So what's everyone's major problem with this episode?Previous:>>214226874>>214223051
>>214232428My problem is that a few people are actually watching this nothing show
>>214232428Took too long for the hell to break loose, it's episode 5 not 1 even if it's a flashback.Xeno looked bad and got outrun by a woman lightly jogging along the corridors, what the hell?Kavalier paying someone to sabotage the ship was dumb.Ending music choices continue to be terrible.Morrow was good but his motivation is weak.The cuteye was the star of the episode.
Discuss
>>214232626>perfect organism
>In space, no one can save you from DEI incompetence
>>214232656In space, people start losing brain matter because of the microgravity and stuff.
>>214232656It all makes sense when you realize that only dumb and desperate people would agree to go on a 65 year mission in space to retrieve something for some corporation.
>>214232626I think this Xeno might be damaged, like mentally or something.It keeps doing shit like this, with letting its victim get away so it can have fun chasing them, not to mention how it had the brother straight up dead to rights but decided to use him as bait...for some reason?
>>214232626Pretty cool. Its a real rubber suit just like the 80s
>>214232626This makes no sense. Its CGI.Just shoop the thing already killing her. No need for a chase.Dumbass "artists" cant even do the sfx right.
>>214232428Filler episode desu, characters are genuinely retarded, and the plot is too contrived, I mean it was basically a rehash of the first episode, filled with retarded ideas, that probably should've been left on the cutting room floor. Think I'll tap out until the run finishes, and binge watch the rest.
Why does Mr Teng act like that?
He tried to warn them...
So let me get this straight.This was specifically a mission to collect multiple alien organisms.Even Kavalier knew about this mission apparently.Yutani personally is involved in the mission.Yutani sent their top operative that they personally trust to secure the cargo.And the rest of the crew is :>tweaked out schizo doctor that drinks on the job>a clearly deranged chinaman pervert>first officer sassy latina that can't handle shit>two coal miner engineer types, one of them a halfwit>the most incompetent xenobiologist available>"most likely to sell us out" award winner that somehow passed screening>security guard intern that can't secure a paper bagI'm not even sure why these people were necessary for the trip. They don't seem to do anything at all. Why is the xenobiologist even performing experiments with poor oversight. Can they not just secure the alien cargo and simmer the fuck down. Why it she experimenting on the go? Why not just wait until the cargo is delivered? This is a new low in the "petting alien snake" franchise.
>>214232782He is enlightened.
>>214232716Assholes where first complaining that the xenomorph killed people without even trying to impregnate them now people are mad that the xeno didn't immediately kill her
>>214232428>So what's everyone's major problem with this episode?It was entertaining. The eyeball alein was the highlight of the episode. It just triggered a bunch of ackshually autists because of the alien containment equipment and procedures.
>>214232428i think like everyone who worked on this is a fan of the first movienot sure tho
>>214232656This is sum Mandela shit, I was sure keith david died recently.
>>214232786I guess they lost their best while retrieving the specimen and the remaining ones were asleep, only the most useless were awake during the incident.
>>214232786The only justification that comes to mind is that all the competent crew members got ripped apart trying to secure the specimens and the retards that should've died remained.
>>214232782All this time i thought it was a synth or an ai bot programmed by yutani to deliberately release the aliens. If he was a human the he sure as hell acted pretty strangely.
>>214232428Why did you post a child?
This show is getting high reviews on normie sites and all my trusted YouTubers have panned it. I know who I'm trusting.Btw/tv/ shills for last of us, Korean pop, and Sam Hyde.I'd rather eat my own shit than listen to this board of degeneratesEnjoy your alium slop I guess.
>>214232626>me flirting with the cute Latina in the elevator
>>214232626How is she outrunning it lol
>>214232428Alex Lawther is relentlessly handsome.
>>214232784>HeDid you just presume Ey's gender? Bigot Delete your account
>>214232865 Canadian
>>214232866>when the only competent person on the ship is a fucking eyeball tentacle monster
>>214232854The person who made this post is sexy and smart and we'd like to know a little bit less than he does
>>214232428Morrow being Sherlock Holmes for filler when he can just hook into the computer. Although did predict after ep1 that the crash was deliberate, thought it was Teng being suicidal over his waifu getting eaten. Some shit for brains asked why how the ship crashed mattered.
>a drunken slav bum sabotaged the engine (multiple times) with such precision that the now unguided ship landed right in the capitol of Prodigy territory, taking into account the distance and Earth's rotation.Impressive, most impressive!
>>214232866Ocellus taking on the Xeno (twice) gives me DIE YOU SPACE FAGGOT vibes from Predators; a clearly weaker being taking on a much stronger monster. What a glorious bastard.
What is the fifth alien?
>>214232994Some fly. It's going to be in the next episode, and both it and the plant seem pretty boring.
>>214232994something that laid eggs in petrovich's wife's eyes
>>214232784Was it a warning or a distraction? Why would it help its captors instead of becoming allies with space leeches
>>214233022Warning, I think.
>>214232428they think they're watching Alien and aren't aware that they're watching Fargo season 6.
>>214232626>The Xenomorph in Alien just outright grabbed and head-bited people to death instantly>Literally once it got within a few feet of you it was too late>This one swaps between being able to murder a whole room of people in 10 seconds, or being unable to kill a single dumpy woman with a minute of leeway
>The actual alien looks awful and acts retarded>All of the new aliens are boring>Even the mystique of the eyeball were ruinedJust remember that instead of this slop, we could have gotten a series about aliens loose in future nyc, colonial marines attempting to contain them and the subway tunnels being turned into a giant hive.This is just further proof that alien only works as a bug hunt.
>>214232735There's a trend lately with these tv shows where they always have a mid-season flashback episode as filler.These scripts are written off of a committee-designed format guaranteeing them to be structured like garbage and written by amateurs.
>>214233086That's a man
>>214233097The eyelien wrote it
>>214232866Ocellus ain’t hear no bell
>>214232626Xenomorphs get some weird sexual tension shit going on with women, they almost never do it with men. It would have been way more interesting if they actually tried raping and impregnating women, part of them is human afterall.
>>214232735It's a filler because they were trying to bud morrow up as the bad guy and the plot twist is that he isn't.
>>214233115You secure that shit Hudson!
