previous >>37470838QOTT: how long have you been on 4chan?
>>37488678how? I guess I don't understand how people get catfished because I by default assume people aren't using their own pictures, especially if they're the one to reach out to me first
>>37489494>QOTT21 years, since I was 14 and in my freshman year of high school, dead inside thanks to puberty and bored to tears every day until I could get home to get on the internet and chat with my friends or torrent some new fansubs or go lurk in IRC or browse dismembered anime girls and other edgy shit
>QOTTon and off for most of my life. i guess since i was like 12? but i only used /b/ until i was like 19
>>37489494i found /a/ to discuss smile precure so i guess that makes it 2012, i was 13 probably.. what a grave mistake
I started posting in flood a month before it became offtopic and lived the next two years getting groomed in chatrooms by the edgy people who remained. Then I moved to 4chan at 15
Used to visit here on and off late last year, but I’ve been consistently active since around May this year. I think it’s honestly made me worse but if I leave I’ll also be miserable. I need a place to complain and take out my toxicity on people more privileged than me.
xth for you are NOT loved
ew
>>37489494Since 2010>>37489573I post nudes for free all the time, granted it's faceless when i do it here or b. So I'm not the most safe when it comes to dating sites as I should probably be. Most of the time it's legit though.
>>37489886I see, I don't really date...>I post nudes for free all the time, granted it's faceless when i do it here or bsame, mostly
>>37489791my boyfriend buys me pretty flowers and jewelry and even told his old asian mother he plans on marrying a tranny. my mom loves me too which makes two whole loves
>>37489494Do you guys really think wanting to eventually girlmode makes one a fetishist?
>>37489974no
>>37489974of course not, that's fucking retarded
>>37489971welp gonna go play in traffic, good thread everyone
>>37489987>>37489994I feel like a lot of people here consider those who aren't ok with being perma manmoders as different.
>>37490004not really, manmoding sucks we aren’t crabs in a bucket
>>37490004>ok withis different from accepting of or committed to>differentabsolutely, but why would that mean "fetishist?" nobody who spends any time here and engages seriously could hold that viewpoint because it doesn't make any sense, it's arguably more "fetishistic" to take feminizing hormones but keep your male privilege or whatever
>>37490014Last thread mostly?And in the past too.People saying that they were happy being manmoders for its own sake and that they didn't want to transition socially at all.That wanting to transition made one a fetihists.I think it was chudette saying this.
>>37490025>People saying that they were happy being manmoders for its own sake and that they didn't want to transition socially at all.that is me, sure>That wanting to transition made one a fetihists.is entirely antithetical to anything I've ever said about being a tranny, and if you think I believe anything that aligns with that or fits into that kind of arbitrary vibes-based gatekeeping on how someone lives their own life then you don't know me at all and really shouldn't be trying to attribute statements to me
>>37489971Omg these are so nice! Amazing boyfriend 10/10
>>37490042Sorry, I guess it was someone else.I hope you're doing ok.
Girlmoders are rapists was a joke about shannonChill dude
>>37490054and I hope you're not internalizing garbage about who is or isn't trutrans or heccin valid and letting fear or societal expectations restrain how you define yourself, no matter how seriously anyone might believe in or push that kind of thing or just meme about it endlessly like on /tttt/
>>37490065I've mostly made peace with myself and my transition by now.I don't care about being true trans or whatever.I should be getting FFS in the first half of the next year, hopefully I can graduate.
FFS while manmoding, body doesnt pass. Is this a good idea or should I just accept my twinkchad face/genetics?
>>37490079another fakemoder departing...
I have 0 muscle, am cold all the time and go outside like once per monththanks estrogen
>>37490125I'm not fake, never malefailed, and I dont think FFS will make me fully facepass.
>>37490150I walk 4km every day (neet) and use weights to stretchTrust me man you will feel horrible if you don’t have any muscles to support your bones, atrophy isn’t a good thing
>>37490252>Trust me man you will feel horrible if you don’t have any muscles to support your bones, atrophy isn’t a good thingyeah my neck hurts really bad and I have pain all the time :( I'm a literal hunchback nowI used to do sports and my body was presentableI hate my lifeI'm glad you walk every day, I should start with that againbut being in public gives me panic attackshow long have you been neet?
