Become Ungovernable Edition>Banzuke:http://sumodb.sumogames.de/Banzuke.aspxhttps://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoBanzuke/index/>Fight Schedule & Results:https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoMain/torikumi/1/1/>Some sumo links and how to watch live:https://rentry.org/uwbgc88dPreviously on /sumo/: >>157078452
BONUS SUMO
https://www.twitch.tv/midnightsumowe're watching here
KINO KINO KINO KINO
waow more sumo
To be fair, I think atomi stepped out sooner, but more sumo is great. It was a great round
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j0tSOSmnnwAwe're watching here
>>157088764thanks king, good vibes in that chat
> alright, let me do it again
Bonus sumo FTW.Pic not related.
Shame.
BACK TO THE SEA
fat man walk forward
>>157088768He did but the other was inevitably going down and that's also supposed to be a win? Weird sport.
Kotoeiho is good, but he's no shishi
it's kotoeihover...
literally just fat guy advantage. fat rikishi are so lame.
Fucking lard barrels just holding W
The Atamin Ozeki run is real
gassed against a human tomato, you're not winning
Atami ozeki run continues its move forward!
Back to back losses for Fishlips Jnr
Time for the heel match
Please let this hype up the older Tebakari.
PULL HIS FUCKING HAIR
>I miss him so much!
>>157088715thanks for saving us from yet another danfag-made thread.
>>157088804anyone got that webm of him laughing with money?
>>157088804Finally, a non-fraudzeki...
>>157088820I never cared for his brand.
>>157088820Don't worry we have Daiki Nakamura at home.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=04aZ3zbSR98
>>157088823
...
Ao seems very healthy this basho.
>>157088837>getting ready to hansoku your girl
goodjob fishlips
GET FUCKED
damn, handledlooking very ginger getting back into the ring
jej
It's joever
SHISHI YUSHO CONFIRMED
>>157088840thanks
SHISHIYUSHOOO
>>157088812
LMAO
SAYHISNA-ACK
this is good for shishi
Dan intentionally threw that bout out of shame over the events of yesterday
it's so danover...
>>157088848YOU FUCKED IT
#ConscriptAonishiki
They need him to be injured.
>>157088848Nope. That nigger's broken.
That's what he gets for being a dirty cheater. Hopefully he learned his lesson.
>dont let the white devil grab your belt>winIs it that simple?
THE 11-4 MARCHES ON
He's limping againAlso that was the worst Aonishiki bout I've ever seen, he looked injured from the get go
Reminder that it was a day 15 win over Dan that sealed Kotoshoho's yusho.
>Defend the belt>WinKotoshoho cracked the code
>>157088891>camera on him the entire walk back>doesn't limp at all >GUYS HE'S LIMPING
>>157088879>teleports behind you>"heh, nothing personnel... it's only sumo"
>>157088891He always limps when he lands on the ground like that, he will be fine. I think he just got beat today. Fishlips did a great job at the side step at the right time.
>>157088900He clearly was
>>157088877My bad....
>hair pull by kotoshoho>they don't call itthey hate him now
>>157088900He's been limping in and out of the arena every day for the past 3 days.
Karma for yesterday
>>157088875I think this may be the case. Dan really is the most honorable rikishi that ever lived. Truly awe-inspiring.
Into the trench he goes
> The white man... has no place in sumo.
>>157088918Dan shat in front of my door today, thank you for this great gift AONISHIKI!!
>>157088907>>157088916Unironically blind
28th meeting between Hoshoryu and Kotozakura.
In the kingdom of the fat tittied men, the four-tittied man is king
>>157088938His ankle has been mega taped up for a reason, and then he had his toenail ripped back, shit sucks man.
AAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!
jesus christ
KWABALAB WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT
>>157088938Wrong and stupid.
Oh dear...
Just fucking end it at this point, both zunas bring absolute shame to sumo
Thats my Yokozuna-Sekiwake :)
BWAHAHAHAHA
best yokozuna duo ever
just retire already jesus
Are you fucking kidding me, get this horse out of here.
>>157088956Rewind and post the webm I'll wait.
Make-koshi YOKOZUNA is real
So yokozunas are supposed to be bad?
>mfw Yokozuna Hoshoryu MK
The evil spirits won
I know it's never happened before but could Hosh request a demotion to Ozeki?
>both yokos at 5 lossesJesus christ...
glue factory incoming
i never liked this semen slurping sport anyway
> kotozakura nudges rikishi with his left hand> they immediately fall to the groundCOSMIC LAW MOTHERFUCKERS, 12 MORE YEARS OF 8-7ZEKI
>>157088980Onosato: hold my beer
>>157088970Doubling down on stupid I see. Good for you
God let Kiri win this one it would be the funniest shit ever, we're yet to see a double zuna loss on the same night I think
Well.......bye.
hoshoryu helping kotozakura avoid kadobantruly honorabu
shishi and dan would be better as yokozuna and no i'm not kidding
bad sign when kotozakura beats you by being more nimble
Does anyone remember the name of the manlet in makuuchi who used to throw as much salt as he possibly can?
Kirishima is winning this via the means of Onosato being a retard
>>157088979There's no way back from yokozuna, only retirement.Very similar to Yakuza..
Onosato should remember that pain is just in your head, it can't hurt you
I legit don't want anything more from this basho than Zak getting demoted.Except maybe a Shishi yusho...
>>157088991
>>157088988At this rate Zak is going to go KK while both zunas go MK.
What if Dan pulls kirishimas hair from ringside during this bout
i hate this shit man
>>157089005Make hosh cut his pinkie off then.
>>157089007>Zunas don't yusho>Zak remains Ozeki for at least another 4 months>A Maegashira gets the yushoChrist.
