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File: Ebanzuke 2026.05.jpg (405 KB, 1000x758)
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>Ebanzuke edition.
The Grand Sumo tournament for May 2026 starts tomorrow at 08:30 JST.

>Banzuke:
http://sumodb.sumogames.de/Banzuke.aspx
https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoBanzuke/index/

>Fight Schedule & Results:
https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoMain/torikumi/1/1/
>Some sumo links and how to watch live:
https://rentry.org/uwbgc88d

Off-basho /xs/ thread >>>/xs/261447
>>
File: Sumopedia.png (2.25 MB, 1822x1005)
2.25 MB PNG
First for VPN + ABEMA.
>>
2nd for Dan will never become Ozeki again.

Screencap this post. I am always 100% right on my predictions.
>>
File: 1761769279903340.jpg (29 KB, 520x476)
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I have to say I am not feeling much enthusiasm for this basho
Half the roster is injured
The only good yokozuna is out

It just feels underwhelming, like a filler tournament
>>
Dan is kill and so is my interest in this tournament.
>>
>>154580373
Nobody cares about that pasty faggot
Him being out is the only upside
>>
>>154580372
>>154580373
Sucks how the other hundreds of wrestlers are all injured too so there is no sumo to watch.
>>
File: Mongolian feast.png (2.2 MB, 1600x900)
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>Meanwhile in Mongolia
This is our time!
>>
>>154580422
Imagine being born mongolian
What a nightmare
>>
File: TMD.jpg (466 KB, 843x561)
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>>154580422
Let's goooooooooo
>>
Reminder that Dan is the one who blew up Onosato's shoulder.
>>
>>154580641
What a stupid fucking post
>>
File: 2026-05-09_07-14.png (74 KB, 472x501)
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>>154580669
It actually was thobeit. Were you not watching sumo last November or something?
>>
>>154580669
It's true. Dan literally killed the rising Japanese hope and now the yakuza is going to make him pay dearly for that for the rest of his entire life.
>>
File: I am back bitches.png (496 KB, 929x963)
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>soon
>>
https://www.stablemasters.ca/

15 hours left to get your fantasy sumo picks in.
>>
>retards so stupid they cant even tell whats stupid about their stupid shitpost

Fucking classic.
>>
>>154580881
Ive got, Horse, Atamifuji, Fujinokawa, Asanoyama, and Fujiryoga. Rate it and be harsh.
>>
File: 2026-05-09_08-00.png (411 KB, 1255x319)
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>>154580934
You get six picks tho.
>>
https://kachiclash.com/
>>
>>154581007
I forgot my password for this site 4 bashos ago
>>
>>154580987
I play kashi for the chance of a free authentic torikumi sheet
>>
File: Horse.png (1.27 MB, 1600x900)
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It's his time. I know it.
>>
This basho should be dream for Hoshoryu. The only person standing in his way is Kirishima really, and maybe Atamifuji
>>
With Dan being dead Shishi will rise like a big retarded phoenix
>>
>>154580372
its open for ura to win it all
>>
>>154581276
And Kusano.
>>
>>154581314
Never heard of him.
>>
>>154581320
He's the new Japanese hope now that Onosato will be forced to intai.
>>
>>154581276
I will never doubt Hosh's ability to choke. I'd even give it to Kotoshoho over him.
>>
>>154581276
He had the same dream last basho and he still lost. It's hopeless anon. Hosh is bound for at least one dumbass loss to a Maegashitter and according to reports he's getting whipped by Kirishima. That's at least two losses already this basho. He should be thankful Dan isn't gonna compete or else it's gonna be even worse.
>>
File: Yokozuna.png (526 KB, 873x614)
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I berieve in him.
>>
UPDATED
>>
>>154581565
Kakuryu over Chad? Fuck off.
>>
>>154581565
Isn't chicken-legs stuck in juryo forever?
>>
>>154581583
He's trending in the right direction, he's just not moving very fast.
>>
File: 1758875527092285.png (790 KB, 1133x917)
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>sitting out as a probation ozeki
I guess it's really a serious injury then, since at best you're gonna get your special sekiwake status next basho, but you're falling out of the rank regardless.
But I'm surprised he didn't dip halfway through last one. Once the rope dream was over, just leave. You tried salvaging the 8-7, failed and only fucked up the injury more
>>
>>154581733
This is a new (ankle) injury, Anon. It wouldn't really have mattered.
>>
>>154581749
How new? I thought that was something he got early in the last basho
>>
>>154581757
Three days ago.
>>
File: 琴櫻横綱土俵入り.jpg (104 KB, 1011x1200)
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>Grandson, it is time for you to make good on your vow!
>>
>>154582242
Damn, current Zak looks nothing like him except for the face. Who gave him the quad tits genes? Kotonowaka or Kotozakura?
>>
>>154582242
This guy didn't rope until he was in his 30s so Zak can sit comfy at ozeki for a while yet
>>
>>154582860
The face is from gramps, the body is from dad, the tits are from mom (I assume).
>>
File: (You).png (1.76 MB, 1193x747)
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>>261580

>Shurai, look! They are doubting me winning this basho.
>>
File: 1679295537972305.jpg (427 KB, 1988x1328)
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>be Kisenosato
>build stable in bumfuck nowhere Ibaraki (2 hours away from Tokyo)
>stable income depens on ONE (1) sekitori. Not like you have any other good rikishi.
>said sekitori has the injury that made you retire
>force him to continue to fight
>only now pull him out and MAYBE have him get surgery to MAYBE fix his issue.