>>214232786why would you send all your best people on a long and dangerous mission where they have a high chance of death unless this mission is critically, life-threateningly important?you want your best scientists in a safe planetside lab grinding out monetizable research and you want your most loyal soldiers guarding your ass directlyyou send expendable retards who are competent enough to most likely get the job done to go pick up bugs from some dangerous shitholethey even said the mission was long and with shit pay, so that probably weeded out anyone not desperate enough to take such a shit job.whole crew dies and ship goes boom? mark up the losses and send in another one, you lost money and not anything important except the one guy you sent to oversee the missionyou're thinking of it like a video game where each mission must succeed to continuebut this is weyland-yutani mission #343598 masterminded by a sketchy rich bitch and her team of psychopathic numbercrunchers>>214233022because they are direct competitioneyeball wants to replace the eyeballs of living thingsleeches and xeno kill living thingsno living things, no eyeballs to replace
>>214232626>alium: I'm right behind her, aren't I?
>>214232626>Episode 2>Massacres an entire unit of soldiers in a split second>Episode 5>Can't even catch a woman running
>>214233012The plant goes through peoples asses, so they're building up to that.
So, how many ticks are crawling through the Prodigy capital now?
>>214233115That man is a woman
Are bedbugs real life aliens
>>214233271I think the ticks are pretty clearly going to become an invasive species.I would bet in the next episode or two we are going to see them taking over the slums of city the ship crashed in.
>>214233271The did a thorough clean sweep and caught two. A job well done.
>>214233210>you want your best scientists in a safe planetside lab grinding out monetizable research and you want your most loyal soldiers guarding your ass directly>you send expendable retards who are competent enough to most likely get the job done to go pick up bugs from some dangerous shithole>they even said the mission was long and with shit pay, so that probably weeded out anyone not desperate enough to take such a shit job.He say this when canonically in universe they have androids, it's contrived, the people they have running that place are sub 80iq retards.
>>214233151That silly little thing would probably write smarter dialogue
>>214233271they died in the crash
So Morrow isn't completely heartless
>>214233334Believe it or not it was an uncredited screenwriter for the thing, the scream the guy made in the last episode was an homage
>>214232817NTA but poor argument, the xenomorph shouldn't stand there like a tard, it should either attack or capture her to put in a coccoon and not just wait around.
What are those "Lawyers" they keep talking about?I thought the world was entirely ruled by 5 corpos. Who is going to enforce the result of one corpo suing another?
> achually antagonistic black droid man dindu nutin she has a daughter too! fuck off
>the containers for the alien parasites that she carries around without handles are literally just glass and will shatter if dropped
>>214233372>I thought the world was entirely ruled by 5 corpos. Who is going to enforce the result of one corpo suing another?Just because it's the future does not stop (((them))) existing.
>>214233372Look up what arbitration is before you embarrass yourself further.
>>214233379Chill out boy kavalier
How did their hyperadvanced tech societies manage to miss a gigantic plane crashing on earth?How did a 60+ year old ghetto cyborg manage to hack a hyperadvanced hybrid prototype?
>>214233349>>214233379Stone cold corpo killer with a heart of gold, the next big twist will be prodigy has his daughters memory engram stored and can upload it into a new body.
>>214233425>How did their hyperadvanced tech societies manage to miss a gigantic plane crashing on earth?Retard. The crash was orchestrated by the company that owns the place where it crashed.
>>214233430That twist would be too good for these writers
>>214232626>>214232702>>214232862>>214233234the xeno always chills out when there's just one person who is not posing an immediate danger and goes out of its way to not immediately kill even when they start resistingconsidering it goes on to glue wendy's brother to a wall it's probably just trying to keep potential hosts alive>>214233314are you unaware that androids are very expensive which is why even safe industrial and colonisation missions only tend to have one on boardif they were cheaper than people why the hell would anyone pay humans to do anything
>>214232786Earth at this time has a REAL competency problem; you gotta understand, these are gen Alpha's descendant's descendant's descendants.They've been exposed to levels of brainrot social media (and probably literal brainrot in the form of industrial chemicals) that shouldn't even be possible.Even the richfags are retarded.
Can an explosion like this with fire happen in space despite no oxygen? Also how did the rest of the crew sleeping in crypto die?
>>214233382>The containers are capable of shattering>They have no airlock for feeding>The opening mechanism is basic enough that an organism can manipulate itI swear everything about this show is built on stupidity.That is not even getting into some random slav being able to sabotage a ship so that it crashes in a specific place on earth, in one piece, days out from the crash.
>tfw the eyeball was a good guy all alongOk, what?
>>214233447there is oxygen inside the ship and the fuel or whatever exploded could've had its own oxidizer
>>214232786I'm guessing they're the B-team that are just supposed to babysit the cryopods, keep up maintenance and wake up the crew that know what they're doing if they're out of their depth. Still a ridiculously incompetent crew for a high priority megacorp mission.
>>214232626i think alien 3 did it quite well, where they had to have a bunch of relay runners because a human would only be able to outrun it for a very short amount of time
>>214233459It wasn't, the director said in a podcast that it was trying to distract the biologist to help the ticks escape.
>>214233459Imagine being a sentient eyeball looking for your lost body can you blame him for being a bit testy
>>214232782So, a 65 year mission. You can't tell me they don't give psych tests out the wazoo to any potential crew members. This guy wouldn't be allowed to get within a country mile of a WY ship in anxhmhapy capacity. He's obviously nuts.
>>214232428how do they go through doors?
>>214232428Production design and atmosphere is great…but god this show is FUCKING STUPID. Like to the point it doesn’t make sense, and I’m not sure what I’m watching, I can’t watch it like a normal show or movie and just turn my brain off and enjoy what I’m seeing—it’s that stupid. Everything is so contrived and DUMB. A Rube Goldberg machine of idiots. Written by actual idiots. So many parts that just don’t make any sense, and others that are cringe and retarded. I’m disappointed because I wanted to like it, but it doesn’t pull enough weight in the areas that matter for any of the cool stuff to pay off. Damn shame. Pointless.
The alien is looking a little too jacked, it was pretty freakishly thin in the first film...
>>214232428i saw in one of these alien earth shill threads a few weeks back that somebody didn't just "call it" but outright seemingly had prior knowledge as to the exact synopsis of what would happen over the next 2 episodes and they tried to play it off like a guess but it's pretty obvious there are literal shills here lmaoboth of their descriptions for the past 2 episodes were right by the way
>>214233447yes if the fuel is oxidisedit's how rockets work in space
I genuinely feel like this show's original script was meant for like Bladerunner or something else cyberpunk-y with the emphasis on androids, cyborgs and uploads, but they couldn't get the rights so they had to fit Alien into the plot somehow instead.
