Angel Devil EditionLast time on /bmg/>>35508677QOTT: Do you read manga? If so what is one you really enjoyed recently?
first ariana post
>>35538045I’ll start us off I guess since im about to go to bed because work in the morning.>QOTTI really love reading BL and gay manga recently i really liked Crossdressers of the Otaku Club and I literally just tonight read Smells Like Green Spirit which made me cry badly. I’m a huge Oshimi and tkmiz fan though and I adore their works. Also need to catch up on CSM again since I stopped at the break at Ch 99.
Going insane wondering if people can tell if I'm a tranny... I've had friends online say I pass or look great when they see what I look like and I malefail and get funny looks and people treat me differently but like some delusional part of me thinks I'm getting away with it and nobody is suspicious. I feel like people are probably gossiping about it behind my back. I don't really feel ready to out myself because I think I still look like a guy and I can still grow some beard stubble so it feels weird I guess but this paranoia kills me, I'd almost rather rip off the band-aid and have everyone know
>>35538101how DID she turn black?was she always black? >>35538045I do..on occassionLast one i read physically was Given Vol 7 i do love my BL, online tho idk theres a lot of tranmanga ive been rereading ie Senp Otokonoko, Bocchii, but a friends gotten me to start https://mangadex.org/title/5d64e486-611c-4018-a640-d0e08e7d8512/tomodachi-nano-ni-kiss-o-shitaim mainly reading western smut a la Twisted Love tho
>>35538045You don't look like that THOUGH
>>35538045I've wanted to do an angel devil cosplay for so long, my hair would be the right color if I went outside more, but I'm way too much of a twinkhon to look good so I probably won't buy it, maybe after I have FFS>QOTTI've been reading SSS Regression Hunter and that's been really nice, I was expecting trash manwha slop when I started it but I was pleasantly surprised. JJK has been INSANE leaks last night have me so excited for the rest of the fight, I'd keep sperging about jjk but Id feel bad so just EEE anyone reading should catch up if they're behind I finished punpun the other week and that was wonderful, I recently started The Summer Hikaru Disappeared but I've heard it falls off really hard, I'm liking it though
>>35538045>QOTT: Do you read manga?NoWell, see ya later
>>35538174excessive bronzer Senpai is an Otokonoko is getting an anime adaptation ^_^ excited for it >>35538157I think maybe you’re overthinking it. Do it when you feel comfortable. Otherwise it’s no different than being outed. >>35538208god i love akiangel, if i could find a bf like him(aki) id melt and die >>35538227;_; byeeeanyways that’s it for me today /bmg/, have a good night everyone
>>35538200fuck you yeah i do>>35538249true....worried ab normie reactikn but is ok. cause imo Otokonoko is 100% reppy trans but i swear some fucking redditors gonna be uwu its a femboy eay my ass cunt
>>35538282just don’t use reddit :3
>>35538045I recently read Angel Densetsu and I really loved it. I found most of the characters to be really enjoyable, and it’s fun to see how the artstyle changes (it was super rough in the beginning lmao.)>>35538136Crossdressers of the otaku club was really nice (even if it felt kind of agp ngl.) Ugaki was sooo tranny-coded lol
>>35538249My boyf is 6'8 and I'm 5'3, and since I have the like angel hair and the height stuff he jokes about us being akiangelcore sometimes, it makes me happy nini anon
>>35538325it feels agp bc it was a porn doujin originally lol. Rn there’s a translator backlog on it but Ugaki feels mega trans. >>35538328ahhhh im so jelly!! that’s so cute :3 night night !!
>>35538174she's italian so yeah
>>35538045>QOTTI've read some stuff in the past but not in the last few years, basically since I went to uni. Haven't watched any anime either.I wanna get back into it. Any good recs? I am cool with most genres except maybe sports, atleast if the sports are the main draw and not the characters.
>>35538045havent read a chinese cartoon in my life
>>35538208transgenders in shambles. need to have operations in turkey to look normal.
>>35538045>QOTTI actually got back up to speed on chainsaw man recently. Ive been really wanting to cosplay Angel for halloween so I have a reason to wear makeup outside of my house and I have red hair that should be getting around his length in that time. Im so excited... Otherwise I most recently read Ikemen Joshi to Josou Danshi. Really cute t4t-esque manga and total giwtwm fuel.
>>35538045Good morning bmg! Just woke up but I can tell today will be a good day!>QOTT: Do you read manga? If so what is one you really enjoyed recently?I do yeah. I really enjoyed Choujin X recently, I love Sui Ishidas art desu
>>35538208>JJK has been INSANE leaks last night have me so excited for the rest of the fight, I'd keep sperging about jjk but Id feel bad so just EEE anyone reading should catch up if they're behindJJK is so fucking good now after we've moved on from the repetitive format it's been stuck in for w few weeksI don't bother to follow the leaks tho so idk what happens next chapter Whose your favourite JJK character btw
>>35539775>Whose your favourite JJK character btwhmm, hard to say, ever since Shibuya got animated I think it's Sukuna, the bow during his fight with mahoraga is what did it for me, i love it when characters look like they're having fun, he's such a wonderful antagonist he fits right in with the story. I LOVED Kashimo, Yuta is also up there. Also its the normie tranny answer but I do REALLY like Kirara's design and her CT, Whos yr favs ?>JJK is so fucking good now after we've moved on from the repetitive format it's been stuck in for w few weeksI agree so much, these last few chapters have been soo insane, I can't wait until break week is over. The next chapter is super crazy no more spoilers though
good morning bmg!>>35538045>QOTTi often stay up until 3 am reading it (i have to get up at 7 am for school), and recently, ive enjoyed kagurabachi and the touhou mahjong manga!>>35535677>aw i’m sorry anonette, i hope you find a way to support yourself soon <3well, its not as if i have no money, i just dont want to be bleeding it, i might get a part time job after exams are over, since this is my last year before collegeside question, should i start using a name herei feel like itd be interesting if nothing else
>>35538045>qottI never really got into manga or anime, I thought it would make bullying worse, so I avoided it.though I did read many genderbender doujins. >_<>>35540236>side question, should i start using a name heresure ^-^maybe don't use your normal username, though>anything exciting over the weekend /bmg/?I'll see my dog on Sunday!!! ^w^
>>35538045ugh. good morning bmg. i should be asleep but obligations are keeping me up and it’s miserable, i’m absolutely gonna pass out soon. >QOTT: Do you read manga? If so what is one you really enjoyed recently?not typically, but i got really into suicide boy for a bit. it made me feel seen. haven’t touched it in a while though.>>35538328that sounds adorable!>>35540236i mean many of us use names just for fun, plus you can always just change your typing style and go anon mode when you feel like it.>>35540399> though I did read many genderbender doujinsdon’t feel too weird about that, i'm fairly certain that most of us in here did. at the very least i did, it was a form of self insert escapism. i didn’t know being trans was an option before, so i just read stuff like that and meekly hoped it would somehow happen to me
How do you boymode with long hair?
>>35540482just... put on guy clothes and tell ppl yr a guy? If you're male failing that's a good thing just stop boymoding lol
>>35540482>>35540524This. If anyone asks, just make up some bullshit about how you grew it out over quarantine and preferred it. That's what I do (even though I started growing mine out just after the quarantine :3)
>>35540482wear long hair anyways and:1. confuse people or2. male failvery simple desui say this as one who boymoded first 4yrs hrt, and im still like half-boymode cause i dress tomboyish yrs later out of comfort desu
>>35539719i completly forgot about this series and realize that this was another on the list of media that eventually made me a tranny
>>35540595forgot about qott, but i've been just been letting myself read some isekai slop like reborn alchemist and skeleton knight. at least it's enjoyable seeing these goofy lil guys do their thing, no matter how much of a stand-in some of the characters are
>>35539869Oh I agree, it's hard to not like Sukuna he's just cool af>Whos yr favs ?My absolute fav is definitely Yuta but right after him on second place is Geto, I just love his technique and character arc, third place is tied between Choso and MegumiOther than that I like most characters equally, Kashimo was really cool tho>I agree so much, these last few chapters have been soo insaneIkr?? It feels so fucking good to see Yuji pop off>The next chapter is super crazy no more spoilers thoughOh I believe that it's crazy, I've already seen a few panels on twitter but I didn't look too far into it
>>35540482Long hair on guys is not really that unusual.I've had women tell me I'd be more handsome if I cut it short but nobody has ever thought I'm a tranny based on hair alone.How can you boymode with huge honkin tits is the real question
>>35540236Is Kagurabachi actually good? I remember reading the first chapter right when the meme first started but I thought it was just gonna be the average edgy mc story
>>35540816>How can you boymode with huge honkin tits is the real questionSports bra and your clothes need to be baggy asfI'm somewhere around a D cup and I think I manage to hide them pretty well most of the time
>>35540830Yeah I'm like I think a 30B? I haven't measured in years honestly... so they're not actually big bc my ribs aren't that huge I guess. But if I wear something tight they're fairly visible
>>35539869Oh apparently some of the leaks were fake https://twitter.com/eagle97jjk/status/1783370708073988476?t=f2tykgdFe5BBpEEweNHjrw&s=19You should prolly read the chapter when it comes out
>>35540837Well the solution is to just not wear anything tight then
>>35538045Yeah I read Manga but I need to read more. I've only read berserk, oyasumi punpun, chainsaw man, fire punch, and spy x family.Right now I'm reading Gachiakuta
>>35540855Yeah I don't! My nipples still show with my baggy stuff so I slouch a bit to counteract that too.there was some thread about a boymoders cis friend telling them to wear a bra earlier and it was legitimately an experience I've had too it felt really jarring.
>>35540864Yeah I'm also gonna tell you to just wear a bra lolThat way you won't have to slouch
>>35540816>huge honkin titsI come from a family of breastlets
>>35540886I probably should but I'm afraid of a bra being more noticeable than boobs I guess lol. Plausible deniability and all.
