Masuiyama Edition>Banzuke:http://sumodb.sumogames.de/Banzuke.aspxhttps://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoBanzuke/index/>Fight Schedule & Results:https://www.sumo.or.jp/EnHonbashoMain/torikumi/1/1/>Some sumo links and how to watch live:https://rentry.org/uwbgc88d>Heya Youtube channels:>Futagoyamahttps://www.youtube.com/@futagoyama-sumofood>Isegahamahttps://www.youtube.com/@isegahamabeya>Kisehttps://www.youtube.com/@kisebeya>Tatsunamihttps://www.youtube.com/@tatsunami-beya>Tamanoihttps://www.youtube.com/@sumo-tamanoibeya>Hidenoyamahttps://www.youtube.com/@hidenoyama>Oshimahttps://www.youtube.com/@oshimabeya>Minatohttps://www.youtube.com/@湊部屋どすこいチャンネル>Shikoroyamahttps://www.youtube.com/@shikoroyamabeya>Asakayamahttps://www.youtube.com/@浅香山部屋公式チャンネル>Takasagohttps://www.youtube.com/@TAKASAGOSUMOTEAM高砂部屋Previous thread:>>232989
>232989
How long before the JSA nukes the heya channels? I give it six months....
sumosmy judo club just started a sumo session once a week, im going to try it out.what should i know as a first timer?
>>235281You can do basically any takedown you want (that's not a sacrifice throw obviously). You'll grow more mindful of your in-ring position. Have fun.
>>235281YOU'RE GONNA DIE NIGGA AHHHH
>>2352512 more weeks or until someone does something retarded, as always.
Everyone, send Koga your power!
>>235281Watch your head on the tachi-ai, very easy way to get concussions and broken noses if you're a beginner. They still happen in makuuchi.
>>236184My boy NEEDS to show something this bashoBut the way he's been getting rekt by the new kids is making me lose what little hope I had
>>236187Koga gets discouraged too easily. He needs someone really bad to train against. He'd be able to rack up more wins and confidence, and he'd be able to try new things.
>>236188If we look at it optimistically maybe we can say the new recruits just have decent potential Shunta seems strong at least, I think he'll actually do the best of the three brothers, like Wakatakakage.
>>236193for later
I wish /xs/ had moderators
>>236196If there were mods here, then every sumo thread would be a danfreak avatar thread, because he makes new ones at random.
>>236196Be the change you want to see. When you see an objectionable post, reply to it saying:>As the official moderator of /xs/, I have judged this post to be a bad and unworthy post. Everyone, please ignore it. Further replies to this post risk being judged in turn as bad posts.
>>236198>>236199I wish /xs/ had competent moderators
>>236200As the official moderator of /xs/, I have judged this post to be a bad and unworthy post. Everyone, please ignore it. Further replies to this post risk being judged in turn as bad posts.
>>236201Monoii desu ka
>>236204ええぇ、ただ今の協議についてご説明いたします.行事軍配は、ええぇ、西方の236201に上がらいましたが、ボケではないかと物言いがつき、協議した結果、ボケとみて236204の勝ちと決定いたします.
Calling it now, Onosato 13-2 yusho3 in a rowhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7kd2MfgZ7i0
I'm glad /xs/ doesn't have moderators
>>236207Not in July. Hoshoryu takes it in a 12-3 playoff. (Onosato is not part of the playoff).
>>236184Koga doesn't want to get stronger at all. If he did he'd just lift weights nonstop in the afternoons and wind up as a Takerufuji-esque cube. Actions speak louder than words.>>236188Nobody but himself can truly light a fire under his ass. Shingitai, nigga. Koga is lacking in everything: spirit, technique, and body.
>>236210Koga is the hero of a sumo-themed SoL comedy, and has mysteriously and upsettingly found himself in the real world.
>>236207Would be pretty fucking nuts since that'd put him at a 50% yusho rate since hitting Makuuchi 10 basho prior. It took Hakuho 13 basho in Makuuchi to win his first.
is this basedjak materialto be actually on-topic, i've been really enjoying hearing and reading people seethe over this banzuke; takayasu chuddies stay winning
>>236219I mean, Takayasu was dropped into the #8 spot which was M1e last banzuke, so eh? Honestly this is all Wakatakakage's fault.
>>236204>>236206
>>236204Imagine being the shinpan next to him.>God can you just fucking not
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zL4DHwXkNLI&t=951sabsolutely insane thug matta in Kirinji vs Toyokuni, July 1967
>>236237it's funny how the tachiai got worse during and after ww2 and had to be corrected by Wakanohana, forcing rikishi to put both hands down and not just run into each other while standing.
>implying the running start is worse
>>236241It's not very dignified, is it?
>>236245Neither are the silly games some rikishi play. Just go! Mattanashi!
>>236247Why not just have the gyoji shout out when to go?
...
>>236237Fun one at the end.
>>236248That’s how they do it in amateur sumo and it just leads to bullshit staredowns.
We need more traffic on /xs/. I can't stand watching all those dead /sumo/ threads on catalog
>>236257This is our boardEveryone else is just visiting.
>>236253loves me some FujinokawaIncidentally - somehow, this Fujinokawa is not the one who died recently; it was his successor.
Oyakata channel visits the new arena in Nagoyahttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QoAIi2oHC7E
Y1e next stop for Onosato.
>>236253It's like Taiho was play fighting with his son.
>>236284I can't tell if he does these faces on purpose or if he's just incredibly un-photogenic.
>>236290Taiho had a big advantage over the rest of the banzuke because he was half Ukrainian.
>>236292I'm glad to hear the Ukrainian part of him was being watered down.
>>236292It's very impressive that he did so well with such a handicap.
>>236292kashiwado was taller and heavier and not half of anything.
>>236291
>>236284I like that tie.
>>236291Faces?
>>236311How come he rides a girl's bike?
>>236319He's not.
>>236320its a girls bikeura is a tranny
>>236324Kek
>>236321Girls ride bikes with low or no crossbar so they don't have to show everyone their pantsu when they get on or off it. Rikishi wearing robes have a similar issue so ride the same bikes.
Me? Yeah I'm a thrusterLots of slaps and pushes
Reminder that Onosato's master and his master's master both won their Yokozuna debut basho.
>>236339I hope his Yokozuna career follows their pattern....
>>236340Fortunately Kisenosato won't let Onosato be as stupid as Kisenosato.
Has Teru ever smiled?
Please god let Kotoeiho go 8-0 so he faces tougher competition because Kotoeiho v Abi doing simultaneous shiko would be the most viral shit.
>>236344
>>236346>Haha they made me stand on boxes because they're too weak to hold me up!>AND THEY PUT MIDORI AT THE FRONT TO MAKE ME LOOK BIGGER LMAOOOOOOI think any of us would be laughing.
>OnosatoI believe he truly is HIM.>WTKNo reason to think he isn't capable of 12+ now that Ozeki is in striking distance.>AbiSanyaku capable.>TakerufujiOut of the joi he should go back to bulldozing.>KusanoAll board the hype train.>AtaminI swear to fucking god if this fat fuck doesn't start performing.>Sub - RogaI'm doing it for Koga.I have zero regrets.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=li2s1O9XPrwSLOPPA TIME
>>236341Lul, savage but trueI miss Harumafuji <3
>>236348>I swear to fucking god if this fat fuck doesn't start performingAtamifuji and Oho are in the same category: guys that are physically gifted and fully capable but missing something in their mental conditioning. Prime Shodai was like that too. The inconsistent effort fucks with my chi
>>236355It's astonishing that men like that have been able to make it all the way to the top division (to Ozeki, in Shodai's case) while seeming to lack any sort of competitive nature.
>>236355ATF has arthritis in his hip
>>236355>Atamifuji and Oho are in the same categoryExcept Atami has been in the best stable and has received training from multiple Yokozunas while Oho is the only halfway decent wrestler in his shitty stable and his oyakata didn’t even make maegashira in his career.
>>236358So does your mom but she still fucks like she's being electrocuted. What's A-bomb's excuse?
>>236364Slopslurpers are eating good today!
>>236353Same, bro...
>>236365It's pure comfort just like the original slop, the sloppy joe
Let's all do better together ok bros
>>236369>to acknowledge mistakes and genuinely express remorseYeah, this list isn't going to work out here. We need our own list of daily attitudes.
>>236364
>>236370>to acknowledge other anons mistakes and make him genuinely express remorse
>>236212Everyone says Hakuho got lucky that sumo was down compared to the 80s but onosato is 10x luckier because 90 percent of makuuchi are shitters. We even have ozeki and Yokozuna jobbers now.
latest script just got leaked
>>236383she's fat and gross btw
>>236383>still expecting Takkers to excelYeah I wouldn't make that bet. Not based on what I've seen in the last few months.
>>236383this guy says aonishiki isn't the strongest wrestler in sumo, which is wrong. he is the most muscular and strongest wrestler in sumo
>>236388stop posting
>>236385>she's fat and gross btw>/sumo/
>>236386Takerufuji is destined to be the Daieisho of Makuuchi.
Onosato managed to break into the Sanyaku because he had a top quality stablemaster in Kisenosato. Takerufuji had to settle for useless shitters like As*hifuji and T*runofuji.
>>236388Some ppl find Danposting so triggering, wonder what it is about Dan that aggravates their onions. Anyone have any good guesses?
>>236400Bit thick, are we?
>>236400>yell about pancakes constantly 24/7>everyone tells you to shut up>you conclude people have a problem with pancakes
>>236401Stop replying to obvious bait.
>>236404Does this count?
The time has come for Trannytame to zensho. Get ready for the start of the greatest zuna run of all time.
>>236422I expect Babutame to top out at komusubi
thoughts on this?
>>236431I hope they never promote him lol
>>236431All the elders were ready to give Aonishiki the the komusubi promotion but then they saw how obnoxious the Danposter the and decided to deny him the rank out of disgust
>>236435chin balls
The Russian bots were successful in making us hate Aonishiki
Wakatakakage visited Dan@Ajigawa stables
I'll never be a sumo but I really wanna do their work-outs.
>>236441You can do shiko anywhere. Just like a *rikishi.
>>236442Its not the same without a crew of low rank shitters to cook and serve me
>>236446Quit edging and just finish yourself off already
When will Ochirsaihan enter?
>>236453I can't remember his name but there was a complete beast going toe-to-toe with Makuuchi guys. Pretty sure he was training with Isegahama guys.
>>236453He is supposedly officially registered as a pre-hatsu-dohyou "trainee" and has been for several years. Akinomaki said before that>Daiseizan lived at the heya for 3 years before he was at the examSo it would seem ridiculous wait times before entry have some precedent. That said, there is a small chance there may be some technicality bullshit going on about 'the number of foreigners at Isegahama' and the NSK doesn't want to let him debut before they determine whether or not Seihakuhou counts as Isegahama's foreigner. He shouldn't, because that's not how it's worked in the past, but this is a unique case. Pic related is straight-up a photo of Ochil on the Isegahamabeya website, yet he's not listed under their Member page.