What is his problem?
>>
>>154582931
are these his hokuto no ken kesho mawashi?
>>
File: 白熊.jpg (18 KB, 270x474)
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>>154582931
>ONE (1) sekitori
Fuck you too, Doitsu.
>>
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>>154582949
Yes
>>
>>154582981
holy...aura
>>
>Onosato out
>Dan is out AND demoted
I thought ozeki could sit out a tourney for injury?
>>
>>154583002
it still counts as a losing score so he has to get a winning score next basho or as is in case of dan because he had a losing score in march, it cements his demotion to sekiwake
>>
>>154582931
Kisenosato is one giant failure, just like his idol Raoh. Lmao
>>
>>154583002
He had a losing record last basho, if he gets a losing record again for not competing in this basho (which he will) then he gets demoted.
>>
>>154583026
>it cements his demotion
Unless he gets 10 wins in July, of course.
>>
>>154583002
No, he gets one basho where he can keep his record with a losing record. That was last basho. This one he NEEDED to post a winning record or be demoted to sekiwake. Next basho, he CAN return to Ozeki if he posts 10 wins.
>>
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>>154583030
don't talk shit about Raoh
>>
>>154583059
He was failure, admit it. No matter how cool and how much other characters and story wanked him , he was a failure.
>>
File: 1726986749671414.png (2.73 MB, 1920x1080)
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I miss him
>>
>>154581733
>>154581757
Happened in the past few days in stables training
>>
This tournament's bingo card!
https://bingobaker.com/#69feaa7d0c30678f
>>
>>154581007
I've got Horse, Tomato, Oho, Fujiseiun, and Grug. This is gonna be a tough one...
>>
File: 1752228242700942.jpg (1.08 MB, 4096x2731)
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He will win.
>>
>>154581605
>The Kotozakura of Juryo
>>
>>154581757
Day 4 of the last basho Churanoumi landed on his foot while his foot was on the tawara and fucked up one of Dan's toes. That's why he shat the bed. This ankle thing happened a few days ago while training at Arashio with the Wakas and Fuji. You can thank Wakamotoharu specifically.
>>
>>154583041
My aryan king can pull it off, I'm certain of it.
>>
File: 1760299602197809.png (16 KB, 1126x58)
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Only 3 modern Ozeki lost their rank immediately in their first 2-3 bashos (Theres also yokozuna Mienoumi but I don't know how to setup the query to count him in too for the screenshot) and they all bounced back. Dan will be fine.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0WH6lry1Yvs

Get some last sloppa in you before the basho.

>Booze
>Geisha
>Chanko

They truly have it all.
>>
File: datasumo.png (2.33 MB, 1920x1080)
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>>
File: cat-looks-inside-meme.png (119 KB, 498x337)
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>datasumo
>looks inside
>the entire channel is automated including speech
>>
>>154580033
This'll be my first basho!
The highest ranks are on at 9 AM for me. That's what we're all watching right? Or does kino happen at the lower ranks too?
>>
>>154580436
yeah where's the shit in the streets and the screeching blue-haired landwhales?
also no McSlop??? truly a nightmare...
>>
>>154587306
If you bother watching low rankers you're basically gonna spend hours waiting around for
>Koga
>Asahifuji
>Nabatame
>Wakanofuji
And as much as I'm going to enjoy Asahifuji bodying another seven useless fatsos I ain't waking up early for that.
>>
>>154587426
Thought so. Where can we watch live, btw?
>>
File: 1701976272021460.jpg (125 KB, 845x1041)
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>>154586803
>the Euro Truck Simulator mirror
>>
>>154587546
Check the links in OP
>>
>>154587546
Various restreamers on Youtube who are much easier to find if you can type in Japanese. There is also and may Allah forgive me for saying this but Midnightsumo on Twitch. He's fine as a starting point. After a while you tune out his 10 minute rants about the 2 minute old Russian account he just banned.
>>
File: dough yo erie.jpg (687 KB, 1840x1644)
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>>154587306
I watched a lot of lower division when I first got into sumo but now I only watch makuuchi

it's just so time-consuming and there's essentially nobody to talk to about it
>>
>>154587600
Is Onosato's injury a result of his awful dohyo-iri form? Would the evil spirits really go that far?
>>
>>154587628
>awful

I do not agree with this characterization. You're wrong.
>>
>>154587648
Having your feet together in the squat like that will make it much easier to bear the weight of your tsuna. Evil spirits don't take kindly to corner cutting.
>>
>>154580119
why does dan make people so butthurt?
he's ok, but hardly the goat or worst ever people make him out to be

>>154581303
my predictions in decreasing hopium
>ura zensho
>zakura yusho
>kirishima yusho
>takayasu double digit kk
>everything else

also i hope kotoshoho gets mk
not racist, just don't like em
>>
>>154587686
Because his fans are insufferable brown-nosing zealots
>>
>>154586803
>protection of shiganosuke
>>
File: ikazuchido nigger.jpg (120 KB, 1180x981)
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>>154587426
>spend hours waiting around for
>>
>>154587426
yeah, low rankers are not interesting except the meme sloppa boys and makushita joi but you can rewatch that on natto
>>
>>154587686
you think zak has a better chance than kiri?
>>
For the EU folks, the fights are 1 hour later in the summer right?
>>
>>154588700
Ask me again in 12 hours.
>>
>>154588700
Lower division starts in 4 to 4.5 hours from this post. Juryo starts around 6 hours after that. Makuuchi starts about 1 to 1.5 hours after that.
>>
Niggatame bros he has no match tonight we’ll have to wait till tomorrow for sumo to really start
>>
Reminder that the very first Ozumo match of the year was Asahifuji, and that by year's end he'll be a sekitori and possibly in Makuuchi.
>>
File: 1778208808850874.webm (3.51 MB, 1600x900)
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3.51 MB WEBM
>>154587648
>I do not agree with this characterization.
>>
>>154588983
Wow is that...is that a...stumble? Oh my science! I can't BELIEVE a guy STUMBLED ONE TIME
>>
>>154588983
The only thing this webm is missing is Kisenosato in the background wincing.
>>
>h-h-here's how hoshoryu can still win
>>
>>154588999
Science has no answer for his cursed soul.
>>
>>154589046
>November
JY, denied by Dan.
>September
JY, denied by Sato.
>May
JY, denied by Sato.

He'll win because there's no one left alive to contend, provided the gyojis actually bother calling mattas this time.
>>
Danfags...we lost...
>>
I think Hosh's biggest obstacle is himself. He has the capability to beat anyone on the dohyo but he tends to crack under pressure. I also feel he is a bit too relaxed and yet too tense at the same time.

