while wanking or something then dropped that bit of jargon in and blindsided all of us
>>222678654you think that but keep an eye on the news
>>222678722Same shit for me, house and car insurance gone up for literally no reason and now I have to waste half a day arguing with them
>>222678790sorry
>>222678812it's okay xx
Got pretty fucked up last night and gf keeps making references to a film we watched that I have literally no memory of so I'm just nodding along
get me off this godforsaken island
>>222678817
>>222678759Brilliant mate, any other beauties running around in your noggin?
>>222678848kino
When I was a super whacky so random teen at school I memorised the Canadian national anthem because I thought it was funny. Still got most of it up there. Did the same with the animaniancs theme tune. For me they're on a par.
there are many pathetic things about this country but our national anthem really infuriates. how pathetic how servile. our chance to set out what our country is and all we do is rim some inbred paedo in fancy dress and say nothing about the people of the united kingdom
Liberty is something we dont haveLioness is the name of women's footballMildmay is an AIDS hospitalSuffragettes were women who wanted the right to vote while pressuring and shaming men to die in trenchesWeaver refers to Jewish weaversWindrush refers to illegal immigrants from the Caribbean who came to britain after ww2So a cruel joke, women, aids, women, jews, blacks
>>222678822ktimalways start watching stuff on friday night then try to pick it up on saturday but forgot it all because i was absolutely rooted
wish pre christian anglo religion didnt get wiped out and it was still practised as a cultural thing like shinto in japan where they dont believe in spirits but still observe all the events and stufffrom what we know it was pretty wholesome and revolved feasts and offerings and sacred locations and offerings etc
why is foden not in the england team
wrangling an unruly poo
>>222678868No idea what this is about but I'd recommend not getting worked up about lefty attention grabbing nonsense. Zero chance they'll change the names of the tube lines to this bollocks
>>222678791rule brittania works as a football chant but most of it is dogshit
>>222678883gay and faggot
>>222678892they already have pal. this is the overground lines.
its my birthday againaged 34
>>222678894not a nice comment
>>222678883Locker room romance is strictly prohibited
all this chat about the English national anthem being shit is organic, in other entirely unrelated news Scotland are BOOTED out of the World Cup and the Scotch are seething
>>222678892
>>222678883he hasn't scored a single goal this year and apparently had 3 assists in totals
>>222678865if you had to choose an anthem representative of the current british public it would be that i love sausage rolls song
>>222678912he is cute
>>222678899>>222678928I refuse to believe it for if I do London is truly lost
>>222678936THE NINTENDO SHITCUBE
>>222678883>>222678934to add to this, he's spent the last few months complaining about working too hard and the mental elves, despite being worth like 45 million and have a nanny to raise his kids so he can go fishinghe's a lazy lil zoomer faggot
>>222678868>>222678928Windrush baton line xPraise Jah xx
>>222678936Had no idea that shit worked
the gherkin line
>>222678966permanent adjustments tek place x
>>222678948He's too busy pushing his son Ronnie's social media account despite him only being 7 years old Just really weird behaviour
merry's been sectioned
>>222678966literally everywhere in london you don't want to go to
Considering jerking my gherking
>>222678944
haven't showered since thursdaymy taint grease is potent af now also done some bum wanking when steaming so assume theres poo particles mixed with it
NEW LINE NAMES PROPOSAL:Woke lineGrooming lineTwo-tier lineTrans lineBiomass lineSmall boats line
zesty fode
>>222679023Would you care to explain your image?
>>222679003not very impressedthis one's better as far as the women doing funny faces genre goes
>>222679023should really look into stuff like this as my teeth are very yellowbeen like this since I was a child but I also drink too much coffee as an adult so I don't help myself.
>>222679047coffee doesn't stain teeth as much tea and many other foods, it's a myththe device is also a gimmick you might as well get your teeth whitened by a dentist once and for all for like £100
My very traditional mother caught me doing a 'zesty fode' dance and thinks im gay, help me reddit!