Kotonowaka will forever be >my ozeki. I pray that he 8-7s for many years to come, dropping matches to joi maegashira and beating the shit out of zunas.
>>157089007>he really thinks zak won't kkOh no no no no no no
>>157088994I've imagined a broken ankle he's on one leg!!
>>157088995Day 9 was the most recent. Get your shit together, Poland.
>>157089002Big salt, big loss.
Hakkaku after this basho
>>157089028
CMON KIRISHITMA SURELY YOU DON'T CHOKE THIS
>>157089002Terutsuyoshi. Better times
>>157089028This except double zuna MK and Shishi yuusho
Onosato i need you to win this one bud
oh my fucking god
WORST YOKO DUO EVER
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
>>157089069Thanks I miss that era as well
Onosato on his way to his first legit kachikoshi.
The horror... the horror!
LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
holy shit
Booooooooooooooooooo!
I put Onosato at a 18% chance to retire if Kirishima wins this basho.
Cursed Kirishima yusho incoming
Should've made takakeisho a yokozunathis wouldn't have happened
>>157089002Terutsuyoshi
Onosato now kyujos and Zak gets a fusen 8th win
TYD
Coulda-shoulda-woulda called that a matta too
76
these are your tournament leaderssay something nice about them!
>Onosato in 30 years
Shishi Yusho
Kisenosato contemplating murder-suicide right now
thoughts on Aonishiki vs Shishi?
>>157089112i hate himhe doesn't deserve whats being handed to him
>>157089113Pretty much goes in ascending order of clownery, too
Don't know lads, I feel like Kirishima went in just slightly Onosato put his tight arm down to touch
>>1570891133/4 are previous cup winners.2/4 are multiple cup winners.1/4 is Shishi.
>>157089124mongolians are famous for that in the sumo world.
>>157089113Takerufuji looks like his face is dirty.
>Gifted a Yusho because all the contenders were out>Now about to be gifted another and Yokozuna promotionOur hopes lie on Shishi, god help us all.
2 sanyaku, a former yusho winner and a caveman. Could be worse
>>157089124He did go a little early, but so did Shishi. Its not always perfect.
>>157089113It's not a clown basho, but it's a very clown-shaped one, where sekiwake and ozeki are still poised to win. It'll only be a clown basho if Shishi wins or a satanic 11-4 yusho is achieved.
I want shishi to win for the humor of it so badly that there are certainly spirits conspiring against my wishes
>>157089105he needs 10>>157089117kek'd
>>157089146Say it with me: TA KA YA SU YU SHO
>>157089141Didn't even win the yusho, he lost to the guy that heemed himself.
>>157089162You just need to KK in order to get rid of your kadoban status. 10 wins is for when you're trying to get repromoted in your first tournament after being demoted.
Sleep well. Work well 4chin /sumo/ brothers. May the Gods bless you to live and view the morrow's round.
personally i don't think kirishima is yoko material but seeing the state of yokozunas right now...
This isn't even Clown Basho anymore—we are in the territory of an Evil Basho. Evil spirits have completely taken over the dohyo; the Yokozuna can't keep them at bay.>both Yokozuna without a kachikoshi by the end of the damn Day 12>Kotozakura abusing the Ozeki system by finishing 8-7 in EVERY basho>Shishi could win the Emperor's Cup (and he doesn't even speak Japanese)>Aonishiki could win it too, even on one leg>Takerufuji farming wins against low-ranked maegashira AGAINDark forces have seized control of sumo; we must pray there isn't a bombing, a systematic wave of injuries, deaths on the dohyo, or—heaven forbid—a woman stepping onto the dohyo...
damn aonishiki got the black slapped off of him why does he have a black person’s shoulder anyway
>>157089179Ten wins seems odd honestly. You needed 11 on average to promote, so seems like you should need 11 to repromote
>>157089179I'd set it to 10 for zak specifically, he will do 8-7 and 7-8s forever.
>>157089197Fallen angel with one wing
>>157089212Only if they make it so that the zunas have to commit hara-kiri if they don't KK this tournament.
>mfw waiting for the torikumi to drop
>>157089197its a reminder that while ukrainians may look white, they aren't really.or something .
>>157089194So what happens if Shishi wins? No interview? Traslator-kun assists? Poorly sung karaoke?
>>157089236If Shishi were any whiter, he'd be albino
Let's just make Hosh and Onosato retire and get Kirishima and Dan in there.
Is there a schedule for tomorrow yet?
>>157089235>mfw writing the torikumi
>>157089260Are yokozunas meant to retire at 27?
>>157089268Would you prefer these two keep looking like cunts for the next 5 years?
>>157089279This is my first basho I don't know what anything is really supposed to look like
>>157089235shishi vs papayasu maybe? or fujiryoga
>>157089291NTA, but it's my 21st and I still learn something every time.
>>157089311my new knowledge for this basho: they build a drainage canal into the dohyo for the rikishi to spit water into and channels it underground
>>157089311I saw a few bouts last basho with Wakatakakage which was dipping my toes in but I didn't really follow it properly or see the ending or know anything at all about the divisions or how stuff works. There is a bit of a difficulty curve learning to watch sumo with all the new lingo and rules and everything but I think I have a decent enough handle on things and as a result this basho I have been LOCKED IN since day 1.
>>157089002
>>157089329we need him back for this bashothe evil spirits...
>>157089329
>>157089241a helicopter lands in front of the arena.the door opens, Zelensky gets out, takes all the prize money envelopes, then grabs half the bento boxes from the staff catering table and one of the salt baskets from the dohyo, then gets back in his helicopter and flies away. the shimpan pretend they didn’t see anything.