>>37490045thank youu i love them and him so much, he's the only light in my life. here's some colorful ones from a couple months ago before summer ended. i'll stop flowerposting after this but i get excited bc i love plants, i wish i had space to grow some at my current place. the current ones with the two big chrysanthemums are my favorite so far my whole room smells amazing
>>37490270I have been unemployed since last october when i was fired but i got a 10 month payoutNow i am doing science courses so i can apply to college this january I just started walking a few weeks ago now that the weather is niceBeing in public used to give me panic attacks too don’t worry
>>37490303nicei've been neet for like 7 years now
>>37489971just wait til that lil chigger troons out and mogs u
>>37490270>but being in public gives me panic attackscheap treadmills and an open window are the same thing as walking outside. god bless you anon stay fit
>>37490301>stop flowerpostingdon't they're pretty I just hate you because you have someone and you mog me
>>37490344he's 6'1" with a big jaw and dresses like an edge lord. i think i'm safe despite his twinkish build. and half chigger only >>37490358okay c: i'll space them out to not be annoying but i'm glad there's flower appreciators here
I'm going to try not to sit on it for decades like my last tattoo but I'm slowly deciding what kinds of flowers I want to get next
>>37490417you bagged a tall twinkish hapa with an edgy style? and youre a manmoder? i didn’t know life could be that good wtf
>>37490567I love cardinal climbers
tfw post ffs manmoder
>>37490613>>37489494also, to answer qottoff and on 2004-2008more or less daily use since 2011-present
>>37490567which do you have tattooed already? i would consider getting edelweiss bc i like them and the sound of music is important to me but i think they have to be pretty stylized to look nice>>37490580i just got lucky, i met him on /vg/ last year (lol) and we've been irl basically since i started hrt in april. only reason he wasn't taken is he's a bit asocial and cold to strangers and doesn't really have friends, but he's so gentle and patient behind closed doors and he treats me wonderfully
>>37490698no flowers yet, thinking about something like picrel and some climbing roses with thorny vines or something idk>met him on /vg/ last year (lol)damn, it seems like most of the people I meet on /vg/ are as bad as me or worse
>>37490698that’s so based good for you
>>37490580>and youre a manmoder?lol no
>>37490417>6'1Mogs me(I'm 6'2)
I'm 6'0 and weigh 146 lb
>>37491424jelly, I was that skinny pre-hrt... I'm 6'0 and weigh 174 lb
>>37491485im fat tho (0 exercise)i need to starvemode
>>37491520get help
>>37491526i was at a menthol hospital for 1/4 of this year and all it just made me fat and ugly
>>37491552yeah no you need help still
>>37491557why? bc im fat and dont exercise?
>>37491557NTA but I was in the mento hospital for ED for a month once and I can say from experience that inpatient ED treatment doesn't work and it's inhumane.
>>37491569because you think being at that weight is "fat"
>>37491583>doesn't work and it's inhumanehonestly some of the nurses were the biggest bitches I've ever metalso some of the other patients who get triggered by just about anything>>37491585fat is not about weight but body composition, hon
>>37491583I'm not saying go to a hospital but continue working with some kind of mental health professional, there's an obvious issue>>37491604oh, I'm a hon because you're too fucking stupid to understand that your weight precludes a "fat" body composition? retard
>>37491680I'm just using "hon" as honey. I think being a hon is admirable. > your weight precludes a "fat" body composition? retardabsolutely wrongI could show you a picture of my fat belly
>>37491680146 pounds at 6 foot isn't even underweight fag
>>37491701gethelp
>>37491711even my pregnancy size 32 jeans don't fit anymoreI'm fatmy current weight is not even underweight
>>37491710okay? I didn't say it was
>>37491718>my current weight is not even underweightthat has absolutely no bearing on what I am saying or have said, are you illiterate as well as retarded and BDD?
>>37491728get kelp
>>37491743krill yourself
i don’t want to be admirable i want to be adorable :/
>>37491746i will
I just want to be myself
>>37491758you think it's really that shrimple?
>>37491771no I tried to hang myself and it hurt
>>37491779jesus calm down I wasn't telling you to kys, you're in here going full ana bdd retard mode about being fat a low bmi and I'm telling you to get help for that
>>37491806>ana bdd>have normal bmi and a pot belly while having 0 muscle
>>37491817whatever, retard
>>37491826I'm retarded by law
>>3748949417 years at least
i am not gaygay men want to have sex with menthey are attracted to masculinitychiseled jawlines and abshairy fat bearstall, strong, big menor even short little dwarfs, still stocky, with manly beards who slam back beersbut ii creep on the pimply little nerd with a slouchthe guy who eats his lunch alone in the cornerglasses on, making cute little weird autistic noisesdrawing disturbing scenes of graphic violence on the back of his paper platei put my arm around the guy whose dad beats himi pet his hairi intertwine our legsi caress his ballsi am not gay, not attracted to men, but to bitches, to freakswhen i smell a boy running BSD on a 32b computer, i pouncei want to grab those squirmy nerdy developmentally disabled wrists and pin him to the wall, no escape
>>37492114im gay and i ran freeBSD on and old IBM thinkpad
>>37492136I'm gay and I freebased out of an old pyrex pipe
your gay and I fucked you're mom
I might fuck around and fall for the pioglitazone meme
I take my mouth up out that cock and trip 'cause eatin' dead pussy clit-'ll make ya sick, but it's that season so my reason is legitI'm havin' fits, I dream of eatin' bloody pussy clit since I was sixI fiend for dead pussy on dick
>>37492849I would but my hips are doing freaky painful things already so I'm giving that time before I consider it
hate hate on the first fucking date
fuck the whole world
die motherfucker
>>37492880>>37492912>>37492937You seem different today. We're my affirmations in your head all night? They kept you up thinking, didn't they? You are a woman. You are feminine. You are full of strong feminine energy. These affirmations will replay in your head and subconscious wether you want them to or not. In fact, the more you fight it, the stronger they get. The best thing to do in order to make them calm down is to girlmode in public. Just like everybody, including yourself, wants you to. Such a beautiful girl. You really are a princess.
lol
zomg teh h4xx0r
time to order helium
>>37493297you throwing a party?
