catberge edition
genruinely had a conversation with a mate of a mate who was a hardcore mask covid fanatic and omg you could kill someonewhile having this conversation we are outdoors in a beer garden and he is puffing fag after fagi'm like cant u see the irony
>>201569604about fucking time are you a fucking snail or what? don't let it happen again
we're all going to teach english in china then yea?
>>201569633piss off you fat fucking piece of shit don't ever speak to me like that again spastic clown
Any pattern recognition man in?
>>201569624the vaccine has killed more than cigarettes in the last 3 years
>>201569604MEW.MEOW.
>The far right is a "very real threat" which needs to be combatted, Sir Keir Starmer has said.>Speaking on a visit to Paris, the prime minister said the best way to deal with the "snake oil" of populism and nationalism was through "delivery" and "showing there are progressive, democratic answers to the many challenges we face is the way forward".>In his first month in No 10, Sir Keir faced a wave of riots across England and Northern Ireland fuelled by far-right, anti-immigration sentiment and misinformation online.>The PM said his concern stemmed partly from this summer's unrest in the UK, as well as the situation in other European countries including France and Germany, which have seen far-right parties make significant gains.https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/crkm8mg4md4o
>>201569641bad enough half the people about are wogs already, why would I move to china and 100% of them be?
>>201569604
>>201569656lol fuck that cunt we need another election
>>201569656yh
>>201569604Amazing webm
>be me>be the year of our lord 2024>have no gf>mfw
any drunk and want to kill themselves lads in?
>>201569671agreeddon't understand when people say shit like this>nooooo my country is going to be 50% brown 3rd worlders in the future!>time to move to thailand where its 100% brown 3rd worlders.
Please daddy Starmer tell me what I can and can’t do
Thinking of just doing a data analytics sql/tableau certificate my job will pay for it but it takes 9 months
>>201569688Sorry we won't have any more elections on account of ww3 aha
>>201569604Soon brothershttps://youtu.be/yyTZcKrMrEk?si=WxWrkVdR360PNGK6
thought it was a myth that the leaders of our countries would go back on all their promises and immediately become a tyrannical cunt upon attaining office, surely that kind of thing can't happen in the western world? not in the 21st century surely
>>201569735What’s to think about? Get it done
Everyone who doesn't vote for me is far-right.
>>201569735the time will pass regardless
>>201569713theres a clear difference between thai people and the detritus that come here
>>201569656Keir Starmer is an absolute cock goblin
i don't believe in god but i agree with that neil degrasse tyson negro, if the current year is based on the estimated birth of jesus then that needs to be acknowledged with BC and AD instad of this BCE and CE bullshit
but what about alcohol?
>>201569755Gonna buy the sequel lad?
might move to Moscow
>>201569757There won't be a french revolution people will just give up they will stop caring and they will no longer support the government
>>201569713Yeah. Everyone hates those damn Chinese immigrants here don’t they?
>>201569768>>201569783I suppose, I think part of it is I want a new job now and to increase my pay but I’m also realizing how few are available outside of highly specialized onesIn also a bit of a mong
NEWNOW
>>201569746mad but true. historians will look back on this era as pandemics, political ineptitude and violence, and economic uncertainty and they will attribute those things to the cause of WW3
remember kingdom come deliverance being the last game that i was genuinely impressed with the graphics of, the game was giving me an uncanny valley feeling
>>201569789>>201569847don't care mate. i don't want to live in a place which is majority-foreign. i want to live among english people. simple as
>>201569838>£700 a year
He’s going to ban wanking while driving soon at this rate.
>>201569879graphics are mid ahh
>>201569881Benidorm it is then
>>201569641for me it’s teaching English to school girls in Cambodia
It is utterly mad how people born in 2007 or later will never be able to legally buy tobacco anymore. It will just create another unregulated good sold by gangs on the black market
bring back are jez, thats what i say
>>201569836Sir henry the greatest knight
Mental how we tried to tell you mongs for years that Labour would be shit and yet you all just cried>b-b-but DA TOREES!!!