Wife wants to get one of them robot masks that blasts you with led light and it's supposed to help your skin or some bollocks that they've made up. Really don't want to have to sit next to a freaky cybermen every time I want to watch the TV so I keep hoping she'll forget about it but unfortunately instagram adverts are relentless and will continue to suggest it until the next stupid anti aging scam product comes out
>>222679047you could dilute some bleach and use that like mouthwash
we should do an instrumental anthem like spain. anything is better than god (not real) save the king (foreign inbred paedo)
>>222679061I dunno if once and done at the dentist would be enough for me lad I think you can only go up a few shades at a time and my teeth are very yellowalso £100 seems low but I haven't looked into it
Why don't we just sell lines to companies like we could have the Burger King line or the Bigham Ready Meals line and then use the money to deport illegals
>>222679068normtard relationships are grim
>>222679075Lemony fresh >Insert Taz image here
i am british culturer
how woke will gta vi be?
>>222679068why dont you leave her then
>>222679068Okay well tell your imaginary wife rather than complaining to us
>>222679068I know people who use those red light masks. They swear by them for sleep hygiene and mood mainly
>>222679020mass linehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZV3hvz4IXQ
>>222679095very
>>222679078Crest whitestrips. Everyone in America uses them. Here they are "illegal" because they contain too much hydrogen peroxide but you can buy them from Amazon.com (not .co.uk) and get them imported for £30. I used them once and my teeth were so white people started commenting on them despite them being yellow for american standards
Albion's pain disturbs the ancient spirits...They stir in their sleep...Protectors of these lands...Soon they will awaken...ROAR!!!!!!
>>222679096Because I love her and regular sex and company and cuddles are worth dealing with the generalised idiocy of women for
>>222679095who gives a toss
bro loves a cuddle
>>222679102
>>222679087I started this gimmick
>better than 2x world champions uruguayWE. ARE. MASSIVE
>>222679043https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YdsKrYBONno
>>222679131Ktim (so lonely)
So I heard England is playing against this Doctor Congo next... he must be pretty good if he's playing alone against the whole England team.
>>222679136>gingercompletely unnecessary for her. She needs like 30 mins of sun each morning even in Scotland
>>222679138It's a good gimmick lad
france is built on liberty, equality, brotherhood. what is britain built on? kotowing to multi millionaire paedos who hate you. in france they all hit the streets when they've been abused by the goverment. here about 25% disagree and do nothing and the other 75% will decide that its correct because the goverment said so and then spend their time defending the goverment
t levels droppingbelly plumpeningeyes shrinkingteeth rottingface wrinklingmuscles atrophyingskin whiteningi'm fucked
>>222679043that's a filter you're retarded
>>222679119how often do you shag her
>>222679170probably just as well it's an infrared light mask providing precisely 0 UVA or UVB rays then eh
>>222679197nothing gets past you cody
>>222679157It's a boss fight
>you are supporting japan in the world cup, right anon?
>>222661499kek
>>222679190most of these are a choice
sick of seeing that gemini advert with 'arry kane
>>222679157unc joke
>>222679212I'm supporting the Three Lions you bitch
>>222679207your mother's vagina gets past my dick
made a racist joke and gfberg was offended so i hit her with the >you're offended, i'm not. that's why i'm happier than you.works surprisingly well. thanks ricky.
>>222679212IM ENGLAND TILL I DIE *bellybounce*
made a racist joke and gfberg was offended so i hit her
>>222679232do better
tbf scotland had a hard group. still they deserve what they got for fellating themselves so much over the last 2 weeks
>>222679241good lad. you didn't hit her or anything did you? you don't coerce her with violence? it's just I know your type
Made a racist joke but nobody was around to hear it, did it offend anyone?
Ricky Gervais just tells it like it is and if you don't like it then you're a cunt
>>222679256kek
>>222679142nice quite a few BBC nations got through via this route
>>222679264only time i hit a woman in my life was at uni in a night club. punched in the stomach. felt bad and never done it again
When the Scots were litter picking in Boston lmfao
>>222679298Vgh... thv Tvrtvn Vvvv...
poo dildo
how are pack-a-day cig smokers affording that shit?