>8ft tall killing machine of pure sinew and muscle can't outrun a girl
>>214233474why didn't it kill the female Captain?
>>214233500Have you seen zoomers these days, they are all roided out and balding at 22. The alien is just following the trends
The xenomorph was the least scariest thing. Ticks are the most.Also, how did the rest of the crew sleeping die?
>>214232428This show absolutely slaps 10/10 franchise saving everything but the first two movies and this can be put in the recycling bin and deleted forever
>>214233482
>>214233520I would have liked a cyberpunk show about some skullduggery between mega corps that ends up with some horrible alien monsters being let loose on a city.As things are right now, being attached to the alien series is just a drag on the show. The alien itself feels tacked on and handled poorly.
>>214233523>Another human-based Xenomorph with the fucking digitigrade legsIs Weyland Yutani injecting everyone with dog DNA or some shit?Why do film makers continue giving it the legs of the Runner?
the asian guy wasnt a synth? why was he weird
>>214232626jd vance if he was based
>>214232626s-she's fast!!
>>214232782he was r/azn_masculinity mod back on earth
>>214233382>lab wasnt in a safe room with 5 inch diamond/sapphire glass with flamethrowers>no biohazard suit to prevent contamination >they were eating and drinking in the lab >they were handling one of the most dangerous creatures in the universe with tweezers>the containers could be lock picked from the inside>chief science woman somehow forgot to put the lid on two of them Yep
>>214233481>>214233583bwo?
>>214233481>>214233583people are claiming there are shills for the show but it seems to be the opposite
>>214233583Crazy people are often not stupid and connect normal for long enough to pass test
>>214233440>spared no expenseLooks you can hand wave it away all you like, but it's still fucking retarded, they wouldn't short change on personal, purely for a business perspective, you wouldn't jeopardise a multi-billion decades investment for a paltry few million on wages.
>>214232428None. I don't presume to think I could write better episodes than the professionals. I think they're pacing the story perfectly. If I'm frustrated with the actions some character has made, it means the writer has done his job. I'm invested in the outcome now. I really enjoy being in this world.
>>214233578>eating food on table with dead rat and multiple dissected alien organisms>opens container before reaching down to pick up dead rat
Eva Mendes, but hotter and prettier
>>214233612I was severely disappointed when there was no tatas in the sex scene this franchise is built around the old ultra violence but you can't throw off a pair of titties what kind of horor buzzkill is this
>>214233557All shows are written by AI and then edited and customized that's why they all seem generic. The Star wars tv show was a perfect example of that. I forgot the name even. Generic space detective slop with star wars costumes
>>214233612>Eva Mendes, but hotter and prettierHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
>>214233578Why would there be any of that? You think anyone making the show gave it any thought?These are professionals, they know what they're doing, how to put a show together.
>>214233058the xeno in alien enjoyed torturing and scaring the crew. xenos have two modes nigger chimpout and jeet stalker.
>>214233605A nitpick but Hammond getting Nedry to do most of the programming for dirt cheap (he technically frauded Nedry which is why he gets pissed off) is brought up as a really dumb idea in-universe.
>>214232735lol, "binge watch" the final remaining episode. You're a chode.
>>214233612Looks like my sister
>nice alien suit bro
>>214233646thats a very mean thing to say about her dude
>>214233271they probably starved to death
>>214233578>>214233583Always the writers/producers fault, but you're not the target audience. The low IQ retarded normies are the audience.
>>214233605>you wouldn't jeopardise a multi-billion decades investment for a paltry few million on wages.lockheed (pre-merger) and boeing nuked multiple billions in valuations by refusing to pay millions for engineering and quality assurance
>>214233659kek
>>214233430>>214233439the twist can't work because morrow's daughter died 60 years ago. no prodigy, no engram tech
>>214233646>Directors used to go out of their way to find the most freakishly tall/thin/huge people for specific monsters/characters>Eh fuck it, slap the 6'1 guy in the xenomorph suit I'm sure he's tall enough
Cinematographer FURIOUSLY masturbating at the foreshadowing of the chestburster
>>214233612In EP1 I actually thought it was her, or at least related. It's uncanny as hell
>>214232817Assholes complaining is all 4chan is anymore. Especially this board. Every single Alien Earth thread is filled with extremely judgmental pricks who think no one watches or approves of this show and anyone discussing it in a positive light is some bad faith shill. This place has become unrecognizable with insane autistic faggots.
>>214233608Whenever I saw the handling in the lab it reminded me of the demon core.
>>214233500It needs breasts and a bigger ass.
>>214233382>DEI hire just puts her completely in a container of bloodsucking aliens
>>214233605That's the thing whenever a scifi show/movie has some big mega-corp in it, they're always some unrealistic horrible mix of retarded and evil.
>>214233684The ironic thing is that Giger would approve of that.So that means they really should make a killer bimbo xenomorph.
>>214232854Is this where we are? You base your decisions on who does and doesn't like something? >"Normies" like it, so I will not. That's pathetic.
>>214233530she liked bobs and vagene
>>214233697I just won't watch it lol
>>214233674what is that powder anyway?
>>214233482did steal that design from yasuke simulator? it looks so bad
>mfw a fucking eyeball was the only thing with a brain on that ship
not gonna lie im a bit tired of the >wei yu acquires aliens>somebody sabotages the rest of the party to get the aliens going>synths are weirdly attracted to aliensformula, we have been doing this for 30 years.Wish aliens would do some weird shit with the creature itself for a change, like some of the comics did>>214233674more like belly buster, but yeah i missed it on the view, it seems obvious now>>214233721i assume it was just a memento from the guy, some soil from his home turf since it said "Utah" on the capsule. Like bringing a piece of home since you going on a space travel for 100 years or w/e
>>214233641good morning saar. kindly do the needful and post pics now
I just jerked off to Sydney and feel guilty because I let my lust taint my love for her. I am an animal.
>>214233608>think how stupid the canister design is if a bug can pick its way out>oh turns out there's usually a lid and the doctor is just extremely lazy and incompetentthese people deserved to crash
>>214233721whatever could the dirt like substance in the cylindrical dirt container labeled UTAH be
>>214232866>>214232893>>214232963>takes on the most feared, most terrifying, most dangerous killing machine in the universe, le perfect organism>twice>stalls it with a host>drives it back on its own>survives >outlives it>is cute as hell while doing itCutiellus won, simple as.
