>be me, at gynac to see if everything's ok before i start t >hear audible wincing once my pants are pulled down, wonder if it's because barcode thighs or if i'm genuinely deformed>glance at notes after physical checkup>"multiple keloidal scars on legs">ask if my vagina looks fine>"have you considered therapy">ask if my vagina looks fine>"it seems you're a special case and we're not qualified to greenlight hormones for you">ask if my vagina looks fine>"you should consider therapy">glance at notes again>it's all just speculations about my mental illnessthis is why i ended up diying
>>42130254Maybe therapy will make your vagina look fine
"My vagina is OK">You acquire Brouzouf
>>42130270lost
>>42130254>this is why i ended up diyingBecause... You were previously cutting yourself and the doctor noticed...? Weird shit just don't do that we aint kids bruh.
>>42130287>someone cuts themselves as a teenager>they should never be allowed to talk about any other thing regarding their healthstill didnt get to know if his vagina was okay
>go to cis gf family house>never misgendered >they don't even know im trans>spend five days there >family is based and racist>they never suspect a thing >we visit my dad and stay five days there>constantly misgenders me>deadnames me>leave dads go to moms>dad comes too >process continuestotal tally of misgender and deadname -> too high to count merry christmas
>>42128859Hopefully you and her (don't) get into an argument and she outs you to her family and when you reconcile and go to subsequent holiday dinners where they deadname you.
They were being nice, like normal people do.>cis gfYou will be the man in that relationship forever regardless,Enjoy fatherhood, Mr Crossdresser
>>42128838fr>>42128895that would suck but i don't see her doing that. if anything it would be like someone else in her family finds out and then tells everyone or sth >>42128933no, they had a long talk about how they accept their daughter as gay even if they don't get it. and ofc period talks. plus her dad is really homophobic and racist but was a perfect gentleman towards me>Enjoy fatherhoodlife involves sacrifices, i can't carry my children but she can, she has the pain of childbirth i get the pain of fatherhood for a hyper femme tranny. sucks dude
also tho when we do have children it's over anyway atp they'll know i'm actually a man then. no avoiding it. fuck my tranny life.
>>42129278just pretend it's with the help of a sperm donor or family friendbonus points if you use your pretrans pics
It would feel amazing to just turn her into my dream girl~
>>42130161>>42130178Pleasepleasepleaseplease......
>>42130178i'm curious, how large would you like your tranny gfs boobs to be?
>>42130193Picrel would be the goal. Even if she was super shy and nice, I'd have her act cold and distant
>>42130201You fucked it up with this one, I wanna stay shy and cute
>>42130201you know they wont look that nice on a moided tranny frame, right?
I wish my desire to be a woman were actually genuine and authentic, instead of superficial, sporadic and self imposed
>>42126681It's not even about looking hot for me. I just deeply despise myself, and this has become a scapegoat to blame my issues on
>>42126774I just wish it weren't just a scapegoat. It filled me with hope when I was still delusional enough to believe that it was the missing piece, but it very quickly became apparent how foolish I was
>>42126610>>42126774>>42126907I get what you mean. Would it really help if the feelings were authentic then? Why would you wish they were? It wouldn't get rid of your other problems, right? Do you just wish your other problems didn't harm you as much, and that gender dysphoria was something you could practically treat to make life easier? And it's disappointing that you might not be happier transitioning?
>>42129916>And it's disappointing that you might not be happier transitioning?To answer most of you questions, it's exactly this. I wish transitioning would be a way for me to become happier, but any amount of deeper introspection just reveals that I am cis and would come to hate the effects of hrt, no matter how much I currently desire them. There's also the wish that many of my issues were just a manifestation of gender dysphoria, and that treating it would improve my life, but that's unfortunately also not the case.
>>42126367trans community is so unforgiving that i don't question my motives to troon. fuck you all. if i troon out i'd do it for my personal peace of mind
How fucked am I?> Started HRT 10-11 months ago, 19yo> No women in my immediate family pass as women until you get to my mgrandmother, know nothing about my pline. Mgrandmother's a cousinfucker so the tree's a little screwy.> Look a lot better than I used to but maybe that's just because I'm doing the bare minimum instead of being a trooned out troll> Look almost like my hefab "dad" did in his high school yearbook (Susan "Raven" Renee Knight, class of '89, sister to Sharlene Knight) except my hair's a bit harder to maintain and I don't do makeup (perma boymoder)> Not flat-chested anymore> Some curves between chest and hips, thicker thighs (I'm retarded and can't measure)> Entirely DIY (40mg/mL EV, 0.2mL/5 days; 100mg spiro/day), too broke to be an ocdhon about my levelsAnons how fucked am I
>>42126623This feels like the thread was made to shit on this person. On the off chance you're not - lose weight. It's hard to tell what the jaw looks like with the blubber hiding the jaw line and your hair looks atrocious, start fixing it. Again, lose weight because it's hard to tell with the fat and start saving up for FFS asap once you've lost enough weight and have seen the effects of estrogen on yourself to see what's needed.