>>201569881>i don't want to live in a place which is majority-foreign.That’s why we’re moving lad
>>201569905>you absolutely HAVE to pollute your body with something and you HAVE to buy it from gangsters
>>201569921*mong-thumps you*
>>201569879mad how i happily play ps1 games and never think to myself that the graphics need to be better
>>201569933so you're going to move from a place in which english people will be a minority to a place that will have 0 english people whatsoever, aside from yougreat stuff lad
dipping your sandwich in soup. lindy
How much do teachers earn? Reckon I could do that so long as I controlled myself
*spaffs several thick ropes of cum*
going to take up smoking just to spite poo barmer
>>201569987>so long as I controlled myself
Imagine working in a cigarette company's advertising department lmao, I'll be there with my laptop just doing jack shit cos we can't advertise anywhere
>>201569539I imagine sobut if I were you I'd be spending that time eating loads of poke and fresh fruit and haupia
>>201569995goodness me
thpaino take a day off you gimp
>Here is how Keir Starmer’s approval rating has changed since a month ago.>Analysis of @Moreincommon_ polling between July 20th-22nd and 24th-27th August.https://x.com/jamesjohnson252/status/1828818308617142782
>>201569944people have been smoking for thousands of years lad, it not the place of some speccy robotic autist to take it away now
Came up with a good phrase lads, wanting to share it with you all. "Never has a mong been so wrong". Feel free to spread it and use it whereever hahaha
>>201570028OH NO NO NO LEFTYBROS
rorke delighted fags are being banned from the pub before realising it refers to cigarettes
>>201570028Women on a mad one
>>201569944>NNNOOOOOOOOO YOU CANT DECIDE BY YOURSELF WHAT YOU PUT INSIDE YOUR BODY>YOU HAVE TO LET THE GOVERNMENT DECIDE FOR YOU, YOU FUCKING STUPID CHUD!!!
me: sucks on a delicious fagpoo barmer:
Mental how there are women over 30 on dating apps who are still really picky. Do they not know it's basically over for them?
>>201569895i don't really care that much about graphics, i'm just saying it's weird how i used to be impressed by the graphics of some ps2 games and now it seems like video game graphics just aren't really getting better anymore
he'll ban wanking in pubs next. madness
Sir Woke Barmer is FINISHED
There's no doubt anymore than Keir is trying to dismantle any idea of ethnic pride amongst British people >name and shame the rioters in a fashion never before seen>spread immigrants throughout the country so English/Scottish/Welsh areas can no longer exist >destroy the traditional meeting places steeped in history and culture The pub thing especially he's going to go hard on, mark my words in the next couple of years there's going to be a big crusade against boozeRelentless articles of how bad it is for you, taxing breweries, taxing pubs similar the sugar tax
>>201569995*catches them all in my mouth like a dog going mad at a garden hose*
>>201570075irrelevant rambling
>>201570098Setting up a dating app profile and I'm just gonna be honest and say I'm lonely but still no single mothers please
surest sign of an immature incel is "if i were in power i would ban this"
>>201570098>Do they not know it's basically over for them?It isn't, though. Those women have a bit more life left in them.
>>201570100Diminishing returnsHumanity peaked at the turn of the millennium
Get it legalised
>Every Monday 6pm to 10pm>The UK’s original club for men who like Jacking Off! You can wank or watch, it’s up to you! We get all manner of lads in from 18 to 80, but unlike other clubs were attitude free and don’t judge people! All we want you do is have a good time. We attract gay, straight and bi-curious lads who want something a little different than just the usual sex and cruise clubs. Here you can join in as much as you want or just chill out in the bar and watch the world go by!We have plenty of space, sofa seats to line up in, a Jack Off platform where you can “edge” your mates or hold your old bukkake session. There is the darker Jack Room for the shy and the cabins for the really shy with their glory holes. Jack Circles welcome!>1: No lips below the hips 2: No unwanted groping 3: No bumsex.>There are other clubs for that elsewhere in the capital. If you are caught you will be told to stop or leave the venue. fancy a Brit meet here?
I think once we have VR worlds with self-generating AI then it's over for humanity ladsWhy bother interacting with people outside when you can strap on some goggles and live in a world of your own exact preferences interacting with characters who live and learn along the way
>>201569604I hate these videos with fat castrated house cats with the dull eyes and complete lack of energy. Or cats dressed in cats' clothes or le funny costumes. There's no animal in there anymore. This is just captivity and torture. Proper domestication is letting a cat roam around your farm and feeding it when you see it once a day (optional).Sorry just needed to vent.
