I am a man and I feel that with dating, I can't really have "high" standards I guess. I don't think my standards are low but I don't feel that I can't make half the demands that women make. For example, a woman might say she wants a man that makes 100k or more. I could never say thats what I want a woman to make also. Same with gym stuff. I just feel as a man, women hold me under the gun far more than I ever would them. Is that a natural thing or is that a me problem? Like I'd never demand a woman make me breakfast and lunch or whatever. I just want to date a woman who isn't obese, doesn't have kids(but open to kids) and lives sort of close to me. Those are quite literally my only standards. Is that too low? What are your standards for dating? I don't even know what other people prefer. I want to be reasonable overall. How would I even know if my standards are too low?
>>34457808What do you like in a woman? Start with that and then you can have standards. Even the bare minimum for standards is fine.
>>34457808Those standards are fine and sound achievable, lots of women tick all those boxes
I've decided to avoid and ignore my work crush completely because I've realized it's the only way for me to get over her, as I'm still infatuated with her, and we see each other every day. However, while this strategy creates physical distance, I don't think it creates emotional distance, as I have to organize my whole workday around her. I also have to constantly fight the urge to manufacture situations where I could theatrically ignore her to make my point. Is there a better way to do this?So far, I've:>cut down interactions to the absolute minimum required by work,>started exiting interactions as soon as possible,>stopped talking to her, except for short answers to her questions,>stopped greeting her, even in response,>stopped smiling at her, even in response,>started avoiding not just eye contact, but directly looking at her altogether, even when talking to her,>started leaving the workplace during breaks to avoid seeing her interact with other men.For context, I was into her because I thought she was into me, but it turned out she wasn't, which left me shell-shocked. She said she wanted to be friends, but then she didn't initiate or reciprocate at all, so I stopped trying. Now we are half-hearted acquaintances, but I grew to resent her and this dynamic, so I'm looking to end it. My goal is to no longer know her and to be able to work without paying attention to her existence. She's a much more socially adjusted person, and I think she's okay with our current relationship, so this might hurt her a little, but it's a price I'm willing to pay.Thanks for reading. Any insight is appreciated.
>>34449584>I was into her because I thought she was into me, but it turned out she wasn't>She said she wanted to be friends, but then she didn't initiate or reciprocate at all, so I stopped trying>My goal is to no longer know her and to be able to work without paying attention to her existence>this might hurt her a littleDude. She fucking hates your guts. Is it not obvious?I don't even know what else to say. It's genuinely embarrassing seeing you get so worked up over a rejection from a person who obviously wants nothing to do with your delusions of grandeur and self-centeredness.This reminds me of when I was in highschool and thought every girl who even glanced at me wanted to hop on my cock.
>>34456249>this is work not a social gatheringI paid no attention to her until she started talking to me. I assumed it meant she was into me, and as a 27-year-old KHHV, I wasn't going to let it go.
>>34456630tell her you have work to do and if you don't want to report her for slacking off on the job she best get to work also stupid whore (don't say that last bit about stupid whore)
>>34456285>It's genuinely embarrassing seeing you get so worked up over a rejectionI know. It's never happened to me before, and I'm sick of it. But I can't help but feel hurt watching her be friendly towards other men, when she rejected both my love and my friendship. At least I assume she's just friendly towards them... I also assumed she wasn't spending her breaks alone with them, and yet she is, so what do I know? It's like the existence of these people has become a constant and ever-present reminder that I'm not good enough, a monument to my worthlessness.
>>34449584Hmm im not very experienced myself but perhaps youre looking at it the wrong way. You are doing way too much for this woman. Yes all the things you listed, you are doing it while still obsessed with her. I dont think its the healthy way to approach it.Perhaps another way would be, to simply accept defeat. She doesnt like you. And she has the right to not like you. And theres nothing you can do about it. Accept it and move on.Perhaps this is the way to help you out of this rut. You dont have to do all these extra shit to not even look her in the eyes you know. You didnt do anything wrong. You made your feelings known, which is totally legit, and it just didnt happen and thats fine, thats life. Just treat her normally, with respect, and friendliness, since she didnt do anything wrong either.
