[a / b / c / d / e / f / g / gif / h / hr / k / m / o / p / r / s / t / u / v / vg / vm / vmg / vr / vrpg / vst / w / wg] [i / ic] [r9k / s4s / vip / qa] [cm / hm / lgbt / y] [3 / aco / adv / an / bant / biz / cgl / ck / co / diy / fa / fit / gd / hc / his / int / jp / lit / mlp / mu / n / news / out / po / pol / pw / qst / sci / soc / sp / tg / toy / trv / tv / vp / vt / wsg / wsr / x / xs] [Settings] [Search] [Mobile] [Home]
Settings Mobile Home
/adv/ - Advice

4chan Pass users can bypass this verification. [Learn More] [Login]
  • Please read the Rules and FAQ before posting.
  • AdBlock users: The default ruleset blocks images on /adv/. You must disable AdBlock to browse /adv/ properly.
  • Are you in crisis? Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at +1 (800) 273-8255.

08/21/20New boards added: /vrpg/, /vmg/, /vst/ and /vm/
05/04/17New trial board added: /bant/ - International/Random
10/04/16New board for 4chan Pass users: /vip/ - Very Important Posts
[Hide] [Show All]

[Advertise on 4chan]

[Catalog] [Archive]

File: 1710161921537845.jpg (414 KB, 992x1344)
414 KB
414 KB JPG
>What is /htgwg/?
How to Get Women General is by men, for men, about women, so bring all of your questions about getting and dealing with women here. Some anons on this site actually get laid, and some of those even want to help. If you're trying to meet and date women, then this is the place to ask questions, seek advice, and share experiences. We know how hard it can be. We got you bro.

>What is /htgwg/ not?
These threads are NOT for whining, moping, incels, volcels, MGTOW, hopelessness, or demoralization. We're all aware that meeting and dating women is hard these days, and even harder for some, but /htgwg/ is for men trying to overcome the challenges. IGNORE the posters who complain, who have given up, or who insist that there's nothing they can do. This site has other boards and threads that they can fuck off to.
BE SMART: Spot the bait, don't reply, and DON'T WASTE TIME ARGUING WITH THEM!

>How to ask for advice
Context is important: be more specific than "This girl ghosted me, why?" We can't help if we don't know the situation, so try to provide as much (useful) info as possible ("I was at the bar, this chick was checking me out..."). What's your relationship with the girl? How long have you known her? Any conversation screenshots? Etc...
Don't forget to ask an actual question.

>Books and Resources
"Models": https://ufile.io/f/jrw9j (expired?)
"No More Mr Niceguy": https://libgen.li/edition.php?id=143167290
"Mystery Method": https://pastebin.com/cMHcY4dc (old pastebin)

Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
180 replies and 10 images omitted. Click here to view.
>if there was one hobby that you could just frequent and it would be full of available women, all the dudes would immediately flood that place.
pretty sure dance classes are like that and aren't flooded with dudes, but to make it work best you should go with a female friend

stop autisticly limiting yourself to designated places to meet women and start making an effort to get better at reading the situation with all women you meet everywhere for if they're showing interest or just being polite
I don't meet any women unless you're talking about stuff like women in the store doing their groceries
>I don't meet any women unless you're talking about stuff like women in the store doing their groceries
Lets start with any women you exchange words with and leave the cold approaching to later. Try to get better at interpreting their tone of voice, body language, facial expressions, whether they're willing to keep talking or are in a hurry to move on. If they seem open to chatting then just practice casually talking to some of them for a little while, without having the goal of dating them adding pressure in your mind, there's plenty more women out there, you can let the first few go
>pretty sure dance classes are like that
Only in areas with an abundance of women.
On my previous tech campus Spermacity, there were more guys trying to learn to dance than girls.
I don't exchange words with any women. I literally have no idea where you live that you just have an endless supply of women you talk to

File: IMG_6292.png (380 KB, 480x320)
380 KB
380 KB PNG
I graduated college right as the Covid lockdowns hit in 2020. I wasted my undergrad on a degree that I was good at, but I hate the work itself and it doesn’t pay well.

I enlisted in the military in 2021, initially just because 1. I wanted to get some, and 2. it ironically paid better than what I went to school for, but after around six months I realized I wanted to commission and make it a career.