>>222679280>Ho-Lee Fuk the little Chinese fellaHow is that "telling it like it is"?
>>222679349selling their arse
>>222679355people like him and Camp David The Right Queer Gay actually do exist sooo
>>222679349it's like what £4k a year? Think most people would spend that on holidays, games, and other shit. Also most likely they are getting packs for £5 from the 'ki shop.
>>222679289???
football? nah mate. prefer e sports.
>English people go to Boston>Invent an entire country>Scottish people go to Boston>Get bundled out of the 2026 FIFA World Cup by "Haiti" and start litter picking
>>222678744Ah sorry, what country are you in? Sudan? What arr you doing there anyway, are you a mercenary or someone overseeing the genocide?
>>222678716Aw poor kitty
need to get off the booze
>>222679442been two weeks sober and feel great but also dying for a drink
>>222678851Do the animaniacs. I learned the canafian anthem because of watching hockey
>>222679374Right so you think if you offered a Chinese man a trilby hat or a lampshade to put on his head and walk around he would take the lampshade?
>>222679446dont get back on the muck
>>222678868>while pressuring and shaming men to die in trenchesAhhh, it was mainly women who opposed the draft for the first war.
>>222678905sensational work from the young man there
>>222679468yeah but i had to maximise outrage there didn't i
>>222679482lissa loo on the /brit/ 'log
porridgewogs try that shit in lincolnshire and st botolph will smite them
never understood karl pilkington's humour. pretending to be slow? yeah not my thing ta
>>222679479Gotcha, I feel you
Bill Oddie touched my bottom on the hovercraft to Ryde
>>222679511I pretend to be retarded at work so that I don't get given extra responsibilities. Many people think I'm an actual retard.
>>222679502right um
>>222679511Yeah you don't have to pretend LMAO DONE
>>222679521but that's how you actually become a retard
>>222679511Why are them Jamaican men swinging fish around their head? (DS)
>>222678905happy birthday
>>222678905Happy Birthday Nael. Is that short for Nathaniel?
>>222679541I sure am
Spicy Tomato Wheat Crunchies after Swimming, wrinkled, chlorinated hand dipping into tomato powder, sipping on Ribena while that clean smell fills my nostrils and everything is just wonderful.
got her shit pushed back
gooned 3 days in a row and my crotch is humming
>>222679575I can hear half life sound effects
>>222679575More like her hairline
>>222679567Then I walk past and cropdust you with the most hideous, wettest, eggiest fart you’ve ever smelt in your life that seems to linger for hours because of the humidity and is so thick you can almost taste it in the back of your throat
Sir Kier Starmer's favourite flavour of crisps.
>>222679609>cropdust FOY
I've got snails, croissants and baguettes in me palm. What's going on there? (FF)
Don't understand gooning. If I haven't shagged in a while, it will take me a few days before I can cum from shagging.
>>222679631This is called having a "death grip."
Gobby from Ruby Granger in Duke Humfrey's Library
>>222679612Right I’ve seen enough, cancel the leadership challenge send Burnham back to Manny we’re keeping Sir Queer x
have to laughmedia is slagging off the Scottish team and Steve Clarkeyet no praise for the tartan army who took over Boston and won their hearts
oooooohhh my penile is activating oh my god!!
i cant go swimming because im fat and more importantly i have self harm scars on my chest from when i was a retarded young man. i meant to get a tattoo about 5 years ago to cover them up but i never did
test
>>222679662hi
think i've got soul dysmorphia
>>222679674it real
everyone get out of my flat i need to poooooo
>>222679649Scotland’s Trophy Cabinet 2026:>Yanks Liked Us More Than The English Award>Beat a Failed State Run By Voodoo Gangs 1-0 Award>Didn’t Lose Every Game Award
>>222679683you forgot tight black trousers and short skirts ;)
Everything that matters in life?A sense of belonging, connection, mastery of a skill. Some enjoyment here and there.Yeah, I don't have that.