>>35540896same. twin sister is approx A cup. i was doomed from the start desu>>35540886this is a good suggestion. even though mine are small, i cringe to think about how long i went without wearing a bra of any kind
>>35540908A sports bra won't be more noticable than poking nipples, if you don't wear tight clothes it won't show at all>>35540914>i cringe to think about how long i went without wearing a bra of any kindGod ikr, I only started regularly wearing a bra a few months ago and I'm wondering wtf I was thinking before that
>>35540935last time i swam in public in boymode was early hs gym class. had been on e for a few mo at leastWHAT WAS I THINKING????just the thought gives me nightmaresyou captured it well desu.a bra of any kind is better than> poking nipples
>>35540935I've survived 6 years without a bra but yeah I'm starting to get a little embarrassed especially in the officeI'd like to be able to wear clothing that isn't super thick without showing boobs or a bra though... No biggie anyways
>>35540968>last time i swam in public in boymode was early hs gym class. had been on e for a few mo at leastOh god that sounds like something that'd show up in my nightmares for years if I did that>WHAT WAS I THINKING????The obliviousness of baby trannies is truly incredible >a bra of any kind is better than>> poking nipplesLiterally, like I can't think of a situation where it'd be better to have poking nipples than a braA bra will always show less than poking nipples unless you wear one that's several sizes too big or smth
>>35540990You could try a white or a skin tone sports bra, those shouldn't show much at all
>>35540399decided on one lol, based on a character i like>>35540471yeah fair enough, i just think its neat being recognised by something other than anonette lmao>>35540482wear guy clothes i guess? idk my hair is short stm, last time it was cut was only start of summer last year>>35540623we stan mid slop>>35540817its enjoyable if nothing else, i literally read all available chapters in one sitting (31 iirc).just had dance during pe, lovely having to take the role of a boy during it lol
>>35540595I like that the artist made them look subtly feminine and masculine desu, I'm reading thru an anthology comic that a lot of the tranny 4chan banners pull from and so many of them are so disappointing just drawing a girl and calling it a boy. The only thing I didnt like about it was the lack of boyremoval, they still call eachother by their AGAB pronouns (which I mean is fine its not strictly a manga for trans ppl and GNC ppl exist) instead of eventually calling eachother based on how they present. Or even just a scene where they "mess up" how they address to them would have sufficed... oh well.
>>35540914>>35540935any recommendations on when to start wearing a bra? i’m still early enough for it not to matter but i feel like i'm getting there and should be prepared in advance.>>35541008i hated dance for this reason. like why couldn’t i be the one spinning?(also maybe i'm just tired but i can’t see your name)
>>35541050There's no bad time to start wearing a bra, if you have boobs and don't wear bras then you should start wearing one
fuck didnt get the name
>>35541050When u find that u can't comfortably run u probably needed a bra for a while by that point
>>35541050depends. a good indicator is when you start feeling self conscious about visible nipples through tops. more generally, though, i'd say it's time once you start feeling like you gotta slouch/where baggier stuff just to hide growth.>>35541078> no bad timevery true. basically, the earlier you prepare for wearing bras the better desu
>>35541050The earlier the betterAt some point it gets so bad that you have whole boobs poking through a baggy hoodie instead of just nipples I walked around like that for a few months before getting a bra...
>>35541078>>35541095>>35541101>>35541129dang, ok. thanks for the advice but i’m now acutely aware that i should have started a while ago. i’ve got well endowed genes so it shouldn’t hurt to start understanding the basics just in case it gets to that point. my only concern was wasting money on bras that won’t fit later but i guess that’s a future me problem. gonna pass out now, enjoy whatever time of day you’re reading this at!
>>35541184good luck. have a good sleep
>>35538045>qottI just read one I saw recommended on here about two trans middle schoolers coming to terms with their identities called Smells Like Green Spirit that was really good and short but also sad. I also really liked Liar Game and recommend it if you like gambling manga.
hello big men general, I am looking for one (1) big man to go please.
>>35541207take yourself
>>35541222I will take (You)rself :3
>>35541207>You're a big guyFor (You)
>>35541050no im just retarded and didnt put the name by accident lolalso yeah, spinning would be cool :(>>35541207stabs you
>>35541281well, since theres more guys than girls in the class, sometimes i do just so happen ti have to take the role of a girlim not evaluated then though
>>35541207Yes im big and powerful, even men fear me
>>35538045>QOTT: Do you read manga?yes>If so what is one you really enjoyed recentlyBlack Lagoon
>>35541008Elphelt!! Ouch PE was always a sore spot for me growing up x_x a lot of bad dysphoric memories from there and just overall bullying and harassment. >>35540399>>35540471when it really started to shatter for me i almost exclusively read gender bender, trap, BL, and other tranmanga like crazy. Repression would hurt so much but reading something would help. also hi watergirl hi shoelace >>35541205i read that one from the thread last night too. made me cry so hard at the end. so painful where one character gets a happy ending but the other can’t morning bmg called out from work today because im exhausted and don’t want to get up yet. might go back to sleep now ^_^
Why's the white sauce go so well with the lamb
>>35538045I think I might have mommy or daddy issues and idk how to feel about that
>>35541785welcome to the club >_<
>>35541785>>35541865real i have both lmao
>>35541865I don't wanna be a part of it :(>>35541871Idek which one I have, I'm very attracted to older women but my relationship with my mom was always goodOn the other hand my dad threatened to kill me once because I cursed at him but I'm not attracted to older men so idk
holy shit my need to have a boyfriend right now is so strong i don’t know if this bc i just ended a relationship or what but the fact that i don’t have a cute boy holding and cuddling me while i kiss his face and play with his hair is killing me because im so sick of laying in bed alone
>>35542036welcome to the world of tfw no bf :(
We don’t even call them flame wars anymore harassing each other on the internet is just normal now This has nothing to do with boymoding btw I just don’t have friends to share my thoughts with
>>35542172no, you’re cooking with that one. please share more when they come to you
>>35542172very true >>35542111;_;
>>35538045How the fuck do you figure out your cup size
>>355422278fl. oz>>35542036should i inject now or later
>>35542243Naoto come on
>>35542265sorryy
>>35541697I LOVE ELPHELTyeah, until now we didnt rly have dance classes, but since we started, since id realised by then and started getting dysphoria from it, its been painful. bullying and harrassment was generally outside of pe class though>>35541785based, i also have daddy issues. mommy issues if she keeps being an ass about me being trans lol, probably already too late>>35542036sorry to hear that naoto :(>>35542227mr google could work well enough>>35542243inject what o_o
>>35542278>mr google could work well enoughEvery calculator I try gives me a diffrent result ranging from 70C to 65F/G
>>35542278I think I have some weird combination of the twoOr maybe I developed mommy issues through a terrible relationship with my dad idk, as a kid and teenager I always associated my dad with negative emotions like anger sadness etc and I always saw my mom as a place of comfort kindaDon't wanna shit up bmg with my venting too much tho so I think I'll just stop
>>35542306i’ve heard pretty good stuff from the “abrathatfits” r*ddit
>>35542339Would I have to post my breasts there or smth? I'm not sure exactly how the subreddit would work
>>35542365no they have a calculator that a lot of people have praised, never looked into it myself but a community resource is likely better than a random website
>>35542392Oh I actually used their calculator and that's where I got the 65F/G
>>35540968did people like notice?>>35541050youre 2 months rn? i think i started around there cause running and shit was chafing but 3 months generallylike if youre wearing a hoodie and its like loking then its a problem>>35541184bralettes. the ck ones. measure yourup properlys and those will continue fitting until like b's.>>35541697morning nao. idk i think i had shattered before reading those? i just wanted to know i could find love as a tranny yk?>>35542243i loldugh ok yall im probably fucked. im helping out my dad and some peeps to idk build something? anyways. nobody knows, ill be having to mind or something and theres only 1 cabin. so im gonna have to do manual labour, spend a weekend outside when its hot, (18 deg c) and sleep in the same cabin as a bunch of dudes without anybody realising anything. Oh. and im sick rn
>>35542278>inject what o_omy estrogen?>until now we didnt rly have dance classes, but since we started, since id realised by then and started getting dysphoria from it, its been painfuluwaa... i had a lot of issues when we did swimming in pe. i have no idea who required that be something we do for 2 years in a row but having my male torso be exposed to my peers was horrific also i swear to god id always get hit by volley/basket balls whenever that was a sport they were doing. like every time. >>35542430>nobody knows, ill be having to mind or something and theres only 1 cabin. so im gonna have to do manual labour, spend a weekend outside when its hotganbare bea! >i just wanted to know i could find love as a tranny yk?;_;
>>35542392Wtf apparently I'm a 34C according to this... Big ribbed
had one of those dreams where you can’t quite tell if it was a dream or not.>>35541281i like the name MuMu>>35541697well, early weekend?>>35541900>>35542332yeah, seems like these two explain each other. you have bad memories associated with older men and good memories associated with older women.>>35542430> youre 2 months rn?ok. i definitely need to have started before now.>cabinouch, that’s sounds miserable. manual labour in the hot (almost) summer days is a recipe for guys getting shirtless, and of course that’s gonna draw suspicion, heck even wearing thicker layers will. wishing you all the best!>>35542489> i had a lot of issues when we did swimming in peswimming lessons always sucked. i’m forever grateful for my swimshirt, like it won’t do much for me now but it got me through endless trips to the beach> also i swear to god id always get hit by volley/basket balls whenever that was a sport they were doing.unironically i got hit by every ball multiple times to the point that i feel like it was targeted. i can never know for certain, but it really felt like i was the only one with this problem at my school
>>35542392Does this look right? I'm paranoid about wasting my money on an incorrectly sized bra
>>35542306>ranging from 70C to 65F/Goh damn, sounds rough>>35542430>ill be having to mind or something and theres only 1 cabinreminds me of when i had to take baths in a locker room with other men after judo practise, not very fun.>>35542489>my estrogen?idk, theres a lot fo stuff it could be ok, sorry for being retarded again. and yes, do inject it imo>uwaa... i had a lot of issues when we did swimming in pe.i had it when i was in like 3rd/4th grade, and i did do swimming for a while, from when i was 7 to when i was 11 iirc>but having my male torso be exposed to my peers was horrificluckily i was too young then for it to be something that bothered me a lot, but now whenever i go to the beach i dont swim.two weeks ago my class went on a field trip and it was PAINFUL when i had to remove my shirt because we went canoeing. at least the life vest covered my chest somewhat...>also i swear to god id always get hit by volley/basket balls whenever that was a sport they were doing. like every time.i dont know what that could be, sorrgythanks picrel for showing up right now
>>35542675>seems like these two explain each otherso like which issues do I have, mommy or daddy issues?I know you're not a psychologist or anything so sorry for bothering you with this>you have bad memories associated with older men and good memories associated with older women.Yeah that's exactly correct
>>35542694It is rough lolThe exact measurements I've been getting from diffrent calculators are >70C>65DD>65F/GLike what the fuck what do I believe
>>35542733If you're cute and confident enough just go to a shop and get measured? But seeing as this is bmg I don't suppose most people would do that (me incl but I don't wear bras so it's not rly a big deal)
>>35542753I'm technically a twinkhon and I malefail very often but I'm also very bdd and loathe being trans so I refuse to out myself as a tranny or present as a woman untill I 100% passSo tldr I can't do that without immadiately roping
>>35542711>i know you’re not a psychologist kek who knows am i right?anyway, daddy/mommy issues stem from the bad/absent parent. so you would only qualify for daddy issues. they actually don’t directly relate to if you find older figures attractive, and instead relate to personality traits. people with daddy issues tend to be clingy and desperate for approval, almost as if they want to earn the validation they didn’t receive from their fathers. now, most of this is anecdotal and not based in vigorous research, but bad parental figures will absolutely mess you up in some way, even if it’s not the “expected” way. or so i’ve been told…
>>35542694>and yes, do inject it imodone ^_^>i had it when i was in like 3rd/4th gradewe did it in 10th and 11th grade. i was basically post pubescent at 15, so i kinda just hid my torso with my arm the whole time. because if u wore a shirt you were going to be made fun of...>>35542675>unironically i got hit by every ball multiple times to the point that i feel like it was targeted. i can never know for certainright????i swear i had a magnet for this >>35542821>people with daddy issues tend to be clingy and desperate for approval, hahaahthe beach was always a problem for me so i just never went in the water. i had a swimshirt for the pool but like even then i felt uncomfortable wearing it. and now it would definitely do nothing
>>35542797Okay yeah respect that.It's really difficult to have a realistic body image whether that's a good image or realistically bad in the modern day.