If he could just channel the ferocity and warrior spirit of Uncle, he could be great.
>>
>>154589189
I love seeing Hosh pull off backwards knee drops, that shit smacks of Uncle. Also there was that time he threw WTK so hard he flipped him over onto his ass.
>>
Congratulations to the May 2026 Tournament winner Hoshoryu!
>>
>>154587686
It's pretty much entirely a reaction to the danfaggot, aonishiki himself has never said or done anything publicly to suggest he's arrogant or not taking sumo seriously.
>>
What if Takayasu wins
>>
>>154589240
Honestly this basho is him being thrown a softball. If he doesn't win this he's never getting his 3rd yusho. Like bro his greatest threats are Kirishima and Kotozakura (forma de Nov '24).
>>
>>154589364
He and kirishima are pretty close head to head albeit
>>
https://www.stablemasters.ca/

Just 2 hours left to get those fantasy picks in boys.
>>
>>154589357
Hosh vs Takayasu playoff
Book it
>>
they need ozempic
>>
>>154590263
>On his 10th try Takayasu finally wins a yusho
>Immediately intais
>Every geriatric holding onto a kabu is slobbing on his knob to hand it over to him
>Hakkaku retires early so that Takayasu can become nuHakkaku
>>
Damn, I just realised that last basho was the first time we had two 'zunas and two 'zekis in years, and now we don't get to do that again.
>>
>>154591337
Why are modern rikishi so fragile
This never happened with previous generations
>>
>>154591907
Previous generations were allowed to take a basho off if they were injured and preserve their rank, from 1972 to 2003. Modern rikishi also have godawful terrible weightlifting form because they're just looking at shitty YouTube videos instead of getting proper coaching, which is fucking them up. Traditional sumo exercises were intentionally developed to be relatively low impact specifically to prevent major injuries.
>>
>>154591907
Harumafuji reached Ozeki with a bench press of 80kg.
>>
>>154592000
Random lifting videos on Youtube are fine as far as form is concerned. If they aren't following them that just means the rikishi is a retarded dumbass.
>>
>>154587306
>does kino happen at the lower ranks
Damn right it does.
>>
>>154587319
>no McSlop
>>
>>154588206
He's putting on weight and fighting on his highest rank. I like his brand.
>>
>>154589404
Buy an ad
>>
>>154592324
They're fine if you're doing things casually and have time to take it easy if your muscles and joints start hurting, but if you're a professional athlete you need proper coaching or you will fuck yourself up. You get what you pay for.
>>
>>154592410
You can literally see the color of their cities and land from space. I wouldnt wish my worst enemy to live in mongolia
>>
>>154591907
Previous generations were match fixing and going easy on each other a lot more than today.
>>
Did that anon from /xs/ ever make that bingo board?
>>
Are you people allergic to ctrl+f?
>>
>>154593218
It wasnt that widespread
Certainly not enough to produce an effect like that
>>
File: lol lmao Takamisakari.png (379 KB, 680x938)
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>>154593218
>going easy on each other a lot more than today
>>
>>154593251
>>154584300
>>
>>154593275
AA--AAAA---AAACHOOO!!
>>
>>154593278
I guess today's rikishi are just magically more fragile for no reason then
>>
>>154593502
Its probably the fault of jews and women somehow
>>
Oho, please do something this basho.
>>
>>154593572
Oho will turn in an 8-7 record, you're welcome.
>>
>>154592483
>Ikazuchigger is putting on odor and wafting on his highest rank
"Rank" describes a smell that is strongly offensive, foul, or rancid. It often signifies disgusting odors associated with decay, corruption, or intense mustiness, such as "rank garbage" or "rank sweat". It is an adjective used to describe something profoundly gross or repulsive to the senses.
>>
>>154593275
iphonecancer is
>>
>>154593572
8 win streak and then he'll be hit by a bicycle and have to kyujo
>>
>>154593572
Oho is on too many Kachiclash picks, it's over.
>>
>>154581565
>Tio fuera de twitter
Sensible chuckle
>>
>No Moriura on the first day

why even live
>>
alri
here we are then
all the lads
>>
Ichiyamaphotobomber.
>>
Been watching the last couple years on boomer cable tv but for whatever reason I see xfinity parted ways with NHK World … shit ….. anyway something tells me it’s mitakeumis time
>>
>>154594359
... Are you some sort of time traveler? You know it's 2026, right?
>>
>Dan
Don't You Know
That You Are
A Shooting Star
>>
Is abema looking better or am I just coping?
>>
>>154594359
Anything thats not an intai will surprise me coming from Mitakeumi
>>
File: cross-eyed.png (104 KB, 212x213)
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>>154594440
I can't see a difference.
>>
>>154594440
I do notice as well.
>>
>>154594440
Whoever does the settings on their wide camera didn't fuck up today, it seems. It'll probably go back to the usual in a few hours.
>>
>>154594440
sharper to me too. Nice.
>>
5 hours left to get your kachi clash team picked.
>>
>>154587243
its an actual guy who sounds like a bot
>>
https://bashopicks.com/

