As of late, I have been feeling an overwhelming sense of loneliness and no matter what I try I cannot combat it for the life of me.I am at a complete loss and it's eating at me more and more as the days pass. Its brutal.Please if anyone knows a way to help please share.No, it's not as simple as getting a social life or going out either. I have been trying.
>>34454586Same fag op making some post about loneliness. Narcs out. Watch for new threads that are carrying a common theme
>>34454595Meds, dude. Get a family member to remind you, set a timer, whatever works. Just remember to take 'em.
>>34454600Those who say "meds" are typically narcs gas lighting
>>34454586The person in my photo is a composer I am quite fond of, Dmitri Shostakovich.And I am glad other like minded people exist. Very unfortunate that it had to be found out this way but oh well.
>>34455501>Dmitri ShostakovichI swear I've heard picrel at the start of a movie. Sounds like a perfect song to start off a historical drama made in the '70s.>And I am glad other like minded people exist.I'm never going anywhere, and even if I stop being lonely, I'll never forget the feeling. In a way it defined my formative years and I'm never getting those back.What are your struggles?>Very unfortunate that it had to be found out this way but oh well.How do you mean?
so today im planning on telling my parents that im dating a 33 year old man. im 18F. we’ve been dating since January in secret. its been online so far but i really love him and he loves me too. its not some weird groomer situation. we actually have things to talk about and we get along sooo well. this will be my first ever relationship i will tell my parents about. my parents arent against me dating, but they prefer if i just focus on college. (im in college rn). i think they would accept him if it wasnt for the fact he is 15 years older than me.which honestly, i dont completely blame them. if i was a parent i would also be a bit concerned if my daughter is dating a 33 year old man. but i know he loves me. he has his life together. he has a career and his own house. im gonna continue college and my other stuff but my goal in the later future is to move in with him and become his wife and have kids. i plan on letting my parents know they can meet him IRL. im so nervous. i feel like my parents will have a heart attack when they find out how much older he is. i dont think they will approve of this but i have to tell them because im serious about him.
>>34456850My 25y.o ex left me for a 40y.o guy behind my back. Then moved to his country. You're fine. It all depends on how your relationship with your parents is. If they can let you make these decisions yourself, great, if not, that's a problem you'll have to face later too, until you solve it.
>>34456863i havent met him, but its very serious and i want to be upfront about him to my parents because i want to meet him irl but i dont want to do it behind my parents back.>>34456899i dont like him only because he is older. i would love him if he was my age. its just that i think because of his age we share the same values, like i feel like a lot of boys my age (18-25) arent really serious about marriage. they just want to fuck and mess around and hang out. jm loooking for something serious. he doesnt have a lot of money honestly but i know he will do what he has to do to provide for me and future children. im not with him only for money. my relationship with my father isnt the great but he is present in my life. i know he is serious about me, im just worried of what my parents will think of the age gap
>>34456850You know women, on average, live 8 years longer than men? That means he'll probably die 23 years before you do. Are you looking forward to growing old alone?More importantly: you are not in love with him. You think you are, but you're not. You're in love with the idealised image of him that you have in your mind. Because you've never actually met him, the real version of him has never intruded on the fantasy; and your mind fills in all the unknown details, making them as good as the few things you do know about, and giving you an impossibly perfect image to become infatuated with. If I were your parents, I would certainly be concerned about you dating someone that age; but I would be much, much more concerned to hear you talking about moving in and having children with a person you have NEVER ACTUALLY MET. You are moving way, way too fast here. When you've been dating him close up for at least six months, then and only then should you be thinking about getting serious with him.One final question: how much of what you know about him is based entirely on what he himself has told you? Or, to put it another way, how much might be lying about, and you would have absolutely no way of knowing? When you meet someone in real life, you also meet their friends and their family, and that makes it a lot harder for them to lie about anything really big. When you know someone entirely online, they can lie about *anything* and you have no way of finding out.