>>214233608IT'S THEIR CULTURE
>>214233674Wouldn't you?
>>214233739Ok
>>214233640Aktualy it's three, but who cares anyway, I'll watch when it's over.
>>214233748i didn't see the utah label alright so i thought it was coffee
>>214233752>tries to make disgusting parasitic creatures>eye gouger should be gross>turns out cuteI know they are too dumb for this to be on purpose
didn't know the company that makes my dog's food also made spaceships
>>214233752more like ferocioucellus
>>214233748So we had Dallas in 1979Tennessee in Covenant (Danny McBride's character)and now Utahwonder which landlocked area they will use next
>>214233752>>214232866>fuck, shit, wtf get off, OH FUCK WHAT THE FUCK GET IT OFF GET IF OFF, FUCK!!!!!!
does the cat has his own cryo sleep tube?
>>214233820xenos are not used to be attacked like prey kek, it freaked out
How do the man go into a woman of she bounce? Wouldn't it bend the guys thingy and hurt?
>>214233837did jonesy have his own tube?
>>214233752Someone needs to make the virgin xenomorph vs the Chad eyeball octopus picture.
>>214233752what was Cutiellus doing in making the character do this? if it was calling the other xeno for backup why did they fight?
>>214232428>Facehuggers and chestbursters cannot be cryopoddedI am pretty fucking certain they absolutely can and have been in the past.Xenomorphs can survive the vacuum of space for an undisclosed period of time, but space is nowhere near as fucking cold as cryostasis.
>>214233845the fuck you trying to say, brahmin scum?
total waste of an episode
>>214233863Didn't it arrive too fast for that? Maybe it wasn't a call, but a warning. Kinda ambiguous.
Totally amazing of an episode
>>214233866perfect organisms cant be frozen, deal with it
>>214233863this scene was bullshit. so we won't ever get to see it talking normally
>>214232784baby xeed was right
>>214233870His thing go inside when she's on top but my question how this possible physically
>>214233855Jonesy didn't need one, he's a god. However he did sleep with Ripley.
>>214233898They very obviously can because in Alien 4 they hate the cold.
>>214233866space is like 2 celsuis above absolute zero. it's pretty fucking cold
>>214232428cute butt
>eyeball fella can only take a host by replacing its eye>xenomorphs have no eyes>this makes them enemiesI wanna shake the hand of whoever came up with this, it’s so simple and stupid but also genius.
>>214233898Yet they have guns that can create biological nets to capture them.
>>214233920no
>>214233916That's not how temperature works, to lose heat requires some sort of substance (like an atmosphere) to lose heat.Also, in space there's those things called stars, which sort of pump out a lot of heat.A cryopod seems to operate on some weird sci fi principle to instantly make people sleep and be immune to aging.It should work on a xenomorph too.
>>214233891>>214233899could be roar or maybe backup call then Cutiellus realised a competitor xeno showed up that would take the damsel for itself denying it a host with DSL
>>214233928>it’s so simplelike your fucking brain it would seem
>>214232857she's indian. good booba. like the one in the pod that they keep showing.
>>214232626Sliding into her DMs be like
>>214233934>to lose heat requires some sort of substancewrong. you can lose heat in vaccum through radiation how do you think we get heat from the sun?>in space there's those things called starsirrelevant. most of space barely gets any heat as temperature exponentially drops the further you are from the star
everything that happened on the lab with eyelius and the 2 blood cockroaches made my blood boileverything was so stupid
>>214233684100% this, stack some double Ds on that alien bitch and build those thighs up some.They're already going with the weird lips so might as well smack that up to 11 as well.
>>214233676The irony. ..
>>214233863I felt like it was trying to talk / bargain / signal that it's intelligent (basically saying "Don't shoot") but it did look as if it were instead calling to the xenomorph.But then they fought so clearly not?
>>214233964I have my degree in astrophysics just delete this comment before I make a bigger fool of you.Bet you're also an anti vaxxer
I'm ok with this show but it has problems. It looks pretty good, a few of the characters are interesting, but I can't get away from how dumb the premise is and how jobbed out the xenomorph has been getting. So far it really feels like it might've been better if it wasn't Alien at all, and it was just a Weyland-Yutani spinoff.In another era I might've complained more, but TV has been so relentlessly mid for so long that I'm actually enjoying this.
Her name is Eye-leen
>>214233578it is dumb. but remember covid escaped from wuhan lab which presumably had extremely high safe guards. you have to suspend disbelief a bit for this show, maybe too much. didn't have to do it in alien/aliens anywhere near as much. that said this was a good episode.
>>214233980Yeah it was shitty; it would have maybe made sense if they were space truckers and one of them was like, being a retarded amateur exobiologist intending to sell the results to the company or something.But this is supposed to be an expert conducting experiments (in transit, bizarrely) for the company's super secret super important mission to recover aliens that are worth billions or trillions and basically represent a new paradigm shift in biological technology?
>>214234007>covid escaped from wuhan labHow's that brain worm RFK?
>>214233996My pet theory is that Hawley wanted to do a show about a spaceship crew taking alien (not xenomorph) species to Earth for study, while Ridley was pushing for another robot show. Some exec saw these on his desk and said why not both?
>>214233684Mfw instead of bringing you to an egg it fugs you and sticks facehugger larba up ur peehole.
>>214233494You should have known better. Some of us warned you it was gonna be horrendous. I knew it was gonna be garbage when they simply announced the series. My sixth sense has served me well. These last 5 years, when they announce something, I immediately know it's garbage -- conceived as garbage. I've not seen any of it. I just check the threads to confirm how shit it is.
This episode is where the show completely jumped the shark for me. I don't even wanna watch anymore. Utterly pointless filler with only two relevant plot points:>Boy Kavalier was in it all along>Morrow's backstoryFirst plot point is fucking retarded and retroactively ruins previous episodes. The second plot point didn't warrant an entire pointless flashback episode. Xeno looks awful and is retarded. New aliens are all boring. Sex scene was lame. The eye alien was amusing, but the fact that he didn't talk human language was disappointing, since he obviously connects to the victim's brain through the eye socket in order to control the entire fucking body. Weyland-Yutani being a bunch of weebs is cringe. Actors with the exception of Morrow and Kirsh are fucking awful. I don't know if my perception has been ruined by this shitty show, but now I find xenos to be lamer than ever. Predators are the coolest aliens, and I shall not watch any Disney slop to not ruin my perception of them.