do you think denying everything works? do you think if someone sorta confronts you directly or indirectly that playing dumb will make them doubt that you are actually trans?
>>35542821Thank you, I didn't realise that that's how it works lol. My friends have just been telling me that I must have mommy issues because I love older women and that got me curious if it's actually true. The mommy/daddy issues relating to personality traits and not who you're attracted to makes a lot of senseIdk if I'm clingy or desperate for approval but then again I never had a partner lolAlso is your name a reference to picrel
>>35542876Ikr? Sometimes I look in the mirror and see a normal good looking body and other times I look in the mirror and see an escaped gorillaI legit don't really know what I look like to people
>>35542916lmao yeah real I get mixed messages from everyone I meet irl too which makes everything twice as confusingfeels easier to just take the worst case and run with that
>>35542896gaslight them
>>35540811holy bazed yuta fan
>>35542896it absolutely won’t work but it would be extremely funny nonetheless.>>35542900in part yeah, but it mostly came from asking if drinking water was malebrained of me. >>35542916body dysphoria and body dysmorphia, name a more iconic duo
>>35542935Yeah assuming the worst case is just the safest
>>35542949I love him so fucking much it's unreal
>>35543010I hope u can break out of that mindset or at least not become a forever-boymoding salaryman like myself anon, everyone deserves to live comfortably :(
>>35543129I hope both of us can break that mindset :)
>>35542945I think I did>>35542996but this isnt a trans person so they might not have been confronting me because if they were, it was a little indirect. and i played it off perfectly. its like, if they they did suspect am trans, the way i played dumb would maybe make them second guess themselves, and if they dont suspect, it just seems like i didnt understand thier joke or something.
>>35543142Thanks anon, me too :)
>>35543186>i think i didgirlboss.but uh i would chalk it up to a weird interaction where you didn’t get the joke, instead of them assuming that you’re trans. i mean unless of course they’re like TDS types
>>35542675thanks, its based on a nickname given to muelseye. also its the name of a mobile emulator i use lmao>>35542733none and all of them, both at the same time, obviously!>>35542867>we did it in 10th and 11th grade.really sorry to hear about that, it really does sound like hell...>i was basically post pubescent at 15me too desu, sometimes i wish id gotten "groomed" into the "trans cult" so i wouldnt be miserable about my body now>ecause if u wore a shirt you were going to be made fun of...thats just plain fucked up, theres absolutely nothing wrong with weaing a shirt during pool class????>>35542896thats what i did with my mom a few weeks ago when she brought up the fact that i told her i was trans (i did so on new years eve of 2022/2023), which she probably only remembered because she found the girl clothes i was hiding in my room, which she didnt throw away, i simply chose a better place to hide them in, but i digress. i simply said "no" when she asked if i still had "the feelings of being born in the wrong body" (just writing that makes me squirm lol), and now shes yet to send me something like "youll always be my son" through whatsapp, so i guess that was a win? idk i feel like im going to have to show her my tits if i ever grow any for her to be convinced that im not just confused.sorry for the vent/rant, this, uh, really made me see her in a different light. sorry.>>35542916stop entering my head thats rude >:(
>>35543359>sometimes i wish id gotten "groomed" into the "trans cult"there was no trans cult when i was a kid. it was just >here’s your puberty that will ruin your body, mental health, self image, and face forever oh yeah btw you won’t even get a chance to fix it because you’re going to be done with puberty at 15. :) enjoy ! >thats just plain fucked up, theres absolutely nothing wrong with weaing a shirt during pool class????i was always an easy target for bullying so anything that could prevent that was worth the suffering. :(>youll always be my sonjesus. that’s awful :( pounding the nail in there. my mom will just text me “my boy <3” often and i just don’t know how to respond. im not out and idk if i ever will be but like it hurts like that
>>35541697>>35540471>>35541008Hi Mumu, Hi watergirl, Hi Naoto! ^w^>genderbendyeah, kinda the same thing, I knew I wanted to be a girl, but I didn't think it was possible for me, so I self inserted into these stories, and it helped me cope with reality a bit.>>35542489>swimming>rantI like swimming, I have swimming lessons, but I am starting to be a bit uncomfy. At least last semester, it was 50/50% gender split, so I only had to survive the showers, and then it was fine.This semester, it was 80/20% at the start, but the girls stopped coming, and now I'm uncomfortable both in showers and at the pool.ugh>>35542867>if u wore a shirt you were going to be made fun of...I got made fun of for being skinny, kept telling me I looked like I just came back from Auschwitz. XC>getting hit by ballsrelatable, I made for an easy target I guess...------------anything exciting over the weekend /bmg/? ^-^
>>35543288im going to just assume that because the alternative is too scary. but it was pretty weird. was this: >>35535472>>35543359no need to apologize. think your mom might be considering in her mind if you are trans or not. at least not sending a text like that might mean she would be accepting maybe
>>35543461>there was no trans cult when i was a kid. it was justyikes. wait, how old are you, if youre comfortable sharing that ofc. im curious (im only 18 and 5 months fyi)>i was always an easy target for bullying so anything that could prevent that was worth the suffering. :(yeah i feel you on this, for me i distanced myself from basically everyone, and now i have no friends, yipee :)real fun having nobody i can trust, now that it would be awesome>jesus. that’s awful :( pounding the nail in there.btw she started sending me these like, a month or two after i came out to her, during which time she started calling me boy or man more often, as well as pointing out manly characteristics i had, or ones i had in common with men in the house, basically completely unprompted. maybe she just wanted me to rep lmfao>my mom will just text me “my boy <3” often and i just don’t know how to respond.jesus that hurts like hell to me, who isnt even the one being targeted by it, i cant even imagine how it feels to you. sorry you have to go thorugh this, naoto>im not out and idk if i ever will be but like it hurts like thatmy views are very, uh, biased, but id say hold out until you can live by yourself comfortably, so that you can cut your family off. thats what im planning at least, though i do realise that its a bad strategy
>>35543499>weekend plansfinishing my thesis. going to need a lot of caffeine and motivation to do it lol>now I'm uncomfortable both in showers and at the pool.oh god im so sorry. that sounds awful :((>>35543557im 25, ill be 26 in two months ;_;>she started calling me boy or man more often, as well as pointing out manly characteristics i hadaaaaaaaaaaaa that’s just torture. my mom would point out my eyes and my shoulders all the time and like now i just don’t even know what my body or face looks like mentally because it’s so warped. like in the mirror it looks ok, then in pictures it looks like a picasso painting, then in reverse mirrored images i look like a man. its just the worst. and even worse with my body. and yeah i live by myself now, but im still supported slightly by my parents so i cant exactly break the umbilical cord just yet. i get too overwhelmed if i have roommates so im forced to live alone and deal with either the fear of being outed or sniffed out or cut off until i can make my threshold for not needing their help anymore which is 80k. >>35543535i remember. i still wouldn’t read too much into it. it’s a weird thing to do to someone unprompted but honestly i’d assume they just don’t think you didn’t get their “joke”holy shit i need a boyfriend like asap. i don’t know how much is post breakup depression and how much is just touch starvation but i seriously need a boy to cuddle with
>>35538045Gonna get drunk with a group of my rightoid friends tommorow
>>35538045mmmhh ya recently just chensoman and nana. i rly like the drawing styles!!
>>35543499hi shoelace!>yeah, kinda the same thing, I knew I wanted to be a girl, but I didn't think it was possible for me, so I self inserted into these stories, and it helped me cope with reality a bit.not me gaslighting myself it was just a fetish even though id had it since 2nd grade lol>anything exciting over the weekend /bmg/? ^-^staying home rotting away on the pc, more of the usual.>>35543535>no need to apologize. think your mom might be considering in her mind if you are trans or not. at least not sending a text like that might mean she would be accepting maybeconsidering how the conversation went, including my response, and what she said after, she thinks these two things:1. i couldnt relate on a personal level to anyone irl, and that made me look into this, which prompted my empathy, which she ALSO mentioned a bit over a year ago when i came out.2. this led me to falsely believe i was trans, and, despite being "accepting", in her words, she really doesnt want a tranny son. its fair enough considering i look ridiculous in womens clothing (ive tried it out, yes), but it just hurts.>im 25, ill be 26 in two months ;_;ah, that explains why it was so primitive back then. still i think youre doing great as you are now, way better than me at least!>aaaaaaaaaaaathat’s just torture. my mom would point out my eyes and my shoulders all the time and like now i just don’t even know what my body or face looks like mentally because it’s so warped. like in the mirror it looks ok, then in pictures it looks like a picasso painting, then in reverse mirrored images i look like a man. its just the worst. and even worse with my body.yeahhhhhh, though she, and other people, pointrd, and point out manly featured like my height, or my beard when im too fucking depressed to do it, because i look like shit either way, and it looks like ass like not even 2 days after shaving, so why even bother, if you get me. 1/2
>>35543714good tasteeee. i love nana
>>35543715like, its so bad for me that right after i shave, if i see the reflection of something resembling a woman i just remind myself of how much of a freak and waste i am.>and yeah i live by myself now, but im still supported slightly by my parents so i cant exactly break the umbilical cord just yet. i get too overwhelmed if i have roommates so im forced to live alone and deal with either the fear of being outed or sniffed out or cut off until i can make my threshold for not needing their help anymore which is 80k.you may not be doing perfect, sure, but youre doing really fucking good, especially considering your circumstances. as i said before, youre doing amazing!also, what does the "!!5sVcLnJZW2v" in your username mean?