>>34456850make sure to tell them the part about how it's online and you never met
>>34457166This OP.You are in thr age of dual sexes working. It needs 2 to run the life the previous generation enjoyed with just the man working.You are in limerence. Promises, and ideals all fall flat when a man faces tough situation either spontaneously or in the long run. That is the true test of character. From your conversation it doesn't sound like he's financially up there for his age. You have to understand, I'm a male I should hyping up a 33 year old but since it's all online, you don't even know how he lives, what his financial condition is but from all you've told that he would try to make it work.If you were my little sister and this man happened to be: decent looking, well kept, no known history of philandering, previous altercations with law, his grades and opinions of teachers, professors, colleagues, friends, and finally where he is financially. Then I would give you my blessing.Trust me it all looks rosy in your youth.You need to focus on your career at the moment and let it play out long term.You first then everyone else
How embarrassing could it be?I rage-quit my job today (just for today), and when my boss asked me what happened, I told him as vaguely as possible that I'm going through a lot right now. Yet it still brought me to the verge of crying.I have appointments with a clinical psychologist and a psychiatrist in the next two weeks, and I know I won't be able to hold back at all when they start digging deeper. It's not like something dramatic happened either. I'm just so defeated I can't talk about my life without tearing up.I'm male, the psychologist is female, and the psychiatrist is male. How embarrassing will it be for everyone involved when I inevitably start bawling my eyes out?
>>34456707Embarrassment with a shrink is just abiout as self-sabotaging as you can get. The whole point of therapy is honesty
>>34457036Personally I think going to a shrink is self sabotage to begin with. Imagine paying $100 an hour for someone to talk you out of your own instincts. And then when you react in some sort of way, they pathologize it like dissecting an insect lol.>Oh anon. I know you pay me $100 an hour to pretend to give a shit. And I knew you had zero positive affirmations from other humans. I gave it to you and now you say you are having feelings for me? That's called transference anon, it's okay anon it's a pathological thing anon."??? Bitch you knew I had zero positive affirmations and you gave them and you telling me it's some voodoo that I caught feels? Therapists are just emotional prostitutes.
>>34456707I think it would be unusual for a psychiatrist or therapist to get through a whole day without any of their patients crying.
>>34456707They deal with violent and paranoid schizophrenics, conspiracy theorists, and other genuinely crazy people. Some guy with depression crying during a routine appointment is THE most normal thing they see. They have loads of tissues in their rooms for a reason.
You'll only feel worse by holding in all your emotions. A good cry can really help sometimes. I'm sure your psychiatrist will understand. If he doesn't, then fuck him.
So I have a friend whos an alcoholic, meth addict and just all drugs that he gets access to, he even did heroin few times just because he got it for free, hes balding, he has debt on social security, lives with his mom and his only hobby is doing drugs or drinking in front of his PC playing league of legends or roblox, he is 19. And what fascinates me is that, he has a tinder account and he manages to bag very nice women, at least 1 per month, some are drug addicts like him, and some are actually pretty decent women, who just occasionally drink, have a decent job and pay, are independent, live alone (The women are also 20-25 years old). No matter who they are he still at least gets a one nighter or a short lived 3 month relationship. I dont know are girls on tinder really this easy? He also manages to play with women, that they are the ones messaging him and chasing him instead of him having to message them first, it really fascinates me that such a guy can get so many women. He also does not hide anything about himself, he will with no problem nor shame tell them about his habits, the fact that he has debt, hes a junkie, alcoholic etc. Is Tinder just an easy way to women or is there something that Im missing here?
>>34456967I thought he'd be like 30. But 19? He's an overgrown child just like the rest of the women he dicks. Let them play around with their genitals in some desperate attempt for meaninglessly fleeting validation they seem to be in severe deficit of.
>>34456978The thing is he looks bad,+many of his unhealthy habits yet he gets so much matches
>>34456967>is there something that Im missing here?He's probably very confident. That's the single most important thing when it comes to attracting women.
>>34456967Are you the same age? Probably so many of your generation are faggots that it's easy pickings for women. Plus he probably gives them cocaine.