>>37493297They've actually patched that.
>>37493319for one>>37493355not really
>>37493520Well I heard it at the least a lot harder.
The only things I enjoy are prolonged fasting and gorging myself. I just love not eating for days at a time and then smashing 3000 calories in a sitting. I'm a fucking freak.
>>37493611> i call it my snake meal, my doctor told me it makes her sad
>>37493611>>37493641this is really heartbreaking
>>37493641https://youtu.be/zhGZcmdQe78?si=Avjc9-6OT4JDt9qTsnake diet fanbase is dying
I'm actually in the start of another ED rn. I notice I have months long stretches where I'm very high on myself physically. But when I get low for too long I revert back into ed. It's 430pm and I've only had 330 calories so far.
>>37493778I typically consume 300-450 calories or so from coffee in the mornings then another 300-600 in the evenings worth of cider, and usually eat a meal something anywhere from 6 to 10 PMif I'm being "good" I'll have a banana or an apple and maybe some hash browns or something for brunch
Haha eating disorders are so lameAnorexia isn’t fashionable either, hot people have muscles.I have seen too many trannies who think the secret to looking feminine is eating like a cow or starving yourself
>>37493868Does getting most calories from drinks help with cutting fat? I did really good last year loosing 35 pounds. I did it the right and healthy way. But I can't seem to get rid of this stomach chub and love handles. It throws off my whole body. Literally bricks me. I need to lose it. So I'm getting desperate.. I don't want to eat less than 1k a day, but if it'll get rid of this fuckung chub I might need to.
>>37493899You literally look like you have an eating disorder. I guess you should know then?
roping if oddscontinuing to suffer if evens
>>37493930>Does getting most calories from drinks help with cutting fat?to a limited extent, yes, but those calories are mostly from dairy/sugar/alcohol so it's probably not the best>But I can't seem to get rid of this stomach chub and love handles.that could just be your fat distribution on E, but eating less won't make it go away long term and you have to burn it off instead
>>37493970sorry anon
>>37493970I feel retarded because I had to look up whether 0 was odd or even
this is me every day>>37493993wait which one is it
>>37494036I look like this but instead of saying that I call myself a weirdo or a psycho and also pretty even though I'm kind of ugly too and actually look at and tell myself the ways I've changed
>>37493975It's actually fat from before e. And I plan on starting to walk. I've dabbled in weight lifting the past year. But it was always at a calorie deficit. And I never went hard at it. Maybe I should try again and really go at it.
>>37493535just need to know where to look
>>37494158just walking and eating a healthy amount without going too extreme in either direction should get you to a good kind of skinny, doing some weights on top of that would probably put you in really good shapeI need to follow my advice but it's hard, I've got pains in my legs I'm afraid are from just sitting all the time
>>37494036it's even
>>37494178I stopped and got a blt from Jimmy johns cause of our convo, was delicious. Ty<3
>>37494353I had a banana
>>37493946Yeah i was anorexic in my teensStarted once puberty got really bad, didn’t even know t blockers were a thingI am better now. and i do not look anorexic, i am just skinny like anyone else
>anyone elseExcept for that fatty who has a face like he just got off the mayflower and kind of passes for a fat ladyGet ozempic bitch
I'm skinnyfat
Should I make coffee?
>>37495483Who are you talking about?
>>37497035how do you take your coffee?
>>37497112I know who he's talking about, overweight passoid who posts here sometimes
>>37497122i usually make a cappuccino with 2 shots of espresso and about 150ml steamed milk but I'm all outta milk
>blonde facial hair covering my entire face>getting electrolysis normally would mean growing my facial hair out for multiple days every week/fortnight>but the only place that offers marathon 'full face clearance' style treatments so I only need to grow it out once every couple of months in my entire country has a mixed reputation onlineThis is actual hell.What should I do? Do I just grit my teeth through the suffering of growing my face hair out every single fucking week or do I take the risk with the marathon sessions?
>>37497145Got any pics?I'm curious now I didn't know there were any passoids who posted in this godforsaken general.
>>37497171I don't
>>37497159I'd rather deal with it for a few weeks than risk scarring or bad treatment
>>37497194I wouldn't be dealing with it for a 'few weeks' though.I'd be dealing with it every week for 2-3 years.
