the new as it were edition
Buttplugs an' that
got a giant bruise on the back of my head
have ordered take-away for the past 5 days in a row and honestly feel disgusted with myself
just had a class jam on the guitar, ladslove the feeling, it's an actual proper hobby instead of posting on this cretinous websiteneed to play it more often desu
>>202058645blog on
>>202058645Bet it was just you fingering A Minor wasn't it
Hotel HL Rondo. Av. de Tirajana. Above the Restaurante Allende 22º. Second floor landing. 7PM. Be there.
>>202058641i hardly order them anymore now, they're simply too expensive
gay porn? I watch that poo? I eat that syphoned off sewage from the girls' school pipelines? I drink that I'm not a rapper
why was he on a mission to find mr warren g and why didn't he just call him
>>202058645mate how do you coordinate the bloody fingers can never hit the right strings
We have just released a fresh batch of prisoners from HMP Wandsworth. We now have enough room for dissidents of The Regime.
finna bouta get a post ending in 7 no cap fr on god
>>202058679practice
>>202058602shove em up your arse!
>>202058679Bending the fret board
>>202058679I guess my high IQ just lets me do anything I put my mind to
>>202058686Check my 4
fingering my arsehole til I cum poo
just had some class jam on the guitar, ladslove the feeling, it's an actual proper hobby instead of posting on this cretinous websiteUsed strawberry this time but think I'll get some raspberry for tomorrows liking session.
>>2020587524chan peaked here
>James Cleverly favourite to top MPs’ poll as Tory leadership contest takes surprise twistYeah they’re not serious
sucking on a big lovely mug of bovril
Pool’s closed.
>>202058783Whoever it is gets deposed before the next election.Might as well be a vote on who's the next member of sugababes
>>202058741Why’s he like this
Pensioners up in arms because a £300 gib is now means-tested and won't be given to literal millionairesIn other news state-pensions (not means tested) are set to increase by £500Greedy fucking cunts
>>202058828Labour trying to kill off tory voters en masse
>>202058828show some fucking respect they died in the trenches for your right to moan so dont moan
Can I join the army reserve if I'm on anti-depressants?
My fellow reds, we must let in more grey squirrels to our forests
>>202058826mental illness
>>202058828Remember when the Tories literally tried to kill every pensioner by not locking down quick enough
>>202058848probably must be desperate to take anyone these days
Sir Granny Freezer
>>202058857Grey squirrels have good food btw
>>202058848No, I tried and was rejected on medical for that reason.
>>202058848The army gets pumped full of amphetamines before any mission anyway
Sir Balls Crusher
So if Cleverly tops the list then I guess he’s got all/most of Patel’s votes which makes sense Guessing all of tugenthat would go to Jenrick or vice versaNo idea about stride and assume Kemi’s would be split considering she’s part of the ‘based black people’ faction it conservatives Interesting >>202058819I can’t imagine the current tories would be that effective
>>202058848>>202058898how grim are your prospects in life that you'd try join the army
Homosexuals are gay
Dont understand why the triple lock has to be tied to increased wages. If workers are earning more money which should that mean that pensioners should also get more? Especially since its already tied to inflation. Its not like theyre getting poorer if they dont increase a long with wages - so whats the point?
>>202058933Reserves, just thought it looked like a decent way to spend one evening a week. Like how I used to go to Scouts once a week as a kid
>>202058933Army reserve only, I'd keep my current job.>>202058898Did they say just the medicine or because you're a mental?
done a gay bum fart
PAJEET
I really seriously hope the tories choose a negro for leader and reform takes all their votes, cba for some lukewarm nigga to take over and split the reform vote
Just applied for a runt job. It is officially over. Soon I shall be working 40 hours a week in a miserable job.Might even rent a shitty 1 bedroom flat somewhere to rest in between shifts before I inevitably hang myself in the grotty little bathroom.
>>202058969Officially it was the meds. You can't be in on a medication you need daily, so if you're theoretically deployed and can't access it you're fucked. Same reason they say you can't have diabetes and need insulin and certain allergies bar people.