>>236455Teru becoming Oyakata means the *spit* gaijin slot is free now right? I guess a 30+ member beya is always gonna be a bit rough on that slot.
>>236454Yeah, that's him. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Qi9c4pPqDA&t=657shttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xT0r8dqhVSM
>>236456>Teru becoming Oyakata means the *spit* gaijin slot is free now right? That's what everyone was waiting for. Foreigners are supposed to spend 6 months as trainees to learn Japanese culture before being allowed to enter properly, but Ochil's been around for years. It's been about 5 months and 2 weeks since Teru retired, so if they started the "official" trainee timer at the time of Teru's retirement, he wouldn't have been eligible for this upcoming basho but will be for Aki.
>>236455They should just send them all back to mongolia and be done with it
Teru will become Chairman one day and Akebono rolling over in his grave will measure on the richter scale.
>>236460It's a good thing we have a replacement scale that doesn't top out, made for just such occasions
>>236460Kisenosato is Japanese and raised a Japanese yokozuna. Terunofuji will never become chairman unless Kisenosato dies in a tragic accident involving an inexplicable herd of wild horses.
>>236464Shikihide could've raised Onosato to Yokozuna lmao. Sadly Japan cares more about performative bullshit than reality, so Kisenosato will become Chairman because his stable lucked out in recruiting Onosato.
>>236465Everyone cares more about actual performance than what might have been. It doesn't matter if you got a massive head start, a win is a win.
>>236466I don't think you understand what "performative" means.
>>236467No amount of snarky comments can obscure your actual position. You think the Japanese are upsettingly different for acting this way, when in reality it happens everywhere. There's no country or work culture on the planet that works in the way you seem to want them to. Everywhere you go, you will see people being rewarded for doing what's expected of them, for not rocking the boat, and for being the right sort of person. This is right and good and ordinary.
>>236469So you're essentially saying that the JSA Chairman should be picked by complete luck?
>>236470You're really reaching with that one. Kisenosato will be the chairman eventually because he ticks all the right boxes, which is the most important thing. Maybe you're right, and any oyakata could have taken Onosato to the top. But the fact is that they didn't and Kisenosato did. It doesn't matter if that was because of luck or because of superlative coaching talent, the only thing that matters in this case is that Kisenosato now has an accolade that will be very hard, if not impossible, for any potential rivals for the chairman position to top. It certainly means that any foreign elder like Terunofuji is completely out of the running.
>>236471I can't tell if you agree with me or not.
>Tamashoho has won the Juryo yusho three timesLmao that's such a shit award at that point. At least Takerufuji and Kusano have good reasons for winning multiple. I'm actually gonna check if anyone's topped that.So Masurao won his 5th Juryo yusho March 1990. He actually won his last two back to back because he only got a +5 promotion with his 12-3 at J7w. No one else has won more than 4.
>>236458Is that 6 months a firm rule? I've never heard about it before. Any more info on that would be appreciated.
>>236488"Rules" in sumo are about as firm as Akiseyama's belly.
>>236490>ole iron gutSo they're firm?
>>236490>AkiseyamaDamn, you just made me sad about his retirement all over again. Dude had amazing footwork that I don't think most people appreciate. <3
>>236488It's more like they have a set curriculum that ends up taking 6 months.
>>236496And this is outside of Sumo school?
>>236494Makes me wonder about the quirks and minor talents rikishi of the past had. I didn't watch them fight and it's not people the sort of thing people typically record. Appreciate the lads while you can.
>>236497This is concurrent with sumo school.
>>236500So foreigners do Sumo school before Maezumo? That seems strange.
>>236504A foreigner is a bigger investment than a random kid from a local high school.
>>236505Well sure, I just hadn't heard about this alternate timeline until now. I always thought it was: entrance exam, then sumo school for the first six months starting in the month of your maezumo basho. Makes sense though.
>>236504>>236506Sumo school -> exam -> maezumo, for everyone. Foreigners have extra curriculum as part of sumo school that makes it take longer for them, and an extra two months after the exam before maezumo to ensure they're acclimated whereas domestic Japanese can do maezumo immediately after their exam.
>>236509But that can't be right. The newer Futagoyama recruits were talking about going to sumo school well after they were already on the banzuke.
>>236510held back for being bad
>>236510Okay you're right I got things mixed up.Entrance exam -> maezumo. Domestic can do maezumo immediately after passing the exam, while foreigners have to wait a tournament.After passing maezumo is sumo school. Six months for domestic, a year for foreigners, but this is while being active lower division wrestlers.
>>236512Thank you. Out of curiosity, where did you hear about this?
>>236511Kikuchi would never!
>>236344Not for a while
New Chris video today
the forbidden kimarite........
I'm so fucking depressed right now so I'm glad sumo is starting next week. Thank you for reading my blog
The new Gunning article mentions that Onosato is the first yokozuna to debut as yokozuna-ozeki since Chiyonofuji
>>236531>yokozuna-ozekiWhat does that mean though
>>236533There must be two ozeki on the banzuke - or at least two men filling the spots for O1W and O1E. If there is only one man ranked at ozeki, the yokozuna (or the lowest-ranked yokozuna, in this case the most recent promotee) is designated as a yokozuna-ozeki to balance the banzuke. It doesn't have any effect on pay or privileges. In theory, if Kotozakura loses his ozeki rank and nobody replaces him, both yokozuna would be designated as yokozuna-ozeki. The reason it's done this way as opposed to a sekiwake being temporarily deputised as a sekiwake-ozeki is that a yokozuna is really just an ozeki with special extra privileges. Ozeki is by far the older rank, historically speaking, and the concept of a yokozuna is much more recent than most people think, which is why Onosato is only the 75th.
>>236533Whenever there's fewer than two ozeki on the banzuke, the lowest yokozuna is designated "yokozuna-ozeki" because there must always be two ozeki. It's just a formality so they don't have to promote an undeserving sekiwake.
>>236533it isn't significant. also lmao at the fag who wrote a wall of text about something so meaningless.
>>236536>wall of textphoneposter detected
>>236534>>236535Shit, I didn't even realise we only have one ozeki now. Lower sanyaku need to get their shit together.
>>236534Good effort post>>236536Eat a dick, fucknugget
>>236538WTK has a shot at ozeki if he repeats his 12 win performance. The other two sekiwake will probably need to wait until September unless they do something crazy like a 14-1 Y.
>>236536cease to exist you stupid newfag.
collection
>>236547Surprisingly lacking in cum stains
>>236547
>>236547Based punished Aonishiki will go 11-4 again and continue his climb to zuna.
>>236488>Is that 6 months a firm rule? I've never heard about it before. Any more info on that would be appreciated.There are a bunch of articles obliquely referring to the 6 months as a trainee for foreigners, but I don't know how much of the official NSK word on that is public. Seems to have started in 2018, which is around the time of Oosunaarashi's Wild Ride.
>>236514Translated Japanese Wiki articles.
>man with no neck gets neck injuryhow did he manage that?
>>236550I'm really curious how he'll do, he basically has to fight the same people he would at K1, but it will feel very different to watch
>>236550imagine the seethe in this thread if dan goes straight up to ozeki after the minimum required 3 bashoes in lower sankyau/joi range just like onosato did.
>>236538Technically all three Sekiwake can Ozeki this time round, but Daieisho isn't getting anywhere near 14, and Kirishima would need to remember that he used to be good.
>>236559>Daieisho isn't getting anywhere near 1415 is pretty close to 14, I'd think.
>>236560What would he need 15 for?
>>236561To make his brain release big number good juice
https://youtu.be/C9SBJ0INY6Y?si=GCnVbCZmnPIUvdBWa video on Oho's highschool days and his team of Gonoyama, Kotoshoho, Kitanowaka, Tochitaikai and others. We also see a glimpse of Toshunryu, Kawazoe, Kayo, Onosato, Hatsuyama.at 3.25 is the origin of the mysterious Scab
>>236562Well I heard the new building is well air conditioned so maybe the fatsos will be dry enough for him to do his brand of sumo. Hopefully his body will move the way he wants it to.
>>236563Whose tsuna is that at the one minute mark? Would be pretty metal if it was Taiho's.
>>236565All he has to do is take it day by day
>>236566I believe thats the throphy you get when you become high school yokozuna
I wonder if Yokozuna are asked how big they want their tsuna to be. I wanna see Onosato with a 30kg fucker.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Gq7DCCPnJk&ab_channel=ChrisSumoS L O P P ASounds like Hoshoryu is out for blood at all points in time. Wonder if he's becoming more like Uncle.
>>236573He's doing it again. He always goes too hard in pre-basho training and then disappoints in the actual basho.
>>236559Daieisho's recent record outside of the 3 basho range is so stellar that they would likely give it to him with less than 33, he has one MK since the start of 2023 and a bunch of double digit finishes
>>236579I'd say that 9-6s don't make an Ozeki but then again the rank would kill for a 9-6 right about now.
>>236577his form last basho wasn't bad, he just needs to stop choking against random maegashira
>>236577>disappoints in the actual basho>12-3 J, beating new yokozuna
>>236581Imagine getting thrown by fucking Atamifuji in your rope basho.
>>236582>is completely and utterly overshadowed by Onosato all year>his fans console themselves by pointing at the head to head record
>>236572They must since Akebono had a 20kg one
>>236584>2025 ends with Hoshoryu winning January and Onosato winning literally every other basho>"MUH HEAD TO HEAD MUHFUGGAH"
God, to think that Onosato could win 5 basho per year for the next 8 years and still not beat Hakuho.
>>236588Shouldn't have spent so long farting around in university, should he?
>>236584>>236586Repeat of the Takanohana/Akebono debates. Taka had more yusho but Akebono had the head-to-head.
>>236590>debatesIt's hardly Rei vs Asuka, is it?
>>236590Yeah but Akebono looked like a god when he wanted to. Hoshoryu hasn't looked "good" since November and he didn't even yusho that.
>>236593And that slip was such an underwhelming finish after two fucking weeks of build upLike the worst ending possible, just lame as fuck.
>>236594It was the appropriate shameful ending for someone who has weak legs and bad footwork. The sport is conducted on a surface with terrible traction and the traditional training methods are all focused on building lower body strength. Horseryu's ">muh throws" gimmick is straight out of the Mong bokh playbook.
Fellow Onosato fans, what's your favorite thing about his fighting style? For me personally it's when he walks forward and wins. Very exciting stuff.
>>236596I would have answered seriously if you werent a shit-eating faggot. Too bad huh.