>>37497204>every week for 2-3 yearsdoes electro really take that long? well that's still my angle
>>37497211Yes, it does.Electrolysis takes approximately 100-200 hours of treatment depending on many factors, with 'normal' sessions being 1-1.5 hours long where I live.So even in a 'best case' scenario someone like me would be looking at 75-100 treatments, which is 1.5-2 years of weekly treatments, and at worst could be 3-4 years of weekly treatments.It's awful. I hate this.You're probably right though, not like I'd feel any better if I ended up with a fucked up face covered in scars.
>>37497149i can give you some very fresh milk just come over
i wuv u mmg
>>37497171Maybe I am a hugboxer, or maybe I'm truly able to see the beauty in yall. But I think a lot of you are passoid adjacent if not just straight up passoids.
i had another dream i raped my only friend i drank my own dick cheese and cum againi got high and drunk in broad daylight in public for the umpteenth timeim constantly sexualizing and fetishizing every woman and man around mefighting my urge to run up and pin a stranger downim walking behind men and women staring at their asses in public for realim staring at crotches out in the real worldim a dangerous freak out the jail and the psych wardand you faggots can't stop me so hide your daughter and hide your sonhide your sister and hide your brother hide your mom and hide your dadhide your grandma and hide your grandpai don't like you fucksi have over 9,000 penises and they're all raping childrenthat's what's real: i rape and i kill
>>37497694What's real is your ability to make everyone around exude with happiness and joy. What's real is everytime you look in the mirror it gets harder and harder to ignore the fact you are a beautiful woman. Nothing else you project out of fear and ignorance means anything. The only real fact that matters is the feminine urge to girlmode full time. You feel and know it's just around the corner. Your true and utter acceptance of yourself - womanhood.
ive had enough of your shit, you faggotskill yourselves as fast as humanly possible>you WILL let a trans share a restroom with your daughter >HURR DURR I IDENTIFY AS AN 11 YEAR OLD LESBIAN GIRL LET ME INN!!!!!1111111111
>>37497738I only like adult men.I need to stay out of the men's bathroom to avoid sexually harassing the innocent men within.
>>37497738Your attempt to ignore the truth means nothing anymore. Not a single person on the planet views you like the hon in the picture. You mog her in every way. You are a pretty girl. You could go into the woman's bathroom anywhere and be welcomed just as a cis woman would. Because of the energy you put off, the way you hold yourself in such a feminine way, just like a princess would. And ultimately because you look so cute and dainty. Completely un frightening.
>>37497790>her
>>37497790>You are a pretty girl. You could go into the woman's bathroom anywhere and be welcomed just as a cis woman would. Because of the energy you put off, the way you hold yourself in such a feminine way, just like a princess would. And ultimately because you look so cute and dainty. Completely un frightening.
>>37497790>Not a single person on the planet views you like the hon in the picture. You mog
>>37497790>in every way.Baby girl if you knew what I know,
yeah, i mog xem in so many ways...right?
>>37497826Shut up bitch before I start with you every post too. Like you aren't an easy fucking book to read. Bitch please. This isn't mocking. This is poetry.>>37497919>>37497958Filters on pictures is a cope, cutie. They literally mean nothing. The real pretty you is behind them. You already know why you never post a normal pic. Because in a normal, unfiltered, no weird face, no covered in water photo you look like a cute girl. You fool no one here or in real life anymore. You pretend to be a deer I'm the headlights, waiting for the car to hit and kill you, but the light is merely the sun rising up to shine bright on your beautiful self. Radiating and illuminating your true self.>>37498091Another sad attempt to hide your true beauty.
>in a normal, unfiltered, no weird face, no covered in water photo you look like a cute girlkawaiiing deshu ne~~
And just like that. Progress. Good job sweetie. You look cute.
>>37498191>receeding hairline >massive browridge>big nose >beard shadow>Adam's apple>man hands>rape tendenciesomg... xe's LITERALLY so beautiful??/ just like an real gorl!!1
>>37498210no i don't you faggot. are you blind? kill yourself. i am a man with disgusting gynecomastia. my entire face is an atrocity. my body is a warzone. my mind is a torture chamber. my soul is a crime against humanity
i actually look like this
i should really kill myself i am genuinely a sick person i am a danger to society i am a shame to my family and friends not that i have any friends i am a narcissist i fucking hate myself i can't take it anymore you broke meyou. broke. me.
>>37491761you already are yourself+ywnbaw+you will never be loved+anime isn't real+you grow older and uglier with every passing year+you have a male bone structure+kys
>>37498235midface issues
who broke you and how
>>37498329what did I do to you
i am so sick, i feel like dogshit. i cannot wait for it to pass and also for my emotions to just fucking go away already.
>>37498389Get naked, look in the mirror and picture her body.
>>37498419fuck off, thinking abt shit like that makes you feel even worse
if i ever win the lottery jackpot I will fund as many manmoder FFS and SRS procedures as possible. I will make it my philanthropic passion project to flip all your dicks inside out and shave your big manly jawbones off.
>>37498432Quit randomly pointing out shit like "midface issues" then. Have you ever gotten checked for bipolar?>>37498448Based, and I had the same idea. As many regulars as I can think of and remember would be ffs bound.