Kemi's curried goat farts
grim thread so far
>>202057013mate there's literal homeless in this general
just ordered the Sony WH-1000XM5-WHCH720N-WF1000XM5-CH520’s
>>202058991>a shitty 1 bedroom flat somewhere to rest in between shifts before I inevitably hang myselfthis is why I’m scared to get a job again and eventually move out, I seriously think I’ll kill myself
>>202058991hope it wasn't a call centre
>>202059023I'm a WHCH720N man myself
>>202059029good solution to that is getting a good job that doesn't make you want to top yourself
Where’s mousey?? :P
Kamala or Trump? Who you got chat?
>>202058994Ah that makes sense. Also probably wouldn't want to be deployed as I currently earn more than most soldiers (just looked it up and I'd need to be a Major to be even close lol).
>watch kino from the 90s or early 00s>geek knows everything about computers>ordinary person doesn't know the basics of internet or computer usecrazy how once internet was only for a select few, not billions of normies
>>202059030Worse. Amazon. Not even a driver, sorting dildo packages in a warehouse somewhere.
>>202059067had that job and it isn't actually as bad as you think it is apart from around the christmas period
>>202059053doesn't feel like there's much momentum for big doncertainly not the same energy as when he won before. Then again I'm not in the USA so I don't know what the feeling is there, where it counts
Doing a watch
>>202059008*walks up behind you and slings my arms over your shoulders and gives you a hug from behind. I lean forward so as to speak into your ear. "What are you doing up so early, babe?" I breathily whisper in your ear. My hand slips from around your shoulder and travels south from your chest to your stomach, feeling the details of your muscles and it travels further and further South. "Come back to bed, hunny." I kiss your neck while my hand slips into your Chelsea FC PJ bottoms*
>>202059067youre the one judging me when you put my name and address sticker on my parcel of gay poo buttplugs
It’s a Dark Academia type of day
>>202059088Deigo unmasked
>>202059086Last time it was fun because President Trump was an absurd concept and people wondered what it might look like. Then it happened and now it's not fun anymore
The first acts of the first Jewish PMUnlimited support to illegal immigrantsRemove what was a £600 tax break to the elderlyTax private pensionsIncrease taxes on single people, disproportionately affects young native men and old peopleMake criticism of immigrants illegalFund wars to kill children So this is what Jews do
>>202059083Don't understand what the job is to be honest, website didn't say much. Surely it's not just 8 hours of putting parcels into bags? A robot or a conveyer belt with an overhead scanner could do that
If I worked at Amazon, I'd infect all the buttpubs with gay aids
>>202059132See ya in three decades chuddy
>>202059127It’s literally that
>brit thinks starmer is the first Jewish PMOh dear
>>202059127yeah you pretty much described it, its easy as fuck but it is very boring the tedium will be the worst part but we did have the radio on so at least you can zone out listening to thati'd take it over a call centre job any day of the week
>>202059193Tony Blair was the first Prime Minister after the continuity reboot, any before him aren't canon anymore
>>202059053
>>202059193Yes he is
>>202059210haha classic wayne x
fell up a flight of stairs just then
>>202059207who draws this shite?americans are so weird man
Mad how Trump almost got murdered but all Ive heard about since is how well Karmakarmakarmakarmakarma Chameleon is doing
>>202059299sexo
>>202059310>Mad how Trump almost got murderedDon't recall that happening?
Kampala HarrisA woman who practices the Indian religion and has an Indian name claims she is a black American
>>202059114
>>202059172>>202059204Grim. Suppose that's why it pays more than any other job I've had
got suspended from toil with payget in
>>202059344indians are an opportunistic species of scam artists. Back in the day they would claim to be white to get societal benefits, and now they claim to be black
>>202059389Are you a police officer or something
You lot are just asking to incur the janny’s wrath and receive a 2 day and 23 hour long seeing to.
>>202059310is she the nominee now? ain't been paying attention, yank politics are old hat
>>202059398>they
>>202059402ASIO agent
Now that lilacs are in bloomShe has a bowl of lilacs in her roomAnd twists one in her fingers while she talks.'Ah, my friend, you do not know, you do not knowWhat life is, you who hold it in your hands';(Slowly twisting the lilac stalks)'You let it flow from you, you let it flow,And youth is cruel, and has no remorseAnd smiles at situations which it cannot see.'I smile, of course,And go on drinking tea.