Just found this site, looks new but pretty well made.
>>
>>154595079
Buy an ad
>>
>>154595180
Buy an ad
>>
>>154595943
https://4chan.org/advertise
>>
... what did they mean by this?
>>
>>154596183
I presume mother's day
>>
>>154596235
But I don't want him to be my mom.
>>
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>>154596265
TOO BAD.
>>
File: MY NAME IS.png (135 KB, 270x474)
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CAUSE THE JOBBERS, BARBARIANS AND THOSE WHO ARE HOSTILE TO THE HENKAS TO BE REDUCED TO DUST, LIKE DRY GRASS CONSUMED IN A FIERY BLAZE! SWIFTLY BRING ABOUT THEIR ERADICATION, THEIR ANNIHILATION, WE PRAY!
>>
>>154598059
HIS NAME... IS ABI
>>
File: Abi choke.jpg (457 KB, 1080x928)
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Go for the neck.
>>
>>154594722
high functioning autistics are the most unfairly discriminated against group on earth
>>
>>154598180
Cool it...
>>
>>154587686
idk, but my mom really likes him.
>>
File: finally.png (665 KB, 1103x657)
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its been so long since the last basho
but the wait is over
>>
We're about to see Kotoshoho's 2nd yusho
>>
who are we betting on today sumosisters?
>>
>>154598180
Unironically this.
>>154598853
Unironically this.
>>
>>154598994
Hoshoryu
>>
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>>154598994
Koto...zakura...
>>
ura yusho
>>
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>>154599556
>>
>>154582975
shirokuma is based
>>
>no Aonishiki
>no Onosato
Mickey Mouse basho
>>
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>>154599929
>>154599556
Zak's Yokozuna run starts tonight.
>>
>>154600368
dan sucks bro
>>
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>Wakamiyabi vs Omori
>>
>>154600786
fact check: false FUCK YOU
>>
>>154600786
>yusho twice in a row
>have one basho where he's injured and underperforms
>now the narrative is that he sucks
Makes no sense. I'm also a newfag and have only been following since November so I don't really understand why he's being demoted when Kotozakura has jobbed every basho I've watched so far and he gets to keep his rank.
>>
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Aw....
>>
Thoughts?
>>
>>154601091
Because Kotozakura hasn't had two losing records in a row. In fact, he's only had one make-koshi since making ozeki 2 years ago. That's not jobbing. He had double digits last basho for fuck's sake.
>>
>>154601118
Good size. We'll see.
>>
>>154601118
Call me when he makes makuuchi
>>
>>154601091
He's being demoted due to getting a losing record last basho and going kadoban as a result, which is basically a safeguard against instant demotion that Ozeki get, and is now guaranteed to demote to Sekiwake next basho due to sitting out.
Despite how much of a 'jobber' zak seems to be, the last losing record he's had was in january of 2025.
>>
>>154601091
retard
>>
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>>154601354
No need for that. He admitted he was a newfag.
>>
>>154601118
Future yokozuna
>>
>>154600368
The whaito piggu hit his ceiling, so did Kisenosato mk2
>>
>>154601410
sorry
>>
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>>154601091
Alright, since you're still somewhat new to the sport, some further explanations may be in order.
Zak is actually a very humble individual who keeps balance both for his record and for the basho in general so that everyone wins in the end. He saves up every win above KK so that once he hits 33, he can turn them in to the JSA in exchange for two 15-0 records that propel him to yokozunaship, upon reaching which he immediately retires, inherits the leadership of his stable and gets plastic surgery that cuts the number of his tits in half.
> source?
ethical, clean, ecologically conscious
>>
>>154602052
acktually zak would get implants as every pair of tetas powers him up. so once he becomes 'zuna he will have 6 tetas and become unstoppable...
>>
Welp, I thought the last basho started a week later than it actually did so I was playing catch-up basically the entire time. I won't be making that mistake again.
>>
>>154602292
Rumors say that Aoiyama purposefully retired from competition so Kotozakura wouldn't try to steal his combat mammaries
>>
Sekitori Enho has appeared
finally back in the oichonmage
>>
juryo has begun
>>
Enho with pink mawashi. GAY!
>>
Decisive manlet victory
>>
Yay Enho
>>
File: okaryubrain.png (257 KB, 546x365)
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Man he is pleasantly round
>>
Qrd on Enho? Why are people all hype about him?
>>
>>154604121
he is very smol
>>
Great save at the tawara to grab a win
Okaryu is /ourguy/
>>
>>154604121
Hakuho disciple, former top division guy, got hurt, dropped all the way to the bottom and has been climbing his way back for a while now trying to earn his elder stock. Also, he's smol.
>>
>>154604132
Not my guy. Nope.
>>
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>>154604121
cuz of dis
>>
>>154604139
Yes, your guy. Yes.
>>
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>>154604145
I think he looks gay.
>>
Always a shame when a fierce fight ends with a slip
>>
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638 KB PNG
>>154604160
There are no gay sumo wrestlers. It is a 100% heterosexual sport and that includes all fans.
>>
File: 1759815735238470.jpg (84 KB, 736x561)
84 KB JPG
>>154604121
It's the first time in history a second highest division champ gets demoted to the lowest division possible and manages to climb back to salaried ranks, and that's after breaking his neck. Ura and Terunofuji somewhat did the same thing, but they had to restart from the second lowest instead.
>>
>Hitoshi
>>
>>154604169
TIL I'm not gay :)
>>
>>154604198
That's right, anon. You were just abused as a child.
>>
>>154604218
Pedo
>>
>>154604237
Are you retarded or something
>>
Go back.
>>
>>154604179
What the hell was his problem?
>>
>>154604179
do you think the other sumo wrestlers held him down and raped him back at the stable for pulling a stunt like that?
>>
>>154604289
He wasn't looking and the Shinpan said something to him. lol
>>
Nishonoseki's ONE (1) sekitori just won.
>>
A victory for the non-existent sekitori
>>
Fuck yeah, shirokuma
>>
File: 17688403295218094.mp4 (1.49 MB, 480x480)
1.49 MB
1.49 MB MP4
We love Kumajiro
>>
>>154604392
is it possible to buy the yobidashi outfits anywhere? The top looks like a plain karate gi but the bottom is like hakama with the sides cut off, where would you even find that? I want to larp
>>
>>154604409
>is it possible to buy the yobidashi outfits anywhere?
Ryogoku, likely.
>>
KAZUMAAAAAA
KAZUMAAAAAA
>>
File: KAZUMA CLIMBS.png (1.3 MB, 1620x1080)
1.3 MB PNG
ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?
>>
what was that lol? hakkaku casted a curse to make his sole sekitori win?
>>
Good defense, Kyokukaiyu!
>>
Horse looks nervous
>>
>>154604545
Hakakku doesnt have anyone else left to bully
>>
>>154604545
It's because if he fumbles this easiest yusho of his life than he is actually the most dogshit yokozuna we've since the late 90s
>>
File: 1769330460422943.webm (2.9 MB, 1280x720)
2.9 MB
2.9 MB WEBM
>>
Thats what Takkers should always look like
>>
>>154604614
comin' to fuck your bitch type walk
>>
>>154604616
chicken-legs won't ever make it out of juryo.
>>
>>154604624
He already did and won a yusho while he was at it
>>
>>154604641
Fluke.
Won't ever happen again.
>>
>>154600368
filler basho, can't wait for the beach episode
>>
>our retard
>>
shishi was always the better ukrainian
>>
File: Triangle.jpg (159 KB, 960x836)
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>>154604660
Fact
>>
Kirishima looking good.
>>
Hakunofuji still getting a good cheer despite recent events
>>
YOISHOOOO!!!
>>
Hoshs dohyo iri has improved enormously from his initial efforts
Quite good now
>>
File: zak.png (63 KB, 283x407)
63 KB PNG
>>154600429
Kotozakura, the Wrench-Thrower
>>
Member when Ohnoshito fucked up his dohyoiri kek that was funny
>>
Damn, Dan doesn't get to see his portrait unveiled
>>
>>154604763
I never cared. Its not funny and your trolling is pitiful and stupid.
>>
>aonishiki gets portrait or some shit
>abema doesn't even show it
wow tell us how you really feel abema
>>
Ran away from the war, ran away from the rope...
>>
File: Hoshoryu.jpg (129 KB, 650x542)
129 KB JPG
LET'S GO!!!!!!!!
>>
>>154604783
They can't afford the camera angle.
>>
The portrait raising music is like something from a JRPG when you pick up a new item
>>
File: Day1_DRAMA.png (3.02 MB, 2042x1036)
3.02 MB PNG
>>
>>154604783
They might show it on NHK feeds, but the cheap fucks at Abema NEVER seem to do it...
>>
Is he getting a flower ready for his hostess?
>>
>>154604783
The feet on the portrait are too small to catch the interest of Abema's degenerate cameramen
>>
>>154604783
nhk showed it. nhk wins again
>>
>>154604833
alright share an nhk stream
>>
>>154604843
sent. check your dms
>>
>>154604843
VPN+ABEMA
>>
>>154604843
I have a pee stream for you
>unzips
>>
File: images.jpg (6 KB, 251x201)
6 KB JPG
154604847
>>
>>154604843
kick(.)com/s0desune
>>
>>154604833
NHK is pure garbage.
>>
>>154604862
delete your post. now.
>>
>>154604866
why?
>>
>>154604843
https://www.twitch.tv/midnightsumo
>>
>>154604872
The sumo cops are watching!!!!!!!!
>>
>>154604878
that guys a faaaagggggg
>>
File: 1758320292761692.gif (116 KB, 276x376)
116 KB GIF
>>154604878
>>
>>154604872
"they" monitor this thread...
>>
File: mfwryuden.jpg (34 KB, 713x666)
34 KB JPG
>>154604878
>>
>>154604872
Don't listen to the tards
>>
fuck ryuden all my homies hate ryuden
>>
Ok Fujiryoga winning on the belt even against someone like geriatric Ryuden is huge.
>>
>>154604899
>fuck ryuden all my homies hate ryuden
he had an affair and forced the chick he fucked that wasn't his wife to abort it, not exactly a likeable guy
>>
>>154604878
>midnightsumo