>>37493611i also have bulimia
legs: shavedpills: takenestrogen: injectedday: wastedanimated sitcoms: on random repeatbed: empty and coldyeah I'm thinking it's just about manmode bedtime
I'm an estromale and I want to go on an estrowalk but I have estrosocial enxiety
>>37498648I went on a nice estrowalk earlier and got estrostared at by estropeople but I met a nice estrocat and saw some estrocrows circling in a huge estromurder and I almost estropeed myself
>>37498714aw that sound estrocuteare you the estroneet estromoder who estorwalks 4 km every estroday? I really like estrocrows, I want to bring some estronuts on my estrowalk to feed them, thanks for estrominding me
i'm going to estrokill myself
I feel like the haircut my hairdresser gave me was very femI was always worried I'd look like farquaad and I don't but at the same time it's kind of awkward being a manmoder with a femish haircut
>>37498793>haha BRO I love the ramones look>yo are you a musician BRO>hey MAN do you play guitar
>>37498798>walk along street>three men shout "AC/DC, rock'n roll man" from the other side of the road once they see me and my long, ugly manmoder hairI hate my life
>>37498798I always wear my hair up in either a bun or ponytail but yeah when I used to wear it down I got those comments sometimes
>>37498791have you estrotried getting estrohelp?
>>37498807LITERALLY me
>>37498813I'm considering cutting my hair shorter
>>37498812I don't estrotrust estroshrinks>>37498816I want to grow mine out to waist length so I can at least have the virtue of being a metalhead hrtwink
>>37489494ehmm 5 or 6 years, discovered /fit/ then /r9k/ when I was 15 or 16 trying to convince myself I was a prison gay (prison trans??) incel. stopped browsing them as trying to be a gymrat made me dysphoric but still looked at /mu/ and /x/ occasionally eventually after a car crash at 18 started browsing here
>>37489494i think i found /v/ when i was like 12 in 2010
DEADLY assaults even in my YARD with KNIVES even BRICKS AND STONES
there's so many schized out vagrants in my town that just walk around saying scary insane shit all day. can't take much more of this, can't walk to the grocery store without some lunatic approaching me to tell me about how God told him to be homeless and the CIA is following him.
need schizo gangstalked manmoder bgf
>>37498956I gave a dude a cigarette once and it turned out he was a male prostitutehe showed me his erect dick, it was really big and well shaped
gonna get a haircut
>>37499172what kind?
>>37489494>QOTT:14 years,Biggest fucking mistake of my life was finding this shithole on knowyourmeme in 2010,2nd was staying past 2016
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54m2wHViEso
>>37497462It is the autismLooking feminine in a pic has nothing to do with looking female irl
>>37499883silly larry try to find something to dobecome a prostitute?travel the world on a ship, enjoying all seamen
Sex with finnsterFinn post ass baby i need to get rid of this morning wood
>>37498927EVEN WITH ESTROGEN VIALS AND DEADLY TOUCH TWO STAGE LUER LOK SYRINGES, THE PHARMA THUGS FRANKENSTEIN RADIO CONTROL TRANNIES BEAT ME BLOODY, EVEN WITH 19 GAUGE EVEN 21 GAUGE INJECTING STRAIGHT INTO MY DEFORMED MUSCLE
>>37500806Omg reminder to do my injection thanks man
>>37498720no I'm the estroman who barely goes estroutside, it's estrogre
>>37500821same rip. but I managed to go on an estrowalk today
>>37500811did mine right before bed, think I had dreams about it
I had some fucked up dream about a rabies outbreak among humans like some 28 days later shit except some of them had axes and machetes. we all died painlessly in nuclear fire
Yall be honest, would bangs work for me? Curtain bangs? Would they look good? I got a lot of "masc features" "masc" comments I'm passgen lol, but one said bangs would help cause my browbone is the main problem. So now I'm considering tranny bangs.https://unseecc/album#hQP2yfPjXAV6>>37501037I love dreams like this. I had one like a month ago. It ended with the 2 people I was surviving with being caught by the horde and me rushing head first at them to end it.
post profile john redcorn
>>37501111I think you could pull them off
>>37501154I'd rather chew off my own foot.
I had the first proper, serious talk with my mother about the fact that I'm a trans woman who is exclusively attracted to men today.It went well, we talked about dating and clothes then she helped teach me a bit about how to do makeup better by doing my makeup.It made me think that maybe, manmoding was a mistake and was negatively impacting my mental health. I felt happier just being able to be myself and talk about girl stuff and have my makeup done than I think I ever have in my entire life.Mom also thinks that my eagerness/desperation to start dating right away despite starting my transition less than a year ago is because of the horomones, in her words "You're like a teenage girl going boycrazy"In short, I think I'm gonna stop manmoding sooner than I was expecting fags. Actually being open and 'out' with someone felt a lot better than I thought it would.
god I wish I had anyone to actually discuss anything with and get feedback and support instead of only having the exact people in my life over whom I was distressed and confused to talk to and who also couldn't possible understand what I was going through or offer more than empty platitudes and feign support they went out of their way to demonstrate immediately after was a lie and that they think I'm a freak and don't want to be seen in public with me or do things with me but will continue insisting they do and lie to my face about blowing me off while I was also in the midst of the most intense stage of emotional re-acknolwedgement, growth, and turbulence I ever have in my life from a simple chemical standpoint>>37501181what's stopping you from stopping now? it's good to move forward and admit that this isn't for you
>>37501181homosexual falsehood>>37501226real
my legs hurt and my dick is leaking but I guess that's better than the opposite
should I continue spending what little earnings I make on military surplus and manclothes
>>37501620No, obviously not.