>>202059404Kamala is bratbrat summer is overergo Kamala is over
might do some trauma dumping
i just be out here chillin man
smartschoolboy9
>>202059469me when my boss asks why i've done fuck all at toil today
my hobbies have become fixing/building shite around/for my lot
matesmadrimental illness
mental how fit they are
la bêtise n'est pas mon fort
think i might write some poetry later
>>202059380almost too peng ffs
mundanemouldymentally ill
i eat almost every day
>>202059545Who?
>>202059577This is me but with drinking waterIt's getting to be a habit
>>202059594athletes
wanking to colombians
>>202059634why
can’t control my road rage
>>202059634
>>202059658Do you need to?
reading all the nonsense on /r/europe
>>202059667I think so yeah
>>202059669gwaarn throw us a screenshot lad
>>202059669the average redditor scares me
lots of videos on youtube of people farting while making eye contact with strangers in public
For pre-lunch I am having a cup of tea with two dark chocolate digestives
>>202059669Wonder what r/unitedkingdom talk about about now the Tories are out
>>202059702Dunno why but finding wankable stuff on SFW sites is extra arousing for me
Glade need to invent something you shove up your arse that makes your poots smell goodArse wick
>>202059634That Colombian tranny is the only one I've ever wanked to I'm ashamed to say
>>202059730yeah that's why i love the surströmming challenge
>>202059723They're probably going on about how Tories have ruined the Labour party
this has been the worst /brit/ this month and thats saying something
>>202059762what makes you say that
call me a sleeping tablet the way i be destroying the woke
>>202059380Cambridge has a ridiculous amount of Chinese people, and every day there's some silent Falun Gong organ harvesting protest on.
Does the Henry V cut work in 2024?I might bring it back. Start a trend and shit.
>>202059752
>>202059778boring posts, moving far too slow, too many yank posts
£8.50 worth of fryup down the hatch
>>202059796Maybe but you'd have to be extremely attractive
>>202059802love a boring post megot no personalities in which i find a treat
>>202059786the big thing recently was the huge anti-judaism encampment they set up outside king's college
>>202059692Too much to capture in a single image, would have to make a collage.Most striking is that apparently everything that goes awry within the EU is some russian machination now.Also everyone keeps bringing up the US even on unrelated topics.
>>202059619this but alcoholic beverages
>>202059830Fucking students, it's all women doing this too, the men only go along with it in the hopes they'll get a shag out of it.
>>202059796What do you reckon?
>>202059833when will society come back to its senses
>>202059808For you
Few peoples i hate more than the Chechens and Dagestanis Just cause the Americans pay them big money to wrestle and punch people in rings makes everyone overlook what scum they are
democracy when the country is under the stewardship of home-owning rich cunts is worse than a dictatorship, tyranny by boomers
>>202059888I of course acknowledge that they are human shite but can't say I've ever come across one
>>202059888>Chechens and Dagestanisdidnt know we had them herenever met one
allah snakbars
don't really understand that gimmick where you make 3 posts in the thread and no pays you any attention but you keep making posts anyway trying to get attention
imagine making love to a woman
>>202059904>>202059906we don’t, but i’ve seen all the videos and media about them not one redeeming factor properly ugly fuckers as well
question londonfagsnew toilberg is muslimdo I get him a gift for 9/11 tomorrow or would a simple congrats suffice?
>>202059948not really a gimmick unless you keep posting the same thing and don't take the hint
>>202059968job isn't finished yet so a good luck is probably more appropriate
>>202059959oh shut up you smeghead*studio laughter*
>>202059890>home owning rich cuntswho exact are you talking about here? the vast majority of hone owning boomers are not rich
>>202059904>>202059965are they just violent savages then?
gay porn and its consequences
might load up the old Civ 6
>>202060014yeah but they own a house which becomes more and more of an impossibility by the day
>listening to song I listened to a lot when I was going through a bad time makes me feel shit nowNot a fan
Never forget what they took from you
>>202059869what senses? must be nice
>>202060082don't remember ever owning the state of South Africa and having it taken away from me I should probably speak to someone about that
>>202060096>cutest woman on this platform
>>202059959Rimmer was in good shape.