>>236596>Does his own brand of sumo>His body moves how he wants it to>Takes it one day at a timeBut for me? It's the part where he walks forwards and wins.
>>236595A throw is inherently destabilising for you and your opponent, and as such should be an option of last resort. If you're not already unstable, like being up against the tawara, why risk your position? It goes against the fundamentals of sumo. Hoshoryu's ascent to the highest rank shows that he's exceptionally good at what he's doing, because his entire fighting style is a textbook example of what not to do.
imagine losing to maegashira shitters lmao
Hey someone remind me how good Hosh did in the May bashoit was his debut tournament after all so he must have won it, right? Right?
You are so fucking mad right now
>>236604Because the last meal I ate wasn't cooked by Futagoyama's finest.
>>236605How long do you think it'll be before the first Futagoyama doujinshi start appearing?
>>236606>Nabatame storms into the kitchen>"Koga, I said I wanted it cold bukkake style.">"But Nabatame-seki, I thought you just meant a cold drink or chilled food.">"How about I show you exactly what I meant."
>>236607>"Don't Peel it Back, Okami-san!">Futagoyama no Futanari>Failed as a Rikishi, Reincarnated as a JC>Special Ingredients! Chanko Surprise>Sumo Saimin Spectacular
>>236608>Somewhere in the background an eternal Sandanme shitter is going through causes of mayonnaise
>>236596He's very "main character in a fighting game" so it's only appropriate that he's a yokozuna
>>236536fuck off cunt
>>236584>his fans console themselves by pointing at the head to head record>>236577>DISAPPOINTS IN THE ACTUAL BASHO>12-3 JYou anti-Mongolian freaks need to kill yourselves, you always ruin what are perfectly fine threads until your arrival. I'm guessing you came in with the slopfaggots too, as that started around when every post about a Mongolian started to be attacked. Stop watching sumo.
>>236613The Mongol Era is over. You can choose to gracefully accept this, or you can continue to fellate them as they fade further and further into history.
>>236614Not fellating them is not the same thing as your constant braindead HURR DAE H8 DA MUNGOS? LE HORSESHIT XDD posting
>>236615>your constantSole poster fallacy. Is it so hard to believe that there are multiple people who aren't impressed with Hoshoryu's performance? Are you so far gone that you equate all criticism of Hoshoryu with incoherent anti-Mongol babbling? Take his dick out of your mouth and stop getting so butthurt when people don't like your best boy.
>>236616I second this
>>236366I second this.
>>236616Do you not know that "your" can be plural? Did you fucking think that my issue was that one person is doing the shitposting, rather than many? In fact, my post says >You anti-Mongolian freaks in plural. What did you miss? Get out of the fucking sumo threads!
>>236620"No"
>>236615>LE HORSESHIT XDDthis but unironically
>>236616The Mong internet defense force is active in this thread. They all hang out on the mong'cord plotting their raids of various sumo discussion platforms all over the internet.
>>236625kill yourself
Lets settle it with a sumo match
Let's settle it with a sumo tournament.
>>236631We should do it at one of the /ck/ meetups they're planning and eat all the food
>>236632all 50 sumo fans walking in stomping the ground slapping our mawashi calling the food good
>>236633Our warcry?>UMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Konishikis IG is hardcore
>>236648Well Im not gonna go on instagram to look because Im not a teenage girl so post a screenshot so we can tell what youre on about
>>236647y r u all screeching "horse"?
>>236659Why does Konishiki think he's black? Head trauma?
>>236661i've never been to hawaii but i imagine it has a lot of brown wiggers
>>236661>smoking cigars is "black"Your ancestors would be ashamed at your lack of masculinity.
>>236659Trying way too hardThis has the same vibe as that cigar ash bbq sauce video
>>236660He meant umai but the i isnt usually enunciated
>>236663https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iaso0K2c8So
>>236663>he likes sucking on long brown thingsYou're in no position to attack anyone else's masculinity.
>>236663Africans have the least sexual dimorphism of any race so being of their ilk necessarily reduces masculine specific traits >>236667Oral fixation is strictly a childhood phenomenon in psychologically well adjusted people, so habits like smoking, nail biting, alcoholism or generally feeling the need to constantly put things in your mouth are explicitly non-masculine since masculinity is a phenomenon that develops post-childhood
>>236671JUST IN: Japan, following the JSA's example, decides to limit foreigner spaces to one per town.
>>236674>t. mutt
Come on guys we are really hitting rock bottom hereLets course correct a bit and go back to talking about sumo
>>236677Hoshoryu stopped training early today before fighting Kirishima. He has apparently injured his big toe and is taking precautions.
>>236678Could be a good thing, since he does tend to overtrain. Assuming it's not a serious injury, a bit of rest might actually produce a better result.
>>236681I just hope it isn't Bone Chips 2: Electric Toegaloo.
Only 9 days until the next bashowe are so close brosdon't forget to do your kachi clash and other sumo game entries
>>236684Here's my KC entry, copy if you guys want, I have pretty high confidence in all of these picksif you don't know: https://kachiclash.com/
>>234480do you have to be a fatass to do sumo?I thought this shit was just a meme
>>236687You have to be able to beat a fatass, at the very least. The easiest way to do that is to be just as big and heavy as he is.
>>236687No, but form follows function. Is it harder to throw 20kg or 50kg? It's that simple. And as the great Yokozuna Terunofuji said- nobody has ever built 200kg of muscle before. Some guys still stay pretty lean though, such as Asakoryu, picrel.
>>236690You don't need to be big to beat a fatass, just make him lose his balance.A solid kick to one of the legs to make them trip will do the job, just don't let em grapple you.
>>236691I guess that's pretty "lean" for sumo lol
>>236692Kicking means taking your foot off the floor. It's much riskier in a sumo context than simply being bigger than the other guy is, and able to shove him out.
>>236693Yes, for sumo. If you want real lean you have to go way down into the third division or lower. Ironically that is also where the mega bloatlords like Dewanojo are.
>>236694True. If the fatass doesn't charge, I don't see how I could use his weight against him.
>>236696Do keep in mind that the ring is 4.5m across, and he starts near the middle. Even if he does charge, your options are limited. If you don't get him down or out in the first two or three seconds, he's going to lay hands on you.
>>236687Takanoyama was thin as a rail by sumo standards and managed to make it to lower maegashira
>>236697Yep, it'd be a 1 shot kind of thing. I'd go for trying to defect the grapple, grab the arm, hit the ribs with theother, hit the neck, then jump for a choke hold if I can't make him trip.Huge if and I'd have to be super fast, and it's no guarantee that hitting the ribs will do shit, cause they're so fat they probably barely feel it, kek.How's the kick in the balls situation? I'm guessing not legal lmao
>>236698that is pretty thin, did he win shit?
>>236700Simply making it to the salaried ranks means he was one of the top 10% of all sumo wrestlers, but he was only there for three years before dropping down and retiring, and never won anything.
>>236699Can't kick above the shin, I think. No closed fist strikes either. Any jumping is an extreme liability. They're fat because it's the optimal shape to be under the current ruleset, being small and fast is hard mode, and puts you at serious risk of accidental injury.
>>236702pretty impressive stillsumo is a fatass biased sport
so this... is japan's greatest athletes....
>>236703>Can't kick above the shinbruh, then yea 100% you have to be a barely breathing blob of meat to triumph in this shitBegs the question, what's so interesting about this sport? Seems pretty boring to watch to me, never mind doing it. It's not even healthy to be that fat, so not even that bright side
>>236705kek
>>236706>Begs the question, what's so interesting about this sport?Two guys try to outpower each other without bullshit, it's that simple. No rounds, no dumb rules, no stupid cages or rings, no boring crap where one guy holds the other guy on the ground for an hour while nothing happens, you just get two guys on top of the clay and they try to beat each other without any drama.
>>236706kicking above the shin would be a losing move every time regardless
>>236706The average top division man is more accurately comparable to a lineman in American football, or a rugby player. The fat is an extra layer over the top of a huge and muscular body. They're a lot faster than you'd expect and the competent ones are surprisingly athletic and flexible.
>>236711Seeing that match makes me wanna think I could trip one of them with some agility and technique, but it'd pretty much have to be a 1 shot attempt. Either of those fucks pushes me full force and I'm flying off that ring, no joke.
>>236713Trips do get used sometimes. It's more common for the faster man to just sidestep the initial charge, sometimes to hilarious effect. Like you said, though, you only get one chance to do that, because doing so puts you in such a vulnerable position.
>>236706>Begs the question, what's so interesting about this sport?Autism
>>236714That's what I thought. I'd also try to dance around the dude to tire him. No way a fatass has more stamina than I do, no matter how "athletic" he is.
>>236716You run out of room very quickly in a sumo ring, especially if your opponent is 6'4 and 400 pounds. It's not impossible, but there's a reason that you simply don't see small, agile men dominating the sport, even in a country where most men are on the smaller side. A sumo wrestler is a perfect example of minmaxing - they typically perform terribly in MMA and other rulesets, but they're perfectly designed for success under sumo's rules.
>>236716There's just not enough room in the ring to pull that off, especially since you have to start charging towards each other.
>>236717>>236718Fair. In a real life situation I'd go for the good old kick in the balls and choking him unconscious while he's in pain.Better yet just run the fuck away. The fatass fears the running track more than fasting, kek.
>>236719>In a real life situationIn a real life situation you're not going to be fighting a sumo wrestler, "real life situations" are the biggest meme in combat sports
>>236719Running away is always the best thing to do. I'm not fighting anyone unless I'm getting paid handsomely.
>>236719In a real life situation the sumo wrestler would beat you over the head with a beer bottle, and then apologize for his lack of hinkaku.
>>236721even then, health is more important than moneyrealistically, I'd first try to run, if I obviously can't run I'd fight, and if they pull out a knife I'd go for the gun.>>236720>"real life situations" are the biggest meme in combat sportsI don't disagree, but if you do combat sports you're still more fit than a normal person to handle an aggression.Personally, I mostly focus on grappling and disarming. Seems the most useful irl
>>236722kek
>>236665i/na sometimes gets cut off in colloquial speech.
>>236671>NHK PartyGoddamn, and I thought the BBC were biased.
Looking at people's sumo stables I can't believe how many people believe Aonishiki and Hakuoho will thrive in the joi. They both have garbage records against them thus far, and after Takerufuji got chewed out you'd think more people would be going for old reliables like Abi, WMH, or even Oho.
>>236733>chicken legs jobbed, therefore we will never have successful joi newcomers ever again
>>236700no, he put up double digit losses>>236702>HE WAS JUST HAPPY TO BE THERE!!!!he was a loser
>>236734My brother in Christ, Hakuoho has complete 4 basho in Makuuchi since his return, and is yet to beat a SINGLE Sanyaku member. As in, the guy has literally zero wins against anyone in the Sanyaku. Aonishiki's only Sanyaku win was against Oho back in March when he was Sekiwake for a day. There's absolutely zero reason to think both rikishi will do anything besides get chewed up and spat out. Abi is gonna break Aonishiki's fucking neck.