I’ve been trying to become a Naval aviator for a couple years now and have gotten rejected once already, I’ll be applying again this summer. Here’s my question: what the hell do I do if I get rejected again? My contract will almost be up by then, I don't want to do anything in the civilian world, and I don’t want to reenlist in my current job. I’m also 26 now, and I don’t want to be a grandfather by the time I’m done with flight school.

File: 1711644902600913.jpg (35 KB, 564x564)
35 KB
It keeps flaring up. I can't sleep because I can't pee. My balls hurt so bad I can only last through 4 hours of work till I'm unable to move. But I can't sit down either. After 10 months I finally got it to a good point so I could get a job and now that I'm about to apply is all gone downhill. Why does God want me to be a NEET? I'm gonna lose my trade career that I already went to school for over this at this rate.
9 replies omitted. Click here to view.
This is true. This is a genuine case for disability. The urine retention thing alone is a big issue. That's going to be bad for the kidneys, and if it flares up and he can't pee at all, that's a medical emergency and means a catheter.
Obviously, you should cut out alcohol, caffeine, and spicy foods. Get yourself checked for food allergies. Drink lots of water. Get exercise, including kegels. Orgasms should be good for you, but don't overdo it.
prostatectomy... I wish I had it as easy as you
Doctors won't do that because I'm only 20. I don't wanna give up and be infertile yet. What issue do you have?
chlorine dioxide, page 310:

File: 1713667233214989.png (889 KB, 1920x1080)
889 KB
889 KB PNG
>1990: 33% of Americans had 10 or more close friends, only 3% had zero
>2021: Only 13% had 10 or more, while the amount who have zero has increased to be almost the same at 12%, quadruple what it was in 1990

Would hate to see what these numbers are like in 2023. It's sad to see friendship rapidly become a thing of the past. At least non-shallow ones.
1 reply omitted. Click here to view.
33% had 10+ CLOSE friends? lol whatever dude, that just means there were a bunch of liars. Take that 20% difference and spread it out over the lower numbers and voila, you got the same damn thing on both sides
I mean it doesn't help that media is constantly brainwashing people with trust no one, white vs black, red vs blue, old vs young, man vs woman, serial killer vs masses, and shit even the Obamas are producers of a movie where two families basically hate each other and don't cooperate after the world ends.

It's thankfully not actually like this in reality, but the effects are still felt. On top of this every is worked to death as our politicians and other crooks get richer and richer, so people hardly have time for friends since they're trying to recover on the weekends usually
>if you ignore the facts and alter the numbers to fit your narrative, it's the same
This has even happened to boomers and gen Xers who used to have friends. Nobody has the energy to maintain them in this economy lol.
Yep, hard to make or maintain friendships when you're broke and exhausted from being overworked.

After work, I'm too exhausted and stressed out to go anywhere or do anything. And even if I did go somewhere, I'd be alone, so it's no different than just going home.

File: file.png (1.56 MB, 1305x2048)
1.56 MB
1.56 MB PNG
Is it worth seeing a prostitute after a breakup? Or will it just make me feel worse? I'm american so its already a bit nerve racking. I'm just turning 30 soon, kind of depressed at my dating prospects despite being a pretty average white guy. I hooked up with a fat chick from tinder that was like 37 and it was pretty great head but beyond that I kind of wouldn't mind hooking up with someone a bit more attractive just to push my self confidence back up a bit
1 reply omitted. Click here to view.
honestly some of the hang up is I just need to know I CAN somehow get girls as attractive as my ex, even if its just fooling the monkey parts of my brain with cash.

You are 1000% correct -- there's a lot more going on in my brain that needs corrected. I'm lifting hard, eating well, etc, but its gonna be a while for me to properly put these pieces on the chessboard I think, so I think I wanna satisfy the monkey part of my brain a bit while I work through my issues
You may be able to satisfy the physical part of your brain but it won't be a full solution. I advised caution because it can make the other part harder.
at your age you should be past your casual sex phase.
No, it won't help.
Get out of this juvenile fornication mindset. You should only have sex with women you are sure you want to spend your life with.
So you are 30 years old and you still think women don't have any value outside of how they look, and all you care about is how outwardly attractive they are? Yeesh you sound 20, not 30. You're at an age to be finding a life partner to settle down with. Even the hottest woman ever is still going to end up wrinkly, saggy and pudgy eventually so choosing someone based just on that is not a good idea. You really need to sort out your priorities, maybe go to therapy.
nah, you need to plow enough sluts until you get bored of it, it's not an age thing

File: IMG_4386.jpg (87 KB, 800x450)
87 KB
28male, wondering if I should even try to keep dating despite my situation