>>201570100>>201570163There really isn't any technology invented past the year 2006 that has improved human lives in any way whatsoeverWe could revert back exactly to how we were 20 years ago and stay there indefinitely, and we'd all be much better off
>>201570163I can see all 56000 triangles
>>201570193>a Jack Off platform where you can “edge” your mates howling
>>201570163I'm a man of 60 triangles
>>201570163mad how this bullshit image is still being reposted by gormless divs
>>201570196I'm not a soulless mentally ill bugman so I shan't be doing that.
>>201570220When will you finish the Parthenon, it's been 2500 years
>>201570220Oopsie
Any gluttonous slug men
Mental how not a single person in the country even said a word about banning smoking in pub beer gardens before this morning and now it's going to happen as govt policybonkers
>>201570196Why aren't you a heroin addict currently
>>201570256why's it bullshit
>A man who died after being assaulted at Southwark Underground station has been described by his family as a "gentle, kind, quick-witted and funny" person whom they looked forward to seeing again in heaven.>Sam Winter, who was 28, was attacked at about 21:30 BST on Thursday 22 August. He was taken to hospital in a critical condition, but died on Saturday.>"He was a qualified physiotherapist, AI engineer and a volunteer with several charities. His family and friends will remember him as gentle and kind, quick-witted and funny, with deep faith and an unendingly giving spirit.
>>201570256>I am so very smart aha I must post *yawns in your ugly, stupid face*
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c39k44n8j1mois letby about gonna get released?
my jobcentre coach is a pakiwhat means?
>>201570297Too neek and shut-in to get any
>>201570098Female friend of mine who is 31 and broke off an engagement has over 2000 likes on tinder since getting back on it a few months ago and has shagged loads of fellasshe's not even fit
>>201570307
>He was a qualified physiotherapist, AI engineer and a volunteer with several charitiesThe grifting Holy Trinity.
>>201570314Yes because we live in a clown country which believes women should never be punished even if they literally murder babies.
>>201570216just mental to me how there was a time well within my lifespan to remember it where people weren't constantly glued to screens and you could smoke pretty much anywhere and say racial slurs and make fun of homosexuals and no one would care, feels like a distant second-hand recollection of ages past and yet i actually lived itwonder what i'd be like at this age if i'd been born 20 years earlier
>>201570318My coach is a diminutive young woman from Ghana who I can't understand half the time but still imagine being sat on by
>those wailsOOFhttps://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cj62dkekz74o
>>201570334any of them bbc?
>>201570306>>201570311
spamming/flooding
>>201570379>Spent so long making this when all it does is reinforce the initial point
Funny how
>>201570307>physiotherapist, AI engineerjesus make up your mind buddy, this is probably why he died because he's an indecisive prick
>Illegal: Having a ciggy and a cold pint in the pub garden after work on a Friday>Legal: Raping and stabbing kidsBit of a mad one really
>>201570361does she help you get a job
>>201570416it doesnt though, if you had a brain you would understand that
>>201570318my coach makes up reasons I'm on phone call only messages cause she's worried I'm gonna throttle someone at the job centre, it's bullshit, I enjoy the walk desu
>>201570160They can still get their arse rattled at the drop of a hat but their profile saying "want kids someday" is the biggest cope.If you're a woman in a long term relationship and you're 30+ then there's still time to have kids but you've got to start really thinking about when (and in the near future)If you're a single woman and 30+ wanting kids then OOOF, fucking MASSIVE OOOF. One way ticket to being a single mother when that bloke you've known for 6 months fucks off to Malaga with Dean and Scotty
>>201570422a dinosaur will never have intercourse with a human
Peter Hitchens is right about addiction btw
>>201570434Huh
>>201570444Have you tried not being an aggressive incel?
>>201569987'
>>201570216ipad
>>201570444>she's worried I'm gonna throttle someone at the job centreWhy? What did you do to get such a reputation?