>>42128106>Because this is the only place that doesn't hugboxFair enough
>>42128128Yeah I agree my hair looks like shit. How do you recommend fixing it? My weight and skin is one of my main worries right now but idk much about hair.
>>42127639lurk moar
>>42128177not that anon but you gotta figure out what your hair type is to know how to address ityou can start by looking up hair type charts and cross referencing them (some are different than others) or by checking out some hair care communities on the internet. reddit is cringe but often a good resource for that sort of stuff.it looks like you have curly hair, so you should look into the Curly Girl method and check around the forums on r/curlyhair or other curly hair communities online. they are a huge help and the process will be long but helpful. it takes time for your hair to heal and repair while nurturing it with the right products.
>>42130235Girl how is this lgbt
>>42130235Only when waning
Ok, I finally did it, guys. After years and years of browsing this board, dressing in private, and longing for more feminine features, I finally took the plunge and started hrt. I’m a lateshit, but whatever. I’m only on day two, but I already can’t wait to take my next dose. What do you guys do in between doses to kill time? I can’t really go out and do anything cuz everything is closed today. How can I be helping my transition along as I wait for the results that come with time?
>>42127851congrats op>how 2 help transgirl skills - voice training, makeup, hairstyle, skincare etc, though you may want to pace yourself with some of these in case e.g. you go through your clown makeup phase when the rest is still too masc and it trauma's you away from makeup for too longclothes too, ofcI'd start with skincare probably, better hair care too while you grow it out, see when it won't hurt to start with voice training (voicepassing has a huge effect on overall passitude), and chart a healthy weight trajectory so you can start putting on fat in the right places as you reach appropriate hormone levels, while staying healthyspeaking of which, enough quality sleep, healthy food and less stress all help with getting better results
>>42123130Late 30s and I was mostly in communications/journalism, now moreso in education. Neither is a great fit desu. I've always had one foot in the arts, and if I was to John 40 or at least manmode, I'd probably shift my focus there.
>>42122663Have you tried reading my comment?I did take hrt. But I was in a special circumstance. I could afford it and was well informed. For most tgirls, this option did not exist realistically in 2008 in my country.>>42122649YES.Tbhon, I didn't bind that much. But I was lucky not to be expected wear suits and shit. Nobody cared that I had larger hoodies.Well, until I malefailed so hard that even my chud colleagues were like "we know, nona. Seriously, now!"But yes, manmoding was clearly better than repping in my case. It allowed me to function. Thought patterns finally aligning. No more disassociation. Orders of magnitude better.But this isn't the case for everybody. To me social transition wasn't that important (tho of course I enjoy it now). The neurological effects of E however cured me. Literally magic, lol.
>>42119072She should start by getting new glasses.
>>42125086well I never malefail as a manmoder
>>42128125I didn't malefail at all in the first 3 and a half years or so.The first few times I didn't even notice or brushed it off as "maybe I'm overthinking it" or "neah, that can't be".It's a long process. It's not a ONE moment.
malebrain and fembrain dont exist. There is only topbrain and bottombrain.>what if im a switchIf you perfer bottoming your bottom brained, same with topping>I like both equallythats a lie and you know it.
Oh yeah? Well then why do I like sci-fi movies and beer instead of chick flicks and fruity cocktails? Riddle me that r tard.
>>42127812stupid opinion
>>42127812smart opinion
>>42129675>sci-fi movies and beerNeither of those are malebrained
It's all masculine/feminine, ie yin/Yang. Masculine and feminine are the most appropriate words, but low iq people just think "male/female", so they have to use different terms so their smooth little brains can understand it without having a mental breakdown. I hate low iq people.
Why does my internet think I am a girl? They put womens music in my playlists and recommend womens topics like makeup and hauls for me despite me not watching that or even sharing my accounts.
>>42124321JadeyAnh
>>42124089>They put womens music in my playlists>womens music men are hilarious.
>>42124089Imagine if you were talking about work to a coworker who was moving her boobs like that. And she's doing it to see if you'll mention that her tits are moving. And if you mention it, she pretends she doesn't know what you're talking about. If you tell her to look at them, they stop moving, and they start moving when she turns back to you. Then she acts like you're being weird if you keep talking about it because she says they're not moving and you're just staring. Just general crazymaking. What would you do?
Can naturals move like that (maybe the ones with lower fat/other tissue ratio?), or is it only fake tiddy?>>42126135I'd tell her we should hit the gym together sometime, she's got good pec control.
>>42126066fpbp
i need to be shot in the head and killed
>>42130028By a ftm right? And before he does it you guys watch animation memes right?
>>42130063i heard that if you make animation memes you will get creepy obsessed mentally ill parasocial fans who will think and talk about you all of the time and then you will groom a child and ruin your career and your life and leave your prosperous future behind to work as a dead end waiter and your biggest fan will never get to be with you and they will cum to you and threaten you and idolize you and worship you and twist your image and there's nothing you can do about it because you're just a human and you will lose control of yourself
>>42130091>twistTwistedTwisteddoctor reference you’re a genius anon
you ruined everything
>>42130148Thank you for posting Sleepykinq's real face here every day. I'm glad it further destroys his digital footprint after the grooming he did to minors.