>"my boy!"
>plays music befor a bout

that guy is seriously a faggit
>>
You've never met Ryuden's wife. Don't rush to judgement.
>>
>>154604899
ryuden is based
>>
Monkey power
>>
>>154604921
if you marry a woman because you're too eager and she's a major fuckup it's not her fault because it's a woman's nature to be retarded. The fault is on the man for choosing a retarded woman to marry.
>>
>>154604911
He didn't "force" her to do anything, she did it herself.
>>
>>154604972
But anon, they're ALL retards.
>>
File: 1700178480604558.gif (1.07 MB, 423x360)
1.07 MB GIF
>>154604992
>>
>>154604899
>nooooo you cannot fuck your fans and force them to murder a baby!
>>>/r/eddit
>>
File: 1707027269077778.jpg (12 KB, 240x240)
12 KB JPG
>>154604972
But if all women's nature is to be retarded, how do you choose a not-retarded woman to marry?
>>
File: Be a man.jpg (238 KB, 720x720)
238 KB JPG
>>154604972
You sound like a woman then.
>>
File: BASED Tamawashi.png (633 KB, 960x540)
633 KB PNG
>needs 12 more wins to tie Aminishiki for 7th place in all time wins
>>
Greatest Sekiwake ever.
>>
>>154605004
You don't. You learn and apply tard wrangling skills.
>>
>>154605028
Hasn't been the same since his father died...
>>
File: 1778072462745919.jpg (109 KB, 993x892)
109 KB JPG
>>154604911
>implying women need to be forced to get abortions
Its just a fun hobby for them
Get a load blown inside
Get an abortion
Rinse and repeat
>>
>>154605060
You say that like it's a bad thing.
>>
>>154605036
this poster knows.
>>
>>154605060
Yeah?
>>
koto fucking a hole
>>
Good match
>>
I believe in the Eihou, sanyaku soon
>>
my retard
>>
webm anon?
>>
>>154605088
he got bullied last basho and committed seppuku...
>>
>>154605088
he got bullied by the "buy an ad" retard and left us...
>>
File: KotoNERDho.jpg (76 KB, 720x405)
76 KB JPG
Good start.
>>
>>154605060
>can't go anywhere in the white western world without hearing the ghostly cries of some murdered child screaming from the womb of so many graveyard pussy having bitches
>>
And I am reminded yet again why I stopped posting here
Everything is more enjoyable without you cunts
>>
>>154605106
cry more fag
>>
>>154605102
Sounds like a you problem.
>>
>>154605106
No one's keeping you here, faggot.
>>
tomatozan
>>
goddammit shishi
>>
File: shishi3.jpg (1.08 MB, 1080x1474)
1.08 MB JPG
>SAY!
>MY!
>NAME!
>>
why is kinbozos face all red? is he abusing asthma inhalers?
>>
More like Yoshishi-Hashi
>>
>>154605106
Ok, dont let the door hit you on the ass on the way out
>>
>>154605120
MARVEL!
>>
>>154605066
It is a bad thing since they could have used:
1. IUD
2. Diaphragm
3. Condom
4. Abstinence
5. Rhythm method
6. Birth control pills
But no. We live in a society of murdering whores.
>>
>>154605112
>a ghostly infant cries off in the distance
>>
>>154605106
yeah, you're better off elsewhere.
>>
>>154605130
go outside
>>
>>154605130
Go blow Jesus somewhere else, retard.
>>
>>154605140
Take your meds, that was a bird.
>>
File: 2873lklj.jpg (118 KB, 1208x630)
118 KB JPG
>>154605106
>>
>>154605106
Maybe reddit is more your speed?
>>
Alcies out
>>
Ura STRONG
>>
Beast of Reiw-ACK
>>
>>154605148
Sure, Lucifer. Sure.
>>
I've seen enough. Ura yusho.
>>
File: Urabeam.gif (35 KB, 1008x800)
35 KB GIF
>>
>>154605148
>Jesus
wut
>>
File: Ura the boss 4.webm (1.43 MB, 1349x729)
1.43 MB
1.43 MB WEBM
>just straight blasted him out
Very nice.
>>
>>154605168
Hail, Satan!
>>
File: hakuoho.png (207 KB, 438x482)
207 KB PNG
10000th Maegashira 10 Ochiahonofuji