Help me make sense of my ex's actions >be together 2 years >she was 18 when we start dating I was 22>she was bullied hard throughout school, never had friends, never received any romantic attraction before me, low self esteem, so she told me that being with me was the best thing that ever happened to her>the relationship is amazing, constantly doing new things together, having new experiences and get on great together >we agree to move in together so start looking for apartments together >also start seriously discussing having children down the line>we're both very excited for the future >a week into looking for apartments she gets a new job at a large company >2 weeks into the new job she gets oddly distant with me, give me short replies, gives excuses not to call eachother after work>a week after this she dumps me despite all our plans and apparently great relationship>when I ask her why she wants to break up she can't give any other reason besides "I just don't want to be in a relationship right now">feel devastated because I'm not even sure what I've done wrong Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
>>34456781realistically, whether there is a guy or not at work she most certainly fell into a group of single girls there and has acess to a new social life that she didnt have before you. If she is with you she wont be able to go out with her new single friends and live the social life that she missed out on, and yes, meet new men. of course there is no reason for her to break up with you over that but I guarantee its mostly likely that reason as opposed to a male coworker.
>>34456781She got a new peer group at work and you don't measure up to them, so she dumped you. Sucks, but that's how women work, especially modern women.It's going to take a lot of willpower but the most important thing you can do is move on quickly and never take her back. Something similar (although not quite as heinous) happened to me after a 5 year relationship and it took me years to get over it because I couldn't understand why she left me. Your gf fell out of love with you because she saw something she wanted more than you, she doesn't value what you have to offer. She's just not the right one after all. Cut contact, go make more friends, and when you're ready, find a better girl. Your ex very likely might come back begging to get back together. Do not under any circumstances accept her back. This is the one chance you have to make her feel the consequences of her actions. Make it count. You've seen her true colors, you'll never be able to trust her again.
>>34456781At least she didn't drag you along before breaking up.But if she does try to crawl back to you, reject her immediately. She's not gonna be the same.
>>34456847>She's fucking one of her coworkers, or trying to get him to fuck her and thinks she has a good chance of success.>>34456797>Got the ick. Monkey branched.>>34456851>She met new prospects at her new job. She realized if she was in a relationship with you, she can't fuck the ten hot, older, successful men that all flirt with the new girl at work.>You didn't do anything. She just wants to fuck Chad and probably enjoys being the center of attention as the new young girl at her workplace.>>34456879>A hot guy flirted with her at work. After getting used, she will inevitably crawl back to you in tears, be strong and reject her.>>34456882>she met Chad at her new job and decided his dick is better than yours. Bitches be like that, don't worry about it. Every GF you will ever have will end the same way.This right here, OP. There's no secret. No need to guess. You probably alread suspected too.
>>34456991Potentially, yes. But it's on a case-by-case basis. So while yes, that is likely, there'll be exceptions if you're lucky.
I had an early sexual experience at the age of 5 and I remember getting fuzzy when I saw older girls and women interacting with boys in cartoons and anime. I have since developed an attraction to seeing them get fucked by futas and traps and I am disgusted with myself. What can I do to get rid of this fetish?
>>34456039Will that reduce the amount of times I think about it or will that rid me of my fetish like I want to?
>>34456229it will increase the chances of bothalso, watch this, it's a brief explanation of how intrusive thoughts workhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=laeYq51SYA0
>>34455345Well you don't beat yourself up over it. That just makes it rubber band. You'd do engage with it without guilt than slowly, over months, replace it with something similar to the extant you can. You probably cannot get rid of it. Which is another reason to not beat yourself up over it. All that accomplishes is weakening yourself.
>>34456341>replace it with something similar to the extant you canI’d rather skip to that
Wish I knew this answer
>33M, given about 8 months to live by doc>spent last 3 months going places and doing things I wanted to do>going through advanced directives, last will shit with my lawyer>talking to the little family I have left>putting on a brave face for them>inside i'm a fucking wreck>tried becoming a christcuck, does little to help>don't want to canadian healthcare myselfI'm not ready to go. I have no idea what's awaiting me on the other side. It hurts, but I'm not ready for the pain to end. How do I man up and take my medicine?