>>157089329did the officials hate him for this, it seems like boomerseethe tech
>>157089113Somehow, Takerufuji has returned...
>>157089113BREAK HIS LEGS
>>157089374They were pretty salty.
>>157089194>Kotozakura abusing the Ozeki system by finishing 8-7 in EVERY bashoThis isnt as rare as you think, go look at Kaio. The rules for Ozeki are like that for a reason.
>>157089401Chiyotaikai too.
>>157089329Oshioyama-sama, kawaii ne
>>157089401Kaio did it at the end of his career basically, when he was 36 or so. Zak is only 28.
>>157089506My prediction for next day winnersZakDanSideburnsBigEye-kun
>>157089506Takkers v Sato huh? It's been too long.
>>157089506Big chance that Onosato pulls out, right?
is there female sumo? asking or a friend
>>157089705he doesn't seem like he's getting more hurt, he's just fighting scared
>>157089506>Shishi vs Kotozakura>Tits vs Thighs>Day vs Night>The Lion of Ukraine vs The Hippo of Chiba>T-Rex vs Stegosaurus>Maegashira 1000000 vs Ozeki 1 WestIf Kotozakura lose this match... they need to retire him...
>>157089736Of course. >>>/xs/263707
Hosh and Sato are in a really awkward spot right now. They're doing pathetic but pulling out could decide the entire yusho race.
>yokozuna>7-5>6-6This is fucking rough
Kotoshoho pulled Dan’s hair! Fucking cheater!!
>>157089845lmao he really did, this is an OUTRAGE
Retards. THIS is a hair pull that was NOT overturned even by monoii. STFU about a pat on the head.
>>157089845>>157089926#Justice4Dan
>>157089845It's more of "if you do this shit, we will do this shit to you as well". Also, Dan needs to learn stand up sumo and harder yoriki. He will keep getting pulled down since his stance is so low.
Perfect 5 on KachiClash. I'm thinking this may come out alright.
So, due to shimpans' ego yesterday (not calling mono-ii on hair pull) evil spirits went on rampage today
>>157090147ah don’t worry dan got his ten wins in he’s back to being ozeki one cupnow an unemployed catgirl with abominable hygiene can chug him dry, pour some water in him and use him for a makeshift ashtray until she rolls over while slovening and knocks him over and spills the brown tobacco tar water all over the tatami
>>157090004Nah hes fine doing all of this with a bum ankle btw
>>157090059>this may come out alright>HiradogumiRoru. Rumao.
humiliated that henkafag
>>157090493Me on the right.
>>157090493Asakoryu is what Enho was supposed to be. He is, unironically, growing on me. Always liked fast and agile rikishi.
>>157090823he's fineI admire clowning on Abi
Kotoeiho is really growing on me, that guy had some of the best bouts this basho and last, and he is getting good scores on top of it.
>>157090918Inverted and puffy nipples are my kryptonite as well.
>>157089329kek love Ura throwing out the tiniest pinch, he knew this guy had it covered
So at what point does the Yokozuna council get involved with Onosato? This shit is getting ridiculous.
>>157091103horse is first on the line for the glue factory
>>157091135Nah. It's very much "what have done for me lately." Hoshoryu's been at least somewhat interesting in the past year.
>Shishi once faced (and lost) to the young Kotozakura in World Junior Sumo Finals before Kotozakura's rise. Shishi thought of him as his rival.https://youtu.be/HCQi5QOWSRY?t=44Tomorrow's bout will be many years in the making. Shishi is no longer curtain jerking on the bottom of the card. He is dancing with the sanyaku.
>>157091172Asashoryu once won all six cups in a calender year. Four basho into this year and Hoshoryu hasn't even hit 12 wins.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5bIr9IDXFfA>Thread theme
>>157090366nani
maybe promoting horseshitryu to yokozuna for beating kinbozo and ohno wasnt such a good idea after all
>>157091354>Would you henka me? I henka myself... I henka myself hard...
>>157091509>PUT THE FUCKING YUSHO IN THE BASKET
>>157091497NSK needed yokozuna for London and Paris and he took the bullet. He'd have been amazing ozeki.
>>157091578It's literally all Hakkaku's fault. He's directly responsible for the pushing of a Yokozuna promotion.
>>157091530>Dan and Silent Shishi Yusho's back>"Who's teaching these two babies japanese?">"Hmmm... the talented one is teaching the clumsy one...?">Baby Dan turns to Baby Shishi>"Uchimuso, uchimuso, uchimuso!">Time passes>"UCHIMUSO TO KOTOZAKURA, UCHIMUSO TO TAKAYASU, UCHIMUSO TO HOSHORYU, UCHIMUSO TO EVERYONE! Noice, noice, 1, 2, 3, grabbing mawashis, grabbing chonmages, grabbing cocks and balls...!">Shishi stops Aonishiki and points to Hakakku>Hakakku: "Please win the basho with more than 11 wins...">"Five toes old man put the toenails on my feet! If the toenails don't appear, you own-own me... MY JUNGLE LOVE! OWE OWE OH"
Dan lost today.
>>157091767Sumo lost today.
Kazuma you useless sack of shit.
I'm starting to believe in loosey goosey Atamifuji mainly because it rhymes a little
No one believed in Takayasu and he still choked.
>>157092136I was low key keeping an eye on the dream. However I think its cause Shishi was/is stealing the dream headlines that it wasn't said much. Plus a lot of people are just expecting something bad to happen to him anyway.
If Aonishiki wins then we will have 2 ozeki who each have won more Yusho than Hoshoryu has.Is this supposed to happen? Has this ever happened before to a yokozuna if we exclude all the ozeki who also made it to yokozuna?(theoretically we have to assume if Dan and Kirishima could fail their runs, how does that look for Hosh if he also never yusho as a zuna?)