>>34457160I am 20, hes 19, we knew each other since we were 7
i caught my gf of 4 years whom I lived with cheating about 3 months ago. she has since moved out as of last month but she still stops by to see our cat and pick up some of her things that are still in my apartment. Anyways, I keep having visions of the life I had planned out for us (kids, marriage, etc.) and I have this feeling of forgiving her and starting over. I think a lot of this stems from me wanting to save her, our whole relationship has been me trying to fix her, so to speak. supporting her when she didnt have a job, helping in so many ways i could write all day about. I hate seeing her so sad. Getting back together with her would certainly make her happy, and I think it would make me happy too. I liked making her happy, and while she broke my heart i dont hate her for it. its hard to hold onto hate in this situation.So, have you ever forgiven someone who cheated on you? were you able to work things out? her dad cheated on her mom when she was young, and while her mom almost left she decided to stay. I remember her telling me she believed, that no matter how many partners you try to have a meaningful relationship with, you'll always have the same problems to deal with, or something to that nature. So is it worth it to work with the one you currently love, or roll the dice and find someone new? also she's lost a ton of weight and looks super good, its not fair lol
>>34456116a part of me will always love her. she's not in a permanent living situation, so i cant just give her cat back and all her other belongings quite yet but eventually, i hope. this thread has done a good job convincing me not to try things over again at the very least, but part of me will still care about her>>34456169i think if we were breaking up on mutual terms but she clearly still wants me so sex will just send a message that i still want to be with her. it would be cool if sex was just the physical pee pee hole bang bang walla walla ding dang
>>34455471Lmao why even make this thread?You just want someone to tell you "go for it bro she loves you this is a good idea"Okay. Go for it bro. She loves you. This is a good idea.Feel better?
My bf caught me cheating before and basically laid down that if he ever caught me doing it again we'd be fucking over, and graciously "believed" my excuses. He didn't call me names just stoically looked at me like he didn't recognize his woman anymore. It made me realize what I needed to prioritize. My guilt was too high anyways I was hardly enjoying it. I realized I needed a life with him more than variety. If you want to make it work with her than have a convo like that. I don't mean that you have to be paternalistic but have self respect. You are choosing to give her another chance because you as a man decided you want her in your life enough to give her grace, don't let her twist it
>>34457209so are you still together? is everything going well or is there still lingering resentment or tensions?
>>34455428Make a contract with her. Also make sure she pays for everything.
How can I find a woman like Elvira?
Women like this do exist and they paint themselves as the odd duck, but they're very cheery and high spirited while working the strangest jobs. Good lucking finding them though because I see them only once every other year.Most you can do is target gothrock bands and their ilk and go to their concerts, but they won't be like the woman I just described and will probably want something.
>>34456502Like Elvira in what way? Goth? Big boobies?
>>34456749Really bad actress?
>>34456502>How do I find someone who was in costume for television in real life?Lol
>>34456749Ideally both, honestly
I'm 26 years all and all I want out of life is to have sex with a woman with huge boobs. Hiring a prostitute would defeat the whole purpose because I want to be worthy enough for a big breasted womanThe thing of course; I'm really bald, skinny and ugly so my chances are not highAn I too old? Should I give up on hope?
>>34456705You'll never be worthy so long as you cling onto a notion that you have to pass a certain worthiness threshold to fuck a saggy tit hoe
>>34456705Women are born with big tits they don't earn it.
>>34456705this thread is dumb and you're probably the same retard that keeps posting her here but I'm gonna indulge you for a bitHave you had sex before?
>>34456705fuck a fat 50 year old with big tits. You're a loser but will still be the pretty one. Problem solved.
>>34457064I did have sex before, yes. With 3 different girls. All unattractive as well, except one of them. All flat
I am desperate an sometimes I meet a woman (federal agent) who looks like she has down syndrome or is overweight or retardedThese are my 3 deal breakersFatRetardedFat and retardedCan I remain friend with fat retards, or would it be best to cut them off completely?HOW ARE SO MANY PEOPLE FAT
>>34457201>Fat
Hello, this is rather embarrassing to admit. But lately I've been trying to confront my flaws and move forward in life, as I'm in my early 20s and don't want to be plagued with guilt and shame for the rest of my life.Back in 2020, during the peak of the BLM movement, I became rather politically active in terms of turning into a racist little shit, and with that racist little shitness came a guilty pleasure in watching interracial porn. This has become a curse, as now my OCD has become truly terrible these days, and I am haunted by these memories. I have a hard time listening to rap music I used to enjoy without thinking of the porn, and being around black people in public, as all it does is make me anxious and sends groinial responses. It's really embarrassing to admit, and sometimes I contemplate maybe just ending my life because it's become such an issue these days.