>The Beast of Reiwa Era
>the Women Abuser
>the Predator
>Terunofuji Bane
>Mongolian Joker
>The Mummy
>Glass Shoulder

>DONT!
>SAY!
>HIS!
>NAME!
>>
>>154605170
This. They should just give it to him now to avoid his opponents getting injured.
>>
>>154605186
lmao
>>
>>
>american flag complaining about what other people do with their bodies
every single time faggot shut the fuck up and stop shitting up the thread
>>
>>154605205
you are just as guilty but too stupid to see it
>>
>>154605205
>could have a sense of humor and just shitpost
>has to cry like a bitch instead
Many such cases.
>>
>>154605221
Sir, this is a sumo thread.
>>
>>154605228
look another retard. dont (you) off topics and they wont keep posting. simple stuff here guys
>>
Asanoyama seemed a bit angry there...
>>
>>154605186
> WOMEN BEWARE, YOU'RE IN FOR A SCARE
>>
>>154605221
>>>/pol/
>>
>>154605242
see>>154605237
>>
Evil spirit bros. We FEAST this basho.
>>
My name is Abi!
>>
>>154605247
>>>/mlp/
>>
>>154605261
thanks for your concession
>>
>>154605264
What do you think you're doing right now?
>>
>>154605271
he's winning the argument because your dumb ass keeps replying, who do you want to win the next match fagola?
>>
>>154605271
pretty obvious, no?
>>
MOTHERFUCKER
>>
FUCK THIS ASAKORYU TACHIAI SPIFFY WAS RIGHT
>>
TRIPPLE MATTA
>>
someone teach this manlet to calm down
>>
Eager manlet!
>>
>>154605283
>He's winning because he keeps getting me to keep posting by also posting himself.
That makes sense.
The horse. ... but he lost
>>
Fuck Oshoma
>>
>>154605293
Haven't seen one of those in a year, I think!
>>
>>154605289
Not really.
>>
UMMMMM HIS LEFT HAND WASNT DOWN!
>>
>>154605307
It never is. Deal with it.
>>
>matta tri-fecta
A bit much.
>>
>>154605306
I know and that's because you are really, really stupid
>>
>>154605313
And yet you persist.
>>
imagine if murray was commentating that bout kek he'd be seething
>>
>so you don't have to worry, worry...
>>
>>154605314
at calling you stupid? yes. no more (you)s for dumdum
>>
File: reddragon.png (374 KB, 853x362)
374 KB PNG
>I am the Great Red Manlet and you tachicucked me 3 times...
>>
>>154605319
>no more (you)
NOW you're getting the idea.
>>
>>154580881
RIP ig
>>
>>154605326
>Do you see?
>>
What’s a good alternative to Sumodb?
>>
>>154605326
DO YOU SEE?
>>
>>154605335
There isn't one. You just have to suffer through it.
>>
>>154605317
so if they pronounce "mirai for earth" as earsu and the company calls itself "mirarsu" why is it turned into th? It's like how they changed the localized "aeris" into "aerith" it sounds fucking retarded or like the reader has a hare lip, why not just end it with "su"?
>>
>>154605335
If you just want to follow today's torikumi, the JSA website will do.
>>
Chiyoshoma has a "I get rimmed by lolis" phenotype
>>
File: AMERICA.png (139 KB, 230x368)
139 KB PNG
>>
>>154605317
LIFE IS A TREASURE
>>
File: reddragon2.jpg (21 KB, 480x270)
21 KB JPG
>>154605333
>>154605340
>Do you see? Do you see my fucking hand touching the ground?
>Yes, oh yes i see...
>>
>>154605335
https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoMain/torikumi/1/1/
for following along w/ live results (it's actually slightly faster than sumodb)
no alternative for sumodb's query system and shiz though
>>
>>154605346
Probably because gaijin would overpronounce it as "soo" when really you're just touching the "s".
>>
>>154605328
That was clearly his point from the start. That anon is right about you being stupid.
>>
>>154605335
sumostats.com is a new one
>>
>>154605346
No clue. Language spelling is fucky like that...
>>
>>154605373
then end it with "S"? it's not 1945, people speak both languages, why is this so fucking hard today? I'm not picking on you I'm just like, screaming into the void, it's so fucking dumb
>>
>>154605379
I know it was his point. My point is you don't put out a fire with more fire.
>>
>>154605359
I thought foreign entities could not sponsor the bouts
>>
>>154605359
Disgusting. Mutts will have them singing their national anthem for them before long if they are already making them display US banners.
>>
>>154605359
das rite we run this shit
>>
>>154605386
I don't see the issue. They just pronounce it odd because of their manner of speech. It's not like they would correct you for saying Mirarth.
>>
>grab Shodai balls at tachiai
>destroy his left ball
>push
>win
>"Nothing personnel, Ozekiddo..."
>>
File: hakuho tachiai matta.png (2.27 MB, 2011x1122)
2.27 MB PNG
>>154605291
>>154605293
>>154605307
>muh heckin matta
>this is breaking the sport!
skill issue
>>
>>154605395
As far as I know it's just individuals who can't sponsor fights. I guess they consider the "America 250" thing a company of sorts?
>>
>>154605335
I'm watching LeoDickinsonSumo on youtube, I found out about these guys literally this morning and they're great. I started my search after 5 minutes of MidnightSumo, couldnt stand the ads and the constant "thank you faggot69 for the sub".
>>
>press w
>win
>>
>>154605429
Its from the US Embassy, so it makes sense.
>>
>>154605440