>>35543714never read chainsaw man, and i assume nana means nana and the buried treasure?
same feel when i don't know if i'm posting on /bmg/ or /ggg/
>>35543742>>35543715the good thing is laser/electrolysis and hrt will slowly remove the beard. i had a full beard at 15, and after 6 mos hrt and 1 session laser it really is now just on my chin and lip and spots on my neck. so that’ll go away. but i get how hard it is not to care when you stil feel repulsed either way. i had a repper beard for years because i just gave up on shaving and felt so ugly even if i was able to go on dates with people and had people attracted to me i just couldn’t see it because i was a softboy with a beard and felt icky in my skin. looking back at those pictures though? i was pretty cute just deeply unhappy with my body and self. >that’s why it was so primitive yeahhh uh trans people were not something i knew about until i was maybe 14? and by that point i didn’t get what it even meant. no knowledge of GD or what being trans entailed. i weirdly knew what HRT was at 19 but not what gender dysphoria meant even if i basically was a textbook case of it. not sure how that happened but? but yeah the tranny industrial complex didn’t have any footing when i was a kid because trans people were jokes and something extremely shameful to be, when it wasn’t even really acceptable to be gay. it’s jarring how much things have changed in that regard but it’s good overall. and thanks i am doing well for myself even if i am a complete wreck and feel completely stunted at almost 26. therapy sessions traveling and hrt have helped tremendously in giving my life a direction that isn’t straight to the grave. which is nice. the random string of characters after the Naoto is a tripcode. basically a more secure way to namefag, some boards hate tripfags and i had an aversion to it for a long time because of this but here it just seeems easier in a general format
>>35543838desu this board has a lot of gg shit on it even like random threads just use guilty gear images as op images, makes sense given the western fanbase for GG and obviously bridget venom and testament
>>35543801It could be Nana like Ai Yazawa like the one shoujo manga/anime
>>35544202pretty sure that’s what anon is referring to
>>35544202>>35544216ya that one!
>>35543910yeah, ive heard that that usually happens to people, electro sounds like something i really want to do in the future>i had a full beard at 15, and after 6 mos hrt and 1 session laser it really is now just on my chin and lip and spots on my neck. so that’ll go away also hopefuel, needed that so bad ongyeah, the thing that motivates me to shave generally is how icky it feels on my skin, not exactly how i look with it.i sometimes get a repper beard for this same reason, family members irl complimenting it, saying i look good in it (thanks mom for having said so several times before), as well as saying that i should cut my hair, yeah.>i was pretty cute just deeply unhappy with my body and self.hopefully thats how itll be in the future, though id rather not have high hopes, since rn i just cant see how i look cute, from any angle.yeah when i was 14 i had no idea what trans people were, even though i was also kind of a textbook example lmaoif anything, i can be glad im aware im trans at 18, even though i will keep telling myself that its already too late for my transition to succeed. when im still pre hrt. yes im retarded.i dont even have a to the grave direction in life, im literally aimless at the moment, surely not great for my motiation to do anythingoh, so thats what they were lol>>35543983we stan elphelt in this house>>35544356i see, ill look into it, then!
>>35544404and jam
>>35543288I really like that drawing :3>>35543653>finishing my thesis. going to need a lot of caffeine and motivation to do it lol You can do it!!!! ^-^>>35543715>staying home rotting away on the pc, more of the usual. Sounds kinda nice, actually ^-^I haven't been able to focus much lately, not on school and not even on games :cTime kinda just slips through my hands like water.>>35543742>if i see the reflection of something resembling a woman i just remind myself of how much of a freak and waste i am. q_q>>35543910>yeahhh uh trans people were not something i knew about until i was maybe 14?Same, I wish we were taught this stuff at least a little in high school. My earliest memories of trans people are:>As a kid, my sister told me about her transgirl classmate, but I didn't know what she was talking about at the time.>A transwoman victim in the NCIS show>At the start of puberty, I searched for info about srs, but still didn't really know what trans people were xdI think I only really started learning about trans people when I started with femboy stuff.
>>35544216>>35544356I was like 6 when that was popular I don't rly know anything about it except it seems a bit dramatic.Give chihayafuru a read or watch
Not a big manga reader but I am a troon so I like tranime.Here's a pic of one of my kill la kill in-between frames
>>35544658ahhh satsuki best girl for sure. i love her eyebrows >>35544616it’s having a bit of a resurgence bc 2000s core. it’s a solid series and the characters are great>>35544584thanks!!! i hate thesis work so i can’t wait to be done at this point. for me i just thought trans people were crossdressers then later like the weird feminists on tumblr in 2014, like had GD been included as part of school i would have figured it out a lot sooner than 22 and even then i was still like super repressed at 22 just fantasizing about you know completely changing my life and appearance to be taht of a woman. oh well better to have been Naoto, 23 than Naoto, 50>>35544404 facial hair feels horrendous beyond honestly looking bad. i’ve had people say how much they liked my beard and i get so hurt by that because like i hated having it it was just something i kept because… well it’s complicated but partially because i hated shaving. but you’ll be fine 18 is stupidly young. like i don’t think 18 year old me would listen to 25 year old me but honestly at this point i don’t even know if im recognizable as the same person despite both being my lived experience. it’s so bizarre that way >>35544582wachoowwwwww
>>35544404>if anything, i can be glad im aware im trans at 18, even though i will keep telling myself that its already too late for my transition to succeed.I don't really have words of comfort for this. It's really subjective.It really depends on what you want from your transition.Why do you think it's too late?I'm 20 pre-hrt. If I was thinking like you, then I should probably start digging.. xc>>35544658that's so cool (* >ω<)
someone at work made a nothing joke about how I look like a girl and I was just gonna ignore it like normal but another coworker jumped in and said those jokes aren’t cool and I don’t know how to feel
guess who fell back asleep and had a dream about 4chan? (i really need to spend less time on here)>>35544404> im literally aimless at the momenti get how you feel. i’m just kinda taking life as it comes, even though i’m in uni i’m only really going cause it’s what everyone wanted me to do. i stoped making life plans a few years ago, thought i wouldn’t need them since i wasn’t gonna live that long anyway, and now i’ve just shot myself in the foot.>>35544584> I think I only really started learning about trans people when I started with femboy stuffi’m so conflicted on this. like i appreciate that i started taking better care of my skin and trying to get a feminine build, but i feel like i would have started sooner if it weren’t for taking the femboy cope. plus now the only “girl clothes” i have are cringe amazon cosplay stuff, like a maid dress.>>35545135maybe they’re one of those people that are passionate about gnc people not needing to be trans. also, did you ignore it out of awkwardness or did you not mind?
>>35545392lmao felt on the femboy cope n that. i did it for like 4 months but yk, all my skirts are from thati tried something from that era on the other day and mfw its too small
>>35545392>ignore it out of awkwardness or did you not mindawkwardness
>>35545392>>35545541i nb coped for 3 years… i was so stupid to not just go get hrt as soon as i could and that mostly just set me back. it’s so stupid because i literally asked to be my ex gfs girlfriend and i was still too scared to pull the trigger on the pills ;_;i guess it’s better than have bought femboy sjit tho since i mostly just bought women’s clothes to wear
I cut myself in desperation of wanting to feel better and now I want to do it again, I'm just a stereotypical tranny from chan without doing drugs now :<>QOTTI don't want to read anything right now but if someone knows a good story with boymoder character please let me know the name of it
>>35544584>Time kinda just slips through my hands like water.yeah, thats how it feels a lot of the time, even for me lol>q_qsorry>>35544817thanks for the reassurance, naoto. and again, sorry you had to go through that>>35544987>I don't really have words of comfort for this.its alright, simply talking about it helps somewhat>Why do you think it's too late?because i want to pass, and at this point, testosterone has given me a shit ton of body hair, made my shoulders W I D E and given me a chad jaw, my ribcage as well, and my hips arent going to grow much.>then I should probably start diggingsorrgy im just pessimistic>>35545135retards being retards, just try to ignore them>>35545392personally, i didnt take any femboy cope (i took something worse as said above lol)desu im shooting myself in the foot too, maybe in a different way from you, but it feels bad, since i dont have the will to pull myself out of this hole im stuck on>>35545598how does nb cope even work, genuine question>>35546043sadly, i dont know any stories with actual boymoders, if i did, id probs recommend them lolcutting is addictive, glad i didnt fall into the habit of doing it (and only did it with my nails)whats wrong with being a stereotypical tranny? own that role like the girlboss you arelife updateate dinner, it was god. pork with sweet sauce, would eat again
kmskmskmskmskmskms
>>35546492please dont, i will go up to heaven and get you back otherwise
>>35546043aww, i’m so sorry anonette. i understand how it feels, i used to have that habit as well. i hope you’re taking care of yourself in spite of this. drink plenty of water and get your nutrients in, your body needs to heal. and please make sure everything is clean! it’s good that you’ve been able to go without drugs, even if it’s hard i know it’s the right choice, proud of you <3it would be cool if there was a story with an explicit boymoder, but i don’t think the culture has been around long enough for that.