>>157091767He got cheated
>>157092170>I was low key keeping an eye on the dreamNice job asshole.
>>157082096>>157083849He reminds me of this Detroiters scene
Today I will remind them.
Kirishima vs Aonishiki is gonna be sick
>>157089845The karmic scales are rebalanced. The evil spirits have been satisfied.
>>157092543Kirishima is healthier so the smart money's on him.
>>157092543>Kirishima teleports behind Aonishiki after the tachiai>"Sorry, Aonigger or whatever your name is but this is my era: I’m going to be the next Yokozuna!">He pushes forward to Aonishiki's back, but hits nothing>"!">Aonishiki teleported behind Kirishima>grabs his chonmage>"Mongolian scum, dirty stepperat, your time has passed; we Ukrainians dominate the sport now!">he grabs Kirishima's chonmage with both hands and starts shaking him around like in a cartoon, faster and faster, until he lets go, sending him flying into the fifth row>Aonishiki wins the bout>no monoii
>>157092136honestly, I believed a bit. this one is on me
>>157092675>Kirishima rides into the dohyo on horseback
>Only just noticed that JWags videos have trans rights bullshit at the end of themAaaand channel blocked.
>>157092686You doomed him, anon. Week without borsh and salo, only natto.
jesus I was browsing the Ikazuchi-beya website and this is the picture they use for shishiwhite deviru indeed
>>157093353>獅子Who?
>獅 (Shishi) means lion>獅子 (Shishi) also means lionThey deserved more than two nukes honestly.
>>157093368I guess the photographer didn't know what kanji they used to spell shishiAlso the website notes that his speciality is the initial collision and his mbti is ISTJ
>>157093353cute!
>>157093160>only natto.I miss him...
>>157093715He's right there dude.
>>157092675K-kino...
>>157093898What's Polish for cinema?
>>157093915"Kino"Yes
>>157091656and kitanoumi for bloating the jungyo
Reports of hundred of requests arriving to Ikazuchi stable of Nipponese women asking to "mount the lion"
>>157088715Does this sport attract lots of Bara chasers? It's just awfully suspicious that there's so many "fans" of naked fat Japanese men splitting their cheeks apart and showing their taint to the cameras...
>>157094109Some of the twitch/YT streams are insufferably horny at times, yeah
>>157093954NSK is easing on the jungyou schedule starting next summer.
>>157094120I only started watching because of Aris watching Midnight Sumo. I was crying of laughter. Its a shame he saw so many fat guys scrotums he stopped watching. >They throw the salt to purify the ring. And they taste the salt because they're FAT
>>157094170Salt has many calories.
>>157092243You forgetting someone?
>>157093353I can see bloodlust in his eyes
>>157094170Unrelated to sumo but I've never seen this man open his mouth without whining. It's insufferable to me. What do people find entertaining about him?
Is there gambling on sumo, or dohyo is protected from a grabby hands of dame da ne guys?
>>157094880Middy would ban you for that post
>>157094880Underground and outside Japan. Once every few years there is a scandal. Yakuza obviously are involved.
>>157094268Get that Juryo jobber out of here.
shrimp man's reaction face
>>157094880I dunno but to me it seems like sumo gambling might be a horrible idea considering how chaotic and unpredictable it tends to be
>>157095265He looks like a giant baby.
feels like today is gonna make or break the yusho race for everyone
>>157095268Just be friends with the yakuza guys who fix the matches. It's that simple.
>>157095344Every day from day 12 onwards feels like that.
also feels like a make or break for the rope run here, 1-4 isn't abysmal but losing when aonishiki was injured is a bit spookyalso why did sumostats change to look like vibe coded dogshit, it was fine already. why do they keep doing this
>Zak
>>157095377>Just be friends with the yakuza
Has the Yokozuna v. Yokozuna match on the final day of the tournament ever ended in a fusen?
>>157095469Hate how this site looks, modern slop. SumoDB brutally mogs. Please never ever change, Herr SumoDB-san.
>>157095551Not many times, but most recently in November....
>>157095632I'm just trying to think of ways this basho could be even more of a clown basho than it already is.
>>157095551
>>157095469Because they vibe coded an update obviously probably because they thought it's way easier than maintaining whatever spaghetti they had
>>157095678Y1wyoWhats the yo
>>157095702
>>157095702When there's only one Ozeki so one of the Yokozunas is an acting Ozeki, iirc.
if kiriSHITma gets promoted to yokozuna its going to be another horseSHITryu tier disaster or worse. kiriSHITma just doesn't have the level of ability needed to consistently dominate the way a yokozuna is supposed to, he is ozeki tier.
>>157095265Shishi no, he's not food!
>>157095702>Yokozuna-ozeki.There must always be two Ozeki on the banzuke. Yokozuna count as Ozeki for that purpose if necessary.
>>157095905He's so cool...
>>157095789You have a strange obsession with shit, anon. Are you a German with a VPN?
I DON'T WANNA GO
>>157096054BACK TO THE PIT
>>157095905>"There are always two Ozeki: one Yokozuna-Ozeki and one plain Ozeki.">"Which one did we force to retire, the Yokozuna-Ozeki or the Ozeki?"
El león sonriente should rise
>>157096582I don't think Shishi's chaos sumo will work against Zak, as banged up as he is.
>>157096573hes so cute and good natured and anons here bully him so much...
>>157096641He's an asshole.
>>157096573that's a "fuck it i give up" face
new toss
>>157096628Shishi has developed physical power on par with peak Tochinoshin, he will be in the basho race regularly as long as he stays uninjured
I just found out that onosatos bad performance is because he contracted aids
>>157095265Holy shit
Onosato just found out that AIDS can be contracted from sake bottles.