>>214234023ill bite...where do you think covid came from ?
My wife.
>>214232428>So what's everyone's major problem with this episode?The cgi xeno looked like shit other than that it was good.
>>214233989its a show so pointless to over analyze but the look to the side indicates backup, if it were made towards Morrow it would be roar/defiance/threat making. if the fight was over the food/territory Cutiellus going for (what would normally be) the eye area of the xeno suggests it didn't know enough about the xeno to originally know its a threat instead of an ally? unless Cutiellus made a split second judgement that the xeno represented a superior host than the humans, and biting the neck wasn't fighting, it was to gain an entry point since xeno has no eyes.
>>214233752>Basically the baby Yoda of the Alien franchise.
>>214233996Same, adding the Alien just seems like a cheap promotable element. The show didn't need it, and they could have focused on the other specimens.
>>214234025Nobody's gives a fuck about your headcannon tripfag, and the show doesn't need you running Interference for it's shit writing, if you want don't want to come across as shill loose the trip code faggot.
>>214234048Proven to be from wet market
this show makes a good case for wiping out all insects/weird life forms. scratch that, all lifeforms. life is so disgusting.funny thing is, there are undoubtedly even worse life forms out there than this show depicts. like gigantic spiders that vomit millions of little spiders crawling around some hellish planet.
>>214234078>this show makes a good case for wiping out all insects/weird life formslike screen writers
>>214234059Does it have to be an actual eye? Or can it take over my japs eye?
>>214234078Suffer not the xenos to live.
>>214232428Episode 5 was like a 10/10 standalone Alien movie.
so the tick could have escaped anytime, but it only did it when it saw the spilled water?
>>214234036It’s genuinely retarded. If you’ve ever read a book, then there’s no way you could unironically love this show. It treats the viewer like they’re a literal mouth breathing idiot. They just serve you slop with pretty lights and say “deal with it”. It’s a huge waste of production design.
>>214234038The first point was pretty obvious, though.
>applies for job>goes through entire recruitment process>is successful>starts work on board the ship>still doesn't know what his job isWhat the fuck is this writing
>>214234114>>214234036How much do you get paid to write this
I call it now. Every Wendy episode will be trash..
>>214234107No, the scientist forgot to put on the lid.
>people complained that kavalier sending the hybrids to the crash site was retarded even for a split second decision and that where and how it crashed was very convenient>this episode comes out>people now claim a megacorp meddling in another megacorp's business is retardedyou fucking idiots are just mad you overreacted to an at the time unrevealed plot point
>>214234140This is literal bot/shill behavior. Shut the fuck up faggot
I must have missed how they explained boy genius had an inside man on a space mission that left 40 years before he was born
>>214234134Yeah, they went a little overboard with this retard.
>>214234162What you just said makes no sense. You’ve given away the fact that you’re a low iq normie hehe
>>214234171The show is going to win an Emmy and you will continue to be a disappointment to your parents.
>>214232866XEXO!
how do the xenos grow so fast and large right after bursting wtf man makes zero sense
Guys, I'm crying right now.Just looking at her picture makes me feel something strange inside. I guess you could call it "love". I'm in love with Wendy. I've lost interest in all girls, besides her.Wendy really is all I think about all day, every day. I really do cry myself to sleep at night thinking about how I'll never be with her. If only she knew I existed in this life, if only she knew my deep profound love for her. I know that will never happen though. That is the thought that makes me so sad when I look at her. I'll never be with her, but I'll continue to love her until the day I die.
>>214232782asburges
>>214234178kavalier is a clone or a consciousness in a synth. the old guy shadowing him is the original kavalier that sent the dude on the mission. they already foreshadowed this with Yutani daughter and Morrow.
>>214234134you don't interact with trades people do yousome of them are discount store savants because it doesn't matter if you can't be reading too good when you can shit out high quality welds eight hours a day
I thought that the lab scene with the eye escaping was gonna be the most retarded oneHowever in an incredible display of writing prowess whoever is shitting this turd delivers a devastating haymaker on the open surgery sceneFuck off
Its impressive how WY keeps getting the most unqualified people for their missionsAnd I dont even mean the brain damaged engie assistant>eating and drinking in the lab>with open dissections are inches away>while handling a fucking dead animal>and parasitesFirst thing that gets beaten into your skull when you go to the lab in university is you do not bring food into it must less eat in the lab, is that hoe a dropout or what
>>214234134>looks like his job is to shovel coal into the furnace>actually after the sabotage to a critical component of the ship his job is to rebuild an entire thing>is still deeply retarded and at no point do we see him at least be a savant or somethingI thought he was going to be the spy, like do the old Hans Gruber "I'm not actually retarded" card
>>214234145why focus on the spilled water then? watch it again, the bug only started escaping after it saw the drops of water, it needs water to procreate.
>>214234222>Grabs tiny nymph tick>It shits out enough allergens (poison?) to kill you in a few secondsLol
Apologize.
>carelessness in a lab after years of routine work?
>>214234246defense mechanism of aerolized xeno acid
>>214233674>>214233748Weyland UTAH ni, it was a forshadowing that the alien belong to them
>>214234194My parents love me. Keep projecting you dweeb. Emmys haven’t been relevant since the early 2000s. It’s okay if you like the show, it just means you’re a simpleton
>>214234271Why would a completely unrelated organism have Xeno acid?
>xenomorph fucks around for no reason instead of just killing the woman>somehow she outruns him multiple timeswhy the FUCK was he so slowalso they really overdid it with the crew member incompetence angle. We can be certain next episode will be better because nothing can be worse
>>214234007>a disease that doesn't exist escaped??
>>214234266yeah at this point that dude has no faults and is a perfect example of a smart sceintist
>>214232626She's fucking retarded, all she had to do was contain and she lets the nig scientist keep fucking around with specimens for no reason. The mission objective is to deliver them alive and she's starving them for what, lulz?
>>214234100>>214234078
>>214234283how is it unrelated? didn't they all come from the same place or get engineered from the same species?