>>201570511Throttled someone at the job centre
Snapped on Love Island, love some mischief me
>>201570497The benefits it provided to humans were tiny compared to the massive negative effects it had on society as a whole.
a black gf would fix rorke
>>201570486Takes one to know one
do I go for a messy justice that will come back to hit me(group dynamics) or accept someone's shitty behaviour for the sake of peace? my head hurts lads
Job coach used to let me do whatever I want when I was on benefits. Probably because I just turned up, didn't stink of weed or threaten anyone and filled in some made up bullshit on my job search record thing.Never once asked about me actually getting a job. Just had a nice chat and she ticked the boxes saying I'm looking.
dentistberg gave me a weird look when I put on my headphones and music during the filling
>>201570543ipod
I'm still using a computer from years agoIt's all a meme
Middle East Crisis Israel Kills Militant Leader in 2nd Day of West Bank Raid
talked myself out of every plan and every dream i've ever had. spent years doing nothing because doing something might have been less than perfect
>>201570595https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/IPod>Release date November 10, 2001
>>201570577>saying I'm lookingGood looking?
>>201570577Do you have to provide any proof that you're looking for jobs (Application received emails, etc)?
>>201570463NoAddicts have different brains
>>201570601Doesn't matterNone of this matters
>>201570572The shitty behaviour affects you, does it? If you can speak to someone else and you think you can get them on to your side I would try that. Would help if you do decide to raise the issue
Anyone else remember Croc?
>>201570636based
>Grand Rapids mother charged as toddler dies in ‘horrific’ child abuse case
>>201570601IktfbYour parents demand perfectionism which caused your procrastination and fear or failing
>>201570614wii u
>>201570638no they don't
>>201570486>>201570511I'm not an aggressive person. I've been sacked for hitting someone. multiple instances of getting violent at work. it's simply a response to bullies. I asked them to stop being twats but they don't do it. eventually I snap
>>201570636Ok this made me laugh but I can't share it on the Discord, so here's a high five for you mate. *high fives you*
>>201570672GameCube was better
please stop replying to him
>Rotorua child Kendra Scanlon died after oven tipped on her, coroner rules
>>201570616I'm alright. Also kill yourself>>201570631This was years ago so I don't know what it's like now. Used to just go on the website and fill in a blog sort of thing with your record of looking and applying for jobs. I just made it up
>>201570679Yes they do please educate yourself
Ai voice toil again today lads. NEED an AI girlfriend NOW!!!
>>201570684I feel the same way. I have Intermittent Explosive Disorder and have been arrested multiple times in my life for attacking people that I felt had wronged me. Nobody understands it and just assumes I'm an evil cunt who likes hurting people or something. But I'm not, I have a mental disorder, no different to anybody who has something like depression or anxiety or ADHD and can't control its symptoms
high fat diet.........hair loss
>>201569881thisis it too much to ask for an Englishman to be able to live amongst his fellows? foreign is foreign, don’t care how palatable they are to you they’re not English and never will be
It's a 'nonce or be nonced' world out there, officer
One day meek runtOther day exploding like a psycho
>>201570726You are extremely mentally ill. Get help.
Sir Twat Fuckysucky
You really can't suffer in Mother Russia. Angelic beauties everywhere and all the men look like ogres
>>201570751Non whites can be english
Wagwan officer, you already seen my balls batty and dick
>>201569604I tried persona 4 and it seems so stupid
>>201570750REALLY!!???
>>201570653it annoys me, and tanks my morale. speaking up will get me heated and in a shit mood for days. I don't expect anyone to be on my side. was gonna report to HR, they'll know who it came from if they get punished. someone has already offered to back me but I don't want to get anyone in the group involved too
>>201570785Takes one to know one
Guarantee that by 2030 we'll be having discussions about using a covid-style track and trace app to limit the amount of alcohol people can buy per day/week/whatever measurement and in line with govt guidance on units
>>201570814bumbaclooot*sucks teeth*
>>201570837Why do you think its stupid
>>201570813no they can’t you daft wogthe English people exist as an ethnicity, taking in the excrement of the world and dressing them in English colours doesn’t make them english
>>201570846you're already having a discussion about it right now, doesn't mean it will happen
>>201570846I could see that happening, and it'll be absolutely farcical when it coincides with weed becoming fully legalised and stoners stinking up the streets 24/7
my work coach is a scottish woman who I would happily pump full of cum she's got big tits and a curvy figure, quite tall, 40 something years old. she's so fit
>>201570838Yeah not memeing
>>201570885why aren't you off dying in battle?