>>157096872
>>157096872It's like the Rapist of Reiwa if he let himself go.
Okay, so what's the state of affairs?Anonishiki needs 10 (done) to bounce back to ozeki, innit.Kirishima NEEDS the yusho?KWABozunas won't get forced to retire this time either, right?What else?
>>157096704
>>157097071Watch his stables new year video. Guy comes across as a bully desu.
>>157097050Atamifuji ozeki-run active, but still early stages.
>>157097095Higher ranked rikishi, especially yokozunas, bully the lower ones. I think it comes with the training and drill and lifestyle in a stable. Everyone starts down there... except Onosato lol.
Onosato never faced adversity. He has just the big Boi who walked forward and won. First time it gets difficult and he just collapses, what a pussy
>>157097231>Higher ranked rikishi, especially yokozunas, bully the lower onesThanks for repeating what I said. He's an asshole. Meanwhile Zak is nice to everyone.
>>157097267Zak is the most soulful rikishi doing it. Hinkaku for days.
>>157097050>Kirishima NEEDS the yusho?Pretty much. There was talk on NHK that maybe he could be yokozuna with 13 wins + yusho. Hiro unironically said 12 wins + yusho.
>>157097095can you actually give an example or do you want us to skim through hours of footage
>>157097445Yeah make sure you leave a comment, like and subscribe as well
>>157097445When he takes Shunrai's phone and threatens to break it.
>>157097445Slurp your slop, Suomi.
>>157097265>difficultIf only he stuck to his style of sumo...
>>157097215>Atamifuji ozeki-runNot seeing it.>>157097440>12 wins yushoBest not be the case. It's bad as it is now, let's not make it worse.
>>157097458pretty sure he's just a jokester as much as shunrai is
>>157097231Yeah, it's definitely that frat house lifestyle combined with hazing being widely accepted in Japanese culture (not just in sumo).
>>157097563The problem is that owing to his rank no one is allowed to check him on his antics, so he can go too far and no one can say shit.
>>157097532>Not seeing it.Early stages.... very early. We'll beat it into him, don't worry.
>>157097621Beat it? You mean glare it.
>>157097610you are absolutely right on that, this just seems like friends fucking aroundhttps://youtu.be/LjwWZk5bTUo?t=1174
>>157097662The fact that he even has to tell people they can eat shows how nervous everyone is around him.
>>157097610just rank up ez then you can make your juniors hold your purse for you while you go shopping
Just got caught up…. My boy…. ;~;
>>157097720isn't that stable rules? iirc lower ranked wrestlers can't eat until higher ranked have eaten or something stupid like that
>>157097720He's a yokozuna. He can do whatever the fuck he wants.
>>157097754Had the eyes of someone who just had surgery.
>>157097720They're afraid he'll put the Curse of the Yuusholess Rikishi on them.
>>157097720This is the culture that has people sit around in a room based on feudal hierarchy, because 600 years ago you wouldn't have the daimyo sit with his back to the door in case he gets stabbed. Autism is hardcoded in their DNA
>>157097755It's kind of weird to me as ex military because in the military it was also lowest ranked eat first. They have the shittier lives so you let them eat first
>>157095265Put some respect on Ex-Chiyonokuni's name newfag
>>157097856Yeah, but the high rankers shower first after practice, then go eat. Why should they have to wait if they're clean and hungry?
>>157097906>>157095265
>>157095265>>157096872aggressive, yet peggable
>>157098036Why should anyone hungry have to wait?
>>157097772That’s why I boy him
Post the Kakuryo homo match.
>>157098122Because they haven't earned it yet.
>>157089506Now that's a list of matches right there. Go get em Shishi.
>>157098036OK well to expand on that, I meant the lower ranked got to be served first. The food is right there, the lower ranks eating isn't preventing the upper ranks from being served or eating, it's all in separate bowls. Just let them eat. It's weird Asian culture, I watched some k drama with my wife and someone gets promoted so all the underlings to "celebrate" go to his office and stand at attention staring at the walls while the promoted guy sits on a couch. Very non western
>>157098433It's not all in separate bowls. The staple chankonabe for example. High rank = tasty portions.
>>157098433>>157097856The higher rankers eat first because they earned the right to eat first. Lower rankers having shittier lives is supposed to encourage them to do well so they don't have to live that way anymore. It applies to every aspect of sumo life from accommodations to the clothes they're allowed to wear. That's the traditional mindset at least. Some of the contemporary elders are starting to push back against it.
This basho deserves a shishi yusho
>>157098473I guess it depends on the Heya. In futagoys case you often see them standing around while all the food is already out on the table getting cold, while they just wait for roga to say go ahead
it was all over after onosharto fucked up the dohyo iri. he is now cursed to suck forever. the demons will never let go
how does the lifestyle posturing work in the stables where they don't have any sekitori, does the highest rank guy get to treat the others like the boss by default or are they all more or less treated on the same tier until one of them gets juryo?
>>157098817They huddle under the stable master for warmth and suckle on his teats for sustenance.
>>157092675you forgot the part where chiyoshoma shoots an arrow at aonishiki with the giant ceremonial twirling bow from the tunnel, and misses, accidentally hitting that one turbo-chinlet yobidashi
ok but seriously why does he look like that?
I think Dan should sit out this yusho race.Just stop Kirishitma at any cost and chill. 11-4 12-3 would be great considering his current injuries and also will somewhat balance hinkaku since it would be a great dissapointment to win a cup due to 1 hairpull bout judged incompetently.It would be a great clown basho finale to have several maegashitters fight for the cup.
>>157098817It's usually the latter. >>157099253Being hardstuck jonokuchi/jonidan is a corrupting influence. >vid unrelated
>>157099354>1 hairpull bout judged incompetentlyLike Koto did to him today?