>>214234222>"He's losing a lot of blood!">better not give him a blood transfusion>macroscopic grossly visibly evident little blorps squirming on his blood vessels >don't sedate him or anything or even lower his body temperature>worm the size of a peanut somehow braps out a debilitating fart cloud that fills the room, knocking down two adult humans I know it's retro-future 70s tech but like, c'mon they can't give him a transfusion or even stabilize him with IV fluids?If "ice them until we can fix it" is a standard procedure, the med lab doesn't have a cryochamber that someone can be put in then wheeled into the main cryo thing?
>>214234222Both scenes made no sense and were dumb in the context of the episode and show they took place in. :/
>>214234287it was toying with her
>>214234303The Emperor is right about everything
>>214234134its a dei race swap of a black person in a white person body
big ass ship, and i mean big as fuckthey happen to have the shootout in front of the labGIMME A FUCKING BREAK
>>214233022>Warns about the leeches>Knocks the XO before she can draw the xenomorph>Morrow bangs loudly attracting it anyway>tries to warn Morrow by imitating the alarm sounds that the Xenomorph is BEHIND HIM>when that doesn't work, throws the fuck down, bites and fucking facehugs the xenomorphOcellus is some sort of sentient being whose purpose is containment of other aliens or he's based enough to protect humans.
>>214234246it's not that far fetched when you consider the fact that bombardier beetles are very much real and they spray boiling acid from their asshole
Imagine if you were caught by a xenomorph and it roughed you up a bit then dragged you off and glued you to a wall and it tried to scare you by hissing in your face and bearing it's teeth but then you blow a raspberry at it and it turns away in disgust then you say hey hey and it looks at you and you blow another raspberry at it and then it thinks ya know this guy's alright and he lets you go.This is what I expect in an upcoming episode.
>>214233178>they almost never do it with menI felt like it had some tension with Hermit when it was pinning him down
>>214232626that was beyond retarded
>>214234025My pet theory is that you are a Disney shill who has contributed to the fact that the general population is so discombobulated they have no idea which end is up anymore and therefore they haven’t clocked the fact that Noah Hawley is a retarded hack, which should have been apparent to anyone about halfway through season one of Fargo.
>We need to wake up the rest of the crewWasn't there just one girl left in stasis at this point? Also what happened to her?
>>214234281That's just rude and you're coming across as a typical 4chan chud. Maybe take a step back and look at yourself and how your words can effect others before you shoot them off into the world. There's no need to be hateful and antagonistic. Grow up.
>>214233271Some. But most hid in the corpse that Prodigy took to his island.It certainly is getting nuked to "contain contamination" at the end of the season.
>>214234312Yes, too bad he sacrificed his humanity for mankind to save it, which paradoxically caused the Horus heresy due to bad parenting.
>>214234332Yes, but those just hurt your skin a bit. They don't make you die in a minute.
>>214234236>I thought he was going to be the spy, like do the old Hans Gruber "I'm not actually retarded" cardI had the same thought honestly, when it turned out to be Petrovich I was like "who??"
>>214233372Jews
I would like to publicly apologize to the plot of the videogame>Aliens Dark DescentI have seen before in these very threads as well as threads on /v/ praising the game while criticizing the plot as the>most retarded alien's franchise "story" everI know see the error of my ways after watching this episode of a bona fide big ass budget tv show.I shall strive to do the better in the future, may you all forgive me.
>>214233660they could go 2 weeks without food so doubtfully
>>214232428this show just gets dumber and dumber
>>214233447>sleeping in cryptoThey got rugged
>>214234352I do not care about you, you are not a real person. Get off 4chan, I’m trying to help you grow up.
I can forgive the individuals being retarded dipshits but the containment vessel for an alien creature shattering when it hit the floor like some wine bottle made me laugh at how stupid it all was. That said, best episode basically because Morrow is decent and he's not sharing his screentime with an annoying pajeet android.
>>214233578>chief science womanWas she even? Why the fuck was she starving leeches when they were supposed to be delivered alive?!
>>214234356It's ok alpharius is on the case
>>214232782Kind of baffling he wasn't a synth
>>214234372what is the story of the game?
>>214233674>cunt is too bust to do her only fucking job>not too busy to pour ground on a cryopod>in a fucking spaceshipDo you even realize how bad any dust in a spaceship is?! Fuck.
>>214233641wtf we NEED more pajeet immigrants now
Wait so there are at least dozens of ticks in the ship and somehow not a single one managed to make it to the city?
>>214233745Ocellus escaped because she forgot to close the latch on the canister. Or check the BIG RED LIGHT that came on because she forgot.
>>214232782>loses his composure when confronted with the AlienIs he the irl version of an internet tough guy?
>>214234390Also the general character writing and acting is shit. The dialogue in Alien and Aliens felt naturalistic - especially Alien. Nowadays television and movies rarely, if ever, pull of what was once standard. Now it's a fucking feat to do that. Whether it's Aliens: Earth or shit like The Bear, they always fucking fail via their subpar writing, directing, and acting
>incompetent DEI hires ruin your mission and shipWhat did they mean by this?
Quiet!
I love this show!
I swear when nu-Hollywood wants to have an English character that isn't a posho, they always default to that fucking disgusting London accent. It's ear rape to hear it spoken.
>>214233863Xenomorph got attracted by Morrow's banging on the grate. He knocked out the XO so she wouldn't attract attention of xeno.She was trying to tell the nig "behind you" by copying the alarm sound.She's straight up the only person on the ship working to actually preserve human life.
I'm not looking forward to the next episodes so much after this. It all seems so stupid. >The glass containers that can be opened from inside.>The alien being clumsy again>The eyeball wanting to fight the xeno>Evidence of the guy speaking to kavalier is just some recording the security guy can accessThe writing is terrible.
Ngl, during the mess hall scene where the crew were so unruly the captain told them to shut up at least 4 times, I was like I understand Morrow nowbut even then it turned out Morrow did actually try to save the situation and only let the crew die when it was hopeless
>>214232626Same energy
>>214232786It's a 65 years long mission. Only retards and other degenerates would agree to this.
>>214234452what do you mean, the eyeball is the best part of the show
How did the space cucumber end up in the corridor?
>>214234361I was talking more about the idea of a small bug being able to vent a surprisingly large amount of reactive chemicalseven the xeno blood is acid so a tick spraying ebola gas isn't that far fetched
>>214234424Yeah it’s pretty bad. Takes you out of it. It’s a shame because there are aspects of the shows that are good but they’re ruined by poor essentials
>>214234318Isn't he scottish or something?