>>201570840Shitty situation mate. I don't know the full details but from my POV you may as well tell HR because it'll get something done instead of leaving you stewing like this. If the HR guys and girls are a responsible bunch they'll figure something out
The 'bab is in
>>201570908They fighting in Cheshire now?
>>201570743it's hard for us, they don't know how much we punish ourselves and ponder our actions. there's nothing wrong with getting angry, they see my get annoyed talking about sensitive issues and think I'm gonna flip a table
>>201570908i'm in crimea
>>201570865horrible
>>201570928corrr
>>201570928get a life
Playing ck3I'm best friends with the king of Scotland and Ive just killed all his sons so mine will inherit the throneHe's still 100+
>>201570846is it mate? haha yeah thats mad *gets up and walks away*
>>201570942crimea river
if two Scottish people had a kid who was born in England he would still be Scottishhowever as soon as it’s a third worlder by magic the child becomes English
>>201570899Coooorrrrrr tell me where your Jobcentre is, need a good mature Scottish shag x
want to kill myself but not before i get the chance to play gta 6, hope they don't delay it to 2026 or later because i cannot wait that long
>>201570928fuckin 'ell looks good. Never had it
>>201570928looks like elton john lost part of his rectum
>>201570942it's called the black sea mate it's not a river
>>201570928Peng ngl
LEGALISE DA TING STARMER
>>201570955Banged his arse to bed
>>201570942Really? How is life?
>>201570861It's like this game was designed for little kids
Reckon I would have killed myself by now if I wasn't such a lazy sod lol
>>201570895This is what I don't getWhy are all the social activities the ones they hate and asocial shit like getting stoned at home will be acceptable?
Legalise dating storber
>>201570938>they see my get annoyed talking about sensitive issues and think I'm gonna flip a tableSame, I remember years ago being with some mates and I raised my voice for a joke and they all went silent and stared at me because they thought I was actually kicking offAnd at uni I remember a girl I knew messaging me after I put up a photo on snapchat of me with a beer because she thought I shouldn't be drinking because of my anger issuesHate how people treat me like a child because of something I cannot control
>>201571017why? is your life really that bad?
sir beer gardener
>>201570957No he'd be English
>>201571057...yh
>>201571054not controlling your anger is literally childishas is making up a label to justify it
I have questions
>>201571036i know mate, it's globohomo clownpozzed troonworld gone mad innit
when will there be a decent torrent for alien romulus
>>201571068kek good one
is woody allen really a neurotic nerd who likes to sleep with little girls?
>>201571101ask jeeves
>>201571054You're annoying from very little exposure
house cleanedbedding washedhmm... ahah... oh yes... it's booze o' clock... xD
>>201571006bad, but not so bad like in Dumbass
>>201571101not until october most likely
thinking about smug milves
If I want to walk down the street with my fag then I WILL
Any of you live in a haunted house
>>201571036I noticed this during covid. All these people and these journalists talking about how we should live in a "new normal" where nobody would go to pubs or socialise IRL anymore because of the threat of diseases. And how there was nothing wrong with that and it would just be "a new way of living". The people who were pushing that back then haven't given up on that idea, they're just finding new ways to force it now there's no pandemic anymore
>>201571099Fuck off
>>201571071lmao no he wouldn’t I personally know Scot’s and Irish that are born here don’t consider themselves English at all, but you try telling that to them
>>201571101saw it at the cinema, it was shitliterally just a rerun of every Alien film that came before it
>>201570724There is no such thing as addiction, kill yourself.
>>201571155Got a mirror in my bedroom that always gives me a fright
will YOU be buying tickets to the irish diaspora band reunion?
"jej". you don't see that one much anymore
>>201571149what's his name?
>>201571155I think I live in a haunted flat, hear a lot of banging sounds and moaning at night and a strange voice calling out 'jamalllll, oh jamallllllll'Jamal lives above meWonder if he knows if he's being haunted
>>201571183benson hedges
>>201571196get a life
>>201571180They're fascists apparently
>>201571086It's a real mental disorder though. I cannot control ithttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intermittent_explosive_disorderhttps://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/intermittent-explosive-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20373921
>>201571196sn
>>201571171mate the loony left are going to force us to smoke weed instead of tobacco in order to stop us socializing, its political correctness gone mad
pull my finger
I got all As and *s at my GCSE, but I didn't do any of my ITC courswork (just couldn't be arsed), and a teacher told me to keep it a secret and did my work for me and gave me an *
>>201571213you should be locked up in an institute
Delicious Tacos is right about everything
>>201571210the same state that imported millions of pakis at the same time?