>>157099354If he sits out, there's still a good chance that Kirishima can yuusho, even if Aonishiki wins. He's all but guaranteed to go up against Hoshoryu tomorrow (the head to head favors Kiri) and day 15 will be Zak, which will be a toss-up. I think Shishi's going to take an L against Zak, but I'm not sure who he's going to go up against in the final few days (maybe Aonishiki or Atamifuji?) Takerufuji's the big wild card here; I think he has a chance against Sharto and any Ozeki/Zuna competition he could face after that will be tied up in their obligatory Zuna v. Ozeki/Zuna v. Zuna matches in the last two days.
>>157099406I watched it in slo mo on natto, there was no hairpull
big night tonight
>>157099660>look mom I posted it again
>>157099441don't think JSA will promote Kirishitma on 12-3but mby I'm wrong and they have no problem with make koshi zunas
Great ending: Shishi yushoGood ending: Dan yushoBad ending: Kirishima yusho + another questionable Yokozuna promotion True ending: someone else wins
>>157099771i fucking hope they don't. a 12-3 jy 12-3 y would be the weakest promotion since whenever sumodb started tracking. a 12-3 jy 13-2 y would be tied for the weakest.
>>157099838Takerufuji here to snag another yuusho out of nowhere then go kyuujo and land back in Juryo
>>157099660>all of the yusho challengers put up against mediocrities with records near or in MK territory, only Dan has to face off against someone with a good record is anyone else noticing this?
>>157099873it makes enough sense to do ozeki vs about to be ozeki again, and its not like its a setup, aonishiki is currently up against kirishima
>>157099873Zak and Sharto, even on a bad day, are better than the maegashitter bottom-feeders that Shishi and Takerufuji have been feasting on for most of the tournament.
>>157099873In all likelihood one of them is going to win the yusho, they have to fight eventually.
>>157099873>schizo delusion>danfagO im noticing alright
>>157099873Are you retarded?
>>157089749Zak might lose just to keep things interesting
>>157100034>>157089749Shishi might have the power to handle Zak but on the other side Zak has the brains, he might win with a quick pull down or something.
If the YDC has said that he's up for promotion then it means May counted as an equivalent and any yusho will promote him. Same as Hoshoryu.
>>157100045Shishi might as well just stumble into not losing a balance or losing it while being on top. He is winning by simply surviving this basho.
>>157099771no way they promote him with 12-3jy/12-3y. when Takakeisho had the same results, they told him to fuck off back in 2023 and that was when there was only 1 barely functioning yokozuna. now we have 2. they're not desperate for a new yokozuna to promote him with such shit results.
>>157093426it's the same kanji but the second one has 'child' after it, lion and young lion. it's perfectly logical.
>>157093426Shíshì shī shì shǐ shì, shì shǐ, shī shì, shì shí shí shī. Shī sì shì shī. Shǐ shì shè sì, shì shī shì, shǐ shī shì shí shī shī, shì shí shí, shǐ shí shìshì. Shǐ shǐ shì shì shì shì, shì shī shì. Shì shì shì shì.
>>157099253lemur ancestry
>>157100630Chinese is the work of Satan
Sheesh she
Do you think kazuma has realized he has a losing record
>>157094578He's a fighting game player and whining is like breathing to them. The entire fighter community is like that so they don't see anything wrong with it and act superior to those who aren't this way. Aris is just the biggest AIDS bearer in the HIV group.Additionally, 80% of Twitch streamers aren't actually cut out for streaming as a job in which you entertain people because they are total charisma vacuums, but, fortunately, so is their audience, who treat broadcasting as friend simulation and get super angry whenever someone treats streamers like jesters who get 10x of your monthly salary by being thrown tomatoes at, which they are.
>>157101024truth nuke
yokozuna are supposed to win
>>157101246Maybe they should stop promoting people just cause they go on a little winning streak.
>>157101024all of this is very accurate, good job
>>157101246> ONOSATO! YOUR M17 HAS RETURNED! I BRING THE DESTRUCTION OF YOUR SENSE OF SELF-WORTH!
>>157101024i watch aris occasionally and this made me kek. Aris is really funny, so much funnier than any streamer alive. But his nutlicking chat is beyond cringe. And all Aris does is wait for some idiot or ESL to type in his chat and he goes on the same script and then bans them.I was laughing my head off when Aris started respecting Midnight Sumo for banning his chat for petty reasons like calling the sumo players fat lmao. But yeah, he's become quite the angry boomer lately, he's fed up with videogames but doesn't know how to quit streaming so he just plays the same fucking RE or Dark Souls every stream and then waits for Path of Exile updates.
>>157101355Chicken-legs will never be Yokozuna.Never.Screen-cap this post.
>>157101024>10x salaryI make more than double the top 1000. There are thousands and thousands of streamers, so I'm not mad that a few hundred make way more money than me for having to shit job of talking to thousands of people constantly. Obviously some streamers complain way too much, but personally I could not read the chat from retards all day and pretend to be their friend without blowing my brains out
Watching Atamifuji absolutely body that guy in the rematch was pure art. Rotund domination.
>>157101430You are going to regret this post in 5 years bud
>>157101355Remember when people thought chicken legs and onosharto would be the two dominant forces in sumo going forward. Lmao kwab.
>>157101481totally disagree, if my job was sitting around all day doing fuck all playing video games it would be my dream job I would not give 2 fucking cents if you made 20 times more than me, its better than having a job.