>>202059959cant do itgenuinely cantthe idea that a woman wants my cock inside her is so utterly unfathomable you might as well ask me to be a bati can sorta intellectually do it but it's meaningless
fucking hell this is huge, just got a bourbon where one of the biscuits is the wrong way round so that the bit that says "BOURBON" is up against the chocolate cream instead of on the outside
gimmick idea: krytenposting
>>202060181Mums arse looks like this when she's walking around in just a tshirt all the time
39 vs. 38why
inside every /brit/thread there are two australians:the 'good lad' australianthe 'I hope [insert horrible thing happening]' australian
>>202060181um
>>202060137not on
>>202060211right has peasant genes, a lot of footballers do
>>202060181dont think this is permitted
might hire a brown servant to come hand deliver me goyslop
>>202060212i'm generally neither but i have been both on certain occasions, and i'm probably one of the most active australian posters, if not the most
>>202060211wayne doesn't give a fuck
>>202058848nah but you can join the boring brigade
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d2zNSjvdeUU
>>202060211Would rather look like Rooney at 40 desu. If I'm old I'd rather look a strong builder than like a gay cruise ship entertainer
>>202060275for me, it's good ladding people
the goons are out
>>202060301bad lad
>>202060296utter tripe you're talking
feeling playful
>>202060296what is this cope
everyone spelling each others names wrong on email chain i presume out of spite
>>202060208why's your mum walking around like that, dirty sow
might become a volunteer fireman, apparently you need a manual driving licence though and i can only do automatic, how hard is it to learn manual when you're used to auto?
>>202060356bold to assume you get to drive the big red truck
always imagine some cartoon villain sending out his goons when spaino cuckposts about them
>>202060338>>202060345Not though is it. Name one male celebrity over 45 that looks good being lean
I've got some "goons" here for ya heheheh
>>202060366i probably won't, but the job requires the manual licence nevertheless
>>202060337
just spent 250 on some new glasses because I accidentally went to a pricey shopI didn't want to autistically try them on fifty times so I just picked one and paid, hope I like them
Hired goons?
>>202060356Just put it in first whenever the car is stopped and then move up a gear whenever it makes a funny noise. Pretty easy
>>202060356only takes a few hours to grasp manual if you're an experienced driver to begin with
>>202058569
>>202060387rapist
>>202060409lets have a little look
sometimes when i'm out i think to myself "doing a poo" and start giggling
hate driving manual, driving stresses me out enough can barely focus on changing the gears why should you have to move a little knob if you want to slow down
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hx8wAKioVSA
>>202060435...nhtakes a week for them to come anyways
There's no way the Tory membership are going to vote in another minority surely?
>>202060426https://www.youtube.com/shorts/2h55IbwEPAg
>>202060455>driving stresses me out enoughcannot for the life of me understand people like this
>>202060181vile
>>202060409utterly bizarre post
>>202060212which category does the one yob with nordVPN who larps and makes shit up constantly, switching vpns to reply to himself, and is on all hours of the day?
>>202060453it's the little things in life x
>>202060476you're operating heavy machinery and are only a slight hand movement away from death most of the time
>>202060490why is it
>>202060467Technically they never had. Liz Truss won the last vote.
>>202060455you shouldn't be driving tbqh
>>202060476intersections and stuff make me nervous, cant really help it im naturally paranoid and skittish
it's the little knobs in life x
>>202060467Be very silly if they did. Shall only be voting for the most racist white man going forward after this whole Starmer debacle
>>202060455if I might interject, one cannot "drive" a manual. A manual is a book of sorts, perhaps you meant "read"? Duolingo has some great language courses you might perchance consider...