>>236698>Takanoyama was thin as a rail by sumo standards and managed to make it to lower maegashiraNot really. His career peaked when 15 sekitori above him were suddenly expelled for match-fixing. He had three kachikoshi total as a sekitori, the last of which was less than a year after the scandal hit.
>>236703>Can't kick above the shinThe rule is that you can't kick the torso or the arms. You can kick someone in the head if you like.
>>236734We will definitely have successful joi newcomers in the future. It isn't sensible, however, to bet on newcomers, especially those with poor records against high-rankers.
>>236733your list of 'old reliables' all put up losing records in may, they're not any better than the taker of fuji
>>236740I can see the point, but I wouldn't be surprised if one of them goes 8-7 anyway despite getting on the sanyaku ass clapping tour early
>>236741That's weird, because I could've sworn the three I named were the best joi finishers in March. Strange!
its overhttps://www.nikkansports.com/m/battle/sumo/news/202507040001276_m.htmlaccording to this article hosh got injured in training and had to have a toe amputated. is this real or did they just make it up as an excuse to cut short his poorly conceived tenure as yokozuna?
>>236745The training session was cut short, not the toe. He beat Kusano three times and then dipped out before fighting Kirishima.
>>236745Is that the poorly translated R*ddit post talking about Kirishima hurting his toe?
>>236738So he outlasted those 15 sekitori simply by having more hinkaku? That's equivalent to a zensho in my book.>>236735fag
>>236745this is why you should ask what happened instead of relying on your shitty machine translations
>>2367373-0 vs Oshoma, 2-0 vs Takayasu.
>>236751*3-2 vs oshoma, derp
>>236749>by having more hinkakuThere's no way of knowing for sure who was and who wasn't match-fixing at the time. The people who were expelled were just the ones whose culpability was easily demonstrated, since they had all been texting a central broker whose phone records were then seized.
>>236753>Implying it's reasonable to treat everyone as guilty without evidence. Eastern Europe has entered the chat.
>>236752Neither of those are Sanyaku material. What's his record against Abi and WMH?
>>236757And yet they are listed as sanyaku on the banzuke. Funny that.
>>236754I didn't say anything like that. I'm saying that, with half of juryo having been proven to have been cheating, it is not unreasonable to speculate that others cheated but were not caught. Not necessarily many, not necessary few either - how do you know? That's the real tragedy of match fixing happening at all. My opinion on Takanoyama is that he went Ms2e 5-2 -> J5w, so there's no reason to take most of the wildly fluctuating 2011 banzuke rankings as indications of skill.
>>236758Holy fuck then lets all give some credit to Naya who beat the 74th Yokozuna Hoshoryu in March 2018 back when Hoshoryu was a fucking nobody.
>>236758Not every sanyakur can be a chad like Daieisho and hang out at sekiwake for years on end, most of them can't even manage to put up a 6-9 at komusubi and remain in the named ranks on the subsequent banzuke. For the majority of those appearing in sanyaku its an extremely temporary event.
>>236761Of the guys I originally mentioned (Abi, WMH, Oho), the only guy who could be called temporary is Oho. Abi and WMH have spent a good portion of the last couple years in the Sanyaku. Oshoma and Takayasu aren't Sanyaku material and Hakuoho's winrates against them are meaningless in the grand scheme of things.
>>236760>>236761The point made previously was that Hakuhoho was yet to beat a single sanyaku member. My point is that he clearly has a pretty good shot of beating at least one if not two this basho. >There's absolutely zero reason to think both rikishi will do anything besides get chewed up and spat out.I'm not going to get sucked into some bullshit about komosubi being a meme rank. I merely disagree with that nonsense post.
>>236762Takayasu is a former Ozeki who has been within one win of the cup in the past year. What in the fuck is that matter with you?
>>236759>My opinion on Takanoyama is that he went Ms2e 5-2 -> J5w, so there's no reason to take most of the wildly fluctuating 2011 banzuke rankings as indications of skill.So, you think poorly of the rikishi, because he was overpromoted? You know Ms2 almost always goes to Juryo on a 5-2, right? It's not that he was promoted unfairly, he was just promoted higher than normal. He did the thing.
>>236765And Hakuho is a former Yokozuna who's won 45 cups. Do you think he'll win next basho?
>>236768Are you retarded?
>>236766>Ms2 almost always goes to Juryo on a 5-2, rightNo shit, but he is the only M2 to ever be promoted even as high as J6 in the 15-day era, irrespective of score. >you think poorly of the rikishiYou absolutely have to consider his accomplishments in the context of the massive banzuke vacuum that had just opened up. It's ridiculous to pretend that it didn't happen or to claim that he, or anyone in a comparable situation, "earned" their rank by being morally superior. Look at this image and tell me if you notice anything unusual.
>>236770>Look at this image and tell me if you notice anything unusual.Yes, you are typing in every rank instead of using ranges.
>>236770So he earned his sekitori status by being a skilled rikishi AND he earned a high rank by being morally superior. I don't see how you could see any of that as a black mark on Takanoyama.
>>236772This entire conversation started around the point of whether or not rikishi need to be fat to move up the ranks. The answer is yes, and Takanoyama is not a counterexample because he had a once-in-a-century lucky break. >>236687>>236698>do you have to be a fatass to do sumo?>Takanoyama was thin as a rail by sumo standards and managed to make it to lower maegashira
>>236774>Takanoyama is not a counterexample because he had a once-in-a-century lucky break.Which I pointed out is wrong because 5-2 at Ms2 is NOT a lucky break. Sure, he had help to make it to the top division, but making salary is a huge fucking deal in ozumo and you know it.
Tamashoho's not that big.
>>236776>Sure, he had help to make it to the top divisionWhich is what we were discussing. Clearly he made sekitori on his own, but not makuuchi.
>>236778Then you don't need to be big to do sumo.
>>236777NSK database has him 34 kg heavier than Takanoyama.
>>236780I don't think anyone would describe him as a "fatass" though.
>>236779https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Weu5JiX0FMYou know what, sure, you're completely right.
>>236782I know.
>>236770For future reference, you can list ranks as a range instead of having to list every rank separately. For example, J1-J8 for your query. This works across division too, so for example M12-J8.
>>236778He reached makuuchi three separate times. You can maybe say he took advantage of a depleted juryo but he still put up a 10-5. After that he put up a 9-6 at J3w to get back into makuuchi a second time, and 11-4 at J4e for the third time. It's pretty clear he would've ended up in makuuchi at least once regardless of whether the scandal happened.
>>236789I think his argument was that he would have bounced out before that. Either way is speculation. We've no way of knowing what would have happened had it gone differently. What is known is that he appeared on the top row of the banzuke .
Chiyonofuji is the best example of an actually successful and somewhat lean rikishi
>>236322>>236324
>>236745He seriously needs to stop overextending himself during keiko
>>236635I really like this pic
>>236802>Heh, with my high practice bout count I'm sure to win the next bash-ACK!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cuwCt5gnNBELook, I'm just gonna say it. Onosato's dohyo-iri fucking sucks, and Hoshoryu's is actually quite good.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WP9-xAyjrvEFRESH SLOP GET IT WHILE IT'S HOTTatsunami seems to always upload at the same time of day. I don't know if they do it on fixed days though, might start taking notice.
>>236811Absolute fucking production values a minute into the video.
>>236810well hosh is getting into it while onosato is still new to it, his long lengs look funny when stomping.
>>236811Its 20.00 in Japan so its propably the hour alot of people are just zoning out and rotting on their phones
>>236811The UMA begins at about 7 minutes and never really stops.
>>236810So bad he made the gyoji fall over. His dew sweeper didn't even want to sit in the same zip code.
>>236817Is the gyoji having a heatstroke or something?
>>236817Poor Takayasu is just sat there looking like a man who misses the Yokozuna of last decade.>He still isn't bending his arms when he claps, he still doesn't shuffle along the ground properly, the gyoji just fell over, and where the hell is Takanosho?
>>236817>Onosato's slap was so powerful that it created a shock wave that knocked the gyoji to the groundHOLY YOKOZUNA
>>236818Chris said it was around 37 degrees in Nagoya this week. Take it with the usual grain of salt, but anything in the 30s must be absolutely brutal for a middle-aged man in an ornate robe.
>>236705The middle one’s belly button is turning into a pussy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZVf09KwFLIProbably the last one for a month
>>236827Isn't there one more Saturday?
>>236830Yeah I'm dumb and thought the basho started tonight
>>236831If only we were so lucky.
Please god let Kotoeiho fight Abi. Everyone wants to see that shiko-off.
Come on Takasago this is just embarrassing.
>>236835Engrish is charming and cute.
But why is the dohyo so high?
>>236842Because they don't have enough clay to make it as high as it should be.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qtODyUgJAQ0&ab_channel=ChrisSumoDaieisho gave some advice to some younger guys at his stable, that means he>*hits crack pipe*has his eye on the Oitekaze kabu.
>>236846My first thought was "No way Daieisho has another 6 years in him". I thought he was one of the aging veterans but he's six months younger than me. Maybe I'm an aging veteran now...
>>236847You can hang around for up to 5 years waiting for a kabu, right? So as long as the current Oitekaze agreed to pass it on to him he's basically already there if he wanted it.
>new kid is the only one with proper plank formCome on Roga crack the whip on these lazy fools
>>236850I wonder where Futagoyama was that day. I hope he wasn't out recruiting, there's barely enough room for everyone as is.
This will be the first time Kirishima has been at the back of the line at the ring entrance ceremony since March last year.
>>236851Babutame was out too so they were probably doing some event or something
>>236852Remember when people thought he was going to make yokozuna
>>236854He isn't even back of the line because he forced it due to being an Ozeki. His spot at the back of the line is Onosato's sloppy seconds.
>>236854He got pretty close. The guy is still capable of winning yushos, getting back to Ozeki i don't know.
>>236846Who in the hell is that random fuck who was criticising Onosato's foot sliding? There are only 74 rikishi with the right to criticise him and most of them are dead. Some probably never existed.
Takakeisho is going the Takanohana's way of losing weight. The guy I thought would die in the dohyo may outlive his contemporaries, lmao.
>>236864I wouldn't even be surprised if he's been fasting this entire time. The world record for a fast is 382 days so it's not like he couldn't have.
Grace. Dignity. Poise.
>>236867KOGA, by Armani
mofo has the biggest belly in tatsunami, if not the whole ichimon
>>236872Okaryu is so based
>>236872His charisma genuinely carries their entire sloppa channel. Everyone else is generally miserable.