avoidingthehenka on kick
>>
>>154605335
https://sumostats.com/
>>
>>154605440
VPN + ABEMA
>>
>>154605440
I think Kongo or whatever his name is is too much but when it's just Leo it's my favorite.
>>
>>154605440
Leo is fine, but he does have an annoying voice.
I'm switching between him and ATH as the mood strikes.
>>
File: .,.,.gif (596 KB, 244x200)
596 KB GIF
>>154605361
Not gonna lie, but that one just doesn't work for me, brother.
>>
>>154605444
*distant Onosato sighing*
>>
File: 金剛.jpg (56 KB, 497x600)
56 KB JPG
>>154605460
>Kongo or whatever his name is
>>
BULL
>>
>>154605454
>>154605459
but I want english commentary
>>
File: 1256276.png (1.07 MB, 1342x664)
1.07 MB PNG
>>
>>154605475
...pic unrelated?
>>
>>154605490
I think NHK is the only lot that uses Engrish speakers.
>>
>Oho
>No shit colored belt
>I feel hope
>loses
It's my fault that I had hope.
>>
File: sumofans.mp4 (3.81 MB, 700x624)
3.81 MB
3.81 MB MP4
>>154605490
NMGI
>>
>>154605496
Pic is Kongō in 1975.
>>
The Henka Brothers
>>
>>154605490
>but I want english commentary
on the last day NHK world does the last half of the top leagues in english or you can use sodesune on kick as posted earlier, but it really doesn't add anything.
>>
That wasnt even a Henka, Hiradog charged too hard
>>
>>154605500
ohno
>>
>>154605361
This line popped up in my head as WTK henka'd. It was hilarious.
>>
>Press W
>Lost
>>
File: Waka waka waka.jpg (9 KB, 259x194)
9 KB JPG
>>154605510
Wakawakawaka!
>>
>>154605497
>>154605511
but I want it live
>>
>Yoshinofuji (forma de proper haircut)
>>
>>154605522
the kick stream and NHK on the final day are both live. I don't know what else you're asking for.
>>
>>154605505
And the guy whoe comes on Leo's stream sometimes is not him, is some other guy whos name sounds similar.
>>
>four-eyed army behind Kirishima
>>
YOSHINOFUJI WITH AN OICHO
>>
>>154605534
Of course not, he died in 2014. But know you know about Kongō.
>>
>>154605522
Nah, just go with Abema and pick up on the myriad of "so desu ne", "so desu ka", and "tachiai desu"...
>>
DAMN.... that was close.
>>
that was clear as day are these shimpan retarded?
>>
>>154605547
They all have different angles THOUGH
>>
>>154605547
oh im retarded i thought gunbai was to kusano
>>
>>154605547
lol, you are.
>>
this is racism against fishlippers
>>
Did Kotoshoho flip off Yoshinofuji? LMAO
>>
Dead body rule only applies to Onosato's opponents and Dan.
>>
why is this kotoshoho sekiwake?
>>
>>154605565
and you. You are dead body.
>>
File: Former Kisenosato.jpg (151 KB, 691x881)
151 KB JPG
>senile gyoji knew who won but forgot which side he was on in the dohyo
>>
>>154605532
nah imma stick with Leo, these guys are live, in English, and dont have ads or donations
>>
>>154605568
Because Wakatakakage didn't finish the basho.
>>
>>154605568
He had a good basho in March.
>>
>>154605571
>, in English
You will change; we all start off on English streams. Abema and VPN is the way to go
>>
Atamin...
>>
File: datasumo.png (696 KB, 1272x704)
696 KB PNG
>>154605490
> But there's way too much information to decode the action. You get used to it. I… I don't even see the overlay. All I see is debuts, tribulations, hopes crushed.
>>
CURSED
>>
>>154605578
You learned jap?
>>
Please let this be Ichiyamamoto's basho. Just give him ONE
>>
>>154605580
kek good one. datasumo still sucks though
>>
Man don't start off like this....
>>
>Ichy Yamamotod that ass...
>>
>>154605585
I genuinely do not understand the datasumo hate, the fucker isn't AI though.
>>
>>154605583
>You learned jap?
Some of it, yes. You'll pick up on the sumo terms, and the rest doesn't really matter.
>>
>>154605583
it's not hard to learn the basic terms and listen for them. Further, in a lot of the japanese on screen stuff they use what's called "furigana" for kanji which is where they show the hiragana pronunciations of the names next to the kanji names so you can read who's up next. Hiragana and katakana take only a couple weeks at most to learn, it's like the alphabet but each character is a syllable instead.
>>
Oh, a cutie in the front row. White, cropped t-shirt. Could see some belly. Nice. You could see her as Ichiyamamoto was getting ready to leave
>>
>>154605580
KEK
>>
>>154605583
... hai. Arigato desu. Sumo wa tanoshii desu. Sou desu ne? Desu.
>>
Atamin calming down my delusions that this is his yusho early
>>
File: wife.jpg (20 KB, 420x605)
20 KB JPG
>>154605599
I've found my wife. Now I just need to check how retarded she is.
>>
And as we watch Hosh walk in, you can hear the clown music getting louder in the background....
>>
>>154605612
Why? Is Aonishiki back there?
>>
good and quick fight
>>
KiriSHITma back to back yusho. Calling it now. Yokozuna this year when OnoSHITo retires from his injury.
>>
>>154605609
He will force a playoff with ura and lose. I have seen it
>>
how to filter blank-SHIT-blank?
>>
Kirishima keeps winning with these high wire acts.
>>
>>154605619
Would be a great comeback story for him.
>>
File: kekshima2.png (2 MB, 1920x1080)
2 MB PNG
77th Yokozuna Kirishima