>>34456381Sorry, that's just Mint. Definitely one of my more constant comforts these past couple years.
Go out with a bang and do us all a favor with one of them billionaire lizard people and you might get isekaid into an anime harem
We're all dying, you're just dying faster than the rest of us.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mx4eSkMBx-U
>>34457076Haha. Tempting, but my aim and my energy aren't what they used to be. My friend joked about it the same way.
>>34452242Just try to make your mark on the world known and if you can get treatment that isn't euthanasia, it doesn't hurt to try.
>>34456798lol as if you would turn down free newports and henny because it was from a different color
>>34451384DON'T. Coming from one myself, they're too obsessed with vanity to be worth befriending. They also speak like a 3rd grader having themselves convinced it's a "part of their culture" which isn't really doing any favors, and could definitely dumb you down if you aren't careful. Look for more well-spoken blacks that can articulate themselves well or just befriend other races.
>>34454832Ah. You'll want transgender friends then.
>>34456798I see coalburning everywhere
>>34451384I'm an unironic white nationalist with a very old school folkish cultural background and for whatever reason blacks flock to me. Granted in the settings I've traveled in these tend to be more alternative/autistic blacks but still. In university and in my medical training and stuff every single one of the few black people in those cohorts ended up being in my friend group. I think my pre-modern American culture is more familiar to their FBA culture than 21st century shabbos goy white culture and all the brownoids/asians are
I'm 28 and live in Ireland. I met this woman on TurnUp (Dating app for people who like music) and we had this chat. She unmatched after. What did I do wrong?
>>34457534Didn't do anything wrong
>>34457534>She unmatched after. What did I do wrong?Nothing. She probably found someone she liked more among the hundreds of men who message her every day.
>>34457534nothing wrong maybe be a bit more assertive in setting up a date maybe??? idk this platform also she seems shallow so you dodged a bullet
>dating app for people who like music the fuck lol everyone likes music. This is probably a dating app for weird lefty bitches with tattoos or something in reality
>>34457534This is probably a thinly veiled ad for this app but it's a solid idea for a dating app so if it's not owned by Jews like the rest of them are then best of luck mates
Is it a good idea for a 19 year old woman to become a flight attendant? It's my final year in a culinary program at a technical high school and I have no career plan and I definitely don't want to go to college.
>>34456545I think that's pretty solid. People will always be flying so job security should be pretty good. Sounds a lot like trucking for women where you basically don't have a stable home life. So settling down and having a family will be tough.
>>34456545Sounds alright to me. Good way to get the foot in the door with the company, at least. That picture sure demonstrates that everyone in it has a wristwatch.
>>34456545Yea. Seems like a solid career. As long as you have the people skills to deal with customers.
>>34456545I guess it depends on country, age, etc. But from what little I have heard of from the past becoming a flight attendant is very competitive and you will probably have to compete with other women to even have a chance. its not a "hey want a job? no need to apply!" type of job. expect a lot of commitmet for what is probably a minimum wage job with all of the day to day baggage that goes with it with unique downsides such as:>not being settled in somewhere to have friends or a relationship>exhaustion from strange work hours>constantly being in a cramped crowded cabinunless being a flight attendant is something you can feel proud of I would suggest getting a job at wendy's and I dont mean that in a bad way.
>>34456545Find a good man and get married retard stop indulging in fantasies of being a prostitute
I've been nice to a homeless dude near my job, but he offered to give me a blow job this morning. I enjoy being nice to people, especially people down on their luck, but I'm really not trying to do him favors or interact with him. On one hand, I get homeless people are fucked and may not understand that people do nice things just because, but on the other hand this has soiled our "relationship"
>>34455943yeah happensa girl who was coming out took me with her gay friends to party some years ago and she left earlyI ended up talking with them and we stroke a good conversationeventually they proposed sex, knowing fully well I'm straightI just thanked them and told them I felt flattered but guys don't do anything for methey understood and we parted waysyou're right that soiled our relationship, I deleted their phones after I arrived home, but still, you can always be courteous about it.