>>236874Miserable can be kino too. Imagine a sumo version of Trainspotting.
>>236874
>>236874Babutamebros...
>>236874if there is anyone in that heya with charisma, it's shunrai, but i dont hate against okaryu, it's just funny he thinks he's not eating much
夏場所では自身より身長が低い翠富士(安青錦は182センチ、翠富士は174センチ)に対し、左上手を取りつつ頭をつけたところから内無双を決めるという一番もあったが、自身のスタイルを貫き通せていることも安定感につながっているのかもしれない。
Aonishiki's stablemaster is the luckiest man in the world to have someone actually talented land on his doorstep out of the blue like that.>Hey bro you want a free sekitori?>Okay lmao
>>236883
>>236885If we're talking about lucky stablemasters, there's nobody in the conversation aside from Terunofuji - almost as soon as he gets elder stock, he's handed the largest stable in all of sumo with several experienced sekitori ready to go.
>>236890Nothing lucky, he was justly recognized for his superior hinkaku, legacy as a dai-yokozuna, and selfless dedication to training his fellow sekitori, including providing mentorship to both Hoshoryu and Onosato.
>>236890Who got luckier, Teru scooping up Isegahama's sekitori, or Kisenosato scooping up Onosato?
>>236892Terunofuji. The better Onosato does, the more dramatic the comparison to his master is.
>>236885>have someone actually talented land on his doorstep out of the blueDan is good specifically because he was lucky enough to land in Aminishiki's stable, Aminisihki is this century's Mainoumi, its not any lucky accident that he is capable of recognizing and nurturing potential.
>>236893Wrong! Japanese yokozuna mentoring the next big Japanese yokozuna is going to go way further in the JSA than Teru presiding over crash test dummies like Takeru, Hakuoho, and Atami who all can't break sanyaku.
>>236895Kusano will reach sanyaku easy
>>236895Yeah, but it comes at a cost. Kisenosato's own career is already a footnote for Onosato's, and that's just going to intensify. Consider Hakuho - how many yushos did his master win? What was his master's peak rank? Hell, we're a few years out now, some of you probably don't remember Hakuho's masters name.
>>236897Juryo yusho mean nothing. Tamashoho has three.
>>236899You mean Kotoshoho?
>>236900I mean shobloshohosho
>>236900Same thing. There's zero reason to think Kusano is gonna breeze through Makuuchi.
>>236905The quality of Kusano's sumo is noticeably superior to Kotoshoho's, at least.
>>236906Yeah but at least Kotoshoho looks like he could suck a golfball through a garden hose.
>>236907Please don't post pictures like this on a blue board. People might succumb to temptation.
>>236908>OOOOOOOHHHHHH IM GONNA PICK KOTOSHOHO FOR KACHI CLAAASSSHHHHHH
Kotoshoho looks like a fucking fish
>>236910Yeah but he probably eats pussy like a starving Ethiopian. His wife must be a very happy woman.
>>236911I bet shes a beard
>horsezuna day 1 performance >horsezuna vs takayasu performance>horsezuna vs takayasu day 1
>>236912If Kotoshoho was gay, which sekitori do you think he'd be gay with?
>>236914Roga
>>236914We need to stop this before the sujos show up.
>>236915>nnnffff roga your muscles are so big omg i cant believe you run the training sessions when futagoyama-oyakata isnt there omgggg
>>236916Too late
A cool breeze blows south,The rikishi will be dry,Thrust hands shan't slip.
Ancient foundationsSeasons pass, summer heat nowis air conditioned
With rotund bodies,Dry as they could ever be,Will Daieisho win?
miss my boys
What's the deal with all the best wrestlers having extremely wide tooth spacing?
>>236924The secret to success is flossing with shoelaces.
>>236923hard to believe that both of them are now dead
>>236924Wide tooth spacing happens when your jaw grows out of proportion to your teeth. Jaws are strongly affected by growth hormone, so if someone has a huge and powerful jaw he most likely also has a massive chest, large hands, and a heavy frame - all of which are helpful qualities for a rikishi.
UMAUMMMAAAAAAうっまあああああああ
>>236934
>>236935美味い???馬???
>>236934>>236936https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tVoKUqlGdh4
>>236934>stop calling me that name!!!
>>236947I'm starting to think you've never seen a horse.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eMtcYV1-ciU>have you ever heard of the sumo wrestler who deserved to be a Yokozuna but never became one>that's Tamawashi Ichiro>here we bring you the story of injusticewhat the fuck is nigger going on about? he thought old Tom was gonna get promoted to Yokozuna from back to back tournaments at Sekiwake? lmaoing @ this westoid.
>>236956He just started watching, give him some lax. He will propably post a video soon where he thinks Kisenosato didn't earn his promotion to Yokozuna
who's gonna be the first designated cook at futagoyama? i vote for denuma, he's 24 already, still struggling in lower makushita and it seems he enjoys cooking more than anything else.
>>236962Kyoda (depending on his knee) or Soga, whose back seems pretty messed up.
>>236962Koga, creating a bizarre scenario where the stable's top talent tries as hard as they can to stay outside the makushita joi, in order to keep doing shifts on chanko duty and avoid Koga's cooking.
My shikona? Heh, if I told you I'd have to kill you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wq7dz4oxdvY&ab_channel=%E4%BA%8C%E5%AD%90%E5%B1%B1%E9%83%A8%E5%B1%8BsumofoodFresh Futa slop two days in a row!
>>236957He didn't
Chris is shitting all over Onosato's yokozuna ring entering, meanwhile the Japanese fans love it, but apparently Chris thinks he knows better than them. And Chris loves Hosh's entrance, but the Japs think its meh. Why are reddit tier twats like Chris all so predictably and similarly full of themselves? Do they all share a particular personality disorder or something? >I know more about your culture than you do and my opinions about it are more worthy than yours are because I'm an unsophisticated foreigner who can barely even speak the languageDo you think Chris goes and asks the Japs what to think when it comes time for him to form an opinion about matters of English culture?
I like Onosatos dohyo iri. Its unique and cool.And Ill fight any one of you pussies that says different
No one cares.
I care
>>236986Chris (and me, and you) is every bit as entitled to have an opinion on sumo or any other aspect of Japanese culture as any man in Japan.
>>236986You are the clueless redditor, idiotThe fans like him because he's Onosato, it's the Japanese reporters that are criticizing him
>>236986>Why are reddit tier twats like me all so predictably and similarly full of ourselves? Do we all share a particular personality disorder or something?fixed
>>236986Onosato's dohyo-iri IS complete garbage. It genuinely looks like he's putting no effort into it and just phoning it in. Can't believe Kisenosato just lets him do that. He's a university graduate LARPing as a rikishi and it shows. The rope is more than an "I won a lot" badge to Hoshoryu, and it's evident in the effort he puts into his training and dohyo-iri.
>>236997When you've earned your rope, you can show him how it's done.
>>236998What a stupid fucking comment.
>>236999It really was, wasn't it? Imagine some fat fuck on 4chan thinking he has any right to say a yokozuna is "LARPing as a rikishi".
>>237000His dohyo-iri is terrible. That's all. It looks like he's putting zero effort in and just doesn't care.
>>237001Onosato and his master both think his dohyo-iri is satisfactory. What makes you think that you're more qualified than Kisenosato to judge it?
>>237002>I know what Kisenosato thinksPut the crack pipe down, Chris.
>yokozuna does his style of dohyo-iri and takes it one day at a time>this is badFucking tourists
>>237002Onosato himself said he still has a lot to learn. Even Chris mentions this on his video. Did you even watch it? Are you here just to shit up the thread?
we can all agree that onosato's dohyo-iri is the best if you actually know your sumo onionsthe bigger problem is that the mongol has been allowed to apron-mog our guy
>>237006>Onosato himself said he still has a lot to learnWhich part of Chris' video was it where Onosato said "My dohyo-iri sucks because I'm phoning it in"?
>>237004>Yokozuna does his style of fist pumping and high fiving the crowd>This is bad
>>237007>Japanese yokozuna>standing proudly as his kesho mawashi displays traditional symbols of grace and dignity>Mongol "yokozuna">slouching lazily as his kesho mawashi displays ugly angry mongol men destroying everything
>>237008Take Onosato's cock out of your mouth for a second and I'm sure you'll be able to figure it out
>>237010A boy only truly becomes a man when he puts aside notions of "cool" and "badass" and begins to appreciate the simple and the peaceful.
I just wish Onosato would bend his arms while clapping instead of doing big dumb goofy windmills.
>>237011If you think being humble is an admission of incompetence and failure, you've failed to understand not just the expectations placed on a yokozuna, but one of the core foundations of Japanese culture as a whole.
>>237007>Onosato's sword bearer: an ex-ozekisovl & dignity>Horseshit's sword bearer: a manlet gimmick wrestler disgraceful and offensive
>>237015At least Hoshoryu is participating in bring-your-dog-to-work day.
>>237014dumb people are dumb, they have dumb thoughts and express dumb opinions. 50% of the posters on 4chan are of below average intelligence, thats why you see so many horseshitryu fans sounding off in this thread.
>>237013You can watch 74 other dohyo-iris if you love bent arms that fucking much
>Kotozakura has once again vowed to make YokozunaOh for fuck's sake not again.>>237017>50% of the posters on 4chan are of below average intelligenceThis is a really ironic thing to say considering you're not accounting for selection bias as truly stupid people probably don't hang around forums all day shitposting about wanting to eat Koga's chanko.Haven't you ever noticed just how many posts on this site use capital letters, full stops, and have decent grammar? You seem to be the exception and are most likely just projecting.
ONE WEEK Until the bashoWe are almost thereDont let the boredom drive us into being assholes again
>>237019You're such an optimist. Look through this thread and see how many of the posts are single lines of text riddled with insults. Sure, the truly stupid people of the world aren't on obscure imageboards talking about weird styles of grappling. But there are plenty of people on this website, in this thread, that show all the hallmarks of being stupid, ignorant, and unwilling to learn.
Onosato made his sanyaku debut a year ago and has subsequently won 4 championships, he is absolutely dominant as a yokozuna should be. Any given basho Onosato is more likely to win the cup than the entire rest of the field put together. Hosh made his sanyaku debut over 3 years ago and has subsequently won only twice, he is long odds to yusho even as a yokozuna. So which one of those two do you think would have the confidence to half ass the ceremonial stuff because his performance as a wrestler justifies his yokozuna title and which one do you think would be driven to be a desperate tryhard and feel the need to do the entry perfectly in order to avoid further criticism of his mediocre results in competition?