>>157101508If it was some dream scenario where I could just act like myself, sure I would take it, but I'm not the natural entertainer, and I don't prefer to be the one talking in a group. So for me it would be hell to have to essentially act all day everyday in a way completely antithetical to how I normally act. Also I like my job
>>157099660Somewhere in the steppes of Mongolia Hakuho performs his dark dohyo-iri, sending the cursed spirits to once again erode the spirit of the current yokozuna for the transgressions the JSA laid upon him.
I watched some youtube doc about mongolian kids doing sumo to escape mongolia, and unsurprisingly there are tons and tons of them. If there were no limitations on the one foreigner rule there would be no recruitment issues at all. Does japan have any extra potential recruits they have to whittle down or is it basically anyone who is japanese and wants to join a stable can find a stable to join?
>>157101246At risk of coming across like an apologist, look at any Yokozuna's career record and take note of what their match history looks like after they get an injury. The JSA don't have the same tolerance of sitting out for Yokos as it does for any other ranks, if you elect to sit out for more than 1 basho you might as well resign. It doesn't help that it's a really poor look for Yokos to skip tours so they basically can't do that either. Getting injured as a Yoko sucks because your chances of ever getting a full recovery are slim due to the expectations to perform, so they tend to enter a death spiral. I also think that previous rank-holders like Asashoryu and Hakuho set people up for the false expectation that once promoted, a Yokozuna is going to either win or JY every basho for the next 5 years, when in reality both of them were exceptionally anomalous examples.>>157101279Sometimes I feel that it should be 3 back-to-back Yusho or JY to be considered for Yoko and your first basho as Ozeki doesn't count, but then what difference would it make since you need to have pretty stellar performance just to attain Ozeki.
>>157101641>3 back to back and first as ozeki doesn't countok so how many yokozunas would there be in the last 50 years if this was the case?
Dan is going to save sumo from a potential kiriSHITma yokozuna promotion by beating him tonight and taking the yusho and the ungrateful Dan haters are going to seethe about it like the toxic trash that they are
>>157101681Ideally 0 or 1. Yokozunas are a meme. Too many shitters. Gotta weed out the scrubs.
>wakamiyabi wins>mita wins>nabatame loses>3 way futaGoy playoffwould be kino
>>157101681>3 back-to-back Yusho or JY and your first basho as Ozeki doesn't count15, 17 if you don't require at least one of those basho to be an actual yusho. Wakanohana II and Musashimaru only make it if you don't need one of those three to be a yusho. Futahaguro, Harumafuji, Kakuryu, and Hoshoryu don't make it period. And Kaio gets yokozuna.
>>157101605Mongols have survivorship bias. The most elite Mongols have reached the apex of sumo, but everyone conveniently ignores salaryman mongols like Mitoryu or Azumaryu.
>>157101927Plus with the foreigner limits only the ones that show promise or are nepo recruits get brought in to begin with.
>>157101939>>157101927Yeah I get that, I'm asking do the native japs have any survivorship bias or is it just completely open floodgates and if there was any competition at all people like Koga wouldn't be let in
>>157101952It depends on the stable and is subject to age limits, but in general any Japanese kid who wants to join a stable can. Some are more selective than others because they still have to pay for food and expenses plus make room for them, but there will always be at least one stable willing to take them.
>>157101939>nepo recruitshorseSHITryu
>>157101605I think the difficulty of life in a stable and the higher availability of decent jobs in Japan is enough to deter all but the most enthusiastic recruits from joining up. I suppose you might still get some whittling down if you have potential recruits who don't seem like they'd be physically capable of having a successful career, and even then you get anomalies like Enho.
holy get a load of those titties
>>157102060In absolute fucking awe of Tochimusashi, a man to inherit Zak's will
>>157102072he's gonna be in the sandanme playoff against tenshoyama, should be intredasting. Jk/Jd both had only one guy go zensho, and niggatame is on the verge of doing the same in makushita
The prophecy is set into motion...
>onosato didn't kyujoKinboshi time!!!
>>157101768Now we just need niggatame to lose
Aonishiki is going to lose to Kirishima tonight, but Kiri will choke like always on day 15 and face him again for a playoff, which Aonishiki will win.
>All the women screaming during the Omori matchI think thats the thing that's surprised me the most since i started watching Sumo late last year. I did not think so many women were into it.
>>157101605>>157101952Some stables only take you in if you show potential. Others will take in anybody. Shikihide stable for example is infamous for taking in any retard who walks through the door. It's essentially a boarding house for troubled youths with nowhere else to go (the stablemaster was really into charity/outreach work even while he was an active wrestler). webm very much related
>>157102390>Shikihide stable for example is infamous for taking in any retard who walks through the door. It's essentially a boarding house for troubled youths with nowhere else to go (the stablemaster was really into charity/outreach work even while he was an active wrestler). webm very much relatedWholesome. Elitists can choke on chankonabe.
>>157102374Omori hasn't had a chance to bloatmax, so he still has a conventionally attractive physique.
>>157102390Aw, that's really sweet. Tho those kids who just sit down should still get picked up and thrown out of the ring, for equivalent entertainment exchange.
>>157102374>>157102411His stablemaster was extremely popular with the ladies, even with the ugly bastard physique.>His rise was so swift it didn’t give his hair enough time to grow long enough to be tied into a topknot, which made him stand out even more. Add to that a combination of raw power and good looks, and he became a fan favorite, attracting female fans who had previously shown no interest in sumo.>As I recall, this was when the term “su-jo” (sumo women), referring to female sumo enthusiasts, first emerged.>Endo’s meteoric rise up the rankings coincided with that period when match-fixing and other scandals had dealt sumo a serious blow. Looking for a way out of the morass, the Japan Sumo Association’s eyes turned to Endo as a potential savior.>One gimmick that the association came up with was to set up a face-cutout stand featuring Endo in the Ryogoku Kokugikan arena, by which the fans could pose as if they were a princess being carried away by the sumo star. It was a huge hit and there were often lines for photos.>Nagatanien Co., a major food products manufacturer, featured Endo in its TV commercials for its ochazuke tea-soaked rice, and also put up hefty prize money for his matches. Endo’s popularity became a social phenomenon of sorts.