>>34456175Just don't hang out with homogays
>>34456185she was straight or thought she was straight when we started hanging outthen she was bi so she dated dudes and girlsthen she started only dating girlsetcthing is we went out to party a couple times with normal straight girls a couple times before that time when she found her first homo sexual circle of friends
>>34456253Yeah. Interesting. I don't know if you're male or female. If you're the gay or the straight. Now i'm just confused.
>>34455943Learn to accept a compliment and carry on.
How to deal with an asshole family member? I’ve asked around and everywhere I go it’s useless moralizing that doesn’t help my situation and so I wonder if there is anything I can do (I legit believe there is none). Like everyone says “forget about him focus on your own life” which is useless. He is this unemployed guy who spends all his time doing drugs, taking my parents money, and going out with a new girl every month (while I get no one), and the most annoying thing to me is I broke my back to work and go to school, often in shit hole places and now I have a boring job. This guy has failed his entire life, never tried and is enjoying everyday, his 20s are so much better than mine.All I want is for him to do what he wanted, which is to go into the trades. At least then I wouldn’t be jealous. He refuses to ask anyone for a job or send his resume now, and so my parents are trying to get him a cool job downtown working at a hospital. It’s so annoying cause I never get help and I love downtown and this guy will get to go there everyday with an easy security or cleaning job, while I waste away in some nameless place.Does anyone know how to make him go get a shitty job I won’t be jealous of him with. I’ve tried everything, I can’t ask him to do it directly cause he’ll think I’m sabotaging him. I can’t do anything man. Do any of you have experience to get this guy to stop beating me in life?
>>34457613>We need a caste system, if you’re ghetto and lazy and don’t try in life, you shouldn’t get to see cute girls in the city who go to university and shit.The women choose him because they know despite all his faults and his brooding bad boy shit, he is at least honest. You are so dishonest you contradict even yourself within two posts. "Better to be the villain that tells the truth.""Than the hero who guards the lie."
>>34457633You hate your brother. That makes you your brother's murderer, even if you never laid a hand on him. Read your own good book.Seriously, the level of pride, conceit, arrogance and psychosis necessary to obsess over a family member "stealing" your hobbies is practically clinical. You may as well be screeching "WHAT? MY BROTHER DRINKS WATER? I DRANK WATER FIRST!! HOW COULD HE DO THIS TO ME? MY LIFE IS RUINED NOW, HE STOLE EVERYTHING FROM ME!". Somebody with your mentality shouldn't be allowed any liberties, you belong in an institution until you learn how to calm down and stop behaving this way.
>>34457629>Yes, everytime I work downtown a year later they move us to a shit office in random nowhere.Now you're confusing me. One minute you're downtown with parents the next not. I can see why you'd make for a good lawyer, lawyers are paid to twist the truth to win cases and help criminals avoid jail. And the lawyer does this because he never actually cared he just wanted money.Anyway, here is the solution: If you want him to get a job in a role you want him in, stop telling him to do that. Instead do it yourself and he will copy you and do it. Because he is black sheep, and the sheep will follow whoever he feels is the role model. Your parents are not his role model, (you) are. But you're in denial about this shit because IDK maybe it would make you feel guilty for all the years you made him feel unwelcome in the home. Who knows maybe talk to a therapist or some shit about that. But if you can accept you are his role model, you can then get him to follow you into whatever job you want him in, but you yourself need to go do it.
>>34457640>Good bookForgive him anon he's a Mormon. This is the same cult that believes Jesus and Satan are brothers. Actual Christians did try to warn people to avoid cults that pretend to resemble the faith but did they listen? Nah. But you're right btw, OP has probably damaged his brother in ways he will never admit. Imagine being adopted and you had no family no home to call your own and you are at the lowest point in your life as a young kid, and a family chooses you and you are given hope and you desperately want to fit in to this family who gave you hope and you try to mimick your brother to become part of the family and feel at home. But the brother (OP) just offers nothing but pure hatred and venom and spite. Wishing for his downfall, spitting on any happiness he finds. Remember though OP is the "good guy" lol
>>34457633>MormonAh, there it is.But really, stop being so obsessive on what your brother is doing and who he is.You have demonstrated that even the thought of him torments you.That's not healthy man.