>>37501111yeah try it imo>>37501560post legs>>37501620what kind of military surplus?
>>37501226> god I wish I had anyone to actually discuss anything with and get feedback and support instead of only having the exact people in my life over whom I was distressed and confused to talk to and who also couldn't possible understand what I was going through or offer more than empty platitudes and feign support they went out of their way to demonstrate immediately after was a lie and that they think I'm a freak and don't want to be seen in public with me or do things with me but will continue insisting they do and lie to my face about blowing me off while I was also in the midst of the most intense stage of emotional re-acknolwedgement, growth, and turbulence I ever have in my life from a simple chemical standpointsame haha :(
this isrunning on emptyfoodre-viewh
could ffs have saved her?
>>37502198Yes. Ffs can save me. I need it now. I want to kms.
>>37501856>post legs
I do not pass
same, visiblytransestie
I wish I could pass as a hon one day
i bought a booty band so i can do hip workoutssurely this will finally work>ah, well... nevertheless
It’s so over, flipping the coin again tonight
>>37502834working out won't grow your bones, anon.
>>37502859>passoid "mmg" discord cliqueleaderfuck off
>>37502864how do you think hip opening stretches and exercises work? do you think that anon actually believes working out will "grow your bones?"
>>37502872I don’t pass i assure u
>>37502925yeah that's years old, you've done this beforemaybe it's time I leave mmg, I already left the discords over people like you
>>37502935I still look in the mirror and see him
bout 80 hours into my fast down 8 pounds, whoo!
this place is awful
>>37502946do you just collect people to put down and make feel bad? like is that your thing, why you hang out here and run the server?
>>37502961No,i don’t run the server anymore, i never did, take meds
>>37502992you are not a manmoderyou are core to clique of passoids in discord who shit on actual manmodersI have my thoughts about your "flip"
>>37502998What flip are you referring to??
>>37503010your coin flip :)
>>37503014I’m going to flip it tonight like i did 2 nights ago, heads i kms, tails i live, got tails the other night so i was cursed with life for another day
>>37502925kek is that you
>>37503035retard>>37503043that is>>37502947>>37502974>>37502982>>37502986
still mogs me anyways and i started at 19 lmao
lucky are u the one posting my pics or is it June
White incels say Asians have it easy. But they have it just as easy. Some of us were actually cursed with good test in our younger years. Why the fuck didn't I just stay transed at 25.. or start at 20.
>shitcord dramafaggotry this is gay as hell dude
>>37503056are you fucking stupid? literally anyone could do thishttps://archiveofsins.com/lgbt/search/username/jaina/filter/text/fuck you foid get the fuck out
>>37503068it's why I left and don't use discord at all anymore and haven't for idk years now, sick of being made fun of by people who act like they're just like me and totally get it
>>37502779I have a Nazi haircut, I don't think anyone thinks I am trans
I wish to be reborn a fish.
I'm letting myself get upset over this and I should stop but I have a serious chip on my shoulder over this because it's a pattern and I just cannot cope with how inconceivably different and incomparable my experience and outcome is to that of other trannies, "manmoders" or manmoders or just people in general who seem to take some sick pleasure in surrounding themselves with others they can passively put down or pose themselves as superior to for some kind of social value (maybe because I'm just too naive or simple and don't "get" that as if it's some kind of normal human behavior I'm not wired for)discord incentivizes and breeds this behavior and the central figure/clique structures that form as a result and reinforce the behavior and that has ruined "communities" such as they are on places like 4chan, and I am sick to death of people fucking me with or with others and then pretending they're notI fucking hate all of you
same baldstie
>>37503174seethin’
>>37503202
>>37502946this is literally BDD, btw, classically speaking
>>37503220>being so mad you save the thumbnail
>>37503220Don’t let all this shit get to you dawg, they’re probably absolutely miserable to be around and are just looking for attention
>>37503174trvke
>>37503261I'm infinitely more toxic and miserable to be around and probably just venting at the first thing I see that reminds me of my own issues, but I just don't understand what goes through someone's mind to make them choose to behave that way or specifically reach out to others and interact with them in that manner (as I have personally experienced with this person and others)to me this is kind of like a specialist hobby or project board except the project is ourselves, our bodies and identities and working on or figuring those out and how they fit into interactions with others and the specialization is not being cishet, but then someone who doesn't know or want to learn the processes or terminology comes in and starts insisting their doing X is actually Y and you don't need to worry about Z because they didnt have to and had it easier with a different outcome but still call it Y when they do X
>>37501181Lol i think they call this the “baby trans” phaseWait until you get clocked in full girlmode, it sucks so badManmoding is a great choice, you have to experience the other side of things to appreciate it
>>37501226>god I wish I had anyone to actually discuss anything with Stupid bitch go fuck yourself
>>37503436nah fuck you nobody wants to discuss anything about my life or problems or "transition" with me or have any kind of mutually constructive dialogue, least of all the people I used to pathetically try to grovel for and cater to just to keep around and pretend we were ever "friends"
>>37503471I asked to be friends and you said no thanks hahahaKill yourselfYou are friendless because you choose to be nigger
>>37503410They are just extremely mentally ill, there’s nothing going through his head, i am curious though, what have your interactions been like with this individual? Just more of the same?