*slides on knees across turf*
>>222679701drank all their beer actually so that's a good thing
reckon Rubes reads these threads?
got sole dysmorphiawear size 6 creps but in my heart of hearts I know I'm a size 11
>>222679683Which years does this span? I went to school 1993-2005 and fits pretty well.
>>222679708>you forgot tight black trousers and short skirts ;)
>>222679696wazzaaaap with it fellow kids anyone seen any dank memes lately? you lot seen the 'here come dat boi' one
>>222679683the zillenial
>>222679729s
>>222679729oh yeah forgot the big lips and school boy lunch box
>>222679728I started school in 2005 and it applies to me.
sole has dysmorphia. thinks its a trout
>>222679718They’ve already forgotten about you lad. It’s over.
I just realised when I talk about the 90s it's the same as my parents talking about the 60s so zoomers today must think I am old as fuck "haha".
Rorke's scrumptious big bottom
>>222679638No it is not. Same myth as nofap.
right then that's all the homonyms for soul done
>>222679728I started school in 2004, gfberg started in 2008 but says she remembers all of that
so i cryi pray and i begggggLOVE ME LOVE MESAY THAT YOU LOVE MEFOOL ME FOOL MEGONE ON AND FOOL ME
back from the stag do
Reckon if the Scots promised the Pakistanis a Caliphate in Britain south of Hadrians Wall (VGH) if they helped them gain independence they could probably win a war against England.
the jimmy savile tweenies episode
>>222679772nah bro that aint it pussy feels loose when you've been gooning tight for 3 hours
sole decision
>>222679772Its not a myth, extremely wet vagina is obviously not going to feel as tight as dry hand, especially if vaginal tenting is occurring
*wins the game with an amazing goal*
back to bed for me x
>>222679797Pussy becomes looser the more the fuck continues.
>I started school in 2004, gfberg started in 2008UM
>>222679772oi >>222679683do you remember all that im in the north and im wondering was primary school in the south the same ignore this if youre that english bloke
>>222679813not Scotch then
>>222679823My gf was born when David Cameron was Prime Minister
>>222679813*throws coin at you*
>>222679829probably nothing
>>222679829well why'd they do that
glod
>>22267982326 and 22 is not "UM" worthy.
so this nibba abramovich made his fortune by buying oil from government then selling it back to the government at 130 times the price.
New legal routes from these countries announced the same day lads get them housed
anything good on the telly recently?
>>222679867widows bay
>>222679858Half your age + 7 is the maximum age gap differenceso yes, you're right
They may be going home but they left their mark,made new friends,had a good time and drank Boston dry,its about having a good time and that's what the tartan army did,..gone but not forgotten..
>>222679867Not since circa 2012.
>>222679858You might not be a nonce in the strict sense of the word but you are a predator just like those celebrities who turn 40 and start dating 30 year old women.
>>222679861he was based as fuck he won it all knew how to run a club not like these yank bastards
think ill play halo 2 on legendary difficulty
>>222679866he's french mate
>>222679888open the lobby turn on all the skulls im in
>>222679885Fuck up, what the fuck is predatorial about that?
feeling niggardly
>>222679867murderbot
>>222679885You have been mindrapeed by zoomette tiktok. For all of human history until 2 years ago dating anyone over 18 and as a 20 something was the norm.
>>222679867that chernobyl miniseries was really good from about 7 years ago
>>222679858It is lowk pretty creepy, not even joking. Especially if you’ve been together multiple years
are you really trying to tell me there's been NO good telly in years?
>>222679897>>222679904I was gonna keep the joke going but I feel bad playing around with retards.
>>222679897you'll notice the headline doesn't even claim it>>222679904did you really miss the sarcasm ther
>>222679897autistic cretin
thinking about that guy from murderbot again might because one of those insane obsessive posters about it
>>222679877thought it was minus 7?