>>237023Yeah
>>237022Posting insults doesn't make someone stupid, faggot.>>237023Onosato's Makuuchi debut was January last year. He's complete 9 basho and won 4, which to me isn't quite:>Any given basho Onosato is more likely to win the cup than the entire rest of the field put togetherAnd saying that Hoshoryu is long odds to yusho is crazy. So far this year he's gone 12-3 any time he wasn't injured, and 12-3 has been the winning score in 2/3 basho so far this year. Don't forget that Hoshoryu and Onosato are both in their mid 20s, they aren't even at their physical peak yet. You just got to watch Hoshoryu be mediocre for longer because he's been in grand sumo for longer. Stop riding Onosato's dick.
>>237025Constantly, pointlessly, and vulgarly insulting people is most definitely a sign of stupidity.
>>237026It can also be a sign that someone else deserves insulting.
Over their last 3 complete basho, Hoshoryu's winrate is actually higher than Onosato's.
>>237027Unwarranted arrogance and the idea that you're entitled to mete out any punishments that you see fit upon the deserving is also a sign of colossal stupidity and all-around unpleasantness.
>>237030This coming from someone who thinks 4chan users are representative of the wider population.
>>237031Putting words I didn't say into my mouth isn't helping your case.
>>237032>50% of the posters on 4chan are of below average intelligenceI know the quote from that George Carlin clip when I hear it paraphrased, faggot. You must be super smart.
>>237033That wasn't me, and I've never watched anything by George Carlin. You should just stop here and cool off.
>>237034FYI I don't believe you.
>>237033"Comedians" invent nothing, everything they say has already been regurgitating for decades, if not centuries. That sentiment can probably be traced to some guy in ancient Greece.
>>237036You can believe whatever you like.
This is gonna be a long week
What do we think of Shunta's k-pop shrine?
>>237040Evidence of his robust heterosexuality, unlike his brother whose photobooks are just pictures of trucks.
>>237040and his rival, Umeyama's anime figI think Shunta wins
>>237026Oh, you mean like distorting Hoshoryu's name to horseshitryu at every occasion? Like this poster over here >>237017 who seems so concerned about this same issue?Give me a break
Referring to Kirishima as KiriSHITma is the height of comedy.
Onosato: Makkuchi debut at M15w, two consecutive 11-4s (one of which was a fusen), 3rd 'sho ranked in sanyakuDan: Makkuchi debut at M15e (a higher rank), two consecutive 11-4s (all legit wins, no fusens) , 3rd 'sho ranked M1eIs there any way to explain this other than blatant anti-White racism?
>>237045Yes, silly nicknames are a prime example. Horseshitryu and the variations are as annoying as "Drumpf".
>>237050Banzuke fuckery explains an awful lot of things. Takayasu not being spat into Maegashira is the only thing of note, but that can be explained by how WTK increasing the Sanyaku to 8 rikishi puts the K1w spot at the place M1e used to be.
>>237036you're ignoring the possibility in this case that you're one of the 50% of people who have below average intelligence and that your low intelligence causes you to make and believe erroneous presumptions and ideas.
>>236824would you?
>>237050White people dropped nukes on them, the Japanese are allowed to be racist.
>>237056Jewish post.
>>237060On a scale of 1 to McDonalds, how American are you?
>>237056Now talk about Japanese firebombing in China
>>237061America dropped nukes. America has lots of non-whites who may well have been involved. Not only that but what has a Ukrainian got to do with Japan being nuked? And on top of that, the nukes were generally considered a good idea by all since a ground invasion by America would've most likely cost far more lives and far more harm.
>>237064Waito piggu arr rook same
>>237064Not that I agree with that anon but historically it actually is relevant since Ukraine was then part of the USSR and America dropped the nukes specifically to secure a Japanese surrender without having to invade the Japanese mainland...an invasion in which the Soviet Union would likely have seized the northern half of Japan.
>>237067Hokkaido is the best part of Japan so the nukes were worth it to keep it from turning into North Korea.
>>237067If there had been a North Japan and a South Japan, we would have twice as many bashos in a year. Therefore all sumo fans should disapprove of America's bombing.
>>237067>Hmmm America dropped two nukes on us 80 years ago>I know how to get back at them, lets only demote Takayasu to K1w so Aonishiki only gets a small overpromotion instead of a big overpromotion!Take your meds.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8yocnlPDm0Literally me when I see Atamifuji.
>>237070Let's not pretend that the Japs only started being racist in 1945. Gaijin are lucky they're even allowed to put a mawashi on.
>>237069Russians would've banned sumo as feudalistic anti-worker propaganda.
>>237072Don't be a stupid leftist who thinks wanting to keep outsiders out of your country is racist.
>>237073Russians love wrestling, just look at Karelin.
>>237075I feel like more guys would enjoy wrestling if they just did it. It's like MMA minus the constant injuries.
>>237074Making a distinction between natives and foreigners is explicitly racist. That's not a leftist talking point, it's the foundation of racism itself.
>>237078That's better. If you want to be racist, at least have the balls to admit that you are.
>>237079They will call you racist, but they will never call you wrong.
>>237075Sure but they'd push their wrestling, not sumo. The whole point of sumo is the feudal traditions, and commies would destroy it, just like they did with Chinese traditions.
>>237080I just did call you wrong, or at least dishonest.
>>237083>everyone who disagrees with me is DA JOOZ
>>237085You still can't point to a single case of me being wrong.
>>237089My dude, you tried to argue that wanting to keep outsiders out of your country wasn't racist. That was so egregiously wrong that you backtracked immediately. It's right there, everyone can see it. Whether racism itself is right or wrong is a far deeper and more complex discussion that you're clearly not qualified to participate in.
>>237091OK buddy.
Sumo
>>237094Off-topic, please go.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KY27Cs8bGg0&ab_channel=SUMOPRIMETIME
>>237097Are shiko actually a good exercise or is it some traditionalist bullshit they put on for the cameras?
>>237098I'd be surprised if you can do twenty shiko with good form. I'd be even more surprised if you didn't ache like a motherfucker the next day after doing so. It looks goofy, but it's a brutal leg workout and all the best rikishi swear by it.
>>237099I'd be surprised if I couldn't. I don't consider myself strong but I have a 140kg deadlift and work a pretty active job. It's too late at night for it now but tomorrow I'll give it a go.
>>237098They are really good exercises. More importantly they were exercises developed specifically for sumo, which means improvement without significant risk of injury. Traditional sumo exercises have the benefit of sumo being their full-time existence, which means they can afford to have gradual incremental improvements through repetition of low-impact exercise, instead of risking injury through high-impact weight training.
>>237100Sure, you're not a weakling, but it's a completely different movement to standard weightlifting, and I hope it's different to anything you do at your job. It's surprisingly difficult - too difficult for some of the lazier rikishi in sloppa videos - just to get the form correct, because it's not as intuitive as it looks. It's less a matter of raw strength and more of mindful control over your movements, although strength and endurance are mandatory for doing a good amount. Twenty should be reasonably taxing for an untrained man, especially if he's heavy. The rikishi will often do more than a hundred as part of their morning training session.
>>237097I remember the good old days when Hiro was still making content other than a bimonthly couple of clip collections of matches everyone already watched twice at least.
>>237104Treating someone differently because of their nationality and ethnicity is the definition of racism.
>>237111>>>/pol/
https://mainichi.jp/articles/20250704/k00/00m/030/291000cMainichi is the latest to cover this guy. Think the NSK will buckle?
>>237119Not without some serious palm-greasing.
>>237119the more support he gets and the more pressure the JSA gets, the less likely they are to take him on. his best bet would be some proper japanese grovelling. should have dodged that IDF national service. three years pissed up the wall
>>237121That's true of almost every deshi acquisition, though. Dude really does look like a rikishi, I would feel bad if ultimately they tell him to fuck off.
>>237123Personally, I don't think they have any need for an age limit when they only have 600 wrestlers in a country of 120 million. However, the existence of the rule means that they must have had to reject men before, and it's a slap in the face to all of them if a foreigner with a sob story has an exception made for him. They'd have to change the rule entirely to retain their dignity, in my opinion.
>>237124Well now sounds like a good time to amend the rules.
>>237125Imagine all the mid-thirties salarymen who'd join up just to escape their careers! It'd be quite the spectacle.
>>237098Significant;y strengthened my lower back and hips. Haven't had much if any lower back pain since I started doing them regularly.Can hold a squat for minutes as well.
How good of a career would Asanoyama have if not for the suspension?Would he be a Shodai (someone who fell after a while), a Takakeisho (someone who won titles) or a Kotooshu (a 10-5 Merchant who doesn't compete for tournaments but who also doesn't do badly)?
>>237132Well he was supposed to be the next Hakuho so that should tell you something
>>237128Doing pushup and situps regularly will also make you immune to lower back pain.
>>237124>I don't think they have any need for an age limit ... However, the existence of the rule means that they must have had to reject men beforeNo, they just got embarrassed when the news razzed them back in the 90s when Tomonohana, who already had a wife and kids, joined sumo at age 27. That's the entire reason the age limit rule exists: someone got mad 30 years ago.
https://www.sportingnews.com/jp/tsn/news/nagoya-grand-sumo-tournament-aonishiki-preview/63ad6d679aab218b4a278377The Sporting News is speculating that Aonishiki will rise rapidly to yokozuna
>>237141This is a sports website with so little information about sumo, they don't even have a "sumo" section. These are just loose articles which aren't meant to be read.
>>237145You can tell that sad little fanboy just searches for any mention of aonishitki and then posts it here
>>237134Neither of those target the hips and lower body.Lower back pain originates there and tight legs.I also do pushups.
>reeeee stop posting sumo news links in the sumo thread!!!!!lol
>>237155Random speculation isnt news. You might as well link old posts here.
>>237133>he was supposed to be the next Hakuholike hell he was
>>237132Probably would've ended up more like Goeido where he ends up doing the bare minimum to keep rank once the injuries pile up, then puts up a random zensho out of nowhere before going back to the bare minimum. The fact that Asanoyama couldn't stay healthy when he had what was basically a year long break does not suggest he would've had a strong ozeki career.
the jungyo dohyo is fake, its really just a wooden frame filled with styrofoam and covered with a thin layer of clay. the jsa tried to keep this secret, but I found out about it anyway.
>>237165>quadrupedal animation
>>237166as far as I'm concerned, rikishi are the last quadrupedal hominids
>>237167horseryu
>>237168You're thinking of Kiribayama. There's no horse kanji in Hoshoryu.
>>237164>Dohyo has fallen, billions must shiko
what's the name of our beya and the shikona naming convention again?
>>237173Yotsubagawabeya, ~gaiji
>>237167No, dummy, they're chickens.
>>237174thanks, what were the kanjis for it?四つ葉川部屋and 外事 or 害児 or 外字 ? second one is funny, although the last one is pretty cool too
>>237178四葉川部屋 and 害児, yes.