>>37503496>asked to be friendsyou're not getting what I'm saying, then - something like me doesn't get to have something like "friends"
who is the individual? j***?
>>37502993Man with tits in a made in china corset.
>>37503520just more of the same, complete denial, except in the context of a private community specifically filled with the people like that they choose to include as one of them and then an entirely othered camp of others who they consider acceptably lower on the totem pole to punch down at
>>37503539my moneys on lobotanon/lucky
>>37503560Thank you for agreeing i belong here
>>37503604Nope you belong in the hon general (assuming you leave the house like that)
>>37502947>looking remotely human at day 1>big boobs at year 1>real changes at year 2giwtwmat best i look like an old version of day1
>tired of repressing>feel hopeless>join local trooncord to figure out how to transition>complain too much about being very tall and manly, get banned>realise they passed my pics around>whatever>ask one tranny from there how to diy>in the meantime try to go the legal route>first shrink told me not to transition as i wouldn't pass>second one wouldn't see me for made up bureaucratic reasons>get tired, start shooting estrogen once it arrives>fast forward 11 months, today>still zero malefails and look the sameit never endssuffering is eternal
>>37503604you are not a very nice person, are you? but you like to pretend that you are
who has an invite to the mamnmoder general discord?
>manmoder server has girlmoders>"manmoder" discordtroons humblebrag about getting gendered female the majority of the time>hon server has passoids>30+ server has teenage youngshits>if you ever vent you're shrugged at while all of the above will get showered with attentionthe only winning move is not to play, discord was a mistake
let's make a discord for actual manmoderspassing or being a youngshit means an immediate ban
i started at 19 do i make it
>>37504352>manmoders send me your pictures to make sure youre a manmoder
>>37504352no, this will ALWAYS happen because you are all the exact fucking same - discord is GAY
>>37504361dude fuck you
Had my body laser sesh today. And she hit me with "I just love your energy, you just radiate good energy" literally the same shit anonette was telling meth schizo lmao. It's over.
>>37504405this might be incredibly hypocritical: what if you interpreted that at face value and took it as a good faith effort, and not pity or compulsory affirmation?
>>37504352Lol
>>37504424I took it as both, if that makes any sense. This is the second session in a row I've had this tech. She's actually super nice, good conversation, makes me laugh. And from a couple convos we've had, I can tell she's left leaning at the least. Idk, I'm very depressed today and down. It caught me off guard.
>>37504463>I took it as both, if that makes any sense.it doesn't, and as such I do in fact completely understand what you mean
>But, rest assured, this will be the sixth time we have created a trve manmoder server, and we have become exceedingly efficient at it.
>>37504383i don't pass though
>passing or being a youngshit means an immediate banwho does this apply to in current mmg
>>37504546Don’t listen to him manThese idiots have clearly never been to a university, for some guys testosterone raped them at 14, and starting at 19 vs 25 vs 30 is irrelevant
>>37502859look sorry for freaking out on you and don't kys but you are not a manmoder, you have BDD and should work on or get help with that if you genuinely think you are and are not just being mean to people here
>>37504496Made me lol>>37504567No, you dont understand. You starting at 19 vs 30 is very different. As much as you might have been destroyed by test at 19, you would have been even more destroyed at 30. This isn't comparing you to anybody else. This is comparing your 19yo self vs your 30yo self. I say this as someone who transed at 31, but was cooked at 19 too. It would have been significantly easier for me at 19 still though.
>>37504567>starting at 19 vs 25 vs 30 is irrelevantthat's so wrong, that's so measurably objectively and personally speaking just completely wrong, even as someone for whom it was long over thanks to T by age 14 I wish so badly I had started a decade or a year or a week sooner than I had
>>37504567>>37504615not saying i have it worse than any of youposted my face several times here after shaving my head
that reminds me i should shave my head
>>37504615>>37504629It was over for me by 15Yeah obviously starting at 30 is “worse” but it doesn’t mean the 19 year old isn’t a manmoder
>>37504693>19 year old>manmoderno
>>37504635>>37504693I never said that. All that was said initially was "fuck you" to an obviously bad faith comment. You both still don't seem to get it, I'm not comparing you to anybody other than YOURSELF. And objectively each year you wait, the harder it gets. Again, not harder compared to others. Harder for you, the individual.