>>35546485Nbcoping is where i basically was having really bad dysphoria symptoms but id just tell myself i just wanted to be a feminine guy who could do whatever they wanted and i could live like that even though i couldn’t function normally and the site of my body and face made me physically ill. basically in order to avoid the thought of thinking of myself as a woman(or a man) while desperately wanting to be a woman. it’s self destructive and hurtful do not recommend. retarded way of thinking made me put off getting on hrt forever and then the anxiety of putting off getting on it made it hard to get the pills when i actually accepted being a woman internally. which wasted even more time…
tbhdesu i wish it was actually them teasing me for being trans and it is obvious now at 20 months hrt and getting embarrassing for me believing im actually hiding it well. but in reality it was probably just them teasing me because i looked embarrassed and nobody can actually tell im trans at all because i just look like a normal man, and will never be able pass and im not a real woman and its all over.
>>35546485>whats wrong with being a stereotypical tranny?Xenophobic country and I meant 4chan tranny so mentally ill boymoder doing self harm, drugs and neeting also high amounts of internalized transphobia>>35546492rel>>35546508I'm doing sh because I don't care about myself. I mostly did blood level scratches and trying to find out how much force should I use to make a deeper cut without having it scar later on. And I'll do weed maybe schrooms and lsd but I have to find place where I can get them also I hate paying in crypto but I don't know irl dealers who still sell stuff :<
>>35546561it really sounds like something that only brews regret...sorry for turning this to me again but i feel like this is what my mom either wants me to be, or thinks i am. which ig is the same thing in this situation, hm>>35546590i think this could just paranoia actually>>35546716i mean, not that im not stereotypical in some ways, specifically the internalised transphobia
>>35545135they said it's not cool because it's wrong to comment on colleague's appearance like that
>>35546766i mean honestly a big reason why i didn’t do so many things in my life is because i was scared of not conforming to what my parents expected of me and how getting on hrt was honestly one of the first, if not the first, decision i made for myself and only myself.living for others is a waste. i wish someone could have told me that years ago
>>35546857I like this interpretation the best because it means that possibly no one involved thinks I am secretly a tranny
>>35546908its also the most likely because i barely use 4chan any more and my life has been consumed by work
>>35546949>my life has been consumed by workthat sucks. busy season or just how the job is?
>>35546984boss off sick and his boss pushing me to deliver on project
>>35546994thank god they are paying you more for doing your boss's job, right?
>>35547009no im just letting stuff break
>>35547021hell yeah! what'd they ever do for you
>>35547047they helped me move across the world but otherwise they have been assholes
Having beard shadow makes life so difficult and painful, I feel like I'd be passing or at least malefailing sometimes if I had no shadow...I look at my reflection and something horrible stares back unless I'm in the right lighting to hide it, and then I think I almost look cute. Why does laser take so long?
>>35546871to be honest, i am afraid of confrontation with my family, despite how i may be making it sound.honestly, good on you for making a decision solely for yourself.
>>35547522felt, i always have beard shadow, i feel like id have a tuny bit more hope if i didnt have it...>Why does laser take so long?something about doing it too quickly can be bad for your skin or something, i imagine
>>35547522>Why does laser take so long?Be glad you can even do laser bakaI've done close to 50 hours of electro @ $80/hr and my beard isn't even half way gone
>>35547561i mean you came out already to them yeah? doesn’t seem they respected that but im too scared to even do something like that. im frankly just not sure how to feel when it comes to my parents , especially given the way they treated me compared to my sister so idk. >>35547522i cry everyday i see facial hair. or if i nick my face when i shave and then its visible its like a giant neon sign to the world that i am male. :(
>>35546766I mean yeah it's just funny that I'm becoming the stereotypical worst trans website tranny TM R.>>35547522You can always try using tweezers instead of shaving. Also makeup and using electric razor during the day may help you hide it better >>35547622Do laser first if you have a lot of hair to make it cheaper overall non. Electro is stronger but also much slower
>>35547686this is the same one you posted in chasergen claiming it was a chasergen server
>>35547686its not even been 5 minutes and invites are already paused
>>35547686spam
>>35547704>Do laser first if you have a lot of hair to make it cheaper overall non.I thought from the way my post was worded it was relatively obvious that I've tried laser and it doesn't work for meTrust me I'm not spending insane amounts of money and time on electro by choice
>>35547704>You can always try using tweezers instead of shavingI've heard this can damage or even scar skin in the worst of cases and I don't want to risk it
>>35547664>i mean you came out already to them yeah?mumu lore: my parents are divorced, i live with my mom, and shes the only person i came out to in the world. i REGRET IT, and she now thinks im just a cis manly man manculine man son, that im SURE of.i did it because i still had a babytrans mentality, and thought "well, im going to have to do this sooner or later, might as well get it over with". this is, no exageration, the single biggest regret i have in my entire life. if i could go back in time and prevent past me from doing it, which i only did because i had drunk a little bit and was super tired (i also did it through text lol), i would.>>35547704fair enough, i slowly am too, which is pretty funny lol>>35547686go away retard
>>35547807this elphelt is super kawaii, thanks
>>35547757oh sorry hope it will get better>>35547792its same as using epiler on your leg or arm
>>35546871you always give such good advice, thanks Naoto.>>35547704please try and consider quitting these habits, one at a time. it will make things that much better for you. regardless, you are your own person, and you’re worthy of respect!>>35547757>>35547792i’m sorry you’re stuck with beard shadow. i think makeup might just be the best solution until electro does its thing. iirc tweezing/waxing the face isn’t necessarily harmful, but yeah, it’s best to leave that to the professionals, no need to risk a permanent mess up.>>35547807Mumu lore dump! sucks that it didn’t go well, and worse that you weren’t in the best state of mind to make that decision. why can’t the people who are supposed to care about us actually do so? like genuinely, what makes them think “oh i know, i’ll just cause my kid mental distress, that’ll do it!” i just can’t comprehend thinking this way.
>>35547807i see. yeah that’s really hard then :( im glad my parents seemingly have thought im gay or effete for a really long time, still not going to be like im a girl to them though because that seems just non starter with how they are with me. >>35547990no problem!! im glad what i write can be beneficial ^_^
>>35547864i provide for the people (sometimes)>>35547990no idea. probably because they want us to be them but better, which my mom claims to not want, but idk, im not her, nor do i want to be.well, my dad will react much worse im sure, considering how he is.>>35548137yeah, your situation, while not good, but imo better than how my mom is about itanyways, im going to sleep now, have fun everyone!
>>35548435night Mumu, thanks for the basket and elephant pics, they are adorable!
>>35548435Nighto!
>>35547807>>35548435cute pics>>35547990I won't be doing so for now, I have no motivation to do it and rotting and pitying myself suits me better with how much of a failure my life is thanks to my actions. Being kidnapped for whatever reason would be a good end at this point realistically
i kinda want snacks, but im out of fruit and dont have anything in my apartment. hmmm
can I be a boymoder in my mid-30s uwu>>35542172>flame warstake me home, cuntry roads
>>35549598i mean i guess? you’re more than welcome to hangout here probably better than /mmg/bed time for me nighty /bmg/
bump
>>35550586Bump
>>35548435baséd bridget
Good morning bmg! What are your plans for the weekend?
when youre older than like 15 every birthday feels like a punch in the stomach.its not my birthday btw
the foul beast (me) rises from her grave (wakes up tired as hell)>>35553033thanks>>35553590merry birthmas>>35553337ive already said, but just to rot on the pc all day. which isnt all bad lol>>35549598you can lolalso, just got news that my grandfather died
>>35538045Pirated rimworld yesterday and it's so fucking fun I can't believe I didn't play tuis soonerI'm v bad at it tho
>>35553785well, it finally hit me. i actually cried for once. im going to miss him. a lot.
>>35554519im so sorry mumu.
>>35554274I was considering buying it on sale a day or two ago just for the convenience of downloading mods off the workshop but then saw the price of all the good DLC... ill stick to pirating it
>>35538045>QOTT: Do you read manga? If so what is one you really enjoyed recently?I used to read more..I read Chainsaw Man recently, like, a few months to a year before the anime came out. Part 1 was cool. I gonna start part 2 soonUmineko is good
>>35555569>Umineko is good God i love umineko. took me 200 hours to read but it was so worth it.
>>35550586>>35552998>>35553033thank you anons, we appreciate what you do for bmg throughout the night <3>>35553590every time i recognize a sign that i’m getting older i recoil in fear that my body is no longer capable of doing what it used to. while you might not, if someone does have a birthday today i hope it brings them peace and happiness.>>35553785>>35554519that must be so hard. it’s good to cry. it’s good to mourn, to let out everything you feel. please take all the time you need, take care of yourself for the next little bit, you deserve it.
>>35555606you’re so sweet watergirl!! >>35553590i don’t remember the last time i celebrated a birthday happily. beyond all the dissociation from my body and life, aging just gets mentally exhausting. good times go too fast bad times go too slow
>>35555692where did you get this picture of me?
>>35553590It's my bday though
>>35555867happy birthday charlotte
>>35555867happy birthday
morning bmg i come to you from the woods with my trusty tire iron. i am dying of heatwhat kinda foods yall gonna eat today?
>>35555867happy borfday :)>>35555898I’m gonna eat some spicy ramen for my cold
>>35555898matcha latte and egg burrito torturing myself to write this paper >dying of heat>wearing hoodiemany cases for the boymoders
>>35555898morning Bea! good to get an update from you, is that tire iron related to what you’re building? i had some fruit this morning, probably gonna grab some pasta for lunch
>>35555393no need to be sorry, ive been preparing for this since he went to the hospital... thanks for your concern, naoto>>35555606i cried a bit, now i just have an empty head. as in, i feel like my thinking capacity has considerably gone down, at least for today. guess thats a bad part of coping with everything by distancing me from myself. thank you for your kind words, watergirl>>35555410i have a friend who likes that game a lot lol>>35553590pop off bestie.most birthdays are spent like normal days for me nowadays, i dont feel like celebrating my getting older in this state>>35555867merry birthmas charlotte>>35555898still fully covered, a real boymoder soldier that we should all strive to be likeidl what im honna eat actually>>35555692sorry to hear you havent had a happy birthday in that long, naoto... if i could, id try to make your next one the best possible
>>35555740secret camera footage >>35555981thanks :’) i have no idea if the next birthday i have will be good, but i lose my health insurance if i don’t have my job start soon at my next one so it might not be a good one for me. i think ive hated birthdays since i was very young though. sometimes i honestly just wonder if i just have permanent depression because i really don’t even remember being happy as a child and as i get older i just find myself more and more unhappy and exhausted with life.sorry for depressing blogpost i feel like shit this morning. slept awful had terrible nightmares and now i have to start my day and i just don’t feel it
i want to mix up my hairstyle because putting all my waist length hair into a weird asymmetrical bun just looks dumb. leaving it all down requires styling with products and having really good quality hair texture. braids solve this, they are harder, but putting on a tie and then braiding just the ponytail is easy and more consistent. would you say this is still a boymoder approved style?