>>157102374Rikishi are seen as, for lack of a more polite way to put it, quite macho men in Japan. Since Sumo is a huge lifestyle dedication to participate in, they are generally admired for their discipline and dedication, and the relevance of Sumo in Japan's history goes a long way. They carry a lot of weight, but they are still nationally respected athletes. There is a common saying in Japan that goes "Sumo wrestlers have pretty wives".Something Sumo demonstrates is that regardless of how you look, cultural norms play a huge part and while looks will get you a first date, it's the rest of you that gets you a second.
>>157102494>looks will get you a first date, it's the rest of you that gets you a second.fuckin' A
>>157102494>There is a common saying in Japan that goes "Sumo wrestlers have pretty wives".You be the judge.
>>157102579
>>157102579He ate the entire cake btw.
>>157102592I'm sure they'll raise many adorable fish together.
>>157102592
>>157102603>those teethnahI guess I can understand the women liking these fatsos, but I can't understand signing up to be an okami
#hagwatch continues to find success
>>157102603
>>157102579>>157102592>>157102603>>157102642>>157102645
Who do you guys rate between Midorifuji and Asasuiryu?
>>157102676I'm always pulling for Midorifuji, I love his little guy sumo.
>>157102474> tea-soaked rice
>>157102701https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chazuke
THE MAN WITH ONE THOUSAND DECIBELSKIMURAKANUKRO
>>157102676Midorifuji 100%But his health is catching up. Recent heart trouble along with older injuries like herniated disc.
>>157102701What about semen-soaked rice?
>>157102746fuck me wrong webm
Fuck, poor Nishinoryu. Aborted start, knee is all fucked up, manages to get Kagayaki dead to rights, knee gave out on him when it matters most. Motherfucker of a match.
>>157102676>>157102746>>157102757That's the one
>>157102791Bouts like that remind you that Sumo wrestling is still wrestling, and it's perfectly viable to throw a motherfucker's body to the streets.
>>157102592she know what those lips do
If there is any justice in this world, Takerufuji will get henka'd tonight
that woman praying lol
>>157102913Yeah, no way that happens now after what Meisei just pulled.
I rate Fudoho. Future San'yaku, bet the house on it.
>>157102791Thank you for the catharsis, seeing Hokuseiho eat shit and Midorifuji do anything cool is nice to experience again
good job stealing one, thomas washington
>>157102960It''s the perfect reason to do it, the humiliation will be complete.
tamawashi kk is still alivethank fuck
>>157102390Still can't believe that the current Shikihide managed to get a sekitori in his stable faster than Musashigawa has in his entire 20+ year oyakata career (vid rel). I have hopes for Tokunomusashi and the new recruit from the US he recruited last June though, so maybe it isn't over yet.
That was cool stuff.
Firecracker of a match to finish Juryo tonight, damn that lift.
>>157103004>Shikihide was in poor health for much of 2020, and his wife in her role as okamisan took an increasing role in running the stable, even overseeing training. Half the stable's wrestlers ran away in early August 2020, complaining about her strict behavior and invasions of their privacy.[7] They were persuaded to return, and although no violence was involved the Sumo Association's compliance committee is continuing to investigate and interview the wrestlers involved.>In April 2025, the stable's 33 year-old jonidan-ranked wrestler Wakatozakura died from necrotizing fasciitis (flesh-eating disease)
>>157103065
>>157103083Apparently it from necrotizing fascitis of the penis btw
YOISHO
>>157103065>33 year-old jonidan-ranked wrestler Wakatozakura died from necrotizing fasciitisFournier's gangrene from diabetes most likely, not a good Google image search tbdesu
Dirty feetslut
>>157103161disgusting, have them smashed and bound immediately
Today will be Onosato's last day on Earth...
>>157103161I demand she cover them up before I go feral
>>157103161Want to lick them after all the anons cum on them!!!
>Aonishiki jobbed outkek what a broken ankle hair pulling cheating failed bitchKWABAHPCFB
The Thread Deliberation Council has issued a Notice to Move to a New Thread. When this present thread hits 500 replies, you will be promoted to thread 14. >>157103192>>157103192>>157103192
Looking forward to watching Kazuma lose again like a bitch
>>157103238Kazuma making ya seethe?
>>157103252I was pro-Kazuma but I can't support a loser
>>157102374sumos are gigachads compared to the average incel salaryman typeswomen love guys that can make them feel smallplus most of them prob have a feeder fetish
>>157103259Trust the plan.
Mitakiumi's spirit is gone. Very sad to see.
I am no longer a fat ugly bastard supporter
>>157103263
>Chiyohenka
Didn't see a possible way Chiyoshoma could've won that.
He's losing Social Credit for that one.
The. Flying. Monkey.
BIZZZAARRUUUUUU!!!!
>>157102494>They carry a lot of weight
nice reversal
That was nice.
I never noticed until now that Gonoyama’s left tit is normal, but his right one is weird and double-stacked like Kotozakura’s
Proper fatslap, that.
>>157103197why does a white man doing good at sumo cause browns to seethe vehemently?
>>157102374I think some Japanese women are just freaky like that and into the bloatlord phenotype, like the Slavic couple meme
>>157103701Because browns are inferior, know it, and resent it...
>>157103004I'm convinced Musashigawa is just a bad coach. He had an interview before the May or March basho that confirmed it for me but right now I can't remember the details.