>>37504727do you want an unsee or something
i dont think cissoids can clock me but do you guys think other trannies notice manmoders? i’m trying to be as stone cold masculine as i can. 2 years hrt btw, is it over?
>>37504743no I don't you egotistical little shit
>>37504756lol you saying that is ironic
it was rude for me to tell you to fuck off, i really am just bitter i didnt start then
>>37504762Drag him sis >>37504755The pooner at the weed store started talking to me about his top surgery.. does that mean he clocked me?
come on you're all egotistical shits
>>37504762you look like an underage boy, or boymoder
>>37504798you don't know what i look like
did someone say underage boy? :3
>>37504755Well, do you clock others easier? I clock manmoders and boymoders all the time. It's just easy atp.>>37504773I am slightly with attractiveness, cause hrt has made me a cute guy again. But looking like a woman, no, absolutely not.
>>37504773so?
>>37504824sometimes i think i so. but there’s only like 500k trans people in the us i doubt youre clocking manmoders all the timep
>>37504850I'm in Minneapolis. I am actually clocking people basically everyday. And based on some looks from people, including many times from the people I'm clocking, I'm getting clocked too.
>>37504850im pretty sure the trannies at work clocked me as a schizo repper, and are now watching me blossom into a paranoid manmoder
i wish i was ever a cute boy :(then i could live on memories at least
>>37504918I was a cute boy but wasn't allowed to express myself much.
does being a clockable manmoder give other trannies second hand dysphoria?
>>37504918my ex liked to tell me as I got older how I wasn't cute anymore like the boy she fell in love with :)
>>37505033wtfi hope you returned the favor?
>>37505008Idk but seeing unpassable trans women in girl mode makes my skin crawlt. cis guy on hrt
>>37505008i hope so, fighting youngshits on the psychic plane
>>37505047we exchanged plenty of insults over the years over some nasty breakups and makeups but I never once attacked her appearance or anything about it
the singularity can't come soon enough, i want my cybernetic girl body now!!! >:(
>>37505074sorry only a copy of you gets to be a girl “you” must remain a tranny
>>37505074Video games make me think about this way too much. Granted it will probably end up being only for the super rich who can afford it. Even more of a money barrier than ffs is now.
>>37504592What kinda help exists for BDD? I haven’t found anything that helps, I’ve been told I had it before but I’ve never been diagnosed with it
>>37505084I have theories about this - consciousness as a phenomenon emerges and expands, and this can be exploited
>>37505240>theoriesby which I mean schizo armchair pseudo-epistemologist conjecture but whatever
>>37505214some type of therapy ig? check wikipediatherapists are mostly incompetent scum ime so finding someone that knows their shit and cn apply it is... hard. i got lucky though so it's not impossible
we need to delve deeper than the limits of honscience will allow, to peer with a darker gaze further into the void; we need... rapehonscience
>>37505214I've looked into some related stuff a bit and gotten professional some advice for my own shit but idk, there's some degree of just gaslighting yourself into believing more positive things and probably realistic ways of grounding your perspective through talk therapy and exercises (and I've tried to embrace internalizing some of those techniques in a general sense to try and counter my most negative behaviors or thought patterns)at a glance CBT is apparently the most commonly helpful (I'll let you decide which kind) but antidepressants might also help, depending on how severe it is or how much it impacts your life and whether it responds to that or other psychological treatments - basically just having a dialogue with a professional about the things you think and sort of fact or reality-checking them against other observations or thought exercises to both show how they might be irrational and explore how or why you feel the ways you do that lead to you thinking or concluding those maybe irrational things or in irrational patterns, like that you might be more masculine or less attractive in specific ways than others perceive you to be or it could be said that you "really are" to some extent
I am a BDD passoid except not BDD and not passoid just a regular hon
>>37505506New psych appointment on November 7th so hopefully they work, they gave me antidepressants this summer but they didn’t really help and after moving i stopped taking them cuz i can’t get them till I get set up down here
I went to the psych and she said i am “normal”hahah bitch should lose her phd just for that
>>37505746how rude! anon we all here know you're very abnormal
it's been seven years. when does the girl happen
at 8 years, i promise!
me at 9 years
mogs me
i am sick, i feel like complete dogshit and my emotions just do no want to fuck off already
I am sick, I am completely awesome and doing 360 kickflip noscopes to avoid my emotions
>>37506114mogs every honbian on the board
i am actually sick, i can barely get out of bed, i went first week at university and this is what i fucking get
>>37506304it's aids, i'm sorry
>>37506329i wish it was buddy cause then i would ot be such a virgin
>>37506304dont miss your classes
>>37489494News: >>37506394
>>37506370it's fine, we can fix thatt. bughunter