I am 28 and have had one long term relationship and that lasted about two years. This was from age 24-26.
Aside from that I have dated lots of other women but nothing has really gone far and I sometimes wonder if I will ever fall in love again. Like the feeling seems so beyond possible at this point.
I have lots of social anxiety around women I’m attracted to, and will typically not go out of my way to introduce myself even if I get signals. Despite having lots of other good things going for me.
Aside from that, another reason I am so insecure is because of issues with my car. I have a huge dent in the passenger side door that cracks super loud when you open it and you have to slam it really hard. I also need new brakes and rotors and some work on my engine. But I don’t have the money to fix it all at once.
I rent a house for myself and I can pay all of my bills and such but my car is so bad right now and despite people saying “the right woman won’t care,” I refuse to believe that. Most women will care. They won’t want to date a guy whose car grinds and has a massive dent on one of the doors. They have other better options and won’t settle.
I just feel bad. I’m working extremely hard to build a good life for myself and dating is so difficult and I don’t think I’ll be in a better place financially for atleast another year or two.
And the idea of not being able to date because of this just sucks.
I think I have a lot of other stuff to offer. I have a good personality / humor, I am in really great shape and decent looking and I have hobbies and my own lifestyle that I’m passionate about. And I hate the idea that I’ll be over looked because of my car and I wonder if it’s even worth it to date
File: téléchargement.jpg (55 KB, 500x628)
55 KB

File: 0_wATbQ49jziZTyhZH.jpg (192 KB, 1024x656)
192 KB
192 KB JPG
How do I stop seeing the child in everyone?
8 replies omitted. Click here to view.
Utilize your perception by honing the skill of reading more tells about people and act accordingly. You are being naive by operating under the assumption everyone acts with grace and good faith. Incorporate healthy skepticism.

Few have our eyes, keep it hidden and pull strings behind the curtain of awareness, mental fortitude, honor, and good will.
ITS ok to hate me
didnt you read the lost children arc?
even kids are capable of evil.
Evil must be smited down, I must kill the children
nah i wouldnt got that far, i think it just means that the roots of evil go deep enough to effect children, but theyre often harmless enough to other ways to resolve it.

File: IMG_9377.jpg (11 KB, 360x270)
11 KB
I have a somewhat blacked turn on and I relapsed on it last night and I’ve felt like vomiting since. Been considering just doing a voluntary psych ward visit. Years of being a former /pol/fag and coomer have ruined me.
9 replies omitted. Click here to view.
This is what you get for spamming blacked porn
Never did, anon.
White people are so weird. You don't understand how weird being black is and seeing ya'll spam bbc bbc bbc everywhere
Thank me by actually putting hard work into resolving your issue.
I will. I’d like to clarify that I have been in the bedroom, but I have bad ED because I get major performance anxiety, so your point still stands.

File: IMG_7559.jpg (468 KB, 1125x569)
468 KB
468 KB JPG
I went to the beach today and I saw a gorgeous girl. She noticed I was looking at her occasionally and she took off her shorts and went over to her back to tan, she even occasionally pushed her ass towards my way, and being playful with her feet.
But I was too fucking AFRAID of being seen as weird or failing and I didn't go for it.
8 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>exclaim in a way that makes it obvious how pretty she is

can you give an example of what you would say? im a social retard
She was NOT flirting. It is all in your lonely mind.
So she is eyeing you; just go for a bath in the sea, if she keeps looking at you go out of the water and walk towards her and do small talk like "Hi, a great day to be on the beach "etc etc etc
If she is friendly you are onto something.
she's just trying to enjoy herself at the beach you fucking self obsessed incel
I get that you're trying to be funny at best and a piece of shit trying to bring someone down at worst, but it's not cool.

How do I deal with dating in my 30s? All the leftovers are fat as fuck or insane.
93 replies and 3 images omitted. Click here to view.
Plus my shift is often barren. Most of the time it's just me and a bunch of older married women. I don't really work with anyone my own age.
The internet has made it a lot harder to meet people. A lot of people that you'd meet in the past simply by going out and doing things are now at home on the internet due to how expensive going out has gotten. Most people can only afford a social activity once a month.