>the last Mongolian Yokozuna
>Harumafuji reincarnated
>the Fat Reaper
>the Counter-Nephew

>SAY!
>HIS!
>NAME!
>>
>>154605626
/shit/i should do it...
>>
File: 12647385.png (525 KB, 559x1117)
525 KB PNG
>>
>>154605610
It's always fun to look for cuties in the background during bashos. They are fleeting respites amongst the morbid obesity and homoeroticism
>>
File: ....png (921 KB, 500x974)
921 KB PNG
...

> ...
> ...
> ...
> *tumbleweed rolling*
> ...
> ...
> ...

> *crickets*
> ...
> ...
>>
File: hitmanmonkey.jpg (45 KB, 522x566)
45 KB JPG
<3 Zak
>>
File: HEYneBSaIAAnHFo.jpg (280 KB, 1536x2048)
280 KB JPG
>>154605626
just stop caring, some people don't like the same guys I like either.
>>
>Z-ACK!
>>
who's that in the hallway looking at kotozakura?
>>
>>154605626
>>154605639
i got an ai to spit me this out
/\b\w*SHIT\w*\b/
it doesnt filter regular words like bullshit
>>
get rekt, fattie
>>
>>
>>154605659
Your mom.
>>
KINOOO
>>
FujinobashoforKotozakura
>>
MANLET FOR THE FUCKING WIN
>>
File: 1761999341065976.png (298 KB, 300x666)
298 KB PNG
> BLASTOFF CONFIRMED. REACHING OUTER ATMOSPHERE...
>>
How is this guy still ozeki?
>>
Kotozakura needs to grow a third pair of tits in order to level up.
>>
That motherfucker was angry. Acted like Zak owed him money.
>>
Dont fuck up horse
>>
>>154605626
what is this anon talking about
>>
>>154605656
It's not even about liking a guy, he just does it to everybody and brings nothing to the discussion
>>
File: Takayasu london.webm (3.5 MB, 1280x716)
3.5 MB
3.5 MB WEBM
>>
>>154605678
He wins more often than he loses.
>>
>first match against Takayasu
Uh-oh
>>
get ready for le epic heckin' staredown!
>>
God please henka it'd be so funny
>>
Be sure to get your "Hosh lost" pics and shitposts ready folks.
>>
>>154605686
Don't worry about it, newfriend.
>>
>>154605691
He's won the last 5. We'll see.
>>
Hoshoryu isn't going to lose this. He's beaten Takayasu 5 times in a row.
>>
>>154605700
but it's not a kinboshi, what's the point? takayasu is an honorable foe
>>
>believing in Takayasu
Nope. That way leads to the path of sadness.
>>
>>154605686
people putting SHIT in the middle of names
>>154604763
>>154605619
>>154604763
>>
The fuck was that a Jeet in the audience
?
>>
SHUUU SHUUU SHUUU
>>
>>154605694
Lol
>>
getting spicy
>>
Abema editors came prepared for that.
>>
Goku vs Vegeta (overweight)
>>
>>154605721
looked like someordinaryjeet
>>
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
>>
It was a good basho, see you guys in july
>>
based showmen

BEAR-SAN
>>
>Kirishima and his gaggle of clowns
>>
PAPAAAAAAAAAAAA
he killed him omg
>>
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>>154605700
>>154605707
>>154605711
>AAAAAAAAIIIIIEEEEEEEEE!!!!
>>
really? Evil spirits win
>>
That looked fucking painful. Honorable foe my ass.
>>
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1.72 MB PNG
>>
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P A P A
>>
Papa Inuyasha'd his ass
>>
>>154605705
>>154605707
Hoh hoh
>>
He seriously ack-ed on day ONE!!???
>>
File: Horse.webm (3.46 MB, 396x720)
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of fucking course
>>
>oh shit i lost this bout in my layup basho
>uuuuuuuuuh AAAAIIIEIEEEE MY HAMSTRING!
kek embarrassing
>>
clown basho
>>
they let anyone in these days..
>>
>that lone zabuton flying
>>
Man we're in cursed era right now
>>
UP
DOWN
TOUCH THE GROUND
>>
A short but thick match.
Was the guy who touched the ground with his hand a yokozuna?
>>
That looked like a groin maybe? Fuck...
>>
Dude can't walk properly, it's fucking over..
>>
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he can't even walk
>>
Takayasu yusho. It's going to happen.
>>
>wheelchaired
ITS OVER
>>
BELIVERS!!!

Where ARE YOU???
>>
>onosato refuses surgery
>dan's foot exploded
>hosh has owies in leg
sumo is dead
>>
Hamstring status: pulled
>>
Takayasu got off early in the tachiai didn't he?
>>
did he died
>>
>>154605758
Not just a Yokozuna, the greatest Yokozuna in modern history
>>
>>154605764
Someone post the clip of horse getting pulled out by wheel chair pls
>>
>Takayasu legendary zensho yusho is real

BROS?!?!
>>
>>154605770
Yeah they should rematch.
>>
>>154605770
Yeah, he must have watched Spiffy's video. He emulated Fujinokawa perfectly.
>>
>>154605765
No! STOP IT! STOP IT RIGHT NOW!
>>
>so anyways I pulled him down and he never got back up!
>>
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On the bright side, there won't be any kinboshi printed this basho....
>>
In for some real clown shit if Kiri doesn't just run away with it
>>
>>154605760
It's either groin or hammy. Either way dude is fucked. He'll probably try to fight tomorrow though due to him being the lone Zuna plus the pressure on him to win a Zuna basho. So congrats to Fujinokawa on another kinboshi
>>
>>154605775
Well shit, looks like he pulled his groin
>>
>>154605793
you misspelled Ura
>>
God imagine Hakkaku's face right now.
>>
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>>154605779
>>
>>154605803
>>
Call up Danhausen to perform the Yokozuno rituals.
>>
>TOTAL
>ZUNA
>DESTRUCTION

Damn. We went from "...we might have 3 yokozuna this year" to having ZERO yokozuna in the manner of a couple basho.
>>
Arent there like a billion wrestlers injured for this basho? Seems like the perfect chance for underdogs to shine
>>
>>154605803
>Terunofuji... we need you, come back to Yokozuna rank for another 5 years
>I swear this is the last time
>>
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Fucking wasteland basho.
>>
>>154605820
Just three in the top division, afaik
>>
>>154605820
Top 3 are proper fucked.
>>
>>154605803
>>
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>>154605803
>>
So he looked fucked when his right leg straightened (I think his hand was down at that point) and then Takayasu pushed him straight down on the shoulders to double fuck him. Also, what leg was the leg that was injured before the Jan basho? The one with the torn meniscus? Was it his right one?
>>
>>154605829
Well... 3 out of the top 4.
>>
>>154605820
Yoshinofuji yusho
>>
>>154605816
It'd be kinda funny if Kirishima ended up being the only healthy yokozuna, after everyone wrote him off for being the first of the """new gen""" to lose ozeki.
>>
>>154605821
>Actually about that Hakunofuji incident, we've changed your punishment...
>>
>>154605833
No, that was the left leg.
>>
Future thread:

>>154605838

>>154605838

>>154605838
>>
>>154592410
>>154592672
that looks EXACTLY like a view of los angeles



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