>>237179My shikona would be 白豚害児
馬の糞
>>237195You forgot 龍
Nice update from Chris on the training bout situation. Horse's toe and Zak's neck injuries are apparently not interfering too badly.
>>237199Onosato's promotion hangover, on the other hand...
>Hosh trying to swagger>when he can't even win a yusho
>>237200likely to affect him as badly as his previous "yusho hangover" did, he was awful in training before may too
>>237202Huh, I wonder if there's something to the whole leaving a little in the backburner and not giving it 1000% at all times thing...
>>237207'sato operates at approximately 40% power to reach yusho level. he's sort of like yujiro hanma
>>237208>Onosato against the rest of makuuchi
Official Onosato postal stamps are out
latest odds to win the 'shothat onosato bet looks like a bargain given that he has been winning more than half time time for over a year. the hosh bet looks a ripoff since he wins so infrequently, everyone else is pretty much a longshot. and apparently theres ppl who think taker will be able to win farming mid magashria.
>>237218>gambling
>>237218>Takayasu 18/1Has the bookmaker ever heard of Takayasu before? I wouldn't bet on him if it was 100/1.
>>237218>Takerufuji 16/1
>>237218>Zak rated lower than all the sekiwakeits over>Dan rated higher than both komusubinobody respects the banzuke committee's efforts
>>237220Nonsense. I'd put 100 yen on that just for the letdown.
>>237218people seem to be rating Hosh favorably after his strong finish in Natsu. I do think it's a bit too optimistic. his issue is consistency and he still hasn't shown that he's overcome it.
>>237253>his issue is consistencyExactly. He needs to stop taking a random day off in week 1.Hopefully, he will internalize the idea that, because of his rank, absolutely no one is ever going to fight him at less than 100%.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90pn-noF-fUNow this is slop
>>237259He needs to stop assuming that a random maegashira is an easy, guaranteed win for him. He's excellent under pressure, and he needs to treat every match as if it matters.
>>237261>and he needs to treat every match as if it matters.His opponents certainly do. He needs to be reminded that they’re fighting for a permanent pay raise just for beating him.
>>237260Came here to post this. We've been waiting on this slop for weeks
>>236366>30 years old>highest rank jonidanit's okay to give up buddy
>>237260cool they even got a picture with Hosh and one of his fans
>>237273>give upThe problem is that giving up would only make his life lonelier and poorer.
>>237273>>237279Realistically, they have a pretty good sense of how high they can rise pretty quickly in their careers. Those guys in their late twenties who stall out in sandanme or whatever are in it for the love of the game. They like stable life. Plus, the stables rely on them to manage the younger wrestlers.
>>237260Does the prohibition on wrestlers driving motorized vehicles not extend to tractors or was Horseshit violating the rules? If the later should he be forced to retire? >I planted my rice with Horseshit, very fertile.
>>237282We got him, boys.
Rare Ajigawaslop https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QFqvKhQN8XI
>>237285Not an official beya channel. This slop is processed.
>>237285i fw this thumb fr dan looking sigma deadass puling aura points
>>237280>are in it for the love of the game>They like stable lifesweet summer child-kun...
>>237280Remember that guy in The Shawshank Redemption that hanged himself when he was released?
>>237290>Brooks was here
>>237289>>237290I remember seeing a documentary many years ago about former wrestlers’ lives, ones who spent years in the sport but never made sekitori.It was depressing as fuck.
>>237296What's more depressing?Never making sekitori? Or making it, then getting injured so badly you get knocked down all the way to the lowest ranks.
>>237297Retired wrestlers will always have the benefits of their highest attained rank, no matter how long they last at that rank, and that includes supporters contacts.
>>237296people are so naive on what post sumo life is like, if you don't make it to sekitori is basically fucking over in your life. Either live as the heya's maid and chanko bitch until you are 50yo or hope you got family outside because the best you'll get out in the world is wagie tier jobs and washing old man's ball sacks.
>>237297What's more depressing, having tried to make and fail or spending your entire life thinking "if only I'd tried to be a pro athlete, id be so much happier right now if I'd have done that"
>>237299Yeah, the old guy I saw was a delivery driver, hoisting crates of beer and shit on his ancient, fucked knees.
>>237301Those jobs that involve being on you feet a lot of the day and lifting things are better than office jobs even if they pay less. Getting exercise on the job keeps you in good shape, office cucks get off work and go to the gym or they end up in terrible shape with zero muscle. I was never in better condition than after I worked as a mover for 6 months. Women were all over me back then too.
>>237296>this guy has to live a normal wagie life, isn't that so horribly soul crushing and depressing??Yes. Yes it is.
>>237285>ancient video Goddamn you are really scraping the barrel Why don't you just hit rock bottom already and just type "Dan" over and over again and post thatfuck's sakes
>>237302Those jobs are the last thing you want to be doing after a long sumo career. When you were a mover you were likely ten or fifteen years younger than these retired guys, and you didn't have twenty years worth of chronic injuries and wrecked joints. Never mind keeping fit, they need to be careful just to ensure they aren't totally crippled by 50.
>>237304>isn't that so horribly soul crushing and depressing?Considering that you spent 2/3 of your life devoted to the way of sumo, surrounded by like-minded people doing simple everyday tasks and then suddenly you are alone in the world forced to serve capitalist overlords who don't give 2 fucks about you and if you refuse you starve to death? Yes, yes it is.
>>237307Low-skilled jobs are depressing for everyone. This is why any sane society puts so much emphasis on education and learning useful skills as a youth.
>>237307I understand your point and I don't really disagree but it's not an issue that's unique or even really about sumo at it's core. At least they got to live the life for a time. That's more than many get.
>>237305>ancient videoits from July 6th
>>237312You're in 2025, you absolute retard
>>237313>fell for the henkaDanfag no kachi
>>237314
>>237315My guy, you bit the bait. It wasn't even good bait.
>>237317see>>237315
>>237320The objective was to make someone call him out for being obviously wrong. He got what he wanted, you're annoyed.
Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan
>>237324based
>>237329I would be fan of Aonishiki if he weighed this much
>>237329Trannytame bros how many wins are we thinking this time around?
>>237329Big Dan, the one and only.
>>237335Excellent. They should put Onosato in a top hat and tails for the London koen.
>>237324>t. Creepy Nuts
>>237336London isn't that type of town anymore, sherwani & a turban would be more appropriate.
>>237341He will drive out the evil spirits
Fresh, unspoiled, piping hot Chris slop!>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9qg6rmCFgM
>>237352>Kotoeiho badly injured his elbow in a training matchFuck I'm mad
>>237352Only heya-material can be called slop, not Schrishzoids copy-paste from japanese papers
>>237356This is an interesting sub-definition of slop. Highly localized, obviously. How interesting.
Here's some slop starring our one and only Danhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DIEYZHpQyeM
>>237218Odds are shifting around as more wagers are placed. Onosato has dropped to 5:2, Horse's odds are up to 9:2. KiriSHITma's have dropped below Daieisho's & Wakatakakage's and they're all double digit long shots now as is everyone else, there isn't a single competitor who's odds haven't dropped other than Onosato's.
>>237364I've never seen such high quality slop. Absolutely sublime.
>>237364>aoiyama, this cream is so rich. and you said you made this with milk from your own cow?>arigato gozaimasu but no, i said i made the cream myself
>>237364Man I just want to hang out and cook and eat with Aoiyama and Kaisei. They both seem generally relaxing to be around, always soft spoken.
>>237373Majestic...
>>237369Bookies trying to get bets on Hosh to cover Onosato winning lol
>>237375Onosato winning would be quite a feat, its been over 10 years since anyone won 3 in a row and nearly 30 since a Jap did it
>>237379Thats why he's gonna do it
>>237379This basho will define if Onosato is a mental midget or not.>le yusho hangover copethat wasn't a thing up until 5 years ago when maegashiras started winning yushos and then shat the dohyo next basho.
>Akebono joins sumo at the age of 23wow he must be the greatest rikishi of all time, nobody has ever been this good this fast
>>237390Akebono was pretty great yeah
>>237390Akebono was nuts.
>>237390Akebono joined sumo in 1988 at 18 years old, two months shy of his 19th birthday.
>>237390>nobody has ever been this good this fastSo far, Dan has proceeded up the rankings chart faster than Chad did.
>>237400no shit
>>237401you need to stop fucking posting, I'm not joking
>>237403Let the danfan live his life at least he is posting about sumo. Also NewDan is cool.
>>237401Aonishiki put up double digits his first two bashoes in makuuchi, Akebono went over a year in the top division before he was able to top double digits.
>>237409and Chiyonofuji got demoted out of juryo, so Hitoshi is definitely on his way to GOAT status
>>237407Fuck the danfag and fuck you
Ichiyamamoto
>>237413I wish there were another Yamamoto so we could call out his fraudulent name.
>>237414Wakatakamoto is the closest we're gonna get.
ZAK IS BACK TO WEARING HIS MINT MAWASHII REPEATTHE PROTAGONIST OF OZUMO HAS RETURNED TO THE CORRECT MAWASHI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XAzIWdLJxtwfresh off the presses
>>237420
>>237419the damage is done.
HOIII *butsukaris you across the thread*
Information will be posted as soon as the update.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SD7byNCwUns&ab_channel=ChrisSumo>Hoshoryu says he feels TOO goodYeah, I'm seeing a 9-6 from him.
>>237431H O K U S E I H O F O O T A G E
>>237431Anti danfags are so tiresome. What’s not to like about Dan he is a chad with 10x more hinkaku than horshityu.
>>237438>10 x 0 = 0I thought you liked Dan?
>>237438Shut the fuck up already
>>237420Babutame seems so sedate and depressed
>237438>baiting on a fucking /xs/ sumo threadpeople are so desperate for a reply these days.
Who will capitalize by picking up double kinboshi in the first tournament in years with that possibility available? Abi is the clear choice since he has an established record of a better than 40% win rate against both 'zunas and he will face them both unless Hosh pulls out due to his toe injury, but that might just be my confirmation bias talking since Abi is my favorite. Oho seems like he might be a possibility for double gold too if the good version of Oho shows up to this basho. I could also seem Oho pulling off a 4-11 with two kinboshi, he is just that kind of guy. Plus he is 6-4 career against Hosh & has won twice against Onosato this year.
>>237446It will be a complete wildcard nobody sane predicts
>>237446I dont see Oho beating OnosatoHis style matches up better with HoshI would also bet on Abi for a double kinboshi
>>237446I think this guy was the last one to get two kinboshi. I can see Abi doing that and also going make-koshi, lmao.
>>237452Endo and Myogiryu both did Jan 2020, when we were at peak levels of HakKak breaking. Hokutofuji is also credited with a win against both, but Kakuryu was fusen so it doesn't count as a kinboshi.
>>237453Daieisho's ozeki run is dead. Calf injury, probable kyujo.