I can't waste money going out because if I do, I starve and my bills don't get paid. Plus I have to put $100 in savings each month
Sounds like you'll have to go into new territory to find the kind of people you want to know, anon.
Unfortunately romantic relationships don't necessarily come with sex as a given. Even when you are in one you have to work for it. And even then there is no guarantee.
That's what happens to most men from what I've heard. I had a tough time finishing my master's degree and it really undermined my confidence and self-image. That might have been why I took an aberrant path instead of becoming a secure, collected 30s daddy for zoomettes. Ah well.

File: nightmare.jpg (6 KB, 128x128)
6 KB
>be me
>just had my first drink last night
>alone in my room just to test
>1 oz of vodka mixed in with soda.
>wait 30 minutes
>doesn't feel different, go to sleep
>wake up from vivid nightmare

I just googled it
>despite being used as a sleep aid, alcohol causes nightmares
Why the fuck doesn't anybody talk about this? Is it rare? All I ever heard about was hangovers, not cosmic nightmares to rival my worst waking moments. Can any anons give me insight on this?
Alcohol disrupts sleep especially as it wears off, so it can cause these phenomena. Tread carefully.
why drink alcohol when you dont have to?
shit is bad for you.
stop drinking alcohol.
I don't want to drink. The idea of losing control over my actions is a fear of mine. I'm extremely risk averse in general, it's stopped me from doing a lot of things most people do when they're teenagers.

I have social anxiety and I'm hoping that drinking will help me break the negative feedback loops associated with talking to strangers.
Loss of control is bullshit. I've never lost control of myself no matter how much I drank, frankly I think people just use it an excuse.
I meant it more as, I normally wouldn't say X to stranger because I'd worry about making a fool of myself. Handing over the wheel to someone who is capable of doing stupid/unnecessary things (drunk me) is the fear. But in a fucked up way it's what I'm betting on too.

File: 1602369546139.png (707 KB, 600x871)
707 KB
707 KB PNG
Every time I have sex with my wife I feel disgusted from her, and don't want to be near her and regret having sex with her.
This wasn't the situation before though, we've been together for 3 years, and we're both over 30s, so marriage was the sensible move.
I feel sorry for her, because she's very nice woman and I'm lucky to have her as my wife.
But I don't know why do i feel that way.

File: 20240406_151054.jpg (72 KB, 955x1179)
72 KB
Next week I have Monday and Tuesday off. I want to have a mini vacation to by myself in a city. Away from everyone, my family, friends, and even girlfriend. It's been a long time since I've been alone and haven't had any true adult feeling experience yet (I turned 21 last October) Vegas is a 5 hour drive from here, I could go there or just rent a hotel in Phoenix nearby. What would you recommend to do for a solo vacation, the type where you would never tell anyone what happened in those two days.

is it really better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all?
16 replies omitted. Click here to view.
Thanks anon
It depends
So no, not always
nah. being lost destroys everything
This guy is correct.

But a more specific answer OP: The question is incomplete. It iss better to have loved, and then lost, and then learned, and then come to peace, than it is to have loved and lost only. Both are better than having never loved at all. But having never loved at all is a loss - a loss of opportunity to love. So go out there and chase love.

Hey anon, sorry to hear that. Life is not a Disney movie, but I think there is hope for you based on how you have reflected on yourself. Not many people can truly reflect on themselves. You are gifted.

Perhaps, whilst you work down the hours, days, and years of the trauma and the hollowness, you should look for friendship first. Practice the opening of your heart again, the trusting of bonds being made again in general. When you have confidence that some bonds can be real and not all can be shattered (or at least, some can last a long time) then maybe you will find the space to date again. Having a support structure like good friends gives you strength. You may even find yourself becoming a mentor to younger or less experienced people. That's what I've found anyway.

File: IMG_1428.png (1.04 MB, 1179x2556)
1.04 MB
1.04 MB PNG
How bad is it to still be single at 30 as a man?

Real estate is extremely expensive in my country so my only chance at being a home owner is to work remotely from my parents place (I’m a tech worker so I can save $6k per month this way)
Problem is they live in a regional area. There are no women here, let alone educated women.

I’ll have to work here for at least 2 years in order to save up to start a mortgage on my own place. By then I’ll be 29.

The alternative would be to rent in a share house in the city until I can find a gf to rent out own apartment with. But I may never save up for my own place like this.

What should I do?
Is trucking viable for you?
No I just got my provisional licence recently. I wouldn’t be able to truck for at least 2 years also

[Advertise on 4chan]

Delete Post: [File Only] Style:
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10]
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10]
[Disable Mobile View / Use Desktop Site]

[Enable Mobile View / Use Mobile Site]

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.