never been in a car accident in real life, i crash a lot in grand theft auto but that's only because i'm almost always speeding x
>>202060526thought he was on the chase there
>>202060518have you ever had your iq tested? maybe they can give you some coping mechanisms for other people with low iq
Mental we had a Paki prime minister yet he was probably the most based one this century
>>202060467They never didSunak was forced in with a rule change that specifically made it that so only he could be a candidate
>>202060504yeah but everyone else seems to manage whilst knowing that fact
>>202060517why not
>>202060539I'm about to "chase" you from one side of Luxembourg to the other you little shitshould only take 10 minutes
>>202060491whatever category spaino and the belgium flag reside in
>>202060543most people I've found to be afraid of driving are high-IQ neurotics thought
>>202060570bit aggressivesay sorry now
>>202060585I'm SORRY that you EXIST
cold sleepy and erectbodys confused
might stick my finger up my bum
Mr Bean. Funny
>>202060598come on now leave the poor fellow alone
My IQ is 140 and I will often do dry-runs at night when the roads are empty if I need to drive somewhere I haven't been before.
just got rinsed by the dentistberg for a so called 'hygeine session' ffs
Get the bubble butt trained and sculpted.
>>202060616I'm involving him in the conversation and culture of the thread
>Greggs, better known for its sausage rolls, is launching a jewellery collection
>>202060582holy cope
>>202060623No it's not, behave
>>202060623>dry-runswat
noticed people on brit are often intimidated by those with a higher iq than them and lash out
>>202060623even if the location is really far away? is there a limit on how far you're willing to travel for this?
>>202060623You'll save petrol just looking at your intended route on google maps, same effect.Always like to know what lane I'll need to be in well in advance, me.
>>202060661no i'm not you STUPID CUNT
>>202060661me? a humble 100, even 99 perhaps
>>202060585I'm so sorryI-III-I-III-II I'm soooSooo-ooo-ooo-ooo-o-o-rryWHY DO YOU COME HEREwhen you know it makes things hard for mewhen you go?Oh, why do you post
safety: always off
>>202060671me in the 2.1%
>>202060653The shite dolescum spend money on Like those Lidl shoes from a few years ago and air fryers
shouldn't have had that 9th cup of coffee
90% of people got their jobs through nepotism
>>202060659Yes it is, got my mensa certificate to prove it>>202060660>dry run - noun - a rehearsal of a performance or procedure before the real one.>>202060662Most stuff here is pretty close. If it's more than 2 hours I'd probably just have to figure it out on the day>>202060671Yeah sometimes I'll "drive" the route on google maps first but I also like having actually done it so I know what I'm doing
IQ is meaningless if its not converted to a cushy life or home ownership, and lots of mates and/or sexual partners
>>202060700Fuck off I got work to do
>>202060653need to get that square one and cut off bits to make a swastika
>>202060717for me it's matesthe missusthe pubsimple as
>>202060717what if you can use it to win arguments on the anonymous anime website
>>202060671oi you stole me bloody test
>>202060699based
>dry run - noun - running to the toilet to poo but when you get there only farts come out
accidentally saw a nice picture of the ex
wow impressive I Qand... your hobbies that make use of this I Q?what is that, posting on /brit/? oh.
miss the groyper posting
Choking for a shite
>>202060767I engage in a daily puzzle competition and consistently rank at the top
my dick is having a boner
>>202060767>>202060661
any comes off as aloof and autistic but actually highly sensitive on the inside man in
>>202060802This you lad?
>>202060787easter toad mate
>>202060788bolg on
do you use any lube for your wanks lads? i just lick my palm
internet connection more like internot disconottion
>>202060750spending warm summer days indoors, writing frightening verse to a bucktooth girl in Luxembourg
>>202060802...yh
>>202060825gf wanked me off with a lot of lube on the weekendwas nice
>>202060832how come musicians never change their hairstyle throughout their whole life? unless they go bald i mean
make a new RIGHT NOW or I'll do it, I'M GONNA DO IT
>>202060885>>202060885>>202060885>>202060885
>>202060868Make it a good edition or I'm not posting in it.
>>202060825no ive got a 4skin
>>202060821to a T but I doubt there's actually something wrong with me
>>202058645whenever I mention this people don’t seem to get it but I got thoroughly filtered trying to tune my guitarI just did not get it and would snap the strings. Had an app, had a clip thing to measure the sound, but was too much of a mong to do it correctly