>>35556256A boymoder approved style is whatever just do what feels comfortable.Unless you're getting called a tranny when you go outside...
>>35556256you look like a girl 100% so it really doesn’t matter how fem you do your hair, sis
>>35556293im just staring at my phone on public transport when im outside so i dont really know what anyone thinks>>35556311preciate the hugbox
>>35556256braided ponytail sounds cute.
>>35556426braids are pretty much the only thing my hair is suited to because the last time i got a cut i didnt ask for layers
>>35556554when did you last get it cut? i still think braids are cute though. im sure it would look good on you
>>35556590some time last summer
Getting a haircut soon any1 have some cute hairstyle inspo? Haven't gotten a haircut in 3 years minimum so i know nothing. X_X
>>35556794bang bang wolf cut bang bang ask for layers and a shag bang, itll be super cute if the stylist knows what theyre doing.>>35556605i see. well i think the braids would look nice, you have straightish hair right? next time when you go get it cut def ask for layers so it falls super nicely.
>>35556836>knows what theyre doinggod im out of it. it needs to have a proper shape and you need to get the right stylist depending on your hair type, but if youre getting it cut yuo should do this anyway
>>35556851nta but I don't this kind of cut would suit my head shape at all
>>35555981oh yeah forgot to say but this might be the final catalyst for me to stop caring about my income and start hrt, which is kinda funny>>35556144its alright, feel free todo it, as long as it helps you even a little bit>>35556256id say it is desu>>35556794as anoto said, wolf cut might be a good idea, idk my hair is still well at guy length lolalso my aunt has been saying shes going to make me into a man, what could she mean by this
>>35556878fair. i usually just tell my stylist of a vague idea i like and let him figure it out since hes the expert. id recommend that
>>35556996do you have any recommendations for finding an lgbt friendly stylist?
>>35556836ty :D
>>35557022ehh, not really? i live in a major city with a huge lgbt population so pretty much every stylist here has to be lgbt friendly or theyll lose business. id say look for alternative/bohemian hair salons in a big city or in a student area. i dont know where you are located so, i cant exactly help 100%.
>>35557036np np! hope it helps!also i completely forgot since i dont really avatarfag but its actually naotos birthday today which is fun. >>35557067 >>35556991>my aunt has been saying shes going to make me into a manuhhhh
>>35556794good for you! getting rid of dead ends in important in good hair care!>>35556836i love wolf cuts so much, wish they worked for me at all>>35556991great, perhaps something good can come from something sadalso stay away from your aunt that’s not a red flag that’s a big red flashing light with a blaring alarm system.
>>35557102>>35557144my aunt has no idea im trans lolshes also a lesbian which is kinda cool i think, and yes she does have a partner>great, perhaps something good can come from something sadmaybe its the fact that it hurts that he only ever got to see guy me, and the fact that it came to mind again the fact that i really dont to have a funeral as a guy, idk
> good for you! getting rid of dead ends in important in good hair care!Yeah its pretty bad at this point I'm pretty behind on self care I got the neet look.I've been a bit apprehensive about bangs since I've been told "it wouldn't fit your face shape" and it lives rent free in my head. Hope a haircut gives me confidence so i take more selfies and dress up more.dysphoria is pretty crippling recently so havent been able to take photos.
woops forgot to reply properly :P
>>35557429why are you wearing a collar and a bell
>>35557429mmm from what i see, it doesnt look like bangs wouldnt fit your face shape. it would probably fill out a bit more of your forehead, since those hairs look a bit thin and wispy. id ask your stylist though what they think because honestly bangs are pretty universal for most people
>>35557207I FORGOT TO USE THE NAME FUCK>>35557429nice collar lol
>>35557207>auntstill a weird thing to say, but i guess it’s possible she just didn’t think of how it could sound and wanted to take you axe throwing or something.>funeralyeah. we’ve gone so long in life not being seen as who we are, it’d suck to have to go through that in death too.>>35557429you’d look really nice with a touch up. pretty much everything i would say was already said by Naoto and she is by far more stylish than me, so take the advice from the expert. also nice nails, i need to take better care of mine.
>>35555410It's so absurdly expensive buying it is not worth it
i got a free matcha today! i was at 10 punches on my card, then some random guy came up to me and see he loved my outfit. :3
>>35557207ok so i had a long talk with my aunt about stuff unrelated to gender or that shit and realised that by "making me a man" she means making sure im a responsible adult. i hadnt talked with her a while lot before this so i couldnt be sure, but hearing stuff from her has made me realise that at least for a while shes someone i can count on, even if that may go away if i ever have to present female.>>35557824this exactly. she doesnt mean something like axe throwing, she means stuff like managing finances and shit, which can and will be useful later on>>35558422oh, thats very nice :)glad your day got better naoto
>>35558757ok that's good that its not some crazy scary like forcemasc thing where she can sniff out the tranner on you. being an adult isnt really something u can be taught though, you kind of just learn it as you go along and grow up. and if youre 18, youre barely even close to it. i mean im nearly 26 and i dont even really full much like an adult loli feel i look young and people treat me as a young kid because of that but also i feel stunted socially and overall because like i cant really do things for myself. like my dad does so much shit for me that i dont really know how to do like put in an aircon lol. anyway, yeah uh dont worry much about that then. and yes im very happy. i got a matcha and a burrito breakfast thing but i wish i got the veggie burrito because the one i got was too greasy. had beef and potato in it. i shouldve known itd be sloppy.
>>35554519>deathI'm sorry. It sucks so much to lose people who you love and who love you.I lost my aunt last year to cancer, and I still cry about missing her.She was probably the only person in my life who genuinely believed in me and supported me.The fact they're gone won't stop hurting, but it'll be easier to accept in time.Take care and make sure you have time to grieve.<3>>35547664>i cry everyday i see facial hair. or if i nick my face when i shave and then its visible its like a giant neon sign to the world that i am male. :(Same q_qI keep cutting myself and giving myself razor burns because I keep trying to do close shaves..Nobody irl cares, but it gives me so much anxiety, and it's so UNCOMFORTABLE!!I'm letting it grow today because I'm not going anywhere, and it'll be easier to shave tomorrow :c>>35554274I love this game ^-^I finished it only once despite having almost 1k hours on it xc (most hours are afked, because I'd leave it turned on so I wouldn't have to wait for the game to load)imo, it's best to buy the base game and crack the dlcs, so you have access to the steam workshop.have fun!! ^w^------------->hairstyleI think my biggest pain is the fact that I love pixie cuts, but I doubt I'll ever be able to make them look good with my face...>rant, don't read unless you want toI've been looking at pics of me for the past 30 minutesIt would be so much easier to be a boy. Why is my brain like thisughwait, no, it wouldn't be easier, I legit have no idea how boys work, lmaoI wish I was normal. I'm pretty sure my mum is not gonna accept me.She's an artist, so she's generally accepting of queer and trans people, but she also has very weird opinions, like anti-vax, pro-russia, magic medical substance.I'm kinda hoping that because my sister already has kids that she won't be sad about me, not having any.I wonder if I was really born this way or if I just brought this on myself somehow.sorry for ranting
>>35558422free matcha! also i’m not surprised that some guy complimented your outfit, out of everyone i’ve talked to, irl or online, you seem to know the most about fashion.>>35558757whew. ok. that’s a terrible way to phrase that, but learning how to do taxes and stuff is a really good life skill. >>35558925>rantit’s tough cause we may never fully know. like it seems partially genetic, but social factors absolutely play a part in it. regardless, it’s how we are now, and i’m sure we all know we can’t change it. your mum sounds like a mixed bag, i hope you can find an answer without outing yourself. maybe try bringing it up if there is trans related news?
>>35557674tysm you've been super helpful naoto>>35557824ty :)>>35557744>>35557549A friend got it for me and i thought it was cute @_@
>>35559092>out of everyone i’ve talked to, irl or online, you seem to know the most about fashioni like to think so >////< but i dress kinda meh i feel like im never satisfied with how i look bc bdd and gdbut i wasnt wearing anything super fancy. just my pinstriped trousers, some pink socks with apple blossoms on it, loafers, my whtie blouse, my scarf, and my burberry coat. i wasnt even wearing jewelry since i was just going to get lunch :o >>35558925>I keep cutting myself and giving myself razor burns because I keep trying to do close shaves..Nobody irl cares, but it gives me so much anxiety, and it's so UNCOMFORTABLE!!god i get this so much. even the letting it grow so its easier to get a closer shave. itll start to vanish when you get on hrt and with some laser be sure. so have some hopefuel! >She's an artist, so she's generally accepting of queer and trans people, but she also has very weird opinions, like anti-vax, pro-russia, magic medical substance.hmmm yeah thats a tough read>I wonder if I was really born this way or if I just brought this on myself somehow.i wonder this a lot too like was i influenced by society to hate myself, but i think i just was born like this with a combination of all the other stuff worsening it? who can be sure >>35559205np np! good luck at the salon
How can I voice train if I hate listening to myself? And how hard it is to maintain wolf cut hairstyle with long straight hair?
>>35558850yeah, im aware that a huge part of it has to be through experience, but her teaching me stuff is extremely nice, since having at least an idea of what i could do sounds useful loli probably phrased it wrong, and she didnt tell me this outright, but i came to the conclusion from the conversation we had togethernow you know to ask for the vegetarian one, so i guess it wasnt all bad? idk>>35558925again, thanks for the kind words, shoelace, they really do mean a whole lot to me.im sorry to hear about your aunt, but im sure that shes proud of you.<3also dw about ranting, i think its kinda cute when people just rant about stuff>>35559205your friend has good taste, east
>>35559386u just gotta style every time u wash
>>35558925I really like it too! I managed to get a fairly stable colony going and we're pretty slowly advancing, about to make chemfuel refineries and generators
>>35559386wolf cuts are really easy to maintain. thats why theyre super in right now. theyre supposed to be kind of wild looking, hence the wolf name. just make sure you get it shaped right and layersVT stuff i cant help you there. i think everyone hates hearing their voice, its just how it goes. i have a dainty girly voice but can code switch a bunch if i need to have a masc voice. idk how i do this though. i just have a fagcent though which i want gone. >>35559404its still good to have someone teach you stuff. and yeah i love the veggie wrap its just i saw they added this to their menu and was curious lol>>35559322forgot to mention this but my leg is sore from injecting yesterday. kind of weird because i didnt bleed or really have any issues yesterday but now i feel it in my right thigh muscle
>>35559425>>35559431Ok thanks I will look at how to maintain it later than because it still looks hard to do without knowing what to do *-* Still I will probably just cut my ends because it would be very gay for a "guy" to have that hairstyle and my face doesn't want to kiss a brick from a stranger before first date tee hee
>>35559527my routine is deep wash, condition, then towel dry into an airdry while it sets, then when its still damp use a curl cream on the bangs and sides and back, then fix it all day as the wind messes it up like crazy. but you likely wouldnt even need curl cream if your hair is str8. also its not really gay looking, but it definitely can be a little clocky? since its more popular with women
Aren't wolf cuts supposed to be a pain to maintain?