>>201571241FOLC
>>201571174Loved the first AlienNever liked the sequels
Might turn it all around and make my family proud. Can't really be arsed though can I
>>201571233>>201571099How do you justify why the UK and several other countries all seem to be clamping down on alcohol/tobacco at the same time as relaxing restrictions on weed and harder drugs?
THE NEW NORMSAME AS THE OLD NORM
>Breaking: Keir Starmer to ban takeaways after 9pm
>>201571236*tenderly sucks your finger, maintaining eye contact as I do so*
>>201571241On the basis that you would suck his cock, yes?
>>201571261Ummm.... yes
imagine your pavlovian response to "haunted house" being a black man having sex
>>201571286the muslim lobbyists wouldn't allow that
They're banning outdoor smoking and using the 'state of the NHS' to justify itWe live to service the NHS now, basically
>>201571262I'm 32
>>201571273i know mate its literally communism, exactly what that yuri whats his name lad was warning us about
if banning outdoor smoking saves just one life it is worth doing
I think the one thing that's stopping me from inviting a prostitute into my flat is the possibility that they'll smell bad and make my bed smell bad for ages
yeah great article aha yeah nice stuff! ooh a twitter screenshot too? nice, yeah!
>>201571326cigarettes makes up a tiny number of cancer & COPD deaths in comparison to the number of cancer deaths caused by processed food every yearbut the governement won't do anything about that
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNG
>>201571210How many special people change?How many lives are livin' strange?Where were you while we were sieging heil?Slowly walkin' down the hallFaster than a cannonballWhere were you while we were sieging heil?
>>201571297keep your grotesque fantasies to yourself
>>201571366Your bed already smells bad you freak
i need to be myselfi cant be no one else
>>201571340thought the fella was a literal pig at first glance
>>201571333Are you going to actually respond seriously at any point, or are you just going to take the piss?
squirming around on the floor like a worm
whats spaino up to lads?
>>201571210Imagine being this disconnected from reality.
>>201571416posting on /brit/ for 16 hours every single day whilst also pretending to have a wife and a job
Doing numbers in the (You) trade today lads
sir keir starmer to ban scavenging fagends from train stations in scotland
>>201571415If I cut you in half will there be two of you haha x
>>201571436spainfreak
>>201571436how does it feel being a venal sex obsessed little mollusk of a man?
some guy you've never heard of said a thing online
>>201571439-.-
>>201571467I'm outraged
>>201571431calm down
>>201571416-> >>201571436
>>201571475mousey!!!!
>>201571489don't like the truth do you adam
>>201571464I'm quite a large mollusk actually
explain why we gave women political and social rights again?
sudden influx of extremely low quality posts
>>201571511because they're half the population
>>201571403mate the wef are going to force us all to smoke weed and become gay so we need to support are nigel and are tommy fighting against pozworld
he's nothing but a conceited reptile of a man
>>201571511"we"don't recall being jewish personally
>>201571511for the nookie
>>201571506What are you up to tonight lad? Got the Mrs over later
toby tantrum loading ...0% [||||||-----] 100%
>>201571539Spainnonce
>>201571522Not seeing the syllogism here mate, sorry.
>>201571517All me
Any lovely arses in here need shagged? I’ll get it done for you.
Provided I can step out the front of the boozer with my drink and have a cig I'm not too bothered desu
>>201571567you'll see a sillygasm in a minute pal
mad how spainnonce was actually on an unironic holiday with his 'rents when he was posting from spainas a 30+ year old man
*surreptitiously googles "syllogism"*
>>201571610>>201571610>>201571610
>>201571590always the same printed signs at every government supporting protest
laaaaadsoh laaaaaa-aaaadsthere's no newwwww
>>201571639think you'll find there is actually
>>201571054people lack empathy for what they can't/haven't experienced afterall. it sucks