Do cisf chasers exist that would love an extremely broken tranny? In return I would love her more than anything else and do anything she wants. I would even top her if that's necessary.
>>42130157>I would even top her if that's necessaryPick-me
Christmas Edition II: The Reckoningprevious: >>41869583 >>42044782 (Fell off the catalog)Goal of the thread: Food and cooking is a core pillar of self care. It is self expression, sustenance, social interaction. Enjoy a homecooked meal from fresh ingredients, with others, if you can.Daily goals can be repeated. Remember to keep score, it can only go up!>What is this thread for?Getting better is hard, and sucks. A lot. It does not get easier doing it alone.Share resources and experiences with combating depression, anxiety, personal issues, achieving or maintaining a healthy weight, etc.>Why is this thread /lgbt/?Struggles with mental and physical health are an indisputable part of /lgbt/ life, be it from dysphoria, social pressure, heartbreak, or just unfortunate lifestyle choices.>Notes to consider:Please be civil. Shame is your greatest enemy in fighting urges of self abuse (be it sh, drugs, or just self deprecation). Relapsing into bad and unhealthy habits is to be expected, the goal is to increase the average amount of time it takes between relapses. Any improvement is a victory no matter how small. Your worth and right to get better are non-negotiable. And most importantly:WE ARE NOT THERAPISTS, WE DON'T REPLACE MEDICATION>Note on adviceComment too long. Click here to view the full text.
>>42038880>Thank you, a lot will be dealt with by the end of this week. I'll be okay!I see, that's good to hear and all the same I wish you well!>Just another year much like this one and potentially a perm position, What does the permanent position look like? Something you've been aiming for?>or else I fuck out of science and reorient myselfOkay I see, what are the options you are looking at right now?
>>42120035I know how to and are better cook then anyone else in my home just can't force myself to do anything for most of the day which means I often stay hungry for most of the day even with other person cooking half to more then half of the time>>42120111sure but only if it's about vegan cooking because it's one of the things I have little to no experience
>>42128081Is it perhaps because you live with other people that you don't want to do anything? It's stressful to never be alone.
>>42128204it's the same if I'm alone for a whole day, I can lie in bed for a whole day just rotting with few breaks for dog walks if they are left here
>>42128204sure is for me, I just ordered an instantpot in the hope of being able to restart cooking again (kitchen too disgusting and I don't want drama)
>eating 7-11 barbecue pizza for dinner on Christmas>sat alone in bedroom since 9 AM>living in shared rental housing owned by a useless piece of shit landlord, building is beginning to fall apart>didn’t talk to anyone all day except a couple roommates, not even online > parents alive but relationship with them is beyond salvaging> Dad is power-tripping subhuman rapist> both parents awful people in general> only in contact with them at all due to being too crippled to work and needing their money to survive> started selling old possessions online to make what money I can and get started on clearing out my room/tttt/, I’m gonna do it
>>42127992what part of “it’s basically all I can do at this point just staying fed and medicated” makes it sound like I’d be a decent volunteering candidate? as much as I would love to be that person, I’m living with chronic illnesses that cause a lot of pain and fatigue, limit my mobility, weaken my bones and decimate my immune system. plus I’m a traumatized unstable autist with cognitive issues. I’m out here Gregor Samsa-moding, I was not designed to survive. if I was well enough to volunteer I’d just get a job instead
>>42127068You wouldn't be missing out on anything this world is just gonna be a big brown ball of shit within 10 years anyways
>>42129431that’s part of it too. it’d be nice if there was an alternate universe where I could imagine a future worth looking forward to, but realistically everything is going to hell in a handbasket and I don’t envy those who will try to live through it
>>42129370For sure. I meant maybe in the future. You gotta take care of what's in front of you now.Also, I laffed at Gregor Samsa-moding. Sorry if that wasn't supposed to be funny.
>>42127068you need friends anon
Describe your ideal partner and try to guess other peoples letters through their ideal partner.
>>42116338HRT femboy/tranny bottom, cvnty passing but into niche interests and introverted, not overly concerned with material wealth, comfy.
>>42116338living man with cock, balls, anus, foreskin.
>>42116338mandatory:taller than me, 6'+topinto feminine gay bottomsnot a douche or right wing or crazy or stupidfirst worlder not baldingbonus:uncircumcisedat least a little muscular/buffshares interest in same stuff as me (comp sci, economics, philosophy, writing)a bit freaky in bedkind, gentle, affectionate (or into me acting that way)not brokeComment too long. Click here to view the full text.
>>42128740add to mandatory: no std's
>>42116338>sufficiently attractive girl>early 20s so we can get our kids on>I am magically younger and healthier too>she's loyal, kind, but knows how to not let others take advantage of her>healthy, has active outdoors hobbies that we share>good family>my family and friends magically get relocated nearby too>the country magically gets better nature and housing marketThis got a bit off-topic.