>>214234442
How much do they pay you to samefag and shill against this show?This board needs ids
>>214234402a big ass colonial marine ship gets trapped on a planet in the early stages of alien infestation (due to WYutani fuckery obviously).You then find out that there is a cult that worship the aliens and that they can implant a device on their chest with a chestburster on it "suspended" that makes the aliens consider them part of the hive/not attacking themLeader of the cult has a girl connected to the "hive" through a mix of tech and mind psyonic shit.It so happens that the dad of said girl is the marine on charge of the stranded ship and through their shared dna he can also sort of sense the aliens and shitThe last mission is rescuing the girl on a massive underground city with old ass school aliens design (think HR Giger more than prometheus) in which some giant race used to live but eventually died however the cult was able to breed a giant alien off the corpse/last giant alive.Its a legit mess, i skipped a lot of it.Game is a banger tho
>>214234472It sprouts legs and walks around.The writing is so shit.
>>214234474It only really when an actor is charismatic enough, so basically Olyphant in this show and I guess the Morrow guy. Everyone else from the hideous mutant playing Kavalier to the obvious fag commie playing Hermit to the nepobaby playing Wendy is dogshit.
>>214234486Why would people shill against a show? It makes more sense that people would shill FOR a show. Idiot.
>>214234134>how do we show he's a working class poorfag from bongland? ah yes, excellent idea hawley you sly dog, i'll make him clinically retarded
>competing networks don't have Chinese bot farms shillOk SAAAARNeed id and flags
>>214234517The DEI science engineer looked dumber
>>214227699lmao they're dead
>>214233646>"So like the first film is actually metaphor for ending the White race"
If you like this show you are literally plebbit
What happened to the big boob lady in stasis?
>>214234553died in the crash
Why did eye thing seem to call out?
>>214234537>black science lady is retarded>Morrow, a man, usurps the useless female captain rather than her girlbossingDamn I guess the woke is dead claims from Americans weren't wrong
>>214234553Teng hands typed this post
>>214234553she's not a lady, she's a ukranian subhuman
>the strange synth stares at the girl cause horny>he smokes>he screams in terror when the alien attacks himSo they basically are totally human except more strength, white fluid blood, some ways to interface with machines, and being immortal?
>>214233755yes, slava ukraini
>>214234582he doesn't know...
>>214234561deez
This is an actual comment on Reddit
>>214234536Take your meds. “Oh no! People/bots hate this alien show, I guess I’ll cancel my subscription to the entire streaming service and subscribe to paramount plus so I can watch Landman, since bots love that one! Oh wait, I already subscribe to every streaming platform. Doesn’t matter.” Makes no fucking sense, you are a bot trying to ruin conversations.
>>214234582>the synthuhm...
>>214234266>human tries to touch an alien cobra after defensive gestureRetarded>robot touches one after no defensive gestureMakes senseGuess that's why Prometheus was DOA
>>214234587...i-i don't k-know?
>>214232782Me in the reflection
>>214234591
>>214234591Well it is the best episode so far, but rest is cringe. Hawley is retard.
>>214234593>cancel my subscriptionI don't pay for himovies
>>214234449If I understood you- Cutiellus was trying to warn Morrow like it tried to warn the woman in the lab - it makes sense, presumably as a competition strategy to keep the food for itself.
>>214234594Oh he isn't one? I could have sworn in the first episode they were giving him shit being an off putting weirdo machine
>>214234591Should he have said>APOLOGIZE?
>>214234499Wtf insane lore
>>214234573>year 4 of the ten day special military operation
>>214234607Her tits are huge so it's an appropriate response to seeing them.
>>214234553Crashing the statsis with no survivers
She's the only good part of this show
>>214234631>the only to ever say this was a us generalbrainwashed retard
what happened to the dozens of ticks?
>>214234622He's just an autistic Asian guy.
>>214233578you forgot that alien movies are all about people acting like retards
>>214234630>>214234499Congrats you just ripped off Genestealer lore
>>214234655>she
>>214232543You mean like every other alien movie where nothing happens until you're halfway through? You're a big dummy you know that?
>>214234611Beep boop adjusting programming to appear more realistic beep beep boop
>>214234657>losing Kherson was part of the plan!>Russia wanted to be bogged down and trying to find a way out nowtop cope lmao
>>214234665My mistake. This adds on even further to my observation here >>214234563 with the creepy incel that wants to rape being a chink
>>214234672Yeah very true
>65 year trip>Still same age when they returnEven with Cryo it's impossible, I don't get it?
>>214234672Yeah there are similarities, always despised genestealer cults on wh40k too>>214234659probably died on the water not being able to reach a host since the smartest brit alive only drank a handful
>>214234673
>ship called maginot>totally fails as first line of defense against alien parasites the way the Maginot Line failed in the 40sI bet Hawley thought they were being so fucking clever when they decided to give the ship that name - I can damn near picture the sois squealing and soi facing over this bit of trivia
>>214234708They are only awake for a few days at a time.
>>214233995dont forget your booster faggot
>>214234573Found the jeet
>>214234713>probably died on the waterWe see dozens of ticks escaping the body of the brit.
>>214234708i assume cryo also slows aging massively, so they only naturally age when they are awakewe dont really know how long the mission took on "active" time
>>214234659They hid inside the guy who got headshotted. And that corpse was taken to the Prodigy island.
>>214234420>Or check the BIG RED LIGHT that came on because she forgot.Not to mention the nonstop beeping from a red light.
>>214234716>Chimp boozer
>>214234287>why the FUCK was he so slowBecause narrow corridors with lots of turns. He can't get any momentum.
>>214234731after the surgery? i must have missed iti thought he might have only had taken a dozen or so out of which only 6 or so were able to reach a blood vesselsome other anon already brought up that point that the New Siam city might be crawling with those ticks already
>>214233863>if it was calling the other xeno for backup why did they fight?Did you forget that Cutiellus tried to warn the nigress?
Last nights episode was pretty good. I wonder if they moved episodes out of order.
>>214234740>>214234762After the surgery you see dozens of ticks crawling outside of the body
>>214234769Apparently it was a distraction so that she doesn't see the tick doing its thing.
>delicate 65 year mission>uhm, better tell our chief of security that his daughter died in a fire
>>214234769I did, my bad. Wish they would explore Cutiellus's motivation more, instead of these flyvision shots, best creature of the show so far.