My whole childhood was spent in foster care and institutionalized bs because my mom never got her act together. How do I stop feeling this way and grow up and make something of my life for once?
>>34457595>How do I stop feeling this wayWhat way? You didn't say how you feel.
>>34457606Like I missed out on my childhood and a crucial part of developing as a human
>>34457595The past had nothing to do with you.Childhood need have nothing to do with adulthood. You are not responsible for that.You are free now.
>>34457595I wasn't in foster care but my childhood was hell. I relate to your OP picture except I wasn't a hello kitty, I'm a dude. And the demonic screaming person I relate to that. What I did is I stopped trying to be male hello kitty. I accepted that the screaming demon man is exactly who I am and I built out of that. I accepted the ugliness of my childhood and stopped running from it. I accepted I was the piece of shit I was desperate not to become and I stopped pretending. And when I did that, it turned out I wasn't really as bad as I thought I was. What I called my inner demon turned out to be an inner child, and instead of hating it, I decided to take care of it. Give things to it I wished I had gotten. Line compassion, forgiveness, mercy. Then I finally matured and finished what my parents couldn't do. I also forgave my parents as well and chose to do the same for them, chose to see the good in them instead of only the bad. Understood they were just humans who had suffered, and in their suffering and self-immolation, they burned others and spread suffering. And that's what I had become too without knowing. I simply repeated the exact same steps as my parents, and that's because the apple never falls far from the tree. But once the apple gains awareness, it can then decide how it will grow. And once you begin to choose how you will grow with awareness, you can break the cycle by accepting the cycle and repeating it, but this time, without the poison.
I really need help bros and I am not sure whats going on with me. I don't really have issues going to sleep but I normally wake up feeling tired still and groggy. I go to work and the first 1-2 hours of my day are absolute ass. It feels like a fucking weight of some sort is on my eyes and I struggle to stay awake in my chair at work. I knod off and basically phase in and out of being "awake". I feel awake enough but I am effectively half asleep it feels like. I also don't abuse caffiene. Coffee basically makes me shit my pants so I don't drink it. HOWEVER, I have found that if I drink an energy drink like White Monster, I do feel a lot better. But I don't want to be dependent on fucking energy drinks. I rarely drink those also. Just not sure what I am doing wrong. Some things I do know:I am likely not getting 8 hours of sleep at night. I basically go to bed 1-2 hours late every night because I doom scroll on instagram. I am not sure if the sleep I do get is restful or not. I wake up at least one time in the night to piss. I also usually wake up and my neck is in pain. Lastly, I find that I basically can't make it through the work day without taking a nap on my break. I basically never wake up feeling energized. Waking up makes me want to kill myself because I feel so awful for those first few hours of the day. What can I do?
>>34457592-Don't be fat. You cant breath correctly while sleeping if you are fat. Your whole body (and critically your brain) will be oxigen deprived. You could not believe what difference it makes.You are perhaps prediabletic if energy drinks awake you, mostly for the glucose.- Get enough discipline to go to bed at X time and do it ALWAYS no matter what. So delete the instagram account. It's enginered to kill you, literally.- Use earplugs. Then it becomes a ritual and your brain become trained to start sleep when you deprive it of sounds.- Wake up at X time and do it ALWAYS.- Take a walk instead of the nap. Youll be adjusted in few days.
>>34457592Apple.
>>34457642I am not fat. I am in pretty good shape. Go to the gym 3 days a week. However, I have heard that even muscular people can have breathing issues so I am not sure. I don't think I am prediabetic either. My guess is that because I am not a caffeine abuser normally, the energy drinks have higher effect on me? I will try the other things you said. Its just so night and day different when I am at work. Like right now at home, I feel fine. At work, for those first couple hours I feel horrible. A part of me thought it was a combo of bad sleep habits and also being bored at work.