>>35559657nope its super low maintenance. i have more maintenance than usual since i have 2c hair.
>>35559657Yeah that's what I always thought too>>35559691How difficult would it be with kinda wavy kinda curly hair
>>35559736thats what 2c is. see >>35559602
sorry if my responses are lackluster, ive been away from the pc for the entire day, i swear ill answer better when i get on the pc again!
>>35559746I think I'm closer to 2A or 2B
>>35559800youll be fine with that routine then. id recommend it with a shag bang though. dont get curtains like i did for a year
>>35559820this is mostly because curtains do not sit right and expose too much of your forehead so if youre uncomfortable with your brow showing, get bangs. its a tranny thing for a reason.
>>35559820>>35559843What's a shag bang tho? I know what curtain bangs are
>>35559930its where instead of pushing the bangs to make a curtain shape, you get a shag style layered bang. it works really well for wavy hair so long as u use curl cream on it. it comes from a shag but wolf cuts are kind of a weird frankenstein of a shag and a mullet anyways. so it fits the look nicely.
>>35559958Oke that looks very nice thank you naoto
>>35560089np np
>>35559602I brush my hair if I haven't been moving out of bed for a while then shampoo the roots, conditioner ends after, towel semi dry into brushing and using cold/warm hairdryer so I would just have to stop brushing them after the shower. Also I didn't knew that hair curling up at the ends is normal, I always thought it's because I'm not taking enough care of them but everyone else must be just ironing them... or I'm stupip Oh and is it hard to to do it yourself? I don't trust much hairdressers around meI live in a mid/east europe so I my get bitten by some crypto gay nationalist during the night in my town :<
>>35560250i do not cut my own hair. i wouldnt recommend it, youre going to mess it up if you do it. if youre in central europe do a day trip to Krakow, Berlin, Hamburg, Vienna, or Warsaw. i'm sure theres somewhere in all those cities who can cut your hair properly. yes hair normally curls at the ends, male hairstyles tend to not curl because theyre short, even on curly / wavy haired men. but when it grows out it flows like a waterfall almost. mine spirals into a helix if i dont take good care of it for a day.
>>35560362Man hair maintenance is so complex maybe I'm just better off being a hon so I don't need to think about this stuff lol
>>35559092>maybe try bringing it up if there is trans related news?I did it once a while ago, and I told her about the ban on transwomen in chess.She just kinda scoffed and said that there are important problems people should focus on instead of this.Which didn't really tell me much about her opinion, but at least it wasn't aggressively negative.I'll try talking to her about trans related stuff some more.>>35560362>Krakow, Berlin, Hamburg, Vienna, or Warsawyou named every big city in central europe except for Prague :C>>35559322>itll start to vanish when you get on hrt and with some laser be sure. so have some hopefuel! thanks <3>>35559404>also dw about ranting, i think its kinda cute when people just rant about stuffthank you, I don't really have anyone to vent or talk to except you girls on /bmg/.It's also really nice to hear what people further down the timeline have to say.I have two transfem friends irl, but one kinda stopped talking to me. I'm pretty sure she just forgot about me because she's too busy with her polycule drama.My other transfem friend adjusted her sleep schedule to her foreign friends, so she sleeps during the day, and the response time is long, which makes it hard to chat.I also have a transmasc friend and a bunch of queer friends, but I'm not out to them. Seems like a really dumb thing to do, for now at least.
I think everyone that has given me advice is wrong, and think the person can tell im trans somehow and sorta indirectly confronted me. But I will act like they dont know because I also dont know for sure.
>>35560870>you named every big city in central europe except for Prague :Cahhhh sorry, are you Czech? I'm not really like an expert on what cities are good for trans/style stuff in Europe honestly. I've only been to a few mainland European cities in the first place, and only two are in central europe; Zurich and Munich. I'd assume Prague has places too, I just know absolutely nothing about Czechia or Slovakia. ;_; >thank you, I don't really have anyone to vent or talk to except you girls on /bmg/. It's also really nice to hear what people further down the timeline have to say.np np !! >>35560909DA, DT.
>>35555898uh, you doing alright Bea? it’s been a hot minute.>>35559205i think it’s cute that you’ve got friends willing to give you stuff like that. >>35559322>i wasnt wearing anything super facy. just [proceeds to describe the most elaborate outfit imaginable]girl please. half the hoodies i wear out have stains on them…>>35559426ooh. how big’s your colony? i’ve never played but i had a friend who was super into it.>>35559749it’s ok, you’re under no obligation to even be here, let alone give interesting, thoughtful responses.>>35560689desu that’s too true. like the foods i eat have changed to be more nutritious to ensure i’ve got healthy hair, i guess it’s nice to have some extra reason to take care of myself.>>35560870best of luck with your mother! and you’re always welcome to vent here, pretty sure 80% of us have used this thread as a therapy session once or twice.>>35560909yeah, keep bluffing until they say something obvious, no need to show your hand this early.>>35560991you travel a lot huh? what has been your favourite location?
>>35561360>ooh. how big’s your colony? i’ve never played but i had a friend who was super into itIt's really small rn it's just 4 people
>>35561374well you seem to be progressing just fine with smaller numbers, any stand out moment that really drew you into the game?
>>35561360>you travel a lot huh? what has been your favourite location?Japan!! I spent 3 weeks there and it was just the absolute most lovely place i've ever been. 3 weeks didnt even feel like enough time and i sobbed inconsolably when the last night came because it meant going (sorta) home. i say sorta because my connection was an overnight layover that i spent at my friends in Zurich. I also love Scotland and the Netherlands. Right now i think when i get my career started i'm going to be saving up for Thanksgiving break in either Japan/Taiwan/Korea or Portugal/Spain/Morocco- might not be feasible for Thanksgiving but we will see.i spent my first 18 years of life never leaving the Eastern seaboard and only leaving the US once to go to Quebec. so i've kinda gone a little crazy since getting my passport 2 years ago. I've now flown like 95 hours since I got it in 2022. >_<>girl please. half the hoodies i wear out have stains on them…awaaai swear i'm not that fancyy>>35560689itts a pain only to just have it get messed up when you get hit with a gust of wind.
>>35561396Yeah it's going decently well, idk how to get more colonists tho>any stand out moment that really drew you into the game?Nothing in particular ig, I find the game very relaxing and that's why I enjoy it
cum
>>35561637>>35561360its funny too because i never saw myself as a travel girlie? like before i got my passport i barely went anywhere, and first leg of my first long trip solo was genuinely terrible; like i spent years wanting to go to Paris and ended up being jetlagged the entire time in Paris and feeling super culture shocked the whole time. i didnt make it to any museums which sucks because thats a big interest of mine, so now ill have to end up going back to France at some point. but then i got picked up by a English friend of mine who lives in eastern France and we travelled through Belgium together to stay at a friends house in the Netherlands and i turned 24 there, got really unbelievably drunk at a nightclub on the night of my birthday and woke up in the bathroom the next day for us to head to Amsterdam afterwards. after that i ended up having a great time in Amsterdam and wished we had spent more time in the Netherlands but my flight home was two days after i arrived. i then did a spur of the moment trip to California to see some LA friends of mine, went on a date with this cute boy in Irvine, and went to some crazy Hollywood Halloween party that my LA friend's boss ran. it was really weird because i'm not really a halloween person, but yeah, i came out to her that night, so she ended up being the first person i told irl for both being trans and being bisexual in completely different times lol.then the Scotland the first time was so special because i got to spend the whole spring break with my ex gf. we went around the country and it was so nice to have been able to be with her.8mos pass > Germany to Japan to Switzerland to home; which was incredible just the best and i also surprisingly loved Germany in the 12 hours i was stuck in Munich on xmas eve. and then last month i was in Scotland again, but obviously now our relationship is over. so... yeah. huge summary but yeah ive been converted to a travel girly tldr
>>35559322looks like youre just naturally beautiful and fashionable, keep doing whatever it is youre doing.i dont rly get razor burns, probs cuz i use an electric razor, and dont have most of my body, with a few exceptions, including my face ofc>>35559386you could ask other people to give their opinion, for example. personally, i both ask other people, and just kinda power through hearing my voice lol>>35559431maybe i should get a wolf cut too when my hair grows longer? idk how itd work with my 3A/3B hair, but im willing to experimentid say that for now your leg feeling sore is normal? idk how your injections usually go, but whenever ive had a vaccine administrated the place where it was injected was always sore for a while at least>>35560870its nothing lol, the least i can do is hear you out. i agree with you, hearing what people further down the line have to say is indeed nice, almost gives me hopebeing referred to as girl feels different in a good way ughhhj>>35560909gatekeep gaslight girlboss>>35560991what does DA, DT mean>>35561360i may not have an obligation, but i care about all of you, and it feels bad to not be able to properly respond to you all>>35561637woah, you really have traveled yo a lot of places! impressive if you ask me. im glad you enjoyed your travels so far. also, im from portugal lmao, got jumpscared by you mentioning it>i swear i'm not that fancyyyeah yeah, and im the easter bunny>>35561740muk backwards no way>>35561850you really do have a lot of stories about your travels, theyre interesting to read! i dont think ill ever be converted, more of a home person, myself
>>35562055well, i have a fair bit to think about for the coming months. i need to get a new pc, since the one im using rn was borrowed from the school and i gotta hand it back at the end of the year, but that shouldnt be too hard.the hardest part is hrt, which ive decided i will get. i think there was a spot near my home i can send packages and stuff to pick up later. also, does anybody know if its a good idea to start hrt with injections, or monotheraphy? theres a place nearby i could get blood tests at, but its kinda embarrassing, and idk how much itd cost...