>>214234778we have to accept that those smaller ones didnt survive and died when they sealed/vented that room, or died on the crash or whateveri dont think the show wants us to care about those ticks beyond the adult ones we already saw on the early episode and the one on the headshot wound
>Ocellus is the smartest dude on the entire shipI love him more and more.
>>214234812Don't misgender her, chuddie.
Why do people in these threads try and act tough
>show has massive cast>ONLY morrow and kirsh are any goodlmao
>>214234800>Wish they would explore Cutiellus's motivation morethey 100% willmaybe not in this "season" or whatever but they are spending a lot of time on her, they must have real plans for it>justified saying that it is a very intelligent species
I'm actually impressed at how disgusting the Boy actor is to look at. I hate his face even more than Alex Lawther's face, and I *really* hate Alex Lawther's face lol
>>214234812>him
>>214234840Main actress is great too even if the writing is shit
>>214234857It's an Anglo thing. Here we can see how the Anglo compares to a Norman Chad.
>>214234815>>214234861Fine. She's my fave still.
>>214234769>>214234800>Cutiellusfuck you thats eye bro. eye bro gonna get a synth body and fuck shit up. aren't you eye bro
>>214234861>we need to call him her because the retarded black "scientist" referred to him as herngmi
>>214234822Both are generic and bland.Morrow is a soulless retard with nothing to lose with only "muh loyalty" left.Kirsh is a soulless David clone who acts only based on the "for the lulz xd" mentality.
>>214234840what I am also interested to know is the time with the cat, why the cat was all messed up, does it imply Cutiellus needs to constantly jump host? does Cutiellus consume their host? Or can it settle into one, say Boy Kavalier for example, and stay there comfy, undetected. Making a break with the traditional xeno lifecycle parasite everyone is familiar with and more like creature from The Thing.
>>214232626>trips her instead of instakilling her with any of the ways it can do that>she outruns the xeno starting from a prone positionXenomorph bros...
>>214234857What's with Gen z and the wide eyes
>>214234857Lawtner is an anglo, this guy is a kike.
>>214232713And unlike the 80s the suit looks like shit
>>214234726>yeah im thinking this is gonna make me look smart in the onions video essays
>>214234591go back faggot
>>214234928Microplastic and malnutrition
Adding Boy Retard to this episode just completely ruined it, and at the same time ruined the entire series too.
>>214235005agreed
>>214235005it also makes the previous episodes pointless since he knew about the ship to begin with
>>214235005Would have made more sense for it to be his bald goon pretending to be acting independently, to give the mutant trillionaire some plausible deniability if that footage ever came to light>look guys, Jeeves was acting alone to curry my favour, I'm totally innocent hehehehe
>>214234934How did we lose suit making technologyTech is supposed to always get better
>>214235005Michael Smiley is known for doing cheeky chappie, gruff manner characters. For his character to work the slow apprentice needed to be a real babe in the wood so exposition could be dumped for the audience.But they really over cooked the apprentices stupidity to try and 3D the character and generate sympathy, same with the Indian heritage synth, but it falls flat both times.
>>214235005that boytard himself hops on the holo with this guy is fucking ridiculous
>>214234077>t.
This is the best TV show ever and this is the best thread ever too
>>214235112He wasn't talking about the low iq anglo mechanic
>>214235123Literally me
>>214234857he's like modern day woody allen and timothée chalamet hybrid
If Ocellus took control over the assistant engineer or the xenobiologist the average IQ of the crew wouldve been increased
Imagine a 60 year old man on facetime with Mark Zuckerburg asking if he can have some of that new fangled immortality tech he somehow heard about. like what the fuck
>>214234927Why would it instakill her? It wants to rape her and transform her into an egg
>>214234684Nobody asked for a bad recreation of the first Alien movie in the middle of a TV series.
The New monster had been leaked
>>214235163More like a young Vincent Cassel
>>214235168Zucc at least wouldnt call him a dumb fuck to his face(he calls his users that in private only), boy retard kept being insulting and gave him no kind of ensurance when Petrovich asked what if he dies and yet he still decided>hmmm yes I think I'll betray all my coworkers to benefit this kid
>>214235038>if that footage ever came to lightMorrow uploaded it, along with the rest of his memories, to WY.
>>214234958Ooh you're so tough
>>214234077
>>214235234Face blindness is a symptom of autism. If you don't get a primal instinct of revulsion when looking at the Boy Retard actor, your bloodline is weak.
>>214235268NTA but as a non-Angloid Bong that is handsome but humble roots (ancestors were miners, nurses, butchers, etc) I honestly find it irritating when I see rich and famous and privileged Bong actors look hideous. My societal 'betters' can at least have the decency to not look like hideous subhumans (so someone like Henry Cavill gets a pass despite his lack of charisma).
>>214234591xe is right. it's a great episode
>>214235328>non-Angloid Bongpajeet
>>214235328Jesus Christ, bongs aren't humans. You do realize that this class bullshit is a thing of the 19th century, roight?
>>214234452You forgot the part where the glass containers are breakable, considering they're meant to contain biohazardous aliens.
>>214235352Non-Angloid Bong = non-English Briton, i.e. Welsh and Highland Scottish roots.
>>214235005How do these ships have such fast communications tech, anyway?Also yes, but the whole Peter Pan analogy shouldn't have been implemented in the first place too.
>>214235328England is the only country where the men look better than the women
>>214235354>You do realize that this class bullshit is a thing of the 19th century, roight?It's still ingrained, anon. If you're born to a higher station you're deemed superior forever. And it feels like a hell of a slap in the face to have your 'betters' be fucking hideous compared to you.
>>214235401>willingly servile peasant>but it'd be ok if my oppressors were prettierJesus Christ, you deserve to get replaced by fucking jeets and pakis.
>>214235388They tend to go to seed around university due to the drinking. Their bodies can't seem to handle it way men's bodies can. Guys will gain or lose some pounds at university for the most part, but I never noticed a consistent trend of them gaining noticeable weight like the girls
>>214235421>t. Boy Kavalier
>>214233677
>>214235421No, retard, I'm expressing resentment over it and glibly stated it's even more of a slap in the face when the people you're told are your betters also look like hideous mutants, because that makes it so obviously a farce.
>>214235373I'm sure they mention they're only 2 weeks from Earth during the discussion of going back into Cryo, but why would they even bother at that point?
NEW>>214235538NEW>>214235538NEW>>214235538
>>214235529It was 4 months.
>>214235401Just move to the US the economic situation is better and everyone here will think you're cool if you have an accent