>>34441655NTA, but how do you let those thoughts pass over.I am trying to cut down on fapping, but when I get bored or stressed I start thinking about porn and I feel like I cannot focus until I gain some post nut clarity. afterwards, however, I traded clarity for low energy. I am not getting anything done. How do I focus on something else to let the porn thoughts pass. Any helpful techniques?
>>34444134love me some bpb
>>34452013Try not to react to them. Let them pass, you’ll feel it, but don’t try to unravel it.
>>34452803aka erp for ocd
>>34452023Whats your fave video by them?It's my go-to
>Matched with this girl from tinder, talked and joked a bit. >Got a good back and forth going.>asked for her number. Got it>make plans to hang out together on Wednesday night for drinks>it is now Wednesday>I no longer feel like going out>I have to get dressed and drive 20 miles away to pick her up>find a bar, pay for her overpriced drinks and mine too>I dont even like drinking because of hangovers and its a giant waste of money>have to tip 20 percent to bartender for both our over priced drinks> I have to pick her up, drop her off, entertain her, listen to her stories, pay for her tan>all for the chance, just simply the chance to maybe get a kiss or a thank you and a second date to do it all over again>I dont even feel like going out tonight>but if I cancel or reschedule 99 percent chance I will offend her and she will lose interest or move on to the next beta in line. And trust me there are hundreds waiting for my place in it.>I feel like I am my own worst enemy.> I already did the hard part of finding a match, getting a number, and securing a dateComment too long. Click here to view the full text.
>>34455889>I already did the hard part of finding a match, getting a number, and securing a dateWhat are you talking about? That is the easy part.
>>34455889Do a date that doesn't involve spending money. Go to a park, walk the beach, actually get to know her.Will she dislike that? Will she be upset that you aren't spending money on her? Yes? Good. Drop her. You don't need low quality gold diggers in your life. Like, really ask yourself this: do you want to be with a woman who will get mad at you and lose interest in you if you aren't showering her with gifts?
>>34455940>OP's gut instinct is telling him this.he doesn't know it yet, might me autosabotage due to childhood wounds
>>34455889Bars also serve coca cola for non drinkers and you driving is a responsible excuse to not drink
>>34455919fpbp
>$300 in checking account>$30 in savings>$20,000.00 in 401kShould I withdraw? I don't really have an emergency but I'd like to move out of my parent's home. I know I'll be taxed to hell and back but it's been pay check to paycheck for years
>>34454327club goers are 18-22there's a huge difference in those 3-4 years
>>34452236I'm glad i'm out of this late twenties phase where you're not even 30 but you think you're old. That's such a retarded thing society makes us believe.
Bump
>>34454525>club goers are 18-22>there's a huge difference in those 3-4 yearsGood news. Not only are you wrong, you are also retarded
>>34452236>Should I withdraw?No. Early withdrawal for a 401k gets reported on your taxes for that year as 100% income.It's generally a really big mistake to draw from a 401k early for this reason.>$20k in 401kThat's chump change. Just leave it in there.>it's been pay check to paycheck for yearsHow would the added expenses of living on your own improve that? Is moving out of your parents' home somehow paired to also making MORE money to afford it?
My cousin is 20 and claims he is sexually attracted to pre-pubescent children and he argues that its because of his hentai addiction, because before 16 he never felt attracted to children or even girls his age, he only felt attracted to adult women.He says he wants to stop feeling attracted to children. He says he wants to stop masturbating or looking at any type of hentai or porn and see if it changes anything, but he's scared that it won't. I told him to get therapy but he's afraid that his parents will find out.So is it a good idea for him to get therapy? Would abstaining from masturbation and porn be a better solution?
There should be some attempt to correct the problem, but going to far means that you aren't coming back, and bashing the candle to CP may be the final stop before rape occurs.
>>34456122https://www.stopitnow.org/
>>34456122Tell him to take finasteride, it will kill his sexuality.