>>222679921fargo was good
>>222679914>lowkStop larping as a gen alpha>>222679925Employing sarcasm to represent positions that are commonly expressed. Its not like the "age gap is paedophilic" people are in a minority anymore.
>>222679921its all just cooking and dancing and gameshows about lying and betraying each other now
>>222679957Nothing I said is Gen Alpha slang, pedo retard
i live in a black area and black people just do not understand that you're not supposed to pack your shit at the checkout and hold up the whole queue.
>>222679885>15 years his juniorthose aren't girls those are uncettes
>>222679968>pedoFOY FOY FOY
>>222679957that's not a commonly held position, everything about that post screams sarcasm
any footy on today?
>dating a girl who was in year 8 when you were in year 11 doing your GCSEs is okit’s giving pedo
>>222679982My brother started dating an 18 year old when he was 22 and had people messaging him calling him a nonce.
>>222679972depends if you've got a few items or your entire shoppingfew items it's fine just make it quick
uncs crashing out
>>222679972>checkoutFOY
the mongs actually though the cat lady larp about dating age gaps was real
zoomer men have created this meme about age gaps because the chad millennial was eating to their market share and sweeping up zoomer pussy
>>222679972https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/mum-claims-speed-aggressive-aldi-24755704>The loyal Aldi shopper says the worker refused to slow down his scanning - even as food fell from the allocated packing area onto the floor "like a slot machine.">But Nicola says she received a "blunt and aggressive" response, as the cashier accused her of not "packing quickly enough" and dubbed her a "liar" for her accusations.>Nicola said another Aldi worker then took over and diffused the tense exchange, while the cashier walked away.
>>222679992yeah round of 32 starts. finally something worth watching those group stages were brutal
couldnt care less about age gaps. if its legal, its moral. simple as
Gf is a scientist but can’t find the correlation between her being on her period and her being upset that I snore loudly
>>222680009NTA but they are called "self checkouts" in every British supermarket. We might refer to them as tills if someone is operating them, but no one is calling it a self till.
>>222680009it's called a checkoutalso FOY is going back into the filter
>>222679972Where are you supposed to pack it?Ever since I was kid (i'm 30 now) everyone's just packed it at the end of the till where the bagging area is
I always pack my shopping at the till in Aldi. They don’t even go that fast, unless you’re a pensioner you can easily pack it as soon as they hand it to you
>>222680000how is that relevant to 40 and 30
>>222680047
>>222680027this is horseshit thoughaldi have a strict company wide policy of packing bags quickly but NEVER saying anything to the customer if they don't pack it and move to the packing area>>222680042if you have a lot of items and not just one bags worth you need to pack in the packing area after the tills. german efficiency you see
went in the paki shop and they were playing that despacito song really loud
>>222680052concession accepted
>>222676682>>222676682
>>222680066
>>222680061never seen a packing area
for me it's milfs and i feel blessed because not only will there be more when i'm older but also nobody can call me a nonce
le
right well that's all my 4chan x settings deleted so now I have to reconfigure everything again
i use self scan and pack as i go. its frustrating having to wait for someone to take the tags off the vodka though
unexpected item in bagging area
unexpected item in the shagging area (it's me and my knob)
Doctor Mordred wants to replace humans with plants. A misanthrope, he lures Dr. Falicia Fairweather into Venus' trap. Represented by six incarnations, she wrestles with Mordred. Are they different versions of one another? We follow their battle via images of light, air, dance, horror, water, fire, tarot cards, masks and swords. Supervised by a Master of Ceremonies, each gender makes 'love'. Who will win? Can you wait till the end to find out?Starring: Jonathan Bowden, Lisa Garner, Nicola Henry, Jane Robinson, Katie Willow, Nicole Wiseman, and Claudia Minne Boyle.Directed by Andrea Lioy.Produced by Jonathan Bowden.Screenplay by Jonathan Bowden & Andrea Lioy.Based upon the short story by Jonathan Bowden.
somebody get a grip NOW
>>222680178