>>35562055>im from portugal lmao, got jumpscared by you mentioning itportugal caralho!! ive wanted to visit portugal for a while now. it seems really nice, and ive heard great stories from people who have been. >yeah yeah, and im the easter bunnyawaa , okay maybe a litttle bitttt fancy ;_;>theyre interesting to readthanks! i've had a lot of fun experiences on them, solo travel is really nice because youre far away from home so everything feels kind of transient and liberating. i think thats why ive gotten hooked. >what does DA, DT meanDon't ask, don't tell. Basically if she thinks her coworker suspects soemthing, but the coworker hasnt directly confronted her or was merely just testing the waters. its better for both sides to forget about it for now. >looks like youre just naturally beautiful and fashionable, keep doing whatever it is youre doing.thankssss, i do try. ive been long obsessed with how i present myself i guess; i blame my teenage dysphoria and anxiety for me finding myself in /fa/ at 14. >maybe i should get a wolf cut too when my hair grows longer? idk how itd work with my 3A/3B hair, but im willing to experimentcurly wolf cuts are definitely possible, and look super super cute, but honestly hair care for curly hair is way out of my league so i cant make any statements. >idk how your injections usually gostick the needle into the thigh muscle. the soreness is pretty much exactly where i administered so, yeah. probably normal. >>35562091congrats!! you can always ask them over at /hrtgen/, theyre super helpful and knowledgable in my experience. >>35556612 no clue how much labs cost where you are, but uh being trans is ultimately a bit of an exercise of getting comfortable with the uncomfortable- so dont get embarrassed to ask for your levels and the other stuff they check for.
>>35562233>portugal caralho!!btw naoto, do you know what caralho means lolits nice, to visit at least ig>litttle bitttt fancy ;_;though so>thanks! i've had a lot of fun experiences on themi can understand the feeling, but as i said, im not really one to go to a new place, even ones near where i live, much less another country altogether>Don't ask, don't tell.tyty, i sometimes just dont get what ppl are saying, sorry. and yeah, thats what i think is best for the situation rn>thankssss, i do try.im probably going to have to start trying eventually, ugh. rn i just wear whatever, as long as its comfortable and hides my skin and features>curly wolf cuts are definitely possiblei see. well, its reassuring that its doable, even if you dont know how to take good care of hair like mine lol>congrats!!oh, uh, i havent actually ordered it yet, i just decided i will in the near future.yeah, maybe i should go and ask there, in fact, i should probably be there more in generali guess youre right, i just think im going to end up extremely embarrassed, considering i was unable to talk about trans stuff to any of the therapists ive had so far lol
>>35562410>do you know what caralho means I do lol i grew up in an area with lots of Portuguese>considering i was unable to talk about trans stuff to any of the therapists ive had so far it is really hard. it took me 3 months to tell my therapist i was on hrt, and even longer to tell her i want to be a woman. it's a process of feeling things out and comfort. i'd prod at my body and gender issues but never explicitly say them outright, until a few weeks back where i full on came out. >yeah, maybe i should go and ask there, in fact, i should probably be there more in generaltheyre very very helpful for any questions you have regarding regimen, levels, etc. whenever you do make that order, then congrats! even deciding to do it soon is a big decision. i would routinely type in the phone number of the clinic and then leave it in my phone and never call until one day i just did? and that was that.
>>35562514>I do lolno way more naoto lore, this is unreal>it is really hard.im proud of you for being brave enough to actually talk about it! my main issues are them not taking it well, and telling my family about it, mostly the latter one, because im paranoid>theyre very very helpfulig ill ask a question wither right before going to sleep, or right after i wake up tomorrow>whenever you do make that order, then congrats!thanks! me saying this is also kinda a way for me to not delay it, since i really dont want to masculinise even further than i already have...also, im going to diy, over here to be able to do it officially you need a therapists referral note iirc, and if youre below 18 you also need parental consent. btw you cant start before 16 unless you diy lol.still, something to that effect does sound like a good ideaunless by call you mean the call for the blood test clinic lolwow, this thread is almost at the bump limit already! time sure flies, huh
>>35561850woah, you’ve certainly been converted. as someone who’s never left her home country, world hopping sounds really fun. > solo travel is really nice because youre far away from home so everything feels kind of transient and liberating(it’s a different message but who cares) this seems super accurate. i tend to feel this way when i sleep somewhere that isn’t my house, i can’t imagine how it feels in another country!>>35562055> but i care about all of youawww, we care about you as well <3>>35562091good job! making that decision isn’t an easy one, but it will work out great in the end.anyway, i’m probably gonna log off for the day, night /bmg/! also, Bea is doing alright. she’s making the best of an unfortunate situation while trying to avoid heat stroke. i don’t think she can respond, but i’m pretty sure she can still read our messages, in which case;we love you Bea!!!
>>35562939>as someone who’s never left her home country, world hopping sounds really fun. if it was cheaper and americans got more free days, id do it more often :')>this seems super accurate. i tend to feel this way when i sleep somewhere that isn’t my house, i can’t imagine how it feels in another country!it's really nice to be far away from home. its not shocking that a lot of important things have happened for me as an adult on trips. like Paris was the first place where i kind of pieced together what kind of woman i wanted to be. California was the first time i went on a date with a boy and the first place i came out someone as trans. and scotland was the first place i girlmoded in. i would have never done this things at home. home is so restrictive in a way even if its comfortable. anyways nighto! new thread may be here when u get up for note. since were only 20 posts from bump limit. >>35562770>no way more naoto lore, this is unreallol yeah, though that's probably the most ill say about where i grew up. i did not like my hometown and try really hard to never go back if i dont have to. >my main issues are them not taking it well, and telling my family about it, mostly the latter one, because im paranoida therapist should never make you uncomfortable. their job is to hear you out and GD is a known thing in the psych world- but obviously trans people are a political topic and a personal opinion magnet, so ymmv. family is a completely different story and i cannot give any advise because i havent even crossed that bridge.>since i really dont want to masculinise even further than i already haveunderstandable. and diy seems the most safest route for euros since seemingly you have to jump through a lot of hoops to get hrt there :/ >unless by call you mean the call for the blood test clinic lolno i meant i put off calling my gender clinic for literally like 12+ months after i decided i wanted to start hrt because i was paralyzed with fear.
>>35562939>awww, we care about you as well <3<3>good job! making that decision isn’t an easy one, but it will work out great in the end.honestly, its scary, but i might be able to hide it during this summer at least.we love you, bea!>>35563072>lol yeah, though that's probably the most ill say about where i grew up.yeah, thats quite alright, i can only be glad that youre not there anymore>a therapist should never make you uncomfortable.its not making me uncomfortable, per se, just not comfortable enough to share this part of me with them. granted, its been a while since i last went to one, but still...yeah, im not coming out to family anyways, but thanks for hearing me out nonetheless>understandable. and diy seems the most safest route for eurosyeah, hoops i cant afford time wise, since therapists kinda decide when youre suited for it. i have a friend whose therapist says shes too depressed for hrt, and should get a job and other stuff, basically just a way to not let her go on hrt.>no i meant i put off calling my gender clinicah, i just wanted to make sure i got it right.sorry to hear something like that happened, but hey, at least youve started now! youve come super far!gnighto naoto, and the rest of bmg!have a wonderful rest of day, and sleep well!
>>35563268>since therapists kinda decide when youre suited for it. i have a friend whose therapist says shes too depressed for hrt, and should get a job and other stuff, basically just a way to not let her go on hrt.yeah that sounds consistent from what ive hear d about getting hrt in europe :/ >i can only be glad that youre not there anymorethankfully yeah. living away from home in a big city does a lot for my personal freedom. i always felt bound there either by others or my parents. night mumu! made my 9 month follow up in advance today too. hoping my levels will be good enough then to potentially ween off spiro soon because this shit sucks and i wish theyd stop giving it out in the US.
>>35563508>>35538045i have an abundance of work to get done, and i did none of it today because i was too busy procrastinating to actually work on it. so its time for bed. hopefully the thread doesnt die overnight, and if it hits bumplimit in that time. feel free to make a new one. nighto frens <3
Has anyone else like started getting treated really weird by people compared to before you started transitioning? Like it varies person to person but besides other differences in how I'm treated like guys showing me more interest or people seeming less scared of me, I've noticed like some people are nicer to me than before but other people act weird or more mean than before. It's frustrating and makes my paranoia spin hard, I'm worried I'm just like over the top anxious about it but I really do think some people are treating me worse and trying to fuck me over because they don't like that I look more feminine and faggy now
>>35563876i feel the same way but i also think it might be mostly in my head honestly
>>35563876I dont know I cant tell because I dont interact with people. It could all be in my head but I think people are like shocked by me when walking past, or disgusted, or overly smily, or nervous now. before they were completely indifferent and had like stone cold face or with women would look away and try not to make eye contact. so yeah maybe i really do look different and maybe i look like uncanny vally territory :/
>>35563876i fear that they may be treating you worse, not necessarily because you look more feminine or faggy, but because you look weaker. some treat you better for this, because you’re less threatening. i’ve found the same desu, people tend to look at me with pity or scorn.
>>35563900>>35563910I'm pretty sure I look way different beyond growing my hair out and laser and stuff, like I get called a woman sometimes now and it never happened before, so I feel like people I know can tell something is up or are just subconsciously treating me differently because "ew, faggot." But like uh yeah I dunno if it's a victim complex. Same shit though I think some people treat me pretty weird now lmfao I think I look like an androgynous faggot freak, I get stared at or people like look away or just act weird but also like some people act really nice to me too now like some women have just come up to start talking to me and stuff>>35563990It might be something like that. I really don't know. Some people that used to be kinda nice to me started being really fucking bitchy to me once I started looking girlier.Here's kinda what I noticed:Women either got like way nicer to me and way friendlier and like talking to me and stuff or they got really fucking mean and bitchy towards meMen might act weird and uncomfortable around me or like act slightly flirtatious or look like they want to fuck me
>messaged my ex gf>now uncontrollably crying baka mitai
Still worth bumping
new thread new thread new thread>>35566775>>35566775>>35566775