>>34456122Either you sex a female and produce children, or you don't. This whole free time to play with your genitals for extended periods of time is a very modern invention that can be remedied by simply having not a whole lot of time to play with your genitals. By you know, doing something constructive with your time and building something that endures and doesn't dissipate in 25 minutes of building up with your very muscular right hand and arm.
>>34456122>So is it a good idea for him to get therapy? Would abstaining from masturbation and porn be a better solution?Both of those things are essential. (Actually giving up porn may not be necessary, but he needs to be very strict about it only containing adult women); he needs to quit the stuff he's looking at now).
heya /adv/ I know there's a lot of men on 4chan so I'm coming here for some help. I was wondering... what would a girl have to do to successfully hookup with u? and no I don't want to wear makeup it's waay too expensiveidk what to do when I approach a guy and I wanna make sure they don't try to go further for a relationship or anything. just want a one night stand thing. but I also wanna make sure they don't like, have an std. I'm an introvert sooo I really need help with this. what should my lines be? should I make a script or anything? rly sry if that's a dumb question but as u can prob tell Im cluelessss T~T
>>34455691feel gross afterwards?? why??>>34454111okey but um.. if not 4chan where tho>>34455108rly??? but like i have NO. experience. at all. omg the most I could do is literally just lay there like it's THAT bad
>>34454360How do you know that anon is a woman
>>34456086If you're just looking for tips on how to make a man cum I'd say try to start with foreplay like a blowjob, then go to vaginal sex.
>>34454360I'm a guy, but whatever helps you sleep at night.
>>34456086>omg the most I could do is literally just lay there like it's THAT badIn which case, one-off casual sex is not what you should be aiming for. At least find a guy who's patient and sympathetic and willing to teach you what to do. I did that for a virgin FWB some years ago - she was very grateful! (And rather sweet).
Please /adv/. Please. Please. >at work>have a qt coworker 21f>no pretense. Tell her straight up I have a crush on her>she married young (he's 26m like me) but still wants to be friends>typical simpery ensues>husband yells at her I'm there to wipe to tears>she needs money for gas I'm the ATM>not allowed to talk to her outside of work because of husband. >constantly flirting at workI'm sorry I know I'm rambling. Point is she knows I have feelings for her but I'm the only one who talks to her. She let me hug her and we go on walks away from the group and she even let me use a photo of her as my wallpaper>fast forward she tells me her husband went off the deep end and she's done>dare I hope?>she says he's filing for divorce>dare I dream?Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
>>34455530>>34455538Stop torturing yourself man, just leave her be and move on. Don't ever pay her mind that way again. Put this whole thing behind you, and don't look back.
>>34447905>Please. I can't fuck this up. How do I proceed?If you think she'd cheat on him for you, why wouldn't she cheat on you for another man?Is it because she's hot or something? Get over it. Find someone who appreciates you as a person, not you as a wallet.
>>34453222
>>34452347>>34452675>She said its going to be months and months before she's ready to date>OP here. She chose her husband over me. I want to die.You told her you liked her, got rejected, simped for her, asked her while she's getting abused when she'll be ready to date, then sent her a fucking goodmorning text after she asked for space?Put your dick in your pants and man the fuck up.You are an embarrassment. Get another job or ignore her entirely from now on.
>>34447905Do not confess. Don't give her time or care like that unless you wanna be just friends. When you give and give you get taken for granted.
How can I stop being attracted to my mom?
>>34451086You're not attracted to your mother. The human body has a mechanism specifically to prevent that. You're just a gooner that gets off on breaking sexual taboos. The solution is just to stop gooning. To stop gooning simply stop using any social media and tell your parents whenever you goon. I have started confessing to my parents whenever I goon and it has helped me cut down on it a lot.
>>34456351that would fuel the fetish more you retard
>>34456351>The human body has a mechanism specifically to prevent that. Like a magical forcefield that prevents a benis in the bagina?Can it be turned off like with Chris-chan?
>>34456351That mechanism can be broken down. There's a mechanism that prevents you from spontaneously murdering someone but if that gets worn down you become capable. All that needs to happen is the mind just needs a bit of a push or one thousand stressors to send it into survival mode. There doesn't even need to be an apocalyptic environment or anything severe, just enough psychological abuse over years or decades does the same trick
You can't