>>237454It was never really alive if we're being honest
kirikaeshi admirerhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xiE_SoZZptI
tomato
>>237476cant hate the tomate
Day 1 & 2 matchups are out.Dan vs Onosato on day 2Dan rematch against Zak on day 1
>>237489leave
>>237491kill yourself spammer
Lets declare danposting a crime
Tbh everytime I see Aonishiki poster I don't get mad, I remember the rabid kotonowaka fanboy who quit watching sumo when quad tits fumbled the yokozuna bid.And it makes me laugh.Let them do their thing, they'll stop eventually.>>237489That really is a rough first matches though, two of the heaviest possible matchups.
its daieishover
trannytame kaputendo ended
0
>>237442Probably toning down since there was guests
Mitabros we won! we're gonna get to sit next to Roga!
The ideal Day 1. If any of these bouts are wrong we can call it a clown basho.
>>237501I want Kotoshoho to do well because I like his big silly lips.
How the fuck do you even injure your calf while being pushed lmaoooo
>Endo got knee surgerysomewhat belated
>Nabatame kyujoSlop-bros...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fn86-dSrVMQhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhEnUaT54lULast prime slop before the basho I think. After this we starve
>>237504You just know he's been retardedly overdoing it in practice instead of saving some in the tank and that something tearing or breaking was inevitable
>>237514Sometimes these things just happen, especially once you hit your thirties. Daieisho isn't known for being injury-prone, and this is ruining his streak of consecutive appearances.
>>237504The person being pushed still has to resist. Look at the rear leg, the calf is put under a lot of tension.
>>236455Would a stable consider sending an international prospect to another stable in the ichimon?
If Daiesho doesn't get any wins, he's likely to drop all the way to m10 or m11. He's pretty old too, he might not recover fully ever. I'd hate to lose the guy, he's been a great fixture near the top of the banzuke.
>>237540Time wounds all heels. If he DOES get any wins, he might sideline himself for the rest of the year with an exacerbated injury. If he deserves to be at the top of the banzuke, taking a tournament off won't matter and he'll get back up there when he's healthy.
>>237540Lmao no, Daieisho is already favoured by Hakkaku, don't be surprised if he's kept at M5e so he stays in the joi for September.
New kesho mawashi for Onosato for his debut. Not gonna lie this mogs Hoshoryu.
>>237545>the rising sun over Mount FujiGuys, I think this Onosato dude might be Japanese.
>>237547Uhhh I'm pretty sure that Terunofuji means the sunrise over Mt Fuji.
>>237548The kami smote his knees as punishment for his master's hubris.
>>237549Wasn't it Tobizaru who brought about the Day of the Knee in the end?
>>237545DopeI love them
>>237550Every Nihonjin is a vessel for the divinity of the kami.
>>237512>ligament transplant>out for an entire year>starting from sandanme after thatwell, that explains why he was so downthat's shitty
>>237545>*Red Sun starts playing*
NHK has a new documentary feature about Dan airing
>>237560I can't believe danfag was a JSA plant
Grand Sumo Preview is up too
>>237560>ukraineBoring That was like 3 wars ago get with the times
>>237558>Nabatame, the results are in.>You'll be sitting next to Koga now...
>>237564>Koga >Sandanme
>>237558The real question is whether he should pack it in and take up another career while he's still fairly young. Even if he comes back, injuries never really heal.
>>237564This is Koga's year. 6-1 incoming.
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Really want Onosato to start wearing that red wing eye makeup when he dohyo-iris. And I want him to start screaming YOOOOOOOOOO when he stomps.
>25/314 people on stablemasters still have Daieisho picked>6 have EndoUh oh stinky!
Premature kinboshi celebration
>>237560>Onosato making his yokozuna debut>NHK ignores him, decides to make a special documentary about Aonishiki insteadDan can't stop winning
>>237574anything short of two kinboshers is a failure
>>237574On no planet is Abi beating Onosato. Their last two fights have just been embarrassing for Abi.
>>237572The best chef in sumo I think
>>237579Having someone who can throw onigiri together like it's nothing is neat.
>>237577Abi might be playing the long con, he knows he can't beat Onosato every time and that Onosato needs to be set up first if Abi has a chance of beating him. All the people who talk about Abi being a one dimensional flowcharter probably don't even watch the matches, he is one of if not the most cerebral and wily competitors in the sport.
>>237581That better be a joke because Abi is a walking flowchart.Also he's going 10+ wins this basho. Not only is Aonishiki free but Daieisho is out of the picture.
Only sekitori are referred to as -zeki, right?
>>237583はい
>Basho is out of Tokyo this time>Meanwhile, flooding in Tokyo
>>237587So is it confirmed that all Miyagino rikishi are going to stay at Isegahama permanently?
>>237587>7 sekitori including three of the current top prospects10% of all sekitori are at Isegahama. That's crazy considering there's 44 stables.
>>237588As things stand, there are no Miyagino rikishi. Isegahama-beya is, however, huge and unwieldy, and it's reasonable to suppose that if Magaki wanted to branch out, or someone like Takarafuji retired, some of the wrestlers would follow along. I don't think Isegahama will stay in its current configuration in the long term, but I'd guess a year at least before any changes.
>>237588We'll see Ishiura or Homarefuji branch off eventually.
>>237590>Isegahama-beya is, however, huge and unwieldyHeh, just like my dick.
>>237592>Anon is on a hot date>Takes his pants off>Atamifuji pops out
>>237594Atamifuji is the last rikishi you want popping out of your pants since he can't open his eyes. Here, have some British slang.https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Jap%27s_eye
>>237595You seem like a knowledgeable chap. Who's the first rikishi you want popping out of your pants?
>>237596Takakeisho. Fucking huge and gets the job done in 5 seconds.
>>237597Subarashii...
My wife must have Takayasu in her pants. Fat, hairy, and never gets to finish hahaha
>>237587my nigga Enhoe is still alive
>>237601But for how long?
>>237596Terutsuyoshi. Small and it throws a lot of white stuff
>>237597>then withers away to nothing
>>237605Haha yeah my dick is pretty small when it's not hard.
>>237587
>>237579>SAY!>MY!>NAME!
>>237611>Oompa-loompa-doopady-dee,>I've got for you another sekito-ri.
>>237612I'm British and have never seen a single human being with teeth as bad as Koga.
>>237615You obviously don't get out much. Koga's teeth aren't even all that bad, he should just have been given braces as a preteen. He could get braces now and that would solve the problem - there's no obvious signs of severe tooth decay, tartar, or gum disease, just the misalignment.
>>237589It made me laugh when I saw people comment that Isegahama was jealous of Hakuho when the merger happened when in fact Isegahama ran circles around every oyakata combined in terms of raw sekitori production capability.
it seems some bitch got really turned on by fujinokawa (wakaikari) making it into makuuchi
>>237617The JSA had to step in and use Hokuseiho as an "excuse" to prevent Miyagino from taking over Ozumo. In reality multiple beyas PER WEEK have incidents involving superglue.
>>237619>Miyagino taking overlollmaoKisenosato ran circles around Miyagino in that aspect.
>>237620I was dropping an epic meme on you, but for reals, the only thing K*senosato ever achieved as an Oyakata was recruiting Onosato because the JSA kept having wet dreams about the last Japanese Yokozuna raising the next great Japanese Yokozuna. All he ever had to do was tard-wrangle a fatso. Just look at the rest of Nishonoseki; it's an abysmal failure with only Shirokuma coming close to Makuuchi and even then he just can't do it.K*senosato has ONE worthwhile recruit who was handed to him on a silver platter. Guys like Asahifuji, Kise, and fuck it, even Ajigawa have done way better jobs than him. They actually had to DO a job.
>>237621Kisenosato had the power of anime behind him
>>237622https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WrZW8LzPLks&ab_channel=Maarike11THIS YOU IN THE RED MAWASHI???
>>237621Only the great Japanese yokozuna stood a chance at controlling the raw, elemental demon of might known as Onosato. Under anyone else's guidance, Onosato would be in prison.
>>237627>the great Japanese yokozunaTakanohana???
>>237621What an absurd argument. Its obvious that all you really want is to denigrate people because you could make the same dumb claim about any rikishi doijg anything. You're just an asshole.
>>237628No. His Majesty, First of his Name, Better-than-the-Mongol-Thugs, our own great Japanese Dai-Yokozuna, Kisenosato (PBUH).
>>237629K*senosato clearly didn't run rings around Hakuho as an Oyakata since Hakuho had multiple Makuuchi sekitori while K*senosato had the future Shirokuma (:O!!!) until Onosato was given to him for free.
>>237631One Yokozuna is worth a hundred Makuuchi.
>>237632It means nothing when the JSA handed it to him.
>>237625Never fails to put a smile on my face.
>>237633Onosato chose to join Nishonoseki. He could have chosen anywhere.
>>237635Yeah he chose to join Nishonoseki. While Hakkaku had a fucking gun to his head.
>>237625>brave Japanese warrior can only be beaten by dirty barbarian tricksSelf own
>>237631And Hakuho didnt do anything to develop their talents. They wouldve been sekitori anywhere.
>>237636Go to bed, Chris, it's late.
>>237638>And Hakuho didnt do anything to develop their talentsHe watered the "tree" of their talent ;)
>>237640Hokuseiho was a Kisenosato secret agent, tasked with holding Hakuho back.
>>237643>What should I do after I've obtained the superglue, K*senosato-sama???Nah, doesn't wash with me.
>>237644He was brainwashed beforehand to react in certain ways in the presence of trigger items. It was a painful and difficult process that left him unable to use both arms at once.
>>237621Miyanokaze & Kayo were both Kisenosato recruits
>>237646And yet neither are currently at Nishonoseki. Curious!
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>>237648Suck my balls through my boxer shorts faggot.
>>237648Not funny.
>>237649>>237650Let the Danfag have this one. It's less than two days before the basho starts, and when the basho ends, Dan will have either proven himself truly worthy of a thread or he will have been brutally humbled.
>>237651I still can't believe Ajigawa-Oyakata fucking shot Daieisho in the calf for having a positive record against Dan.
>>237651I think the over under on him for this one would be 7.5 wins. Daiesho being gone makes me lean more towards 8, but I could still see a MK happening if the high makuuchi show up. People like WMH and Ohou shouldn't be free for him.
>>237654Everyone Sekiwake+ should be an instant loss, as should anyone who's been able to hold the rank like WMH or Abi. Danfag aside, watching him is going to be the next best thing after watching the Yokozuna murder everyone.
>>237651retard>>236193>>236193>>236193
>>237655I'm mentally prepared for my guy WTK to let me down, so whether Aoinishiki will sink or swim will be the fun story line to follow instead.
>>237648Stop trying this and take a fucking hint already damn dude