How does one cope with the fact that nobody will ever love him (not even his family), that he has been dealt the shittiest cards and that his life is a constant struggle?
when you are delt a shitty hand you bluff
>>34457451I have no idea after 27 years on this bitch of an Earth.
>>34457451You realize that everyone suffers, and that the path out of suffering is the same for everyone. Magnifying your own problems and elevating them above everyone else's just ensures that you stay miserable, resulting from an addiction to self pity.
>>34457453actually, you fold. or you will get exploited for all your money and die miserably in the gutter
>>34457451What have you tried?
How do you guys even Get a Job in Tech ? Today I’ve got 3 rejections in a row.Im soon graduating and im no longer knowing what should I do.Any advices ? Especially for a post graduates like me
>My parents had ruined my life from the very start.>Never got to progress, never got to do what others did.>Stuck in a rather repetitive job with low hours and inability to move out and all the rest. I feel financially trapped.>Couldn't do anything online to become successful and escape from it all. Anything that I tried to do eventually fell apart or failed to take off.>Never got to attend any sort of events that others got to go to, never had any vacations, never got laid, you know all that. It's as if I was deliberately set up to fail from the beginning.>Everywhere I go I see everyone living normal lives, being successful, having nice houses, cars and all that. Some have their own businesses or well off jobs. Meanwhile I'm just stuck...A few decades later, it's all the same, and now I'm just so fatigued with it all. My head hurts, I get too exhausted now. I don't know what I even want to do with myself these days.I thought eventually I would get out of this hell, but it gets worse by the year. And even if I wanted to create an escape, like play old games and such, I never get around to doing it.I am at the stage where I feel that I will never get to talk to people again, I won't ever have a community of my own, I will never get to be like everyone else. Why was I never allowed to succeed? Must I always suffer like this? It's just unfair.
>>34453192Never made enough money between themselves, one of them never wanted to work, other one had lengthy periods of unemployment and even if they had a job they were cleaning toilets and stuff
>>34454144>my parents ruined my life because they were poorYou're honestly a total piece of shit.
>>34454144Gotcha, I grew up poor, but in a totally different situation than you, my father didn't work at all, because he didn't want to, and he didn't collect any government gibs because there was nothing wrong with him, he would just leach off my mom. After my parents divorce I gradually stopped talking to him, he was never a father figure for me, never took care of me or taught me anything at all, I feel like I never had a father. My mom got unemployed 3 years ago, because of her mental health, she didn't look for a job for 6 months till her gibs run out, during that time I tried telling her to get a job, but she refused every time. She found a new job now, but she said she can't afford paying the bills, so I pay her mortgage, condo fees, gas, water, food... Crazy that I am paying for a house that will never me mine because I have siblings. I make a decent amount of money for the country I live in, but I can't live alone because most of my salary is compromised. I lost so many opportunities because of that... I was never able to have a girlfriend, can't brin girls at home, saw all my friends buying their houses, cars, travelling, marrying, conquering their dreams, and I am stuck at the same place. Life is tough, I could have been a way better person than I am if I had a better family, even with the kind of family I got I was able to achieve a lot of things, but I kinda of feel you, seeing your own potential and knowing you will never be able to achieve it messes with your head, just don't give up.>>34454161>You're honestly a total piece of shit.You never went hungry in your entire life. Did you? You don't know what's growing up dirty poor to the point you have to walk around with a hole in your shoes, hungry all the time to the point you can't think. It messes with you, you don't reach your genetic potential, you don't grow taller, you don't develop your brain, knowing that everything could have been different if you were born in another family hits harder.
>>34454161>>my parents ruined my life because they were poor>You're honestly a total piece of shit.By the way, OP is not wrong, it's his parents fault, they should have planned for his birth, they have a moral obligation towards feeding and taking care of OP till he is developed. Thinking otherwise is mind boggling.
>>34455138Correct. Also when people stop working permanently after they give birth. And therefore deprive money from coming in.
